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Millennials and Gen Z might prefer text messages, as they save one from the stress of actually calling someone, but this overlooks the very real possibility that one receives a message that ends up making one feel worse than any call could have. 

The “Texts With Threatening Auras” Twitter page gathers user-submitted messages that they have received which caused some amount of confusion, laughter, or consternation. So prepare to read a selection of letters put together in a particularly cursed manner, upvote your favorite ones, and be sure to comment your thoughts below. 

More info: Twitter

#1

Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

Texts With Threatening Auras Report

Mell
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hahahaha, this one is gold!!

MaximumKarmaSaint
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"BBQ parties were never the same. Nothing had changed except the name, but different-and I mean VERY different people started coming to his house."

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Caroline Kimber
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

HAHA! Well NOW it stands for Burgers, Drinks & Salsa Music!!

Alexia
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Brilliant! I want to know what happened next :)))

Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Barbeque, Soda, Doritos, and Melons. I'd be there like a shot, and I probably wouldn't leave.

Marno C.
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But, but, did Bob and Agnes accept the invitation?

Me.
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What does it stand for? (I will probably regret knowing, but not as much as not knowing)

Em
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadomasochism. Basically an umbrella term for kinky s**t.

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Surfing Panda
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I want to know the whole story... what happened? Did they arrive dressed in leather suits? How did the party go?

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    #2

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Mashmelo
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    HAHAHAHAHA edit: holy cwap thx for all the likes it’s only been 15 h

    glowworm2
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    is the water going to be poured over the fence in a giant cauldron?

    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I once babysat a girl who would always say "oh brother" when she was annoyed. I taught her to say "oh sister" instead.

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    Unpickled Pickle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Boiling water balloons... Sounds fun...

    White Sauce Hot Sauce
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The stash of icicles I've been keep in in the freezer since winter will finally come in handy.

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    #3

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They had to expect that. Brilliant!

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Very good! I love sarcasm!

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    While there are a myriad of possible ways to send someone a text message, the SMS, the original text messenger, is still around and kicking. In 2010, there were over 6.1 trillion text messages sent, which translates to 193,000 SMS per second (SMSPS, if you will.) Despite the popularity of WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, Discord, and an ocean of other alternatives, a decade later, there are still around 270,000 texts being sent every second.

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    In terms of sheer numbers, the most common message is “I love you,” followed by “I will be home later,” which possibly is an answer to the third most common message, “Where are you?” It’s pretty easy to see how sending just one of these to the wrong person can create a chain of chaos commonly found in a middling sitcom. 

    #4

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, it actually assures you'll be unable to drink alone for the rest of your life with a disabled child. Your choice.

    FLAMING KOALA
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I picked don't drink for two reasons 1 drinking bad 2 I had an autistic kid in my 5th grade and he would lay in the middle of the gym at half court until it was over, someone had to drag him off

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    MaximumKarmaSaint
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To the first guy: I really hope so, the baby should not be drinking. To the second person: Oof size: Large.

    Deery Lou
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i guess if you have to eat for 2 you need to drink for 2

    Valek Fermiga
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ouch, giving birth probably hurts less than that....

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    #5

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    MaximumKarmaSaint
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If I had a penny for every time the context text failed to send and the bad ones did, I wouldn't be that rich but I'd have a few more coins in my wallet.

    FLAMING KOALA
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would be broke but there are so many memes no one has even seen but me

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    Shannon Hawks
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    if only the 1st and last message went thru, you should probably never go home again

    Maria B
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Phones are evil. They do this on purpose.

    Yasmine Ramirez
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i would be balling my eyes out if i received those messages

    Maria B
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    bawling , you mean? I assume that was auto-correct corrupting your comment :D

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    Scorpion(Hanzo Hasashi)
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Auto correct will be the death of me…First death, Quan Chi. Second, Auto Correct error

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one always cracks me up.

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    #6

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Red Wyvern Emperor
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like a big load of Not my problem. XD

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why people answer work texts is a mystery, as long as it's not a job requirement. You get in much less trouble for 'My phone died' than answering and saying no to whatever they want from you.

