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You know what's worse than telling a joke and hearing the crickets chirp afterward? The moment, when you thought, that someone else was struck by a case of misinterpretation of a joke, was utterly wrong or knew nothing, only to find out, that all this time it was you who was a captain obvious. For these funny people, whose unfortunate stories we have compiled below, it happened in such a hard way that the funny jokes they have missed turned even better after. Let it be proper condolence if it ever has happened to you, too.

From simply missing a classic short joke to firmly believing that somewhere in the world babies do get boiled during a religious feast instead of being submerged into holy water. From blowing best puns to misquoting famous people, these slightly dim-witted folks surely bit nails after posting their comments wanting to appear smarter than they are.

Some of these people need a bit of training in their sense of humor department, while others will need to learn not to jump too high. Nevertheless, it's kind of impossible to go through the hilarious entries without cringing. Scroll down to check out the good jokes before I spoil too much!

#1

Missed Jokes

Detroitman125 Report

Tobias Meiner
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If anything, the person who responded last did get the joke and seamlessly turned it on the opponent. Sometimes it pays to have a point ready.

若韵 雷
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I see how this is relevant to the article but... Isn't this just really mean?

Fred Burrows
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ha hahahahahaha ha he he hee ho ho ohhh

Maria Campbell
Community Member
7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh gawd! I cried tears of pure lunatical hysteria!

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    #2

    Missed Jokes

    Lucymarvell444 Report

    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I cannot ever see or hear the name Frankunsteen without seeing Gene Wilder and Marty Feldman in my head.

    Kiss Army
    Community Member
    Premium
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can't hear "Putting on the Ritz" anymore without distorting it in my head.

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    Iván Galarraga
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Igor: Dr. Frankenstein… Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: “Fronkensteen.” Igor: You’re putting me on. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No, it’s pronounced “Fronkensteen.” Igor: Do you also say “Froderick”? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: No. . .”Frederick.” Igor: Well, why isn’t it “Froderick Fronkensteen”? Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: It isn’t; it’s “Frederick Fronkensteen.” Igor: I see. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: You must be Igor. [pronounces it ee-gor] Igor: No, it’s pronounced “I-gor”. Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: But they told me it was “ee-gor.” Igor: Well, they were wrong then, weren’t they?

    Sori
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    THIS IS THE BEST THREAD EVER!

    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it could go on forever - seen this film at least 10 times and now going to watch it again

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    Aaron Kara
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Some people dont know when to stop and think XD

    ispeak catanese
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The quotes! You guys are the best! @La Petite - thanks for Frau truvia!

    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mel Brooks was married to Anne Bancroft who played Mrs Robinson opposite Dustin Hoffman in The Graduate

    Sabine Weyermann
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And that's a funny jokes, actually. :)

    Ellis
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ...do you feel the burn already?

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    #3

    Missed Jokes

    hlaiie Report

    Ryo Bakura
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That one went over their head, through the stratosphere, broke orbit, shot out of our solar system, left our galaxy, and hurtled towards the loneliness at the edge of the Universe. At least, that's what my 4 y/o niece said.

    Tony Moon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh look! There goes the space shuttle it went over so high....

    Meowton Mewsk
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lmao! Those obnoxious posts are a staple on BP

    Kevin Moore
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://www.pinterest.com/pin/348184614922086670/

    Crep 105
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is whooshier than the whooshiest whoosh that ever whooshed.

    Uche E
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's funny because he wanted to say "a wide vocabulary" 😁

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    #4

    Missed Jokes

    ohjeepersno Report

    Learyc L Cope
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    you know, if you say your name and then say "welcome to the joke" like you hade said, it's like you are a producer or something, I can hear it now. "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WELCOME TO THE JOKE, A PLACE WHERE WE MAKE JOKES, BUT PEOPLE DON'T UNDERSTAND SOMETIMES." I think i am a dork

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    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am always Oh so negative

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    #5

    Missed Jokes

    VictorVrine Report

    WhiteFox
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    but hey. it really is an 'inside' joke. either that or theres just more to it than what meets the eye. ;)

    Mr Red
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did you just reinvent the same pun again? You could be on here!

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    Misterscooter
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It *IS* and inside joke. Love it.

    Carlota Ocón
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It kind of is an inside joke as one doll is INSIDE another.............. sorry

    T Rex King
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have no idea who is Wooooooshing who

    Tony Moon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Its a pun in a pun in a pun!

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    #6

    Missed Jokes

    ambeloe Report

    Tanksear Industries
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A joke about a joke going over someone's head goes over someone's head... jokeception

    Perilous Not
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honestly this one is too perfect. It could have been faked.

    Crep 105
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So smart, you didn't understand the joke.

