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“Corporate Humor”: 40 Memes About Office Life That Hit Way Too Close To Home
While every job has its ups and downs, the nine-to-five grind sure does hold its challenges. Just picture the petty bosses, the daunting piles of work, and the never-ending whispers by the water cooler that confront you from the moment you step foot through the front door. Well, sometimes all you can do is have a look at a broad range of hilarious memes to get you through the day.
Thanks to the Corporate Humor Instagram account, we have a place that temporarily lets us forget our worries by sharing funny images and jokes for all the desk-bound poor souls out there. “Here to provide comic relief to those working in the corporate world,” the creator writes in the description, and they deliver.
After all, there’s nothing like having a genuine laugh to instantly lift up the spirits. So we combed the account and handpicked some of the most chuckle-worthy and painfully accurate posts that capture the essence of what being an office employee really feels like. Continue scrolling and upvote the ones you liked most!
Psst! If you’re interested in even more humorous work memes, be sure to check out our previous compilations about real office struggles and frustrated underpaid employees.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
David Henry 3 years ago
I'm now disabled due to chronic pain, and if I could manage to time the interview for exactly on my "good" days, I've absolutely considered taking job interviews just so I could respond to interview questions honestly and watch their reaction.
Josh Coker 3 years ago
my last job was THIS. it was an hourly job? but he expected WAY more from me for a lousy 10.50 an hour. my current job? i make more than double delivering packages. :)
TomĆ”Å” Michek 3 years ago
People constantly complaining about starting with lower wage while complaing about not getting a pay raise seem like idiots to me...
RELATED:
We managed to get in touch with the creator of Corporate Humor who was kind to have a little chat with us. The founder told Bored Panda they started this account at the beginning of the pandemic. "I was starting to get burnt out and needed a way to vent. I always thought humor and sarcasm was a good way to relieve some of the stress, so I started making my first memes," they said.
Initially, they believed it’d be just friends and family who might find them funny "but more and more people found it relatable! I’m still amazed that the following grew to 20K+." They revealed that some devoted fans send DMs with their own ideas or personal experiences and then the founder creates jokes based on them.
"I try to build relationships with my followers. I’ve set up polls to learn more about their experiences," they said and added that it’s always nice to hear from them. "When I get messages like 'wow I just went through this' or 'thank you for making us laugh!', it makes my day." At times, the account has also served as a means to help followers get connected with one another for job opportunities.
#3
Tara Curry 3 years ago
Silliest reason I got a message from HR: I forgot to sync up my phone for the fitness challenge (it automatically syncs on iPhones but I have an android)
#4
Baskar R D 1 year ago
If you get the debt, then you should get everything from the previous life too.
However, the curator of the account told us that sometimes it’s quite difficult to manage the page. "Creating memes, posting consistently, making sure I respond can take up a lot of time. But I enjoy doing it, so it’s worth it," they added.
When it comes to the community, most people following the account are between the ages of 25 and 34. "And it’s a pretty close split between male and female. My followers mainly reside in NY, Boston, and Chicago but there are some in different parts of the world (like London and Singapore)."
"It’s amazing how far this account has reached," the creator told us. And it seems that fans of the page are really active as well, "but I always try to make my posts/stories engaging so there’s constant engagement!"
#5
Kusotare 3 years ago
Having had to read my emails in a deposition, this. (And it was kind of awkward having to explain what "IANAL" meant to a roomful of attorneys.)
LittleLiz 3 years ago (edited)
During their divorce, my dad printed out the emails between my mother and her boyfriend "cybering". They were read out loud in the courtroom. Her Southern Baptist parents were there. Don't say anything in email that you don't want read in court.
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Bayou Billy 3 years ago
I do the opposite so that I'm not asked to do customer service. I give 100%honest feedback to customers hah. It's fun. Screw you I'm warehouse...
Amy Doyle 3 years ago
I hate writing emails. It's something I have to do, but I always spend so much time on them, making sure the layout, grammar, punctuation all make sense.
Ben Nelson 3 years ago
The best part is writing group emails knowing that no matter how much time and effort you spend on keeping it clear and concise, at least one important chucklefuck isn't even going to open the email until three days after you prompt him about it, and one more will somehow manage to completely misread the entire thing anyway.
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Lisa Valen 3 years ago
I don't dance, even if I KNOW no one is watching. I don't sing if there is the slightest possibility someone might hear me. And everything I write, text, e-mail is only sent once I'm certain it won't come back to bite me in the...well you know.
Riley Quinn 3 years ago
I don't give a crap who sees me dancing, but no one will ever get dirt on me via text or emails. I may dance like a nit wit, but my documents prove I'm not.
#6
Lakota Wolf 3 years ago
Doors were wider when the company first started out. Then came the budget cuts, and they had to make the doors smaller to cut back on costs.
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JJ Mai 3 years ago
My current boss emails his assistant "Does this need to be a meeting or can we just e-mail it to everyone?" His 17-year-old daughter taught him the "This could have been an e-mail" meme and now he is paranoid about wasting people's time. He's very chill though. Progress reports showed more productivity with remote working and he was excited to downsize his building while maintaining the same workload. We did have a zoom meeting talking about how dumb other businesses in the building were for forcing workers back and it spiraled into complaining about traffic and perky morning people lol
Lisa Valen 3 years ago
Me in the meeting...please don't grab that pastry, please don't choose that pastry, please let me get that pastry before someone else does, good...only 2 more people before the box is passed to me... Well, s**t...
