Moms Of Twitter Reveal Some Funny Things That Happen To Them While Raising Kids (50 Jokes)

Smart child

Me too, words to live by.

Work from home, I do this daily!

The force is strong in this one

😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣

This is the way she goes to the store.

She is a wise girl

My daughter used to sing 'Dig up the Dancing Queen' ... not sure if she thought she was a zombie or what :D

....poor waiter

Is Fat guy in a little coat a song? :)

Those nails are done so neatly, a future in manicures...

Better than finding out your brother is her father, I guess.

30 minutes later * HULK SMASH* ;)

🤣

I hate casserole and pie so jokes on this mom. Don't downvote I'm allergic to most crusts.

Nice try though !!

I know a much easier way. 0 for one kid and 0 for the other. and me 1 whole M&M.

WHAT??!!!!?!!??!?!!!? .... Hi! *runs away*

And the dogs are trying to figure out why the kids are now the ones waiting to be taken on a walk.

Welcome to my world except my son put my phone into Thai.

me and my sister so our parents don’t see lol

😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

II’S SO TRUE!!

Me too. Totally worth the mess i the car!

My thoughts and prayers go out for your family 😞 /s

And every rule is subject to change at any moment, without any notice given until after you've broken it.

What's the market rate for teeth these days

one makes it physically impossible, the other makes it psychologically so

Mind blown🤯... Then again my parents always made us nap after school or we suffered immediate homework 😱

lol

I hope it was recorded

My son's number 4 is constantly quoting lines from the Mr Men Show.

This is my mother ... every time lol

No, but I stayed inside 40 through 56

My brothers got harmonicas a couple years ago and I still want to be Mr. Potato head so I can take my ears off.

Yes what were you thinking, lol

My mom should've considered this when she took me to Yosemite, on a hike, 5 miles each way, 6 hours of the day spent climbing- and I was just 11

Whenever we go to Brent Cross (North London shopping centre) my son always wants to go to the third floor of Fenwicks. He won't say why just that we need to go there. We know why, it's because he gets to go in a lift (an obsession of his) and that's where the toys are

i will now do that

It would've been even cooler if he did the pointing Spiderman meme with his toys

Me: "Who farted!?" _________ siblings5: *SUPER SNIFF 1000!* _____ Sibling4:the one who smelt it delt it! ______ Sibling3:The one who said the ryme did the crime!

Just look for the damn dog 🙃

And smelling fermented sweat that he's been sitting in their armpits

Plot twist: that's actually the mom's username.

That’s some bad habits.

My dad told my sister she was sent down from Heaven, my brother that he was picked out of a vending machine, and then he told me that he sent away for a kit.

That's me, the child being yelled at

Ugh! Yes! [Not a mom but I have 4 siblings!]

1. Just 1... 1075!

You will miss those little fingerprints when they grow up .. trust me x

Well played, well played

Uhm... 47?

They just stand there, 6 inches (15cm) from your face, and silently stare at you which, for some weird reason known only to toddlers and ghosts, wakes you within seconds. Little weirdos

Went with my sister and her kids to the zoo when they were small. Somehow, we missed the meerkats. It was raining and we were tired and it was half an hour back - but I carried the 5 year old back as quick as I could. His eyes opened in wonder as he shouted "look, look - a snail" a crowd of little ones surrounded him to share in the glory of the snail while me and the other adults avoided eye contact.

The kid gets it though

Probably licked it first

M-A-S-S-A-C-H-U-S-E-T-T-S