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“Everyone Started To Look At Me Like ‘???’”: 86 Habits Neurodivergent People Thought Were Normal
There comes a time in every person’s life when they are forced to reconcile the fact that, actually, what they think is entirely normal doesn’t represent how the average person operates. If one happens to not be neurologically typical, then this might be the list for you.
Someone made a post stating “Neurodivergent folks, what’s a symptom you thought was normal until you realized it absolutely wasn’t?” and people shared their best examples. Note, many of the things here can be attributed to neurodivergence, but are not exclusive to it. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to write down and obsess over your own examples in the comments below.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Not hating showering itself but hating the task initiation.
Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
Very , also bathrooms are only cold if you don’t have heating in there , I have a rad via a air source heat pump housing assoc put in , ( they are NOT CHEAP TO USE 🤬) but it does keep the bathroom warm ,
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Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
It’s normal tbh , I can’t have baths cos of mobility issues ,once in I can’t get out without intense pain even on morphine n other meds , so got a shower over the bath , n climbing over to get in bloody hurts to. So I have to be able to get in ie pains not so bad on said day , so I’d say it’s normal tbh
RELATED:
#2
When people tell me a story, I tell them a similar story to try to relate. Ppl don’t like that they think I’m trying to make it about myself when I’m trying to empathize.
Zig Zag Wanderer 10 hours ago
This is so incredibly common. I tried hard to stop doing this decades ago, thinking I was being egotistical. I only recently discovered that all neurodivergents do it to some extent. It made me fell better.
Tinkershark 6 hours ago
To those who struggle with this, this helped me: they were asking you to share a burden they felt too weak to carry alone in that moment, instead we shared ours back. Picture them carrying a bag full of rocks, falling down, and asking if some of their rocks can temporarily go in your bag as they are feeling too weak to carry them all. You respond by saying "we have so much in common because my bag is heavy too! Will you take some of my rocks while I take some of yours?". That misses the point of what they needed, right? They might have happily helped carry your rocks in a different moment, but right now they feel weak and asked for your help. Giving them some of our rocks isn't kind or connecting.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I can't stop doing this! I try but it feels so intuitive and I don't know what else to say to show empathy other than the awkward, "I feel you" or "I'm sorry that must feel...." None of which are good things to say. I want to feel connections with others so I assume they want the same thing but people would prefer to feel special to the point of having nothing in common?
Tamra 4 hours ago
I find that people just want to feel seen and heard, truly heard. Saying "I feel you" or "I'm sorry, that must feel..." aren't bad things to say. It's a way of validating the other person's feelings.
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Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
Again normal , I do it to , to show people I know what they are going thru , ( apparently bullying trolls in here hate it , so childish ) very normal , pe Poole tend to open up more if they know you can actually relate !
Lady Eowyn 1 hour ago
I thought you were housebound and didn't interact with people.
Load More Replies... #3
Not actually “missing” many people or feeling the urge to talk to friends or anyone besides the people you’re around everyday. People are like out of sight out of mind.
Nat Rich 10 hours ago
I hate this one. My dad has cancer and I still forget to check in on him
Tinkershark 6 hours ago
I have found setting phone reminders helps. If possible maybe go through your phone calendar and set reminders on certain days at hours you aren't likely to be busy so you could check in as soon as the alarm goes? I understand it is not plausible for every situation and I don't know yours, but perhaps worth a shot? It doesn't mean we don't care that some of us need the extra planning, we didn't choose how we are wired, all we can do is know we care and try to work with what we have. Wishing you and your family as well as possible
Load More Replies... RM 4 hours ago
I have to have birthdays both on a calendar on the wall and on my phone just so I remember to call people on them. Sometimes there is even a post it note stuck to the fridge that says call x. Out of sight, out of mind is about right - it doesn't occur to me to check in with people, to call just because, but I always put it down to the fact I am just not a social person.
Earthquake903 5 hours ago
I do this. Moved from the deep south to the PNW. I do not miss anyone.
Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
Ok this isn’t ND this is introvert stuff. I love being on my own the peace , being housebound has brilliant advantages lol, no one around bar my two kids n their partners , beingveryrua also helps , it just mean WE DONT LIKE PEOPLE ,that isnt ND !
#4
Constantly googling things when I don't know. It boggles my mind that people don't know something and then just keep moving through life not knowing.....
DH 7 hours ago (edited)
You are right. This is just a personality trait, nohing more.
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Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
Normal , we do not know it all ! So if we don’t know being able to look on google is the best way 🤷♀️defo not to do with nd at all
SouthernGal 8 hours ago
Believing ridiculous things without bothering to fact check enrages me.
#5
I replay conversations I have with people in my head.. to try to determine if said the appropriate thing and I totally over analyze it. It can be exhausting...
mandy the capibara 1 hour ago
True, but I think a lot of neurodivergent traits are quite common, but the intensity of it, or the ability of a person to deal with it are very different.