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    #7

    Missed Jokes

    geogeo3 Report

    Ladies and Gentlemen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How can people not understand that its a joke?

    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha - - this probably is a believable scenario in som parts of the US

    Liesa Yopp
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm a terrible person I laughed so hard at this.

    Gerry Higgins
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh lord, that one's so dense light bends around him !

    Kjorn
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    you can't makes jokes today. it's a sad time. offended people lead the world

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Kids: Are you our new Mommy? Lol

    Aaron Kara
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah reactionaries, they literally dont know what they get themselves into

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    #8

    Missed Jokes

    rayyanmerchant Report

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That guy must be *humour blind*

    Daniel Funakoshi
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Whooosh over me. Or it's just not good enough.

    Pearl D
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    he meant blue and put the color orange I guess

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    Adi B.
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    nope, his color blind and he wanted the color to be blue like "came out of the blue" but he's color blind so he saw the orange as blue XD

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    #9

    Missed Jokes

    Slashson Report

    Randy Dhuyvetter
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You really should read this with a Sean Connery accent

    CV
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I logged in to give this comment a up vote :)

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    Sel Bonda
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "facepalm" bwahaha... really nothing to respond except hitting head against a mud wall!

    Rebecah Ozuna
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When imbeciles try SO hard to correct, they won't see a joke.

    Keuthonymos
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not sure why they blacked out NerdyNinjaGrrl's name so badly.... Whoops.

    Ric Kolseth
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Funnier with a picture of Ramirez

    Yury Sidorov
    Community Member
    7 years ago

    that guy might have just replied with a response out of pun context to see how many people would get triggered.

    Tanksear Industries
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The grammar nazi gets defeated once more... Victory for the joking class!

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    #10

    Missed Jokes

    saddam_dutchbag Report

    Daria B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    WE ARE! AH-ALL - of waaaaaaalking aboooortions! ♬♪ (sorry, I had to)

    Liesa Yopp
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I adore the second persons reply to it <3 This is a great thread.

    Rhonda
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The dumbing down of America is now complete...

    Alexandru Bucur
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I like the refinement of adding such an obvious stock photo to the post and yet it sailed right over peoples' heads...

    Hemrich Gundesalf
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Actually, I am more annoyed by the lack of punctuation than by the context. Still funny, thus.

    Kevin Moore
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ladies and gentleman skinny and scout I'll tell you a tale I know nothing about The admission is free so pay at the door Now pull out a chair and sit on the floor On one bright day in the middle of the night Two dead boys got up to fight Back to back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other The blind man came to see fair play The mute man came to shout hooray The deaf policeman heard the noise And came to stop those two dead boys He lived on the corner in the middle of the block In a two story house on a vacant lot A man with no legs came walking by And kicked the lawman in his thigh He crashed through a wall without making a sound Into a dry creek bed and suddenly drowned A long black hearse came to cart him away But he ran for his life and is still gone today I watched from the corner of the table The only eyewitness to facts of my fable If you doubt my lies are true Just ask the blind man, he saw it too

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    #11

    Missed Jokes

    Davithofglencracken Report

    chi-wei shen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Lincoln quotes on the internet are fakes because there was no internet back then." - John F. Kennedy

    S.
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I find comments on BoredPanda to be the best there ever could be!" — George Washington.

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    Daria B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't you know he was a time traveller?

    Ladies and Gentlemen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yup, just saw him couple of weeks in front of his Memorial sipping coke and eating bacon!

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    Siddharth Rath
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I didn't say half of the s**t they say I said." -Albert Einstein

    Wyndmere
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How do you know that for sure? Were you there?

    GoldenAngels
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait wHAT?? They DIDNT HAVE THE INTERNET??? Bro you're messing with me

    stellermatt
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    phew... I'm glad that's explained...

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    #12

    Missed Jokes

    kaicat5 Report

    chi-wei shen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would like to know more about the evidence for the existence of a third bone.

    Sally Appleton
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    His knowledge of the scientific method and ability to use it correctly clearly suggest an education level higher than 4th grade!

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Astrophysicist, eh? I wonder if he knows Neil deGrasse Tyson? download-5...a90ac.jpeg download-5b97b12aa90ac.jpeg

    Romyna Davey
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The moment the comments on this are also worthy of a mention in this list. :D

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope he doesn't break that third bone.

    Crep 105
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love how this anonymous person is trying to lecture an astrophysicist about bones.

    Crep 105
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imagine trying to call an astrophysicist uneducated lmao

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    #13

    Missed Jokes

    edgywineglass Report

    Night Owl
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So many people who didn't get it *headdesk*

    Zenozenobee
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When you said earlier that you "got the feeling comedy is either dying or already dead", I was about to tell you that it was pessimist, because the idiots stand out in a crowd, that they are just more noticeable... Ok, I was wrong. There is a whole world of idiots. But the good news, is that Ladies and Gentlemen is not even close de "run out of stupids" ;p

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    Emma B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I got this the first time a looked at it, no hesitation. I feel so smrt!

