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We’re going to have some pun today, pandas! Oops, I meant fun! We’ve taken a trip to the Wholly Pun Bible on Instagram and gathered some of the most clever (and perhaps eyeroll-inducing) puns that they’ve ever posted down below.

From cringey dad jokes to clever wordplay, we hope you enjoy scrolling through these puns, pandas. Be sure to upvote the ones that you plan on passing along to your fellow pun enthusiasts, and keep reading to find a conversation with John C. Lewis of Punsteria!

#1

Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

pun_bible Report

SadieCat17 (she/her)
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Lmao they are making up b******t. Let me show you guys some real math. The human genome has a little over 3 billion nucleotide pairs with 4 possible pairs (AT, TA, CG, GC). A single sperm cell contains half that, so 1.5 billion pairs. We need two bits to represent 4 variables (00, 01, 10, 11), so one pair is two bits. To encode 1.5 billion pairs, we need 3 billion bits. 3 billion bits is equal to 375 megabytes, not 37.5. Arguably you could compress it to a smaller size, but this isn't compressed data. According to WebMD, an average healthy ejaculation produces 200 million sperm on the lower range (for caution so I don't wildy over estimate the number). 200 million sperm holds 75 BILLION megabytes of data, or 75 thousand terabytes of data. Hell, it's more simply represented by 75 PETABYTES. For once the simplified math meme massively underestimated the number.

SadieCat17 (she/her)
Community Member
1 year ago

This comment has been deleted.

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Sergio Bicerra
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oldschool guys still use a floppy.

Jrog
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It usually gets floppy after the "data transfer".

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Dan Flo
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You cant get as much information from floppy as you can from a hard drive.

Archie Hayden
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are you joking, my pc can only hold 500gb!!! 😡

volcanic_larva3
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

they had us in the second half ngl...

rustythorn
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

some people thing it is a sin to spew pointless information

Glenn Milliken
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not if it's the same data with transcription errors over and over again

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To learn more about the wonderful world of puns, we reached out to an expert on the topic, John C. Lewis of Punsteria, a site dedicated to sharing the world's best puns. John was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda, sharing that he's always had a love for word play.

"[Puns are] part of the internal jokes and culture we grew up with," he shared. "I always use them while having fun with friends and family, especially when it comes to writing congratulation letters, and similar. They are always a perfect choice to add in a bit of fun and originality!"

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    #2

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Rob D
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She was just looking for a reaction.

    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Flint, Michigan ... a shout out to Pb .... /atomic number 82... /atomic weight 207.19... /melting point 327.5 °C (621.5 °F)... /boiling point 1,744 °C (3,171.2 °F)... /density 11.29 gram/cm3 at 20 °C (68 °F)... /oxidation states +2, +4... /electron configuration [Xe]4f145d106s26p2 or 1s22s22p63s23p63d104s24p64d104f145s25p65d106s26p2

    crazydogmama
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She could have just bought the shower curtain with the periodic table on it. Won't wash off, either.

    Paul Gerrard
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Definately no period on the table

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    We also asked the pun expert if he could share some of his favorites with us. "'This coffee is so good, it's bean on my mind all day!' [And] 'I don't trust these stairs because they're always up to something.' These are the ones I like to say in everyday situations, all puns are dear to me," John added with a smile.

    He even says he unintentionally creates puns all the time. "It comes as a random inspiration during talk and daily life - the more you use them, the better you get at it. It becomes almost muscle memory," John explained.

    #3

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

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    Daniel Atkins
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    they are in tune they struck a chord.

    Norah Reilly
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She's definitely a keeper.

    DJisn0ice
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    push it down a hill, it will become a rolling stone.

    Mya Lugar
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think he will just string her along..that's what he's noted for, that and his cleft chin.

    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    as the original meme said, "Marry her faster."

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    "People underestimate the power of humor - even if it's just a corny pun," John added. "It makes you look at life from a more positive side, and makes the world a better place for everyone around you. I have never met a humorous person that's bad, have you?"

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    If you're looking for even more brilliant puns, be sure to visit Punsteria!

