Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
No matter who you are or what you see and hear on social media, there is no such thing as a ‘perfect’ parent. Let’s repeat that so everyone in the back hears it, too: There’s no such thing as a ‘perfect’ parent! Absolutely everyone makes mistakes—they’re a part of the process. And there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to raising kids well.
You can tell a lot about a person by how they react to any mishaps you make or when they do something different than you. Some will be supportive or offer useful advice, while others reveal themselves to be incredibly judgmental and beyond critical. To show you what we mean, we’ve collected some of the worst stories about parents getting ‘mom shamed’ by others, as shared in an online thread. Scroll down for a crash course in how not to treat other parents.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
For having my two year old son on a toddler leash (cute backpack that looks like a rocket). He's a fast little fellow who doesn't understand not to run off or in front of cars, and I'm too pregnant to chase him.
Some guy came up to me at the grocery store and said, "You have him on a leash like a dog?!"
I just said, "Yup!" and kept walking.
Not giving my time to such judgy jerks.
Gingersnap In Iowa 8 months ago
I used a toddler leash on my son. People either gave me encouragement or grief.
Ms.GB 8 months ago (edited)
My Grandma was like "I think they're wonderful! I would've had your father on a leash if they had them back in my day." 😆
Load More Replies...
Jungle Empress 85 8 months ago
I have neither a child nor a dog, but I always assumed one would leash a toddler for the same reason dogs are leashed. It's better than having your child/dog suddenly run out onto a busy street.
V 8 months ago
We did because our kid walked fairly early and it was killing our backs leaning sideways to hold their hand because they were so short. The backpack was a fuzzy monkey and was like being cuddled bya soft toy, and gave a sense of independence. Absolutely no downside to them.
Load More Replies...
Edda Kamphues 8 months ago
Better a living child in a leash than a dead one running free. I had one for my daughter because she thought it was funny when I ran after her.
Pamela Carter 8 months ago
I had one for our third son. He walked at 7 months and could outrun and Olympic sprinter. At 2 he pulled loose from my Mom and was almost hit by a car. One of my grandsons was similar. For some kids that tether is a matter of life or death. Little kids are curious and don’t always think before they do! Make no mistake—these are usually very smart kids, just too little to see the danger. The grandson got out of the house so much they had to add a deadbolt lock that used a key on the inside. I really think of that tether as an umbilical cord—not a leash. It is a life saving measure. BTW—my tethered tot is now an attorney with a law degree from Duke with an escape artist of his own!
Load More Replies...
Cee Cee 8 months ago
Yeah the leash. My sister was a bolter. We were walking through Rome airport back in the late '50's. My dad had her on reins. She slipped out and legged it. She disappeared and the flight down to Uganda had to be delayed. Retrieved from the airport kitchens where the Italian chefs were feeding her scrambled eggs!
Glen Ellyn 8 months ago
Wow. That's quite an adventure she had. Still scary, though.
Load More Replies...
Crystalwitch60 8 months ago
Hell yes I’m in the uk n 60 yrs old I remember this as clear as day bloody awful it was , they do also keep em safe from scum as wants to abduct the kids to , I’ve never forgotten about it n I had my kids at 35-39 n I gotta say it made me a very observant parent n reins where a must once they started walking
Load More Replies...
Sally Horrocks 8 months ago
I walk my dogs on a lead to keep them safe, surely children deserve the same?
Kristin 8 months ago
Please don't judge me but I was the jerk that would give side eye when I seen kids on leashes. That was before I had my daughter and then it was then I realized why people had them. Not only for the kiddos who are quick but the world we live in isn't safe and so many kids are getting taken with their parents right next to them. I've seen way too many videos of people trying to take kids from a table at a restaurant or the buggy at the store. My daughter is 15 now and I'm still so scared when she's not near me or in my eyesight. I have so much anxiety when she goes with her dad cause I'm not there and I know how he is. So this is a huge sorry to the parents I offended 😕
ILoveMySon 7 months ago
Exactly. My cousin was a very rambunctious. My aunt would use one and tie it to a long rope when he played outside because at THREE, he drove her car into a ditch. In those days keys were left in the ignition. Where was she? She went inside to use the toilet quickly. The local police officer told her to get a tether.