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    @RJ: TY. I got downvotes on that one because I was making a joke about the dumb Texas comment above. That just went over their heads. Whoosh!

    Gabby M
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Palm to forhead...laments the state of our education system.

    Diane Diggs
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The data is from "something something". That's what convinced me!! lol!

    Tanksear Industries
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I like how this is the only one so far where no people commenting get the joke

    Little letitia
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh wow! That is a large number of clueless people on one post!!

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, like you. Look at all your downvotes on this post.

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    #14

    Missed Jokes

    luciangh Report

    Vicky Zar
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well... maybe he is too young to know what that really is?

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have some ocean front property in Arizona for sale. 😂

    Jewels737
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was younger I was single & I had a guy who was a booty call & I was also unfortunately still into my ex at that time. My b.c. gave me a hicky and the next day I went to spend time with my ex. It was in a perfect location to be a burn from my curling iron. So...I tapped my hot iron on it a few times to make it look acceptable lol.

    Chelle Jones
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Trust me when I say she is soon to be your ex ..

    Don Flynn
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow just how incredibly gullible can someone be?

    Dian Ella Lillie
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's a part of me that wishes that this was a double-miss, and that the OP was suckered too... ;-)

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    #15

    Missed Jokes

    Jmaster_888 Report

    Daria B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At least, this person realised the joke. Give them credit.

    Night Owl
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, they realized their mistake on their own and admitted to it instead of deleting it. Definitely deserves some credit.

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    WhiteFox
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    hey at least he realised the mistake tho

    Ellis
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Perfect car for a bank robbery: fast and no one is able to see it!

    Ande H
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love the comment though Where’s the car- I say that all the time bc my sister has a lot of camp stuff so I purposely sit on her then ask where she is

    Tony Moon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank God one person as redeemed him/her self.

    Markus McCloud
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Okay, this might just be me, but the picture of this car reminds me so much of the DA-SR 12 from Faster Than Light. Am I the only one seeing this? stealth_2_...7e33ac.png stealth_2_base-5bc2b207e33ac.png

    Red
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i still can't see it.

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    #16

    Missed Jokes

    OrigamiKing938 Report

    CbusResident
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And as I always wonder, since they've had so many Ted Talks when will there be a Ted Listens?

    Tony Moon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What about a TedHears and TedDoesSomething...

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    S Bagci
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Stupid TED always skipping meetings.

    Dawn Murphy
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, he goes by Theodore now so....

    Wiggity
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    TODD Talks are pretty good, too. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvtp-dKfbco

    Ruellen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I get the joke, but I have no idea what TED talks is. Never heard of that. Is that a show ?

    Little letitia
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    TED talks are informative/engaging speeches and presentations given in the form of short seminars to a large audience.TED (Technology, Entertainment, Design) is a media organization which posts talks online for free distribution, under the slogan "ideas worth spreading". Talks are limited to a maximum length of 18 minutes but may be on any topic. Here's the TEDx website's explanation of selection criteria: "TED looks for engaging, charismatic speakers whose talks expose new ideas that are supported by concrete evidence and are relevant to a broad, international audience." best one I've seen is James Veitch: replying to spam emails. Honestly it always has me in tears definitely worth a watch! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QdPW8JrYzQ

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    Eduard Peshtmaljyan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The problem with stray-suh-nur's comment is the lack of education.

    Michael awdry
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Also, the guy who doesn’t get it has the illuminati symbol. Conclusion: they’re old.

    Philippe Vermeulen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Look at the illuminati trying to keep us in the mainstream path of thinking

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    #17

    Missed Jokes

    oiracam Report

    Aaron Kara
    Community Member
    7 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No way!!! This person's humour must have been removed by an evil wizard or something!

    Aaron Kara
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This person's *humour* must have been removed...I messed up

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    Zenozenobee
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's the danger when you feel so intellectually superior, that you allow yourself to be rude and boastful.

    Lidee Moril
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone needs to watch Yo! MTV Violins more often

    stellermatt
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    maybe they're a mouse, mice need to live somewhere ya know.

    Johnny Frostbite
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm hoping that the commenter was also trying to make a joke

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is this guy a complete idiot? And a rude one at that.

    Alyse
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it's hilarious because they tried so hard to be condescending

    Jessica Hepler
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honestly this makes me wish I could live in a giant violin

    Happiness is Hippo
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That rap music has a lot to answer for.

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    #18

    Missed Jokes

    glenttastic Report

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nip it in the bud. Swipe left.