    #4

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

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    Hannah Rees
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This gladdens my heart in so many ways

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially if you've been thinking about the Roman empire

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    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    an exhibit of romin' numerals

    Lotekguy
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    IV Guys will liquefy burgers for customers who just had extensive dental work or some other chew-disabling incident.

    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Took me a second 🤣

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    #5

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Aisling Raye
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Back in the early '00s, there was a place near my (then) office called the "pho king noodle house" I'll have to see if I still have a picture of it in my phone.

    Mars
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's also a place in Tacoma just called Pho King :)

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    Cat Dragon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is sofa king funny. (We should use this to slip past those stupid filters)

    Mike Trissel
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Instead of having 'boredpanda.com' on the car, put in "BadPunPolice" in the back window

    Some guy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When the left door is open, it looks like they're just faking.

    Puppy Dancing!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pho King is a name I see that makes me giggle now that I know how to pronounce Pho.

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    While puns often illicit eyerolls and groans from audiences, there are plenty of people out there who can appreciate the beauty of them as well. And if you’re one of those o-pun minded people, you’re going to love the Wholly Pun Bible. This Instagram account has been around since May 2017 and has shared an impressive 5,000 posts.

    And clearly, the page is doing a great job, as it has also amassed a whopping 1.7 million followers. From memes to screenshots of brilliant interactions on social media to photos of puns spotted in real life, this page is a wonderful place for anyone who enjoys word play. Plus, it can help anyone out there who needs to have a joke on hand that they can whip out whenever someone asks!    

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    #6

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or lone star state? Texas. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_of_Texas

    Nat49
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Puerto Rico, see the red stripe under the star?

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    Don Adams
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought the lone star was Texas's Yelp rating

    Austin L
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please for the love of everything that is holy do not tell Texans they have a "Texas Superhero" LOL... unless it's a Game Warden, some heroes help you relocate dangerous animals and find you lost in the woods.

    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    they have chuck norris, thats all they every wanted

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    Mara Was… A Surgeon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hell yeah!!! 🦅🦅🦅🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷🇵🇷

    Bozo B. Clown
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I always figured him as captain Texas, but then again, he would have more than just a stupid shield if he were Texan.

    Natalie Kelsey
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Puerto Rico is part of America, guys

    Demosthenes
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Puerto Rico is definitely an American country, who you are looking for is Captain United States of America

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    We all know that dads are the masters of puns, so Fatherly, knowing their niche, shared an article discussing what makes puns so irresistible. Apparently one of the reasons some of us love them is because they are linked with “mental and mating aptitude,” one 2011 study found.

    “For most of Western history, puns were a sign of high intellect,” John Pollack, author of The Pun Also Rises, told The Atlantic. “They were a tool, and they remain a tool, to pack more meaning into fewer words.” 

    #7

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

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    Warpath81
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    My pie charts shows how much I'm not sharing 100%

    lonely miso
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I made that one lol where did you get it

    TheGoodBoi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You had me at pie

    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sky = Bernie Madoff's take

    Unicornangel
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    oh wow, that is so cool. I didn't notice it at first.

    Theresa Rose
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    #8

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

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    Mohsie Supposie
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Very thoughtful. Thank you!

    Jakoe
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We love a considerate tower.

    Mike Trissel
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Shows that at least some older Italians can still be kind and considerate, even when every muscle hurts just to move!

    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Picture appears to have been Photoshopped. The building shown to the left bears only a passing resemblance to the cathedral actually shown on Google Street View.

    #9

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Fynne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those paws were fast as lightnin

    Robin Roper
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog

    A Jones
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They're even adorable with they fight. ♥

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or just a bunny chiropractor..? 🐰

    Puns are also an interesting form of humor because they utilize both the left and right sides of our brains, research suggests. The left side is the linguistic hemisphere, while the right side works to “reveal the surprise double-meaning” of a pun, Fatherly explains. 

