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Does the Loch Ness Monster really exist? What happened to the crew of Mary Celeste? And what are guys up to when they're taking long showers? While we might never find out the answers to the first two mysteries, the latter has just been revealed. Together with a bunch of other men secrets most girls probably have no clue about. Recently, someone on reddit asked "What Are Some 'Guy Secrets' Girls Don't Know About?" and it got funnier and funnier with every answer. Amassing over 80K upvotes in just a few days, this post has become sort of like a diary of the 21st century man, and you couldn't make this stuff up. Scroll down to check out the entries and upvote your faves!
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#2
Luis Milian 7 years ago
"We are task orientated" absolutely true! we respond better with, "can you get me a blanket?" our brain process that faster than "I'm cold" statement.
#9
#15
Oathbraker 7 years ago
Lucky you. I had my hairdresser tell me I looked like a junkie because I had let my hair grow out. Needless to say I didn't visit her again.
#16
Prestigous Cactus 7 years ago
This is no secret, those who do this are heroes and are celebrated.
Outlier Babe 7 years ago
Oh for f*ck's sake! Do you live in the place? Do you poop in that toilet? Then take some cleaner and a brush and CLEAN the damned TOILET, instead of waiting all the time for your womanservant to do it. And after you clean INside, wipe up the OUTside, and floor, from all your microsplashes because you are too MANly to sit down like a sensible person who understands that liquids falling into liquids from heights cause splashes.
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Lise Personne 7 years ago
Yeah, I mean, I don't have a d**k, but if I did I would totally do that.
Aaron Kara 7 years ago
This is a revered and ancient art, used by monks - to clear the stain is to clear the mind
Lady Perkele 7 years ago
Now you are making me look for this on the internet because reading I cannot see if it's sarcasm or not 😂
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Wynand 7 years ago
Yep, it's a game we all play. Also, trying to finish peeing before the toilet finishes flushing.
Chris Jones 7 years ago
You do know that as the flushing is happening that it throws up into the air germs and micro particles of fecal matter? You are literally breathing in s**t. That's why the loo has a lid.
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Bettina Jansen 7 years ago
unless you're in a public loo, those shouldn't be there in the first place...
Jonny Chevalier 7 years ago
great idea. then again the bowl brush works as well... some times better...lol
Jus 7 years ago
Can't you just pee in a clean way and brush the toilet like every normal person? What's wrong with men that they contaminate the toilet area so much? I love clean toilets so I totally don't get it.
Hugo Raible 7 years ago
Not our poop stains. Or the ones that we just made, so we need to do less brushing.
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Rebecca Rogers 6 years ago
I learned this fact when a guy explained the meaning behind the song "Poop Ship Destroyer" by Ween to me
Giacomo Medici 7 years ago
..and get annoyed when you run out of fuel before stain is removed!!
rhyan lumilay 7 years ago
there are those that after flushing their dumps, didn't have a time to second look whether there are poop stain remains in the bowl, we guys just love to aim with our pee ^_^.
Sophie Warner 7 years ago
OK, but how does it get on the radiator, which is at a right angle to the toilet? Or do I just know some talented dudes!?
A Dyke From The Dreamworld 7 years ago
The heroes we need but don't deserve. Thank you for your silent, thankless work.
Kerry Schulstad 7 years ago
I gave a blank stare to hubby and he say ‘didn’t you know I do that, the poop stains miraculously disappear after I’ve peed’ 😂
#18
#19
Brandon Collinsworth 7 years ago
I laughed at this for way too long, because I can't think of a single time I tied something down and didn't say that.
#22
Oathbraker 7 years ago
And it also smells nice. I think shampoo smells better than most of the expensive perfumes.
#28
Luis Milian 7 years ago
true! even for those of us who are short. We will jump just to fulfill our primal instinct
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What do you think ?
Kaisu Rei 7 years ago (edited)
It's good to have open conversations about men's insecurities and issues too, and there always needs to be mutual open communication in a relationship, regardless of whether that's a male/female or male/male or female/female relationship because people are different and express themselves and their needs differently
Bunzilla 7 years ago
It really is so important. Sadly, there are still a lot of people out there who mock this sort of thing, and it makes me so sad. We're all human beings, we all deserve the same right to express our feelings without fear.
