Older Women Were Asked To Share Something That Young Women Do That Puzzles Them, And 30 Didn’t Hold Back
In a post on r/AskReddit, platform user u/IslamicAnime addressed older women: "What is something young women are doing that puzzles you?" and the answers quickly started pouring in, attracting a diverse range of perspectives.
The dialogue that emerged highlighted the generation gap and shed light on contrasting experiences between the two camps, with some older women expressing confusion over the obsession with social media and the constant need for validation while others said they can't understand why 20-something-year-olds get so many beauty procedures.
However, many older women also expressed curiosity and a willingness to learn from their younger counterparts, acknowledging the need for intergenerational connections that benefit both parties.
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I kinda hate the claw like nails that are popular right now.
They are SO good at makeup. I don’t know if it’s because they have better products, the availability of tutorial videos or both but they all look amazing and we were walking around with orange faces and smudged eyeliner. Not gonna lie I’m a little jealous
Edit: so many bitter people in these replies!
Makeup is a hobby. It might not be one that you enjoy but that doesn’t invalidate it.
We should respect and uplift all women and however they choose to express themselves, wether it’s by wearing makeup and miniskirts or carhartts and axel grease.
It's the tutorials! I used to be terrible at make-up, but there are SO many tutorials with step-by-step instructions, including which colours look good on which skin types, how to apply make-up, how to care for your skin, which products to use, which ingredients to look out for... a year after casually watching these tutorials, I think I've gotten pretty good. It makes things so much easier.
The overdone lip injections. I can’t wait for this trend to die.
Voting against their own interests. I know so many young women who are 100% for birth control, abortion, equal pay, maternity leave, etc yet consistently vote Republican because "the economy is the most important issue." Now theyre shocked Roe was overturned. Nothing is more important than your rights/freedom!
A woman voting for a Republican is like a chicken voting for Col. Sanders.
Not limited to women, but: gender reveal parties. I already have to go to your baby shower, and now you want me to go to another party? Do I have to bring a gift?
Wearing comfy shoes (like sneakers) to the club.... I'm not mad at it, I'm mad my dumbass never did that... lol
Taking pictures of yourself all the time. Even as a younger person I can't imagine doing this.
Blasting pictures of their young children all over social media with 1000 followers.
Having children with men who are basically children themselves. If you're living with a guy and he doesn't do a genuine 50% of the housework, it will be exponentially worse when you have a baby.
Let me fix it for you - not genuine 50%, minimum 50%. As a guy i grew up in a household where my father, his father, my uncle etc were taught that you always, always pick up for yourself. Now, my dad cooks and helps a little, but my mom taught me to always, and i mean always help my gf/future wife with anything with words: She will keep your house a home so pick up your a*s and help her.
Posting non stop content and then caring so much about what strangers say about them online. As if life isn't difficult enough for women without finding new and unnecessary standards to hold yourself up too. It all seems like an exhausting, pointless and mentally draining exercise.
This point! If you share online, I assume you are aware that you will get any type of responses. I think most people post carelessly without thinking first if they are mentally prepared to deal with whatever comes with it. My brother's girlfriend is an example. She likes to post pictures of her naked body (covering breast and crotch areas) for "body positivism". But then she gets very angry and upset when people send her negative feedback or sexual comments. She even posted a video of herself crying on how these comments upset her. I don't know...if the expectation is to only get likes and compliments, then not sure on which planet they are living. Would be nice, yes, but... well... if you have the freedom to post your body another person has the freedom to say "I don't like this".
Sending nudes and trusting the recipient
I work with middle school and high school kiddos. No, your boyfriend does not keep these to himself!
Influencers and those who are influenced by them. It drives me crazy! So many of these influencers are just narcissistic idiots who really don’t know anything but if they are pretty and talk a good game, people follow them and believe in their “brand”. So much focus on body image - it’s no wonder depression is spiking.