    But apparently, you don’t actually need to have a human brain to create puns. In 2011, scientists from the University of Washington created a program that learned how to add “that’s what she said” to sentences with a 72% success rate. Meaning that, the vast majority of the time, this computer understood when to use Michael Scott’s favorite line.     

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    #10

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Intent also...? 🫥

    Mike Trissel
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can vary day to day, depending on YOUR attitude

    Eva Verde
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Snow and Charming in OUAT

    Susie Sawyer
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Color matters too. I'd run from both.

    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    as do emoji's 👞👟👞👟...🔪🔪🔪♥️ ... 👠👠 👠👠

    #11

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Giraffy Window
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nope. And since the point of school has long been to churn out a fresh workforce, it should reflect this by acknowledging that many employers ask weird questions looking for an un-boxed brain. Kid should have gotten a full mark.

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    Anna Meyers
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mom is a teacher. She would give credit for this.

    Blue Mar
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg, such a boring teacher! That's the best answer ever

    Baseball is Life
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would give them half credit for this answer

    Stephanie Fay
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm glad this young person knows who he is!!!

    K Happy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes! My favorite Queen 👸👑

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    #12

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    Rahul Pawa
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What's the difference between a panda and a sociopath? One eats shoots & leaves; the other eats, shoots & leaves

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    Bryn
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Marry me, you will." Is Yoda proposing.

    TheGoodBoi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Is…wait are you telling me Yoda? Or is that a question? I feel threatened…”

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    Lynda Nesbitt
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Mary" and "Marry" aren't pronounced the same...

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    And according to Charlie Hopper at McSweeney’s, even if you hate puns, there’s an explanation for that too. “A pun sidetracks you. It’s your friend who won’t let you get anything done,” Hopper explains. “It doesn’t know how to further the conversation. It can’t help you figure out anything important. A pun doesn’t bond people together by revealing a shared understanding of life. A pun says nothing about human experience or emotion, at least not on purpose.”

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    #13

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Donald Crocker, Jr.
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm surprised so many officers try writing tickets from those little note pads, they know they aren't legal sized.

    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    until BLM what not to do when DWB

    K Happy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I just peed a little 😹😹😹

    Bry Falcis
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's waiting for you to throw a rock at him because if you do he wins.

    volcanic_larva3
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "you are under arrest for out smarting me"

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He would just said "Smith & Wesson" and won?

    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    counter with spock and use the nerve pinch

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    #14

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    Sindhuja
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Coincidentally, I’m currently reading ‘The Radium Girls’ by Kate Moore. 10/10, would definitely recommend, and have, too.

    Bear Hall
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And she died because radioactivity damaged her bone marrow.

    Colin Matthews
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Radiating kindness intelligence and Alpha particles

    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Sir ... you see right through me"

    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "... men perspire, ladies merely glow."

    PFD
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Well miss, you're glowing like a pig"

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    volcanic_larva3
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    one day the glamour will be too much for her☠️☠️☠️

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    #15

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    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought Gandalf! But yeah! Cool old wizard dudes!

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    Lotekguy
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Keep chanting 404, 404, 404, 404 until the wizard is vaporized.

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    But for those of us who do enjoy a good pun, Shakespearean lecturer Dr. David McInnis says they can often feel like sharing an inside joke. “There's a sense of shared cleverness and intelligence that you get the joke,” McInnis told Pursuit. “Some people understand it and some don’t, so there’s that element of sharing something that’s a bit of a secret in some ways.”

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    #16

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

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    Justme
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How many ships could a ship shipper ship if a ship shipper could ship ships?

    Uncanny
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That’s a ship load of ships.

    Jrog
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Dockwise's Marlin class. Semi-submersible barges regularly used to move around warships, cruise ships, oil platforms and whole buildings. In the photo she is moving inland water barges destined for Holland from China, where they are built for cheap. They are relatively light, and she is not even at full load.

    Lorraine R
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you! I was wondering about those flat-bottomed vessels.

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    Dan Flo
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow, thats a boatload of ships!

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    #17

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    Warpath81
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Puts it on a pedestal caterpillar

    TheGoodBoi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Fine. Could you move this dirt pile please?”