Load More Replies...
Kurtz Frausun 7 years ago
We are often ashamed of showing emotion because it's been used against us in the past. "He cries! lol. What a weakling." We go to the bathroom and cry, letting out emotion in solitude and come back with extra Machismo to mask it.
Jana Renner 7 years ago
This makes me so mad/sad. I am middle-aged and even in my childhood it was considered normal for girls and boys to cry and show emotions. How can it be that a generation later men still have to deal with being allowed to act HUMAN? :(
Load More Replies...
Aaron Kara 7 years ago (edited)
Also I think, I'm not sure, but I think most men want to be a hero, whether it's in a symbolic or a literal sense, we want the chance to be redeemable and respected. The chance to come to someones aid, to defend someones honor, to save the day - it sounds a bit wanky and can apply to women as well, but there's something to it I think
Private Custard 7 years ago
For years, I've wanted a flight attendant to come out and ask the passengers if anyone can land a plane. I would be there so fast!
Load More Replies...
Darryl Kerrigan 7 years ago
I was expecting more brutal truths. But glad to see the fraternity stayed strong! ;)
Gracie Mae 7 years ago
i would have LOVED to see some brutal truths--some of us actually learn from them
Load More Replies...
Nomadus Aureus 7 years ago (edited)
I think one of the greatest "secret" I've learned about men is that they get anxious about starting a family as well. In my culture, there is this whole scheme they feed you, that you as a woman should procreate no-matter what, that you are worth only your reproductive capability, besides you have a shelf-life, etc. etc. I guess it just never occurred to me that men could possibly get worried about such a thing.
Jeanneke van Berkel 7 years ago
My husband never tells me he liked my food. I have to watch and when he takes seconds, it means he likes it. But if he just finishes his plate and doesn't take seconds, it doesn't mean that he didn't like it, it can also mean that he just isn't that hungry, that he ate too many cookies and ruined his apetite, or that he is in a hurry and will take seconds later in the evening, or that he was just thinking about going to the loo, or that he sees a blue elephant, or.......
Hugo Raible 7 years ago
I need whatever ingredient you used which made him see blue elephants.
Load More Replies...
Zori the degu 7 years ago
To be fairly honest, I'm a woman and can still relate to some of these, like the ones about zoning off and thinking about opening a brewery in the middle of nowhere and the story about the T-rex. Also, the two drops rule ending up on your pants is valid for both sexes. Not having toilet paper at hand(because someone else finished it and didn't put a new roll)sucks.
Victoria Rey Piuma 7 years ago
I loved this post. Sometimes you guys seem so sure and unassailable, that I feel superfluous. It's very very nice to hear sometimes that what's going on in your head is actually pretty similar. And that you also worry if we like you back and stuff. (And that it doesn't matter that I cut my hair) And just to share, I had an American boyfriend once and he was always raised with the idea that men and women were fundamentally different. We're not. We're all human first and are insecure and shy and trip and stuff. Only after that comes the gender thing. And even though I knew it, you still tend to overlook it. That's why it's nice to see posts like this from time to time. And trust us, we usually operate on the premise that you aren't attracted to us. Please let us know, only take care of where so if the girl turns out to be mean you have a buffer. Also most of us dislike the high maintenance b****y girls too, don't judge us all by their a*s backwards behaviour. Thanks!
Darryl Kerrigan 7 years ago
It's very true. I was raised with 'men are from Mars, women are from Venus' where really it should be "The solar system is big and empty, all life is amazing'"
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Hallie 7 years ago
I'm so fed up of this 'be obvious' bs. Your wives and girlfriends are not your carers, mothers or nurses. If you see something needs doing, do it. You do not need to be asked. Some men like to hide behind a wall of 'stupidity' in order to get out of things. 'You're better at it than me anyway' or 'I'd just do it wrong so you should do it' etc etc. You are not idiots, but have been conditioned by society to act this way.