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Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
Yup do it all the time ! Again normal , could I have said it better did this come across right , so that next time u get it right ,
#6
Always needing to know “why” and doing extensive deep research about random things only to completely lose interest a month or two later.
TheOGpandaHavana 9 hours ago
Story of my life! But the diversity of my random knowledge is both impressive and concerning.
Dirk Daring 17 minutes ago
I think part of this is that once I've looked up the WHY of something, and it makes sense, I can let go and just accept that there EXISTS a "why" of it. No need to hang on to the details, I am satisfied that there was some underlying logic supporting whatever it was I was looking up.
#7
Clearing my ENTIRE day to get ready for an event at 7pm.
RM 4 hours ago
I go the opposite way with this one - if I'm going to a Christmas party, for example, it takes me about half an hour to get ready. Takes longer to travel there than I spend prepping or getting ready.
Load More Replies... Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
Nope not me , but if I have to go out the house say docs or a birthday mine of my kids ,I do spend two weeks before mentally preparing myself to do so , I can’t be around people what so ever (empath hearing everyone else’s emotions feeling their pain happiness etc is bloody evacuating ) but only tells me ten mins to get ready , I’d call that being very vain n high maintenance not ND
Corbmi 3 hours ago
Am in that very spot right now; I'm scrolling BP instead of starting work I should have finished by now. My bosses are lucky to have me.
Load More Replies... #8
Brain radio! I thought everyone else was hearing music on repeat inside their head. 😭
Corbmi 4 hours ago
Mine only seems to work when I want to sleep, which is less fun at 2am and I have "if you like pina coladas" on repeat in my head. I've never even tried a pina colada. D**n you Rupert Holmes.
Load More Replies... TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I hate this soooo much! Sometimes it's worse than the endless dialogue in my head.
Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
That’s called an ear worm ! Perfectly normal , if you have an active mind , it’s actually a good thing to , all b. Bloody annoying , when it’s a shite sing u have on loop 😂but perfectly normal ! I gotta say if all these from top down so far are signs of being ND we all in in trouble.
Travelling Stranger 51 minutes ago
got the same thing, i call it a cassette player with endless cassette
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
This is normal right? My partner and I frequently comment on which song we have in our head, and then the other will reply with which song they have in theirs
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
It’s debilitating tbh, you’re trying to listen to someone while they’re yelling at you for being distracted but you end up distracting yourself as a random song you haven’t heard in years plays on loop in your head at a loud volume
#9
Hating obligations, they stress me out. Even fun ones.
#10
Having full conversations with myself in my head…
Colleen Glim 9 hours ago
I have full conversations with myself out loud. Some days it’s my only means of having an intelligent conversation
SouthernGal 8 hours ago
This usually makes me realize I need a nap to escape from myself.
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Tucker Cahooter 5 hours ago
I often have conversations with myself in my head but it usually degenerates into arguments and one of me telling the other me to just shut up
#11
I don’t know if there’s a word for it but just thoughts ALL the time about seemingly everything. If I’m interacting with someone I’m thinking about the way I’m sitting or standing, what they think of me, if I’m responding normally, eye contact, that random thing that happened 10 yrs ago and made me feel bad, am I nodding too much?” It takes me out of the moment. Makes me wonder how ppl genuinely enjoy things for a prolonged amount of time.
Rick Murray 8 hours ago
I find it mind blowing that people can have a period of "no thoughts". Like, you guys have an off switch?
Sue User 6 hours ago
Tried meditating several times. Just can't not think of something.
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#12
Instantly recognizing patterns.
TheOGpandaHavana 9 hours ago
I love patterns! I would not say that I'm good at recognizing them though. 😅
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
From seemingly unrelated things too, I was able to be good enough at physics and chemistry through pattern recognition
#13
Getting overwhelmed by environmental noise but always needing the right background noises.
Crystalwitch60 3 hours ago
Both me n my daughter are like this , but it’s normal , some like us just like peace , we couldn’t live in a town or city for eg , I get very easily overwhelmed int busy places , to much noise (other people’s emotions feelings etc it’s way to much ) n my daughter just likes peace , to
Toujin C'Thlu 9 hours ago
I like quiet, but absolute silence makes me feel like I'm in a horror movie
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
It is genuinely painful when there’s too much background noise, you feel like melting in that moment
Colleen Glim 9 hours ago
No background noise except for the noise of the world continuing past outside my window. I work retail. My world is nothing but people and noise. I can’t even with that when I get home
#14
Listening to one song on repeat for hours.
Crystalwitch60 4 hours ago
I’ve done this just means u love that song its your happy place , nothing more ,
Rick Murray 6 hours ago
This was pretty much my reaction to the entirety of "Legends of the Light" by Eye of Melian. It's basically aural dopamine.
#15
Object permanence, I don’t miss anyone or anything, is a struggle 😩
UnclFredstr:
Object permanence, especially with people. I can go months without communicating, and yet to me, when I do, it feels like just yesterday.
TheOGpandaHavana 9 hours ago (edited)
Yeah, this is hard for me to understand because I have it but I also have intense anxiety. Therefore I get incredibly anxious about future regrets for things I don't currently miss. It's a never-ending vicious cycle.
