ADVERTISEMENT

Marriage is all about compromise. That's the idea anyway. But compromise has many meanings. And sometimes it means doing what your wife tells you to do and accepting that she's right, regardless of how much evidence you have to the contrary.

Take a look at these hilarious tweets to see what we mean. Compiled by Bored Panda, the list is sure to resonate with husbands and wives everywhere. Because while how to load a dishwasher correctly or how to put the milk back in the fridge properly are essential discussion points for any marriage, sometimes it helps to remember that a happy wife means a happy life. Sometimes.

(h/t: 22 words)
#1

Funny Tweet About Wife

granttanaka Report

J Irish Ramos
Community Member
9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

lol just added more "to do" lists on your list. ????

Thomas Victorien
Community Member
9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Brilliant...Is that what you are supposed to do when you are married? Gees...

RELATED:
    #2

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    justinguarini Report

    Pi...
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hope the kittens were adopted from a shelter!

    Lance Boil
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If they weren't you should probably drown them in a bucket and go get two from a shelter

    Load More Replies...
    Kathy Black
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So, who's going to clean the litterbox?

    #3

    Funny Wife Tweet

    ValeeGrrl Report

    Heather Burdett Holloway
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My husband just said that is 2 forms of disappointment.

    Paul Kerr
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Was it a 2 or a 4 finger Kit Kat lol

    Carly Noelle
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Must've been an awkward conversation . . . .

    laura_hills1102
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hahahahahaa thats really funny but kind of sad on your husbands side.

    View more comments
    #4

    Funny Wife Tweet

    hatfieldanne Report

    Pi...
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Guffaw! This made my day!

    Dakota Zayat
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Kids:*crying* "MOMMY WHERE ARE THE COCOA PUFFS?!" Mom:"Lord Melbourne ate them all"

    Kylie Jane Dixon
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is one lucky guy, that is hilarious!

    View more comments
    ADVERTISEMENT
    #5

    Funny Wife Tweet

    peachesanscream Report

    Kathy Black
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially if you haven't even deposited the coins yet.

    Kaitlyn Neal
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They never got a free antique (40-60yrs old) rocking chair in perfect condition..

    Sprockie Westerman
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Or a kitkat made entirely of chocolate!

    LeeAnn Floyd
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That would ruin my day. I like to peel the chocolate edges off mine so that it's just wafers with top and bottom chocolate

    Load More Replies...
    ADVERTISEMENT
    #6

    Funny Wife Tweet

    MommaUnfiltered Report

    Melody Lanzatella
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    my husband still talks about that one time he washed A DISH! (1992)

    Tere Ennas
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I still have no idea if I load the dishwasher correctly. I live by myself so it's anarchy.

    Michel Guntern
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It will, if he spends the rest of his time earning the money.

    Sonja Grubbs
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mine still talks about the one time he cooked dinner. Seriously, one time and he's never BBQ'd either. Makes me question my choices...

    Kathy Black
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Harvard Hotel, the kitchen staff always has openings.

    Robert Bailey
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never knew there was such a thing as loading it "correctly."

    Dakota Zayat
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yea bc their kids are going to clean dishes at Harvard XD

    #7

    Funny Wife Tweet

    wife_housy Report

    Lorraine
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So all husbands are just like this? I thought he might get smarter over time ... guess I just have to deal with it!

    Jewel Cowart
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hubby: where's the ketchup. Add he looks all around in fridge. Me: i can see it from where I'm sitting. Him: where? Me: in going to be Really mad if i actually have to cone get it fir you. Him: oh here it is

    Load More Replies...
    Debbi Lynn
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Male refrigerator blindness claims yet another victim.

    Load More Replies...
    Eileen Sullivan
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Been married 50 year next November...time doesn't change this. Oh, well.

    Kathy Black
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    41 years for us in September. When he offers to "clean up after supper" it means I have to clean up after his clean up. He still gets the same sheepish grin. Oh well, if that's the worst thing that happens to me I'm blessed.

    Load More Replies...
    Cat Shadley
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes I just say i don't know where things are to see what happens. An experiment, if you will. Resolution? He usually finds the items hahahaaaa

    Sue Jensen
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know this situation very well!

