X User Asked People To Share Their Unpopular Opinion About Friends And 49 Don’t Hold Back
While it is true that the internet is full of knowledge (of varying degrees of credibility, but knowledge nonetheless), it’s also full of opinions (also, varying degrees thereof).
But communication and collaboration through sharing diverse opinions fosters critical thinking and problem solving skills, among many other things.
So, asking strangers on the internet for their unpopular takes on friendship is not a bad way to expand your cranial horizons. Earlier this month, a writer asked folks on X to share their unpopular opinions about friends that might just put them at the sharp edge of a knife. And then cranial horizons were expanded.
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Despite the potential for a dangerous outcome, folks were keen on sharing their takes and the post went viral soon after.
The post itself didn't get all that many likes, a modest 1,800, but the metrics show that it was viewed 80-something million times. So that counts.
This is very true. If someone legitimately hurts someone you love, you can't be 'neutral' with them. It's not possible. If you can be 'neutral' to someone who truly hurt and did wrong to someone else, that's making a choice to put their feelings above those of the victim and that means making a choice against your friend who has been wronged. And if you have ever been in the situation where someone made this claim against you, be aware those people are not your friends. They don't care about you. People who care and are your friends will stand at your side and shun people who hurt you and only do this if you are in the wrong.
I can't say i agree with this in totality. My life long best friend and I talk about people with each other but i have no doubt that both of us don't talk about each other like that when the other is not around. She is my platonic soul mate <3 we almost got married once just for šHïtś and giggles
The responses folks gave included the classics (“You don't know your friends until you’re in need of support.”), the contemporaries (“Your friends don’t need to know everything about you.”), and the truths that never get old (“Learn how to fix things.”). All in all, the thread went viral with 8,000 likes and reshares as well as over 80 million views.
THIS. My friends in my hometown will always be my friends even if we don't talk or haven't seen each other for years. Whenever we do meetup it's like it always was and like we've always never not hung out.
I just had to end a15 year friendship because of his fd up idea of what consent is. Somethings just can't be agree to disagree.
So, why are opinions so important? The gist of it is that having opinions is important. New people in our lives bring new ideas to the table, it has potential for bringing about change, and that’s why it’s key that we as humans share them (within reason, of course, when asked or when the moment is appropriate. Otherwise, you might end up on r/NobodyAsked).
The beauty of opinions is that they define us as individuals, not just allowing others to understand who we are, but also allowing ourselves to do the same.
Opinions require knowledge, which in turn empowers us to be more confident in ourselves as well as allows us to grow through discussion.
And you don't really know yourself until your friends are in need of support.
The challenge with opinions comes with the idea of always challenging them. Keeping an open mind and tackling opinions through discussion can have transformative powers, empowering us to learn new things about the world and how diverse it can be, all the while empowering us to become better people and teaching us to accept that we might have been wrong in our beliefs.
THISSSS!! my best friend in 6th-7th grade told everyone else in our group my crush at the time. the rest of them can be snakes, and kind of were, so i didn't want them to know. she had a better relationship with them than i did, so she just told them. shortly after, after more personal secrets were released, i didn't talk to her for about three weeks. after that we were never really good friends again. moral of the story, like this tweet says, be careful with who you share information with. just because y'all are besties doesn't mean that you can trust them
And while sharing opinions is not a bad thing, given human nature, it can go south really quickly in the wrong time and place. The obvious time and place is when nobody asked. Another wrong time and place is when the other person doesn’t have the aptitude for discussion, so forcing it might lead to a conflict.
Instead, one of the things that you could do is share experiences instead of opinions.
A friend owed me a small amount of money. I didn't ask her about it until I became sick and needed some otc meds and had no money for it. So, I asked her. She didn't have it to give me. Okay. I searched the house over and finally came up with about $5 and went to the store. Who was there? Friend. With a cart full of stuff. Full. Of. Stuff. Can't help me when I'm sick, but had plenty of money for what she needed. It's been 30 years ago. I forgave her and we're still friendly in social situations. But, it's stuck with me that I meant nothing to her. That hurts.
The idea behind sharing experiences over opinions is what also makes human communication effective. Instead of sharing a conclusion, focus on the process of explaining how you got to it.
This should then be followed up with keeping an open mind. Because if you have a black or white “my way or the highway” attitude, it’s only a matter of time when everyone’s screaming and nobody’s listening.
You guys are the type to call for hours, aren't you? I'm happy to go without contact for extended period of time, and still consider the other person my close friends. I did take upon me to juste send a emoji or a quick shoutout to the friends I think of randomely in the day for fear that they think I ignore them or forget about them when it's not the case, I juste have not much to time or stories to sustain a conversation. Same goes with friends who take ages to answer when I ask for news or forget to answer entirely. Life is busy and hard and I would still be delighted to catch up one day in person, be it in a month or 3 years.