Load More Replies...
Nobody Special 7 months ago
I used one on my middle child and didn't care what anyone thought but no one said a word to me or is have had a few word suggestion to offer back!
Judy Reynolds 7 months ago
Many years ago, I had one of those BIG baby carriages - maybe 4 feet long - and my seven month old baby harnessed and attached to both sides. She stood up and started peering over the side. The person behind me gasped and said "Oh! That's why!" My daughter would have landed on her head without the harness.
Stannous Flouride 7 months ago
Never really understood until I took my 4 y.o. daughter to an urban county fair.
Huddo's sister 8 months ago
My mum was against these until her third and fourth children, who would run and climb anywhere in the blink of an eye.
Sian E 8 months ago
I work as a school crossing patrol (aka crossing guard) and I WISH more parents would use reins or backpack tethers on their little ones. This week alone I witnessed 5 children under 4 heading straight for the road with a parent either chasing them or being straight up oblivious.
Cerise Hood 8 months ago
There was a story about a mom shopping in a grocery store with her kid on a leash. A stranger suddenly grabbed the kid and started to run. If it weren't for the leash, then it would have ended a lot differently. Why not give people grace before giving them grief?
Aussi Panda 8 months ago
I had one for my daughter because she would run around the shopping centre towards the doors & I thought she would run into the car park & get hit by a car. So stressful 😩
Betsy S 8 months ago
I do wish people would call them a harness. That's like what you'd wear for parachuting, rock climbing, etc. It's a perfectly dignified image. Calling it a "leash" brings to mind unruly dogs and treating your children like animals instead of like adventurers. It's a HARNESS, not a leash!
Panda Bear 8 months ago
I don’t like kids on leashes but I also know to keep my opinions to myself
Crystalwitch60 8 months ago
Here in uk they are called baby reins lol I’m 60 ,used em on my kids they 24-21 this yr now , but when I was little they where a huge thing ! n imo still should be cos it gives the kids freedom but also keeps the, safe from speeding cars oh and from being snatched to nothing what so ever wrong with them !
Boo 8 months ago
I learned that after my youngest started walking that the leashes were truly a life saver after they both ran off in different directions in a busy city centre. So many thanks to the lovely older woman who stopped my eldest from running into the street (eldest used to love trying to catch the pigeons).
RELATED:
#2
Some people- and it always seems to be older women- just love to comment/criticize. The two nastiest comments I've gotten are about how I let my daughter walk everywhere (what else would I do?) and that she shouldn't be playing in the dirt because it wasn't ladylike (ma'am she one, nothing about her is ladylike, and also she loves dirt and rocks).
#3
I got shamed for ordering my almost two year old son water at a restaurant instead of milk or juice. He likes to drink water, what do you want from me?
Savannah greenleaf 8 months ago
What? At two it is perfectly fine to have water. Juices are sugar loaded, and at that age they are past formula. My kids pediatrician only recommended a certain amount of cows milk when they were toddlers.
In a nutshell, mom shaming is when someone judges or criticizes a mom for her parenting style or choices. Choosing Therapy points out that even though this can sometimes come from a place of concern or a lack of knowledge about the context of the situation, it does more harm than good. The result? Insecurity. Anxiety. And self-doubt.
Some people have either very outdated or extremely unrealistic expectations of the role that moms supposedly ‘should’ have in raising their children. In some cases, the critics are extremely stubborn and believe that their approach to parenting is the one and only way to do things ‘right.’
Other times, the individual may be narcissistic or have serious self-esteem issues, so they feed their ego or feel better about their insecurities by putting other people down. It’s not far from bullying. Meanwhile, there are also those parents for whom raising children is a competition, so they constantly compare themselves to others and vice versa.