    Scorpion(Hanzo Hasashi)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “I missed the part where that’s my problem..” -Bully Maguire

    Scorpion(Hanzo Hasashi)
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    *continues watching movie*

    MaximumKarmaSaint
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I've done something like this before.

    ano nym
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    those are some healthy boundaries 🤣

    Michael Ruggiero
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Short staffed? So no top shelf liquor?

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    Alongside good old SMS, you have the various instant messaging (IM) apps out on the market. In 2022, the largest was WhatsApp, at around two billion users, followed by Facebook Messenger, at 1.3. In China, WeChat has a respectable 1.2 billion users, while the runner-up, Telegram, sits at 700 million. Between all of these and the host of other options, there are millions of ways a person can accidentally (or purposefully) send something pretty cursed. 

    #7

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah yes bird seed...bc i need to buy black market birdseed available at a 24 hr Walmart

    Actively Lazy Cat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love how they say ur not invited, like he's a f*cking vampire and that's all it takes to keep him out 🤣🤣🤣

    Gardener of Weeden
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even funnier (to me) I make my own birdseed from my sunflowers. And I don't let my other plants go to seed... LOL

    Angelshark
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Birdseed. And a can of soup. It's for my family.

    Surfing Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Come on ... al that fuzz about a bit of oregano...

    Nadia D
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seed for the lil birdie with lovely eyes 🙂

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    #8

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    The wee giant
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Until I read your comment I thought that he was standing behind a grille and getting ready to whack some one with a stick

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    Mell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now we all want to know!

    MaximumKarmaSaint
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Probably a little kid failing to trash-talk in the most offensive way possible.

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    Bamboozled
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I feel sorry for the photographer

    Scorpion(Hanzo Hasashi)
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Dude trying go to full Kung Lao with that bayblade

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    #9

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Lost Penny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why am I laughing at this so hard??

    Barong
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Same. This was good. It had three elements of a good joke whether it was intended as one or not. (Hopefully it was.). It was clever, unexpected, and a little bit twisted.

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    Blue Bunny of Happiness
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pretty much what my ex looked like when he discovered a hole in his beekeeping gear, but sadly only on one side of his face. I love bees. Very intelligent creatures…

    Mike Fitzpatrick
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anyone else get a mental image of a guy running thru the woods flailing his arms around like he's trying to fly?

    Malfar
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seen too many versions of this one.

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    Part of the unease that texts can create stems from the fact that they naturally obfuscate the writer's emotions, tone, and intent. Seeing “we need to talk” might send shivers down your spine, although the good news is that most people have used text messages long enough to know that this sort of ambiguity is unwise. However, it is a great way to make someone uncomfortable. 

    #10

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Em
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me of a few years ago when I applied at a local fast food franchise. The owner said I was hired, then dicked me around for weeks. Ran into the owner's mom several months later, well into my current (fantastic) gig. "Oh hey, you applied here, didn't you? Still wanna work here?" "Nah, not really." "Why not?" "Well, no one who works here seems to like it very much." She's been chilly toward me ever since. 😂

    Geoffrey Scott
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    After working 3-4 7 days a week straight I called in tired...person answering said "you can't do that" I told them to write it anyway. My boss laughed when I came in the next day

    LandAhoy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You worked for one hour a day, 3-4, every day a week and you were tired?

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    Queen Shay
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is my boss in a nutshell I’ll message her and just say I’m having a bit of a day mind if I take off? It’s always sure go ahead let me know if you need anything! She’s the best, our company has no attendance point system or anything, you’re good as long as you have pto time

    ILoveMySon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Downvote Bandits struck again. Here's an upvote. 🙂

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    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wish this was a legitimate excuse, boss I'm sick of work today. Promise I'll be back but not today.

    ILoveMySon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Here's an upvote to counter the downvote Bandit.

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    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honesty is always best!

    KittyGaming
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😆😆😆😆😆

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is this a different pic than the one on the front page? bp-temp-64...acc36c.jpg bp-temp-64ee479acc36c.jpg

    Binky Melnik
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What difference does it make? No one’s on tenterhooks waiting for an answer, as it makes no difference. It’s not interesting. Happens every day, sometimes more than once. Unless BP responds with some hilarious answer, it’s entirely a nothing burger.

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    Larry XK
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did this at my last place except I didn't text them.