OP, I don't completely accept your advice, but I'm not telling you why.
Sharing experiences means communicating where you come from and painting a clear picture through your example. And while your intention might be to teach someone based on your experience, it might not work, but it has the potential to shed some light and compassion on a worldview the other person might not have considered. And sometimes that’s more important.
more than once for some of us. some people are just really s****y.
I refused to condone something a longtime friend was doing (and wanted my help with), and that was that. So sometimes you can lose a friend by being a real friend. But you still should.
It’s more than fine not to share opinions, by the way. Some just find life much more peaceful that way because it doesn’t trigger those who can’t handle opinions. Or they might not want to be judged for that same reason. Or, even, it might not matter at all. Whether it’s because someone is a bit on the blunt side of things or they just don’t care. But if you end up talking, at least try to generate a positive and transformative discussion, and not a scream fest.
There are times when this explicitly has to be said. When a friend's husband died, I said to her, "I will not keep asking you 'How are you doing?' I will always be wondering, and will always be thinking of you. When you want to talk, I will listen, but I won't pry, and I won't try to make you talk." She appreciated having someone in her life that didn't automatically treat her as 'the bereaved' or 'the widow'.
But keep an eye out for the situations where you might be able to help them heal and become what they once were. Most people deserve one 'last chance'
So, what’s your take on any of this? The comment section is eagerly awaiting your input. But if that’s not your cup of tea, then you might just enjoy another listicle of unpopular opinions. Because we’re all about broadening our horizons.
Meet a new friend some years ago. Solid dude, got me to stand up for myself more. Always been to kind for my own good. Another friend who i had known for 15-20 years started going around telling common friends that i had changed and that my new friend had bad influence on me.. So i normalized putting him in his place if needed, now we are not friends anymore because he didn’t like that. 10/10 worth it.
Dear god yes. I love how when someone wants to punch down it’s “fûck your feelings” but when I say “ew, your punching down is gross” it’s “can’t you be more tolerant?”
Define honesty. If you mean telling me when I made an honest mistake and are objectively wrong, then I'm with you. If you mean bullying me by constantly pointing out every minor flaw, especially when it's about my looks on a day I feel like a queen, then you're not honest. You're mean. Even if it's true. If the only reason you're honest is because it's true but does no good to say it, that's cruel. Then this rule applies: if you have nothing nice to say, shut up. I cut out a 'friend' right before my wedding when she felt the urge to tell me my wedding dress was out of fashion and that year had other trends. It was true. But it was precious, fit my type perfectly (which the current trend did not) and I had just said that I felt gorgeous wearing it. It was also very budget friendly since it was from last years collection and she knew I had a tight budget. Nope. Not my friend anymore. She had often bragged about her brutal honesty and that day made me realise that she was just nitpicking.
Depends what you’re talking about. There’s a whole lot of stuff where people put up with being treated badly for a long time and now they’ve had enough. When they say “that’s racist” or whatever, they’re just being honest.
There’s a line. I’ve crossed that line; it happens; it doesn’t make you a bad person. But sometimes you are overloading your friend(s) and you need to readjust.
Pride alone is never a good reason to do anything, so is doing things because you can or because it's not illegal. Kindness means doing things for others you don't have to do and won't harm you, merely to be kind. And while it's important to set boundaries and not be a doormat, sometimes it is important to let things go, especially when the only thing hindering you is pride. Every action you take should have reason and be fair to yourself and others. Doing things solely out of pride is a sin, if you believe in god or not, because it hurts yourself and others.
This is it. Not being friends doesn't mean not having an amicable relationship. Associates and acquaints are not lesser beings. But there are grades in kinship and some people are closer than others. It's important to know the difference and prioritize accordingly. If you are willing to put the same effort into loose acquaintances than into close friendships you'll end up with lots of leeches after loosing all your friends because something has to give and usually close friends will cut you loose if you set them aside for colleagues or randos
I don't know. On one hand, I don't like to have conditions for my friendship. I see that as one of society's biggest issues. It's always you do for me before I'll do for you. On the other hand, I'm often the "shoulder to cry on" friend, but I honestly don't know if I have a "shoulder to cry on" friend.
exactly! and if you are afraid to tell a friend something because of their jealousy.. drop them!
Depends on the amount of jealousy and what it's about imo. I've been jealous of my friends but I don't believe people should run from me
Note: this post originally had 79 images. It’s been shortened to the top 49 images based on user votes.
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If none of your friends are there for you, maybe consider what kind of friend you are to them. And don't come at me with "but I'm the one that's always there for them!" That nonsense is in the same vein as "all my exes are crazy!"
If none of your friends are there for you, maybe consider what kind of friend you are to them. And don't come at me with "but I'm the one that's always there for them!" That nonsense is in the same vein as "all my exes are crazy!"
