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Whether we like it or not, conflicts are inevitable in any long-term relationship. Nearly everyone knows that finding someone you can be completely honest with comes with many ups and downs that reveal the most annoying behaviors imaginable. But while some disagreements can get seriously spicy, partners also often lose control and get angry over absolutely nothing.

Attorney, advocate, and author Rabia Chaudry set out on a mission to discover the stupidest and most meaningless arguments married couples "just cannot, will not stop having". Her Twitter thread quickly blew up with people opening up about the most infuriating habits their spouses have that make them fight about it for years.

From never squishing out the sponge to refusing to close the drawers all the way, every couple has things they repeatedly return to because both sides refuse to back down. Continue scrolling because we’ve selected some of the funniest examples from the thread. Upvote the ones you can relate to all too well, and be sure to share your own pet peeves with us in the comments!

Image credits: rabiasquared

#2

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Jontelle
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So true! I can send my SO to the store with a list and he’ll STILL mess up somehow.

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Karri Berkowitz
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mine leaves the sponge in the sink, every time, and it's always in the one spot with water and the food he didn't clean out. I have to throw it out

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Memere
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same. This is why I have to buy the big packs of sponges.

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Awsomemom52
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Leaving the dishcloth in the sink, wet and dirty. 😠 😤

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Christopher Creighton
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Throw the sponge in the top rack of the dishwasher if you have one. All good then.

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Horatio Jay
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My wife almost always forgets to do this, too. My life is an endless, mildewy hellscape.

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LagoonaBlueColleen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You need those scrubbies on a handle you can put the soap into.

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Joanna Jamil
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wait, your husbands do dishes? Mine plays dish Jenga

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Lp Johnson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

At least he's USING the darn sink. Mine acts like the water never works when he's got a bowl.

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Brian Allen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have a secret dish sponge I use when I need one. In the cabinet. Higher than others can reach. That's how much I hate that mildew smell from people not doing this. (Had a roommate once not be able to handle this. I showed him like "look it's not a special sponge. I just know it's dry as a bone." Something about it made him very upset haha.)

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Valerie G.
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

another reason to pop those sponges in the dishwasher regularly.

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Elaine Everett-Klimas
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mine does the same and NEVER EVER rinses the sink after doing the dishes, just leaves suds and bits in there. Yuck!

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Sarah Mathiason
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ditch the sponge, there are so many other options (even cleaner) and it's not worth fighting over.

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Caylee Rausch
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's better than sticking your hand in cold water just to empty the sink... I swear it's my worst nightmare! I think my gram does it just to spite me! Especially in the winter time... I don't know if she does it on purpose to spite me or if she thinks that is the way to save water... I want to scream everytime she does it! She doesn't even take the sponges out! She has a dishwasher but refuses to use it cuz "that's a waste of water" and "we don't have enough dishes for the use of a dishwasher"

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LivingTheDream
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Squishing it out doesn't work either. throw it in the dishwasher or in the microwave with some lemon

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Sonia Shanzer
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ew i hate that. I buy theses scrub buddy sponges, they dry really fast so they dont start to stink. Theyre great.

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Alana Voeks
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Get your own separate sponge and hide it. Embrace the pettiness! Taste the salt!

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Lyes Wecan
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My wife does that, she let the sponge full of water and when i grab it on a hurry it start dripping everywhere.. 20 years in october...

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I I
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

good to know its not just me going through that , now tell me he leaves the bin lid up after using it and you got my 30+ yr argument , WHY ??? why leave the lid to a bin open??? it stinks

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Dianna
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My husband does that everytime! I completely understand the show "why women kill"!!!@

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phil blanque
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, a six-year old needs time to learn. It is a six-year old, right?

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Rachel Betancort
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Just take it out and only you use it. He'll be happy he doesn't have to scrub anyway... win win

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CMDR unematti
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why doi have to read this here and nobody telling me?... At work they teach you how to do it. There's no training for life...waiiii

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L1z
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I cannot get behind using a sponge to wash dishes 🤢. At least a dish cloth can be washed after each use and then there's no concern about bacterial growth. Sponges are unpredictable in how much and when bacteria start to grow.