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    #11

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Corlissa
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hol up, I have seen this post before but from the other pov. This is the random person that texted Xavier! Ya know the famous guy on facebook

    Shannon Hawks
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Xavier, is psychotically hilarious

    Omima mimi miki
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    HAHAHA i would hate it if my partner took my phone and did that

    #12

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Will Cable
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think asking is very polite, beats our old neighbour who used to drill at night gone 22:30

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You should meet mine. They think nothing of loud banging at any time of day or night. I don't even know when they sleep.

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    Sum Guy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's a good "neighbor"/roommate

    Alecto76
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've seen this one. The neighbor with the baby is from Poland and is not a native English speaker.

    Natty Tempest
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know who the asker is, but we need to teach this level of empathy in schools!

    GrillMeASalmon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why use just one word when you can use seven?

    Sergio Bicerra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why did I read those answers like a Jedi Master?

    Angelshark
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, that's a weird response.

    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like AI was responding. Drilling granted.

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    Intentionally misspelled words or weird punctuation can be another way to create confusion and unease, all while maintaining plausible deniability. Less confident people sometimes attempt the “pretending to send a text to the wrong person” as a way to start a conversation, although this is no longer really possible as in most cases, one will be texting a social media profile with a name, not just a phone number.

    #13

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Sergy Yeltsen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Liking your bread buttered on both sides doubles your chances of pulling on a Saturday night...

    Kim
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have to agree, he is handsome.

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Uh oh!

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    #14

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Sooploosh MacSchnibble
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    one of my all-time favorites. When I lie in bed at night I think about what he wanted to talk about

    T5n
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If I recall correctly, he was inviting his grandchild to bingo

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    imontape
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My favourite is the grandma asking if bukkake is a restaurant lol

    Mochi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I saw it's because he wouldn't get his grandpa kfc?

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know what this person did but they are in deep deep trouble.

    FLAMING KOALA
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pov ur grandpa can hit you through the phone

    #15

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Mycroft1967
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Two peanuts were walking down the road and one of them was a-salted

    Anne Jones
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There was a fight in the chip shop last night. A fish got battered.

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    Reemerger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mr. Snail did not sleep well that night, cuddling Mrs. Snail and little Timmy and Suzy closer than ever before...

    MaximumKarmaSaint
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was quite a struggle to start doing so, but when he was fine with stopping, they seemed to be a bit stuck, possibly sealing their fate.

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    Captain McSmoot
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This just triggered someone. (I'll see myself out.)

    Verena
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The quality of a gun joke depends highly on which continent(s) sender and recipient live

    Lez Be Honest
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I laughed unnecessarily hard at this

    Shannon Hawks
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    unless you're eating it, i think your safe

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    On the other hand, it can be pretty confusing to receive an unintended text message. In most cases, it’s pretty straightforward, as the majority of the population isn’t texting esoteric instructions or compromising information freely, but every once in a while, a spectacular mix-up happens, that results in the hilarity you can see here. 

    #16

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    iBlank
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm tired of all these old systems, you got a PS28?

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    OmMi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha I used to work for Walmart.com. We indeed have no freaking access of any inventory related data so yeah, we don't know.

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gustavo is done with everything.

    Astrius
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you for contacting Los Pollos Hermanos! My name is Gustavo but you can call me Gus.

    Colleen Glim
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Left my fortune telling hat at home. Sorry

    TomCat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Finally, a job I would excel at!

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Excellent answer!

    ILoveMySon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Off topic, but I keep seeing downvotes for legitimate comments. Have no fear normal pandas, I am upvoting to counteract. 🙂

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    #17

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Mell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can't be bothered when you're that age. You've deserved the right to not care.

    XenoMurph
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At what age??? Some of my friends are grandparents, same age as me. I'd be a soggy puddle of weeping happiness. If you don't care about your grandkids, you really should reassess your life.

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    Em
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Literally me when people show off their kids though.

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's not that hard to say something nice but succinct.

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    Robert Millar
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's not Grandpa, it's a baby, duh.

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like my dad via text. It's a miracle when he can be bothered to look for an emoji or use more than one word.

