Parenthood can be very challenging. And even though some moms and dads say there’s nothing more rewarding, others might not feel the same way about it.
There are people who know the role of a parent is not for them; they often choose to be child-free. Others might only come to such a realization after starting a family, which can lead to them regretting having kids. A 2021 survey revealed that as much as 29% of Americans say they want to have fewer children or don’t want to have them at all.
For those who regret becoming parents, admitting that to themselves or others might not be an easy thing to do. But some of them have opened up about it on the ‘Regretful Parents’ subreddit—a safe space for people who think they should not have had children.
A Brooklyn-based actor, writer, and podcaster, Rachel Diamond, discussed the subreddit in one of her TikTok videos. She was replying to a comment someone made, saying that they haven’t met a single person who regrets becoming a parent. Scroll down to find her video and some confessions from parents who do.
@rachelandrue Replying to @aholly7614 #childfree #regretfulparent #childfreebychoice #GenshinImpact32 #fyp #foryou #parenting ♬ Music Instrument - Gerhard Siagian
This TikToker Replied To A Person Saying They Haven’t Met Anyone Who Regrets Having Children With Real-Life Stories From Parents Who Do
Image credits: Rachel Diamond
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I was an 18 year old college student living on my own, having just escaped my abusive family. I fell pregnant and while I was trying to get information on having an abortion, members of a pro-life group sent me tons of messages saying they'd support me financially and emotionally if I went through with my pregnancy, saying they just wanted to be sure I had options. I was extremely depressed and vulnerable and I was living in this haze, and they made me believe having a baby would fix everything. That my problem was that I hadn't fulfilled my life's purpose of becoming a mother, which reinforced a lot of my family's indoctrination I hadn't shaken yet. They dropped their support as soon as I could no longer legally get an abortion, and I had to drop out of college to support myself and my twins. We had rough patches where I thought we'd end up homeless, but I still clung to the hope it would be worth it. My life would be better because I was a mother.
My twins are 6 now. I'm no longer struggling to put food on the table or pay rent, but they didn't fix anything. I think I snapped out of it when they were 2 years old and realized I ruined my life by having them. The horrible thing is I resent them and I feel so emotionally disconnected from them. Sometimes I feel like I'm just their babysitter and I'm waiting for their mom to come pick them up. The idea of 12 more years of this makes me sick.
I never wanted to have kids. It just wasn’t something I felt was meant for me. I have a myriad of health and mental health issues and they just take up so much of my time and energy I never thought I could commit to having a child.
I got pregnant at 21 with my boyfriend at the time. He was excited and I forced myself to feel the same, but the truth is I was completely disconnected my entire pregnancy. Because of my health issues I spent my pregnancy sickly and in pain. I wanted nothing more then for it to just end and I could have my body and my life back.
After my daughter was born she ended up being a “high needs” baby. She was colicky and screamed and cried and slept 30 minutes at a time for the first 6 months of her life. I couldn’t take it. I desperately wanted to give her up but her father convinced me it’ll get better and I was her mother and she only needed me.
As the years went by I never felt truly connected to her. I love her and I care for her but that unconditional maternal love just has never struck me or been there.
Today she’s 4 years old. On the autism spectrum and really hard to deal with. Last year I started distancing myself and cutting my time with her.
She’s thriving and a very happy kid, with or without me. I see her once or twice a week and I’m happy with it. I provide child support to her father and I do what I need to do to provide for her financially but emotionally I just can’t do it.
I know this makes me a monster in most peoples eyes and I’ve accepted this judgement from society.
She has family and a father that take great care of her but unfortunately I will never be that mother for her.
I guess I’m just here to say that it’s ok to feel this way. And I’m open to questions or thoughts on my situation.
The actual reason I had a kid was just pressure from society. I mean, this is what people are supposed to do you know? I’ve always made so much effort ticking all the boxes what people are “supposed to do”. I’m 30 years old and my biological clock is ticking. All my friends have kids so I thought to myself that it was now or never. Now I have this beautiful, healthy, lovely 2 year old whom I love more than words - make no mistake, I’m a good mom. But what I want is sleeping in, going to the gym whenever I want, travel, doing spontaneous things etc. That was my life before my daughter was born. I don’t feel this “rewarding” feeling everyone are talking about. I feel bitter and unfulfilled.