#4
That I whistled at her and she immediately returned to my side. Our boxer is trained to different whistles (and word/hand commands), we have land that we can hike with him being off leash. He never ventures far off, rarely out of eye sight, but does his last zoomies as we load up 4.5yo in the vehicle. She's learned what the different whistles mean, and will also respond to them. Each of us have our own "name" whistle to call our attention before next whistle.
Apparently I've trained her like a dog if I use the freeze/stop/come here/eyes on me whistles without thinking while at the park or grocery store.
Nope. We just live out in the county and use whistles vs yelling as my voice gives out easily when my sinuses are pissed off.
Becca not Becky 8 months ago (edited)
I was swimming in Miami at the beach once as a teen. There were a lot of people so it wasn't exactly quiet, but I heard my grandmother's unmistakable whistle and that's when I saw everyone running out of the water. There was a shark. Whistling carries quite well, and I'm glad for it.
#5
When my son was 6 months old, my husband and I were chastised by a catholic priest in a hospital elevator. We were told “it’s ridiculous that one of you couldn’t stay home with your child. A hospital is no place for a baby.”
My son was the patient—he had been diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder the week before. We were there to get some baseline tests done.
I was so stunned I couldn’t say anything. My husband told him to mind his own business and informed him that my son was there for a heart echo. That priest stfu really quickly, but didn’t apologize.
#6
I was shamed by a co worker for having my first kid soooooo young. I was 20 when I had my first, she was f*****g 22....I've never wanted to smack someone so hard. .
According to Choosing Therapy, some of the main ways in which other people shame moms include criticizing their choice to stay at home and breastfeeding choices. Mom-shamers also often judge non-traditional parenting roles, other parents’ children’s development, sleep training, and kids’ activities.
Stopping mom shaming means working on yourself, your perspective, and how you interact with the world. For one, you should stop comparing moms to each other. You also ought to think about each mom’s personal strengths, offer your support instead of being judgy, and also take a look at any self-esteem issues that you might have.
#7
I'm sorry, some people can be so rude and grumpy.
Last week, I had a woman at the swimming pool complain that my child was too loud. During public swim at a community pool. He was just laughing!
I'm trying not to take it to heart, but it is stuck in my head, and I'm so disappointed in people sometimes.
#8
I had to go to the pharmacy to get myself medicine and I had all 3 of my kids (5, 3, and 1 at that time) with me in 2021. The female tech at the counter told me I shouldn’t be bringing my little kids with me and should leave them at home. I told her I have zero childcare and it’s just me, she argued back that I could have found someone.
#9
I got mom shamed for choosing a natural birth without an epidural as well as breast feeding lol! People are wild. Give yourselves all the grace in the world ❤️.
Tilly’syellowsnowman 8 months ago
If anything, they should be looking up to you! Labor pain is NO joke
You should also practice being more compassionate, think of the things you’re grateful for in life, focus on a growth-oriented mindset, and give other moms the benefit of the doubt. It often helps to reflect on what your own parenting journey was like and what challenges you faced.
Have you ever had anyone start shaming you for your parenting style, choices, or blunders, dear Pandas? How did you react to them? Where do you personally think the line between concern and criticism lies? From your perspective, what is a way to offer helpful parenting advice while also being supportive?
#10
Leaving an event when my toddler was tired and about to have a meltdown, but not “noticing she was tired way earlier and leaving before she got to this point”.
#11
One of my kids is a T1 and we were in line once and his pump goes off letting us know he’s low. So we check his blood sugar and he treated. Then my youngest asked if he can have some candy too and because he had been behaving and hadn’t had a treat in a while I said sure and he has some too.
This older lady turns around and tells me I’m going to give my other kid the diabetes too. So my t1 (then 10) looks at her and said that’s not how type 1 diabetes works. My pancreas doesn’t make insulin that’s why I have a pump which gives me my insulin and I have to much insulin which is why I need the candy and how about you not tell me mom what to do and keep your opinion to yourself and b**t out. She then looks at me and says aren’t you going to parent your child and I said why should I when he’s right. You should b**t out.