    Andy Frobig
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Withholding judgment on whether the baby is a coward

    Wondering Alice
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My dad was not from a generation where men were present at child birth, but mid 70's UK strikes ment leaving my mum alone to give birth to me was not ok. So he stepped up and delivered me then made the calls to family. My grandmother asked what I looked like, he said frozen chicken.

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    #18

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Bored Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hell yeah block it

    PIXLBLITZ||they.hae.lune
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "You *will*. Draw her breasts ***extra full***."

    Yeet_girl360
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The worst part is the fact that the characters are literal teenagers.. 🤦‍♀️

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    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nothing like an Incel angrily subduing a comic and insisting on full breasts. Makes me want to draw a really fat Garfield with man-boobs and flirty eyes.

    Maria B
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Somebody is begging to be bitchslapped.

    KittyGaming
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Are you Minetta because if you are not disgusting, for all the normies Minetta is also a character from Bnha and he is a perv so unless it is him texting, why

    GrillMeASalmon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    First time seeing a ransom note about artwork...

    Celtic Pirate Queen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I get an average of 3 guys asking me for friend requests per week. I usually respond with "Um, NO. I don't send friend requests to random internet strangers, but I'm sure my husband would LOVE to chat with you". And then I block them. Last week I got a DEMAND that I send this rando creep a friend request. I told him I don't take orders from my husband & I sure as F*CK will not be taking any from you. Block.

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    In other cases, we can see a clear clash of generations, as older folks often don’t quite follow the tonal indicators that younger people look out for. This creates multiple layers of hilarity, as meanings and intent fly over both parties' heads, creating an inane set of messages. Add in images, links, and emojis, and you have a potent party on your hands, as most people in large family group chats can attest to. 

    #19

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't be a coward. Press Send.

    MyNameIsNotAPortent
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    FBI Agent is lousy wiretapper but excellent wingman

    Scorpion(Hanzo Hasashi)
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don’t be a p*ssy. Do it. Just do it. Btw I’m your FBI agent.

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is the sender using a Slim Jim to write?

    SadieCat17
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know that this is fake but I'm very conflicted. I've had guys scream at me for leading them on just for being nice back to them. She was very rude while doing it, but I bet she does not have the energy to deal with more s**t on her plate.

    The Kitten Overlord
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They had a phone to take a picture of a phone. 🙄

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    #20

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Annik Perrot
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What about "don't publish your kid's pic on f*cking Facebook" ?

    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sell your baby?! This is why you don't post photos of your children on Facebook

    Sum Guy
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Report her now, she should be on a list

    BluKatTheBlueCat (BluKat)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    THE F*CK?? Block her, screenshot this, and call the police-

    Florence O'Grady
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    CALL THE POLICE, NOW!!! This woman needs serious psychological help. If she doesn't get it, someone could end up dead. It has happened before.

    NY Redneck
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Had an Aunt who tried to do this. I'm the oldest of 4. 3 younger sisters(1 & twins) who for a month are the same age. When the twins were born my aunt decided by herself that my mother wouldn't have the "time or love" for that many kids and showed up at the house with a check and a car seat. She had already bought and set up everything you'd need for a baby and just assumed my mother was just going to hand one over because she said so. Apparently "No, go f*ck yourself you crazy b*tch" wasn't the response she expected and flipped out, trying to just take one of my sisters. After my mother finished beating her @ss she actually had the nerve to call the police and thought they were going to take her side and just hand her a baby. She spent the next 6 months calling in false child abuse reports and stalking our family in an attempt to kidnap one of them as a way of showing what a bad mother my mom was. She ended up getting beat up twice more before giving up.

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    #21

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Vintage B----
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i luv the fact that it says f--king but they cut out f-ck

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    The politics of a larger group chat are likely to be studied by future anthropologists. Different combinations of people end up creating unique ecosystems within the app of choice. For example, the larger friend group chat, with smaller ones excluding a handful of members. Or an all-inclusive family group chat where a select few don’t know that they aren’t included in the “real” family group. 

    #22

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Trish
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought it was fake, until I saw the hee hee. Does he still need $600?

    Scorpion(Hanzo Hasashi)
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would, but I gave my last $600 bringing Elvis back to the United States.