    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, now you know! Humor is not their strong suit!

    KT Trondsen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    wow...funny but at the end he turned out to be a jerk

    Chris Bodragon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, she turned out to be stupid. I'd have said the same thing.

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    Magdalina777
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Doesn't sound like she's the stupid one there...

    Chris Bodragon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You do realise that your comment makes you equally stupid?

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    Kjorn
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    not the sharpest knife in the box

    Michalina Piotrowska
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hahaha can't believe people can be so stupid :D

    Ntosh
    Community Member
    7 years ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    Myron Thiang
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well at least he dodged a bullet

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    #19

    Missed Jokes

    _destory Report

    stellermatt
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    comedy, they're trying to prove comedy.

    Night Owl
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Going through this list I got the feeling comedy is either dying or already dead

    Load More Replies...
    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, I've learned something: I didn't know about Jamaica and Belize! You can learn even from jokes! :)

    Jenn Stilger
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I find it weird about Jamaica because when I went there for my honeymoon they said they gained their independence in the 70's

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    Ellis
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Isn't it obvious? They're proving that cloning human beings already exists and has been around for almost a century!

    Tanksear Industries
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why??? Are??? You??? Using??? Question Marks??? for??? Every??? Word??? you??? a*****e???

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lmao. Now I'm thinking of William Shatner.

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    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's not a "f*cking person", that's the Queen. Show some respect!

    Lidee Moril
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why? Because it’s a queen? She’s a human being that like all of us need to leave a fart or poo once in a while. I show respect for people that deserve my respect. I don’t know her, and she knows nothing about me. So no reason to show so-called ‘respect’

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    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago

    This comment has been deleted.

    H. Roon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hahahahahaha~snort~!!! Now THIS ONE IS HILARIOUS!!!!!

    Kiki
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it would get Trump out of office and get people the healthcare they need, I'd welcome her back as Queen of the U.S.

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    #20

    Missed Jokes

    kickingshoes Report

    Ladies and Gentlemen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is one really sad bread, please stop cutting it!

    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    need to butter it up a bit

    Valereee
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd be afraid to eat...all I see is a skull!

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A few things to remember: The French start every day with pain. No matter how nice your children are, German ones are kinder. The Spanish always leave when they see a sale. All Italian boys are bimbos. The Swedes have sex every morning and every evening. Many Poles use preservatives in the bedroom.

    Django Stewart
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's a brand of crackers called "Le pain de fleurs", meaning The bread of flowers, but it looks like the pain of flowers.

    Ryo Bakura
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you don't get bread jokes, you need to use your loaf.

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    #21

    Missed Jokes

    dethmstr Report

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the Irish pubs adopted this policy, they would do just fine, since half the people in the U.S. claim to be Irish.

    Mont
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Most white people in America are either of Irish or English decent.

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    Ivana
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Greeks actually love it when you join in their culture. A lot of cultures actually make it a goal to export part of their culture, like how Western states tried by threat of death to export liberalism. Japan and Korea are more than happy to export their pop culture because economically it is great for them. K-pop, manga, anime, and even societal standards. The culture that exports the best typically has the most control as their ideas and values become standard, therefore, profitable. It is called imperialism and it is highly desirable for many nations.

    Jadon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And added note about the other Asian culture, there's a video and multiple articles about how the Chinese don't mind when foreigners wear qipao and the like as well, I'm sure this convo stems from how people were attacking that poor girl from wearing a Chinese dress.

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    Crouching_Penn_Hidden_Teller@yahoo.com
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know this is a joke but there are people who really think it's racist to eat food from other cultures

    Simone Grojean
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So even in a joke site we need some good old fashioned sinophobia now?

    Άρης Παπαδόπουλος
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I believe the first post is from a news story a while ago, about a female student who wore a kimono-like dress in her graduation and received online hell for that. Too many sjw...

    Jadon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was a Chinese qipao, not a Japanese kimono

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    Christine K
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The alias 'JeannieBeanie99' already screams "RUN".

    Gerry Higgins
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I bet her head whistles in a crosswind.

    Amaranthim Talon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    gaaad- would these sad, blanket needing, puppy hugging, safety pin warriors just plain eat s**t and die alread? The joke was funny - the response- well..

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    #22

    Missed Jokes

    Edgar_left Report

    Johnny Frostbite
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I spy with my little eye SOME MAJOR INSECURITIES

    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't understand both "the camo" and "the John Cena" jokes either! They're talking about those things, but I never see them!

    Space Nurd
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

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    Happiness is Hippo
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This leg champion has a horrible attitude, no wonder he/she missed the joke!

    Wil Vanderheijden
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He was training his muscles while he should have trained his brain.