    #18

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    Bols
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But... but why are they from right to left, this bothers me so much :D

    SCamp
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I needed the comments for this one… had no idea

    WFH Forever
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Look at the left book, it is 6 but turned upside down.

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    NetworkMan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The top of these says the menu. I'm more curious as to which restaurant requires an 8-book-long menu.

    Bartlet for World Domination
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These are cookbooks: https://www.marktplaats.nl/v/boeken/kookboeken/m2055644264-menu-spectrum-recepten-encyclopedie-8-delen

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    Just saying
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is it bad that this took me way too long to figure this out?

    Krystal Chranda Lear
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did anyone laugh hysterically after looking at this, as I did, or did you have to turn it around and upside down in your head about…9 times to get it?

    Paul Gerrard
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The first book is not #1. Its just first. Remember star wars

    giku T
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    menu? are they hardcovered menus?

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    Dr. McInnis does acknowledge, however, that many puns are not very enjoyable to hear. “A lot of puns are really terrible,” he told Pursuit. “It’s a bit like the jokes you get in Christmas crackers that are notoriously bad, and part of that is a communal bonding thing, you know. You hear a really bad joke, everyone collectively groans … it’s a bonding exercise.”

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    #19

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    unfilteredCigarette73
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Has the distinct scent of lint fire and roofing tar with just a hint mothball

    Comedy Clumbers
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Does it smell like soda, pizza, and shedded pet hair?

    I heart Boo-BI-es
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha, this one is awesome and I wonder where I can buy it.

    Susan Teter
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would be using this around my house like bug spray

    #20

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    Warpath81
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Have you told this joke a lot? Nein

    Novadoe (She/They)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As a German student, this made me feel so smart lmao.

    tameson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did congratulate myself for getting it.

    Brat hard
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    can somebody explain it ? went right over my head

    martymcmatrix
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wirklich funny and really witzig...🙋🏽

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    #21

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    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't usually like photoshopped stuff, but this is cute and well-done.

    Archie Hayden
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have never been disgraced so much in my life

    Norah Reilly
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where's the bacon?

    Hannah Rees
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone has quite a lot of spare time...

    Surenu
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Veganism just got a whole lot more appealing

    SheamusFanFrom1987
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So I won't need cooking oil and a hot pan any longer? Sweet!!! XP

    Mya Lugar
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought they were panzies, Well, they look eggsra special anyway.

    Paul Pallansch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm glad they used sunny-side-up eggs – decent challenge. Others would just be over-easy.

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    Sometimes, our brains even come up with puns without us even realizing it. Have you ever tried to ask someone if they’d like to meet at a certain time, but you accidentally asked them if they wanted to “eat” because your stomach was growling at the time? These little Freudian slips are one way our minds come up with puns without even consciously trying. 

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    #22

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Amanda Hunter
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was found our for doing this kind of thing once!

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    #23

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    grosse_daus
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Actually the color orange was named after the fruit....

    Warpath81
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Call it a pear, get only one

    Max Fox
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Passionfruit is named for the Passion of Christ. The monk who named it saw the three pistils as the three nails, the five anthers s the head, hands, and legs, and the corona filaments as the Crown of Thorns.

    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Other fruits that live up to their name: Blueberry... Green bean (yeah, believe it or not, that's a fruit... Other fruits that don't: Bananas. They're fairly calm and dull, actually.

    PeachPossum
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I believe the first "egg" plant brought to England produced the small white round fruits, hence "eggs" but that's just my own thoughts on the topic.

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    OpheliaPoe
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mango. Doesn't work unless you throw it at him.

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    #24

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Gen X Feral
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Idk and idc where that is, just someone please take me there. So freaking beautiful

    A Nelson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No one is going to say anything about those clouds?

    Elias James
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know what a sland is, but the iSland is the most expensive and innovative of the lot.

    Mya Lugar
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wouldn't really call that "land", beach!