Crying on the internet. I’m talking full on snot bubble crying. Maybe it’s my childhood trauma talking but I can’t fathom having an awful thing happen to me and then whipping out my phone to tell my “followers” about it. Maybe bc I have No followers😂 I just bury it deep and slap on a smile like my mom taught me 💗
I am bewildered by women who do not prioritize the ability to support themselves.
Big, fluffy false eyelashes. I tried it once and it felt like caterpillars on my eyelids, they had to come off right away. I don't know how they stand it, but I admire their skill.
(Edit: Just wanna make it clear here, I'm not about s******g on the aesthetics of young people. You do you, my sweet children! It's just not for me.)
Why the need for 5 parties, 2 wedding dresses, B and C lists, and numerous other demands… just to get married.
Like, just get married. It’s not that complicated. Save the money (and more importantly, your guests’ and bridal party’s money) for something that will actually mean something - charity, home down payment, personal enrichment in classes or travel… whatever, the sky is the limit. Spare yourself the time and stress of going overboard to follow the new cultural norms.
*Traditional, generational customs need not apply… though maybe they should be questioned and re-examined.
I spent the money on a marriage license.... Gifted our preacher....wore a dress I owned..... But I married the most perfect man for me and we are deliciously happy..... Why all the extras?
I know a few 17-18y/old girls who have decided not to learn to drive or get licensed because their boyfriends always have cars; not to finish school because they don't enjoy it; and don't ever want to vote because that stuff's boring.
They have these precious rights to be free, to be educated, to be heard, and they don't care!
(Regarding the car thing - we're in a semi-rural area with limited transport options.)
Incredibly long nails and over the top false eyelashes.
I think long nails look pretty and some have really good artwork done, but my god they're so impractical/unhygienic
Creating new body shaming trends like tight gap, nose gap, size of waist etc. Things men don’t even know exist, so it’s purely and solely women creating absolute nightmare of beauty standards for other woman. Growing up in the 00s it was traumatic and I wished newer generations would have stopped
I'm 33 so I don't consider myself old yet, but I've seen young girls living through Snapchat & other apps, vehemently photographing themselves and everything around them. To me, it seems as if they care more about how they portray themselves online towards others (they don't even know), instead of enjoying the actual experiences.
Putting up with b******t you know isn't ok. We all do this but as 40 something it's painful to watch young women continue to just stay in abusive or even just frustrating imbalanced relationships. Realize your worth ladies..sooner than later.
This isn't something new. Women have endured this generation after f*****g generation. But it's true that we keep hoping the new generation will be stronger.
They have endured terrible marriages through the years, but nowadays they should have the ability to leave.
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I've stopped meddling and caring. As long as I know there isn't violence going on and children aren't involved, I just leave it up to the couple to figure it out. Otherwise you'll end up putting yourself in the middle of their fuckery and no one's got time for that.
Can I add a corollary, "he said he loves me and he's sorry ". Get out!
Being on an abusive relationship can be like you are in ' the eye of the storm'. It seems normal, it seems OK...if you know someone in one who hasn't worked it out, let them know you are worried for them, and you will be there when they need you, and let them know that whenever it is appropriate....not every time you see them, it becomes a broken record, but here and there. Hopefully it it rhe gentle beginning of the storm when they realise, sadly more often it is not. Been there, love and support got me out
heh me...I have a friendship...She hits me all the time and I just deal with it. Keep your head down and blend in. Am I right??
No hon. This person is NOT your friend, and I think you know this. It doesn't matter what pretty words someone says, if they hit you, you need to get away from them. You deserve better. You are worthy of kindness and respect.
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Glorifying submissive misogynistic gender roles, trying to codify it into law, and shaming others who exercise and defend their rights to choose something else for their life.
Wait, what submissive misogynistic gender roles are young women trying to get codified into law?
Van life.
The whole "Van life is so glamorous, look at me sipping my coffee sitting in the back of my van in front of the sunrise" thing is WAY overrated and very, very fake. Van life or camper life can be fun and an adventure at times, yes - but it comes with a LOT of work, expense and risk that people don't tell you about.
