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50 Times Signs Were So Funny, This Person Decided To Start A Twitter Thread
Interview With Author
Here’s the truth and nothing but the truth—we have a massive soft spot for hilarious signs. And whenever we come across some during our digital hikes through social media, we can’t wait to share them with you, Pandas. After all, a few good laughs can brighten pretty much anyone’s day.
Content creator @Kwintarget, aka ‘drone on a cruise,’ brought a lot of comedy into people’s lives after he shared a series of thoroughly funny signs—both intentional and otherwise—on Twitter. The pics were so good that the thread went viral. We’re sharing the best from the thread (plus a few other gems from the internet) with you, so scroll on down and upvote your fave ones, dear Readers.
Tell us in the comments which signs (and typos!) made you laugh until you had to excuse yourselves. And if you’ve recently come across any hilarious signs, tell us all about them, too. Happy scrolling! Oh, and don't forget to check out @Kwintarget's other awesome threads.
Twitter user @Kwintarget was kind enough to answer Bored Panda's questions about his thread and told us a bit about himself as a content creator. He told us that he believes "laughter can go a long way" and it's part of the reason why he makes similar funny threads. "Speaking for myself, memes and funny tweets make me loosen up a bit after a long day and I’m sure most people relate to that," he said.
Meanwhile, comedy writer Ariane Sherine, from the United Kingdom, also shared her thoughts about humorous signs, how to make sure they get the message across, as well as how to avoid typos with Bored Panda.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Yup
Oliver Seitz 3 years ago
Even a clown could get president... And now he tries it again just to avoid prison...
James016 3 years ago
If this is a reference to Trump the test at Daytona beach, this guy drove down the beach itself in a huge truck with all these pro Trump flags attached to the back. He insulted a random woman and drove on. According to the guy who runs the food truck, he does that every day. My wife and I found it comical. The locals think he is an attention seeker.
Tara Moov 3 years ago
I'm not a local but I also think he's an attention seeker!
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Kelly Boekhout 3 years ago
Yes apparently cult leaders can be president. We may as well have had Jim Jones in the white house
@Kwintarget, the author of the viral Twitter thread, agreed that fonts are important tools when making signs. "However, a readable and understandable sign will do better. You can dip humor and be a little extra, works for some."
He told Bored Panda that as a content creator, he tries to be versatile and touches upon a wide range of different topics. "I don’t stick to only one topic, let’s say movies."
RELATED:
#2
Hear Them Out
Nonna_SoF 3 years ago
Reminds me of the Florida man who went to the cops complaining the drugs he was sold were fake. The cops kindly offered to test them for free. They weren't fake.
Pam Akers 3 years ago
HaHAH! I live in Florida and actually remember this idiot.
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Josurf 3 years ago
I always said that the best way to stop drugs criminality is to make drugs legal. Hear me out: if drugs are legal and affordable, only real drug addicts will buy them (which they do now anyway). No one will try to make new drug addicts (no more pushers), no crime will be committed to sell drugs, no competition will exist between criminal gangs, no hush-money will be paid, no people will owe money to gangster groups. No high placed politician or other lawmen will ever get a bribe for "closing an eye" on drugs traffic anymore. There will be no more drug addicts than now because just because something is legal doesn't make it more attractive. On the contrary: something is more attractive because it's illegal.
Powerful Katrinka 3 years ago
This approach was tried in Portugal, with resounding success. Crime rates plummeted, money that was used for antidrug enforcement was freed up for other uses. Corruption was reduced. More than that, the number of users who overdosed was drastically cut. Even more than that? The overall numbers of people struggling with addiction dropped. In other words, the exact opposite of the results the naysayers predicted.
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#3
You Heard
Down With Agent Hedgehog! 3 years ago
Well that would’ve been nice to know before I set the dogs on the 10-second bull. My dogs do 11.
Valerie Anne 3 years ago
"Challenge accepted!" These were the last words of the latest winner of the Darwin Award.
"Of course, it’s not always about comedy, it could be educational and inspirational like the thread I made about mirrors and cameras," the content creator said.
"I’m also original. I don’t steal my ideas from other people's threads. I’m quite knowledgeable with a little bit of research to make it work."
Bored Panda was curious about the kind of impact that humor has on the public when it's featured in everyday spaces, e.g. in the form of witty signs. Comedy writer Ariane told us that this can actually help the locals feel better.
"I think most people greatly appreciate humor. It lifts our spirits, relaxes us, and provides a moment of escapism," she said that there are a ton of benefits that come from having a laugh (or two!).
"It's also largely unexpected in everyday public spaces so gives us some welcome respite from the dull norm," she said that humor can pack an extra punch when we least expect it and help us take a break from ruminating on our daily grind.
#4
A Trip To The Zoo
Anonymous 3 years ago (edited)
The bark is far bigger than the bite here. Crocodiles and snakes aren't inherebtly aggressive towards humans. It's almost always done out of self defense.
Karen Klinck Klinck 3 years ago
Yes, but the average idiot who'd do that doesn't know this.
Load More Replies... #5
We All Have Our Breaking Points, Don’t We
Josurf 3 years ago
9 months later somebody else finds a baby under his wiper saying:"the condom you gave me was perforated... please take care of this..."