    Aaron Kara
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That guy really wanted people to know about the strength of his ridiculous legs

    Greg T
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So no sense of humor and another one of those "look at me" posters... I want my flip phone back

    Roger Haywood
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No intelligence competitions won tho. :)

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    #23

    Missed Jokes

    Ethan_Roberts123 Report

    silmarillion1
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    they thought it was a legit complaint with a joke on top, so they just ignored the joke and started to investigate the problem.

    Jose Baeyens
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well... look at the bright side : they are too worried about good customer service to get it....

    H. Roon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ahhhh too bad Virgin doesn't have a Wendy managing their social media accounts. So much lost potential here.

    KT Trondsen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh god, this reminds me of my old wifi name "teabags pleasure dome". Had to call tech support, the indian woman on the line helping was all "ohhh I love tea so much, it's so delicious, what kind of tea's do you sell there??" i almost died

    Don Flynn
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one me laugh out loud at work 😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣🤣😂

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They even included @Shitjokes in their response and still didn't see it.

    Roger Haywood
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is just typical Virgin Media not getting the joke. I thought it was funny as f*ck.

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    #24

    Missed Jokes

    hellaman21 Report

    Zenozenobee
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think his name is Logan Paul. I read something about how he filmed a deceased person in a Japanese wood famous for suicides.... But as we shouldn't keep making stupid people famous, it's not a shame that someone doesn't know him

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    Gerry Higgins
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ha! any more stupid and he'd have to be watered twice a week

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These people must have really boring lives.

    Trixster Million
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People who spell challenge as "challange" are looser's.

    Little letitia
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People who spell losers as "looser's" are "looser's"

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    chi-wei shen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've seen douchebags who would deserve the title "Crazy Condom Fail" much more than this guy.

    Ashlyn Jones
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I always knew Jake Paul was a fail... I feel bad for his parents

    Bobby Whittemore
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I didn't even know who Jake Paul is.....I just thought it was a generic douchebag photo!

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    Nostalgic Hyena
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The guy in the bottom left is either Logan Paul or Jake Paul. They're both brothers, and they're YouTubers who are famous even though they're actually terrible people. The post is basically trying to say that he shouldn't have been born.

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    Hemrich Gundesalf
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And that'll be two condom fails... and counting.

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    #25

    Missed Jokes

    Who_Cares99 Report

    Randy Dhuyvetter
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm not sure the owner missed the joke or went along with it.

    Wil Vanderheijden
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He missed it. Otherwise he would have posted something like: Thank you for your input. As laundry we do everything we can to maximize the customer experience. We therefore advise you not to save on the fabric softener on a subsequent visit in order to prevent the itchy feeling. We also think that prices are not too high given the quality of our machines. the length of the program offered and the use of extra soft water to spare your skin.

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    Samantha Robinson
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    *Slowly backs out of laundromat with rolls of quarters*

    S Bagci
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We do not offer rides .......... Thats what you think !!

    Jeff__Coon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can't... breathe... laughing..... too... hard...

    Lisa Shaw
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They actually do, they just may not know it! As teenagers, when we had nothing better to do, we would go to the laundromat and bet each other how long we could take a "dryer ride" for.

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    #26

    Missed Jokes

    RaaviRaviticus Report

    Daria B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The spelling rules are strong with this one...

    Nina S
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think you mean the spelling rules OUR strong with this one

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    Happiness is Hippo
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m going to tell that fact to any and all small children I meet from now on, Thomas Running deserves way more recognition! :D

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Great idea! Then watch them try to Google it.

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    Ellis
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If I'm not mistaken, chewing wasn't invented by John Smith but by Marc Chewing instead. I understand the confusion though.

    Alia G.
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ha ha "walk twice at the same time"

    stellermatt
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    fun fact though, the guy that 'invented' jogging, died whilst jogging.

    WhiteFox
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    'are dna.' im sorry but how old are you?

    Daria B
    Community Member
    7 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Pray" also. Capitalisation rules as well. And let's not forget interpunction. But now that's more grammar than spelling.

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    Mimis Nachbarin
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    yeah, man, get that bs out of here - and get some humour in.

    Dian Ella Lillie
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the responder isn't John Stupid, he should consider changing his name...

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    #27

    Missed Jokes

    killawithana , Lesterstweets Report

    chi-wei shen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The answer by purple7122 is symptomatic for so many discussions on the internet. Many people are so outraged by small errors that they cannot even see the bigger picture or, in this case, the joke. It’s as if his/her brain stopped processing any information after reading the words Star Trek.

    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Keyboard warriors, security of the anonymity and "People are bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling"

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    Lu
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm starting to see why being a troll can be so amusing.

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone should paint that trashcan to look like R2- D2. That would encourage the children to properly dispose of their trash.