#16
Constant overthinking, ruminating, worrying, intrusive, racing thoughts. Until my 30s I thought everyone had the same & were just sailing through life not bothered by it.
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
I can't comment for everyone else, but I don't have that issue
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Papa 13 minutes ago
A lack of constant overthinking, ruminating, worrying, intrusive, and racing thoughts does not indicate an empty head.
Load More Replies... #17
Time blindness. I zone out and look at my phone and 2 hours have gone by.
Maya_D 4 hours ago
My husband is like this and it drives me crazy! We’re late for everything because he has no concept of time whereas I’m always aware of it.
Corbmi 3 hours ago
Same for my wife. I've taken to telling her that we need to be somewhere an hour before we actually do. We still end up being late, but only a little bit. Small victories and all that.
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E2U&U2 6 hours ago
Time blindness, wow, what a concept. All those years ago, when I was young and needed to be places, I would habitually lose track of time despite the honest steps I took to be on time. When I was late, and people would demand to know why, they just looked at me so crazy when I said, "I don't know what happened, I wasn't doing anything, I was getting dressed, I don't know where the time went."
Tinkershark 6 hours ago
People have acted like it is silly I will set alarms on my phone all the time, even for recreation and scrolling. I'm just trying not to void out, because time doesn't tick right for me. 10 minites can feel like an hour, an hour can feel like 10 minutes
#18
Forgetting a person's name straight after they've told you.
Corbmi 3 hours ago
I had to occasionally work with two chaps at another company. When I met them, one of them said "My name is Stu, like stew" and then acted out the motion of stirring a large pot of stew. That was over 20 years ago and I still remember his name. The other chap's name I would forget often. His first name is the same as my own.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
At this time in my "professional life", I REALLY REALLY need/wish I had the ability to remember people's names. It takes me months (or never!). I'm also face blind fora long time but definitely not as long as with names.
Sue User 6 hours ago
Curiously enough, remote work has helped because you see picture and name.
Load More Replies... #19
Wanting friends but unable to keep them bc I can’t ever seem to truly like a person once I get to know them.
TheOGpandaHavana 9 hours ago
The feeling always becomes mutual if I dare allow anyone to become more than a pleasant acquaintance.
#20
Countdown clock for everything. Apparently "getting ready to get ready to go" is not a normal thing.
Dirk Daring 14 minutes ago
I thought the image was reversed, but now I know that's just a stupid logo.
#21
Saying exactly what I mean but then being called rude when I was being legitimately neutral.
#22
Inability to sleep before any event the next day no matter how unimportant it is
#23
task initiation. 1. i cant do a task just by thinking i want to do it. i have to have an actual external push/drive. like cleaning my house, i mope around all day thinking i will clean i will clean. but tell me you be dropping by in 45 mins, and i can clean it all up. 2. I cant do anything alone, i need a body double to just be there with me even if they aren't doing the same thing im doing. 3. i cant just start and stop a task by my own. i could literally work all day with no breaks if no one tells me to do a bathroom break, or a meal break. so yeah. when I learned about that, I'm like, this is too complicated.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
So similar but it's more that if I stop to take a break, I won't be able to start again and sometimes it's almost impossible to stop even if I want/need to! I do things better alone than with someone but I definitely need external motivation.
#24
Having to train myself to make eye contact with people in conversation.
Rick Murray 8 hours ago
Which eye? Should I alternate? Stare between them? People demand eye contact then start to get creeped out when you put in the effort to do it - why?
Nat Rich 10 hours ago
Yeh then being too busy counting the amount of time you've held the eye contact to actually take in what they're saying lol
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
I didn't realise until I was in my thirties, possibly forties, that you were supposed to look people in the eye when you talk to them. I always looked at people's mouths, because that's where the sound comes from. Now I have to remember to do it (I usually go right eye).
#25
Pattern recognition, re-reading the same sentence/question 10 times and still not understanding, reading a whole page in a book and not even knowing what i read, food hyperfixations, rumination, hating showering because it’s a “big task” for me, not doing anything before a work shift (even if it’s at 4pm) because i’m afraid i won’t have time, listening to the same song over and over, overstimulation by crowds/loudness, getting overwhelmed/frustrated REALLY easily, over analyzing, i could probably think of more.
Papa 10 minutes ago
The only thing in this post that I recognized was reading a portion of a book and then not knowing what I read. In my case it's because part of my brain was reading, but another part had gotten distracted and was thinking about something else so what I had read hadn't sunk in. I don't know if that makes sense, but it's the best way I know to describe it.
#26
Predicting the end of movies, shows, conventions. Being human lie detector and not being able to put into words why I don’t like someone immediately.
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
I’ve been able to understand people’s personalities without having to interact with them so I rarely have proof when I dislike someone even though I’m usually right
#27
Having to do two things at once in order to pay full attention to one of those things. Example: playing a game on my phone in order to be able to pay attention to a lecture or meeting.