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BoopBoop 3 years ago
I occasionally see people parking like d***s, but I try to think that maybe they were rushing for a good reason, or were distracted because they just got terrible news. It's terrible to go through life assuming that everyone is just being an a*****e for no reason. Bad things happen to people. Be kind.
Donald Holder 3 years ago
Well, if it's truly a a*****e, then save the condom. Reproduction takes a cervix.
#6
Clear Warning
Deborah Harris 3 years ago
Next poster says 'alternative Easter egg hunt, bring your own shovel'
Down With Agent Hedgehog! 3 years ago
And the next ‘Free Halloween Skeleton Ornaments. bring own shovel.’
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Kyra DarkStar 3 years ago
Saw a sign many years ago that said, "Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again".
Tracy Jimenez 3 years ago
The police got a laugh when they saw that sign on our driveway gate behind the dead body they were investigating. (it wasn't us that did it)
The comedy writer shared some tips on how to make your sign pack a punch and get the kind of message—humorous or otherwise—across in the way that we intended.
"Make sure they're punchy, straight to the point, and spelled correctly," Ariane noted that brevity and clarity are vital.
"Edit out any superfluous or extraneous words and run the copy past a few people to see if the joke lands," she suggested what any witty sign creators-to-be should keep in mind.
We also wanted comedy writer Ariane's opinion on getting rid of ambiguity and avoiding any typos on signs. "Before finalizing the signs, show them to people to gauge their responses," the comedy expert told Bored Panda that running a small version of a focus group to see how folks respond isn't a bad idea.
#7
May We Never Experience A Year Like 2020 Ever Again
Colin Timp 3 years ago
That is until the sicko comes in without a mask and drops his drawers in front of everyone....
Two_rolling_black_eyes 3 years ago
I think we'll be talking about 2020 nostalgically in a couple years. 'Having to put on a mask wasn't that big of a deal considering we now have to wear a stillsuit from Dune to walk 10 miles to get water. Its the one well that doesn't have nazi nanobots and Uberchlamydia. We'd drive but the car was destroyed by radiation from that exploding Ukraine nuclear power plant".
#8
Please Find Alternative Ways To Disappoint Your Father
LinaLovesBooks 3 years ago
It's quite simple, actually. Just disappoint your mother too!
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pink_panda 3 years ago
Yes, pole dancing is a fun and challenging form of fitness, and it's getting more and more popular! I do believe that some people would use random poles to try some moves, but I imagine experienced polers would know better than to test their luck with the poles holding up a tent.
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#9
Men, I Present You The Future
Choco 3 years ago
Sure would love this more if it wasn't directed at one gender and the title didn't make it worse
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Wingo Lamo 3 years ago
To be fair, they should really change it to "we can shoot your spouse".
Bored Retsuko 3 years ago
No, such super hilarious jokes are only funny on the expense of women /s
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MagNat 3 years ago
OK, call me a joyless feminist, but with the prevelance of domestic abuse against mostly women - this is cringe.
Emma 3 years ago
Nope that's not a joyless feminist. That's a feminist who understands what's funny and what's not.
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Marissa Wolff 2 years ago
It's called "dark humour", dipshit. It's actually really funny.
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asexualotl (she/her) 3 years ago
how about "we can shoot your spouse, frame your in-laws"?? no?? we want misogyny?? ugh i guess i don't get the joke here
Emma 3 years ago
So if the genders were switched would this still be funny? Or is it funny only at the expense of women.
LeeBreezy 3 years ago
if they genders were switched, it'd be hilarious. like how this is hilarious.
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Blitzø 3 years ago
I'LL TEACH THOSE F*****S NOT TO MESS WITH I.M.P!! ((in character joke don't downvote please))
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"It's often easier for other people to spot typos as they're more objective and less close to the work than the creator," she noted that creators tend to not see the forest for the trees, and need to take a step back.
She added: "And spend time on your creations—doing things in a rush means you're more likely to make mistakes."
Content creator @Kwintarget has a knack for finding what resonates well with the Twitter crowd. Their recent thread about signs that will “have you rolling on the floor” is no exception: it got over 5k likes.
But more important than any number is how the post made people feel. Never underestimate the power of a chuckle, a giggle, and a smile.
#10
Now They’re Overstepping Cause What The Hell
blobby_grrl 3 years ago (edited)
Hey! Im a tall person with even lower standards, this is my water!
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Jill Hojnacki 3 years ago
Well . . . It was a hot day for us in the Pride parade yesterday. I may or may not have shared my cup of water with a marcher identifying as a Gt. Dane. All I can say is that I finished the cup. It was most refreshing.😇
#11
Oh Word?
glowworm2 3 years ago (edited)
So basically we’re responsible for teaching the rabbits bad habits.
LinaLovesBooks 3 years ago
If I'm being completely honest, humans are responsible for most of the world's bad things.
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LinkTheHylian 3 years ago
Is... is that rabbit wearing a smoking jacket? Because I would like to share a cognac with it.
Anne McKinney 3 years ago
Drop a butt on those pine needles and there won't be any rabbits after the massive fire.
Siss Larsen 3 years ago
Exactly!! Here in Spain, if you get caught causing a fire, trust me the fines are massive
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Kyria Denton 3 years ago
I'm sorry to say it but an orangutan at the zoo learned to smoke cigarettes because of human beings, people would toss them into the exhibit and she would smoke what was left. They redesigned the enclosure to stop her habit.