    Don Flynn
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poor RD2... he musta been partying with Charlie Sheen

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd say "WHOOOOSH!!!" again but there is no sound in space. Well, except for galaxies far, far away...

    KT Trondsen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow, talk about an aggressive over reaction

    John Montgomery
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You know, I'm still not quite sure who this type of joke is making fun of. Is it people who know a lot of sci-fi, or people who pretend to know a lot about sci fi?

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    #28

    Missed Jokes

    JDRuzkin Report

    Stale Squid
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was GOING to try to 1-up your comment game, but then this happened. Teach me your ways Jedi master. * bows *

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    Ande H
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ANY SALAD IS A CEASER SALAD IF YOU STAB IT HARD ENOUGH

    tarebear
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It makes me smile when the ignorant/ uppity one called the poster an idiot and then they look like one...there is a special karma for them and it's instantaneous and THAT my fellow panda people is something to smile about

    Selina Ali
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Says the idiot who missed the joke...

    Monkey d. Karaya
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one is hilarious. How do you miss that. He's probably never had salad before

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    #29

    Missed Jokes

    DevL_Brady Report

    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What is Fornight - apart from 2 weeks in a row??

    Dragomir Boiadzhiev
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Apparently you are not a married middle-aged woman :)

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    Ladies and Gentlemen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fortnite is stupid game, no matter whoever plays it!

    minerva15
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm hoping it's just a fad, like fidget spinners and Angry Birds, that it will blow over.

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    I-ate-all-the-cheese
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I admit...that one took me a few to understand....but then, LOL!

    anonymous
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    aint that the rip off of the simpsons arnorld swrstneggar

    Joe CHAHINE
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    @Daniel_Perez your middle aged mom should have been playing fortnight... the world would have been better off

    S Bagci
    Community Member
    7 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    My 11 year old son claims he hates Fortnite. But he plays it all the time and YES he asks for my credit card all the freaking time.

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    #30

    Missed Jokes

    Aerd_Gander Report

    Emma B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Freedom has no boundaries." BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

    SnowyLynx
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    W***y Wonka chocolate mixer: 110%. Lol

    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love how "the blue" kept going with the freedom stuff! Maybe "the red" will get it after this?

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    #31

    Missed Jokes

    jimmy0441 Report

    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've already posted this somewhere in BP, but what the hell: "There are 3 sorts of people in the world, those who know how to count, and those who don't!"

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, there are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who can understand binary numbers and those who cannot.

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    Disinterested Panda
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There are 10 types of people in the world: Those that understand binary and those who don't.

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I missed the ship" (was that today?)

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Congrats, insanus.x. You learned to count.

    The Schuyler Sisters
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It is 2020. Unfortunately, you should have stayed in 2018. Or 2019.

    Bianca Du Toit
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd say the words on the wall would be "Flee, flee you fools!"

    Monkey d. Karaya
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I sort of get the joke but then i don't. Can someone explain it to me

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    #32

    Missed Jokes

    asherLdisaster Report

    Zenozenobee
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Friendzone".... I'm tired of this word. If you act nice toward a woman just to get in her bed, you're not a nice guy nor a friend so, you're just in the "douchezone".

    SnowyLynx
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Women do that too, just saying. But I agree with he douche-zone thing. I think all people are douches at some point

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    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That first guy sounds like he's always in the friendzone. I can see why.

    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, maybe he's a d*** to girls and proud of it?

    Allie Faux
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Actually silmarillion1, the guy who 'just' acts nice to or just does nice things for a woman so that woman will agree to a romantic or sexual relationship with him will think he's been 'friendzoned' if the woman doesn't want to be in that kind of relationship with him. In other words, when just being a woman's friend isn't good enough for him, if the 'friendship' he has with her doesn't become sexual than that kind of guy thinks he's been 'friendzoned'. What he doesn't realize is that the woman probably assumed all along that he was her friend, because to a woman that's what being a friend is - you help each other when your friend needs help. You don't just help a person because you want to get in their bed.

    Michael awdry
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh juice-us crust that’s amazing

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    #33

    Missed Jokes

    policeband Report

    Dian Ella Lillie
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My sister's never seen a mirror that she didn't like.

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mirror factories never hire ugly people.

    Laugh Fan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Be worse if they hired clumsy ones - think of all that bad luck!!!

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    Kathy Cosham
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When my son was 14, I asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. Son: I don't know! Me: Well, what can you see yourself doing? Son: Installing mirrors.

    Bindi Adams
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He may have to reflect on that....

    Άρης Παπαδόπουλος
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    -Mirror mirror on the floor, who's the biggest d*ck of all?

    Space Nurd
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think this guy needs a trip to the mirror factory to see how stupid he is.

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    #34

    Missed Jokes

    LegomoreYT Report

    Dian Ella Lillie
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wonder if they also sell bluetooth wallets...?

