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“I’ve Cremated All My Relatives Against Their Wishes”: 40 Dark Secrets People Are Keeping
Interview
Truth or dare. Truth? Okay, tell me your deepest, darkest secret!
I remember sweating through every middle school party praying that I wouldn’t be asked to reveal anything too embarrassing or life-altering. In hindsight, I’m not sure what I was so scared of because 12-year-old me didn't have any juicy secrets.
I have since learned, however, that many people in this world actually do cling onto deep, dark secrets, some of which have recently been revealed on Reddit. Below, you’ll find a variety of shocking admissions, as well as conversations with the woman who started this conversation and the hosts of the Deep Dark Secrets podcast. So get out your popcorn, enjoy reading through, and be sure to upvote the secrets you’re glad aren’t your own!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
I was pregnant at 18 by my father. No one in my life knows. I moved away. I went into labour at 37 weeks. She was perfect. She just didn't breathe. They tried for ages. In the end, they put her in my arms and said there was nothing they could do. Throughout my whole pregnancy, I wondered how I could possibly love her given how she came to be. I was so alone and confused. I wished her away on more than one occasion, and then it happened. It hurts, so very much every day. It's been 29 years, and it still hurts every day. I've never had another child. It's the price I pay for wishing her away.
over it already 2 years ago
Bless your heart. You didn't cause that. I'm so sorry for every single little piece of this story.
Lea Panthera 2 years ago
Me too. That's terrible. I hope the rest of OP's life is as wonderful as her past wasn't. Also her father should go rot in the underworld.
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Mochi 2 years ago
It was never your fault. You were just a kid, you were scared, you clearly didn't have the best home environment, and you couldn't take care of a child. It was never your fault. I have never had a child or lost one, so I don't know the pain or grief, but I do know this, it was never your fault.
Zophra 2 years ago
You are kind, but this is a repost from Reddit and the OP will not see it here. However, perhaps someone else reading will need your encouragement.
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TonyTee 2 years ago
A man like that is the reason for Birth Control. A father like that should have his d**k chopped off, shoved up his a*s, then shoved down his throat.
LoonTunes 2 years ago
I'd love the pleasure and feel honored to be the one to carry out this sentence.
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Loverboy 2 years ago
You were going through something no one should ever in their life have to go through. It wasn't your fault. There was no price to pay, hon. You were so very hurt and confused, on your own. Anyone would have had the same thoughts and it would've been completely understandable.
Shannon Donnelly 2 years ago
Miscarriages and stillborn births don't happen because one wishes them away. You bear zero guilt for anything that took place at any point during this traumatic period in your life. I hope you have gotten some therapy since then and if not, please consider doing so. You deserve to have a wonderful life. Love and blessings to you.
Alisa LaVine 2 years ago
No amount of wishing her away caused this. It's more likely that you and your father's genetics were too familial to produce a viable child.
RELATED:
#2
I inherited a butt ton of money and haven't told anyone for years. I have lived very modestly but one day I plan on completely disappearing to my countryside house where no one will find me.
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
That is smart. If I ever came into money or won the lottery I would stay anonymous and not change roo much about the way I live now except move away and buy a house
Tee Rat 2 years ago
In my state you can't remain anonymous after winning the lottery. I'm not too worried about it though. Now, if I inherited money nobody would find out.
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Tee Rat 2 years ago
Depends on whether it's coins, paper, or plastic. And of course how much they can stuff in there.
Load More Replies... TonyTee 2 years ago (edited)
He’s better off, in this day and age greedy and entitled people are becoming more and more a common thing, and while no one found out about his inheritance yet, he might wanna move out and live far away from everyone before they do find out he’s got money and they swoop in like vultures
Nancy Marine 2 years ago
This is the smartest thing anyone can do when you get a lot of money. Money changes the people around you and they'll always have their hand out. If I ever won the lottery or came into a lot of money, I would tell my sisters because they wouldn't care. I wouldn't tell anyone else, though. I wouldn't change my standard of living, I'd just travel more.
To learn more about how this conversation started in the first place, we reached out to Reddit user AaneMeg, who posed the question, “What is your darkest secret?” She was kind enough to have a chat with us about what inspired her to ask about others’ secrets. “I believe Reddit is a very safe place to anonymously share something that you are not comfortable sharing with your face on it,” the OP shared.
“Most of us, if not all, have something which we are not comfortable letting the world know about, something that we have kept locked deep down,” AaneMeg continued. “But those secrets are also something that bother us. We are social beings and we like to share. We like to gossip. Sharing makes us feel light. So, the idea behind this question was to give people a platform to share that suppressed feeling and maybe feel a little better about themselves.”
#3
I love my dogs more than I love my close family and I prefer to spend time with my dogs instead of my family
heather morris 2 years ago
I jate to admit this but my dog and mom died within a week of each other and I miss my dog more.
sturmwesen 2 years ago
You are not alone. My mom died and I could not cry or grieve and went back to ny uni finals. My soul dog died and I was a mess for months. There is no grief shaming.
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#4
My mum was/is an alcoholic with schizophrenia. She was pretty abusive to my dad and me. My dad died from terminal cancer but once when he was ill when I was 18 I came downstairs after hearing shouting to see him sobbing on the floor begging her to stop screaming at him. It was only the 2nd time I'd ever seen my dad cry, all the abuse and I'd never seen him breakdown. Something snapped and lets just say I got physical with her which culminated in me whispering in her ear that if she so much as raised her voice at him again she'd leave in a body bag. I think she knew I was serious as she cut most of her s**t out.
Loverboy 2 years ago
I'm sorry you and your dad had to go through that abuse for so long. Her mental conditions don't justify that. You did what every child with an abusive parent wishes they could say/do when something like that is happening.
Lea Panthera 2 years ago
Good on you for standing up for your father. I love the two of you already.
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Jill Rhodry 2 years ago
I dunno, schizophrenia doesn't work like that - there'd be a lot less trauma for them if it did.
Shannon Donnelly 2 years ago
Schizophrenia doesn't usually work like that, but alcoholism does. I can't imagine the toxic mix of the two. That being said, that's not an excuse for behavior AT ALL. Both are diseases that can be treated and it's the responsibility of the affected individual to get that treatment.
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Brian Droste 2 years ago
Most of the time you hear about the husband/father doing something like this. Not the wife/mother being abusive even thou that does occur.
Beverly Lodge 2 years ago
Holy smokes, that's so awful you had to do that. Btw to EVERYONE - men experience domestic shiz too. It's real, it happens and this is a perfect example for this, just saying. It's not a 'bitxhes be crazy ' thing, it's a legit environment where a lot of stuff is involved and guys don't reach out for help because they are almost laughed at - still. It's kinda effed
Janet Howe 2 years ago
That was a pretty tough thing to go thru for both you and your dad. But you had reached your breaking point. I don't condone the physical part of what you did, but I understand it totally. But the result of that did get her to stop most of the abuse. She really needed professional help.
We also asked the OP if she could share any of her own secrets with us. “This is a dark secret that I haven't shared with anyone yet: I hate my father and the sole reason for that is his indefinitely towards my mother,” she told Bored Panda. “He has cheated on her on multiple occasions and he doesn't feel remorse. I look after him and my mother, as they are old now, but deep inside, I hate him like hell.”
And while AaneMeg says not everyone has a dark secret, she believes that most of us certainly do. “Our dark secrets are not always bad, or embarrassing, or even criminal. It's just something that we are not comfortable sharing, maybe because of our cultural upbringing, our morals, and our personality,” she noted. “And I believe most of us have at least something like that which we don't feel comfortable talking about.”
#5
I got my first bf when I was 19. He was also 19. The relationship was incredibly toxic and abusive --the level of "I'm not allowed to pick my clothes or friends or classes without his consent" kind of abusive. Later on, he would throw furniture at me, try to break my arm with his bare hands, threaten to kill himself if I left, kidnap my dog, and stand in front of my car so I couldn't leave. I was trapped for 2.5 years. During that time, I was falsely accused of having a sexual relationship with my co-coach who was 45 at the time, when in reality, my bf was cheating on me. So when he wanted to lose weight, I told him I would cook for him. What he thought were healthy, chocolate protein shakes were actually full fat, chocolate shakes with about a cup of added sugar per serving (plus protein powder). He gained 40+ lbs over a year. I want to feel bad about it but I had to call the cops on him for domestic abuse. So I don't.
Saint_Zipcodus 2 years ago
So happy that you got rid of this deplorable waste of perfectly good carbon. Many of us had to go though similar phases. It's a best case scenario if we emerge on the other side relatively unscathed and with some importand lessons learnd. You go, friend!
CHRISTY SMITH 2 years ago
Two things: 1) that is absolutely hilarious and 2) weren’t you afraid when he started gaining weight? I’d be afraid he would blame me and therefore the abuse would get even worse.
Kerry Borthwick 2 years ago
Hun I was abused to point he tried to kill me and even paid a mate to rape me I got my own bk by my knight in shining armour took me from him 13 yes and 2 kids later I feel loved
#6
My dad was an awful d******d, so when I was 16 I reported his endless list of s**t to the police. To this day he thinks his ex-wife snitched on him. He still doesn't know that his daughter reported him. -Edit: So many were asking what he did, and if he was sentenced. I won't list everything, some are scattered in the comments, but here are a few (a lot of then I will keyword because I can't bring myself to actually go into detail, I hope you understand) "Accidental" vehicular homicide; child kidnapping (he forced me and my sister to move to a different country away from out family); forcing me and my sister to work on our "family" restaurant for no money, 10hrs a day; tax evasion; scamming over 250k, grooming, overstepping child/father boundaries (i won't go into detail. I'm sorry.) For this he got 23 years without parole
Boo-Urns 2 years ago
> d******d ______________ I really don't know why I bother with this stupid site and all of their senseless censoring. I have no F*****K I N G clue what this word is.
We were also curious what the OP thought about the responses to her post. “I was surprised by some, laughed my heart out on a few, and was completely horrified by others. It was a mixed bag,” she shared, noting that it’s too difficult to choose one that was her favorite.
“But there was a comment where a person had accidentally mixed up all the ashes of dead people in multiple urns and scooped them from the floor,” AaneMeg noted. “Then just randomly placed those ashes in the urns and didn't talk about it. I was really interested in that post and also concerned about those urns and their contents. From where I come, the remains of our dead ones are taken very seriously. We hold it very sacred. If something like this happened and we came to know about it, we would be pretty disheartened. We forever would be feeling that we didn't send off our beloved person with love.”
#7
I ran over a woman as she was crossing the road with her child when I was 18 years old. They both died. It was 5 am and foggy and I did not see them.
There is not a day that goes by that I do not hear the noise and remember the smell and it has been nearly 34 years. I don't share this with people but I live with the fact that I ruined a family each and every day.