#12
How To Twerk
Julia Mckinney 3 years ago
"It's just a jump to the left! And a step to the riiiiight. Put your hands on your hips, and your knees in tight!" Bonus points if you can finish the song!
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Karen Klinck Klinck 3 years ago
It has to be the stupidest move I've seen in along time. And the places people choose to do it--!
Load More Replies... Pete from Cali. USA 3 years ago
I like how they wrote it like many of us do: start with nice spacious letters and then make them skinnier as we notice that we're going to run out of space
Whether your sign is meant to be chique, serious, playful, or downright hilarious, it really does matter how you put it together. The font, the colors, the placement of the words and the illustrations—everything matters. And this can make or break the entire message.
Recently, Matt Johnson, a consumer psychology specialist at Hult International Business School and Harvard University explained to Bored Panda how vital legible fonts really are.
“The more fluent a font is written in, the more likable and trustworthy the message. As more brands become familiar with this phenomenon, they may want to test new, more fluently written logos to capitalize on this effect,” the author of ‘Branding that Means Business’ told us about the so-called ‘fluency effect.’ This applies to company logos, ads, as well as everything visual.
#13
Church Signs
Ian Webling 3 years ago
I have an elderly Muslim friend who has lapsed. He tells beggars on the street to go to the mosque on Fridays at lunch time if they want free shoes. They will be left outside and one can just help ones self.
Well-Dressed Wolf 3 years ago
If your comment is true, instead of donating/buying shoes for the beggars, your friend instead encourages them to commit crime and steal other peoples’ shoes?
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Pete from Cali. USA 3 years ago
I'm really not surprised by this; Some of the worst people claim to be religious people.
#14
Church Signs
Bouche Clay 3 years ago
I'm guessing they have a class studying the Biblical prophets.
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Andy Hinds 3 years ago
This sign alone should have a lot of people questioning religious faith.
#15
Reasonable Signs
Eleanor Green 3 years ago
It's a Trap! It's an alien in disguise, looking to get all the world's tacos! :0
Donald Holder 3 years ago
If you've come this far and all you seek is a taco??? Dude don't come next time.
“If companies begin to recognize that consumers, at least in digital environments, prefer more basic logo designs, brands will rush to be the first in their industry to do so to plant their flag first. While all brands want to be at the razor’s edge of consumer preferences, no brand wants to be seen as the copycat of their competitor,” the specialist told Bored Panda.
Meanwhile, Lisa McLendon, the William Allen White Professor of Journalism and Mass Communications and the coordinator of the Bremner Editing Center at the University of Kansas, had some practical advice about designing signs that she shared with Bored Panda during an earlier interview.
#16
Hear Them Out
meow point1 3 years ago
*looks at username* I can see why you'd like that joke.
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Greg Williams 3 years ago
Another reminder on how abhorrent the United States prison system is :/
Well-Dressed Wolf 3 years ago (edited)
It’s a joke sign. Seeing as you’ve commented “x is so funny” with the eye-rolling emoji several times now, I feel like you’re missing the point of a joke sign. I’m pretty sure no one here actually thinks rape is funny, nor does anyone here actually agree with the sign’s sentiment. Additionally, one can avoid the threat of forced heiny-hole enlargement entirely by simply not shoplifting!
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Bobby 3 years ago
Not the biggest issue out there, but this is no longer the case in most US prisons. Between the prison rape elimination act and the increasing number of openly gay, and sometimes extremely willing, men in prison the amount of prison rape is much lower than the average person believes
Tt 3 years ago
I've read they put pedos and other child abusers in separate confinement so the other prisoners don't get to them. That might be a reason why.
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Luna Crow 3 years ago
Also came here to see if even an innocent "b******e," which we all the have, is now a naughty word? Why the censorship overreach?
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AngelWingsYT 3 years ago
The fact ppl immediately think this is a "rape joke" I guess when your in prison you never ever consent to any sex? It nothing but rape there? 🤦♀️ ffs stop being so sensitive over a JOKE
#17
Clear Warning
Ellisdogs 3 years ago
Technically that makes you a survivor which means you will be shot again.
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Kellie Thornton 3 years ago
Mine said "Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be eaten." With a picture of a german shepherd at the bottom
April McLeod 3 years ago
I have this on my gate - anyone surviving the second shot will be put to work under armed guard...
Karen Klinck Klinck 3 years ago
I've always liked this one. Along with, "The hell with the dog. Beware of owner!"
#18
Oh Word?
Karen Klinck Klinck 3 years ago
It's why the cobbler's child goes barefoot.
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Down With Agent Hedgehog! 3 years ago
Ol’ Johnny is about to win the No Bell award
Load More Replies... Daniel Atkins 3 years ago
The repair shop stuff is the last fixed they are out taking care of the customers.
According to the professor, brevity and clarity are absolutely vital when it comes to designing signs. You have to understand that you’re supposed to make an immediate impact on your audience.
"Clarity and brevity are essential. You only have a second or two to get your message across, so you want people to understand quickly with zero confusion," she told us.
#19
Ain't Nobody Got Time For That
Nonna_SoF 3 years ago
The tone here seems to be a bit wrathful with a bit of pride and sloth sprinkled in for good measure.
