Seafood is truly a curious case of cuisine. Allegedly, fresh seafood is very good for you (just look at the longevity of people whose diet consists mostly of seafood!), but if you’re not really used to eating it… The case is a very different one. The same goes for seafood puns - it might not be a topic that’s very common, but reading these food puns will have you in stitches. And you know what they say about laughter (even if laughing too much hurts your sides) - it’s good for you! So, here we are with our list of funny seafood puns, which we hope will cause a bout of laughter instead of an allergic reaction.
So, what should you expect from these seafood jokes? Well, octopi, mussels, oysters, shrimp, krill, and all the thrilling things that are associated with it. And even if you are prejudiced that cephalopods and bivalve mollusks aren’t funny - they definitely are, especially when on your plate. Or, in the instance where they’re the main stars of a cute pun or two. So, yeah, these jokes about seafood won’t leave any stones unturned in the search for the most amusing and the funniest puns; you can trust us on this!
But, enough of decapodiformes and their curiosities - it’s time for the funny puns. You know where to find them, for they are exactly where they are supposed to be - just a bit further down. Once you are there, give the most hilarious pun your vote and share this article with your friends!
Fishes usually sleep on water beds.
Report
When your fish boss is watching, you’d better look e-fish-ent.
Report
Young shrimp is not popular in Japanese cuisine because of short tempura.
Report
We should dolphinitely go easy on the fish puns.
Report
Speaking of being jelly, tunas were really miffed about the whole salmon-ella thing.
Report
How’s the calamari? Why, it’s ex-squid-sit, thank you.
Report
What did fish use Tinder?
To find a gill-friend.
Report
Crabs frantically search for a place to hide so that they can eat alone. I think that's shellfish.
Report
The best job for a crab is being a crab driver.
Report
During Christmas, Santa Claws brings presents to young crabs.
Report
When a crab eats too much it feels clawful!
Report
The kind of helmets that hermit crabs wear are shell-mets.
Report
The crustacean was really unhappy because his wife was being crabby.
Report
A fish's favorite TV Show is 'Whale of Fortune'.
Report
A fish's favorite activity is to surf the net.
Report
Some people don't really like puns about fish, but they are kraken me up!
Report
There is one piece of advice I swear by. Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
Report
I don't think I should buy from the seafood market here. There isn't salmon I can trust.
Report
Ribs become seafood when you go to a so-fish-ticated restaurant.
Report
Whenever I see food, I eat it because I am on a seafood diet.
Report
I cannot eat shellfish that have been steamed in water. I have shellfish steamed issues.
Report
The young shrimp left his job because it was a tempurary role.
Report
Crabs usually call their friends on a shell phone.
Report
You can tuna fish by adjusting their scales.
Report
You should not be making a-trout-cious fish puns. They are of-fin-sive.
Report
My dad quit being a fisherman because his net income was very low.
Report
When jellyfish act catty, it’s only because they’re jelly.
Report
You can’t expect a squid to answer a tough question without inking about it first.
Report
Why do most people dislike anchovies?
Because they’re a little fishy.
Report
What did the dentist say to the super-anxious shark?
Jaws relax.
Report
It was a great oppor-tuna-ty to try new fish!
Report
I love seafood so much. I think it's fintastic.
Report
The shrimp could easily afford to buy a new house because he prawned everything.
Report
Crabs get around on land by using the sidewalk.
Report
The crab and lobster never share their food because they are shellfish!
Report
A crab answers the phone by saying "Shello?"
Report
The crab refused to speak a single word after it went through acute trauma. It was completely shell shocked.
Report
When the baby shark did not have his way with things, he whaled.
Report
A fish with a brain condition should always visit a brain sturgeon.
Report
When a fish is confused, it says, "can you please be a little more pacific?"
Report
When two fish were arguing, one said, "I don't sea it that way!"
Report
Fishes don't like basketball because they are scared of the net!
Report
What’s the only right answer when a salmon asks you for a light?
I didn’t know you smoked, salmon.
Report
I never should have gone to the fishy store. I got prawned.
Report
If anybody steals fish from the store the boss will make them walk the plankton.
Report
When the fish's grades came, his teacher said "Not bad, but you cod do better."
Report
Fish puns are all I have been herring about.
Report
When you mix a fish and a banker, you get a loan-shark.
Report
To make an octopus laugh, you need to give it ten-tickles.
Report
I have not thought of a fish pun yet. Seems like I need some time to mullet over?
Report
I am running out of fish puns. I cannot find any betta ones.
Report
We have no time to address fishcious rumors. We have better fish to fry.
Report
DJ's are banned from working in fish markets because they always drop the bass.
Report
We whaley need to stop now! We've had too much pun.
Report
If you can come up with better fish puns, do let minnow.
Report
A fish's favorite TV Show is 'Tuna Half Men.'
Report
What did you think of the series fin-ale?
Well, it wasn’t the bass-ed.
Report
What’s the one fish that 40 percent of all Americans are afraid of?
Clownfish.
Report
How do fish encourage their college kids?
Any fin is possible, just don’t trout yourself!
Report
I went to the ocean disco last night but I hurt myself. I must have pulled a mussel.