Normally I would have made a smart a*s comment that will purposely embarrass her but he was tired and annoyed and he was quick to the punch.
#12
My daughter 7 at the time who has autism and adhd she has no concept of watching where she’s going etc she accidentally ran into a lady’s trolley (shopping cart) she yelled at her and I mean she actually yelled at her. to watch where your going .. I went off at her “ she has a disability you stupid b***h” a lady walking behind me congratulated me for putting her in her place.
Glen Ellyn 8 months ago
Good for you! Some people really need to be put in their place. Glad you got assurances from the woman behind you. You were justified.
#13
Breastfeeding and not pumping so “no one else can feed him”.
Tilly’syellowsnowman 8 months ago
Maybe that’s not a bad thing if these are the type of people he’s around…
#14
I’m sorry you had to deal with that. People are just so rude!
When my son was about 15 we were at Home Goods. I picked up a comforter in one of those plastic bags. It was kinda bulky to carry but not heavy.
The 60-ish year old cashier gave me a disapproving look and said very rudely- “Mom you should be teaching him to carry these things for you”
I’m not really sure what I even said but I was so mad. Yeah he could’ve carried it but it wasn’t necessary. She doesn’t know the things he does for me around the house.. I can’t stand people sometimes.
Brittania Kelli 8 months ago
People go on at me about not giving my teen specific chores to do. Their generation is the first generation that has a very good chance of living to 100. Retirement ages will raise to 85-90 at this rate. They are going to have to work from 60-70+ years. For 18 years they can be a kid, for 18 years they can be carefree, there are so many years for them to be responsible and adult. Saying that I do teach them house care basics so they can have the tools needed when they do go to Uni or wherever, they just don't have chores.
#15
I was once mom shamed for getting a bottle of wine at the grocery store. The woman was older and went on a tangent about how irresponsible it was for me to drink. She even said "if you drink and fall asleep he could k**l himself"
Some people have experienced some terrible things and seen some things and they project. It was just a crazy experience. I left the store and was like I should have gotten a second bottle 🤣 just kidding.
#16
Existing without my daughter. I dropped her off at preschool and then took my dogs for a walk before logging into work, my b***h neighbor gave me a snide “oh where’s the baby? Must be *so nice* to have a break!”.
DrBronxx 8 months ago
I wonder if OP was reading into this or not. If it was delivered like it says here, then the neighbor does suck, but could it have been an actual comment saying that it genuinely must be nice to have a break? Because it is nice to have a break sometimes. Can't wait for mine tonight after my daughter goes to bed. I'm going to crack open a beer and watch The Studio!
#17
I once got scolded for not spending “enough” one-on-one time with my then two-year-old. My husband and I had been home for maybe a week from the hospital with my second baby and were in survival mode.
Edda Kamphues 8 months ago
I once asked my husband to please change our daughter's nappy (I was utterly exhausted). My SIL came in: why don't YOU do it. The relationship has never recovered.
#18
Just recently, I took my son out to Kemah, he just turned 4. He is taller than average, so maybeeee there was some confusion... BUT- he has just started amping up on potty training. It was just me and him there, lots of people. I took him into the woman's restroom nearby because there was no family section close, and he needed to go immediately. Once we came out of the stall, this mom who was helping her daughter wash her hands next to us (doing the same) was giving me a dirty look... she just kept looking at me, then my son, then back at me like I'm doing something incredibly horrible by taking my child to the potty.
What am I supposed to do?
It's not like I can just send him in alone to the crowded adult men's room and ask some stranger to help assist with getting him on the toilet. 🙄🤦♀️.
#19
My kid had the most severe dairy allergy his pediatrician office had seen. We switched to soy. Other non-dairy & non-soy formula did not work, he was vomiting actual fountains. Soy is the ONLY thing he kept down and he wasn't allergic to.