I feel this so much. And it's not really society pressuring me. I ALWAYS wanted to have kids. Two to be precise. Now I have a wonderful three year old, my relationship is possibly ending and all I want is my freedom. I love my daughter to pieces, I would never change a thing about having her and I think I'm a good mom for her, and I love being her mom. But I think, if I didn't know her, didn't know the love for her, but knew what I have to sacrifice of myself - I wouldn't have gotten pregnant.
I always had my suspicions, but hearing him actually say it out loud was jarring to hear.
He told me that on the night we conceived our oldest, he got me really, really drunk while he stayed sober. When I was too drunk to even remember what happened, we had sex without a condom. Again, I don’t remember this happening. I thought I got pregnant the day after, because he said that condom accidentally broke during sex.
I asked him why he felt the need to do that. He said that he needed to get me pregnant, because he was scared that I was going to party and leave him and live my life when I turned 21. He didn’t want me to turn into a “whore”.
We have three kids now. This was 10 years ago. While I don’t necessarily regret my kids, I feel like my right to choose was taken away. I wanted an abortion with our second for mental health reasons. He still mocks me about it to this day, and even told our oldest daughter that I almost aborted her sister. He guilted me out of getting one.
I regret not having a carefree time in my entire adult life. When I got pregnant, I was only 20. My husband was 26, so he already got to have his whole, fun college experience.
Those would be my main regrets. My kids are all amazing, smart and lovely humans. I have spent the entirety of my 20’s making sure they are well-balanced and that they have a great childhood. However, I feel like I never got to be “me”. I still don’t know who I am. I had to grow up with my kids, and that’s not easy to do.
That is rape. I don't give a f**k if he was your boyfriend, that is rape. He has no idea what it's like to go through child birth, and I guarantee you he played a small role in raising those children, he had no right to guilt you. I sincerely hope you divorced that manipulative son of a b***h, and I hope he gets castrated afterwards.
I had surgery so my son has been with his dad (who has never been this helpful before) and my parents. I'm 3 days into not having had to deal with him and it's been the best days of my life in 8 years. I feel so bad... But so good. I won't get him back until Sunday and I wish this could last forever.
He's severely autistic and screams all day and gets into things and hurts himself and me.
I'd have surgery once a month if it would help me have a whole week without him.
I’m tired of people trying to make me feel bad because I didn’t want to deal with this nightmare of a diagnosis. I straight up admit I absolutely did not f**king want a special needs child which is why I aborted my first pregnancy - there was a chromosomal abnormality so I noped out real quick.
Got just about every damn test you could with the second pregnancy and everything was fine. But no. Autism.
All I ever f**king wanted was a normal family, is that so much to ask? My life growing up was walking on eggshells because of my mentally ill father and intellectually disabled sister. Then I was free. Only to get dragged back into hell.
I’m tired of all the extravagant accommodations and never ending extra s**t that goes into autism. We’re supposed to bend over backwards to children who only care about their immediate needs and themselves no matter what the f**k anyone else’s needs are - and then we get blamed for churning out entitled a***oles.
I’m tired of this broken f**king kid and never ending heavy burden. While I would never hurt him I can absolutely see how this breaks some parents and these nightmare kids end up getting thrown off a bridge. (I’m not saying I would throw him off a bridge you drama queens, I’m saying I can understand how parents snap)
Pre natal diagnostics needs to get on the f**king ball.
People need to stop attacking you. This is completely understandable, and one of the reasons I don't want kids. I am not prepared for a kid with special needs. There is so much that comes with it, and depending on how bad it is they could end up living a pointless life. I don't want to pass on anything I have, either. It'd be cruel to the child if I were to do that. She didn't end a life because they weren't normal, she aborted a fetus with no emotions or feelings because she didn't want to go through that hell.