    Monika Soffronow
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They do indeed. I believe the shop is just next to the one selling extra time.

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    S Bagci
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It just sucks up the water from the moisture in the air ................

    chi-wei shen
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This technology also can be used for showerheads. Just think about this, showering whereever you want. kjgu6cm8yc...f254ca.jpg kjgu6cm8ycuz-5b97abdf254ca.jpg

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Since when does Richard Gere water his own lawn?

    Bindi Adams
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Should install them on all firetrucks, get rid of those pesky hoses....(said with straight face!!!)

    Georgann Haeffner
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This would be a great magic trick for Michael Carbanaro

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've been trying to think of a Kickstarter idea to get rich. I call "DIBS!"

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    #35

    Missed Jokes

    SirPikaPika Report

    CyberMew
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The character guessed what the rock said and replied before the rock said it

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    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ok, who's that character? And:

    Master Markus
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's Joseph Joestar. I don't know if you're making a joke now, but it's not working out properly.

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    Monkey d. Karaya
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think i get it. He guessed it before.

    Red
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    XDD yea that took me a tad too long

    Ande H
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    GOOD GRIEF good greif needs some serious help

    Fred Burrows
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Johnny Carson and the envelope humor.

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    #36

    Missed Jokes

    reddit.com Report

    maswartz
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sadly some people actually think Obama was responsible for the horrible response to Katrina.

    tarebear
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Isn't he responsible for any and everything that ever has and ever will go wrong or....??

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    H. Roon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The cuckold dotard donnie j and his dipshit supporters would be absolutely hilarious for their innate insanity if they weren't so terrifyingly dangerous to the sanctity and security of this country. If only they'd remained under their rocks....but then it wouldn't have become so globally obvious, and absolutely apparent, that the genetic viability within this country had waned a very long time ago.

    Sharon Vaughn
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eight years of Obama's administration saw two major storms hit the US: Sandy and Matthew. Less than two years into Trump's administration, and we've seen Harvey, Irma, and Maria in 2017, and now Florence in 2018. It's almost like Mother Nature is trying to tell us something, or Trump's hot air is effecting the weather in the worst way.

    La Petite Morte
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And I apologize for being snippy. I could have put things a little more tactfully.

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And no one was happy with Dubya's response to the disaster.

    Sarah Britt
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ok, I think this one is my favorite out of all of them 😂😂

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    #37

    Missed Jokes

    MixBrigade Report

    Jolijn Njamin-Geurts van Kessel
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or you didn't understand the sarcasm of the person responding to your joke?

    Joe CHAHINE
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or I didn't understand your sarcasm about responding to the person that is sarcastically joking on that sarcastic reply

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    SnowyLynx
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So mean, but funny. Made this joke about a teacher at my school

    Daria B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eheheh. For the distracted ones → it's the last commenter who didn't understand the after-joke.

    Samantha Robinson
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am a horrible human being for laughing at this joke.

    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Isn't that a Kevin Durant joke? :)

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    #38

    Missed Jokes

    Blazing_Buizel_7 Report

    Daria B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yep! I totally know a few women in my life who look like various kinds of dog breeds! Quit whining! ♥

    Nina S
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wanna pet this woman so bad, she looks like a good girl

    Michelle
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You are sadly mistaken. That right there is a VERY good girl. Lol

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    Zenozenobee
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Quit your anti-feminist bulls**t for a moment and realize that people can make joke"

    Wyndmere
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think B_B was refering to the fluffy blonde hair. -- (LOL!)

    Collin Lyle
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need to see her play that guitar. How fantastic would that be?

    Monika Soffronow
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These photos are fantastic: https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2018/sep/10/do-you-look-like-your-dog-canine-human-lookalikes-in-pictures

    Kevin Moore
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow. It really is a dog-eat-dog world...

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    #39

    Missed Jokes

    FR057Y_toast Report

    Dian Ella Lillie
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As an Australian, I can most vehementaly assure you that our toilest do flush in the opposite direction.

    Emma B
    Community Member
    7 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is the GREATEST comment I have ever read on the internet! This made my year! Thank you kind Australian person! I love you! EDIT: I can see how this may seem sarcastic, but I truly did enjoy that comment.

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    Markus McCloud
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Downvotes are just upvotes from Australian users! XD

    Maria Campbell
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I get a headache here in Australia all the time.

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🎶 It comes from the land down under 🎶

    KieLeaHar
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As an Australian, I can assure you that it is VERY HARD to find a very nice looking loaf of bread like that!! Most of the time at major supermarkets the top is ALWAYS over cooked/burnt 🤢

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    #40

    Missed Jokes

    Sealeopy Report

    Dian Ella Lillie
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I weep. And not just for the responder...

    tarebear
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My faith in humans goes down a single notch with every one of these I read.....