Lea Panthera 2 years ago
I'm sorry. It was clearly an accident that could've happened to anyone, but I'm sorry it even happened.
Load More Replies... Shannon Donnelly 2 years ago
We live in such a litigious country at this point that we tend to forget that true accidents happen- where no one is at fault, it's just a horrible tragedy that took place. Yes, clearly the family that lost the two people are devastated, but the driver didn't do anything wrong or illegal that caused the accident. It must be absolutely brutal to carry around that guilt every day.
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
And it's horrible that when people are involved in things like this, they are advised by attorneys to not even say "I'm sorry" because they say it indicates guilt. But it doesn't and they should be able to express their sympathy.
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TonyTee 2 years ago
Situation sucks all around. That’s a kind of pain I wouldn’t be able to handle, let alone for over 30 years. Just the fact you have this regret and pain shows you were, and are, a good person who’s genuine. May you find peace one day. And may those poor souls Rest in Peace. 🙏
My “in my head” Voice 2 years ago
Did you own up to it or did you run? Makes a big difference about how I feel about this.
Teresa Chason 2 years ago
That's what I want to know. Like, it may have been a horrible accident but if you just took off without even stoping to help them then that make a HUGE difference.
Load More Replies... #8
I called dcyf on a friend and her kids eventually were removed from her home. Still doesn't know it was me.
ThatBlackNightingale 2 years ago
Department of Children, Youth, and Families.
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Brocken Blue 2 years ago
Because you can love a person who is going through hard times. The children might have been unsafe due to an alcohol or drug addiction. Reason enough to call child services, not reason enough to abandon somebody while they are down
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StrangeOne 2 years ago
I read the posts on Reddit, OP said down the line that they weren't the only ones to call child services. Others have called police and child services many times. So, the OP is confident the culprit is not obvious. The kids were given to their grandparents, who are not on talking terms with the kid's parents. The parents are not actively trying to improve their situation to get their kids back.
Nadine Bamberger 2 years ago
You did the right thing if the kids were in danger, I wish more people would be that brave.
The OP also shared that some posts discussing family issues were relatable to her. “I found many people in my situation,” she told Bored Panda. “Until now, I thought I was the only one struggling in that aspect. But there are hundreds of people like me, and weirdly enough, it made me feel better.”
“All of us are entitled to keep secrets,” AaneMeg added. “Sure, some of those secrets can be pretty damning, but not keeping one is a sure shot to feeling transparent or feeling judged. So, yeah, in my opinion, I think it is a pretty healthy thing to do. Of course, only if you are comfortable doing that.”
#9
I’m a 36 year old straight bearded man. I love Sailor Moon. Nostalgic af and I’m emabarassed by it.
Lea Panthera 2 years ago (edited)
I'm an Indian girl with glasses, straight hair pulled back almost all the time, and a stern resting expression. I am also in a hate-love relationship with Miraculous Ladybug, although I deny it when confronted.
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XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧 2 years ago
I hope one day you get the courage to say f**k it! My partner is a 38m that has zero shame in rocking a Barbie tshirt he stole from me. It's hot pink and has a black Barbie on the front & says " She's Dynamite!" in glitter. Life's too short, so thoroughly enjoy all the fun bits😁❤️
Francisco Peralta 2 years ago
I am a 45 years old straight bearded man who also loves Sailor Moon, and make no secret about it.
Dawnyducks 2 years ago
It’s ok. You’re a 90’s kid friend! No one can ever top sailor moon. We all know that.
Elio 2 years ago
Sailor Moon is awesome. I've been buying the remastered Blu Rays from Viz. And I might have a few posters in my apartment. If any dates have a problem with it, then it's like sorry but Usagi was in my life before you.
StrangeOne 2 years ago
Never change or hide your life from anyone. Not worth it. The DVDs are expensive af but still worth it. They're getting hard to find in the store. When I check online they're mostly bootleg, as the reviews state. I just need Season 2 part 2, Season 3 part 2 and Season 4 part 1.
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#10
When I was 33, my father died. My mother had passed a year earlier. A few days after his death I was in his closet just looking at stuff, thinking about what to do with everything. I saw an old jacket that I had never seen my father west. I tried it on but it was way too small. That means it would’ve been too small for my dad too. I put my hand in the inside pocket and found a roll of $20 bills. $680 total. Then I reached in the other pocket and found a note with a life insurance policy number and a name and phone number. My father told me he didn’t have life insurance before he passed so I wondered if it was an old policy. I called the number, and it was the agent that sold him the policy. He told me there were three benificiarirs and it’s still valid. It was worth 300,00$ to be split equally three ways between my brother, me and Valeria. I have no idea who Valeria is. I took my 100k my bro got his 100k and I guess Valeria got hers. I like to think she was a beautiful women that rocked my dads world in his final year on earth
Funhog 2 years ago
Valeria probably did not receive her proceeds from OP's father's life insurance because life insurance companies do not track down beneficiaries of life insurance policies. This was the responsibility of the executor/executrix of OP's father's estate.
Pandapoo 2 years ago
As far as I know, named beneficiaries of life insurance and investment accounts are handled separate from the estate.
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Tessa 2 years ago
Same! I would be scared, but would try and find out who she is.
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To learn more about the dark secrets people hold onto, we also reached out to a couple of experts on the topic, hosts of the Deep Dark Secrets Podcast, LaDonna and Alecia. “I believe everyone has (or has had) a dark secret at some point in their life,” LaDonna shared, noting that she believes it’s unhealthy to keep deep dark secrets. “In my opinion, those kinds of secrets create a state of stress and anxiety and leave you feeling either depressed, anxious, or overly negative.”
“I believe everybody has secrets, and a select few people have truly dark secrets,” Alecia chimed in. “I believe that what most people would label a ‘dark’ secret is probably just something that brings them shame. Like when you have lied about something, or you have a flaw or shortcoming that you'd rather not discuss with others. To me, a secret isn't truly dark unless it has to do with harming another person.”
#11
Male.
I've been selling my foot pics and videos pretending to be female for years.
moon_magic 2 years ago
I wish all guys took as much care of their feet as this guy must. Poor grooming is such a turn off.
Load More Replies... Earthquake903 2 years ago
Get that money bro! Who cares if you're a dude. You're not hurting anyone
Duckie Measles 2 years ago
I'm female with humongous manly Fred Flintstone feet. I think our feet must've been switched at the human factory.
Danger Bunny (She/Her) 2 years ago (edited)
Same , my feet look like a gorrila's
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#12
My wife thinks I take super long showers because I'm jerking off. I'm not (usually). Most of the time I'm sitting in a cold shower trying to wash off my anxiety. Doesn't usually work.
Blue Cicada 2 years ago
Good for you for trying to alleviate the anxiety flare ups. Please be honest with her about your struggles (unless she contributes to the anxiety). Please share these symptoms with your doctor. You are strong enough to manage your health.
Bob Brooce 2 years ago
Of course it doesn't work. You need hot water and really good soap to wash off anxiety. In all seriousness, I find a long hot shower to be very therapeutic just in general.
Sheri Carlson Peck 2 years ago
You should be honest about your anxiety. There is help out there.
PunkRock*Bottom* 2 years ago
Ice cubes in my mouth and icepacks on my head work for my panic attacks
Marilyn Russell 2 years ago
Actually cold showers should help relieve anxiety by toning the vagus nerve. Deep breathing exercises and yoga also help to calm down the nervous system, as well as adrenal support supplements and magnesium. Helped reduce my anxiety and relieve the concomitant insomnia.
We were also curious what kinds of dark secrets get revealed on LaDonna and Alecia’s show. “Our podcast shines a light in some very dark places,” LaDonna told Bored Panda. “Our first season is covering the world of death fetish forums and related murders. Honestly, I think the entire season (every episode) is shocking. We are covering stories about (primarily) men who glorify the abduction, torture, rape and murder of young women. All of the stories are horrific, but I find the stories about necrophilia and cannibalism among the most shocking. My favorite kind of story this season is when the bad guy (a death fetish predator) is arrested and convicted for his heinous crimes.”
#13
Not so much now, but when I was younger, I wished that my severely disabled little brother was never born/normal. I love my little brother, I really do and I feel awful that I have these thoughts. But the way he is completely altered my life and my entire family. He will always need to be taken care of and all plans must work around him. When my parents pass, it will be my sister and I who take care of him. It's not his fault but I would sometimes resent him. Never told anyone because of the guilt I feel.
John Topper 2 years ago
You have nothing to feel guilty about. Every single person who cares for a disabled kid feels this way. Who has ever said "yeah, I want a kid, but I want it to be 10x more stressful, 1/10th as rewarding, and never ending"?
Gin 2 years ago
A friend of mine does over her son. She does her absolute best to get him everything he needs and there isn't a fight that she wouldn't take up for him but, yes, she does feel like that.
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Elaine Morinelli 2 years ago
Actually this is pretty common. I have several friends in this situation and they are haunted by the knowledge that they have to take care of their disabled sibling.
Benita Valdez 2 years ago
My dear friend, you are not alone at all. I am in the exact same boat except I'm already at the part of being care taker. It's rough but if you can maintain a good relationship with your other sibling then it's a lot easier take care of them together. Just don't beat yourself up over those feelings; they're normal when you're in this situation.
Mason Denton 2 years ago
You are valid in those feelings. I’m pretty sure feeling two conflicting things is worse than feeling nothing. The best. I wish you the best.
Smiley MG 2 years ago
That's why abortion should be legal. If the fetus in womb is found not healthy or such, which is possible in few but nonetheless cases..... The siblings life will be ruined who didn't ask for this extra burden and guilt...
iMOGENE CARGO 2 years ago
Not to mention the quality of life for that child. Yes, every one deserves the right to live. But the woman who is carrying that fetus & who will be responsible for that fetus should have the right to decide how it affects her life. Whether it's by aborting it, raising it, putting it up for adoption etc. it should be nobody else's choice but her own. I'm sorry but if I find out my fetus is going to turn into a child that is essentially a vegetable that will never be able to process love or give love or ever have autonomy or ever even have a fulfilling life... why would I bring that person into the world? Especially when it's not going to Benefit my family.. it would actually do the opposite.. it will hurt everyone else in my family & that kid would never know the difference... the merciful thing to do would be to abort it. F**k you anti choice people.
Load More Replies... #14
I feel nothing. Always. Every emotion is faked. The “love” for my wife, the “love” for my kids. The “caring” about my friends. The ”effort” I put in at my my place of employment as a supervisor. It’s all to fit in. It’s all a show. Of course, they all will never know that. Ever. Especially my family. I would never leave them or want them to know my lack of feelings because I know it would crush them. So every day, I keep on keeping on.
Gabriele Alfredo Pini 2 years ago
"because I know it would crush them." Said everything: you love them, only in your own way. Sentiments are complicated and each of us experiment them in different ways
SheHulk 2 years ago
If he really didn´t feel anything he wouldn't care about hurting them.