Just venting... but it just sucks. My wife and I (M - 30s) always agreed we didn't want kids. I was on a waiting list for a vasectomy but she was on the pill since forever.
I guess a soldier slipped, and now all of a sudden abortion is off the table. She wants to give motherhood "a try". It's definitely her body and her right to choose, but I certainly feel betrayed and hurt with all this. I have zero paternal desire in my bones, I value my free time and financial independence, I had hopes to retire in my 40s, but now all this is suddenly ripped from me and I feel like I have no say.
Wish I'd made that appointment sooner. Now I feel resentful towards her, and just not looking forward to my life in 4-5 months at all.
I can understand the OP's feelings here. You two agreed and she went back on her word. Also, one does not "try out" motherhood. It's forever, no returns, no exchanges. Only someone 100% committed to being the best parent they can be should have a child. Kids aren't goldfish. They deserve to be wanted, loved, cherished, and protected. I can only hope OP falls make in love with that baby.
Some of my younger coworkers were talking about why they don't want kids, and I just felt this sinking feeling inside me. I wish I had been more true to myself and continued with my knowledge that I never wanted kids, but I felt maternal feelings that were actually just a part of loving my now husband. A baby wasn't the answer to my body's question, but we thought it was. I thought this is what I wanted at that point and then I did it and I hate it. I love my daughter (she is 3) but if I had the opportunity to go back in time I would never have gotten pregnant. I learned the hard way that "I want to have a baby with this person" is a very different thing from "I want to be a parent".
So I envy my coworkers who are currently in that position of knowing they don't want kids and wanting to sleep in and hang out with friends and do whatever they want without either dragging a kid along or trying to find childcare. That was me and then I made a life altering decision I now have to live with.
Okay, I commented on another post. But THIS is what I feel. And also, one of my good friends is pregnant, 6th month after 2 failed pregnancies. And I wondered all the time, if I should tell her, how I feel. But at the same time - you can't really understand how it is, until you can't change it anymore.
Just a rant.. we had a bad morning. 50/50 custody of 5 year old. Shy around other adults. And with her peers , she is bad with sharing, brags a lot, competitive and a sore loser. She has no friends because other moms have decided she’s too “mean”.
I know that it’s all mostly my fault. I haven’t been that great of a mom. I really have tried but it’s been so hard. I’m in tears right now writing this. I work so hard to keep a good, warm home. I only work school hours so she’s never had before or after school care, every single thing I do, I do for her. And it’s never good enough. And I’m fried. I’ll never meet a person who would want to share a life with me with this ungrateful, angry, rude little person who I’m now stuck with for the next decade and a half.
Not really looking for advice. Just a place to say the things that I really should never say out loud to anyone. I feel like I want to start drinking and it’s only 9:30 in the f**king morning..
I'm 26 this year, so a bit too old for my mother to have had the internet as a support network the way people do now, but I wish she did and could have whined it out here when I was younger instead of constantly making me feel like an unwanted piece of s**t when I was growing up with all her comments like "having you ruined my body", "I used to have a fun life before you came along", "I'd have a better job if I didn't have to pick you up from school every day", "having a baby young ruins you life", "your father trapped me when he got me pregnant" (I was born in a country where abortion was very hard to get at the time. You basically had to be very rich and able to afford a very high end clinic that would take bribes to give you the illegal at the time abortion pill).
I don't resent her for regretting and disliking parenthood. I'm childfree myself so I totally get it. But I resent her for how she handled it. I have all sorts of mental health issues as a result of being unwanted and hearing about it all the time. Just let people vent here. Better they vent here instead of to their kids.
I have one child. One and done. Last and only.
If l am honest, it was an unwanted and surprise pregnancy. I hated absolutely everything about being pregnant. Breast feeding made me feel like a cow. I had serious PPD. My child was fussy, always had a cold or teething (or both) and generally a difficult baby. I have a protective bond but if I could magically wave a wand and start again, I'd be child-free.