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Joey Marlin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't really get the difference. 😬 Both can be washed after each use. Use the microwave to nuke or go in the dishwasher. Rinse through with bleach, go in the washing machine... Why is a dish cloth any cleaner? Both can be placed carefully to air dry once clean or go manky when damp from bacteria. I'm not being funny, I would genuinely like to understand the difference. I wash any and all the things I use every single time of use. Just googled and WebMD said 'Your dish rags are really no better than your sponges' and to be honest, if you don't clean either, that makes far more sense.

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Michelle Kaiser
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Huge pet peeve of mine. I use Norwex's dish cloths and they are amazing. And you just throw them in the wash when necessary. One of the best things I've ever bought.

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Diane Tjerrild
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Two sponges, yours (mildew free) and theirs (slimey and smelly!)

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neb skram
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

sponges are so nasty why do you even have them in your kitchen? their is a reason they dont let sponges in a commercial kitchen or a restaurant kitchen yet you cry about ur guy not squashing it out

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LaToya Mack
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Scientifically speaking no wor should be using sponges they are never clean baby throw them all the way

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Maria Rodriguez
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2 years ago

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You mean you touch a used sponge??? Never ever they all smell.

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If Rabia Chaudry’s name sounds familiar, it might be because she’s the author of the New York Times bestselling book Adnan's Story. She has also amassed quite a following on Twitter where almost 202K users are engaged in what she has to say and, luckily for us, share their own funny and genuine stories. The post in question, which has received over 19K likes, proved that couples all over the world get peeved off by the most foolish things.

Hundreds of replies on this thread had to do with household tasks not being completed correctly. Well, at least in their partner's eyes. But whether you’re in a meaningful relationship or decided to tie the knot, sharing a space together is bound to be at least a bit of a challenge. At the bare minimum, you’ll have a partner that tells you you never fold the socks right.

#4

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Strawberry Pizza
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I believe some decorative plastic fruit would solve this problem. No rotting = no more buying fruit.

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#6

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When you decide to be with one person for a long time, it's only natural for the quirks you found sweet at the beginning of the relationship to irritate you as time flies. But those little habits sure have a way of blowing up into a major argument or at least something you always have at the back of your mind.

But not all fights are created equal. While some are more severe and worth talking through, others are downright ridiculous and illogical. "Partners often say, 'We argue over stupid things,'" licensed relationship therapist Dr. Jason N. Linder wrote in Psychology Today. "This is somewhat true. That said, there are a lot more things partners are actually arguing about under the surface than what meets the eye, especially for the partners themselves."

#7

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We have a TV series about these people: Help, my husband is a handyman.

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#9

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Ozacoter
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My partner was the same with decoration. I put some paintings, pictures and plants in the house and he kept whining about how i "invaded his space". Now i took them all out because we are moving and he was like "now the house looks so much uglier". I know.

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"Focusing on the content of arguments (i.e who forgot to mail the important package) misses the forest for the trees. What fights are really about is the emotional safety in a relationship, partner's subjective sense of the other’s caring from them (or being there for them), and fear that they will get hurt."

He explained that getting to what’s underneath leads us to the cause of arguments and relationship distress. "Partners need to learn to reach out to each other with those feelings such as sadness about the disconnection, feelings of failure or inadequacy, or fear of rejection.”

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Deborah B
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Leave it in the cabinet. Don't buy chips. "There's still a pack in the cupboard".

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Unfortunately, it might be easy to fall into the trap of thinking that fighting with your partner is a bad sign for the relationship itself. But we all know that every single couple has had at least one or two arguments. In fact, experts say that such disagreements can also be beneficial.

"I am more worried about my clients who say they never argue with their partners,” Maryann W. Mathai, a licensed counselor who specializes in helping people heal from toxic relationships, told Bustle. "It signals passivity, emotions being ignored, or a lack of self in the relationship — all of which are unhealthy."