    ''-Kelly Hughes-''
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One month and the father started asking me where things were

    Älly Đunn
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is this stereotype so true?!

    View more comments
    #8

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    XplodingUnicorn Report

    Dakota Zayat
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wife:What do you want for dinner Husband:Uhh lasagna sounds good W:wrong, we're having burgers H:WHY ARE YOU EVEN ASKING ME THEN W:you woundnt understand its a girl thing

    Kathy Black
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have to leave this line of thought, I'm laughing so loud I woke my husband twice.

    Kathy Black
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Snappy answer to stupid question, 2016 version.

    Luca Avalle
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's like when they asked you to "suggest" stuff to add to the shopping list at the supermarket and you dare change 1 if the items they put in

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #9

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    TheAlexNevil Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #10

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    theboydp Report

    Sarah Diehl
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's amazing and I'm sorry, lmao!

    View more comments
    #11

    Funny Wife Tweet

    toujours_fab Report

    Vanessa
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't understand, he should be proud :D

    Alexandru Diaconescu
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just like I used to introduce my wife as "my favorite wife"... ;)

    Bonni Poch
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My husband has been introducing me as his first wife for the 18 years we've been married. There's no foreseeable end to this stale joke. SMH. (love him anyway)

    Alexandra Smith
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mom does this and they've been married 52 years

    Lou Varner
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    a friend of mine has been married several times she introduces her's as her current husband

    Dakota Zayat
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Read that and then look at her profile pic XD that smile though

    Rise Filipiniana
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Coz she's planning to get a 2nd husband

    View more comments
    #12

    Funny Wife Tweet

    hatfieldanne Report

    Kathy Black
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pay no attention to that towel so artfully arranged around the base of the chair, and Red is still your favorite color, right?

    Sabah Shaikh
    Community Member
    8 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😂 true story only here its tge patriot's game

    Dakota Zayat
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    there are two types of men in this world: those who watch golf, and those who watch football

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #13

    Funny Wife Tweet

    est1975blog Report

    Joanna Kan
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg, they get a cold and they're such cry babies!

    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They are the same when it comes to having to get shots. I have 2 brothers, and they always freaked out while my sister and I just got it over with, I've seen many guys since then freak about shots.

    Load More Replies...
    Jewel Cowart
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Rofl exactly. Oh man they are babies

    Tracy Keough Spatz
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I gave mine PM instead of regular Tylenol so I caould take a shower.

    Beth Clark-Craig
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lmao!!!! Right?!?!?! I pray that my hubby never gets sick. :)

    Kalikima
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My hubby will go to work with a cold and deny being sick, work his long hard day, then come home and literally become as helpless as a 6 month old...with insanely advanced potty training thank you...

    Kathy Black
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As does our son, as does His son, and so on and so on to perpetuity.... sigh

    View more comments
    ADVERTISEMENT
    #16

    Funny Wife Tweet

    3sunzzz Report

    Melody Lanzatella
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What has NEED got to do with anything!?

    Pi...
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We NEED the backstory on this one! :D

    Load More Replies...
    ADVERTISEMENT
    #17

    Funny Wife Tweet

    Marlebean Report

    Kalikima
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Beautiful! Thank you for the unexpected laugh after what is the most painful decision of my life.

    Georgia Stergiadis
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm not even married, and I found this hilarious!

    Sree Gunturi
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    too bad the husbands would nt do that .. cause they would need to visit the devil

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #18

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    KentWGraham Report

    Robert Bailey
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is one of them about loading a dishwasher correctly?

    Vicki Ibarra
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    4 of them are directly related to loading a dishwasher.

    Load More Replies...
    Crystal Rose
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or maybe it's because you can't find anything on your own even when it's under your nose! ;(

    #19

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    amishschool Report

    Na-eema
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Probably because you always asking her where they are, when they right in front of you.

    Lazy Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ya it's soooo hard to tell the difference between keys, llamas, and feta cheese

    #20

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    _troyjohnson Report

    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you use the bathroom at your single guy friend's house, and there's a hand towel, DO NOT use it... best to let your hands air dry.

    Enea
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's so funny, but actually it's my parents who have those special towels designated for... well, I think they got them after getting married and they have never been used. (And I am 35). Do people still have that?