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Em 2 years ago
There is a difference between not caring and actively wishing someone harm.
Load More Replies... raigrant01 2 years ago
Exactly. This person has morals, even if they can't feel. As with all mental health issues (and I have a few), it's a reason, not an excuse. Good on them for actually being bothered and not just accepting their lack of feelings. I wish them well.
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Mochi 2 years ago
I'm upvoting because I was there. It gets better. You should stop the show, come clean. Why would it crush them? If you are struggling, they will help you.
Em 2 years ago
You weren't there. You don't know this person. You have no idea what their life is like. You appear to be projecting your own experiences onto them. Nowhere did they say that they were struggling or wanting things to get better. That might be the case, or it might not. To me this reads more like someone at peace with who they are and the unusual way their brain works, but hey, I might be projecting as well. Who knows.
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Loverboy 2 years ago
Oh honey. I've been there. I am there. If it's because of depression then you should really tell them, they would only want to help. Though I can't really be speaking.
XenoMurph 2 years ago
Sorry mate but the fact that you don't say it, or leave, means you DO feel love. Sounds like depression that you can't embrace that and enjoy it. Get treatment,therapy, it really works.
Mary Lou 2 years ago
It sounds like depersonalisation. That can be a primary diagnosis or a symptom of depression or other problems. Instead of keeping on I hope OP seeks support. To be able to find real joy and truely feel the love in their life!
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Alisa LaVine 2 years ago
You may have Antisocial personality disorder. Most people with APD are not serial killers. Like 99%.
Mary Lou 2 years ago (edited)
No. Please stop giving out crass google diagnosis. Sincerely, a studied psychologist.
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Id row 2 years ago
But if someone feels that way, why get married and have kids? For what purpose? Isn't it exhausting pretending you care about those people? If that was me, I'd feel much more at ease by myself. I wouldn't have to expend the energy to keep up the charade all the time.
sturmwesen 2 years ago
Safety, fullfilling from expectations, the wish to feel "normal".
Load More Replies...“Our podcast, Deep Dark Secrets, covers the most depraved secrets of humanity,” Alecia shared. “We are currently focused on an online community in the deep and dark web that gain sexual gratification from watching women be raped, abused, tortured, and murdered. Much like the reddit thread you had referenced, there are thousands of people, mostly men, online who are sexually aroused by the idea of killing a woman, and having control of her corpse. I find this fetish/obsession to be extremely shocking and disturbing.”
#15
How many times a day that I wish I would die. Depression is a absolute c**t. I am fairly certain that a medication I took for 6 months about 12 years ago is responsible. Don't sic the admins on me. I keep on keeping on . My survival rate for my bad days is 100% Edit. The Medication was Chantix. And Wow the support I have gotten. Thank you and I love you.
over it already 2 years ago
Chantix really does screw with your brain. The dreams are wild. I was warned and prepared and still made me feel crazy for a bit.
Shankshaw Redeemer 2 years ago
I had extremely vivid sex dreams. The sex was always in public places where tons of people could see me and whomever, like in a stadium full of people at a college football game. Wild!
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Sarah Luna 2 years ago
My husband took Chantix and it...made him stop smoking. Thought I'd try it and I burned all his things and asked for a divorce. But the scariest part is that I have no memory of it or of anything that happened during that time.
ScootyPuffJr 2 years ago
My ex was on Chantix and it made him start talking angrily in his sleep. He'd snooze and start yelling stuff like, "Stop putting f'ing butter in my mouth," and "I thought we were talking about push lawnmowers!" Unfortunately, it also made his depression worse. I told him I'd rather have him smoking than depressed.
XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧 2 years ago
100% believe it could be from Chantix. During vet school, a girl I was interning with went on Chantix. Perfectly normal to bat s**t crazy in the span of a year and is bat s**t crazy to this day.
Dim T 2 years ago
Medication doesn’t work like that, there's no magic pill that'll make you crazy. Something might have terrible side effects but it doesn’t just make one crazy and it doesn’t linger after you stop taking it forever
Load More Replies... David Paterson 2 years ago
I had to look up Chantix on the web. "A 2013 Cochrane overview and network meta-analysis concluded that Chantix is the most effective medication for tobacco cessation". Side effects in Wikipedia are fairly mild. It does act as an antidepressant. It would mess with your brain.
Rhys 2 years ago
Yeah I was not prepared for the utter desolation of joy that is champix. Horrible vivid nightmares and just constant suffocating dangerous ideation when awake. Smoking was less risky tbh. That said, I quit smoking when I heard I was to become a father and after many, many failed attempts at quitting this time was is relatively easy. And my son, bless his cotton socks, fills my days with immense happiness.
Elio 2 years ago
A guy my mom worked with had a total personality transplant when he was on Chantix. He went from being a friendly person to a very irritable and mean person. Even started getting into bar fights. He almost got fired because of it and is really lucky he didn't end up getting an assault charge.
Plebbit 2 years ago
Yes! Angry. It made me angry. So irritated at every little thing. It was horrible!
Load More Replies... CHRISTY SMITH 2 years ago (edited)
How does this s**t even get FDA approved? I love how medications for depression always have side effects of suicides, anger, sleeplessness, etc. They KNOW it’s not going to work, but the medication is still pushed on you so that the Doctors can get their kickbacks and Big Pharma makes bank. There are so many medications where the side effects are way worse then the actual thing you’re trying to cure. https://www.angellawpc.com/blog/2011/february/serious-risks-associated-with-pfizers-chantix/#:~:text=The%20most%20dangerous%20side%20effects,nervousness%2C%20agitation%20rage%20and%20hostility. ****** “The most dangerous side effects linked to Chantix are suicide, suicide ideation and psychotic behavior. An alarming number of Chantix users have taken their own lives or seriously injured themselves in an attempt at suicide. Others have suffered depression, anxiety, nervousness, agitation rage and hostility.“
Stolas 2 years ago
it gets approved because a lot of those symptoms are neurological and everyone's brains will react differently i think
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Pink Taco Eater 2 years ago
I have a box of it on my nightstand. It’s been over 6 months since my doctor prescribed it to me to help me quit smoking. Stories like this are the reasons it will continue to sit there. I’m depressed enough and don’t need any medication to make it worse.
ginshun 2 years ago
Chantix worked for me with minimal side effects. I've never had issues with depression though. I think I'd avoid it if you already suffer from depression though, as I have heard of bad things in that situation. I would talk to your doctor about you depression, especially if you are on any other meds, before you start Chantix.
Load More Replies... #16
My grandpa showed me a picture of a family reunion from back in the 70s. He pointed out this fat cat looking guy and told me that it was his cousin from New York. He said he would show up to these reunions and shower everyone in gifts. I googled the name and turns out that that guy was in the Mafia and had a very large part in a historic moment for organized crime.
LadyKing 2 years ago
Anyone else read ‘fat cat looking guy’ and think omg a fat man that looked like a cat?! And then envision that image. No. Just me. Ok
SillyPandaBunny 2 years ago
John Gotti was mean. If there was a long line at the bank he’d skip it and go to the teller and make everyone else feel like s**t.
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LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
And then he went missing, but some people thought he was killed and buried under Giants' stadium, right?
Justin Thyme 2 years ago
Be proud that you didn't take that path, and wind up doing 80 years in the slammer
We also asked the hosts if they believe dark secrets should be brought to light. “I think deep dark secrets that surround murder and other horrific crimes should definitely be brought to the light,” LaDonna shared. “I've spent my entire life fighting for justice, and to me, justice can't be served if a deep dark secret is kept hidden.”
“If someone's dark secret is putting other people in danger of physical harm, I absolutely think It should be brought to light,” Alecia says.
#17
Not me but a family member.. she denies it still but I know the truth. I watched it happen. She was maybe 10 at the time.
She set a park amphitheater on fire. Decided she didn't want to go to jail so she found a cup in the trash and ran back and forth from the pond trying to put this massive fire out. Fire department showed up and saw her doing that. She got to ride home in the fire truck and they gave her an award for community action or something along those lines.
Kathrin Pukowsky 2 years ago
A 10-year-old has no clue how devastating fire is and how easily it can get out of control. Heck, lots of adults don't! She probably didn't expect the structure to catch fire as much as it did. I find it disturbing to ascribe serious intent to a literal child here. "Decided she didn't want to go to jail" - that's not how children think in a panicked state. Could've just ran away and denied everything, but didn't. This whole thing tells more about the OP, which, come to think of it, mentioned nothing about themselves trying to help put out the fire, but "watched it happen". Hm...
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Robert A Reider Jr 2 years ago (edited)
I know what happened to my big sisters hamster "peanuts" 52 Years ago. It was Easter vacation. We'd just come home from Disneyland. I was alone in the backyard playing with my dying mouse ears balloon when it struck me to tie my Easter basket to it. The contraption could only hover a few feet above ground....so, I thought I'd give peanuts a hot air balloon ride. He was floating over the pool where I couldn't get to him when a sudden gust carried him off. I watched, and bawled, as the balloon rose out of sight. My folks just thought I was overreacting to the loss of my toy and took me inside. I always prayed he landed safely. Never spoke a word as sis frantically searched for him. Feel bad to this day. A little better now that it's finally off my chest.
PunkRock*Bottom* 2 years ago
I feel like mistakes and accidents happen a lot but trying to do the right thing and fix it requires a much more conscious effort
TonyTee 2 years ago
True, especially at such a young age like her’s at that time
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AutisticSeagull 2 years ago
Sadly. If she isn't punished, who knows what she might do in the future. She should have at least told the thruth if she really felt guilty
Load More Replies... Jake B 2 years ago
I know a guy who knocked squirrels out of a tree so he could save them. Might be a match…. (Or a movie)
TonyTee 2 years ago (edited)
Not really a match, it’s safe to assume no one was harmed with the fire whereas it’s safe to assume those squirrels probably got hurt. But, I guess he can still get some kind of recognition for attempting to help them afterwards. 🤷🏻♂️
Load More Replies... Janet Howe 2 years ago
Wow. That's was one f**ked up 10 year old. They usually don't stop at arson. What else did she do?
#18
One summer, I fell in love with my cousin when I (M) was 13 and she was 14. During her visit, she kissed me. I said we couldn't do that again and she agreed. But she added that she was glad that we kissed at least once. Nothing else physical ever happened between us. We still see each other sometimes now. And every time we're together, I wish she could've been *anybody else's* cousin. Just not my cousin. She once told me outright that she wishes the same thing. She brings her husband to family reunions, of course. He and I look alike, have the same hobbies, share the same sense of humor, etc. But so far, nobody seems to have noticed that she married my clone. I asked her about that once. She said she really does love him and she loves her marriage. But she added "He was the next best thing."