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
I used to doodle in my notebook during lectures for this reason but then my teacher told me to never do it again so I began fully zoning out and now he complains I don’t pay attention
#28
Maladaptive daydreaming, specially how it affected my memory.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
My problem is reading. I sometimes can't differentiate real and read memories.
LillieMean 1 hour ago
For me, this was a coping mechanism for trauma. When I healed enough from it, it has decreased significantly and I channeled the remaining daydreaming into writing as a creative person. I would completely zone out at school and the teacher sent me to the school psychologist. I am very grateful for that.
#29
Getting genuinely obsessed with something for a period of time only to then drop it and start the process all over again with something else that caught your interest.
LillieMean 1 hour ago
I'm a bipolar and I have a big shame box full of unfinished art projects, a bag of yarn balls and crochet projects I've started, and too many half-full notebooks.
[>.<]/ 13 minutes ago
I have given myself permission to let go of unfinished projects and just enjoy them while i'm working on them.
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Randomosity 7 hours ago
I'm sometimes afraid to get obsessed with a fandom because I know I'll eventually lose interest and it could be months before I come back, maybe even longer.
#31
I hate being in the kitchen doing anything if someone else is there😭
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I just hate being in the kitchen lol but extra if someone is there.
Toujin C'Thlu 8 hours ago (edited)
I feel like I can't do anything productive if someone else is in the room with me
#32
Needing lists of things. If I don’t have my checklist then i’ll probably forget half the things i was supposed to do.
Lady Eowyn 1 hour ago
I don't just have lists of things to do, but I keep lists of all sorts. Things I have, thing's I've read, things I want to tell someone, and so much more.
#33
Eating the same option for 3 weeks...then hating it for years 😭😂
Zig Zag Wanderer 10 hours ago
Ha ha! The number of times my cupboard or fridge gets filled with 'that thing I have to have all the time' once I suddenly stop wanting it is crazy!
Rick Murray 8 hours ago
Three weeks? I took the same ready meal to work every day for nearly six years. Now the thought of it makes me nauseous. So I'm taking a different one (the same) to work every day....
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I cannot make myself eat something if it's not currently what I'm "obsessed" with and its always sad when I end up having to throw stuff out because my cravings have changed it I've tried to ignore what I want. My brain would rather starve.
#34
Hating ice breakers. For some reason people genuinely like those.
Nat Rich 10 hours ago
Do people like them though or do they just say they do because they want to say the right thing? I cannot imagine a world where people genuinely like those lol
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago (edited)
Agreed! Although I was at one meeting last year where I said something similar and I got a few confused non-committal responses from my "group", so it could be true! I was convinced up until that moment that ice breakers are universally despised.
Load More Replies... Sally Moen 8 hours ago
The dreaded interview question "Tell me about yourself" used to throw me until I saw a YouTube video explaining that you can practice a short bit, and you don't need to actually tell them everything
Randomosity 7 hours ago
Why do I have to ask how your day is? You're just going to say good and expect me to say the same when you ask me, even though we could both care less about a random person's problems.
#35
Over explaining 😭😭 I need to keep everything short and sweet but then I feel like I’m not getting my point across good enough.
Zig Zag Wanderer 10 hours ago (edited)
Because people ALWAYS get something about it wrong because they make assumptions. It's frustrating, and that's why I put as much information in the initial description as possible. Definitely makes it less easy to tell or understand, though, so it's counter-productive. Catch 22!
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
And then they think you are being argumentative when you're simply trying to clarify and communicate effectively! It makes me more bonkers than I already am!!
Load More Replies... Papa 5 minutes ago
My wife does that. We can have a minor disagreement about something. She'll start to explain her point of view to me, I'll realize she's right, and say so, but she just keeps going. It's like she had a list of points to cover and she just can't stop halfway through, even though her goal has been accomplished. It's frustrating for me because it feels like she's still arguing for no reason.
#37
Over analyzing every interaction I have with another person. Rejection sensitivity. Extreme reactions to any type of music that tickles my brain and gives me a dopamine release.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago (edited)
All of that is so painful! Even the music. I do get dopamine but I also am easily negatively influenced. 😞
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
If someone reasonably criticises me I feel like a colossal failure because growing up I’d be shamed and beaten for showing basic human behaviour
#38
Reading for 30 minutes and having no clue what I just read.
Colleen Glim 9 hours ago
An indication that maybe I need to go find a new book. This one is not engaging me
#39
Extreme sensory issues. Have to be wearing socks 24/7. The air itself is a sensory issue.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I have extreme sensory issues for all of my senses. I'm the opposite about socks though! I hate them! I wear flip flops as much as possible outside and no socks/slippers inside.
Randomosity 7 hours ago
I love socks, but I have a heightened sense of touch. I have to wear pants to bed even though I'm hot natured because I can feel the hair on my legs rub against each other if I wear a gown. And I immediately know if a stray hair falls on my arm or if I get something under my nails.