    TheGoodBoi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wellllllllllll I mean it could be land but with some water on it /J

    English is also a particularly great language for coming up with puns, as there isn’t even a word for “pun” in Italian or French. John Hajek, Professor of Italian Studies and linguist in the University of Melbourne’s School of Languages and Linguistics, says this is because English is full of homonyms and has less complex grammar than many other languages. 

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    “This is a result of all the vocabulary we have inherited from Germanic, and all the vocabulary we’ve borrowed from French and Latin, which means it’s a lot easier to find words that sound the same, but whose meaning is different,” he told Pursuit.

    #25

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Chihuahua Mama
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You just need to be more specific with your questions

    P R
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And the difference between "can" and "may" could come into play here

    Fynne
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait we are seeing this from the sisters side of the text thread. Why would the other sister ask her to send her a screenshot of the text thread from her side when she could’ve just screenshotted it herself? Obviously fake

    #26

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Roan The Demon Kitty
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    the thought that I assume was going through the friends mind was sweet, at least.

    Lotekguy
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or maybe he knows more about someone's plans for your immediate future...

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    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    yet some how implying someone's bed is infested with beg bugs is totally fine

    Susan Teter
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Trust no one...and sleep with one eye open

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    #27

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    April Pickett
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Amazing what a little make-up can do.

    Paul Gerrard
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When bond was found to be weinstein

    Gen X Feral
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    This comment has been deleted.

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    We hope you’re having a great time scrolling through these puns, pandas! Perhaps by the end of this list, you’ll have the qualifications to become a pun pundit! Keep upvoting the pics that you can’t help but laugh at, and then if you’re interested in reading even more clever puns, you can find our last article featuring the Wholly Pun Bible right here!

    #28

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it was Bering's, you would not be able to keep a Strait face?

    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    French street signs are very negative. Rue this, Rue that...

    Dodo (they/them)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Any older folk here remember the old computer game Robocod/James Pond?

    Hi
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now I have the Toy Dolls song stuck in my head.

    Tee Pussi
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    #29

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Apatheist Account2
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    On my Sainsbury's receipt, the baby carrots are from Austin Powers - it says "Carrots, baby"!

    shanila.pheonix_
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Name's Pheonix. Shanila Pheonix. And you are..?

    DJisn0ice
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Rai. Thats it, my oc doesnt have a last name :P

    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Short, Shortcake ... Whip, Whipcream

    Cuppa tea?
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That famous joke: Bond:I'm agent Random woman's at bar: secret agent? Bond: no, bloody Oriflame.

    Austin L
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Except it's a berry of lies.

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    #30

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    Zaphod
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What... is your favourite colour?

    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    30 minutes if alone, if there were other people on the bridge i would factor in some addition time to shake the bridge

    Mayhem
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good grief, why is this rickety bridge 2 miles long?

    Cursed Starscream
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    5000 bucks and the entire stock of the transformers section of a toy aisle

    Verfin22
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    About 20 minutes to never.

    Surenu
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Given the state of the bridge, there was very little traffic anticipated, so whatever is on the other side can't be worth crossing this bridge.

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    #31

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    #32

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    54 s
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🎶The world was never meant for one as beautiful as you🎶

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    P R
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There is a 2017 movie "Loving Vincent" in which it is shown there is evidence (analyzed in modern times) that Van Gogh was murdered, that his death was not a suicide. Having worked in forensic sciences, I found it very credible. Evidence, and what was accepted as sound testimony in the days of his death, was not very reliable.

    BlitheSpirit
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have heard that theory as well - that he had mentioned in a letter to his brother that he was being harassed by delinquents; he sent the letter 2 days before the gunshot.

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    S. E. in Indiana
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Speak up, having a hard time hearing you.

    Tigger O
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Evidence says Vincent lost his lobe. So he wasn't too hot to handle, after all.

    Krystal Chranda Lear
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a goh at it, but I just couldn’t cut through the symbolism!

    DeathCabForLola
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can you please speak up I can’t hear you.

    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good god that dark, hilarious, but dark. :,)

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    #33

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    TheGoodBoi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Naughty printer

    Dane
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Michael Jackson's preferred pronouns - he/he

    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It identifies as theytheythey

    #34

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Canny on, canny on as if nothing really matters"

    Will
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Makes me thirsty, time for a Fandango...