MelodyHope666 2 years ago
I mean it's not like you choose who you fall in love with, it just happens and they happened to be cousins 🤷
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HeavyMetalHeart 2 years ago
Totally legal to marry your cousin in the UK. Not saying it’s a good idea and I’ve never known anyone who did, but it’s a fact that you can.
kay321 2 years ago
My great aunt married her 2nd cousin (UK) personally I find it yuck and even the thought of marrying one of my cousins makes me gag, but they've been married for like 60yrs.
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Christina B 2 years ago (edited)
I used to love RD, would read my grandmas or when at the dr's office
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JayCee 2 years ago
Yeah. Most people don't know that. As long as you don't have children together, it is completely legal. Morally.....?
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RachyLou92 2 years ago
Listen this is a huge secret for me too. When I was about 12 ish maybe earlier. Me and my cousin fell in love. We were born 2 days apart. We kissed all the time. Like didn't know anything was wrong. When I was like 21 I was having a mental breakdown. We started hanging out getting drunk (I also used drugs back then too but he didnt) we ended up starting a secret affair. Lasted a few months but ended when I fell pregnant. I aborted it. We stopped and I haven't seen him since. It's 9 years later now. I have a lot of wtf moments from that era but I have to accept I wasn't well and I made bad choices. Never ever been with anyone else my own age. Minimum of 10 years older. Maximum so far I was 21 and he was 51 so 30 years. So I'm not even into guys my own age. F**k knows. I still haven't got my head around it and that was a long time ago. . . . And 3 kids ago lol 😆
Joelle Jansen 2 years ago
Incidental cousin marriage is absolutely fine imo. Genetically speaking it doesn't increase risks much at all. It's when there is repeated cousing marriages within one family that you get the big abnormalities. Like, I get the ick-factor, but yeah, the genetics is not the argument you think it is.
Red PANda (she/they) 2 years ago
Ngl I think my cousin looks pretty cute from pictures I’ve seen, but I haven’t talked to him in like 10 years and so I have no clue what he’s like now or anything. However my whole family on my moms side is Mormon/LDS so I’m not getting my hopes up, or, for that matter, going down that rabbit hole at all :P
LaDonna also pointed out that it’s important to clearly define what a deep dark secret is. “I feel like that definition could be different for each of us,” she told Bored Panda. “For me, a deep dark secret is horrific -- something as I said earlier that involves murder and other horrific crimes. I do not think, however, that a deep dark secret includes romantic attraction, sexual preferences, or mental health problems. Our podcast is advocacy focused, which means we are fighting to make a difference on behalf of victims who have been raped, tortured, abused and murdered. It is our goal to make a difference and stop those deep dark secrets (like death fetish) that often turn deadly.”
If you’d like to listen to some episodes of the Deep Dark Secrets podcast, you can find their website right here, their Facebook page right here, and their Instagram right here!
#19
Every time someone talks positively about their parents I feel an unavoidable deep sinking pain in my chest. I feel just short of hateful. I feel jealous, but mostly I feel pain. It’s always been this way. I’m in therapy, I have been for years, but lately I’m starting to feel like I’ll never get over the abuse and neglect and ongoing aloof victim b******t they each pull in their respective way. I’m exhausted from wanting to be loved and seen by people I know are not capable of that at all.
Lori w 2 years ago
Yeah. I'm a year apart from my brother and I haven't talked to him in years. When people talk about how they get along with their sibling or their sibling helped them out, it's hard not to feel a little bitter.
Parriah 2 years ago
Yeah, my TWIN was my childhood AND adulthood bully. She never let up to the point I wanted to kill myself at 12. I cut her out of my life last year and get a lot of flack from family but I won’t relent. I have cancer now, found out 3 days ago, the pressure to give HER peice of mind and forgive her will definitely be huge from my family.. I don’t forgive her.
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DBear 2 years ago (edited)
I get the same feeling when anyone talks negatively about their parents and the complaints are petty like they didn't get the exact car they wanted for their graduation or their parents couldn't afford to send them to private school. My parents' beat the c**p out of me on a regular basis for the slightest reasons. I actually have chronic trauma encephalopathy from the beatings. Yeah, maybe mom and dad didn't love you enough to get you a Mercedes but they did love you enough not to leave you with lifelong trauma.
Dela Bee 2 years ago
I had to upvote every comment on this one. It's oddly comforting that so many of us have/had terrible families. I was sinking for so long because it was drilled into my head that you need family no matter what. Then I realized that I can make my own family and I love my chosen family of nerdy friends more than anything.
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
You are lucky to have friends, it's really hard to make friends the older you get. I actually thought about going to an AA group meeting to meet people and I don't drink!
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Matt Du 2 years ago (edited)
My mother died just before christmas and it's like a weight has gone. I should of walked away from her years ago. She gaslighted me all my life, even now writing this I can feel my guilt. I had an active imagination, I was attention seeking and he wouldn't of done it if I hadn't encouraged him. As she was dying she asked me to forgive her then told me, I had blown it all out of proportion, he was about the same age and it's normal for children to explore", I was 8, he was 21 and it was dozens of times. Don't be me, make a new family and never look back
von Krawall 2 years ago
I feel the sameway and I'm 40. Tge differnxe bowis just that all of my good friends have a*****e parents and we understand each other. We are oir new family. We celebrate Christmas together, we go on vacations together and whenever we have to see our parents we have a group chat where we write what our parents say and do while we are there and get a lot of support and love from our friends.
StrangeOne 2 years ago
My mom wasn't really physically abusive and that's what I used to believe abuse was. Then in Grade 10 health class I learned there's mental, emotional, verbal and coercive abuse. I was a pretty stressed out anxious kid at home and at school, and feared talking to my mom. It was then I knew why and since then I've been piecing everything my mom put me through, and how she spoke to me in my head. Please, if you don't want kids for the sake of loving your kids, don't. Kids are not awards, trophies, your puppets, dolls, your personal servants.
Leoninus Fate 2 years ago
I was born in a small Japanese town that was filled with superstitious old people and I was born albino, One of the Old men had enough of us I guess and broke into our home, my mother was shot in the head in front of me protecting me from the bullet for me, and my dad left me in an orphanage/asylum for a few years and I lost my eye there, they forced my dad to take me and then my stepmom forced me to eat stuff with chocolate that I'm deathly allergic to when that didn't hurt m much she slit my throat and all over my face....all of that before took place before I was 12 years old... Im ok my aunt took me in and adopted me, Sadly She just passed away May 22, she helped me over my cancer, my tumor, and everything since I can no longer walk, I now spend my life online trying to help kids/teens, and adults who have went through abused homes or are in abused homes, I have adopted a lot of those "teen/adults" and give them a family that none of us had before
Leoninus Fate 2 years ago
I also want to say, you can see a lot of stories of me and my partner on the bored panda page and comments here too If messaged I guess I can tell you where to find more of me and our life
Load More Replies... Red PANda (she/they) 2 years ago
A lot of my friends have terrible parents and it kind of makes me stick out as the only one with supportive, accepting, great parents 😅 they’re not perfect ofc (nobody is), but it just makes me realize how lucky I am and how great I have it
#20
I think about running away from my life almost daily. Not because it’s bad but just because I’m bored and think this can’t be all there is to it.
Tee Rat 2 years ago
My sister did this and left 5 young kids behind with their dad. My younger sister stepped in to raise them after dad's drinking became a problem. Her relationship with her kids has never been the same and she accused my younger sister of stealing her kids. Even at 60 yrs old she still won't own up to the fact that she caused this to happen.
Christina B 2 years ago
my mother did this...will never own up to it, but honestly, while I do miss having a mother I am glad I don't have to deal with her.
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Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
Every time I'm at a harbour I have fantasies about stowing away on one of the ships and disappearing to parts unknown. And I'm one of those people who gets anxious as hell if I'm too far away from home for too long. I want adventures but I hate taking risks too much to actually have them, at least on that sort of scale.
Barong 2 years ago
Seems relatively normal. To shake things up, to start fresh, to abandon a current life, to see what you may be missing, all has an appeal. And normal not to say anything too. Why make anyone worry that you’ll abandon them someday when you won’t or that something is bothering you when nothing is.
StrangeOne 2 years ago
Same. When I'm out for a stroll to the coffee shop on my lunch break I wonder what would happen if, or why don't, I just keep going and not look back. Like, just don't return. Sure, I'll lose that job but what other job is out there that might be better for me? Such a nice sunny day and the animals are free to enjoy the outdoors. Why can't I?
Bec 2 years ago
I know someone who moved across the country, in part to try to get a fresh start after he had made a mess of things. Now he pouts because he can't get his two girls back because the state feels they are safer and more stable with his sister - your actions have consequences even if you a little narcissist who was never told 'no' as a child
Jacob B. 2 years ago
There are many times my wife and I just want to buy some condo or home on the Yucatan and vanish from our family. Long story short, I'm the eldest and often have to make decisions (and its enshrined in a legal document that I'm the final say so on my side, turns out on my wife's side, I became the final say so by default, long story). Anyway, funeral arrangements, inheritance issues, etc. have fallen to us...and when being fair, that is just dividing things equally, get nailed. When my grandfather passed, it was strait forward. My sister and aunt decided to fight, so, instead of being the middle guy, I told them to contact each other directly...and walked away. Irony, the settlement was exactly the Trust established. They spent a lot of energy and money over nothing.
Beverly Lodge 2 years ago
I grew up looking at myself every day like I wasn't in y own body. I was kinda pretty, I could have been popular, I never did that because "I wasn't ME". I found me - first with writing (which you seem to be doing) and second with drugs. Haha jk please don't do drugs you'll literally ruin your life. But experience is great. DON'T do nose drugs. Bad
#21
I've cremated all my relatives against their wishes. Burial is just too much man.
Zophra 2 years ago
Unless said relative had pre-prepared a fund to cover their expensive funeral and burial costs, I don't think this person is in the wrong if they just couldn't financially afford it.
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
Not only that, but after a generation or two, there’s no one to visit and appreciate the grave anyway. A burial is a horrid use of land. It’s just a temporary place for people to go to think, and once they’re gone, it’s just a waste of space and resources. 😕
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Nadia D 2 years ago
I have this same question 😂😂😂 So, yeah, this is the best comment so far and thank you for making my day 😇
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Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
I should inform my family that I only want to be cremated if they have my ashes turned into a diamond afterwards. I can be reborn as an heirloom ring or a locket or something! "What a lovely piece of jewellery!" "Thanks, it's my Aunt Katie." "Uh..." "Yeah, she's way more attractive now, actually."
ThatBlackNightingale 2 years ago
Yes, I can't stand the thought of people saying speeches about me and mourning me at a burial. If you really care keep me as jewelry lol.
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Mona Stevenson 2 years ago
A waste of space, yes, but there are more ecological solutions than cremation.