I got shamed non stop for feeding my baby toxins and poison. I was told to breastfeed, but I couldn't breastfeed, I had a miniscule supply, like 2oz a day from BOTH breasts after 6 weeks of trying to up it and extra pumping myself into a mental breakdown.
I got told to make my own, sorry but I'm not a f*****g nutritionist, I'm not doing that.
I got told I need to get goats milk, well that is also dairy.
I kept getting told soy is "not normal". Okay Brenda, how much f*****g blood is normal for a baby to s**t??? Because dairy makes my baby s**t blood.
#20
I didn’t attempt to induce lactation so I could breastfeed my adopted baby.
Savannah greenleaf 8 months ago
Don't blame you a bit. If you got judged for that one I would tell them to keep their opinions to themselves, or just stick them where the sun does not shine and leave me alone.
#21
I used to work with this lovely woman, super kind and well-meaning. I was pregnant with my first and all I craved was watermelon so bad that cucumber smelled like it. I'd eat whole cukes, salting a little bit per bite. She observed me consume one with my salt shaker in the other hand.
Afterwards, she came up to me with her sweet kindly smile and whispered lovingly to me, "Obey the cravings, hon, but watch your salt intake." She then punctuated her statement with a stern-faced motherly nod.
Little did she know that I had been "prescribed" salt by my doctor due to ridiculously low BP (for example, first thing in the morning, before I have anything to eat or drink, it can be as low as 80s over 50s).
People who knee-jerk mom-shame people don't know enough to say c**p about anything. Let it roll off like water on a duck's back. They're the ones making an a*s of themselves, not out of you.
Shark Lady 8 months ago
I have to have double the recommended amount of salt as I don't absorb it properly. I have had so many comments about it, especially in restaurants. One waiter told me I was disrespecting the talent of the chef.
#22
Not having my son in socks, multiple times, because *isn't he going to get cold?*
It was the height of summer and 100°F outside.
The Big Bad 8 months ago
My kids always want to take off their coats, shoes and socks. Imo if they feel they're warm enough they should. They're the ones that are running and climbing. I can't feel what they feel.
#23
For not giving my 6 week old rice cereal & picking my daughter up while pregnant.
Glen Ellyn 8 months ago
Good grief! Women who think they know better, based on outdated advice. Sheesh. I'm happy to say that I never - and I mean never - said anything to my daughter or daughter-in-law about anything having to with with childcare. As old as I am, I realize things have changed. Doctors' recommendations - based on science - have also changed. Just think of all that has been learned about SIDS! (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.)
#24
I am from Latin America and get a lot of “why are your daughter’s ears not pierced?” when I visit home. Until she was 6 months it was followed “you can’t even tell she is a girl”. Her hair has always been long since birth, so from 6 months onwards the need for bows/hairdo’s to prevent her hair from falling on her eyes have at least stopped the second (extremely sexist) portion of the question. She still gets pity looks though like “poor thing, she doesn’t have holes in her ears”.
#25
Literally everything. From his outfit to his physical size. Like he's tall. He's 2.
The hardest one was about letting him feed himself, instead of feeding him myself after he hit 5mo. With doctor suggestion.
Savannah greenleaf 8 months ago
Just take high chair outside spray with garden hose and repeat the next day. If they are capable let them try. Supervise help if needed, but kids generally like a bit of independence. If child pours spaghetti in hair and it's nice outside I was also okay with taking the kids out and spraying them with the hose too. They loved it!
#26
My daughter loves to carry her shoes but not wear them. She walks but only at home and she’s still gaining confidence. I say this because she’s not walking around stores barefoot. I’ve had a dozen or so people tell me my poor baby needs shoes on to protect her feet or why is she holding them instead of wearing them. While she’s in the buggy no where near the floor. I usually say something to the effect of “alright YOU try to get them on her”. Usually people look offended and walk off.
Forrest Hobbs 8 months ago
So how do these loonies think human beings managed to get around before inventing shoes? Sheesh. 🙄
#27
Some lady was appalled that my 11 month old early walker had only socks and no shoes at the park and was roaming about shoeless.