#40
Behavioral pattern recognition and intuitively knowing what decisions people will make before they act. Also, having entire conversations in your head about hypothetical situations that could occur before you attend an event or have the actual conversation.
#41
When people are talking interrupting to ask questions. I thought I was actively listening… turns out you have to let people finish their sentences?
Zig Zag Wanderer 10 hours ago
I have a friend (neurodivergent but doesn't realise it) who constantly does this. Unfortunately, his mind works so fast that he can't be patient enough to listen to it all. It outright becomes impossible to tell him a story because of it, unfortunately.
#42
Not wanting to brush my teeth!
Sue User 6 hours ago
I cannot STAND mint toothpaste. Ugh. I was good for a while when they were adding charcoal to everything. Someone bought me strawberry, but it was way to sweet. And the foam, ugh! Found cinnamon mouthwash the other day and loving brushing now.
Sally Moen 8 hours ago
Add different ways to brush, including cheap electric toothbrushes, baby toothbrush (they are very tiny and soft), foam mouth swabs (used in hospitals and nursing homes for folks that cannot eat but still need their mouths cleaned), finger toothbrushes (similar to a rubber fingertip but with bristles on one side). Even a denture brush, but use lightly. Point is to have a variety of choices and like the other commentor here said, several flavors of toothpaste including non-sweetened (most regular toothpaste is sweetened with saccharin) and fruit flavored. I like to keep a box of baking soda open to use to brush my teeth for times when I cannot stand toothpaste for some reason.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago (edited)
It's not about flavors for me, I rarely use toothpaste anyway. I can't keep a habit. I become adverse to the action until it becomes a compulsion, then it happens until the next compulsion period or sometimes fear works too
Load More Replies... #43
Being able to know instantly when a new person is a not safe person.
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
When you’ve been hurt and used by many people throughout your life, you’ll be able to figure out who’s more likely to do the same to you again
#44
Coffee. I thought people were lying about their need for coffee in the morning because caffeine does nothing for me.
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
I don't understand why people are so obsessed with coffee, I hate it. But then I also think pizza is overrated so...
Papa 1 minute ago
You are not alone. My sister says she hates coffee but loves the smell. I dislike both. Also, I can eat pizza and enjoy it, but it's definitely not on my list of favorite foods.
Load More Replies... RM 4 hours ago (edited)
Some people just don't react to caffeine - I could drink the strongest coffee, one after the other, then go to bed and sleep fine. One of my colleagues at work is the same. Most people I know, however, claims the caffeine energises them or wakes them up. I drink it because I like the taste.
Colleen Glim 9 hours ago (edited)
Sometimes it’s more about the routine than it is about the caffeine. But don’t talk to me until I’ve had my coffee
#45
I can’t stand still, I have to rock side to side.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I'm constantly moving. It's so perplexing to be both extremely exhausted and feel like I can't stop moving or I'll explode.
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
My teacher and parents like to physically restrain me from moving back and forth or tapping my leg because they think it’s the sign of a disturbed person but what they can’t comprehend is that them restraining me disturbs me far more than me moving like that
#46
Having to listen to something to stimulate my brain so i can go to sleep, otherwise ill just be up thinking about any and everything.
Lady Eowyn 1 hour ago
I have to have the tv on or I can't get to sleep. I don't even look at it, but it has to be on.
#47
I can't listen when I'm making eye contact.
TheOGpandaHavana 9 hours ago
OMG this! Either you want me to LOOK like I'm paying attention or you want me to ACTUALLY listen but not look like I am but you definitely can't have both! Also, don't expect me to speak coherently if you want eye contact while I'm talking; I barely make sense without it. 😵
#48
I don't like lights. I want the house dark no lights. My bedroom is very dark. That's where I want to be
zububonsai 7 hours ago (edited)
I hate too bright light in the early mornings (I call my ceiling lamp in the kitchen "interrogation lamp" ). I start with little lights scattered in different corners instead and a 5 candles holder on the kitchen table. (the "hygge" concept of lighting rooms). When I'm "awake" enough I can switch on "the big light".
LillieMean 1 hour ago
When I moved in with my husband, he had a floor lamp whose shade made the light a horrible, ugly, dingy color. It came with several shades and they were all horrible. He agreed to sell it and I wrote in the sales text that the lamp comes with different shades of replacement shades that create different mood lighting in your home such as a morgue, a dungeon, a brothél and a prison. I just wondered why someone bought it and whose dungeon it is now lighting.
#50
The constant second guessing of everything I do or feel, making things harder than they are, being able to feel what others are thinking and assuming they hate you, completely underestimating how long it takes to do things.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I feel so seen with this one. I think more than any of the others. 😭
#51
Chatter in my mind, always thinking always ruminating making up scenarios, making up entire new worlds, navigation skills, time anxiety and being soooo prompt, taking things literally, pattern recognition to point I can tell the future based on it 😅 ocd but messy too.