My marriage was never the same after the baby. My husband has a huge family who wants us to have more kids and I still hear about it. My husband adores our child who is about to turn 5. If I'm honest, I sometimes fantasize about running away and getting a little one bedroom place of my own. He can go for it solo. I hate being a parent. My kid is sweet, but the prospect of dealing for another decade and change is beyond words depressing. I often feel like I'd rather just be a cool aunt and connect occasionally instead of 24/7.
But the worst? The Warrior Mommies. The women who constantly tell me how lucky I am. Who think everything about motherhood is a goddamn art form. Who shame and blame if you don't join in their whole "go mama! This is your purpose on earth! Let's celebrate it!" natural birth/co sleep/breastfeed til they are 5 kind of rah rah BS. I loathe and despise this. I have withdrawn from friendships with women like these. I now seem only to spend time with child free people when I get a moment to actually socialize.
I just wish people were honest. Not everyone finds parenting rewarding. Not everyone thinks birth is a magical experience or that breast milk is manna from heaven. My husband does not understand why I'm not more enthusiastic. I wish regretful moms had more of a voice.
Ok now this one I can understand. It was completely honest and I completely understand where you're coming from.
My daughter is 2. Her pregnancy wasn’t very planned, the pregnancy was difficult, the birth was hell, and the postpartum was a living nightmare coping with a permanent injury from the birth. I had a surgery 1 year after it and finally started to feel better about 6 months ago.
Every single night when work is over, or I have to leave an appt to come home, I just don’t want to. I just sit in my car alone honestly for several minutes. It feels like I can’t move my entire body, it feels like climbing Mount Everest to start the car and actually drive it home. I’ve never felt dread like this in my life. Or I sit in the driveway after I’ve arrived and just feel like I physically can’t pull myself inside. I just can’t do it.
It’s not that I don’t want to see my husband or daughter. It’s the mountain of responsibilities that fill me with dread. The incessant needs. I can’t do it anymore. Yesterday I just sat in my car for 30 minutes.
I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just don’t want this life, I don’t want it. It’s been a living nightmare. None of it is rewarding. Maybe im just an antisocial psychopath. What kind of monster doesn’t find having a child rewarding?
(Yes I’ve been in therapy for 8 years and I’m on medication for anxiety/depr. Plz don’t tell me to look into those things. I care deeply about my health and have had to fight/scream for medical care the last 3 years and I’ve exhausted every Avenue.)
I'm a regretful SAHM to a 3yo. Not a "I love my child but I hate being a mom" parent either, I feel responsibility and obligation towards my kid, but I don't love them. I try my best to hide it cos I know they deserve better, I tell them I love them, I'm affectionate, etc. But I'm counting down the days til they start school and I finally get a break. (Can't afford daycare, no babysitters)
I've seen people comment on tiktoks and articles about this subreddit with stuff like "well don't have a kid if you don't actually want them!" Or "some people can't have kids so you should be grateful!" Well newsflash to those holier than thou observers: you don't know you're going to be a regretful parent til you become a parent, and then there's no going back.
This kid was planned, wanted, years in the making. Every period was a crushing disappointment. We were looking into fertility treatment when we finally conceived, but miscarried that pregnancy at 8 weeks. I tried to see the silver lining of "well at least now we know we can get pregnant!" But I was devastated at the time. Now I know nature was trying to save me from this hell. A few months after the MC, we got pregnant again and this one stuck. I was cautious after the MC, but optimistic. I sang and talked to my bump, looked forward to meeting my baby.
Some people say their whole universe shifts when they meet their baby, and they fall instantly in love. But plenty of articles try to reassure you that that doesn't happen to everyone, so don't worry too much if you're not immediately smitten, it'll come in time, etc.
None of them said I would look at my baby for the first time and my first thought would be "I've made a huge mistake". And that was before the sleep deprivation began.
It's harder than I ever thought it could possibly be. There are no breaks, because even on the very rare occasion that I do get to go out alone, I know I have to come home so I'm never truly relaxing. Never truly able to get back to a baseline level of happiness. I feel like I'd need at least two weeks away to even begin to feel like a human being again.