    Paul Gerrard
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But it could be caught in a landside. No escape from reality.

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    #35

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    Hi
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now I want fish and chips.

    Terry Rex
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's a good one. And I don't know what they taste like I don't like anything fishy

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The haddock's had it, this is no place for the plaice, sorry cod not think of any more.

    Will
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want stock in this company.

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These people are a lot of other peoples spirit animal.

    mewhomustnotbenamed
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    u just ruined mine, these BPs and a bunch of people passing by's childhood

    #36

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never scan unknown QR codes...

    Maximiliano McCallum
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We're no strangers to love You know the rules and so do I (do I) A full commitment's what I'm thinking of You wouldn't get this from any other guy I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it (say it) Inside, we both know what's been going on (going on) We know the game and we're gonna play it And if you ask me how I'm feeling Don't tell me you're too blind to see Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you We've kn

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    #37

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

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    S. E. in Indiana
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm touched by such a MOOOOOOOving experience.

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You're udderly milking this for all it's worth. No bull.

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    Lotekguy
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never seen this sort of scenario, but I've herd about them.

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They get stuck on the bridge because their horns don't work.

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    TheGoodBoi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wonder how steep the incline up to the bridge is. Their calves must be burning…

    Cristi nah
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why did the cows cross the road? (no... It was a chicken... No?)

    Puppy Dancing!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope the bridge was designed for that weight or it is coming down soon.

    PrettyJoyBird
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WhyHow did the cows cross the road?

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    #38

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    pun_bible Report

    S. E. in Indiana
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's ok, you don't need a lot of room. Just somewhere to keep your keys.

    Elias James
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hard to find your keys among so many.

    Mohsie Supposie
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The space is INSIDE, not outside! Duh!

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No space? But it's for the mail delivery, to carry letters.

    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    on account of being delete-full

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    #39

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    pun_bible Report

    Wesley Frei
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Here’s your unhappy meal, comes with a pair of toy scissors.

    TheGoodBoi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I also ordered a large McWhiskey…

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    me McG
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Golem Arches ... "I'm slubbing it"

    Paul Gerrard
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tasteless and not great to see. Slightly fattening with hair. Yep that's mcdonalds

    #40

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    David
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I touch type so likely wouldn't notice. In fact I just did notice that my N key is mostly worn off and looks like a comma.

    Adam Belaire
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How many other people looked down at their keyboard to confirm if the M and N were switched in the picture?

    UpQuarkDownQuark (he/him)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My best office prank ever: attach a second wireless mouse to a coworker’s (or loved one’s!) computer that you can see from your desk. The trick is to be subtle! Only move the second mouse while they’re moving theirs, and slowly, ever so slowly, move it in one direction. Madness guaranteed to follow.

    v
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It would definitely weed out those who look to type.

    unfilteredCigarette73
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have a friend who can type perfectly when blindfolded so this wouldn't mess with her, but ne? I would mot stamd a chamce

    Timbob
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wouldn’t make any difference for a well trained typist!

    Mara Was… A Surgeon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How could you! Absolutely preposterous...dom't act like such am aminal!

    Stymied Egan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How many checked to see where the m and n were on the keyboard.

    Chris Moffat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you touch type this will make no difference.

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    #41

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    martymcmatrix
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Weird Al or weird AI? It's kinda important because a capital »I« can easily be mistaken for a lowercase »l«...🤷🏽

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    Roan The Demon Kitty
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i mean technically its just a car version of those bendy buses. :D

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Except that they bend round corners, rather than up and down.

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    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    converted an old honda to electric now it is a honda with a cord

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Very good, you're firing on all cylinders!

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    I heart Boo-BI-es
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But this is funny, not dumb. 😆

    #42

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Josephine
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    D*ck is slightly old fashioned, but still a very common first name in the Netherlands. The combination with Chopp AND his proffession is quite unfortunate though

    Wonky
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Next they're gonna censor "Richard" 😒

    S. E. in Indiana
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    Good old Dr. D I C K. He's the small head surgeon there.

    the sixthgirl
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There is also a urologist called Dr. Richard Tapper in Toledo, Ohio.