    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I watched a documentary where an independent film company found Elvis. They used the freedom of information act to get his FBI files. Apparently he was in witness protection, and had worked with the FBI against the Mafia and celebrities in the drug business. He never took any drugs himself. He purposely gained weight and all, to make people think he was. Then he faked his own death and went into hiding. It was rather entertaining.

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    Caroline Kimber
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha! There'll be somebody out there that will fall for this....

    _mentally_insane_(she/her)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What are you talk about? He said ‘Hee Hee!’! Only Michael Jackson would say that, there’s no way it’s not him! /s

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    #23

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Me
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What in the actual fuckety f**k

    Tamra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never. It's been condemned and is set for reconstruction. I'll let you know about the grand re-opening. Bring popcorn.

    zak
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you get one of those searchlights that shines into the sky and moves around, you can really get the word out.

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    SquiddoDiddo
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lol how did bp not censor this it’s holy

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    they are changing sponsors, to someone that say they could use any words?

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    Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was wondering if anyone would say something like that. Also, I love your username.

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    Nonna_SoF
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's invitation only, and you don't have an invite.

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope it's actually BF-GF not just a random dude messaging someone.

    Larry XK
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is it not allowed to have sex at 0928?

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    #24

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Under the rest" of what? My pillow? Nah. It's comfy here, I'll pass

    Northlander72
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, at least it's better than A rest, as if they couldn't be bothered to come up with a better rest than what they could scrape off from the bottom of their shoes. Never settle for anything other than THE rest.

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    OhnoI’vebeencensored
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry, I already sent all my money to Michael Jackson. Hee hee.

    KittyGaming
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who's Michael Jackson, I sent mine to Muzan Kibutsuji (joke, joke i know who MJ is)

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    Erik Ivan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gotta be that Boris Johnson dude.

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, I had a genuine text from the Co-optiv Bank this morning....

    Andy Williams
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    must be tough being a scammer who is thick as mince

    Chris
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    On another note, that person has a neat wallpaper.

    Donglens
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As a Brit I wouldn't be surprised if this was legit with how truly incompetent our government is

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh ok, I always trust the government.......... NOT!

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    Another side effect of these self-contained bubbles of communication is the inside jokes, memes, and phrases that emerge. While not strictly an idiolect, as individual adherence might vary, it can be jarring as an outsider to see just how a long-established group communicates internally. 

    #25

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This stuttering business via text is creepy AF

    Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Right?! I've known some individuals with a stutter. They don't text like this. The ones I've known, I mean. Also, OP should send this to the police.

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    Scorpion(Hanzo Hasashi)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I like rp as much as the next person. But this person..I want to Will Smith slap them

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well that escalated quickly.

    Moezzzz
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg!! Is that a Jack Russell in your pic??!?

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    Snazzy Smurf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who are these guys? Did they all attend the same classes on how to scare women far, far away?

    Red PANda (she/they)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OwO’s are fine to me, but the stuttering just sounds like he’s having a stroke and the unprompted roleplay combined with the bad spelling is cringe in a bad way and is sending creepy and ick vibes

    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The baby talk alone would have gotten this joker blocked. Ick.

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    #26

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    I'M A SHOUTY MAN (they/he/she)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just because I lost the queen doesn't mean I give up on the king.

    James016
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You cut off the end line you dolts. Plus you have posted the full convo on here before. Thankfully I'M A SHOUTY MAN has saved this

    Caroline Kimber
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    On the year that I broke up with my ex, my Dad sent him a Christmas card....because 'why not'....

    Gabby Ghoul
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is the word chess slightly out-of-line like that? What did it really say?

    Xenon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's just an extra space.

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    Colonel Cornelius Cornwall
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thats nice. He didn't let a break up come between him and a friend.

    Heather Talma
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can play chess on messenger??

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    #27

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Red Wyvern Emperor
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My former colleague had a special card for these people. A credit card and on it... 3 cents. The ammount of satisfaction we all felt when some of these girls or scammers went from loving and caring to instant rage was prolonging our lives by years. XD

    two-sided llama
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hey i love your hair, what is your social security number

    Nonna_SoF
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was going to convert "go f**k yourself" into numbers, but I'm too lazy.

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    4638 2596 8773 5300, think this can be it. I have a fever, so can't say for sure...