#7
Kusotare 3 years ago
I worked with a guy who got his hair cut during work hours. He reasoned that since it grew on company time, it could get cut on company time.
Cactus McCoy 3 years ago
Well? We had a hairdresser come into work at one point. Was exchanged for a person doing massages later, as more people had stressed backs from sitting than problems seeing their screens because of hair in their eyes.
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tuzdayschild 3 years ago
Well...considering the place you're sitting on Monday at 9am is probably causing the tears...
Hanna Henderson 3 years ago
āBoss gets a dollar, I get a dime, thats why I cry on company timeā!!!
Carlos Bergade 3 years ago
Some friends of mine donĀ“t enjoy Sundays because they start thinking of work, i.e wonĀ“t come for a BBQ or lunch or a live gig at 5pm, beach shack. We canĀ“t let them win. Enjoy life, then work. IĀ“ve had some pretty demanding jobs, 15 hours days for weeks but some how always manged not get me down.
Riley Quinn 3 years ago
Weekends are for pleasure and relaxation. The work week is for all the drama.
Whether you work in the tiniest cubicle or an airy open-plan office, there are a lot of frustrating factors associated with corporate life. When they leave you with zero energy and motivation, the only place of refuge seems to be those amusing memes that help you maintain at least some level of sanity.
Joshua Klapow, Ph.D., psychologist and creator of MentalDrive, told Bored Panda that every single one of us needs comic relief. “Laughter is the polar opposite of the stress, distress, frustration, and fatigue we can often feel as we work our jobs day in and day out. An intermittent dose of humor that results in a mood shift, even temporarily, can reset us emotionally and give us more emotional strength to carry on in our work,” he explained.
#8
Auntriarch 3 years ago
Where I work it's more like Animal Farm, at a certain level you can't tell the pigs from the humans
Amy Doyle 3 years ago
I swear companies think they are diverse if they have one black woman and a gay man, out of all of the hundreds white males.
Kate Koppen 1 year ago
nooo it has to be a gay fat black woman to hit the diversity all-in-one.
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Lisa Valen 3 years ago
Workplaces shouldn't have to worry about "diversity". The person best suited for the position should get the position, regardless.
Dale Kastelberg 3 years ago
Just a quick question:. Why did it take 3 African-American women to take over my job when diversity reared its ugly head and l -- a White woman -- was laid off to bring in these woman who knew absolutely nothing about accounting. Eventually, a 4th African-American woman was hired to help the other 3. I did this job for 4 years by myself, no overtime, so please someone explain this to me.
Jasmyn JAY 3 years ago
Maybe ask the person who fired you Dale. Maybe giu just have a š© attitude=personality
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#9
Monic Krugell 3 years ago
I felt it too..... This little girl knows how my inner child feels
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AnnaBanananna 3 years ago
I though it said āpotatoā š„ instead of photo. Iād prefer ok, potato
Tonia Sizemore 3 years ago
Poor lil girl. I always feel so bad when I see pictures with kids crying and upset!!
David Force 3 years ago
I never found coloring to be that upsetting. I do have a strong urge to get her a popsicle.
Sharon Kenty 3 years ago
Interesting how Hide-the- Pain Harold and his daugher are juxtaposed next to each other...
#10
kath morgan 3 years ago (edited)
Iām glad it wasnāt just me that saw Picard when I read this.
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Although office life is not as physically challenging as some other professions out there, we’re well aware it can affect our state of mind. Sometimes, the overwhelming amount of work, petty politics, and fights over who gets to climb the corporate ladder can quickly lead to higher levels of stress, anxiety, and even burnout. Sadly, many people in traditional corporate roles glide through life without even realizing they experience it.
Klapow explained that burnout is a condition that is officially recognized by the World Health Organization as an occupational hazard. He listed some of the most important symptoms of burnout people should be on the lookout for:
- Fatigue related to work
- Emotional disengagement and/or apathy for the job
- Dissatisfaction with the work environment despite any changes or positive modifications
- Difficulty concentrating at work, diminished productivity and efficiency, greater frequency of mistakes
- A general dislike for the present work with no optimistic view of changes in the future
#11
Mama Penguin 3 years ago
Well, let's see...I need to pay my bills and have a roof over my head and I could see myself doing this job with a relatively smaller risk of wanting to jab a pen in my eye socket.
Madzdad the Bard 3 years ago
That is a valid question. I have asked companies why that position needs to be filled. Sometimes they are so shocked, they actually tell me. The interview is generally over at that point.
Lindsey Leigh Phillips 3 years ago
Because the creation of the fbi made dillinger-style bank robbing a non-viable option.
Riley Quinn 3 years ago
Prior to self-employment, I would prepare for interviews to enable me to interview the interviewee. I love a good power-play.
#12
Brian Garrett 3 years ago
Hey hey HEY. Will Wheaton deserves to make a living like the rest of us
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BasedWang12 3 years ago
And it's the kinda s**t me and my buddy would talk for hours about in 6th grade...... Now that Im older it'd be considered stupid by most, and then BOOM someones makin money off it
NsG 3 years ago
Or the fact that the *synopsis pitch* was "snakes on a plane" and they didn't even bother changing the title
James016 3 years ago
They had the idea to change the name but Samuel L Jackson told the film makers not to.