Betsy Green 3 years ago
I have never thought of it before, but I bet priests really do have to listen to long, dragged out confessions, probably with lots of useless backstory. "Well, you see father, it was two Wednesdays ago, and I was spreading jam on my toast, but not my normal jam........ "
WonderWoman 3 years ago
It is their bloody job. What else are they doing?
Load More Replies... Vera Rios 3 years ago
Really, I will just go straight to the Father and tell Him myself. Get rid of the middleman.
Mistiekim 3 years ago
I don’t get off work until 6pm. What am I supposed to do now??? Carry over my sins until the next day like cellphone minutes?
Mary Peace 3 years ago
As Vera Rios says, go straight to God the Father, cut out the middle man. I'm Christian but not Catholic, so I don't have to 'go to confession', I just talk to God.
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#20
Fair
#21
Church Signs
Nonna_SoF 3 years ago
I mean, there was one print of the Bible that said "thou shalt commit adultery" and if it's perfect it couldn't possibly be corrupted by a printing mistake so...
James Pasquini 3 years ago
But the Commandment is "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife" - so you could have as many wives as you wanted, just don't go looking at your neighbor's lustfully. Pluck thine eyes out!
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"Don’t carve an error in stone. It’s embarrassing and expensive to fix. Proofreading before you produce, whether it’s stone or not, is absolutely necessary," she urged everyone to take the time to check the text for errors. If you feel you might not notice something obvious, ask someone for help, whether they’re a friend or a professional.
#22
Clever
Alexandria Z 3 years ago
I want one for a bumper sticker but sadly, They wouldn't see it. To busy texting *sigh
#23
These Toilet Signs Are Violating
Quitethedilemma 3 years ago
There are many others like it, but this one is mine.
Load More Replies... #24
Stop Cheating
Susan Bosse 3 years ago
Those names and that scenario have all the makings of a country song that practically writes itsel.
Monday 3 years ago (edited)
That really does depend on whether Luann and Vivian both knew he was married though. If I meet a guy in a bar and start a relationship with him, then later find out he's actually married and consequently dump him, then I was not to blame.
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"Choose your font with readability in mind. It should be clear and readable at a distance; you don’t want to make people puzzle through a swirly script," the professor added that the font you use is incredibly important. You can end up confusing a lot of people if you pick something that’s simply not legible quickly enough.
#25
You Heard
Solidhog 3 years ago
I think it means if you kill the spider as it attacks you then cut off it's ability to lay more eggs.
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Mali Holdaway 3 years ago
What does eggs, scissors, exclamation point mean??? . . . We will excitedly cut off ur testicles????
#26
Really?
ohjojo (you/your's) 3 years ago
I think you would have drawn a bigger crowd if it was a naked invisible couple
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Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano 3 years ago (edited)
But if he's wearing shoes, is he technically naked?
Well then 3 years ago
Do an experiment: walk outside in just shoes and see what the police say. Please report back with your findings. 😂
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#27
They Don’t Care
LittleWombat 3 years ago
This gem has been around since I was a teen. Wish I still knew everything oof
Anna Repp 3 years ago
I remember when I was 17 my friend, who was in her early 30s, told me that she used to know everything, too, when she was my age... I'm 45 now and I wish I still knew everything. Well, at least I have a teen kid who does!
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René Studer 3 years ago
Teenagers are flooded with hormones and for the most part lead a sexually unfulfilling life. Let them be moody.
Emma Perkins 3 years ago
Yeah, I'd also be moody if I'd practically just shape shifted (puberty hits like a truck), and then everyone suddenly told me I was an adult with responsibilities and then talked to me like I was a toddler. Maybe 25 isn't old enough to understand the Boomers' hatred of teens
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Ram Lastname 3 years ago
Spot bang on, right on target, nail on the head, exactly, hit the mark, etc etc etc!!
James Pasquini 3 years ago
I can see some parents hanging this sign in every room in the house... and in the car. (Hint, hint!)
So, dear Pandas, which of these signs did you enjoy reading the most? Were there any that really got you laughing so hard you thought it’d never end? Have you ever made a massive mistake in anything you’ve written that had a huge impact on the message? Tell us all about it in the comments.
#28
Now They’re Overstepping Cause What The Hell
Never Stop Learning 3 years ago
Ok, so my supposed to be an adult brain spent the day ruminating over "How does a blind person clean up after their dog?" The real facts of it would be interesting to me, so if anyone can share real life info, I would be appreciative.
MelonCloud 3 years ago
They stay close by their dog, so they feel where the dog "goes". Then they just put their hand (with the poop-bag, goes without saying I hope!) above the area and through the heat can feel where their dog went, et voilà! They can pick up after their dog!
Load More Replies... Michelle C 3 years ago
Preach! It’s a health hazard for any type of excrement to be left out like that!!
Karen Klinck Klinck 3 years ago
It's just sad they have to keep reminding the owners.
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Donald Holder 3 years ago
If my dog is that skilled, why the hell didn't he just s**t in the toilet.
#29
Clear Warning
Kenny Kulbiski 3 years ago
I have questions. Sprinkled or dunked? Third world country or island paradise with beautiful naked heathens?