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    Surfing Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My credit card is not allowed to have a phone...

    Snazzy Smurf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That reminds me of that "game" where people were supposed to post their social as that would be how much money you would have and whoever had the most won. Many people fell for that before they caught on.

    Tara L.
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    8675 3098 6753 0986 😉🤣

    REGAN STEWART
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    6666666666-there you go....to hell (no i dont care about the censors they are asleep

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    On the other end of the communication spectrum, text messages are also a good, live test of just how well (or poorly) a person interacts with technology. From typos to thinking a messenger is the same as a Google search, the internet is full of the misfortunes of the less-technically-savvy, now saved, recorded, and immortalized for all to see. 

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    #28

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Lost Penny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So what is it that you're bringing to the potluck? Chili was it...?

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Grandma's first encounter with the phone?

    Caroline Kimber
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just remind me again what you're bringing?

    Reemerger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I reckon they'll bring a whole lot of chili... or they might require medical attention.

    Gianna B D
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Look, clearly this guy thinks very highly of this chili. Not-Andrew should go to the potluck and try some.

    Unpickled Pickle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING PICKLES I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILII'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI I'M BRINGING CHILI

    Chewie Baron
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I still don’t know what he’s bringing. He could have mentioned it.

    two-sided llama
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hope each text means more chili because i'm in the mood for some

    KittyGaming
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Emkay reviewed this is his r/Ihadastroke compilation

    Nightfall Games
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is something my sister would do

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    #29

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Caroline Kimber
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Better than the photos random men used to try and share with me via Bluetooth!!

    Simona M.
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would accept in a second! 😂😂😂

    Reemerger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Holy Gargoyles!... I'm tempted.

    Bell-icose
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe I'm Craaaaaazy!

    Binky Melnik
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is NOT the kinda sample you wanna send if you wanna entice people to receive your photos! I was scrolled down, that popped into view, and I yelped (and then I laughed for being surprised). Send something NICE! He looks psycho-scary!

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    #30

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Spongebob
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And that should be the last conversation you ever had.

    𝐆𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐦-𝐏𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐚
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think everyone is missing that she's talking to another girl. Michaela is a female name, and not the same as Michael. So she's saying she needs a boyfriend that's like her girl friend.

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who in gods name is Tame Impala?

    Victoria
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One man band from Perth Australia, who plays all instruments for the record, but hires musicians for touring. Kinda similar to Boston from the 70s.

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    Astrius
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate this one. If someone has all that you want but you don’t want them, your dream person don’t exist. Settle or change your expectations if that’s not what you want.

    H Nunya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If they’re friends with a relationship usually like this, I don’t see what everyone’s upset about. If that’s not the case though, person was a little mean.

    Valek Fermiga
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    " a you who isnt you " ?? Who the f*** do you expect him to be?? Is he wearing a face mask?? Stop playing games with him!!

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    For some reason, certain people seem to continue to make the exact same mistakes, sending the same texts, “searching” the same terms on their Facebook feeds for all to see, or just texting aggressively, in the, generally, misguided hope that their strategy works out. The silver lining for the rest of us is a good chuckle and perhaps the enjoyment of these bewildering text messages. And if this list leaves you wanting more, Bored Panda has got you covered, check out our other article on this topic here

    #31

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    JoNo
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Better than what King Charles said to Queen Camilla back when they were having an affair. He wanted to be her tampon (so he could hang out you know where).

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    #32

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    More!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Presumably the ‘fatass’ is her child. Rotten parenting then.

    SpongeBob SquarePants
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If this is true then not funny. My dad did this c**p to me.

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    #33

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Jayne
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fat frog having "spaghetti": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HYaEDD48dk

    Bienlunée
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://youtu.be/1HYaEDD48dk?feature=shared Found it

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    #34

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Onion Cutting Ninja
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WHY IS THIS FROM THE PERSPECTIVE OF THE PERSON WHO SENT THAT

    Sven Grammersdorf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone actually sent that to their dad?

    ConstantlyJon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean, they got a response right? So two more of those and they're a squishy...