#52
Never being able to remember people's names, forgetting words in the middle of speaking, losing track of what I was trying to write because I couldn't write fast enough and my brain won't slow down, forgeting appointment is, forgetting homework. Basically everything that has to do with working memory. I am very lucky to live in a time when supports are readily available and culturally acceptable.
#53
Justice sensitivity to the extent of self detriment.
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
It genuinely distressed me and made me miss out on so many opportunities and memories because I had such a strong sense of justice even when it wasn’t ever necessary
#54
High emotions for everything and having a hard time getting over things… I’d mad for days if you let me.
Nat Rich 10 hours ago
Oh I'm the opposite about getting over things and it annoys me. If I'm wronged I forget why and I struggle to hold a grudge. Which might sound good but some people deserve a grudge to be held.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
Haha I forget the reason but not the grudge feeling!
Load More Replies... Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
Still upset at that kid who said he wouldn’t invite me to his party back in kindergarten
#55
Remembering EVERY. THING. I was well into my thirties before I realized that most people do not remember every single detail of most situations. 😅
Stardust she/her 2 hours ago
I’ve got working memory from when I was 4-6 months old and can remember nearly everything that’s ever happened to me and what was said to me by everyone. I remember everyone’s faces, their personalities etc and what I was thinking during each of these moments. I can remember before I could think. It’s exhausting
Randomosity 7 hours ago
I wish I had that problem. I literally forget something after it's told to me.
#56
Captioned speech. I thought everybody spelled spoken words in their head???
Sally Moen 8 hours ago
Closed captions used to be rare before the 1990s in the US, now it's so very common, and I'm very grateful.
#57
Feeling like I’m watching myself live in 3rd person.
#58
Ruminating to the point it keeps me up at night and I make myself physically sick, avoiding eating certain foods altogether bc I don't like the texture, safe foods or "fixation meals", non-linear grief, lack of maintaining a self care schedule and lacking time management... I could keep going but yeah.
Lady Eowyn 1 hour ago
I've always had a thing about food textures, it was explained when I got diagnosed with autism at 69. I don't like to eat around people because of the comments I've gotten over the years.
#59
Intellectualizing emotions instead of processing them.
Gail Lott 7 hours ago
My therapist would always have to stop me and say, “I didn’t ask you what you THINK about it, I asked you how you FEEL about it.” I would be stumped.
Sue User 6 hours ago
This reminded me of the time I had to write an art paper in college. Just two pages: light composition, coloring,etc. Had a friend read it. " But you never said how you feel about it". I looked at the assignment and said " It doesn't ask for that".
Load More Replies... TheOGpandaHavana 9 hours ago
I don't even know what that means or what they are trying to say here. I have very little emotional regulation, so there is definitely an extreme lacking of intelligence applied to them. 😂
#60
CONSTANTLY misplacing/losing things and then consequentially having a full blown meltdown over not finding it as a full grown adult.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I've gotten better on the second half of that but it also depends on my level of being overwhelmed at the time.
#61
Being able to hear electricity.
Sue User 6 hours ago
No, you can hear it in the big towers. Sometimes in the house. Definitely hear the motors on things, and no they are not dying. I have a service call to prove it.
Load More Replies... #62
Not ever having an agenda book or planner work for me longer than maybe three days😂
#63
I did not realize people genuinely do not see an issue with things being moved/touched. I tell my coworkers constantly "if you use my stuff, put it back EXACTLY where you found it" but they just toss it on my cart instead. it makes me irrationally upset. It's MY STUFF, why are you touching it.
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
I fired my cleaner because she did not put things back where they were supposed to go and it annoyed me so much
#64
I am a synesthete – I feel different sounds in my body (pressure/vibration/pulling/...), which I only became aware of when I put on noise-cancelling headphones for the first time and all these bodily sensations suddenly stopped. The sensory overload caused by AuDHS therefore has a double impact.
Stardust she/her 1 hour ago
Huh, interesting. I didn’t know that this was a type of synaesthesia. I’ve got synaesthesia which allows me to associate colours and personalities to things like numbers, letters, music etc. Hell, I can even associate movements with sound so I don’t need audio when watching videos if I have subtitles, I can just piece together all the sounds in my brain without putting any actual mental effort. I used to have another synaesthesia as a kid where if a movie character felt pain then I’d also feel it. I couldn’t watch action movies growing up as I’d feel pain where a character got shot
#65
Having to read someone's lips to understand what they are saying.😭😭😭
Nat Rich 10 hours ago
Yes! This is why I hate telephone calls with a passion but I'm absolutely fine with a zoom call
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
I too hate telephone calls but am fine with Zoom, but it's not an auditory issue. I think I must just really need body language and facial expressions to be able to confidently hold a conversation.
Load More Replies... TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I didn't know this about myself until COVID! I really struggle to understand people when I can't see their mouth moving. I thought it was because I'm not an auditory learner.
#66
Organizing my shirts in the color of the rainbow with matching hangers.
#67
Being gifted. I could read early, learn multiple languages from library books, do advanced college classes in middle school, and I was a speed reader.