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#13
Just Jessee 3 years ago
You're just letting corporate know that they've got a chance with you as a controllable zombie
Load More Replies... JJ Mai 3 years ago
I now live 2 hours away from my office. My work can 100% be done remotely. I did used to live within 10 minutes of the building and my boss knew that. We were e-mailing back and forth one day and he wanted me to pick up some physical papers within the hour. I reminded him that I moved because I was promised my work would stay 100% remote. He was straight up just like "I'll overnight you the files. It'd be cheaper to pay premium shipping than for the gas for that drive." (We got paid mileage for extra driving as sometimes we would meet clients at other places or have to pick up items/files from other places.) My current job is the best one I have had. I do go in 1 day a month to handle certain updates and do reviews, but I get paid for my driving back and forth and only actually work 4-6 hours.
Riley Quinn 3 years ago
Businesses that are forcing workers back into the office are ignoring the environmental catastrophe that's occurring. I hope they all go bankrupt.
Diane Rice 3 years ago
The Nerds from SNL: Ined: You know Marshall, as a single mother Iāve had to be both mother and father to Lisa. Todd: And youāve done a terrific job, Mrs. Loopner. Marshall: Uhhā¦Ined, I hope this isnāt indelicate [picks his nose] but, how did Mr. Loopner pass away? Ined: He was born without a spine. It was always just a matter of time. Marshall: And, and what exactly did he do for a living? Ined: Oh, didnāt you know? He invented the slinky. Lisa: Yeah, unfortunately he didnāt call it the slinky and he didnāt patent it. But he sued the slinky people for 5 million dollars, and he lost.
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Moreover, some companies seem to be on a mission to create toxic work environments for their workers. The psychologist mentioned that once people recognize their workplace could be labeled as one, they need to do what they can to resolve these harmful situations.
“That being said, if it is a larger toxic culture, or a work structure that is inappropriate or unhealthy for you psychologically, then it is crucial that you begin to look, if possible, at other work options. Working in a psychologically toxic environment doesn’t get better, it will make you psychologically worse,” Klapow said.
#14
Jason Starnes 3 years ago
Ah, the delusions of the manager who still thinks it's the mid nineties and 'I have a stack of applications on my desk...'. What's funny, or sad, is they really believe it's not them
Vera Bean The Tire Ant Queen 3 years ago
True story. Manager said similar to me (jokingly as she was fairly cool) and I had to point out to her that two were filled out by people who were caught shoplifting from our store, one had either poop or chocolate smeared on it, another had their hours as 9-5 no weekends or holidays, and another was literally filled out in crayon.
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Crystal Lamas 3 years ago
Years ago, I worked at well known fast food restaurant. Let's call it...The golden arches. Well, I was a high school student and a minor so I could only work afternoons/evenings and never to close. Most of the staff during my shift were classmates anyhow so everyone knew this. I was very careful and meticulous in learning my schedule when it was posted because I was also in sports at school. So whenever I saw a potential conflict I went directly to the store manager. Not the shift manager, the store manager. She was very understanding. One time, my schedule was changed mid week and I was livid. Not only was I not told, I was lied to by the shift manager when I approached her during said shift change. I was set to leave at 8pm. Schedule change read 10pm. She was adamant that it wasn't changed but I explained I wrote my schedule down in 3 different places and have to give a copy to school. She told me I wasn't leaving until 10. I left at 8. Apron and hat on the counter.
Priscilla Wagner 3 years ago
When I first started working as a teenager,y dad gave me some advice as a manager himself. Always make a copy of the schedule when it's posted. It's a contract and a contract goes BOTH ways.
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Bender Bending RodrĆguez 3 years ago
I have never seen a boss in my life that admits their own mistake.
Steve Graham 1 year ago
It couldn't also be that the culture has changed and people now want $200,000 to work when they feel like it, at their own pace with no guidelines or set schedule.
Misty Moon 3 years ago
Oh let's not forget the sh*tty wages that comes with that craptastic managing!
#15
Chris Malme 3 years ago
Actual conversation I once had... Boss: "There's research that shows that 'more money' is not really a good motivator." Me: "Sure, but the feeling you're being screwed is a great demotivator!" I got the raise.
Priscilla Wagner 3 years ago
Who did this so-called research?? Show me the money!!
Load More Replies... LittleLiz 3 years ago
By "pizza party", they mean spending my 15 minute break waiting in line behind my coworkers to get a cold slice of little Caesars
Valley Girl 3 years ago
Stuff the Caesars in your mouth and like it! Pizza could be from the cafeteria!
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Jjjane20 3 years ago (edited)
Yes, but we are only told, not treated this way.
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Melissa Peck 3 years ago
Hated these. We were expected to get our pizza, go back to our desk and work through our lunch.
D00FINSHMERTZ 3 years ago
Do you mean to tell me that some companies buy pizza for the staff!?!? WTF!
Julie MommaWolf 3 years ago
I LOVED my last job. pay was so so but we got lunch once a week. From good restaurants, and there was no limit on the meal we picked. On Fridays once a month we cooked breakfast in the office and had mimosas. We did Christmas exchanges. They catered a hall for Christmas, weāre talking prime rib, all the trimming, open bar. . . Very flexible if I needed a day off at the last minute I MISS THAT PLACE
Misty Moon 3 years ago
Wow...that sounds amazing. Makes me want to hold onto the tiny TINY piece of faith in humanity that I have left. Lol. No but really, it's refreshing to hear that somewhere someone is actually being appreciated and respected at work. :)
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#16
Nadia Monteira 3 years ago
This one is so important. Health, living your life, enjoying friends, family and hobbies are so more important that a job title. But for this you have to get rid of ego and peer pressure
Vira 3 years ago (edited)
Also, pro-tip, stop obsessing over what other people are doing. Aka stop judging, and putting down others because they have what you don't, or aren't working as hard as you think they should. You can't take that resentment to the grave, but you will sure as he** get there faster if you sit on it for the days you have left.
