Woman Scores A Big Prize At Local Casino, Her Estranged Addict Sis Is Livid She Won’t Share It
They say money is the root of all evil. They also say wake up, you need to make money. I think we’re doomed from the start.
What makes it even worse is everything else that dooms us, e.g. greed, entitlements, addiction, just to name a few.
And while some might argue that casinos are also somewhere up in that list, this time around, a casino is, but it also isn’t because it’s not affecting the person who benefited.
More Info: Reddit
It’s not every day that you win it big at a casino. But when you do, of course you want to celebrate it
Image credits: Anna Shvets (not the actual photo)
However, one celebration turned south when an addict sister joined the party and started demanding a share
Image credits: u/National_Ad_4298
In the end, the author of the post decided against sharing, for obvious reasons, but still got flak from the family
Image credits: Anna Shvets (not the actual photo)
A throwaway user shared just how problematic money can get. The 24-year-old woman celebrated her birthday at a casino with her significant other and friends. If being a birthday girl wasn’t enough, she also ended up winning quite a sum in the casino. Of course they had to celebrate it.
Not only did she celebrate with her friends, but she ended up having a bit of a party with family too. Now, OP seemingly didn’t want to tell her sister and husband about why they were celebrating, but mom dropped the ball and now everyone knew OP won it big at the local casino.
The reason why OP didn’t want to tell her sister about it is because she became an addict soon after meeting her husband. There were attempts at interventions, but the family was told to back off and so they did, end of that story.
However, instead of being her nasty self, the sister was nice. This left folks wondering why. Oh, wait, it’s because she later asked OP to share her prize money with her. Like, give her half. Just like that. She supposedly needed it for her new place, but OP knew too well where the money would really go.
After a swift no, the sister insisted, looked OP in the eyes and explained that she was trying to rebuild their relationship. The comment section at this point was already calling bullpies on this one. It was another no from OP and it all went south from there, as the sister and her husband left and were not heard from since. The mom was upset about it all too.
Image credits: Kelsey Chance (not the actual photo)
Speaking of the comment section, the immediate and most unison opinion was the absolute lie about wanting to rebuild relationships because asking for money isn’t the way you do that. Not now, not ever.
Many threw out the YTA judgment at the sister, saying the above as well as not understanding that OP has full right to do with her money as she pleases. But some also pointed fingers at the mother. She too screwed up by not being able to keep her mouth shut, knowing well how the sister might react and also inviting the sister to the dinner without OP knowing.
One person even suggested keeping her winnings in her bank account and making sure hers wasn’t opened by her parents way back when. If that was the case, they might still have access to it and could do something about the money situation. Knowing the mother, this raises warning signs.
Image credits: Pixabay (not the actual photo)
For context, though, money is key in helping someone recover from an addiction. Many addicts end up squandering their savings to fund their recreational habits and when they do end up wanting to recover, they have none to help them through that journey, and the vicious circle continues.
There are a number of things that recovering addicts can do, with the help of friends and family, to make sure they don’t draw in more trouble.
This includes everything from stashing and storing money in a safe place, like a saving’s account; to learning financial literacy and separating needs and wants; to setting and keeping saving goals and aims; to just straight up controlling the inflow of money by means of envelopes and setting up a payday plan. All the while, it’s highly recommended to not lose contact with the rehab and recovery sponsor as they will be able to help keep up the recovery process.
Anywho, the post got over 10,000 upvotes (96% approval rating) with a good handful of Reddit awards. All of this can be seen here. You know what else is there? Not your comments, because they are below in the comment section. Right?
Commenters were of a different opinion though, saying that the sister and the mother were to blame for the conflict
It's a sad truth, but you cannot and should not ever believe an addict, however close to you they are. I know that's easier said than done and most people will, in their heart of hearts, want to believe what they're told by an addict, but addiction is remorseless.
As a former addict, you are correct. Hell, I still don't trust myself and that's a couple decades ago.
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i think the OP wasnt wrong at all. its sad but in the end she is right. an addict is still an addict. my friend used to b an addict and she would say anything to get money from ppl. i remember very clearly her asking for money so she can get dog food for her dogs. i told her id see her tomorrow and the next day i came to her house with 2 giant bags of dry food and 24 cans of wet food. i knew if i gave her money she would use it on drugs not the dogs. in the end she ended up stopping and dealing with the withdrawal symptoms which was painful to watch but she did it for her dogs. shes been clean for 10 years now. one of her dogs recently passed and the other had her 12th bday the other day. my friend still asks for fianacial help every so often but now me and whoever she asks will actually give her the money bc we kno its not going towards drugs anymore.