    Java Addict
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ugh DDLG. There's this couple that comes into the store sometimes, girl looks to be about 50 while her 'daddy' is significantly younger. She's always dressed like a little girl, knee socks and pigtails included. She prances around and giggles like a little kid and always rides on the front of the cart when they leave. Pure cringe.

    Dekker451
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why do you care? Who are they hurting by doing what makes them happy?

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    #35

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Mint the tiger 🩷 she her
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm sorry am I tired or is this the funniest thing I've seen in my entire life

    MushroomHead22
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    a burger place is out of cheese? for burgers? where every burger after the "classic" will come with cheese.

    Unpickled Pickle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Duba Duba Burger in cheesed with the opposite of with pickles

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    #36

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Mashmelo
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Toddler got into the message app

    Chewie Baron
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Always remember Maryland.

    Serenity Now!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm good; just gotta remember Maryland.

    Landithy
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, the giant crab-monsters that live in the bay finally got us because we didn't adorn our houses and vehicles with enough crab-shaped door-knockers, stickers, wall-hangings etc.

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    #37

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Mell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Several people - had me.

    Barong
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mine was really hot once. She was cremated.

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm a Mom and sweat all the time!

    Vier Nelle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Inside lip tattoo: Inflate to 20 pounds

    REGAN STEWART
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My crush has a hot mom. if my crush dont want me ill take his mom XD

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    #38

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Sooploosh MacSchnibble
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ive wanted to become one of these troll accounts who DM people. I was thinking of being a wizard who calls people out on adventures

    Dasha
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    5 foot 4 is that short?

    GrillMeASalmon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    D'you have a benchmark or some such?

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    #39

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Ansi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Dessert after pop-tarts?

    BitchinintheBurgh'
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    K-pop and Jelly-roll breakfast foods....

    Nonna_SoF
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well. You see, it all started after the Korean War...

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    #40

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Uh oh - that message is never good omen

    The mad duck
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Clears search history at lightspeed 🔥💨

    Unpickled Pickle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mom: *Starts scrolling through photos* You: *Sweating bullets*

    Aroace tiger (she/they/he)
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This scares me edit: I DIDN'T EXPECT THAT TO SEND OMG

    Mysteria
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just learn how to clear certain website data from your phone. Doesn’t affect the others (like YouTube or other things you’re allowed to be on) and it doesn’t delete your accounts on anything.

    Boreddd(she/her)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seeing as my search history is mainly things like "do purple potatoes exist" or "what is the past of to think" I think I'm one of the few people here that's safe💀

    Jeffrey Kusch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Factory reset in three two one...

    HelmGrass
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    not the sharpest tool in the shed?

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    #41

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mom committing some felonies

    nm
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The most serious felony is switching off the internet.

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    Jennifer_Crowley_Luci
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now this one made me laugh! :D Mom is DONE!

    celeste hall
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    is she going to set the room on fire or the internet on fire? might be a bit different outcome each way

    REGAN STEWART
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    this is going to be me as a mom, except id never turn off the internet

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    #42

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Menacing Duck
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WHAT DOES IT MEEAAANN???

    MaximumKarmaSaint
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh come on? How could you not know? It's so obvious... /s.

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    David Martin
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate to say, I heard this line used on someone back in high school, and the "better" wording is "because you're putting up an erection". For the record, no, that guy did not in fact get that girl either

    JB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "She's got dumps like a truck, truck, truck..."

    Astrophile
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I first heard that song I couldn’t stop thinking about how dumps can mean poops too lol

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    ConstantlyJon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think its a hustle culture thing? Like, we out here buildin' sort of thing. idk

    MushroomHead22
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    my business is me, and you are referring to my business, so tell me what it means.

    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Building a list of people who are BLOCKED,

    Snazzy Smurf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe they are calling them nosey because they are always in everyone else's business.

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    #43

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Scorpion(Hanzo Hasashi)
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited)

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I’m not. I can last. I’ll wait for someone to understand the joke.

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    Omima mimi miki
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Me: we all want to see you we"re by the grill

    #44

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Aroace tiger (she/they/he)
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How do u get over someone without not talking to them tho??

    Aboredpanda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seems like it's time to move on, then.

    ConstantlyJon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    maybe you need to accept the f*****g clash invite????