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Say No to Downvoting 2 years ago
It’s not against their will - they don’t have will, they are dead.
Deborah B 2 years ago
If you haven't arranged a burial plot etc, or specifically set aside funds, who do you expect to pay for your funeral/burial? Funeral homes really price-gouge grieving relatives, especially on coffins. For me, I want cremation, at the earliest possible moment, and absolutely none of the ridiculous "viewing" c**p. No one needs to see the Dead Body that was previously Deborah.
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
When my father passed, the funeral home took his body and began to get him ready for burial even though we wanted cremation. Luckily we stopped them before they got too far and had him cremated, but it was still around $7000 which is ridiculous. It costs so much to be disposed of and people rarely plan ahead to prevent all the financial stress on whoever is left behind.
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Luttjetrut 2 years ago
The day I brought home the ashes, I found the letter my father wrote stating he wantet to be burried... So I cremated him by accident.
Gardener of Weeden 2 years ago
That is different, you did not go against his wishes on purpose.
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Karl 2 years ago
It’s not like they’re going to know or care either way (unless you’re of the “my dead ancestors are watching me” school of thought - which begs the question, why is the afterlife so boring and haven’t they got better stuff to do than watch me masturbate? 🤔)
Royal Stray 2 years ago
They probably do, it's not like that school of thought think that they watch you around the clock, all day. But if there is an afterlife they might care. It's also about honoring the wishes of someone who was once alive. Although you should probably put away a fund for it before you die, so your relatives don't hace to pay
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 2 years ago
Cremating people against their will is a violation of their rights, and you shouldn't be at all surprised if they stop speaking to you and cut off all contact.
Fussy1 2 years ago
JMHO, but I think they're going to stop speaking to you and cut off all contact regardless if you cremate them against their wishes or with full consent.
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AliJanx 2 years ago
My husband had always wanted a gravestone, he wanted to be memorialized. I chose cremation for him. I felt so guilty and confessed the decision to one of his closest friends. The friend said, "how much for a graveside burial and headstone?" $15,000. "How much for a cremations and donation to the church?" $3,000 +/-. "How would your husband want you to spend the money?" Guilt resolved.
#22
I'm secretly attracted to a guy at work. I'm a completely straight male. But whenever I see him get the butterflies. I'm married and have a wife. He's just kinda cute.
David Paterson 2 years ago
Actually, yes it is what "completely straight" is. Some people out there are just totally irresistible.
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AR 2 years ago
Sexuality is a spectrum. There is nothing wrong with having a crush on a person of the same sex while being 95% straight.
Saint_Zipcodus 2 years ago
To be honest, I think this happens to way more people than we know. No harm done. Enjoy the warm fuzzies.
Loverboy 2 years ago
lol "completely straight". I remember being the same way with my first guy crush. Like yeah I'm definitely straight, he just happens to make me blush and give me butterflies, nothing gay about that. Right?
XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧 2 years ago
There is absolutely such a thing as being attracted to the person themselves vs what is (or isn't) dangling between their legs.
2 years ago
yup, pansexual! i'm attracted to the individual person and their gender doesn't factor in at all.
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Celeste Grant 2 years ago
Why so many comments challenging this guy's sexuality. He says he's straight, you don't know anything about him except two sentences yet some people think they know his sexuality better than he does. How he chooses to label his own sexuality is his choice and no one has the right to tell him otherwise. You can't just "out" him as Bi just because you think he is. Sexually is a spectrum and everyone should have the right to identify however they choose.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Not all "crushes" are romantic or sexual. Charm and charisma draw people, too.
#23
I once was involved in a university black market where they handed me out past exam papers because our professor never hands out one for us to practice. I studied them with a friend of mine. A week after, it was the exact same exam word for word. Only the year changed. I memorized the answers off by heart. I finished in 45 mins, f****d around and pretended to think for 2 more hours to avoid getting caught. I got a 95% in an engineering exam with a poker face.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
When I taught math, I re-used past tests but changed one number in each question and altered the order of the questions. So if your answers perfectly matched those of the previous test, you guaranteed yourself a zero,
David Paterson 2 years ago (edited)
So that's why other people did so much better in engineering exams than I did. ;-)
StrangeOne 2 years ago
Ever wonder if the point of exams was to see who was smart enough to not get caught cheating?
Joe Reaves 2 years ago
Exams that are a test of memory (except in fields like emergency medicine) are a bit pointless. The important skills in almost any profession are to know what information you need, where to find it. and how to use it rather than memorising the information itself. Open book exams are the way to go IMO.
Robert T 2 years ago
How is that a black market? Did money change hands? I remember one of my exams was pretty similar - if you took the "LES" off "Examples"... The annoying thing is that I actually understood the subject and would have got a decent result even without, whilst the cannon fodder got a much higher mark than expected. At the end of the day the results were moderated, so noone benefitted that much. I'm still salty about my final year project though, which was really complex and the guy moderating it didn't understand what I had actually acomplished.
Brittany Howard 2 years ago (edited)
My only criticism of this one is the blame-shifting: "because our professor never hands out one for us to practice." You're in college. Make your own study materials.
Robert Beveridge 2 years ago
We had an entire room in my fraternity in college called the cold exam room... I thought this sort of thing was completely normal. (I should note I was in college nearly 40 years ago.)
Elaine Reed 2 years ago
Did you keep that black market paper to check back as a reference when you really need it? Memorising those answers wont help if the numbers are different in the formula.
#24
I worked in a crematorium in the late 80's. We had a shelf in the back that we stored cheap plastic urns on. One night as I was sitting and waiting for one cremation to finish there was a loud crash that scared the sh*t out of me. When I went back to look the shelf had collapsed. I ended up just scooping the ashes back into the containers but never told anyone about it.
Saint_Zipcodus 2 years ago
Sepulchral culture is for the living. The dead don't care. Ignorance is bliss and imho nobody got hurt.
René Sauer 2 years ago
Well, what else could you possibly have done, OP? Trying to separate the ashes? 🤣
AreYouGoingToEatThatPickle? 2 years ago
In most jurisdictions, ashes are tightly sealed in plastic bags inside the containers, so not sure how this happened.
Sharkie 2 years ago
OP said in the 80s... So now it is less likely but I am not sure everything was in plastic bags back then...
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#25
When I was 10 I saw a man stab his girlfriend at a rest stop and I pretended not to see anything
Shannon Donnelly 2 years ago
You were a child and completely in equipped to deal with such a volatile adult situation. Had you done something you very likely could have put yourself in a dangerous situation. More police officers are injured responding to domestic disputes than any other types of calls. If the experts have a hard time dealing with these situations, a 10 year old has no place getting involved. If you haven't tried therapy, it's something you may want to consider.
TonyTee 2 years ago (edited)
My whole heart goes out to the woman. An individual like that has mental problems with a dark soul. You can’t trust them, they’re unpredictable and, obviously dangerous. Regardless of how young you were, trying to help would’ve resulted in you being his next victim. Don’t hold it against yourself, f**k that, you did nothing wrong. Even if it’s rather foolish I’m holding onto hope that the woman is ok. 🤞🏼🤞🏼
Loverboy 2 years ago
You couldn't have done anything. I hope (and doubt) the poor woman was okay. Sometimes it's best to just mind your own business.
Binky Melnik 2 years ago (edited)
I can totally understand a child being terrified of being stabbed, too, if she said anything. Kids are relatively dumb because they haven’t experienced much yet. I was terrified of hugging my grandmother as she died of cancer because I was afraid of catching cancer. She was in agony and prolly wanting some relief, and I wouldn’t go within six feet of her. That still eats me alive every day, and I spose it always will. I wish I could at least apologize, but she spoke no English (of which I was terribly ashamed). See what I mean? Dumb, dumb, dumb. 😞
Leoninus Fate 2 years ago
This is a case of "what could you do?" they could go help and get hurt, or they could stay quiet and not be hurt.....I feel for them
#26
About 16 years ago, my parents (51 M/49 F at the time) got a divorce because my mother turned out to be cheating on my father with a 15 year old she had met in church.
Once the divorce was finalized, my father began to date his biological cousin and almost married her. This is the TL:DR version of what happened but it was a whirlwind of WTF moments for about 3 years as everything came out.
To this day, they act like nothing either of them did was wrong.
Id row 2 years ago
What is with the church community and the overabundance of predators it has? I guess they see it as good cover.
Brittany Howard 2 years ago
People in church are conditioned to believe other church-goers are good and well-intentioned. They let their guard down. Also, many people who grow up in churches are very sheltered and may miss signs more worldly people would notice. At least that's been my experience. Some churches are trying to fix this, though. That's what Safe Sanctuaries training is about.
Load More Replies... AliJanx 2 years ago
The only issue with dating bio cousin is if you want to have children; could bring recessive traits that could be dangerous to the child. If both people are consenting adults, outside of childbearing years, there's no issue. Even if the are of childbearing years, it's an eyes-wide-open kinda thing. Society's mores around this has relaxed somewhat.
Paul Neff 2 years ago
They may seem relaxed now, but if you go back a few hundred years, they effectively did not exist at all. We really raised the bar, in this area, a few hundred years ago.
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luka! (she/her) 2 years ago
I'm just wondering if the 15 yr old is okay. Also why isn't the mom in jail??
Paul Pienkowski 2 years ago
Okay, the adult cousins dating isn't an issue as long as children aren't the goal. Both are consensual adults. The mom though...whoa. She's just a pedophile.
Elaine Van Zon 2 years ago
They can in the UK,and other countries I think
Load More Replies... #27
I’m a guy and I enjoy wearing ladies underwear.
Benita Valdez 2 years ago
My neighbor for years could be seen many days in ladies underwear and a robe; he just strut his stuff past window's and open doors and to go outside to get the mail and newspaper. He said he found them incredibly comfortable. Noone ever cared except his children but even if they were men's underwear they were still embarrassed cuz dad in undies and robe in full view of the world. Point is, if you enjoy it then go for it 😊
#28
I love my wife dearly, but she's one of the least intelligent people I know. She struggles with very very basic things. Her whole family does. She's from a small town and wasn't exposed to a lot by her parents and their simple lifestyle. She's said a few things that maybe some people would find cute for how ignorant they were, but I just get a little more depressed every time.
Kristi Savage Cook 2 years ago
So I am curious why you thought you'd be a good match? Surely she didn't lose IQ points after the wedding...
XenoMurph 2 years ago
When you are young and in love you don't take an IQ test. People grow as individuals, sometimes people grow in different directions. We don't assume our partner will refuse to grow or learn as we do.
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Jared Robinson 2 years ago
what you know and how smart your are are two very different things my friend.
JL 2 years ago
I'd like to see some details on this one. He says she's unintelligent for being 'simple', but he just might be uppity and elitist.