I could list all the reasons why, but most people in this sub already know. The never ending monotony, the lack of time, money, agency, being touched out and over stimulated constantly, etc.
Recently some friends told me they were thinking about having a kid and without even thinking about it, I blurted out "oh god, why?!" I genuinely cannot recall a single reason I wanted a child, though I know I had some at the time. Other friends have posted pregnancy or birth announcements on social media, and I cannot bring myself to lie and say congratulations. There's nothing to congratulate, the poor idiots are about to ruin their lives, and they're doing it by choice, just like I did.
And I know I can't warn them, because it's not an acceptable thing to say, and they would never believe me. I also try and remind myself that other people obviously do not experience parenthood the same way as me, cos otherwise they'd all stop at one kid like I've done, but I honestly don't know what it is they're getting from this experience that I'm not. It's not rewarding or fulfilling or makes life worth living or any of the other trite clichés people trot out about having children. It's just hell.
You know that feeling you get at the tail-end of winter, when it feels like you haven't had the sun on your face for ages? It feels like it's been cold forever, and every morning feels gray, and you look forward to spring when you won't have to put on your boots and coat to scrape the ice off your car while you freeze your a*s off?
Imagine trying to explain that feeling to someone who's spent their whole life in the tropics. You can complain about the cold, but it's not really the cold. It's not the snow, either. And having to put on boots in the morning, or drive a car on icy roads? None of these things seem like a big deal in isolation. Even combined, they don't seem overwhelming to an outsider. Anybody can do winter for a while.
It's really the bitter endlessness of it. Waking up to it day after day after goddamn day. The dark, the cold. The petty frustrations that together are more than the sum of their parts.
That's what being a parent has been like for me. Only, instead of being able to look forward to spring, the only thing on the horizon is more winter. Decades of winter. I know that sounds melodramatic, but I swear it's the best analogy I can think of.
It's bleak. And it can be harder still knowing that you chose this. You could be sitting in Mexico under the hot sun, salsa dancing and sipping margaritas. But instead, you picked 18 years of winter. Possibly more. And that decision can seem very, very stupid when you're shoveling your driveway while subzero winds blow snow in your face.
If you only have one kid and you are regretful or straight up not having a good time, DONT HAVE ANOTHER. Not even when they tell you that it will be easier because they can play together. Not even when your partner begs you. Not even when you feel like your kid needs a sibling. Just don’t do it. I have seen SO MANY PEOPLE that have more kids because they feel like they are supposed to. Because they feel like if they don’t they will irreparably damage their kid.
Your child will be fine. Stay with one. It is a thousand times easier.
Signed,
An only child who turned out just fine.
I've written a huge post before how frustrating my child is because her ADHD makes her so damn difficult. Therapists are at a loss with her. There is a real possibility I'll have to quit my job to home school her because her school can't handle her. But apparently this makes me ableist. I'm so sick of it. It is so challenging to have that kid, and I resent that my frustration with it is labeled as "ableist". I feel like most people who had to raise a child like mine would regret and regret it too.....
I was a teacher and I'm here to say that not all children are perfect, delightful little angels. I've had some who were so bad, obnoxious, destructive, and disruptive that they ruined the school year for me and every other kid in my class. What do we do, even societally, with the children who just can't be reformed?
Never getting enough sleep? Constant whining and crying? Going to battle at every meal? Constant anxiety? Curing a cold while having a cold? Not a single moment to yourself? Always needing to do laundry? Always needing to do dishes? Strained relationship with partner? Judgement from parents? Surrendering your tidy home? Losing your identity? Falling behind at work? Worrying about expenses?
Why do we do this?
I know every experience is unique, but I was away for the weekend and when I got back my 2.5 year old daughter jumped into my arms and said "Daddy home!! I missed you daddy!" And damn if that wasn't the greatest thing ever.