Sally Moen 7 hours ago
Turns out speed reading isn't a job skill needed these days. Nor is being able to read upside down text
#68
Immediate and severe 2nd hand embarrassment even though it has nothing to do with me. Intense and complete full conversations in my head before speaking. Pacing while on the phone. Needing to do everything in order ie there are 3 houses- have to go to house 1, first house 2, second etc., watching the same movie, shows, or books that I know every word to on repeat., unable to wear mismatch socks without anxiety, cutting every nail and filing them because one nail broke.
Nat Rich 9 hours ago
I feel like keeping socks in pairs is a skill I haven't mastered. I wear odd socks because life is too short
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
I find the easiest way to match your socks is to do it whilst hanging up the washing. So I'll hang one sock and leave a space next to it until I pull the other one out of the basket. I couldn't wear odd socks every day.
Load More Replies... #69
Randomly thinking “touch that object or something really bad will happen.”
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
Haha! This was me as a kid all the time! It's rare now, but I'm still really superstitious about jinxes.
#70
Avoiding showering because I don’t like the feeling of wet hair. But I love being clean.
Stardust she/her 1 hour ago
I hate hate hate wet hair so much! It’s uncomfortable and I can’t do anything on days when I have wet hair. Doing anything in wet hair feels painful at times and washing my hair ruins the entire day. I have to prep myself for one hour on hairwashing days
Sally Moen 7 hours ago
I imagine the future of cleanliness will appeal to you then, with sonic showers already a reality.
#71
Derealization/depersonalization. Literally thought everyone had those, until I randomly started to ask around and everyone started to look at me like "???" when I described it.
#73
Being able to automatically identify other neurodivergent people.
#74
Limerence 😭
Daisydaisy 3 hours ago
OMG yes! This is a real thing and has been by far the closest I've ever come to total insanity, several times in my life. Terrifying
#75
Needing a plan for every single plan so i know what and when i can do my routine for getting ready and if there’s no plan im extremely confused and don’t know what to do.
#76
Listening to a song 5000 times until you find a new fixation. Repetitive actions (I twirl my hair into a pattern repeatedly) without even thinking about it.
General Anaesthesia 3 hours ago
Spotify tends to make a song inaccessible if you listen to it too often in a short time. They have no sympathy for your need to hear it.
#77
Trying to understand why some people did what they did almost obsessively is so bad learnt to only care about WHAT HAPPENED not WHY it happened.
TheOGpandaHavana 8 hours ago
I make my husband angry regularly by trying to understand why he did or didn't do something. He makes me angry regularly by not being interested in understanding why I did or didn't do something.
#79
Always counting 😭😭😭why am I counting how many times I typed A😭😭5 btw
Rick Murray 8 hours ago
Yes. Half the time I forget what I'm counting so have to start again. Music is good for this, especially prog rock - one two three four five six seven one two three four five six seven...
#80
Loading the dishwasher in a very certain way.
Stardust she/her 1 hour ago
I think my dad must be ND as he yells at us when the dishwasher isn’t loaded according to how he likes it
#81
Getting irrationally upset and not being able to comprehend when someone doesn’t like the same things as me.
Stardust she/her 1 hour ago
As a kid (and even now) my special interest has been astronomy and I struggled with the concept that not everyone liked astronomy. Some kids would tell me to shut up and I could never understand how they would only talk about cartoons and not about space.
#82
Moving from room to room and cleaning it my mind was blown when I found out people don’t actually clean this way. I thought it was a flex now I’m cleaning paralyzed.
TheOGpandaHavana 7 hours ago (edited)
I clean like those images of spider webs woven by spiders given caffeine and other stimulants. 😂
Zig Zag Wanderer 10 hours ago
Unfortunately, my cleaning paralysis has been ongoing for 60 years or more....
#85
I thought everyone was aware of how loud they were crunching when eating crunchy things.
Stardust she/her 1 hour ago
Some girl in my class yesterday ate chips in such a bad way. She was sitting at the back and I was sitting at the very first bench but I could hear everything; the way her lips smacked, the way she sucked and crunched the chips etc. How are people not self aware?
#86
My pedantic speech, everyone says I’m “well spoken” no, I have a large vocabulary and speak like this mainly because it brings me comfort knowing nothing I said is left for interpretation. Any misunderstanding is entirely the other person’s fault.
What do you think ?
David Paterson 7 hours ago (edited)
Few if any of these are remotely "neurodivergent". I have almost all of them. Now excuse me while I publish a lecture on infinite numbers.
[>.<]/ 5 minutes ago
OK thanks. I was genuinely worried I might be neurodivergent, because I have/ do all of these things.
Load More Replies... Lotekguy 9 hours ago
A lot of these seem to be people worrying about abnormalities that aren't really there. Everybody's got a lot more going on inside their head than what they express, or that others can perceive.
Trillian 6 hours ago
And just because you have something as a neurodivergent person doesn't necessarily mean it is a symptom or sign of neurodivergence.