Kori 2 years ago
Differences in intelligence are a thing. I couldn‘t be with a dumb person either, my own partner is extremely smart. His mistake was to marry her
Load More Replies... Id row 2 years ago
I couldn't handle being with someone I couldn't have an intelligent conversation with.
Amanda Silliker 2 years ago
I'm sapioseggsual (will that work here?), I get it. I can't carry the mental load of engaging conversations by myself.
Load More Replies... Michael Largey 2 years ago
I don't know exactly how dumb your wife is, but she certainly was clueless to marry you.
StrangeOne 2 years ago
Why do people bash others for having a low IQ, as if it also lowers their worth as a person? If someone needs a bit more guidance, hasn't learned something, just show them. Or don't if you can't go about it kindly. It's not their fault. Don't use it against them as an insult because it does hurt them deep. My daughter is Intellectually Disabled, though she is high functioning as she can possibly be. But there are times she has moments where something others think she should know isn't clicking with her. The poor girl gets distraught, breaks down then hits her head out of frustration asking why she can't just understand like everyone else. Joking around about it may seem like a joke to those who haven't lived with a low IQ but when you do or care for someone who does it's hard to see them deal with the dirty looks, sarcastic tones and other mean stuff people do. But I guess empathy doesn't come naturally for some, either.
Kori 2 years ago
I agree that „bashing“ someone for being simple/having a low IQ and absolutely not okay, but nobody has to babysit or constantly help out someone who‘s on an entirely different level of understanding. They simply don‘t match and it‘s perfectly okay to stick to people you actually enjoy engaging with.
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Mylittlecorgi 2 years ago
One of the wisest people I've ever known had a 3rd grade education. Just because someone lacks knowledge doesn't mean they're stupid. It means they've lacked opportunities- and making fun of someone like this is reprehensible.
Kori 2 years ago
Yet stupid people exist, and they are, in all honesty, a handful to deal with.
Load More Replies... C L 2 years ago
So you can't teach her the things she doesn't know? You just let her struggle? I can't believe she doesn't know something isn't right and worry about it.
XenoMurph 2 years ago
Some people are comfortable in their ignorance. In some families knowledge is belittled and education disrespected.
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Boris’ Mom 2 years ago
And, don't let who you are "die a little every day" or "build resentment" because of who she can't be. They say marriage is supposed to be until death do you part, but a therapist who I was seeing said: How about it is until the death of the spirit of the marriage vows? That said, I had been married 8 years and after one subject after another [the bank account, how I was having troubles at work, I was okay with working overtime to purchase 'his dreams'...] was added to the list of ' We already talked about it once. I don't want to talk about it again'. [So we talked about the checking account, and now we can't talk about the saving account? So I was having problems getting trained, and now I'm having a problem with being harrassed by the new person that transferred in, and we can't talk?] So I thought the job was a good fit, and now the company has changed policies, but I already committed to liking the job, so touch s__t on me?. Many relationship things were on the never talk about
Load More Replies... #29
For the past 9 years, I've been squirreling away money on offshore accounts. Just in case s**t hits the fan, I have something to start with a new life.
Two_rolling_black_eyes 2 years ago
Offshore can just disappear and it's lost forever. Just ask the Swiss and the Nazis. Make sure you have something tangible as well for a scram bag. All it takes is one computer error changing an account number from I to 1 and the money is gone. Panama papers also showed the offshore can also just take your assets and run and there's no way to get it back.
StrangeOne 2 years ago
This is what makes me nervous having any amount of money in the bank.
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Freya the Wanderer 2 years ago
If things really go to s--t, gold will have almost no value. You can't eat gold.
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Mycroft1967 2 years ago
If the apocalypse happens, I'm pretty sure you will not be able to retrieve it and have my doubts about your ability to spend it.
Mona Stevenson 2 years ago (edited)
Unless the OP can do what Peter Thiel did, and buy up a whole bunch of New Zealand. (I don’t like the guy one bit, but that was a bad-a** apocalypse survival move if there ever was one.)
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Julia Eledhwen 2 years ago
They might mean something happening in politics that would be a threat to them (due to race or sexual orientation or something) or something in their family. It's a good plan to have if you're in an unstable environment.
CHRISTY SMITH 2 years ago
I would love to know how much they’ve managed to squirrel away, because I’m ridiculously nosey.
#30
I started hooking up with one of my closest friend’s ex not even a month after they broke up. It turned into semi dating and I even attended her mom and step dad’s small wedding. He would always complain that she wouldn’t do things in bed but she was an absolute freak with me and while that made me feel even more guilty it was also hot as f**k
She had him blocked on everything (related to the break up, he was no saint) and even after she moved back to South Korea and we ended things amicably I got ahold of his phone when he was drunk one night and blocked her from his social media just incase she ever decides to reach back out
It’s been 8 years and nobody knows
Givemeabreak101 2 years ago
I hooked up with my best friends ex one night. He found out and it almost ended our friendship. It turns out she was just as nuts as he said she was.
María Hermida 2 years ago
He wasn't too normal either. You ex is you EX. Why do people care so much what their exes do?
Load More Replies... #31
My parents' lives have been difficult, whenever they call they just tell me it's hard that they want to die. I'm an only child. One time they called and shared the same stuff, I told them I was feeling the same way and would like to end things too (like let's die together then). My current partner doesn't know about this. Edit: I am a bubbly person who's living solo, away from my parents since I might go insane if I stay with them. Sadly, they can still affect my well-being by one single call
Dawnyducks 2 years ago
They sound absolutely horrible. What parent says that to their child? Tell them you wont talk to them again until they have seen a therapist for x amount of time.
Ripley 2 years ago
Not as bad but when I was a kid a relative would call on Christmas Day to say hello to the family, and I'd always be called upon to "say hi to your [relative]" The call would start off OK, but then they would cry and talk about how awful everything was. Even at 12 I knew that this was seriously not OK to dump on a child.
DarkViolet 2 years ago
Your parents should have shut that down immediately.
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Vermonta 2 years ago
Wow, what was their reaction? Bring them some edibles. When I worked as a pharmacy tech in the 80's I noticed a lot of senior people took Imipramine.
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
Older people really need friends and that's the time of life that they start dying off and it's incredibly lonely. So how do you make friends after 50 and when you are somewhat physically limited?
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Mommy Panda 2 years ago (edited)
my dad did this too, mainly when he had too much to drink (which was quite often). He'd say he had lived the best years of his life and that he had enough of life. Made me feel as if I wasn't enough to live for. I know that's not what he meant, but it still hurt.
Janet Howe 2 years ago
This is a lot to lay on a son or daughter. Your parents need help. Maybe they're feeling depressed about aging or being/becoming ill. Or having financial troubles. You really should contact their doctors.
Wanda Johnson 2 years ago
I'm fighting this Desire RN...Everyday I wake up knowing I have to call Her makes me want to self-disconnect or drive head on into a wall at 100 mph
#32
For almost 10 years and still going (Im 23) I love to bite and pick at the skin of my cheeks and inside of my lip until it bleeds. And when it starts healing i chew off the scab and gnaw on it until it dissipates. I've looked into this and everywhere i read it's a stress/anxiety coping mechanism as well as a repetitive body disfunction. Anyone else here ruins their lips
Lori w 2 years ago
I have a tendency to pick at the dry skin at my lips. I've gotten better by: recognizing I am getting rid of healthy skin every time I do this, using less drying Chapsticks (Clinique superbalm or eos have worked for me), using breathing techniques instead of picking, and practicing being gentle. I remind myself it's ok, you can leave it. Be kind to yourself ❤️
Lakota Wolf (she/her) 2 years ago
I'm a fingertip/nail destroyer. I go at them until I bleed, until it hurts. It's just like OP says, stress/anxiety and my form of self-harm (it stops the bad thoughts for a while). I know I need to do some of the things that you do - try to center myself, try to breathe and focus and release some of the anxiety - but it's hard. I've done it for nearly 30 years at this point XD
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Pink Aesthetic 2 years ago
I DO THAT TOO! When I'm nervous or bored, I chew my cheeks and especially the insides of my mouth corners. They have formed thick skin bumps at where I've chewed them but it doesn't really affect me. I think it actually makes my smile look cuter (the bumps are barely noticeable and are INSIDE my mouth). I like the crunch it makes and it relieves stress
Otis B Driftwood 2 years ago
I floss because it feels good to hurt my gums and make them bleed.
Upstaged75 2 years ago
I stick my fingernails in to my gums. In one place I actually wore it away and made my tooth loose. So I try to avoid it, but I agree that it feels good.
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LandAhoy 2 years ago
I had a compulsion since I was a small child to pick out my eyelashes and eyebrows. I tried everything to stop picking but couldn't, even though I hated the way I looked and my parents told me off. When my pubes grew, I was able to switch to picking them instead so I could hide my habit. As an adult I managed to stop that by keeping it shaved, but would still occasionally go for an eyebrow or eyelash or even a boyfriend's beard hair, some were more tolerant than others! I hate what it's done to me, I need to wear eyebrow pencil and fake eyelashes every day just to look normal. Please get professional help for your damaging compulsion ASAP otherwise you might never enjoy eating in the future. Hypnosis could help.
Doodles1983 2 years ago
Me too. It’s called trichotillomania. I also pick skin. Hang nails and my face if there’s a zit. Anxiety and compulsion.
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Weird Panda 2 years ago
Yes all the way my lips and the inside of my mouth have been destroyed by me
Michelle Rudd 2 years ago
It's a body focussed repetitive behaviour, therapy can be very beneficial (if it's available to you) but like everything else, the person concerned has to really want to stop.
#33
This is my darkest secret, i mixed a strong laxative in the juice of an obnoxious c**t of my class who got my whole day of college attendance cancelled because i didn't contribute in the crowdfunding for the birthday of our head of department. I was broke af was the reason.
TRQ 2 years ago
Who wrote this? What does "got my whole day or college attendance cancelled" mean? Is she a classmate? If so, how did she do that? And how did she know you didn't contribute? This drivel reads like someone went to college for engineering.
Tessa 2 years ago
I think OP is saying that she managed to somehow whipe out OP’s attendance record for that day. So maybe students have to sign their name off on a form at the beginning of each class and the girl removed his name from all the lists? I agree though, there are a lot of empty spots in this story to fill in.
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Nightshade1972 2 years ago
"Got my whole day of college attendance canceled?!" What does that even mean?!
Jake B 2 years ago
Man watch out for the office people who want you to donate for this and that, bring in food for parties etc. There are those who don’t get the ones just starting out have little or no money.
Mona Stevenson 2 years ago (edited)
I’ve given sooo much over the years for office weddings, engagements, births, birthdays, retirements, you name it. Really wish peeps would keep to themselves a bit more. That kind of peer pressure isn’t fun.