I was raised as a Mormon in a very traditionally Mormon household. The only thing I was raised and bred to do was to raise and breed more babies. That was my only calling, education and careers were never emphasized. I was sent to college for an “MRS. degree”, to find a man who would make enough money to take care of me so I could be the 50’s STAHM I had been training my entire life for. I had an inkling at 21 that I didn’t like children when I worked at a daycare. But I ignored it. I had my child at 24 which was “old.” 4 months after he was born I had my “oh s**t” moment. I didn’t like motherhood. This was NOT what all the Mormon women in Relief Society and my Young Women leaders told me it would be my entire life. There are moments where I’ve felt true delirium. From the sleeplessness. There’s no other word to describe it. He’s 3 now. I’m a single mom. I left the Mormon church. I never finished college. He was just diagnosed with autism and I’m calculating all the bills that are on the horizon with insurance and ABA therapy. I feel like I’ll never be able to get ahead. I work full time and side hustle and donate plasma where I can. My village is tiny and all prices for everything keep rising. I miss taking care of myself, my body exists only to labor. Im 27 but I feel 37. When I look in the mirror I see nothing but a tired, empty, broken wisp of who I was and who I wish I could be. I blame the church for never giving me other options than motherhood. I didn’t know I could be something else. What dreams would I have had? I love my son but I’ll never have another.
I have wanted to adopt kids (not babies) since I was a teenager. Just realized yesterday that I have tokophobia. I NEVER wanted to give birth and thankfully haven't. But my husband and I did adopt 2 children from Poland (They were 8 & 9), hopeful that we would give them a happy, loving home and family.
They had Reactive Attachment Disorder (and other disorders) and made life hell. Our son was incredibly violent. I won't go into detail but tell one story. He was sent to a behavioral hospital for the first time at 10. I told the therapist there that I was afraid he'd someday rape me or kill me. Her response: "It's good that you recognize that.". Daughter was less violent. Both were manipulative, disrespectful, selfish, gaslighting, and self-sabotaging. Daughter also became a shoplifter. She stole from me a LOT too. And she binge ate our food.
Both are now grown. Son left our home the last time at 14 (to another behavioral hospital which suggested we NOT pick him up) and became a ward of the state. Daughter left 5 months short of 17. Our home is now peaceful. Our finances have improved. We're not calling cops to our house every few weeks--or days.
I am no contact with them--and several family members who turned against me based on our kids' lies.
They can still contact my husband. Our son has from time to time. We haven't heard from our daughter in years.
I do regret having adopted them. But I'm grateful to be past them now. Of I could go back and talk to the me who so wanted to adopt that it hurt every Mother's Day, I'd tell her that she's better off with cats, to save the money for retirement or travel or anything but adoption. The chances are just too high that she'd end up with kids who couldn't love, and who would try to destroy everything she cared about. She could host foreign students maybe. (We can't now, thanks to CPS blaming us when the problems actually stemmed from early childhood trauma from their neglectful and abusive birthparents.)
I used to be a real advocate for adoption. I'm not anymore. I wish I was just childless.
To anyone adopting, not being able to spend time with the child as part of the adoption process is a huge red flag. Visits are important for both parents and children, before just being shipped off to a stranger's house, you have to build trust. If an agency is not willing to let you do that, they aren't looking out for the children, and won't have given good care up to that point. Don't give them business. They only stay operational because people are desperate enough to cut corners or don't really consider children people, but accessories. Either way, those people should not be parents. The tendencies described in this post would have been showing at the time of adoption, yet no serious care/therapy was given or disclosed. Stories like this are why so many are scared off adoption. Go though a responsible agency, and this won't happen.
I’ll preface with saying that I do love my children , but It absolutely drains every single part of my being. To the point where I’m not sure I can keep going much longer.
I hate how I went undiagnosed with a neurological disorder my entire life until recently, which makes being a parent/partner so damn difficult. I could have made better choices had I known.
I hate that I grew up thinking because I was a girl, having kids was just part of life. I hate how we don’t normalize conversations surrounding the topic of NOT having children.
I hate that I even feel this way. Not like they asked to be here. So I go through the motions and try my best . For them. But what I wouldn’t give to go back 20 years and make different choices.