Load More Replies... Zig Zag Wanderer 9 hours ago
My biggest problem was discovering that most people don't think like me. They don't need to understand how things work. They're constantly amazed when I explain the things I have obsessed over, and worked out and they never noticed. It took me years to find this out, and by then ALL my friends are neurodivergent, because they can understand these obsessions!
DH 7 hours ago
Lists like this are a bit dangerous I think, because people read this and when some things here fit their personality they go "I'm neurodivergent". You are not unless you went to a doctor for a diagnosis. Lots of these are just personality traits. Normal deviations from the norm. Don't fret about it and if it is a debilitating problem, seek help.
Lady Eowyn 1 hour ago
Most of these have nothing to do with being neurodivergent, they're just average human traits. So, people, if you haven't been diagnosed as neurodivergent, don't let any of these make you think you are. If it bothers you enough, talk to a doctor.
Multa Nocte 1 hour ago
Arrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!!! Junk article full of misconceptions, says this clinical psychologist. Everyone wants to have a label or try to explain things that are mysterious or irritating about themselves, but almost every one of the things listed here happens in the great majority of people to some extent or another. Don't use a misguided list like this to compare yourself against, especially since this is a compilation of people who may not even have been diagnosed talking about things that THEY think are uncommon. Most of what I have read here is occurs to an extent in almost everybody. If you seriously think you are neurodivergent and you have some sort of need for a label, please find a qualified clinician who has experience with neurodivergent people. Sorry for the rant.
Lady Eowyn 1 hour ago
Thank you! That's what I was saying. As I learned more about autism, I recognized a lot of things about myself, so I talked to my psychiatrist. I have major depressive disorder, anxiety with panic attacks, and PTSD. She (the psych) was the one who finally listened and said, yes, I do have autism.
Load More Replies...
Sue User 5 hours ago
Okay, I have a question. Do you all dream of people and places you know, or of new places and people you don't know?
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
Both, but probably more often ones that I don't know (that said, I rarely recall my dreams)
Load More Replies... Littlemiss 6 hours ago
Only halfway through and its scary how many fit. I can't sit still, can't even stay still in my sleep. I fidget nonstop, then I discovered its actually stimming. No diagnosis, yet.
David Paterson 7 hours ago (edited)
Few if any of these are remotely "neurodivergent". I have almost all of them. Now excuse me while I publish a lecture on infinite numbers.
[>.<]/ 5 minutes ago
OK thanks. I was genuinely worried I might be neurodivergent, because I have/ do all of these things.
Load More Replies... Lotekguy 9 hours ago
A lot of these seem to be people worrying about abnormalities that aren't really there. Everybody's got a lot more going on inside their head than what they express, or that others can perceive.
Trillian 6 hours ago
And just because you have something as a neurodivergent person doesn't necessarily mean it is a symptom or sign of neurodivergence.
Load More Replies... Zig Zag Wanderer 9 hours ago
My biggest problem was discovering that most people don't think like me. They don't need to understand how things work. They're constantly amazed when I explain the things I have obsessed over, and worked out and they never noticed. It took me years to find this out, and by then ALL my friends are neurodivergent, because they can understand these obsessions!
DH 7 hours ago
Lists like this are a bit dangerous I think, because people read this and when some things here fit their personality they go "I'm neurodivergent". You are not unless you went to a doctor for a diagnosis. Lots of these are just personality traits. Normal deviations from the norm. Don't fret about it and if it is a debilitating problem, seek help.
Lady Eowyn 1 hour ago
Most of these have nothing to do with being neurodivergent, they're just average human traits. So, people, if you haven't been diagnosed as neurodivergent, don't let any of these make you think you are. If it bothers you enough, talk to a doctor.
Multa Nocte 1 hour ago
Arrrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!!! Junk article full of misconceptions, says this clinical psychologist. Everyone wants to have a label or try to explain things that are mysterious or irritating about themselves, but almost every one of the things listed here happens in the great majority of people to some extent or another. Don't use a misguided list like this to compare yourself against, especially since this is a compilation of people who may not even have been diagnosed talking about things that THEY think are uncommon. Most of what I have read here is occurs to an extent in almost everybody. If you seriously think you are neurodivergent and you have some sort of need for a label, please find a qualified clinician who has experience with neurodivergent people. Sorry for the rant.
Lady Eowyn 1 hour ago
Thank you! That's what I was saying. As I learned more about autism, I recognized a lot of things about myself, so I talked to my psychiatrist. I have major depressive disorder, anxiety with panic attacks, and PTSD. She (the psych) was the one who finally listened and said, yes, I do have autism.
Load More Replies... Sue User 5 hours ago
Okay, I have a question. Do you all dream of people and places you know, or of new places and people you don't know?
highwaycrossingfrog 1 hour ago
Both, but probably more often ones that I don't know (that said, I rarely recall my dreams)
Load More Replies... Littlemiss 6 hours ago
Only halfway through and its scary how many fit. I can't sit still, can't even stay still in my sleep. I fidget nonstop, then I discovered its actually stimming. No diagnosis, yet.
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