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kristina law 3 years ago
Pssshhhttt lol if it has the word "health" in it then it is completely out of the question, sadly! At least in America.
Jessany Trotter 3 years ago
So much more to a person than just their job title and salary! So much more!
NsG 3 years ago
Because a lot of Western cultures still place a stigma and social standing on the difference between analyst and cleaner. There's also a mental shortcut - I'm going to assume that a business intelligence processor will be earning 10-20k more than data entry clerk,for example (I'd be wrong, because you can make a job title mean *anything*)
Load More Replies...So if you find yourself experiencing the signs of burnout (general dissatisfaction, fatigue, apathy, no positive outlook about change or the future), Klapow suggested it’s time to take action. First, you could consider a job or career change. “The change may be within the same organization — it may be a different job position or different job duties.”
Also, you could “spend some time thinking and writing down what would make a job feel more engaging and healthier. You can’t move to your ideal job if you don’t know what it is.” Lastly, Klapow stressed it’s important to pace yourself, step back if possible, and take some PTO.
“Ultimately, this is about earning money and living emotionally healthy. If you are earning money but burning yourself out psychologically then the money earned is having negative consequences on you and those around you.”
#17
Beth S 3 years ago
I am totally going to use that hbd cake for my son's 22nd birthday next year. He will laugh his ass off.
Sophie Norton 3 years ago
I apologize in advance, but what does "hbd" mean, please ?
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Kathleen R. 3 years ago
The cake on the right is not nearly minimalistic enough. Honestly why would you bother to add the period?
Tom Jacobs 3 years ago
Ouch... If it makes you feel better, I once liked bikes before I started working in a bike shop.
Lindsey Leigh Phillips 3 years ago
This is why i never became a chef, and only occasionally do landscaping work. Interestingly enough, i still enjoy house painting. I chalk that up to the decent pay, though.
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AMaureen Dance 3 years ago
I was told in my annual Impact interview, that in five years, my enthusiasm had waned. If I'd known it would be my last season, I'd have told him, "You bust your hump for five years, while watching the slackers get all the rewards, and your enthusiasm will suffer, too, Yoshi"
BlahBlahBlackSheepah 3 years ago
Ya that 3% raise bought them 3% of my effort. If my work isn't appreciated with money it's not appreciated or valuable to them, so I'll just do the min like they want
#18
Mama Penguin 3 years ago
Question is how much later? And what sort of obstacles and corporate drama BS would I have to endure to get there?
TomĆ”Å” Michek 3 years ago
People constantly complaining about starting with lower wage while complaing about not getting a pay raise seem like idiots to me...
Michael Lederman 3 years ago
No problem, however by later the job will no doubt no longer need filling.
#19
Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago
Having meetings. Period. (At least 99% of the time.)
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Kimberly Brewer 3 years ago
This is essentially 90% of meetings. I agree.
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Tonk Terrier 3 years ago
Used to have a colleague who had "meetings" at 4.30 on Fridays...no one would speak. Finally one time I suggested the meeting would run just fine without our involvement and we all got up and left. Not. A. Word
Tara Curry 3 years ago
Asking a question that's already been answered because you weren't paying attention
Erich Walz 3 years ago
Once had a manager schedule a meeting at 4:15 on the Friday before a 3 day weekend. I asked him why 4:15. He said that scheduling it at 4:30 seemed wrong under the circumstances. WTF? Oh, and the 30 minute meeting ended up taking an hour.
Daniel Engler 3 years ago
In Germany its Freitag the direct translation would be Freeday - we have to take this opportunity.
Origami Chik3n 3 years ago
I'll do you one better. I worked at an international company with main office in Sweden. We are 1 hour ahead of Sweden. They used to book most meetings at 4PM. Stockholm time.
Luckily, memes about corporate life have a way of helping workers unwind from the daily stress. The creator of MentalDrive told us that these jokes mainly serve two purposes. “They often connect us in a humorous way to the not so humorous situations we may find ourselves in at work. They are a way of both acknowledging the difficulties we may be having at work and pointing out the absurdity of them in a funny way.”
He added that they can “validate our frustrations and irritations but at the same time put them into perspective by lowering the negative emotional intensity. In this way, they can at times help us to communicate our frustrations or desire for change at work.”
#20
Raven Sheridan 3 years ago
Ah yes, North Korean Generals. The only country, whose military leaders, can be defeated with magnets. š¤
#21
Evi Grimes 3 years ago
I disagree, that's baby cheetah level cuteness. Cats > Yoda
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Tarhes ~ 3 years ago
People at that level seldom add value. You were brought in because they don't have a clue but you do.
Bayou Billy 3 years ago
Less than seldom with the last forty years of unbridled nepotism since 81... It's been a pathetic jaunt...
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Anthony Ly 3 years ago
You're more valuable to the functions of the company than all those corporate managers combined.
#22
Raven Sheridan 3 years ago
Translation: We expect you to do the work of three employees, for the pay of one.
Mama Penguin 3 years ago
You will be hit with an avalanche of work with unreasonable deadlines
kayla Mckee 3 years ago
Toxic, short staffed, and they will make you run 5 machines then find a reason to fire you after your shoulder injury incurred on the job heals.
Christian Cartmale 3 years ago
Means they won't train you, you have to figure it out yourself.