I think people glamorize van-life because it's what they can afford. If I couldn't afford to own or rent a house/apartment, I'd be living in my car. If I could afford an upgrade, I'd buy a van. Van-life is popular because it's an affordable alternative to renting an apartment.
Focusing on their social media appearance. The lighting, the posing…it’s all for likes.
Posting where they are. Where they go.
The complete transparency over their location floors me after being told not to tell people that stuff online.
I worry that a lot of young people are too aware of their social media standing and appearance and aesthetic and are forgetting to find and love themselves for who they are.
Botox in their early 20s. There's nothing there. What wrinkles are you trying to fix?
Buccal fat removal surgery.
I never heard it of it, so googled, wish I didn't as I shouted WHYYY??? and woke my cat up
Low-rise jeans.
Don’t do it, kids! Learn from our mistakes!
I like it TBH. I hate highrises, they make you look like you have a huge a*s and a fat stomach.
I am annoyed by the 90s high-water jeans paired with the ugliest sneakers ever. I have never understood fashion because I come from a poor family and I wore what my parents could afford to buy me. This included jeans that eventually were too short for me. I was bullied for my short pants.
But now everyone wants mom jeans. They are hideous and unflattering.
Not wearing sunscreen and still going tanning.
My sister died at age 36 from skin cancer and it is still a struggle to convince younger girls of all ethnicities to wear sunscreen and stop tanning. Use a fake tanner or/and love the skin you're in.
I'm definitely not considered older woman yet, so J apologise as my view may not count but one thing I've noticed since starting a new job and working with some 17-20 year olds has given me a few yikes
One is the weird obsession with knowing where their partners is at all times, one girl threw a mini fit because her partners Snapchat location wasn't on and she was scarily angry about it
And the weird glorification I've seen about being 'psycho' is such a weird red flag. Amount of them boasting about borderline mentally abusive things or acts they do to their partners is f*****g WILD and frankly scares me a little
A long time ago I had a bf's location because I didn't trust him. Checking his location became obsession like to me. I finally learned that if I have the need for it I need to reevaluate our relationship. I tell my 19 y/o the same thing.
I am 50. I am actually amazed by young women's self confidence. So many of the amazing young adults I meet through my kids just scream self confidence. I still feel insecure at 50. Maybe it is because since they could be online everyone had an opinion on them and they had to learn just not to care. But so many of them, even if it is not there fake that self confidence.
I have said I wanted to be my middle child when I grew up her whole life. She is just fierce. She makes no excuses for who she is. She is amazing. And her life is not always easy. She just handles the world like it is hers to be handled. And I watch the same thing from her brother, her sister and about every one they know. They kind of give me hope the world is getting better.
I was laughing at my 12 yo great niece. I have taken care of her since she was 9 months old. She does competition cheer. But the faces she makes. Wow. Straight fierce. That's what I wanna be when I grow up.
I think the confidence thing with your kids says a lot about you as a parent too. We tend to surround ourselves with people who are similar to us as well. I see this as a good job!
There seems to be a hype culture about being a stripper or selling pics of one's feet on the Internet. 14 year olds are discussing how to best get a sugar daddy. Weird. And scary.
This is real small, and makes me feel real ancient, but pulling their bathing suits up their butt cracks. It just looks SO uncomfortable to me, but y’all do you. I’ll sit over in my full coverage, granny bathing suit that’s probably ugly, but I’ll be comfy 😂
Knee length boardies and a rashie top for me. The UV rays here in Australia are insane. Slip slop slap
Passive aggressive roommate fights.
The layers can get really impressive, but in a terrible way. "A wrote B a note about dishes but C thought it was about them so C wrote A a note then B came home and thought it was for her so she texted the group chat and..."
DUDE. TALK TO PEOPLE. TALK. TO. PEOPLE. This is the perfect time in your life to be practicing assertiveness and healthy conflict resolution. All this s****y note-writing and vague group text chatting and b******t is making whatever the problem is a thousand times worse.
YES. Talk to the other humans. "Uh, just text me" - no, you isolated little bridge troll, I won't. This situation requires an actual conversation. Learn to deal with it.