Good on you for not abandoning your friend and also good on you for building your trust back up with them. It's hard. I know. I've seen more relapses than full recoveries, but I always keep that hope.
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You owe no one a bit of your winnings. It's your money. Your sister is entitled to none of it whether she is an addict or not
Not sure how asking, well demanding, money is fixing a relationship if anything it’ll make it worse. NTA, your money use how you want.
I (42F) have this same problem. Addict sister who (43F) who feels like the world owes her and a mother who tries to force the relationship. I limit what I tell my mom due to the fact she will share with my sister even when asked not to share said information. OP did good standing her ground about her winnings. If she gives in, her sister will never stop harassing her. I get the fact I'm a successful business owner thrown in my face anytime I shut my sister down from money requests. The line "you don't take it with you when you die" mentality is a joke especially since I have yet to hit retirement and our (my husband and I) plan is to be retired by 55. You go girl! Congrats on the winnings and the awesome boyfriend!!
I mean if she walked out on you after saying, "I'm just trying to rebuild our relationship, them good riddance. Family or not nothing entitles anyone to anyone else's property much less personal belongings, ESPECIALLY money. I give thanx to those who cut themselves outta my life as if it was meant to be a wake up call for me. Fuxk that. Opportunist will come from all angles so beware. Stay safe amd God bless 🙌
Congratulations, you’ve joined the same club as big-time lottery winners: relatives start begging for money (including “relatives” you didn’t even know you have), friends from grade school show up wanting to rekindle your friendship (hoping you’ll “lend” them “just a little bit, to tide them over,” and every charity in the world starts guilt-tripping you to contribute. When you win a large amount, it’s best to keep your mouth shut. Also, your sister-the-addict doesn’t deserve your money, not one plug nickel.
Should have told big mouth mom you won maybe 1k instead of how much you really won.
Make sure that you are the ONLY one who can access your money, even if that means opening new accounts at a different bank and closing the original ones. Starting immediately, put your mother on a STRICT information diet; that goes for everyone else as well. Don't be surprised when long-lost friends, relatives (who ordinarily wouldn't give you the time of day), and "financial planners" start materializing out of thin air. Shut down the requests for money by saying, "I already have plans, sorry." By the way, where is sis's husband in all of this?
Never give cash to an addict. Help them with food and human needs, but I can’t tell you how many times I tried to help someone with money and it all went to a fix. My one friend needed money to join our labor union (we work in film) so I could hire her on a job and her grandparents gave her the money instead of just paying the union and every cent of it went to buying drugs. A few thousand dollars. So she couldn’t join and I couldn’t hire her. I helped get her into rehab but she just really didn’t want it, she dropped out of my life and I have no idea where she is now. Last I heard she moved to Las Vegas and was doing god knows what to feed her addictions. Really sad.
I am not sure I read this correctly, but as I understand it SIS say nothing about rebuilding your ralationship before your mother told everyone of your winning? And maybe your mother invited her, because you were coming to celebrate your winning, in the hopes that SIS would benefit. Sad to find your family behaving this way.
The only "rebuilding" was getting her hands on the $$. And OP is 100% right on where that money would have all gone. Even if it was actually used for a house, sister has NO rights to the money, and mom should have kept her trap shut, especially knowing the sister's addiction issues. All could have been avoided by mom using some discretion. So really, it's mom fault
Definitely nta. If you give that sis money you'll never see it again.
NTA. Drug addicts will say ANYTHING to finance their destructive lifestyle, with absolutely no concern for the people they injure. You did exactly what you were supposed to do--turn your sister down flat. Good for you, and bad for your mother. Not only does she have a big mouth, but she is in straight denial about your sister's addiction, which is only enabling her. For one thing, NEVER tell others when you come into money. That's tantamount to flashing your cash in a bar; it usually ends badly.
It's a sad truth, but you cannot and should not ever believe an addict, however close to you they are. I know that's easier said than done and most people will, in their heart of hearts, want to believe what they're told by an addict, but addiction is remorseless.
As a former addict, you are correct. Hell, I still don't trust myself and that's a couple decades ago.