Miriam Gwynn 3 years ago
I took this picture! Fun to see it in the wild. Greek Orthodox Church for those wondering.
#30
Everyone, I Present To You The Goat Of Typos
Diandra “Mss Didi” Blackthorn 3 years ago
The store has to make it's money back somehow, so...
Francisco Garcia Bustamante 3 years ago
I saw a documentary about this, i wonder if anyone remember it, i think wasnt at Discovery 🤔
Daniel Mattock 3 years ago
I could use my warning to pay for the goods I was trying to steal. Would only really work at Poundland though
#31
A Bum With A Business Plan
Vae 3 years ago (edited)
Bum is the worst thing you can a homeless person. They could be a hobo or a tramp (not insulting, just depends on if they travel but work, the former... or travel but don't work, the latter). In homeless society, a bum doesn't work, or travel. It is calling them something lazy and fights happen over it. (I have first hand experience)
Well then 3 years ago
I probably need to put my glasses on, but if that says $2, I'll be there 3 times a week.
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AngelWingsYT 3 years ago
Even better right? You vent he doesnt have to say anything or be burdened with everyones problems
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#32
You Heard
excuse.you 3 years ago
I’d jump the fence then jump back just to say I’ve been on the other side of the fence and have sandpapered a lions a*s in pork chop panties-wait what?
#33
Participation Sign
Heidi 3 years ago
Yes! So glad I'm not the only one who saw a Weasley twin
Load More Replies... Solidhog 3 years ago
Packed with pedestrians and there is still a cyclist trying to ride through!
Well then 3 years ago
Like the dodos on a crowded beach kicking a soccer ball. And don't even apologize when they hit you with the ball 😤
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Donald Holder 3 years ago
Pretty dumb carrying the evidence and admission that gets you convicted.
#34
Intentions
#35
They Don’t Care
Stephanie Did It 3 years ago
As bad as the gym billboard that says "Aliens will eat the fat ones first"
Upstaged75 3 years ago
I once had a pin that I wore on my jacket - it said "I may be fat, but you're ugly and I can diet". :)
#36
Hear Them Out
Bored Retsuko 3 years ago
And for some reason I cannot fathom, you got a downvote! Here's an upvote
Load More Replies... Deborah Harris 3 years ago
I should have a sign.like this as my house hippos think anyone knocking at the door is for them.
Enby.Minecraft.Bee. 3 years ago
There was a neighbor i used to have that had this on their door.
Stephanee Ansell 3 years ago
Iiiiiiiim pretty sure this quote orginated directly from my mother 🤣🤣
#37
Really?
LinaLovesBooks 3 years ago
It could be a realistic prosthetic. Technology these days has come so far from what it used to be.
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Ansi 3 years ago
THANK YOU ❤️ I was just thinking he looked like some actor, so I was scrolling the comments looking for an helpful angel and here you are. 👍😃
Load More Replies... P.A.B. 3 years ago
Wow, this conversation is so different from the one about the seemingly homeless guy, with a sign, offering a service for the money he’s asking for. This guy is seemingly not homeless and able-bodied, has a sign, and is asking for money, with no return on your dollar, and the best folks can do is gush about how amazing and funny and cute he is. There’s a big social disconnect here people. 😒
#38
What’s Wrong With People?!
UpQuarkDownQuark 3 years ago
“What’s wrong with people?” I’ll tell you what’s wrong. They don’t know a funny sign when they see it.
Tony James 3 years ago
This is a Bad Idea, and here's why. Based on the diagram, this is in NYC. City Squirrels are not known for having a sense of humour: if you hold out your hand like you've got a nut, and make "come here, squirrel" noises, a squirrel will come over to you. When he discovers that you don't have a nut, he'll swear at you in squirrel - imagine every foul, bloodthirsty, ancestry-damning cruse you've ever heard in a mafia movie, and multiply it by 10, and you almost get the level of squirrely swearing. Now imagine what that squirrel will do when he discovers that your switched the nut he hid for a grilled cheese. You'd be sleeping with 1 eye open and looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life. You could be walking through a park in another city, another country, and you'd see the squirrels start to gather. "Hey Vinny? Isn't that the jamoke who ripped off Mario from the old neighbourhood? There's still a bounty on his head, right?" A Very Bad Idea Indeed.
Bored Batgirl 3 years ago
Who doesn't know how to make a grilled cheese? And how high was this person? Lol
Donny Bereznak 3 years ago
This sounds very similar to certain quests I'm an Elder Scrolls game
Kimber Jungwirth 3 years ago
Funny thing is that this is actually an ad for Kit's Underground Wine and Spirits. There's been a whole series of notes from "Doug" https://me.me/i/ive-been-watching-a-lot-of-internet-videos-on-making-17600395
Cara G 3 years ago
There are a few of these that are part of a marketing campaign by the owner of Kit's Underground Wine and Spirits, located downstairs in the 59th St subway station 🤣 "Doug" is a character the owner made up and he writes the flyers in Doug's voice. https://www.dnainfo.com/new-york/20160622/columbus-circle/dnainfo-unmasks-man-whos-been-posting-creepy-fliers-around-town.amp
#39
Now This Is How To Do It
Pirates of Zen Pants 3 years ago
Then you may be dealing with the wage gap. If so, take a coin out
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Donald Holder 3 years ago
If you're a female just put the money in the hat and move along please!