Jeanneke van Berkel 7 years ago
I think I explained 500 times not to mix whites with colors when he does the laundry. His answer is always: then do it yourself. Gives him an excuse not to do it at all.... But then next time same thing happens...
Load More Replies...
Victoria Rey Piuma 7 years ago
Aww. .... If you were here you'd get the biggest hug ever!
Load More Replies...
Michael Smith 7 years ago
Im older and I used to be fit, my hair used to be black,I had no wrinkles,etc. I know it happens to us all but no matter how I work out the skin still isnt youthful any longer. I eat/drink healthy and I have still gotten cellulite now. Im still adjusting and some compliments from her would go so far. Believe me I know what my issues are but Id like for everyone else to pretend theyre not there or Im just being OCD.
Jo Choto 7 years ago
Quite curious how a lot of these comments are along the lines of "women, change how you communicate, so that we don't have to."
Darryl Kerrigan 7 years ago (edited)
And if the post was 'women tell men things they don't know' it would probably be reversed..
Load More Replies... ivan bolitekurac 7 years ago
I feel like a hero when i fix something she asked me to.The more witnesses the better.
Steve Payne 7 years ago
Women need to learn where the guys G Spot is.... and no its not what you think. This will take the guy to a whole new level. Ask your guy..... and if he doesnt know..... prostate ladies prostate.....
Άρης Παπαδόπουλος 7 years ago
I like the aroma of your own body, not the perfume's or the deodorant's
Chris Staddon 7 years ago
Most men can't stand reality soaps (TOWIE, Geordie Shore, Made In Chelsea etc), and even more men think the cast are not worthy of the status of "celeb". And they're not. They're famous for what, exactly. On the flip side... Dangermouse and Bagpuss? Legends.
Victoria Rey Piuma 7 years ago
Wow @tjler sounds like you got run over by angry femdomme with pms and kicked to the curb for being too pussy and moany. Issues much?
Eric Lafleur 4 years ago
We are NOT mind readers! You need something? Ask for it! Want to say something? SAY it! "Something wrong, hun?" Don't say no if it's the opposite! For me, No and nothing realy means NO and NOTHING.
Richard Murray 6 years ago
Reading the responses from women to these, it's clear why so many men are starting to be happy being single. You're all showing your toxic femininity.
Cara S 7 years ago
So good to know, though we're on a break ,really hoping that I could kiss him back
Ruth Beaty 7 years ago
These are kinda funny and kinda sad, but true of most of the men I've known. Basically we're all just people and the same things.
Gracie Mae 7 years ago
a lot of these should be common sense--times have changed from the male of the 40s-50s that didn't share their feelings or cook or have more involvement in raising their kids. a lot of these can be said for males as well as females--like, stop hinting and just ask for what you want. Men are people too & need compliments & affirmations just like women do. Give me a man that's not afraid to open up & be himself around me ANY day!
Luisa Vasconcelos 7 years ago (edited)
No advise/comment/how girls should react on the famous " I'm naked , but your d**k is sleeping" or the "how come that you finished if I didn't even started ?". On a way that don't hurt men's
Laura Hurst 7 years ago
Everybody saying “its a ppl thing” just shut up. Having these men express their “secrets” are actually pretty awesome and having u s**t on it saying “ohh duhh me too!” is aggravating. This is about them FOR ONCE. Damn it🙄
Kaisu Rei 7 years ago
This is a social media site where people are sharing their own experiences for solidarity's sake and to show men that "hey you're not alone in this, everyone does this" because it can make you feel alone and misunderstood if you feel like people can't understand where you come from. So I don't understand how it's s******g on it to say "me too" when this is a social media site where people are supposed to share their thoughts and experiences??
Load More Replies...
Victoria Rey Piuma 7 years ago
Ga away you annoying f**k. People like you keep the problem going. It's not pitied and not gentle it's finding common ground. If you're so narrow minded you can't see that just go away
Load More Replies...
Daria B 7 years ago
"Women think and assume too much." → talking about assumptions....
Load More Replies...