Being so awesomely confident in their bodies that they wear whatever they want.
I was taught to hide my flaws so I am puzzled, and proud, of them for loving themselves amidst the societal pressure to conform.
I've learned this adopted this and love this..... OMG no more body issues
Letting everyone on the internet knowing exactly whare you are at all times and what your schedule is seems a bit nuts.
Watch the movie The Bling Ring. That's how ALL those stars got robbed. Paris Hilton almost lost her dog. Orlando Bloom never got his vintage watches back.
Wearing crop tops and loungewear to restaurants, stores and other public places that aren't gyms. I don't understand the just rolled out of bed look.
Background: I’m 40, so an older millennial, and one thing I’ve noticed in the workplace is how damn impressed boomers are with excellent Excel skills. It’s something I’ve always laughed about because it’s such a basic skill and older folks always fawn all over my excel sheets.
Then we got a Gen Z employee who simply said she could quickly code a program in an afternoon to meet several of the needs that our excel sheets were meeting.
Even as someone who has some basic understanding and experience of Stata and R Studio (just a couple of grad level courses for non practitioners) I have no idea what the f**k she did or how she did it. She just laughed at my awe.
I am now becoming that person who is impressed with skills that the next generation finds very basic.
edit: wow, reading through this thread is like a primer on internalized misogyny. I’m really saddened by all the older women who are expressing displeasure about young women’s bodies and looks. Just let them be, for f**k’s sake, and try to teach them what you’ve learned and learn what you don’t understand from them.
we're running into almost the opposite- we need people with basic computer skills but because people are being raised on phones and not using PC's, we get people who don't know how to cut & paste, don't know how to navigate multiple windows, don't even know how to type. they are geniuses with their phones, but put them on a PC and they're totally lost.
Putting up with s**t partners. When I was in my 20s, I dated around. Guy got too aggressive? Dump. Tried to change me? Dump. Lied? Dump. Married 20 years now, because I waited to find a good one.
Stop asking how to change him or yourself. Dump and move on.
No, maybe you have toxic personality traits and you DO need to change. I'm dating someone right now with this problem. She thinks she's perfect and wonderful but she's the filthiest laziest person I have ever met. And when I criticise her she cries about it. It's unacceptable. Learn to take criticism if it is correct, objective, and factual.
Sending nudes to men they're not dating. "Talking" to guys...just go on a few dates and decide if you want a relationship for gods sake. All this "we've been talking for a few months now" is weird
Yeah.... But that goes both ways..... No more d pix unless we ask.... We know what it looks like... Cool you're a boy
Not appreciating how feminism has improved all of society’s choices (not just women's) and not standing in support of the continuing work.
Young conservative women - just, why?
E: Correction. Thanks for the gold!
I never understand a woman or black person who votes Republican, it's like... do you have stockholm syndrome? These people would like you back in the kitchen and cotton fields. VOTE THEM OUT EVERY TIME.
I don't know how common it is, but I see a lot of posts on Reddit from women who live with deadbeat partners who play video games all day and smoke weed. They may work a bit or not, but the women are largely responsible for their financial situation. Why would women who make enough money to support themselves alone subject themselves to that?
AGREED! Though I'm starting the think they seek these relationships out for the "martyr clout" on social media
Not using barrier birth control is another.
I don't understand why girls want to inflate their lips. Also girls with pointy long fingernails who have babies. I remember having an aunty with long fingernails and I used to hate holding her hand when I was tiny.
The whole eyebrow thing.
Wearing the awful, unflattering mom jeans that MY deeply unstylish 1980s mother looked frumpy in.
Well done makeup including contouring. I am an old hag and NEVER mastered the art and now it seems like everyone is able to do it and no matter what I still look like a rodeo clown if I try. Young women who are into it seem to watch a couple of videos and become total artists. Beginner tutorial: find the right shade… Aaaaand I’m done.