Ellen Tannenbaum 3 years ago
Those that say āflexible hoursā donāt mean the employee gets to pick their hours.
Laura Capshaw 3 years ago
And "Flexible schedule" means they schedule you when they want. Heaven forbid you ask THEM to be flexible.
After all, everyone strives to find at least some amount of joy in their work. One way to do that is to put that work into perspective. Klapow told us that our jobs are the place where we spend the majority of our days. “Even if the pay is good, you have to constantly be checking to see if the pay is justifying the emotional impact,” he noted.
“Money alone will not buy happiness at work. Having friends, a social connection, a purpose for why you are doing your job, [meaning] from the work. These are all the paths to happiness at work. If they are not there, it is time to consider changing your job description or possibly moving on,” Klapow concluded.
#23
Carl Reichart 3 years ago
When I quit my last job to retire, because I couldn't take it anymore, I told HR I spent 1/2 to 2/3's of my day on phone calls. Not answering emails, not answering phone calls, listening to chortles and giggles and Ummmms and Ahhhhhh's and inside jokes and comments that no one understood.
Random Anon 3 years ago (edited)
There are a quite a few like this. But you better be listening or miss a bomb thrown your way and have it blow up in your face later.
#24
Xottel 3 years ago
I am a somewhat experienced videotechnician and aced the interview only to now get called and tell people that earn 5x my salary that they pressed the wrong button on the remote.
Bayou Billy 3 years ago
iT is so mad at our idiots they send them to me first. On the basis we talk about custom computing(gaming) and imminorly into coding for mods for games. They say theprice for their friendship and their advice/opinions is dropping the morons on me. It's always the on/off button....
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Random Anon 3 years ago
Most of the technical interview I've been on was a breeze compared to the fire fighting, bullet dodging and back stabbing involved in the actual work lol. If the job feels like the above, you can thank the heavens your tech lead dealt with all the sh!t thrown your teams' way. These days I'm on a balanced approach to my devs. I still wear the bright red target on my back but the sh!t is shared around a bit so everyone knows it's a f*****g warzone.
#25
Earl Grey 3 years ago (edited)
The company I used to work for put out an āanonymousā internal survey, which naturally got some honest and unfiltered responses. Everybody was happy with having said what they really wanted to say until the IT guys pointed out that the date-time stamp on the survey submission could be matched to a POST transaction time stamp in the HTTP server log, which would also reveal the source internal IP address of your workstation.
Yep it's Ella šŗš¦ 3 years ago (edited)
An "anonymous" bullying survey from school - First question is "What is your Age, Name and Gender?"
Nicole Krenzler 3 years ago (edited)
I once even had my supervisor watch me fill it out because 'I might not know what some of questions really asking'. At another job, I was left alone and finished it really quickly, yet with at least a proper amount of thought, and my supervisor commented on my speed. I think I scored an own goal though, as I could have sat there 2-3 times as long on company time as I did, without suspicion, since most were taking that kind of time.
Catherine Spencer-Mills 3 years ago
Had one of those. HR showed up to discuss later. She was shocked - shocked! - that we could identify each other's comments. Only 5 people in the department and we had heard each other say the same stuff multiple times a week - sometimes in a day.
#26
Uber Mensch 3 years ago
I claim I'm just visualizing whatever it is they're talking about.
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Matthew Tabor 1 year ago
This was me during our unpaid 9am online trainings, when my shift didn't start until 2pm.
Miss.Informationš¤ 3 years ago
I can see it clear as day, like a movie, on the back of My eyelids!
Julie MommaWolf 3 years ago
Iām an OJT coach. We we have been doing it through WEBX. (next month we FINALLY go back onsite). Every class we catch someone sleeping
#27
Misty Mills 3 years ago
I wanna watch the world burnnnnn i got the gasoline i wanna watch the world burn and everyone get mean
Load More Replies... Nicole Krenzler 3 years ago (edited)
I had this. Co-worker said he smelled hydraulic fluid by the cardboard compactor. I mentioned it to my supervisor and perhaps even the store manager that the compacter needed to be looked at. It took a couple months, but sure enough, the compacter stopped working. The store had to pay for a more expensive repair to get it fixed, plus rent a large dumpster for all the cardboard our grocery store generated. It took at least a couple weeks or more to get some one out to fix it. No ability to watch Rome burn; my team had the largest amount of cardboard to take outside to the dump.
Lisa Delgado 1 year ago
This is exactly what's happening to me right now. I've been warning them for a year now and no one listened.
MichaÅ Osiecki 1 year ago
I really like that moment, you just keep on proving to them you have been telling them, and they are F-ed
#28
Eliza May 3 years ago
For 2 years, doing my job and the job of the senior clerk with all the experience who bullied me, but also who retired. I finally had a stroke from the stress, now on permanent CPP disability and in the process of sueing my employer Blue Cross LTD who refused to pay. DO NOT PUT UP WITH LONG-TERM SHORT STAFFING!!!
Bayou Billy 3 years ago
My friend is going through this. I am her surprise witness heh. As you can tell I couldn't care less about my "job" been documenting everything they've violated for six years... Dropping it on the court heh ...
Load More Replies... Maria C 3 years ago
Worked at a summer camp. It's hard work, but fun. Or it should be. By the end of the summer it was me, one other counselor and my idiot of a boss left for 80 kids. Boss wouldn't even let me use the bathroom bc "we're understaffed, I need you here" while she left multiple times to do "boss things". Never again.