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT
    #22

    Funny Wife Tweet

    cjohnsonking5 Report

    Casey Sheridan
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Listen, if a man says he'll do something, then there's no need to constantly nag him about it every six months.

    #23

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    kentwgraham Report

    Lauren Fowler
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like real tears right now!! This is totally me! Anytime he complains I remind him of childbirth and the 9 months before

    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #25

    Funny Wife Tweet

    WorkingMom86 Report

    Angelfire Cantu
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is sooooooo my hubby!!!! Lol!!!

    Lauren Fowler
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg so I'm not alone!! Anytime I go out of town without him he tells me he spends waaay to much time sitting at the edge of the bed wondering what the heck to do next!

    Lauren Fowler
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg so I'm not alone with this!! My husband said anytime I leave the state without him he notices that he just sits on the edge of the bed wondering what the hell to do. ????????????????????

    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #26

    Funny Wife Tweet

    StellaGMaddox Report

    Ali Frye
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh my freakin Gods!!! That's f'#%king funny!!!

    #27

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    iwearaonesie Report

    Alison Hulme- Weakley
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ???????????????????????????????????? so funny, but yes so true ????????????????????????????????

    Alison Hulme- Weakley
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Silly phone !! The ? Are supposed to be laughing faces with tears. :D

    Load More Replies...
    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #28

    Funny Wife Tweet

    OtherBolandGirl Report

    Mary Groat-McIntosh
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do that and it doesn't phase him. Its no punishment for him lol

    Nizha Ariotejo
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    graaaahhhh...this is so my husband, and i really hate when he did that...

    #29

    Funny Wife Tweet

    kbdub724 Report

    Tatiana Dem
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He might need a brain transplant first!

    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #30

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    simoncholland Report

    Amanda Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is a real thing, even in same sex relationships. Everyone has their comfort temp

    Kalikima
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm always hot, all the time, and I'm lucky cuz my hubbys always freezing cold. I convinced him that there was nothing beyond living in a jacuzzi to make him warm... But I'm always hot and that can be made better by keeping it cold year round, and since he'll be just as cold as if the window was shut...

    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #32

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    simoncholland Report

    .gas.
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's like the low fat, sugar-free cookies in our house. What's the point?!

    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    ADVERTISEMENT
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #35

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    AndyAsAdjective Report

    Kalikima
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't worry, you're funnier...

    #36

    Funny Wife Tweet

    mommy_cusses Report

    Wynk2u
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seriously! I seem to be the only one who lives here that always has to change the roll! Four ppl live here!!

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #38

    Funny Tweet About Wife

    TheMichaelRock Report

    Justdoit
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes! Because he drags them all over the house, the car, the garage or God knows where else!!

    Kaitlyn Neal
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes!! My ex would take mine to his work. I have one. He has 5. Mine doesn't overheat and make me think it will catch fire any minute.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #39

    Funny Wife Tweet

    BossyBritches72 Report

    Julia Daly
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Entirely relatable and I don't even know why I do it at this point

    Jewel Cowart
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Rude and nit funny

    #40

    Funny Wife Tweet

    myboots111 Report

    Tami Urban
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My husband has a knack for calling me just as I get ready to swipe my card at check out!

    #41

    Funny Wife Tweet

    michelleames Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #42

    Funny Wife Tweet

    ReeseButCallMeV Report

    mrstregs
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My favorite was when my husband blew up the microwave, and blamed the cat!!!!! thKR7DJ88J...6d4404.jpg thKR7DJ88J-57698ae6d4404.jpg

    Jeremy Allen
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good Thing he didn't blow up the cat and blame the microwave, That's when you got to worry

    Load More Replies...
    Lazy Panda
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    DIDNT BLOW IT UP! IT WAS HIM! P2: that's a snail. P1: A SNAIL WITH A DEVIOUS GRIN

    Kelvano
    Community Member
    9 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    More importantly how did you break the toaster? Answer: With that almighty massive rack of yours!

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #45

    Funny Wife Tweet

    emily_simms81 Report

    Tânia López Granifo
    Community Member
    9 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Are you using my shirts again?" "Why my shirts are your pijamas?" Same thing. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    ADVERTISEMENT
    ADVERTISEMENT