I didn't learn until my 20s; I went to the makeup counter at the military exchange and the gal working there basically taught me how to choose shades/colors, how to apply them, etc. We're still friends years later :)
The performative nature of everything. Ask someone to a dance? Have signs and cameras filming and gifts….they film everything. It’s insane. There’s no concept of privacy or events being just for them and their loved one(s). It’s like it’s all a movie or play put on for the world to see 100% of the time. They don’t seem to live their lives for themselves but for followers. It’s really sad.
All the dancing and celebrity-impersonation on Instagram and TikTok.
It’s as if they’ll disappear into oblivion if they don’t follow the ongoing trends.
It is active, it is creative and it is exactly what we did in the 80's/90's.
Sending nudes to a guy online or sending him texts/DM's revealing intimate information they don't even know simply because the guy asked. Don't do it! There are so many male influencers and social media "stars" being exposed as creeps for getting young women to send nudes or mention personal info and then doxxing them or doing revenge porn.
arrestable offence in my country. Speak to your senator and get it banned.
Dating apps, wanting a relationship but feeling obligated to have sex quickly ("because how else will you get to know each other and be in a relationship"), and lip fillers just hardly ever look good. Oh, and the flaired pants being back in, especially when it's just like a black legging material and the bottoms are fraying from dragging on the floor, reminds me of when I was a dorky 13 year old
Meh to complaining about easy sex. Sex isn't a big deal unless you're a far-right christian Handmaid. F**k that. If you want to have sex go ahead. Really this stigmatisation is so medieval it is scary.
Following people on social media that just make them feel bad about themselves. Comparing yourself to a highly curated & filtered persona is so damaging to self-esteem.
Giving too much information out.
I notice a lot of younger women are more lenient about being disrespected by their partners. Accepting it as a person just telling their TRUTH, however not understanding a person can be truthful without being an A-hole
Speaking with vocal fry, whether entirely or using it to finish every sentence. To be fair, not just women do this, but it does seem to be related to age and/or social media consumption.
Hold on to men that use them and want nothing to do with them. They stay in dead end relationships with men that have nothing and will never give them anything
Why do we pit one group of women against another like this? We don't have articles about why younger men think older men are horrible, do we?
I think you may be reading this wrong. Most of these posts that weren't light-hearted were people worrying about the younger women, not criticizing or judging them.
Load More Replies... each generation has its thing. Internalised misogyny is a thing. Stop hating women for doing what they want to do. As long as they are not voluntarily submitting themselves to Republicans/Taliban/Gender Based Violence, it's fine.
I couldn't stand the whole post. A lot of these comments are rude, misogynistic and feel a little angry
Young women don't puzzle me? I'm 50 and each generation is different and unique. I think young women today need all the support they can get from us older women. We must all have each others back and not criticise. For all you younger ladies, you are inspirational, amazing and you just be you. Women of all ages rule.
It just sounds like women are hating on other women for no reason. Maybe mind your own business?
I think you may be reading this wrong. Most of these posts that weren't light-hearted were people worrying about the younger women, not criticizing or judging them.
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Girls doing tik toks of rants or some nonsense while putting makeup on.
Why do we pit one group of women against another like this? We don't have articles about why younger men think older men are horrible, do we?
I think you may be reading this wrong. Most of these posts that weren't light-hearted were people worrying about the younger women, not criticizing or judging them.
Load More Replies... each generation has its thing. Internalised misogyny is a thing. Stop hating women for doing what they want to do. As long as they are not voluntarily submitting themselves to Republicans/Taliban/Gender Based Violence, it's fine.
I couldn't stand the whole post. A lot of these comments are rude, misogynistic and feel a little angry
Young women don't puzzle me? I'm 50 and each generation is different and unique. I think young women today need all the support they can get from us older women. We must all have each others back and not criticise. For all you younger ladies, you are inspirational, amazing and you just be you. Women of all ages rule.
It just sounds like women are hating on other women for no reason. Maybe mind your own business?
I think you may be reading this wrong. Most of these posts that weren't light-hearted were people worrying about the younger women, not criticizing or judging them.
Load More Replies... Girls doing tik toks of rants or some nonsense while putting makeup on.