#40
Stop Cheating
Mike Loux 3 years ago
Spelling's on point, tho. They're doing better than the parents of poor MaKeighLuh down the street..
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Z Alexi 3 years ago
Not some "people"...some "cheaters." The victim already had her dignity & respect trashed by the perp [& ppl laughing behind her back]. Let's call him what he is~~a confirmed liar.
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Pizzagirl 91 3 years ago
No comma needed if "cheater" is the name of the signed person, not the addressee...
Load More Replies... #41
Men, I Present You The Future
Bored Retsuko 3 years ago
Ah yes, an antique sign from the 1950s when marrying was not optional, resenting your wife was a social norm, and jokes about how to escape her "prison" were hilarious...
3 Owls In A Coat 3 years ago
Any joke where the punchline is “I hate my wife” always felt a little cringey to me
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Kelly F 3 years ago
When I was an infant I had an asthma attack so bad my mother thought I was going to die. My dad was at the bar and they lied and said he wasn't there.
Emma 3 years ago
Aww yes, the usual misogynist jokes toward women about how horrible we are that men just have to get away. What if the genders were switched would it still be funny?
Monday 3 years ago (edited)
Yes it would still be funny. There's no difference in "pay a buck and I'll lie to your wife" and "pay a buck and I'll lie to your husband". Not liking these jokes is fine, but the absolute outrage they spark is ridiculous.
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Mama Panda 3 years ago
I remember seeing a bar called "He's Not Here" and they would say the bar name when they would answer the phone instead of "hello". Quite funny
Pizzagirl 91 3 years ago
Everyone's all about the way this shows how horrible marriages were "back then" - I'm just wondering if barmen actually EVER knew who their patrons were? Except for in tiny village pubs? Like, I've been out drinking occasionally for over 10 years, and I'm sure no bartender knew my name, nor I theirs - how would they ever know who the caller is talking about?
#42
Oh Word?
Lazy Panda (she/her/hers) 3 years ago
Clever advertisement but that looks way too flimsy to pierce someone's chest.
Raven DeathShade 3 years ago
Excuse me, what if I just want to take a nice walk WITHOUT someone trying to kill me?
Phyllis Turbin 3 years ago
The stakes look like they're nailed down. How do you snap off a stake?
#43
You’d Wonder If People Do Any Of These
Down With Agent Hedgehog! 3 years ago
Run, the Ministry of Magic is coming for you.
Load More Replies... Anonymous 3 years ago (edited)
Okay. If I suddenly find myself sick, I'll just yarp on the information desk. 🤮
Delilah Oster 3 years ago
Everyone: talking about random stuff Me: WhY Is TheRE a CAmeRa IN tHE batHrOom 👁 👄 👁
#44
Men, I Present You The Future
foofoofloofy 3 years ago
Can I come? I'm not anybody's husband. I just want to drink and be looked after :)
JJ(they/them) 3 years ago
I'll look after you free of charge :) (tbh same tho)
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Well-Dressed Wolf 3 years ago
I was what they used to call a “nerd” as a little girl - I hated shopping and used to beg my mom to leave me in the bookstore and come get me when she was done shopping. XD
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mrsmir 3 years ago
How hard is it to put your dirty socks in the laundry basket, am I right?! Lol. The things we do for the people we love 🤣
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Gozer LeGozerian 3 years ago
There's literally one a couple post up. If you don't like it, welcome to the world of sexism, every woman on earth welcomes you
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Mickie Shea 3 years ago
Awesome bar ad. I want to open a bar just so's I can put out this sign.
#45
I Refuse To Believe Any Of These Sounds Right In Their Heads
Timmy Pillinger 3 years ago
Are we in Australia or New Zealand where e is pronounced like an i?
Nunya Bidness 3 years ago
Don't care how big you think your deck looks, but I would like $2.25 per gallon gas.
#46
Now They’re Overstepping Cause What The Hell
Billy Harrelson 3 years ago
Actually Jeff Goldblum saved us from the aliens. Will Smith was just there because he had a fear of flying.
Pirates of Zen Pants 3 years ago
That's nothing. The neighboring shop is staying open in honor of Chris Rock.
#47
Now This Is How To Do It
Nonna_SoF 3 years ago
In this case it's more gullible than generous. Why should I give some rando on the street money I could give to a charity I know will actually do some good?
Tyranamar Seuss 3 years ago
Ohhhh! You're supposed to put MONEY in there. I thought you were just supposed to pop a squat.
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Paul Mitchell 3 years ago
It would be interesting to know if there is a gender difference.... probably not.
Dill 3 years ago
I used to work in fundraising for charities if you really want to know? Yes, there is a difference. One gives more frequently but less in one go, one gives more but less often. You can probably work out which and why.
Load More Replies... #48
How Thoughtful Of Him
Lazy Panda (she/her/hers) 3 years ago
I think the one with the scissors behind their stove is a trap for this kid.
Christina Rosetti 3 years ago
Next year set up a Ring camera, or wait in hiding with your phone camera and catch them in the act!
Load More Replies... Tom Drummer 3 years ago
Anyone expecting a flower thief to count on finding scissors at the flower bed... idk, just doesn't seem to know how the world works.