John Crandall 3 years ago
If u can do it with 6 people, you can make due with 5. If you can make due with 5 you can work it out with 4. Etc., Etc. Experienced with the Army. Saw it run to extremes at Target. See it go farther with the greatest indifference in the federal service. Funny that some factories and FedEx gave you as little as they could while making sure u could excel, unlike the first three.
Bayou Billy 3 years ago
Omg the army is the worst for this ... Three of you can manage this 25 square kilometres right?
Load More Replies... Lakota Wolf 3 years ago
I canāt raise my hand. Iām too exhausted from working double the workload and extra hours to raise a hand.
Priscilla Wagner 3 years ago
I literally collapsed at work and no one called 911. I sat there for an hour. I'd developed a heart condition from stress bcuz I was doing the workload of 2 ppl for 4 yrs. It's not worth it!!
#29
Jacob Nunez 3 years ago
Wow a Lamborghini Centenario. Probably a car that is as over priced as crystals. And you can save like 110,000 buying a Dodge Hellcat.
Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago (edited)
No. If your business received hundreds of thousandsā-or millionsā-in Federal Pandemic relief money and, instead of improving working conditions and maybe passing a nice bonus from it on to your employees, you pocketed it for yourself and youāre buying yourself some expensive new toys with it. F*****g A*****e that you are. (Think it didnāt happen? Just check the timing between money received, nothing coming to employees, and the bossā new car, truck, house, boat, etc, etc, etc. Then do that math, baby!)
Bayou Billy 3 years ago
And he brags about it. The sadder part of people like him and musk is they know better. They've both been on the other end and mistreated. When allowed to do it themselves. Instead of being like Buffet or Gates and improving the workers lot ... They double down on all the bad stuff done to them and do it to their workers. I'm honestly ashamed of anyone who buys anything from Amazon. Is slavery worth delivery and 3% off(and probably getting a defective delivery abused by courier...). Smh
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Debbie West 3 years ago
That literally happened to me at a private company I worked at once...my boss and owner of the company once drove into work one after noon to show us the new custom car he'd ordered for his new collection: a Maserati made by the same people that sold to Nicolas Cage. My fellow low wage worker looked at it and had to act excited for him....Owner paid us dirt wages, naturally. Owner's teenage son said that in their evenings after work his parents would sit in their respective recliners and make fun of our low-class cars...
Linda Phipps 1 year ago
Someone posted a luxe car on his page, and I commented, "nice your friend let you stand in front of his car".
#30
Heather Taylor 3 years ago
My husband just got a pay raise.. which bumped us juuuust enough up in the tax bracket to pay WAY more, which effectively caused a major hit and we make less mow, but he has far more responsibilities . Meanwhile Besos and Trump and Musk out here paying zero down and zero percent every single year on taxes.
Julie MommaWolf 3 years ago
I know the pain. My last pay raise caused my to bring home less per week. I asked if they could take it back
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Fitz_N_Fartz 3 years ago
Company announces profits across the board, company announces I am being made redundant. It would be laughable if it was not true.... 80 days and counting...
Christian Cartmale 3 years ago
That's just the inflation that our governments are comfortable stating. If housing has doubled in 2 years, food is up 10+%, fuels are all up 30 or more percent... How do you figure everything is just 7.5 lol. Even my car would cost 10 percent more now than it did 3 years ago.
Alicia GriffonLady 3 years ago
Pfff. I worked as a CNA for nearly a decade and everywhere i went had a pay freeze and had you sign papers stating you would be fired if you talked about how much you were getting paid.
NotCoffee 3 years ago
Those papers were very probably ILLEGAL - this is a protected right at the federal level for any company overseen by NRLB. The company can prohibit it while on the clock only if they also prohibit all other non-work communication at the same time. If you can ask about the personās weekend, though, you can ask about their wages.
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Lea Ann Panek 3 years ago
We were told all the reasons why we are not getting any raise. Especially funny since we are only paid 70% of what we should be. (Public university). The following day was an email about the consultant and design firm hired to redesign the logo since it has been deemed "dated ".
Miz Chelle 3 years ago
A 3% raise?!?!?!? What I wouldn't give for one of those and I work for one of the largest health insurance companies in the world!!!
#31
Marita Berndt 3 years ago
Completely. That goes for phone calls, as well.
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Yssa Stewart-Severson 3 years ago
I.. am ashamed to admit that this is me more often than not.
Paulina Wu 3 years ago
I was not conscious I dreamed about using this phrase at the end of every email.
Lazy Panda 3 years ago
This one is so true I feel anxiety just reading it! Like I do about all those emails. And even worse the phone calls!
#32
Myles Kapson 3 years ago
at 65 years old an interviewer once stated; If i hire you, Iām going to need a 5 year commitment. i replied, ā do you really think iāve got 5 years left? ( he laughed, i got the job and beat the odds)
Agentblackbetty 3 years ago
I always hated that question, and always replied, hopefully alive.
Karen Scheltema 3 years ago
Have any of us ever guessed the answer to that question correctly?
Isaac Harvey 3 years ago
Small steps. Day by day. Medium steps. Week by week. Big steps. Month by month. Bigger steps. Year by year...
Celtic Pirate Queen 3 years ago
I once answered this question with, "On a tropical beach somewhere after having just sold my first novel, but then I have a great imagination." I actually got the job.
Jill Thomson 3 years ago
The last time I was asked that I said retired. Boss just said oh. Ok.
#33
Falcon 3 years ago
The bad part about "they don't pay me enough to care" is, that if you start thinking like that, your quality will go down. Noticed that in my line of work.