Kaisu Rei 7 years ago (edited)
It's good to have open conversations about men's insecurities and issues too, and there always needs to be mutual open communication in a relationship, regardless of whether that's a male/female or male/male or female/female relationship because people are different and express themselves and their needs differently
Bunzilla 7 years ago
It really is so important. Sadly, there are still a lot of people out there who mock this sort of thing, and it makes me so sad. We're all human beings, we all deserve the same right to express our feelings without fear.
Load More Replies... Kurtz Frausun 7 years ago
We are often ashamed of showing emotion because it's been used against us in the past. "He cries! lol. What a weakling." We go to the bathroom and cry, letting out emotion in solitude and come back with extra Machismo to mask it.
Jana Renner 7 years ago
This makes me so mad/sad. I am middle-aged and even in my childhood it was considered normal for girls and boys to cry and show emotions. How can it be that a generation later men still have to deal with being allowed to act HUMAN? :(
Load More Replies... Aaron Kara 7 years ago (edited)
Also I think, I'm not sure, but I think most men want to be a hero, whether it's in a symbolic or a literal sense, we want the chance to be redeemable and respected. The chance to come to someones aid, to defend someones honor, to save the day - it sounds a bit wanky and can apply to women as well, but there's something to it I think
Private Custard 7 years ago
For years, I've wanted a flight attendant to come out and ask the passengers if anyone can land a plane. I would be there so fast!
Load More Replies... Darryl Kerrigan 7 years ago
I was expecting more brutal truths. But glad to see the fraternity stayed strong! ;)
Gracie Mae 7 years ago
i would have LOVED to see some brutal truths--some of us actually learn from them
Load More Replies... Nomadus Aureus 7 years ago (edited)
I think one of the greatest "secret" I've learned about men is that they get anxious about starting a family as well. In my culture, there is this whole scheme they feed you, that you as a woman should procreate no-matter what, that you are worth only your reproductive capability, besides you have a shelf-life, etc. etc. I guess it just never occurred to me that men could possibly get worried about such a thing.
Jeanneke van Berkel 7 years ago
My husband never tells me he liked my food. I have to watch and when he takes seconds, it means he likes it. But if he just finishes his plate and doesn't take seconds, it doesn't mean that he didn't like it, it can also mean that he just isn't that hungry, that he ate too many cookies and ruined his apetite, or that he is in a hurry and will take seconds later in the evening, or that he was just thinking about going to the loo, or that he sees a blue elephant, or.......
Hugo Raible 7 years ago
I need whatever ingredient you used which made him see blue elephants.
Load More Replies... Zori the degu 7 years ago
To be fairly honest, I'm a woman and can still relate to some of these, like the ones about zoning off and thinking about opening a brewery in the middle of nowhere and the story about the T-rex. Also, the two drops rule ending up on your pants is valid for both sexes. Not having toilet paper at hand(because someone else finished it and didn't put a new roll)sucks.
Victoria Rey Piuma 7 years ago
I loved this post. Sometimes you guys seem so sure and unassailable, that I feel superfluous. It's very very nice to hear sometimes that what's going on in your head is actually pretty similar. And that you also worry if we like you back and stuff. (And that it doesn't matter that I cut my hair) And just to share, I had an American boyfriend once and he was always raised with the idea that men and women were fundamentally different. We're not. We're all human first and are insecure and shy and trip and stuff. Only after that comes the gender thing. And even though I knew it, you still tend to overlook it. That's why it's nice to see posts like this from time to time. And trust us, we usually operate on the premise that you aren't attracted to us. Please let us know, only take care of where so if the girl turns out to be mean you have a buffer. Also most of us dislike the high maintenance b****y girls too, don't judge us all by their a*s backwards behaviour. Thanks!
Darryl Kerrigan 7 years ago
It's very true. I was raised with 'men are from Mars, women are from Venus' where really it should be "The solar system is big and empty, all life is amazing'"
Load More Replies... Hallie 7 years ago
I'm so fed up of this 'be obvious' bs. Your wives and girlfriends are not your carers, mothers or nurses. If you see something needs doing, do it. You do not need to be asked. Some men like to hide behind a wall of 'stupidity' in order to get out of things. 'You're better at it than me anyway' or 'I'd just do it wrong so you should do it' etc etc. You are not idiots, but have been conditioned by society to act this way.