I love my child now he is here but I never wanted a child. My husband did. I put it off and then he ended up moving over to my side of the fence. In the end we agreed not to renew my contraception.
I was expecting it to be hard but not this hard. It’s horrendous. I’m done.
Parent to a 3 and 4 year old. I do not believe any parent actually enjoys their children or doesn't regret having kids. Everytime I see a picture and caption of how much a parent loves their kid and it's all smiles and giggles, I think that people post these things for likes to get a little dopamine surge to counterbalance the s**tstorm their life has become.
I wish more people were honest about parenthood. I wish I knew whether people actually felt immediate bonding with their babies and genuinely enjoy their kids, because I am convinced it's all a facade to ease the hollowness of parenthood.
I get you don't like your child, but some parents genuinely love and could not be without their kid. Some people are happy, and of course it's not all smiles and giggles, but it makes them feel good. I think people aren't always honest about it, but don't just assume everyone resents it because you do.
I mean there’s currently f**king YOGURT splattered all over the kitchen and living room and yogurt handprints all over the front door, back door and living room window. Why? You see I just cleaned the windows! You helped me! Why do this??? There are like 80 legos in the bathtub and bathroom sink. I opened the fridge and the milk was tipped over on the top shelf and poured over everything. How? She’s 3 feet tall! There’s literally HUMAN POOP smeared on the couch. How??? She’s fully dressed and wearing a diaper! This has all happened this morning WHILE IM CLEANING THE HOUSE and is like this all the time. I can’t get ahead of it. I can’t live in squalor but no matter how much I try to clean, it gets completely destroyed instantly. Faster than instantly. Simultaneously. This is one three year old child. She is an agent of pure destruction and chaos and filth. And she works fast. And she never f**king stops.
This has been today’s insane rant/screaming into the void. Thank you for reading.
I had one I called Destructo Baby. Destroying everything, making messes faster than I could clean them, getting into EVERYTHING was her super power. My EX-husband thought our house was a constant mess because I was just lazy. Truth: I didn't stop all day long, from the time she woke up until I put her to bed, every damn day. I feel you, girl! The good news? She's now an adult in her mid 20s. Smart, funny, super organized, best and tidy, and very successful. I couldn't be more proud of her, and we are super close, too. Hang in there. And hire help if you possibly can!
In my close circles of acquaintances, I have several women who were all ambivalent about having children or staying CF but in all of the cases it was overwhelmingly the men who convinced them to have kids. I think it might be because women come into contact with household and child rearing duties sooner and more frequently than men which is why men have this strange Disney-like notion about having children.
Was it similar for some of you or just the opposite?
I’ve got a three year old daughter. I always knew I wanted to be a parent. I loved babies, and I couldn’t wait to have my own! I’ve hated every second of it since the moment I got pregnant. My kid sucks. She’s cute, and spunky, but it’s too much! She recently started hitting, kicking and biting when she doesn’t get her way. She’s always running away from me, and she never sits still. I honestly can’t handle it. A few days ago, she ruined my expensive eye cream and wiped my brand new mascara all over her toys and the bathroom cabinets. In reaction to this, I made sure to move all my makeup into my master bathroom cupboard. Today, as I was getting ready, I had my cupboard open, she raced in, grabbed something, and ran out. As I chased her, she dropped a makeup bag. I figured I was in the clear, and went back to getting ready. A little while later, I went to her playroom only to find that she’d taken a different makeup bag at the same time as the other! She’s squeezed all of a new small bottle of face cream and a bottle of base into her toy teacups. She’d also taken a brand new pencil eyeliner and drawn all over! My extra mascara, also new, was open on the carpet. I made her leave the room (I might have been loud), and then sat on the floor and sobbed.
I can’t keep up with all the cleaning, all the annoying noises and movements, and ruining all my stuff everyday! Why did I do this to myself?! I love her, but I hate her too.
Keep the doors shut or locked to your rooms she doesn't need to go into your bedroom .. any trashing of stuff..she loses her toys for a week...consequences.
We used to be in love. Now we hate each other. This child has taken all our love and energy and positivity out of us.