Report
I heard about the fight that broke out in the seafood restaurant. There was battered fish everywhere.
Report
I never should have eaten seafood at that fishy place. I feel eel.
Report
When I went to eat at the seafood eatery, I thought I saw my old friend. But it was salmon else.
Report
When the baby tuna fish was asked his age, he replied, "I am tuna half."
Report
A favorite party game of fishes is 'Salmon says.'
Report
I hated the clownfish that they served in the restaurant. It tasted funny.
Report
The fish chef did not listen to any criticism because he was hard of herring.
Report
The Rock's favorite seafood is a rock lobster.
Report
I made a lot of fish eye soup. It will sea me through the week.
Report
Seafood is really healthy because it is good for the mussels.
Report
A shrimp usually goes to borrow money from a prawn broker.
Report
A necessity while cooking prawns in the kitchen is a-ron.
Report
An indecisive prawn is so tempuramental.
Report
A crab that throws things is called a lobster.
Report
When a crab gets a smartphone they take lots of shellfies.
Report
A crab's favorite fruit is Crab Apples!
Report
When you cross a shellfish and an apple, it becomes a crab.
Report
A meditating crab in self-isolation is called a hermit crab.
Report
A crab who is afraid of small spaces is claw-strophobic.
Report
When the aquarium fish wanted more space, he told the others, "I want to discus something with you all."
Report
A dolphin's favorite type of flour is all-porpoise flour.
Report
The fishes crossed the sea to get to the other tide.
Report
What did one fish say to the other when they met after a while?
"Long time no sea!"
Report
Fishes need a lot of vitamin sea to stay healthy.
Report
Any fin is possible if you trout your gut!
Report
The fish couple made their wedding news o-fish-al.
Report
The fisherman who couldn't read was lost at C.
Report
A lone fish after a disaster is called the sole survivor.
Report
The Lochness monster's favorite thing to eat is fish-n-ships.
Report
A fisherman can never be a good boxer. All he throws are hooks.
Report
Fishes who live at the bottom of the ocean are the ones who dropped out of school.
Report
The bigmouth bass who got caught by a fisherman is now in a boatload of trouble.
Report
The most expensive fish in the market is goldfish.
Report
Just like the tunafish sandwich said, I’ve got a feeling we’re not in cans-us anymore.
Report
Hey, would you mind letting minnow what you think about this one?
Report
The thing about calamari is you can never tell when it’s just squidding.
Report
When a fish meets the love of their life, they say they’ve “met the gill of my dreams.”
Report
Crayfish were offended by the publication of Eat Cray Love because they felt the lack of punctuation might send the wrong message.
Report
Isn’t it a bit misleading to call thinly sliced raw beef carp-accio?
Report
The thing salmons don’t like about tunas is everything’s a big sea-cret.
Report
How do shellfish take photos?
With a clam-era.
Report
What was the Russia Tsar’s favorite type of fish?
Tsardines!
Report
I went to the seafood mart but the employees seemed fishy.
Report
A blind person was eating see-food but it did not help.
Report
The most blessed seafood is holy mackerel.
Report
There are countless good plaices to eat seafood at.
Report
I hate people who crack seafood site jokes. Seems like they are fishing for laughs.
Report
A shrimp that keeps getting hurt is accident prawn.
Report
Crabs love to shellabrate on their birthday.
Report
The crab buffet came with so many restrictions. I should have read the claws before paying for it.
Report
Fishes usually go to learn at the school of fish.
Report
The fish student got bad grades in his school because it was below C level!
Report
One way to make a fish laugh to tell a whale of a tale.
Report
When fishes leave they usually wave goodbye.
Report
The fishes hated going to the beach because it was so un-tidey.
Report
Oh my cod, I laugh so hard when someone cracks a seafood joke.
Report
The fish puns were so funny, they were krilling me with laughter!
Report
The fish that go to heaven are angelfish.
Report
A celebrity fish is called a star-fish.
Report
I am hoping to avoid turtle disaster.
Report
I'm hooked with making fish puns now, but I am still not quite up to scale.
Report
When the two fish became friends, it seemed that they were swimming along nicely.
Report
All I can sea are bass-ically the cod awful fish puns!
Report
To communicate with a fish you haven't met in ages, you should drop a line.
Report
When a fish is hyperventilating due to anxiety, clam it down.
Report
Never fall in love with a blowfish. You’ll always get re-puffed.
Report
When another fish tries to make you think you’re cray-zy, tell them to stop bass-lighting.
Report
Never try to talk to a fish before they’ve caf-fin-ated.
Report
Why isn’t the bachelor fish married?
Because he has fin-timacy issues.
Report
Most fish will tell you that they like their food cold…
And their bait a little worm.
Report
A seafood delivery truck should actually be called a school bus.
Report
When crabs go to coffee shops, they usually order a cup of crab-uccino!
Report
Crabs usually leave the hospital on crotches after treatment!
Report
Crabs only prefer just a pinch of salt in their food.
Report
If you’re going for roe-mance, then you’ll want to consider the caviar.
Report
Lobsters would get along a lot better with the other shellfish if they weren’t always trying to lobster things up.
Report
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