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's named after his father, a rabbi.

    Mike Trissel
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Knocked at a door once. Mailbox said: I. M. Here ....... they weren't

    Imagineer
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What snowflake freaks out over a Richard's nickname? The world is totally bonkers.

    Ylime
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No. BP is bonkers. They censor everything.

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    cj be like
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hahah, love these roses are red ones.

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    #43

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    Cerise Hood
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    BUT YOU DIDN"T HAVE TO CUT ME OFF

    Zaphod
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That song always reminded me of old Peter Gabriel.

    Stephanie Fay
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That Gotye album, Making Mirrors is SO GOOD.

    v
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one would have been so much better without the picture of Gotye to lead to the reference.

    Michael None
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    What a terrible song. Derivative and boring.

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    #44

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    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    since the faster you go the more time slows down, the way to speed things up is to be absolutely still. or you could ask the other person to run around really fast to slow down time for them.

    Stephanie Fay
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like when Arnold Schwarzenegger said, "Sleep faster."

    Mrs Wuschwusch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Made me laugh so hard, actually I'm still laughing😂

    #45

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

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    Giraffy Window
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    Adoptenheimer

    Analyn Lahr
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait, even your spouse, who allegedly has a key, has to knock? Unless you're talking about ex-spouses? But why would you want them to visit?

    #46

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

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    #47

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    panther
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The airline must have expedited finding their luggage.

    #48

    Funny-Pun-Bible-Memes

    pun_bible Report

    Gen X Feral
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And that's why the gods invented birth control and cell phone cases.

    Jeffrey Diehl
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How much are you willing to pay to have him taken away?

    Bored
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bought it last week, but it's already 12 years old? Seems like iPhones don't age well

    Duncan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why would they use a glass back?

    Annymoose
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because it's super expensive to replace and people keep buying iPhones

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    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/nokia/images/a/a6/Nokia_1110.jpg/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/2000?cb=20100124155749

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    #49

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    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    given the 70% off, it sounds like tease and denial

    David
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Could be frustrating. Logo looks like just part of the tip. Might have to be into edging.

    Stephanie Fay
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    omg I never noticed that about the logo. Well, never thought of it like that that is.

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    #50

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    mewhomustnotbenamed
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    lol that's not what a therapist is supposed to do tho ; make u feel worse, so just don't do that

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But that's why it's a joke! Therapist is gonna make you feel better (unless they're rubbish).

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    #52

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    #56

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    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    good old albuquerque, sometimes helpful

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope the sign isn't repeated on the back, pointing that way.

    #57

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    General Anaesthesia
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pick-up line or threat with extreme prejudice?

    Fynne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The difference between “taking her out” and “taking her out”

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    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And he, in turn, is their appendix because they can all live without him.

    #58

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    #59

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    Atero
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, but they will cost you dearly.

    Zaphod
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wish that I checked my oil more often.

    #60

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    I heart Boo-BI-es
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Iron man? Curious if this was supposed to be abbreviations for females and men? Fe Ma or Wo Me?

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fe2+ or Fe3+. Mn I don't remember any about..

    #61

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    #63

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    Pedantic Panda
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And now his body is at rest, it will remain at rest...

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    His inventing Calculus didn't help him impress women. All his pick-up lines seemed so derivative.

    Penguin Panda Pop
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People know that Isaac Newton was gay, right?

    RedMarbles
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How they can know something he never addressed himself? (Not my downvote)

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    #64

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    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bananabiologist and spacebiologist?

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What about a baby doctor? They have to recruit them very young!

    Puppy Dancing!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I 've been all 3 at the same time since molecular cloning requires microbes.

    #65

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    Angi
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I laughed and I have 3 friends

    I heart Boo-BI-es
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😂 I have 2 friends, called H and 1 called O.