David Henry 3 years ago
It's called "reducing your work quality until it matches your pay"
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Priscilla Wagner 3 years ago (edited)
Manager once asked me why I wasn't helping someone else with their workload. I reminded them that there was supposed to be two ppl in my department and I was working the whole department myself. They just gave me a blank stare
Keisha 3 years ago
I used to work for Fruit Of The Loom as an inspector.We made t-shirts and you got paid by bundle.Each bundle had 36 shirts.If any of the people who sewed or inspected made 100% productivity or lower you got written up. To low and you were fired.150% was considered the gold standard but you could skate by at 125%. I never could understand those percentages l but we had amazing benefits,vacation time, maternity leave and best of all pay. But they closed up shop in the US moved to China and pay their employees nothing and that's why the quality of the items sucks now.
John Hopper 3 years ago (edited)
BP? With commercialisation, all I can think of is British Petroleum!
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Muza RĆØgne 3 years ago
It may have escaped me once or twice in the classroom "okay kids I'm not paid enough to put up with your BS - we're going to do [this}"
#34
Jason Mills 3 years ago
Google Dupont Schedule, you get everything from 1 day off to 7 days off.
Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago
Hell to the NO. Iāve seen the DuPont Schedule. You have to work some weird f*****g shifts, and long stretches with zero days off to get to the week off. Totally f***s up your Circadian Rhythm and you end up exhausted all the time. Give me set hours and days off any damn time.
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Nicole Krenzler 3 years ago (edited)
In order to accommodate people who couldn't come to city hall in person because they were at work during city hall's business hours, they stayed open until 8 pm one day per week. Now, they couldn't open late, so those extra hours were given as a paid day off every other week. This was a smaller city in BC, though.
Jack Reinhart 3 years ago
Genesee County courthouse hours are M-T, 8-3 or 9-3, depending on the office. THAT is some s**t!
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Jack Reinhart 3 years ago (edited)
GM truck plant, 6 days a week, going on four years in a row.
#35
Alicia M 3 years ago
There is a way to do this. Pivot your weight to the balls of your feet and don't let your heel touch down. It's the only way you come out of this intact. š¤£
Eddsworld_Encanto 3 years ago
This photo is how close i am to passing out cause im so flipping tired
Taylor Carroll 3 years ago
Plot twist, its an exhibit and the shoes are permanently attached to the grill :D idk
Skylar Jaxx 3 years ago
Anxiety through the roof thinking of the fall, the twisted/ broken ankle/leg the emotional damage. Brave woman here.
#36
Adam Chang 3 years ago
Swedish politician (m32) : "I have been working with that man for 20 years...."
Don Williams 3 years ago
In Boston, members of the Longshoreman's union were putting their kids on the rolls just after birth. That way, when they turned 18, they would have 18 years of seniority.
Load More Replies... MarmotArchivist 3 years ago
This baby is a bit late to the game, most have already start this process in the womb.
Amy Doyle 3 years ago
I know basically all jobs require experience but how do you get experience when you need experience to get it. š
Catherine Spencer-Mills 3 years ago
It was the year 2000. Actual job posting - must have 5 years experience with Windows 2000. Didn't both applying. Who wants to work for someone that stupid?
Karen Scheltema 3 years ago
Or 10 years experience with a product that has only been around for 5 years.
Jennifer Briggeman 3 years ago
That the bs of it all. The jobs want experience, but you canāt get the experience to be able to get that jobā¦vicious circle of dumb.
Hugo Raible 3 years ago
Or they want 7 years of experience of a framework which the candidate had invented 4 years ago.
#37
Kathryn Baylis 3 years ago
And when I feel like Iām going to pass out, I eat a little piece of cheese.
Load More Replies... David Force 3 years ago
Pam in The Office waiting for Jim to tell her how he is going to prank Dwight.
AngelWingsYT 3 years ago
Co-workers n i all trash talk one of the girls that quit xD no one liked her at all
Magna Linnevers 3 years ago
Covidā¦ GIFs on my personal phone during endless Zoom meetingsā¦
madbakes 3 years ago
Ooh, if that's on a work computer, I'd stop. I've seen several people fired for things they've said on work IM
Load More Replies... #38
Chrysalis Cam 3 years ago
And confirm you actually attached the attachment.
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D00FINSHMERTZ 3 years ago
Same! I believe it reads even better after there is no turning back.
Kevin Felton 3 years ago
Our server is so slow you have to check the sent box before logging off just to make sure it went out.
#39
Dave Hinckley 3 years ago
I make it a point to wait until February to say, "It's been a long year."
Darla Taylor 3 years ago
I was like that Saturday nights at the time clock just beginning my shift
Debbie Burton 3 years ago
Yep... me today. On a Tuesday. AFTER a long weekend. And only worked 3 hrs.... long week
#40
MarmotArchivist 3 years ago
Does my 7 seconds have to have an introduction, body paragraphs and a conclusion or can I freestyle them?
Bexx šŗš¦šŗš¦šŗš¦ 3 years ago
First sentence of the first 3 - freestyle the rest (Idk let me know how it goes? Not involved!)
Load More Replies... PandaRave 3 years ago
Being compact and efficient is more impressive than writing five paragraphs desperately explaining your point. I wish school taught you that earlier
JayCee 3 years ago (edited)
Academic writing is different from professional writing. You're talking about 2 totally different genres. Emails are meant to be quick and informative. Essays are meant to be in-depth analyses and/or complex arguments. The lack of understanding surrounding composition and rhetoric is one reason so many fall prey to fake news and corrupt politicians.