    Drippy Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    bro just cuz you can't get over them doesn't mean they can't get over you.

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    #45

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, you took me to Applebees.

    YTK
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry I don’t bring the good vibes to Applebees, what if someone stole them

    drew p
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🎶with a little bit of chicken fried🎶

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Perhaps you will do better at Olives Gardenia

    KittyGaming
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is this the girl from Fancy Like

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    #46

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Solangelo4life!!!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially for someone dealing with the loss of a brother

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    DonnerDinnerParty
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Okay, but the person really seemed like they were giving condolences. Why does the other one have to go right to assuming they're getting hit on? I fŭcking hate that so much. Like, not everyone who speaks to you is trying to get with you. Get the fŭck over yourself

    Maria B
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What a horrible person.

    Drippy Potato
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    might needa go to the hospital to patch up that burn

    Christian Dyson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Look what she said was messy but that was uncalled for just messed up

    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And when she declines show her exactly the bullet she just dodged. 🙄

    Kokichi Ouma
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I spit out my water, this is hilarious 💀 But I'm just saying that because I'm pulling an all nighter, that's actually really horrible. Still not okay to say.

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    #47

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    SpongeBob SquarePants
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't think I could call someone ugly unless I really hated them

    H Nunya
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need the context first. It’s weird to ask someone for their photo, and it is severely flawed thinking to judge based on appearances. Sender might’ve been doing the same thing though since the chat is through instagram. But she shouldn’t have acted interested (I’m hoping it was her that loved the my/girl message and not the one who sent it) just to turn sender away because of looks.

    tana
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I identify as chocolate. my pronounces are her/she

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    #48

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Lost Penny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's a...a small bus, mum. A bussy is just a small bus. *sweats a little*

    Passerby
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imagine mum using the word like that randomly one day, "I saw a really cute bussy when I was out just the other day. It was so small and pink!"

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    Passerby
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For the uninitiated, it comes from boy + püssy, so draw whatever conclusion you want to.

    Sundown u better take care
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thanks. I did not know this. I know other things but I didn't know this one.

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    Verena
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Service information: A "bussi" in German speaking countries is an innocent word for an innocent kiss on the cheek.

    Binky Melnik
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It’s the same in English. I can see where someone asking to be bussed is in for a big surprise!

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    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    De bussy? Isn't that an old music composer?

    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's an actor named Gary... was in Lethal Weapon with Mel Gibson and Danny Glover.

    Fickle_Pickle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ngl I had to google it lol

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    #49

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    The Chocolate Gecko
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A funny reply that compounds and builds on the original comment

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    #50

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Nonna_SoF
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anyone got some unsee juice?

    zak
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nonono, this is the kind of image that you save to then send as a response to any spam texts you receive. I have a bunch of weird photos like that saved on phone specifically for that reason lol

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    YTK
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sir, that is a hate crime

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    THe chosen one to wield the flamethrower against that abomination? I don't know about chosen but i'll take the job.

    Brenda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eye Bleach! I Need Eye Bleach!

    Landithy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ነረረ'ⶴል ቹ፪፱ክጮል ኡክ'ል?

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    #51

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    Cyndielouwhoo
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Only when they watch Rick and Morty.

    Kyle D
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It would seem answering "No" to the first question automatically gives you the answer to the second.

    DC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ... how is THAT a requirement for anything? And ... I watched three episodes. That's more than I want to ever watch of it again.

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I quite enjoy Rick and Morty, but damn that's a pretty lousy criteria to consider as "Strike one". Bet this guy wonders why no girls ever want to go out with him.

    Red Wyvern Emperor
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If anybody asked me that last question they would hit Strike 1, 2 and 3 at the same time. XD

    #52

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    F1 fan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    how could u say that mom

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm a Mom, I love that word!!!

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    #53

    Messages-With-Threatening-Auras

    Texts With Threatening Auras Report

    I'M A SHOUTY MAN (they/he/she)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bro no need for that it's already open 32 times too wide for it (on the second text)

    SeaJaySea
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your d**k isn't that big, this one will work :0

    White Sauce Hot Sauce
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's taking her on a date to one of those fancy burger places that make excessively tall burgers and wants to ensure that she's able to unhinge her jaw and swallow it whole.