"Where are her shoes?!"
I told her that my baby just started walking and that she can't walk in shoes yet (she legitimately would just faceplant with shoes on).
This lady gave me such a look and then took her toddler and left the park!
To this day I have no idea why this upset her so.
#28
When my son was little he cried a lot, I was breastfeeding so my MIL said "maybe he's crying so much cause your breast milk isn't good enough" she wanted me to formula feed...
#29
I was recently afforded the opportunity to go to a grocery store alone and during checkout a very young toddler (maybe 20mos?) was crying very loudly and was terribly upset a few registers over. The Complaint behind me were tisking loudly and talking about being unable to control a child. I said (to no one in particular) “poor baby, he must be getting teeth or just wants a hug from mom”.
Ffs, my 23mo wails at home if I don’t show her my belly button while I’m trying to have a p*o.
#30
My grandma gets so mad at me when i let my 4 year old pick out her own outfits, she goes “well why is she wearing that you could’ve put a nice outfit on her” like she’s 4 and if she wants to pick out her own clothes she’s going to be allowed to do that. or when i leave my daughters hair down instead of putting it up she’ll immediately take her to the bathroom and do it even if i tell her she didn’t want it done she wanted it down she doesn’t care she wants my daughter to look like a babydoll 24/7 and it’s just not going to happen and she constantly makes me feel like i can’t do it right.
#31
I literally got Mom shamed for making my first her own special birthday cake that was nicely decorated for her first birthday and a separate cake for everyone else. People are ruthless. You gotta water off a duck this kind of stuff.
#32
My now toddler has hip dysplasia and was in a full body harness for several months as a newborn/infant. The number of “concerned” people that approached me out of the blue asking if I had dropped her or if she had been shaken was astounding.
#33
My colleague shamed me for breastfeeding my (10-months at the time) baby everytime she woke up at night. She said i should hire a night nanny to "raise" my daughter if i'm not going to do it myself.
#34
Almost everything! for caring to much for my baby! I once was about to leave my parents house to go back home. then changed my mind because the baby was hungry and i said i'd feed her first my sister said "you are just being over the top" for wanting to feed my baby?
i forgot once to get extra clothes and was mom-shamed for it. i was pregant with my second and my first one threw up in her bed, my mom who came to help suggested she will pick her up kept shaming me for not knowing she vomitted!! staid the whole day making me feel like a bad mom. so many other stories. and sadly the mom-shaming always come from mothers. not once from my childless friends.
Zoe Vokes 8 months ago
As a childless person I have no idea what the development ages are, so I can’t judge a thing. No idea when they’re supposed to crawl, walk, feed themselves, etc. Other mothers have an idea when the “proper” time is for things and how to raise a child because the did it themselves, read it in a book, read about it online… And depending what their age is they have a lot of disproven knowledge that is now known to be wrong.
#35
The nurse practioner at my old obgyn mom shamed me for co-sleeping with my son because a 6 month old should be sleeping all night and I needed to let him cry.
That boy didn't sleep through the night till he was 2 years old. He was 1 year before we sleep-trained him. I had to co-sleep because he's a side/belly sleeper and I was solo all night because my husband was at work at night. No one would have slept at night if he wasn't on my chest. I'm a light sleeper, he was safe.
I lost all respect for that woman because I was a first time mom, trying to survive on 5 hours of broken sleep per night and sheer willpower.
#36
My baby was crying in the grocery store one day, and a lovely older woman said out loud to nobody “sounds like somebody needs to be taken home”. It wasn’t in a concerned or empathetic way. She was clearly bothered by the crying, which I was doing my best to not be overstimulated by after a bad day.
I said right to her face “yes, as soon as I buy the formula she’s crying for you f*****g a*****e, I am NOT HERE BECAUSE IM HAVING A GOOD TIME”…
She apologised, I ran off to pay and we both cried in the car on the way home 🤣
It was always boomers who seemed to forget how it is when you’re knee deep in literal baby poop.
