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There's no bond between two people more special than marriage. At least in the beginning. But like most special things, it slowly becomes less special with time, and before you know it you're being forced to share your pizza with a person who won't even let you use their iPhone charger, even though they always use yours. Sound familiar? Then check out this list of 2016's funniest tweets about marriage. Compiled by Bored Panda, the collection is sure to have every married person secretly nodding in agreement. Don't forget to vote for the funniest!
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#5
#14
Fifi Latte 8 years ago
My husband said this about the dishwasher. I laughed and walked away. There is GIANT pile of dishes in the sink. The dishwasher is broken
over opinionated 8 years ago
The hubby and I have an understanding that's always worked. S/he who cooks the other cleans. Works wonderful. I love cooking and he loves eating. I rarely do dishes.
It's Caturday 8 years ago
The bro is smart, he still wants to get laid that week
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#20
#25
#26
#27
Tabitha Trevino 8 years ago
I hate buying toilet paper. I always buy multiple big packs. Why the dread I don't know
#30
#36
#39
Tracy Baparam 8 years ago
So glad I'm not the only one with this struggle, Every Freaking Day!
#42
#59
Abbie Smith 8 years ago
Was telling my husband this, I just gave him the stare for the wife blank, he thought he honestly did something wrong xD
#61
over opinionated 8 years ago
*Sets Wal-Mart alarm clocks to go off in one minute intervals ten minutes from now. Waits and watches a safe distance away.*
#62
over opinionated 8 years ago
Lmao. How excited the hubby gets when he wins a $50 pro-line (Ontario Canada sports lottery)
#64
Elaina Moss 8 years ago
Oh yea...oh hey, did you need help with that? No, I got it now...that it's done...
#65
JillVille Child Care 8 years ago
If all those boxes contain costumes, I want that basement! Oh the fun we could have!!
#67
#68
over opinionated 8 years ago
Men like when you're around but not in there way. They hate being alone but don't bother them... especially during play offs.
#71
Steve Moore 8 years ago
Ever try to convince your beloved that , contrary to his/her misapprehension, there are TWO a's in "caramel" ? Really gets up my nose when I hear "carmel."
#78
#94
#102
JoAnne Costello 8 years ago
Definitely on if the paper isn't cascading over the top of the roll!
#104
#105
Steve Moore 8 years ago
Cor, I don't half envy this bloke. I "get" to store my knickers in a drawer of our bedroom's entertainment centre !
#117
#133
Lauren Frank 8 years ago
During an argument: Me: that’s not logical. It doesn’t make any sense. W: I DON’T CARE Me: well ok then. I guess you win
#134
Claire Mellusco 8 years ago
The entire place is soaked and the brand new bottle of bathroom spray is half empty, that's how I tell.
#152
Lucy Sharp 8 years ago
This one I disagree with. I'm a bit OCD in the sense that I like the dishes next to the sink and not in the sink...
#159
Cassandra Johnson 8 years ago
How is this not higher up? All I can hear is that sound now... It's unnerving...
#161
Jennifer Crompton 8 years ago
Ooooh this is a touchy one. You have to split up the job here. Wife packs the bags, husband packs the car and neither are allowed input on the other's part. It's the only way to stay married. Lol
#163
#170
Jennifer Crompton 8 years ago
Balding in men, especially men that go bald on the young side, is caused by high levels of testosterone. I think women are subconsciously attracted to men with high testosterone. That's my theory on why most bald men are already taken 😉
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What do you think ?
Jim Doire 8 years ago
I've been happily married for 34 years and all of these are so true. You quickly cut the bull and get down to business in a real relationship. If a couple never fights, someone is giving in way too much. They've become a dish rag.
Nettan Andersson 8 years ago
Get married they said. It will be fun they said. Now we are getting a divorce...#marriedfor3monthsitwillbefuntheysaid
Mark O'Connor 8 years ago
My Wife likes to talk to me during Sex!! She calls me from motel rooms!
Joane Whitehouse 8 years ago
Hard to pick just one best. They're all so funny, I especially liked #1, 10 & 53
Onoriode Elofusim 8 years ago
They are all so funny and hilarious but display realities of being married. I especially enjoyed those by James Breakwell. Love this post.
Catalina Ioan 8 years ago
Somewhat funny, but these kinds of lists tend to give me the distinct feeling that they're less about "what married life is like", and more about "what married life is like when you marry the wrong person / get jaded / stop giving a damn"
DK Persad 8 years ago
LOL actually no. Im in a relationship with very much the right person and these are hilarious and also very true. I worry more about folks who never argue and can hug all night (supposedly).
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Jim Doire 8 years ago
I've been happily married for 34 years and all of these are so true. You quickly cut the bull and get down to business in a real relationship. If a couple never fights, someone is giving in way too much. They've become a dish rag.
Nettan Andersson 8 years ago
Get married they said. It will be fun they said. Now we are getting a divorce...#marriedfor3monthsitwillbefuntheysaid
Mark O'Connor 8 years ago
My Wife likes to talk to me during Sex!! She calls me from motel rooms!
Joane Whitehouse 8 years ago
Hard to pick just one best. They're all so funny, I especially liked #1, 10 & 53
Onoriode Elofusim 8 years ago
They are all so funny and hilarious but display realities of being married. I especially enjoyed those by James Breakwell. Love this post.
Catalina Ioan 8 years ago
Somewhat funny, but these kinds of lists tend to give me the distinct feeling that they're less about "what married life is like", and more about "what married life is like when you marry the wrong person / get jaded / stop giving a damn"
DK Persad 8 years ago
LOL actually no. Im in a relationship with very much the right person and these are hilarious and also very true. I worry more about folks who never argue and can hug all night (supposedly).
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