Load More Replies... i think the OP wasnt wrong at all. its sad but in the end she is right. an addict is still an addict. my friend used to b an addict and she would say anything to get money from ppl. i remember very clearly her asking for money so she can get dog food for her dogs. i told her id see her tomorrow and the next day i came to her house with 2 giant bags of dry food and 24 cans of wet food. i knew if i gave her money she would use it on drugs not the dogs. in the end she ended up stopping and dealing with the withdrawal symptoms which was painful to watch but she did it for her dogs. shes been clean for 10 years now. one of her dogs recently passed and the other had her 12th bday the other day. my friend still asks for fianacial help every so often but now me and whoever she asks will actually give her the money bc we kno its not going towards drugs anymore.
Good on you for not abandoning your friend and also good on you for building your trust back up with them. It's hard. I know. I've seen more relapses than full recoveries, but I always keep that hope.
Load More Replies... You owe no one a bit of your winnings. It's your money. Your sister is entitled to none of it whether she is an addict or not
Not sure how asking, well demanding, money is fixing a relationship if anything it’ll make it worse. NTA, your money use how you want.
I (42F) have this same problem. Addict sister who (43F) who feels like the world owes her and a mother who tries to force the relationship. I limit what I tell my mom due to the fact she will share with my sister even when asked not to share said information. OP did good standing her ground about her winnings. If she gives in, her sister will never stop harassing her. I get the fact I'm a successful business owner thrown in my face anytime I shut my sister down from money requests. The line "you don't take it with you when you die" mentality is a joke especially since I have yet to hit retirement and our (my husband and I) plan is to be retired by 55. You go girl! Congrats on the winnings and the awesome boyfriend!!
I mean if she walked out on you after saying, "I'm just trying to rebuild our relationship, them good riddance. Family or not nothing entitles anyone to anyone else's property much less personal belongings, ESPECIALLY money. I give thanx to those who cut themselves outta my life as if it was meant to be a wake up call for me. Fuxk that. Opportunist will come from all angles so beware. Stay safe amd God bless 🙌
Congratulations, you’ve joined the same club as big-time lottery winners: relatives start begging for money (including “relatives” you didn’t even know you have), friends from grade school show up wanting to rekindle your friendship (hoping you’ll “lend” them “just a little bit, to tide them over,” and every charity in the world starts guilt-tripping you to contribute. When you win a large amount, it’s best to keep your mouth shut. Also, your sister-the-addict doesn’t deserve your money, not one plug nickel.
Should have told big mouth mom you won maybe 1k instead of how much you really won.
Make sure that you are the ONLY one who can access your money, even if that means opening new accounts at a different bank and closing the original ones. Starting immediately, put your mother on a STRICT information diet; that goes for everyone else as well. Don't be surprised when long-lost friends, relatives (who ordinarily wouldn't give you the time of day), and "financial planners" start materializing out of thin air. Shut down the requests for money by saying, "I already have plans, sorry." By the way, where is sis's husband in all of this?
Never give cash to an addict. Help them with food and human needs, but I can’t tell you how many times I tried to help someone with money and it all went to a fix. My one friend needed money to join our labor union (we work in film) so I could hire her on a job and her grandparents gave her the money instead of just paying the union and every cent of it went to buying drugs. A few thousand dollars. So she couldn’t join and I couldn’t hire her. I helped get her into rehab but she just really didn’t want it, she dropped out of my life and I have no idea where she is now. Last I heard she moved to Las Vegas and was doing god knows what to feed her addictions. Really sad.
I am not sure I read this correctly, but as I understand it SIS say nothing about rebuilding your ralationship before your mother told everyone of your winning? And maybe your mother invited her, because you were coming to celebrate your winning, in the hopes that SIS would benefit. Sad to find your family behaving this way.
The only "rebuilding" was getting her hands on the $$. And OP is 100% right on where that money would have all gone. Even if it was actually used for a house, sister has NO rights to the money, and mom should have kept her trap shut, especially knowing the sister's addiction issues. All could have been avoided by mom using some discretion. So really, it's mom fault
Definitely nta. If you give that sis money you'll never see it again.
NTA. Drug addicts will say ANYTHING to finance their destructive lifestyle, with absolutely no concern for the people they injure. You did exactly what you were supposed to do--turn your sister down flat. Good for you, and bad for your mother. Not only does she have a big mouth, but she is in straight denial about your sister's addiction, which is only enabling her. For one thing, NEVER tell others when you come into money. That's tantamount to flashing your cash in a bar; it usually ends badly.
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