Jeanneke van Berkel 7 years ago
I think I explained 500 times not to mix whites with colors when he does the laundry. His answer is always: then do it yourself. Gives him an excuse not to do it at all.... But then next time same thing happens...
Load More Replies... Victoria Rey Piuma 7 years ago
Aww. .... If you were here you'd get the biggest hug ever!
Load More Replies... Michael Smith 7 years ago
Im older and I used to be fit, my hair used to be black,I had no wrinkles,etc. I know it happens to us all but no matter how I work out the skin still isnt youthful any longer. I eat/drink healthy and I have still gotten cellulite now. Im still adjusting and some compliments from her would go so far. Believe me I know what my issues are but Id like for everyone else to pretend theyre not there or Im just being OCD.
Jo Choto 7 years ago
Quite curious how a lot of these comments are along the lines of "women, change how you communicate, so that we don't have to."
Darryl Kerrigan 7 years ago (edited)
And if the post was 'women tell men things they don't know' it would probably be reversed..
Load More Replies... ivan bolitekurac 7 years ago
I feel like a hero when i fix something she asked me to.The more witnesses the better.
Steve Payne 7 years ago
Women need to learn where the guys G Spot is.... and no its not what you think. This will take the guy to a whole new level. Ask your guy..... and if he doesnt know..... prostate ladies prostate.....
Άρης Παπαδόπουλος 7 years ago
I like the aroma of your own body, not the perfume's or the deodorant's
Chris Staddon 7 years ago
Most men can't stand reality soaps (TOWIE, Geordie Shore, Made In Chelsea etc), and even more men think the cast are not worthy of the status of "celeb". And they're not. They're famous for what, exactly. On the flip side... Dangermouse and Bagpuss? Legends.
Victoria Rey Piuma 7 years ago
Wow @tjler sounds like you got run over by angry femdomme with pms and kicked to the curb for being too pussy and moany. Issues much?
Eric Lafleur 4 years ago
We are NOT mind readers! You need something? Ask for it! Want to say something? SAY it! "Something wrong, hun?" Don't say no if it's the opposite! For me, No and nothing realy means NO and NOTHING.
Richard Murray 6 years ago
Reading the responses from women to these, it's clear why so many men are starting to be happy being single. You're all showing your toxic femininity.
Cara S 7 years ago
So good to know, though we're on a break ,really hoping that I could kiss him back
Ruth Beaty 7 years ago
These are kinda funny and kinda sad, but true of most of the men I've known. Basically we're all just people and the same things.
Gracie Mae 7 years ago
a lot of these should be common sense--times have changed from the male of the 40s-50s that didn't share their feelings or cook or have more involvement in raising their kids. a lot of these can be said for males as well as females--like, stop hinting and just ask for what you want. Men are people too & need compliments & affirmations just like women do. Give me a man that's not afraid to open up & be himself around me ANY day!
Luisa Vasconcelos 7 years ago (edited)
No advise/comment/how girls should react on the famous " I'm naked , but your d**k is sleeping" or the "how come that you finished if I didn't even started ?". On a way that don't hurt men's
Laura Hurst 7 years ago
Everybody saying “its a ppl thing” just shut up. Having these men express their “secrets” are actually pretty awesome and having u s**t on it saying “ohh duhh me too!” is aggravating. This is about them FOR ONCE. Damn it🙄
Kaisu Rei 7 years ago
This is a social media site where people are sharing their own experiences for solidarity's sake and to show men that "hey you're not alone in this, everyone does this" because it can make you feel alone and misunderstood if you feel like people can't understand where you come from. So I don't understand how it's s******g on it to say "me too" when this is a social media site where people are supposed to share their thoughts and experiences??
Load More Replies... Victoria Rey Piuma 7 years ago
Ga away you annoying f**k. People like you keep the problem going. It's not pitied and not gentle it's finding common ground. If you're so narrow minded you can't see that just go away
Load More Replies... Daria B 7 years ago
"Women think and assume too much." → talking about assumptions....
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