Joe Reaves 8 months ago
There are plenty of places where a crying baby should be removed immediately - a grocery store is not one of them.
#37
My MIL was a single mom that raised two boys. When my husband and I signed our 2.5 year old (at the time) up for daycare after having had a nanny, my MIL asked if our daughter would be going to daycare a full day, 9am-5pm. And I said yeah that’s when we work. And she said, but that’s such a long day. Like ?! She was a single mom, I’m sure she had her kids in daycare for “such a long day” too?!
Crystalwitch60 8 months ago
I highly doubt it lol she,d have left em at home alone 😂or had free baby sitters aka neighbours, cos those where that kinda time , we don’t all have that support do we
#38
I went to the grocery store an hour ago. I forgot to get green beans for my baby's purees. I wanted to make her chicken and green beans, but I'm infamous for forgetting important things. I forgot to get formula too.
Right before going, my daughter had a 6 0z bottle, which is what she should be eating for her age, but I had a feeling she was still hungry. So I fed her an entire sweet corn puree I made yesterday. And then I gave her 2 Oz of water. So she had quite a bit.
I changed her diaper before leaving and went to smiths.
While checking out, this old lady judgementally asks me "when is the last time you changed her diaper, it's full!". I'm not confrontational, so I just casually replied that I'd changed it 30 mins prior. She just stared at me doubtfully and then commented that it's too hot outside to be having a small baby out.
I don't want to be too specific, but my daughter is close to one year of age. And also, how am i supposed to grocery shop without her? Just leave her at home alone? The rest of my household was at work.
I get that she should be changed as soon as possible, my baby has only ever had one diaper rash so I'm not lazy (not that you are if you have troubles with this; every baby is different), but it was literally a 30 min grocery run.
I don't know. Maybe I'm taking it too personally. It just annoys me that her dad never gets comments like that, meanwhile I've had a few (of varying topics) throughout the months.
Forrest Hobbs 8 months ago (edited)
If you're out with a small child, there's always going to be someone somewhere thinking you're doing it wrong. FWIW, I've had comments directed at me doing it wrong and I'm the dad. 🤷
#39
Still breastfeeding at 20 months by a close friend and some family. Not outward shaming but definitely judgmental comments and implying that I am too attached / doing something bad for her. Makes me cry even writing this. Ppl are the worst!
#40
At my daughter's first swimming lesson, I was mom shamed by another mom because my 2yo daughter threw a tantrum after I forced her to take a shower after leaving the pool (you can read all about it on my post). I felt awful. But now I know she was just an a*****e.
That lady was also an a*****e. You daughter used her diaper while you were shopping. So what?
#41
I got pregnant shamed one time. We were at a funeral and another mom that goes to our sitter was pregnant also. And mind you she is tiny and I’m average. Both of us were Uber pregnant and her husband asked if I was ready to have my baby and I was like yea I’m exhausted. He said yea you’re looking a little swollen. Needless to say his wife heard him and he got it the whole was home and the next morning from her!!
Edda Kamphues 8 months ago
Me too: I was in a shopping centre and an elderly guy pointed at my pregnant belly and said "You see those everywhere these days". How did he think we procreate? Pollination???
#42
We went on a carnival cruise and took our 4 year old to Camp Ocean every single night so my husband and I could go to the casino or the shows. We told my SIL about it and she goes: “I don’t think I could ever do that… how do you trust them?”.
#43
We had my best friend over for breakfast at our house one morning. She literally gasped and jokingly yelled my full name when she saw me add some sprinkles to my daughter's yogurt to get her to eat it. For context, she will never have kids.
What do you think ?
Little Bit 8 months ago
As a mother you can't win. Here in the UK if you are a stay at home mum you get called a "benefits scrounger" because you are not going out to work. On the other hand, if you choose to go back to work after having a baby, then apparently you are neglecting your child and you shouldn't be having kids if you can’t afford it.