Load More Replies... Upstaged75 2 years ago
On the last day of middle school my friend and I gave our bus driver brownies that we'd made with chocolate Ex-Lax. She was an awful women who hated kids (including her own it seemed) and everyone hated her back. She was also a terrible driver who was late every single day. (Which sucked in the winter when we stood out there freezing!) We never found out if she ate them or if anything happened, but at the time we all thought it was the best prank ever. Which just goes to show that 13 year-olds should never be trusted. :)
Mary Kelly 2 years ago
and don't tell anyone until the statute of limitations is up...that's called poisoning
Teresa Chason 2 years ago
I thought that something like that was against the law. You could actually really mess someone up like that.
Load More Replies... #34
Not my deepest secret, but a card I keep pretty close to my chest: Nearly every week of my life since age 19, I've had a vivid dream about my high school girlfriend. I'm 47 now.
Averysleepypanda 2 years ago (edited)
I don't have this as frequently, but have often had dreams of my high-school boyfriend. I asked my therapist about it once, because I felt guilty ("I'm married," I thought, "I shouldn't be dreaming fondly about old boyfriends"). My therapist told me it can actually just be that I look back at that time of my life in general fondly and that was a time when I happened to be dating him too. She said it can represent longing for when times were simpler and more carefree, since as adults we are so burdened with so many other things. Once I had understanding it really did make much more sense and the guilt went away. That time period of my childhood was one of the only times I was happy (due to a bad childhood home) and I'm glad to be able to cherish it and relive it in my dreams once in awhile.
Michael Largey 2 years ago (edited)
It could be worse. You could have an old girlfriend who regularly dreams about you and writes you about it. Despite her husband and seven children. Despite the fact that she knows you're married. Despite the fact you have never answered or acknowledged these letters in any way. Believe me, it could be much worse.
whiterabbit 2 years ago
Ive had the same experience but with a person from highschool that i never actually dated. I grew up in a tiny town and my class had 28 kids, most of us together from kindergarten through graduation. Ive had regular dreams about one guy my entire adult life, i haven't even seen him in about 10 years.
PurpleUnicorn🇮🇪 2 years ago
I have vivid dreams every month around ovulation time, nearly always featuring one particular ex, but occasionally others visit. Strangely, the only ex who doesn't visit is the one I reconnected with (but didn't meet) 20 years later (he has since died).
#35
I nearly killed my brother accidentally. When we were kids, we were playing outside and he just kinda annoyed me. So I went home, got a can of peas, and then proceed to throw it at his head. He crumpled and was unconscious for a bit. I remember freaking out that maybe I killed him but he came to several minutes later. To this day, almost 19 years later, he doesn’t remember anything, and he doesn’t seem to have any neurological problems, he seems normal. I haven’t told anyone this, not even my parents. I just told them he fell and hit his head when they noticed the lump on his head, but didn’t mention that he was unconscious.
Mark Trombley 2 years ago
I think most boys have almost killed their brother at some point in their lives.
Upstaged75 2 years ago
My little brother once picked up a big piece of broken glass and chucked it at me after I splashed him in the creek. It stuck in my knee and I bled like crazy. It was a good thing he could run faster than me because I might have drowned him if I had caught him! :) I still have a scar. He doesn't remember it at all.
Load More Replies... Brenda 2 years ago
I hit my older sister (who was chasing me with a knife) in the head with the part of the phone you spoke in to. I was swinging it like a rope over my head (wall phone with long cord) when it slipped. She went down for about a minute. I was convinced I'd killed her. We never told our mom.
Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
Went to the market with my brother Jim, when somebody threw a tomato at him. Tomatoes are soft and they don't bruise the skin. But this one killed Jim - it was wrapped in a tin. (I'm sorry; I couldn't stop myself).
Duckie Measles 2 years ago
My brother filled up a tube sock with batteries and coins then sacked me with it while I was sleeping. Kids can be so violent sometimes.
LinkTheHylian 2 years ago
I call BS. Who thinks they've killed someone and doesn't immediately hide the body? Or recreate "Weekend at Bernie's"?
#36
I fell in love with a married man when I was in college. I have never told anyone and as far as I know his wife never found out. He passed away a few years ago from a heart attack. After we ended our affair I cut off all contact with him and he moved to another state. I didn't attend the funeral but I still grieve for him. Even though it was wrong I still love him.
Debbie 2 years ago
Love can't be controlled. It should be two sentences. "It was wrong" and: "I still love him". It being wrong doesn't make you stop loving someone.
Julia 2 years ago
Love can't be controlled, but we can control our actions. If you fall in love with a married person, don't pursue them, cut the contact. Not being a d**k is not that hard.
Load More Replies... Shankshaw Redeemer 2 years ago
I fell in love with a married man several years ago and still feel the same about him even though we never see one another. I know he feels the same way about me, although people would say he doesn't. No one can help with whom they fall in love. I certainly didn't want it and tried extremely hard to fight it off. I understand what OP is saying.
Janet Howe 2 years ago
Sometimes we have no control over who we love. When I was 18 I fell in love with someone who was still married. He did divorce his then wife. We dated for about 2 years, broke up, but he was always the first love. Thru the years we would get together from time to time. He was married, I wasn't. Or I was married, he wasn't. But I loved this man all my life. We finally decided it was time to finally be together for good, in 2006. We never married, it wasn't my goal. Just wanted to be with him. Together until he passed away last year. It wasn't always rosy, but as I said, I'd loved this man all my life. In the end, I knew how much he really loved me. I wasn't expecting it-- he left me a large portion of his estate, that will be my security for many many years.
#37
I fell in love with my brothers wife a few years ago, they're separated now but I never even seriously thought about making a move. I have a girlfriend now and even the thought of one of my brothers being into her makes me angry. I never would have made a move, but that thought seriously puts things into perspective on how uncool it was for me to think about her like that. I think about and regret it a lot.
over it already 2 years ago
You can't control feelings. It sounds like you did control your actions, so I see nothing to feel regretful of. I still wouldn't tell my brother if I were you, but you shouldn't need to carry any guilt or regret.
Sheri Carlson Peck 2 years ago
Thoughts are just that, thoughts. There is no shame. You never acted on your feelings and that's what matters
Dim T 2 years ago
I mean sometimes thoughts aren't just thoughts, one should examine ones biases and modes of thought, especially in situations where one is in a position where it affects others, like in a hiring positions Ofc individual thoughts can be random noises from our brain, intrusive thoughts undue anxiety etc, but this wasn't that
Load More Replies... Janet Howe 2 years ago
It's not always something we have control over. You may have fell in love with her, but you never acted on it. Do you think she ever know you were in love with her? There's no need for regret if you've gotten over it. You realize it might have done irreparable damage to the relationship with your brother, right? Move on and enjoy your time with your girlfriend. She deserves all your attention.
#38
I had a drunken argument with my travelling buddy when in Asia together years ago... She became physical and started shoving me around, became incredibly intimidating, screaming in my face etc. I left the bar we were at and went back to our hostel room ... I was so annoyed at her I scrubbed the unsanitary Asian toilet in our room with her toothbrush....
Despite my horror on realising what I had done in the morning, I didn't tell her.
She came down with the worst D+V the evening after.... Ended up on a drip in some tourist hospital. Was in said hospital for about 3 days... Whoops.
Loverboy 2 years ago
You two got in an argument so you put her in the hospital. Well, I can understand the anger you were feeling and what she did in the first place wasn't right... but come on.
LandAhoy 2 years ago
I doubt she intended to put her in hospital. She probably viewed it like a waiter spitting in someone's food, or serving a coffee with breast milk, or having a hand shandy into someone's shandy. Or making a dog food curry. Something disgusting if the person knew, but not intending to harm her. I'm sure if 100 healthy young people brushed their teeth after scrubbing a dirty toilet, 99 would be fine.
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Paul Neff 2 years ago
Yeah... about that... a genuine psycho would have far worse options available than sabotaging dental hygiene tools. That traveling buddy was described as becoming physically violent, and they still felt horror over doing that to a toothbrush. The fact that it may have contributed to a three day hospital visit is a remarkably light consequence, coming from a psycho.
Load More Replies... Panda Kicki 2 years ago
This was very close to attempted murder or at least a serious assault.
I’mSoEmotional 2 years ago
This is pretty horrific. If she had died would you still be thinking "whoops?" If you would, then you need to check yourself in to get a mental evaluation.
Justin Thyme 2 years ago
So feloniuois assault merits a whoops-- dude, get help-- you're f*cked in the head
Spittnimage 2 years ago
Sociopathic tendancies - doing things without conscience. "Whoops" says it all.
#39
I’m not in love with my wife anymore but can’t leave because of the kids.
Edit: I’m in love with her sister. Who is also in an unhappy relationship
Loverboy 2 years ago
Staying together might not be the best thing for your kids, though. While divorcing would certainly be a process and it might be confusing, it might also be for the better. I would want any potential kids of mine to grow up seeing a loving relationship, not a forced one.
Upstaged75 2 years ago
Yeah I had a friend who stayed for the kids and they were all miserable. :(
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Averysleepypanda 2 years ago
I think not being in love with your wife anymore is fair, but being in love with the sister is a red flag to me. Is OP really not in love with his wife anymore or just getting bored and lusting after the sister? Marriage has ebs and flows. You are not always going to feel head over heels or in love with your partner all the time (especially in long term relationships of 10+ years). My partner and I had a horrible last year and almost seperated, but are getting back on track again with help (which I never thought possible). I hope OP at least tries to work things out with his wife (makes her aware of not feeling as in love anymore) first, before deciding to leave. Regardless of what he does though, the sister should be 100% off limits. That will destroy the entire family.
LandAhoy 2 years ago
I think Michael is saying that it's messed up how religions dictated that matrimony and monogamy is the only acceptable lifestyle, and he is pointing out that they have other options such as opening up their relationship, which works for some people. I don't know why he's being downvoted.
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Christine Watson 2 years ago
Never stay for the kids. The kids know and it's not helping them. Don't you want them to aspire to more for their own relationships? You are teaching them not to.
Alexandra 2 years ago
If you do decide to get a divorce, you might be careful getting into a relationship with your wife's sister, because that can cause a rift between the sisters and this rift can reverberate throughout the whole wider family, in which case the children will not be better off stress-wise.
sturmwesen 2 years ago
My mom married her former BIL years after the divorce. It did not seem to be an issue with my father, but it was weird as F for me for a long time. He should proceed carefully.
Load More Replies... raigrant01 2 years ago
I think that sometimes writing what we think is not a good medium. I read Michael's comment and to me it reads that he is stating that due to religion, we are led to believe that all relationships must be sanctioned, eg marriage. I think he is against this. But downvote away, Pandas....