I hate being a mother. I hate my husband. I hate that my baby is too perfect and too pure and I'm not good enough for him. I can't even function like a normal adult. I'm exhausted all the time. Sometimes I spend hours fantasizing about drowning myself in the river. I want to die to escape my responsibilities. But I can't die because I'm a coward and a b**ch who doesn't deserve to be a mother.
My 7 year old has been begging me to go to my grandma's condo in the mountains for a year. Figured I'd make her happy for spring break. She made everything so miserable this time around that we left a 3 day trip after 26 hours.
We are to keep the condo pristine and my child wrecked it in less than a day. Filth everywhere, everything rearranged, etc. It took me an hour to clean up today after only staying a night. And she defaced my late great grandmother's dining room chair with pen. I couldn't remove it. Oh and before we went to breakfast she dropped her favorite stuffed animal in the toilet and got toilet water everywhere.
Everything we tried to do she complained the whole time and was a complete brat. Today was the final straw when she got everything I could give her and she was crying about her ice cream being too cold. I was like, we are going home. I'm done.
Whines the entire car ride home.
Why would anyone have more than one kid? Why does anyone have kids on purpose at all?
And what the hell am I going to do about summer? All daycare programs seem insanely expensive .
So many posts about kids trashing homes. Back when I was a kid that was an absolute no-no! I always remember my childhood home was clean, and both my sibling and I weren't allowed to make any mess. Is it just me, or somebody else have the same childhood experience?
I woke up today and feel defeated with parenting and work. I just feel uninspired with everything. Like i dont want to do anything anymore. I’ll try to take a nap on weekends but can't seem to have a full rest. I still feel tired as f**k and will only wakeup with a massive headache. I feel like parenthood “broke” me. Everything hurts.
Ps. Love my baby to death but sometimes I feel like i shouldnt be a parent.
I dont know. Maybe im just exhausted with everything. I just want to feel normal again.
I will literally financially support my child to live on their own right when they're legally allowed to do so. Then I can finally have some peace and quiet. Hopefully by then I'm able completely support myself financially, but with the high cost of living in my city I will likely be dependent on my parents, a spouse or roommates for decades to come.
That is all.
But what if the parents or spouse want to live on their own? What if they find out you are latching onto codependent relationships you would prefer not to be in. All these other people have a right to the fulfilling relationships or their own space that they choose too...
I'm sick of how loud she is. I'm sick of the way she doesn't listen. I'm sick of the way she keeps doing things when I ask her repeatedly not to do them. I'm sick of the fart jokes and sounds. I'm sick of the constant need for attention. I'm sick of her inability to sit still and be quiet for even two minutes. I'm sick of how I can't take her anywhere without her potentially causing a scene. I'm sick of her yelling out MOMMMMMM all the time. I'm sick of how my partner and I are so drained from her that we have a dead bedroom.
I'm so so so so so sick of this kid.
I'd give anything to have a do-over and not have her.
Daycare..or babysitter...family can help?..sometimes a dog might keep her company ? She sounds bored and annoying uoy for attention..
Note: this post originally had 60 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
The reason why somebody might never hear about people regretting having kids is because it's largely socially unacceptable. If people still get scandalized when a person just says they are childfree, imagine what would happen if somebody with kids said they wish they'd never had them.
They do on Facebook. The page is called "I Regret Having Children" Stories worse than some of these
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I've had people tell me that they hope I'm forced to be a parent someday. I'm so thankful for my hysterectomy.
BP does a lot of these posts once in a while, but I believe this one is the one that goes the hardest so far.
The reason why somebody might never hear about people regretting having kids is because it's largely socially unacceptable. If people still get scandalized when a person just says they are childfree, imagine what would happen if somebody with kids said they wish they'd never had them.
They do on Facebook. The page is called "I Regret Having Children" Stories worse than some of these
Load More Replies... I've had people tell me that they hope I'm forced to be a parent someday. I'm so thankful for my hysterectomy.
BP does a lot of these posts once in a while, but I believe this one is the one that goes the hardest so far.