#49
You’d Wonder If People Do Any Of These
Nunya Bidness 3 years ago
Second on from the bottom is like, hey alligator I fart in you in your general direction
Daniel Atkins 3 years ago
Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time.
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🤣🤣🤣 (Me while reading bp) 3 years ago (edited)
Concerning this has happened enough times a sign is needed. The darwin effect
Sassy Squatch 3 years ago
Everyone appreciates having their a** eaten or getting the occasional bj. Apparently the gators don't appreciate having to do it, so they put up a sign.
Edward Treen 3 years ago
If anyone does any of these things, I imagine it's never more than once.
#50
What’s Wrong With People?!
Lazy Panda (she/her/hers) 3 years ago
I think this one is a trap to catch that flower-stealing kid.
Jessica Blankenship 3 years ago
Naw because this person can actually spell scissors lol
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Moya Satterwhite 3 years ago
Can I bring my cat instead, he moves everything. You supply the Mackarel.
O.M.Miki 3 years ago (edited)
AHHAHA! hanzel and Gretel revisited. " Oh dear small child with such bitty arms might you come in and help an old but not too old man grab his very sharp and long snipper snappers from behind my very hot stove. I've been baking an empty turkey pan for hours so i do apologize for the smell of whats to come . ah yes come along. yes, that's a boy take my hand - I believe I have some extra candy and a warm bed you might snack and nap on with me of course and only after you reach my snipper snappers mind you. Ohh yes we will have such great fun you and I - sharp bed toys and sleepy time tea. I'll eat my roast after . (door closes) I'll even send some to your mum. ;)
P. Mozzani 3 years ago
Anyone who would fall for this could be setting up a child for a sexual predator.
#51
We All Have Our Breaking Points, Don’t We
Gaya Knust 3 years ago
Judging by the ripped piece of paper just below the sign, it's not even the first time someone has complained about that.
#52
Reasonable Signs
Katy McMouse 3 years ago
I snorted waaay too loud with this one. I might have ruptured my esophagus. Anyone know what a ruptured esophagus feels like?
Load More Replies... #53
May We Never Experience A Year Like 2020 Ever Again
UpQuarkDownQuark 3 years ago
I met a woman who said that for six months she had no idea that her coworker, who started there after mask mandates were put in place, had no teeth at all.
Vae 3 years ago
We are still in masks at work, along with eye wear. I don't think healthcare is going to be mask free for quite some time.
Tim Douglass 3 years ago
They've discovered that it significantly reduces all sorts of illness among healthcare workers.
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#54
These Toilet Signs Are Violating
Enigma wrapped in a paradox 3 years ago
If you had to clean up the mess stupid people make, this sign is a nice way of saying what you'd actually be thinking.
SheamusFanFrom1987 3 years ago
Seen one in a cybercafe back in 2018. Yup, still seems like many didn't stand close enough XP
#55
Please Shut The Damn Doors
Deborah Harris 3 years ago
Oh a Manchester phone number no surprise there then for all Arsenal fans 😀
Deborah Harris 3 years ago
Nothing check out the number plate though lol.just noticed it
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#56
May We Never Experience A Year Like 2020 Ever Again
Tessb90 3 years ago
This has kept me safe for many years before covid was a thing. Since Covid, I have just expanded it to include any person who I don't know, or like. Added bonus of wearing a mask so that you are less likely to be recognised by someone.
Load More Replies... #57
They Don’t Care
🤣🤣🤣 (Me while reading bp) 3 years ago
Could explain why senior woofers keeps running away 🤔🤔🤔
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#58
Please Shut The Damn Doors
Viola Yarrow 3 years ago
Someone make this into one of those memes where no one knows what’s happening
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#59
I Refuse To Believe Any Of These Sounds Right In Their Heads
Michelle C 3 years ago
I read this as “Fashion Fart” initially. I’m assuming the owners and staff pass brightly colored or otherwise trendy gas?
#60
Intentions
#61
Please Shut The Damn Doors
Blitzø 3 years ago
What who said? Wait, what B***H is talking S**T about ME? (another reference)
Load More Replies... #62
Stop Cheating
Dane R 3 years ago
I feel like the person who cheated deserves this more than the person who they cheated with
Bella V 3 years ago
If she knew he was married, I would've put them both on blast.
Load More Replies... Dane R 3 years ago
I feel like the person who cheated deserves this not rhe person who they cheated with
Minister, Nnam Gideon 3 years ago
The husband is the problem. He is the one that is under a commitment
Little Phoenix 3 years ago
Than people would also know who she (the wife) is.
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Got Myself 4 Pandas 3 years ago
Blame the married person - they're the one who made a commitment to be with their spouse. Yeah, being with a married person is shitty but they have no obligation to anyone if they're single, they've made no commitment or promises - they're just kinda shitty, the married person is the one to blame here
SewingStaffy 3 years ago
There's 2 people involved. Why just blame her. Husband needs a big banner as well
Okiedokie 3 years ago (edited)
In Florida you can get sued for doing something like this. Defamation. I know this because I’d have put something similar up myself a few years ago but it would have had my ex on it too, not just the person they cheated with. Edit: & no, I’m not giving the person they cheated with any slack either when they were much older, already divorced with 2 grown a$$ kids of their own having cheated on THEIR OWN spouse prior [hence divorced].