Marina Rocha 2 years ago
I read as don't divorce and find other ways even non traditional ways. Which reads very oddly. But I don't get the downvote if don't agree thing. It's not how the platform works
Load More Replies... Nightshade1972 2 years ago
A friend of mine was in an abusive marriage for 22 years. When she finally decided to divorce him, she was afraid of what their kids (teens at the time) would think. When she finally worked up the courage to tell them, she was surprised when they responded with, "What took you so long?! Dad's a jerk!" Dad was very hit-or-miss with both supervised visitation, and child support payments. When my friend finally had his parental rights terminated, he couldn't show up to the court fast enough. Nobody's seen/heard from him since (no great loss), and she's now happily married to someone else.
Azure Adams 2 years ago
Get a divorce. The kids already know, they can pick things up and are very perceptive. Just end it. What are you teaching them about relationships by staying? "It's your job to keep mommy and daddy together even though we are miserable." That is what you are showing them. Would you want any of your children staying in relationships if they were unhappy? No you wouldn't! And you'd be shyte father if you did. Also, don't go after their aunt!! Pull your shyte together!!
#40
I did a favor for an organized crime figure in the 90’s.
#41
I stole and threw away my moms cigs as a kid I’ve punched my dad in the balls in his sleep and quickly hid before he even noticed( he was an a*s)
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
One time I cut the crotch out of all my dads underwear. He didn't notice until we went on vacation
Spocks's Mom 2 years ago
Ok. I'll bite. How the hell didn't your dad notice his stem and berries poking out the bottom of his bvds?
Load More Replies... Panda Kicki 2 years ago
I took my moms cig maker (this was the 80.s when many rolled their own) and prepped cigs with dry fish cat treats mixed up. I only did a few of them, mixed with a lot of normal, so she never knew when she was getting a nasty one.
Tessa 2 years ago
Panda Kicki, not sure if you just wanted to prank your mom, but I also see it as a fairly Innocent way of kids trying to make their parents quit bad habits. Smoking or being mean (as in OP their story). To me it shows the ways kids try to take control of the situation and change it for the better.
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#42
I like playing those cutesy cooking games on my phone. The ones that like we used to play as kids on our computers. And idk seems embarrassing to admit as an adult.
Jake B 2 years ago (edited)
Hey, mindless kids games are a way to relieve stress and enjoy a simple time. Go ahead and enjoy your games.
David Paterson 2 years ago
Growing old is obligatory. Growing up is optional. Feed your inner child.
HeavyMetalHeart 2 years ago
Every day I play a dress-up fashion game on my phone. I’m 46. It brings me great joy.
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
I still watch movies like the Land Before Time and Thomas and the Magic Railroad on a regular basis. By myself. it's ok
Benita Valdez 2 years ago
It's a fantastic stress relief. Besides, just because you're an adult doesn't mean you can't enjoy things
UpQuarkDownQuark 2 years ago
Don’t be embarrassed by that! You can watch Blue Clues and sing Baby Shark all day if it makes you happy.
#43
In high school I catfished my abusive ex and made him go to three different dates at different times only to stand him up. I made sure I was there with my two close friends but I didn’t tell them anything. Eventually I (the catfish persona) broke up with him saying the most awful things about him. The thing is I possibly made him worse. My revenge may have gone wrong
#44
My mom might have had an affair and my younger siblings might have been my half siblings…
Ken Beattie 2 years ago
More like they might be because the OP isn't game to ask.
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#45
In late 2017-early 2018 I was working retail and met a girl I liked, but she had a bf. We would hang out as just friends and I was fine with it until she decided one day she wanted to hook up. I was her side piece for months until one day she came to my house and asked me not to leave because I was supposed to move across the country in a couple weeks. Told me she was in love with me and was pregnant and didn’t know which of us was the dad, I moved early and never spoke to her again. Looked her up on IG a while back and they’re now married with a second kid on the way so I guess it worked out ok
Daffydillz~ 2 years ago
I guess it worked out well for the time being for both OP and her, but it's a shame that her boyfriend never had a choice in the matter. It's good if he loves and takes good care of the child but it will be heartbreaking if/when something happens one day and he finds out that the child isn't his. If it were OP's child, it's a shame that he doesn't care or want to know and just ran away. My son is going through something similar right now, his girlfriend cheated on him and he doesn't know if his son truly belongs to him, but the crazy town we live in thinks that it's adequate for his mother to testify under oath that the baby is his. Nevermind, the fact that DNA tests could tell us for sure, let's take the word of a cheater, who admitted to her family and ours that she stopped taking her birth control on purpose without my son's knowledge, as well as her other meds and has a dx of BPD. Sure, we should just take her word for it, smdh 😒. My son is just beside himself since he found out.
Kevin Hickey 2 years ago
The father of the child is the man who helps takes care of the child and raises the child. End of story.
Load More Replies... Katie Lutesinger 2 years ago
I wonder if in a decade or so they'll get a phone call or an email from someone saying "so I think you might be my bio dad..."
#46
My wife cheated on me multiple times, that’s not the secret though. She finally came clean to literally all of our friends and family and has done everything in her power to make amends with me and them and our relationship has been nothing but joy since… now for the secret part. So my wife has a terminal disease that I knew long before we were married would limit her lifespan, didn’t care I loved her all the same. I have given my heart and soul into caring for her and even more so as she has gotten older and her health has continued to decline. When/if the day finally comes I intend for the last thing she hears to be me saying I never forgave her.
kissmychakram 2 years ago
It won't upset her for long. You'll have to live with yourself for potentially a lot longer.
Bob Brooce 2 years ago
You know she'll probably be capable of answering, right? That's a door you might be really sorry you opened. Also, you're a major douche.
What do you think ?
EggisHeaven,Heavenwithface 2 years ago
hold on, i gotta pick up my jaw after reading these posts
Thenatural 2 years ago
I'm 50 yo...about 16 stone..beard..work in construction..happily married with 3 kids....on Saturday nights I watch strictly come dancing with my wife..religiously...
marianne eliza 2 years ago (edited)
I caretake my 92 year old parents, with the help of paid caregivers. Mom is quiet and easy. Dad is in the grip of severe, broad-spectrum dementia. He won't do anything anyone tells him to, just because he was told to do it. Like let's change your clothes, they're covered in pee or poop. No you can't use a chair because we locked up the ladders. Use your walker, Drink more fluids, wear your hearing aids, put in your teeth, don't turn off all the lights and TV just because you want to go to bed at 815p. He has no concept of personal bodily safety and is frequently falling. If anyone (except my brother) tries to insist, he gets mad and starts swinging. Every night I hope he goes to sleep and doesn't wake up. I maintain a low level high (it's legal here) and won't change my insufficient antidepressant because it's easier to feel nothing and stay numb.
Sky Render 2 years ago (edited)
Realizing that your birth is your parents' dark secret is a rough one, but that's what I had to deal with when I finally recovered my memories enough to realize that I'm intersex. They had a huge ruse going to make it seem coincidental that I was born at the only hospital for 500 miles where they "treated" intersex conditions. Spontaneously moving out to a town over a hundred miles away because of a "job opportunity" that even a cursory glance would reveal was set up by my grandfather on my mother's side. (Dad never worked in veterinary supply before or after that, and grandpa was a veterinarian.) None of my aunts or uncles ever twigged on in 40+ years.
LauraDragonWench 2 years ago
I hate my brother. As in, "I wish he would die" kind of hate. It wasn't always this way, but since my mom died back in 2011, my brother has tried to take her place in the family dynamics (as far as being the caregiver and glue of the family) and fails miserably. Being the narcissist that he is, he can't acknowledge this failure - instead it's everyone else's fault. It's gotten to the point where I wish I could cut off all ties and disappear. (Due to health and finance issues on my part, though, I can't because I have no other safety net other than what's left of my family.) I don't like feeling this way about my brother, but I also can't stop myself.
Poppy 2 years ago
Every day is an effort to even be alive. I wake up wishing I was 'normal' and that I didn't have ADHD, depression and anxiety, chronic fatigue (under investigation with my GP but still no known reason). I live alone, have no partner, no kids and I care for my mother who has Alzheimer's and a spinal injury. I'm tired of everything. I'm tired of feeling tired. I have intrusive thoughts about driving off a motorway bridge but I don't act on it. I just wish I had the energy to live every day and be able to work and do what I need to do. I'm just existing, not living.
EggisHeaven,Heavenwithface 2 years ago
hold on, i gotta pick up my jaw after reading these posts
Thenatural 2 years ago
I'm 50 yo...about 16 stone..beard..work in construction..happily married with 3 kids....on Saturday nights I watch strictly come dancing with my wife..religiously...
marianne eliza 2 years ago (edited)
I caretake my 92 year old parents, with the help of paid caregivers. Mom is quiet and easy. Dad is in the grip of severe, broad-spectrum dementia. He won't do anything anyone tells him to, just because he was told to do it. Like let's change your clothes, they're covered in pee or poop. No you can't use a chair because we locked up the ladders. Use your walker, Drink more fluids, wear your hearing aids, put in your teeth, don't turn off all the lights and TV just because you want to go to bed at 815p. He has no concept of personal bodily safety and is frequently falling. If anyone (except my brother) tries to insist, he gets mad and starts swinging. Every night I hope he goes to sleep and doesn't wake up. I maintain a low level high (it's legal here) and won't change my insufficient antidepressant because it's easier to feel nothing and stay numb.
Sky Render 2 years ago (edited)
Realizing that your birth is your parents' dark secret is a rough one, but that's what I had to deal with when I finally recovered my memories enough to realize that I'm intersex. They had a huge ruse going to make it seem coincidental that I was born at the only hospital for 500 miles where they "treated" intersex conditions. Spontaneously moving out to a town over a hundred miles away because of a "job opportunity" that even a cursory glance would reveal was set up by my grandfather on my mother's side. (Dad never worked in veterinary supply before or after that, and grandpa was a veterinarian.) None of my aunts or uncles ever twigged on in 40+ years.
LauraDragonWench 2 years ago
I hate my brother. As in, "I wish he would die" kind of hate. It wasn't always this way, but since my mom died back in 2011, my brother has tried to take her place in the family dynamics (as far as being the caregiver and glue of the family) and fails miserably. Being the narcissist that he is, he can't acknowledge this failure - instead it's everyone else's fault. It's gotten to the point where I wish I could cut off all ties and disappear. (Due to health and finance issues on my part, though, I can't because I have no other safety net other than what's left of my family.) I don't like feeling this way about my brother, but I also can't stop myself.
Poppy 2 years ago
Every day is an effort to even be alive. I wake up wishing I was 'normal' and that I didn't have ADHD, depression and anxiety, chronic fatigue (under investigation with my GP but still no known reason). I live alone, have no partner, no kids and I care for my mother who has Alzheimer's and a spinal injury. I'm tired of everything. I'm tired of feeling tired. I have intrusive thoughts about driving off a motorway bridge but I don't act on it. I just wish I had the energy to live every day and be able to work and do what I need to do. I'm just existing, not living.
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