Forrest Hobbs 8 months ago
Mmm. Dads get this sort of thing too, you know. The most memorable incident I experienced was being hassled by the actual police for supposedly not taking proper care of my child out in public. It was cold. Apparently, my child should have had a hat on. Yeah, great idea - only any time we put a hat on them, they took it off. Everything else was tickey-boo for cold weather and the child was obviously quite happy - so? 🤷
Load More Replies...
Marianne 8 months ago (edited)
"What do you think motivates people to shame mothers in public?" Great question, BP. But the correct answer isn't on the list. Many of these people are simply unsure if they do/did everything right with their own children. And when they see parents doing it differently, they see it as an attack on their methods. So they make sure to show that what others do is wrong, because then what they did themselves must be right.
A girl 8 months ago
Malice? I think some folks like being miserable and would like others to feel that way.
Load More Replies...
Robert Cosgrove 8 months ago (edited)
Some of these are just people being concerned. When stories come out about children being harmed or something happening to them, people always ask why someone didn't say something. A passerby making the sort of comment like above will sometimes save a child from being hurt
ILoveMySon 7 months ago
I hosted a dinner party when my son was approximately one y/o. He awoke from sleep during dessert. A guest from my office said I should "let him cry it out". Nope, not for me. Everyone has different ideas, and I don't believe in Ferberizing. This jerk didn't and still doesn't have children and was never invited to my home again. I am Mommy and know my child, thank you.
Babs McGurk 8 months ago
For most of these, my standard response would be, "I don't recall asking you for your opinion." Then I would turn and go about my business.
Julie S 8 months ago
Why do you hate America so much? Not a single post on here said it happened in America so why do you assume it is?
Load More Replies... Little Bit 8 months ago
As a mother you can't win. Here in the UK if you are a stay at home mum you get called a "benefits scrounger" because you are not going out to work. On the other hand, if you choose to go back to work after having a baby, then apparently you are neglecting your child and you shouldn't be having kids if you can’t afford it.
Forrest Hobbs 8 months ago
Mmm. Dads get this sort of thing too, you know. The most memorable incident I experienced was being hassled by the actual police for supposedly not taking proper care of my child out in public. It was cold. Apparently, my child should have had a hat on. Yeah, great idea - only any time we put a hat on them, they took it off. Everything else was tickey-boo for cold weather and the child was obviously quite happy - so? 🤷
Load More Replies... Marianne 8 months ago (edited)
"What do you think motivates people to shame mothers in public?" Great question, BP. But the correct answer isn't on the list. Many of these people are simply unsure if they do/did everything right with their own children. And when they see parents doing it differently, they see it as an attack on their methods. So they make sure to show that what others do is wrong, because then what they did themselves must be right.
A girl 8 months ago
Malice? I think some folks like being miserable and would like others to feel that way.
Load More Replies... Robert Cosgrove 8 months ago (edited)
Some of these are just people being concerned. When stories come out about children being harmed or something happening to them, people always ask why someone didn't say something. A passerby making the sort of comment like above will sometimes save a child from being hurt
ILoveMySon 7 months ago
I hosted a dinner party when my son was approximately one y/o. He awoke from sleep during dessert. A guest from my office said I should "let him cry it out". Nope, not for me. Everyone has different ideas, and I don't believe in Ferberizing. This jerk didn't and still doesn't have children and was never invited to my home again. I am Mommy and know my child, thank you.
Babs McGurk 8 months ago
For most of these, my standard response would be, "I don't recall asking you for your opinion." Then I would turn and go about my business.
Julie S 8 months ago
Why do you hate America so much? Not a single post on here said it happened in America so why do you assume it is?
Load More Replies... You May Like 58 Times Parents Turned Their Crazy Moments Into Funny Tweets This November 50 Honest Before-And-After Motherhood Photos From Moms Who Aren’t Sugarcoating It Someone Asks Parents If They Regret Having Kids And These 40 Say Yes And Share Why
Evelina Šiukšterytė
Simona Kinderytė
Shelly Fourer
Related on Bored Panda