#63
Everyone, I Present To You The Goat Of Typos
Silas Nash 3 years ago
That smoke is thick AF, like fog, and you have to feel your way around.
ohjojo (you/your's) 3 years ago
My town has you beat. While trying to promote condom awareness they used the same structure with the circle and the line through it but they put a condom in the middle. Oops
#64
A Trip To The Zoo
Bethan Coleman 3 years ago
Signs like this are common in India outside of Hindu temples because menstruating women are considered impure and must not enter
#65
Okay Mom
Timmy Pillinger 3 years ago (edited)
I used to work in an office where there was a picture of General Kitchener saying "your country needs you... To wash up"
#67
Feels Reasonable
WonderWoman 3 years ago
He is stealing from someone who helped him out. There are no excuses.
Load More Replies... Mali Holdaway 3 years ago
My issue is if this person is employed as a minister/preacher then they should not be collecting SSA disability. I had to fight like he'll to get my benefits. It took over 3 years from application to hearing, the whole time unable to work. There are lots of people who are still fighting for theirs/or were flat out denied so if this person is getting benefits they are not entitled to then I hope the right people see that sign!!!
joop 3 years ago
Maybe he doesn't get paid. Volunteer work. I doubt that when he doesn't pay rent, but most preachers I know work for free.
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Heather 3 years ago
This is wrong. Disability requires you to be poor and it is exceptionally hard to get accepted on. This person isn't living the high life.
Beck 3 years ago
But he still need to play his rent. He is also a preacher. Probably sleeps on a golden mattress every night.
Load More Replies... Upstaged75 3 years ago
Some countries have eviction bans due to the pandemic, so they may not be able to evict him.
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#68
Please Shut The Damn Doors
martin734 3 years ago
Sometimes I would be happy with quantity over quality.
Load More Replies... #69
These Toilet Signs Are Violating
#70
Seen This One In My Hood
Lazy Panda (she/her/hers) 3 years ago
The raccoons and coyotes will check Outlook before attacking visitors.
Brandie Litchfield 3 years ago (edited)
Why isn't the door frame attached to anything at the top? This doesn't look very sturdy
#71
Really?
RandomCitizen 3 years ago
Focus is a homeless charity that helps people with mental health issues.
Deutschland Mädchen 3 years ago
Thank you so much for explaining! I thought it was just a bad ad campaign for some random company.
Load More Replies... #72
What’s Wrong With People?!
enohPilivE 3 years ago
It a photochop...the paper size/color ate the dead giveaways
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#73
Stop Cheating
excuse.you 3 years ago
How do we know this is about cheating? Maybe they ate the last of Andrea’s barbecue pork dumpling because if someone ate my barbecue pork dumpling they will be required to either buy me 1,000,000,0001 packets of barbecue pork dumplings (from woolies specifically) or they need to find a new house. So maybe this person ate Andrea’s barbecue pork dumplings and they’re trying to say sorry by just a sign which will not work for obvious reasons.
#74
You Heard
Red Squirrel 3 years ago
If this sign is for the uneducated and illiterate then they are going to have a hard time understanding this...
Cashme Outside 3 years ago
Im gonna go ahead and say Robert has probably had a few tresspassers.
#75
Reasonable Signs
Dammian 3 years ago
Or, he get pee where he shouldn't and his eggs cut off for FREE!
Load More Replies... 3 years ago
I read it to the tune of that christmas song with a partridge in a pear tree I forget what it's called
._. 3 years ago
"The 12 days of Christmas"? Or "The 12 Pains of Christmas"?
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Brandie Litchfield 3 years ago
Is that a website address in small print? "STILL-HORNY PLEASE HELP" Wait what??? And why is it all in caps like he's yelling? It does seem like it should be in a jingle, a countdown like the Christmas song haha 10 neglected pets, 25 kids and counting, 16 angry wives, tra la la la la la
#76
Clear Warning
Mobey Drunk 3 years ago (edited)
This is a George Carlin joke. It's from his driving skit about yellow signs in the back window. The full part is "I have a sign with "Armed pitbull with AIDS on board, and even the jask offs are leaving me alone ". This also goes into anything can be funny, all you need is an exaggeration. Something that is blown way out of proportion. Remember, don't take jokes too seriously (& many of these have crossed the point to where it could horrible if you took them seriously as well). The only exemption I hold on this is malicious jokes, where it is truly meant to look at someone negatively with harmful intentions.
#77
Intentions
Add New Image
What do you think ?
Izzy Curer 3 years ago (edited)
"Tresspassers will be hogtied and told they have a purdy mouth."
Monday 3 years ago
eh...a compliment is a compliment I guess. Time to trespass!
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Shayne Randlett 3 years ago
I spotted this in Maine last year. Best "No Trespassing" sign ever, IMO 20210921_1...c4c0ce.jpg 
Izzy Curer 3 years ago (edited)
"Tresspassers will be hogtied and told they have a purdy mouth."
Monday 3 years ago
eh...a compliment is a compliment I guess. Time to trespass!
Load More Replies... Shayne Randlett 3 years ago
I spotted this in Maine last year. Best "No Trespassing" sign ever, IMO 20210921_1...c4c0ce.jpg
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