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    Wiggity
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If ever there was an avatar photo that could predict this response, it's this guy's.

    Popescu Adina
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But if he can't count how do we know that he is bad at only 2 things? I vote all statements are true, lol

    Red
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    me to me: D.O.N.T. S.A.Y. A.N.Y.T.H.I.N.G

    Sora Lyra
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow.. Is that BTS's fans replied the tweet?

    Alyse
    Community Member
    7 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it kind of funny cus its like known for... but in the biblical sense

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    #41

    Missed Jokes

    Ronald_Swanson_ Report

    SykesDaMan
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This joke is sad though! :(

    H. Roon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The "joke" about the myth that is the nonexistent black father isn't funny, and is hurtful instead. Black dads are the BEST and it simply isn't true that they aren't around more so than any other race. Not feeling this, or the s****y comments from the racists these days that just love to publicly patronize a negative stereotype based on race any chance they get. Not cool.

    Trixster Million
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A black boy of about 12 was making fun of me for being homeless, so I finally said, "boy, I could be your daddy." He said, "no you can't, my daddy's BLACK!" I said "how do you know that?" and he started crying and left.

    Wyndmere
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Great shaving cream; still jolding its shape 817 days later. What brand is it?

    Lu
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Man, this is deep. If it's in fact a social commentary...

    Monkey d. Karaya
    Community Member
    5 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you look at this in another way, I can relate. But, XD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Steve Barker
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, would you?? Kid's waiting to smash you in the face with whip cream??

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    #42

    Missed Jokes

    JanewayForPresident Report

    My O My
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So it's pretts dumb of the polar bear to go to the jungle, right?

    Joseph Kuhlman
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love that this is on an r/jokes subreddit

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And all this time, I thought Polar Bears were from the Arctic. Where is the Artic, anyway? 😋

    Gerry Higgins
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Go to the mirror to get the answer to that question

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    #43

    Missed Jokes

    MysteriousPenguins Report

    Stale Squid
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But... what if he DID eat the balloon? 🤔 DOUG IS THAT YOU?!

    Aaron Kara
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "This just in, an upside down photo of a dog has caused idiots over the world to fill their dogs with helium"

    Rebekah
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eat a balloon... LOLOLOL!!!!!

    Steve Bowman
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Come on. Isn't "Did he eat a balloon?" the same comment that someone on BP would make? I think that's meant to be funny.

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, he's super-glued to the ceiling. Anyone can see that. Duh!

    Bindi Adams
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Unless of course the dog did eat a helium balloon, and the owner has carpet on their ceiling...

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    #44

    Missed Jokes

    KtSuper01 Report

    Emma B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just so I'm on the same page (because I am not a British person, nor someone who is up on social media stuff): that's a fake BBC account, yes?

    Crep 105
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, you asked for real news, so you're kind of asking for it.

    Michael awdry
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And that’s why you don’t say anything to the news

    Michael awdry
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thirty points to house BBC Thirty points from house Linus.

    Ryo Bakura
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Linus needs his eyesight re-examined. Oh, and his blanket.

    Madhu Mitha
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This has got to be higher in the list!

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    #46

    Missed Jokes

    jkaeagle Report

    Wendillon
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ahhh D...you were always my favourite.

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What??? And I missed that all these years!

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    #47

    Missed Jokes

    Jakesnake523 Report

    LittleGrayMouse
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My textdoor neighbour has been giving out my number while going out for years... Get some interesting phonecalls sometimes.

    MnM2520
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you'll excuse me, I need to text someone real quick...

    Jerry Kaiser
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I tried this, but my wife responded “what?!”

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    #48

    Missed Jokes

    patrick_junge Report

    Daria B
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry, Drake. The Scorpions were there first! ♥

    La Petite Morte
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And they will rock you like a hurricane with the winds of change if you just follow your heart and believe in love, in the rhythm of love.

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    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cultural appropriation of wildlife

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I got introduced to a scorpion when I was a little girl. Very painful. The irony is that it's my sign.

    Crep 105
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    His angry face makes me think of an angry toddler trying to sound smart.

    diane a
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They must have named the creatures after the heavy metal group

    GlassOfWater
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And they named a duck after him!

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    #49

    Missed Jokes

    MochiMar Report

    BusLady
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can't bring in outside food. They want to charge you $5 for a bucket of day old popcorn covered in "butter."

    Rebekah
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    $5??? Hot damn, where do you live? That's a steal!

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    Tom Servo
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Technically they got the joke, just made it REALLY obvious for some reason...

    Chelle Jones
    Community Member
    7 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow the comment section on here is whoosh. LOL

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