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Next time put their laundry around the washing machine. When there are no clean clothes for them anymore, they will understand.

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#15

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Leo Domitrix
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I can sympathize with this, as you may have water on the floor if the shower is not closed off enough, and open drawers kill shinbones.

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Chores and other responsibilities are some of the most common argument topics between married couples. It’s important to distinguish, however, whether these silly quarrels are healthy or toxic for your relationship. For example, if you start nitpicking your partner about the way they wash the dishes but end up blatantly declaring you dislike the company of their parents, that’s a red flag for toxic communication patterns. When arguing, you stay focused on the topic and issue at hand, so avoid looking for opportunities to air other grievances.

#18

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D. Pitbull
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ahh... I guess I remove eggs like OP's wife... because we usually grab the carton from one end or the other, not in the front 'n' center... so the weight is evenly distributed...

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Mathai explained that while it is normal to need space after a disagreement, routinely withdrawing for days at a time shows your fights could be toxic. "Researchers have shown that stonewalling, the term for withdrawing and avoidance, is a predictor of divorce," she added. "Shutting down and emotionally leaving the conversation will trigger the other partner to feel alone and overwhelmed."

"You both may have different needs or time frames to cool down after an argument, but a sign of healthy relationships is [that] couples come back to each other quickly," Mathai explained. "There is truth behind the old saying 'Never go to bed angry.'"

After all, we're all guilty of having weird little quirks that might annoy people around us. Some of these behaviors are more benign, others are pretty bizarre. But as they say, communication is key, so if you find a way to talk through them and even sometimes kindly poke fun at them, you might be on the right path.

#19

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Green Machine
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I feel like the couples arguing over bars of soap should switch to liquid body wash. :)

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#20

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D. Pitbull
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

omg... my dad was like this... no matter how much time he had before the family had to leave for whatever... the MOMENT we're supposed to go out the door.... he had to go to the bathroom. It was. so. odd.

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#21

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Frances M
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You don’t have a spoon anyway, you have a solid lump of tea stained sugar with a metal bit sticking out the top.

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ToGo
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'll agree on the basis that I HATE when people nix ideas without offering a suggestion. I'm not your hired "idea's person".

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Karen Tyas
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Meanwhile he’s like “My wife is great, always puts gas in my car for me!”

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#28

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WilvanderHeijden
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pretend you didn't hear that he said something and keep pretending until he speaks so you can understand him. Rinse and repeat for as long as it takes to get the message home. I took me 6 weeks to teach my wife that, since I'm getting deaf, I can't hear her when she's whispering from the other side of the room.

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Ozacoter
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am sorry for op. That sounds like an awful partner

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Buren
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Agree to disagree and adopt new pronounciation such as cow-poo to save your marriage.

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#34

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Belinda Matson
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Put it in random places. On his pillow, his dashboard, in his drawers, at a crime scene.

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#35

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Leo Domitrix
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've learned to preface some questions with "It's yes or no question. One-word answer only. (Fill in question)." B/c I got tired of essay answers to yes-no questions. We've gotten around it over the years, but twenty-five years ago? It'd take him ten minutes to answer "yes" or "no" or for me to work out which it was. And the question would be something like, "Do you want dessert?"

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#38

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Madzdad the Bard
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My ex said it was an "accident" when she slept with someone else. What does that mean? He tripped and his d**k fell into your vagina?

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#39

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DuchessDegu
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wanna swap? I'm like that, if it's important put it away. My partner leaves everything anywhere and when he can't find it, he'd buy a new one or ask for a copy. Then leaves it anywhere and buys a third one when he can't find the previous two. I lost count of how many superglue, toothpick packs, torches, sealants and tin openers I found last time I went on a cleanup bender

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#40

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LH25
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

So buy her a pair of her own. If she wants to wear the old ones, you wear the new ones.

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Note: this post originally had 105 images. It’s been shortened to the top 40 images based on user votes.