    DJisn0ice
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I get it, and I have more friends than my brain allows me to. This is what being an extrovert and introvert at the same time does for you.

    Novadoe (She/They)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I laughed and I'm pretty sure my friends are my friends xD

    #66

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    #67

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    TiNaBoNiNa
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Joe MaMa is dead. https://everloved.com/life-of/joe-y-mama/obituary/

    #68

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    BlueBlazer999
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    User error so bad the entire system crashed… impressive!

    #69

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    Elisabeth Rose
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mother was walking down the road when she was brutally attacked and is now in a coma with a 1% survival rate and the rest of my family got into a brutal car wreck so bad I almost couldn’t identify the bodies 🥰🥰🥰

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    Jakoe
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's sweet though🥰🥰🥰

    Fynne
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    #70

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    Geoffrey Scott
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I bought some dehydrated water..but I didn't know what to add" Steven Wright

    Daria
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    With regular water these socks do take ages to dry

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    #71

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    David
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reverse this. Show how you get cow's milk only using the same process as for almond milk and you have a horror show.

    #72

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    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But stick a pea under the mattress and all hell breaks out.

    Dawn Marie
    Community Member
    Premium
    10 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    but a knife under the mattress cut the pain in two!!

    #74

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    Cerise Hood
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate donating blood, they always ask me questions like, "who's blood is this", and "where did you get it?"

    TotallyNOTAFox
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And "You can't bring that here in a 5 litre bucket"

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    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They should have read it when it was up there.. edit: also so tiny tapes!

    Zaphod
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The last time I gave blood, they were celebrating a guy who had given 80 gallons.

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    #78

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    DE Ray
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why do riot police always get to work early? To beat the crowd.

    I heart Boo-BI-es
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When did Polo become an extreme, contact sport?

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    #79

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    rustythorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    since these are all the same person from multi realities it would be 3/3

    #80

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    S. E. in Indiana
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He always considered himself to be the greater one of the bunch.

    DJisn0ice
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Could be grater, buts its shredded my humor

    #81

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    Fynne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This feels like it could be a redbull ad

    TiNaBoNiNa
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Red Bull gives you wings” has been the energy drink’s slogan for nearly two decades. Now the company has agreed to pay out more than $13 million after settling a US class action lawsuit that accused Red Bull of making false and misleading advertising claims." https://www.businessinsider.com/red-bull-settles-false-advertising-lawsuit-for-13-million-2014-10

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    #83

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    #84

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    Colt Winkler
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    nobody comment thier names there are hackers and stuff out ther

    Fynne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nobody would do that, and that’s not how hacking works

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    EzDawg
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    your age is your mom's credit card number

    #85

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    BoredPossum
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not very fun for the ones who understand Dutch.

    K.K.J
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh god I'm 41 and still laughed out loud at notities. lol

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Notities. That's me excluded then

    #86

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    gijeff58
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Better pick up line than the other, longer one! (see above)

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    #87

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    Wingsofwrath
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah, he went to the Cave Johnson school of design.

    SCP 049
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why? It's a pun on lemonade and grenade

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    #88

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    MushroomHead22
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    add hot fudge (maybe some melty peanut butter) and you got yourself one delicious snack.

    #89

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    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Instructions clear, did what was asked for...

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Photo repeated from earlier. Boring.

    Khavrinen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Technically correct. The best kind of correct."

    Surenu
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Kid's gonna be a programmer for sure. They definitely got the mindset.

    #90

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    WindySwede
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Beeimg colourblind helps with the not seeing red part.. 😅

    Adrian
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's not the color, it's the motion that agitates them.

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    #91

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    TheGoodBoi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The cake does look yum…or whatever it is

    S. E. in Indiana
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone needs to learn how to spell. Poor kid doesn't have a chance.

    CrunChewy McSandybutt
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's from a funny video. Here's the link: https://youtu.be/EShUeudtaFg?si=vdg-RAomQ4ogDC55

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    #93

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    #94

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    Surenu
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Oh, you play bass? Electric or acoustic?" "Smallmouth."

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    bass with a bass, bass with a bass

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