Winter Eleven 3 years ago
My professors: if it's more than one page long imma not gonna read it
#41
Keisha 3 years ago
Definitely not me I'm one of those that does it as quickly as possible so then I don't have to worry about it. My brain doesn't allow me the freedom of procrastinating.
Gwen Johnson 3 years ago
Worked with people who spent hours complaining about all the work they had to do...call it overwhelmed
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Mama Penguin 3 years ago
No, Heather. Just no. Don't make it more depressing than it already is.
Raven Sheridan 3 years ago
If can work in my pajamas and have my cat with me, I'll call it whatever you want.
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Tim Douglass 3 years ago
Had this sign in my office back in the '80s. Some things never change.
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Alisha Rughubar 3 years ago
It always happens just after you think you're going in the right direction
Pandasanne 3 years ago
I just added a 3 min delay to all my outgoing emails.. best thing I ever did!!
#51
Monic Krugell 3 years ago
lol - it's funny because it's true. if I don't reply immediately it means I am still thinking of how to respond.
#52
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David Henry 3 years ago
In the end, every single one of us keeps banking on the, "Hey, I might die before then!" and that tells you the exact temperature of the flames covering the world.
Load More Replies... Monic Krugell 3 years ago
every week - 'I am too busy - will diarize for Friday' - comes Friday - 'This seems like a Monday problem to me'
#55
Lorna Anne Skinner Emmons 3 years ago
A good uplift to mood. Worth a smile. I have co-workers like that
#56
Adrian 3 years ago
Sadly, very few people online seem to care. I see the plural and possessive confused all the time and I get shot down if I point it out. Let's eat grandma - punctuation saves lives.
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chuck.dont.surf 3 years ago
Says the person who threw a party on a private island in the middle of a pandemic...
#57
Amanda Cline 3 years ago
Me when streaming. I could rock a game but the minute someone tunes in, I get f*cked. š
#58
Alisha Rughubar 3 years ago
1 year later??? more like 3 months later, especially in a toxic environment
#59
#61
Briana Burton 3 years ago
No at school you don't want to risk getting expelled b/c u have to go to rt fisher
#62
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Lakota Wolf 3 years ago
Of course, with todayās gas prices, even āto workā is unaffordableā¦ (other than WFH)
#65
Steven Bennett 3 years ago
Weird Al Yankovic has a song called "Mission Statement" which sounds exactly like something by Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young but which is actually just 4 1/2 minutes of meaningless corporate jargon strung together. One of my favorites!
Lorna Anne Skinner Emmons 3 years ago
In proper peon it translates to : Let's push our employees to work harder, make the ones who are the hardest workers work even more, and cut hours
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David Henry 3 years ago
True but at least corporate can't hurt her anymore.
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Mama Penguin 3 years ago
Brain: Welp. Guess this is the day I get fired for taking extra 5 minutes at lunch yesterday.
#71
David Henry 3 years ago
I'm out here begging guys for scraps and meanwhile other ppl getting dik on linkedin. š
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#72
James016 3 years ago
That's pretty much it when one of us goes on holiday as generally something brown will hit the spinny thing.
Lakota Wolf 3 years ago
I do this at home before I go anywhere that is more than 5 minutes away, as Iām the only tech-savvy person in my family and I will inevitably be called to āfix the computersā at the family business, even though I havenāt officially worked there in 3+ years. Of course, 99.99999% of the time the problem is (ahem) user error or something Iāve already explained how to easily fix 9,999 times.
#73
Isaac Harvey 3 years ago
I seriously donāt get why NFTs are so popular nowadaysā¦ theyāre just images with implied price tags. And screenshots and/or right-click-saving could be used to simply steal their value in an instant.
Hugo Raible 3 years ago
It's like pictures in a museum. Everybody can view them, but people still pay for "just images" to be their owners.
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Emma Cliff 3 years ago
Non-Fungible Token. It's a form of cryptocurrency asset. Like digital artwork but each time it is sold the artist gets a cut of the profit for being the creator. It became a kind of meme though especially when kids literally started selling their NFTs for millions š
Load More Replies... #74
David Henry 3 years ago
Oh I'd fix that FAST. Every 8PM email will be answered in 1h 59m. Then some follow up questions set to go out at 3AM, with an "oops there was an error in that last email" sent to go out at 4.
Tim Douglass 3 years ago
Boss ignores all of them until 9 AM then checks the time stamps to make sure you replied to them on time. No requirement for them to respond in any particular time frame.
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David Henry 3 years ago (edited)
Yes you will. They'll be all over FB complaining nobody wants to work anymore.
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#83
Lakota Wolf 3 years ago
I live in Southern California where itās currently sunny past 7pmā¦ crap XD
Bill Fuhrmann 3 years ago
The northern states are more variable. Can be 9pm around here. Glad we are not in Alaska or Iceland, 24/7
Load More Replies... #84
Lakota Wolf 3 years ago (edited)
Found a co-worker crying in the dairy cooler at work once. Like full-on sobbing so loud and hard that I could hear him outside of the thick cooler doors. I honestly thought heād just gotten a call that one of his parents or his gf were hurt or dead. I went in and asked if he was okay. He said āNOā, so I sat near him and asked if I could help. He told me to just sit with him for a bit. I did, and he sobbed for a bit longer and then yelled āNOW GET AWAY FROM MEā. I donāt comfort co-workers any more. (Kid was 18 and it turns out the whole reason why he was crying is that his gf wasnāt coming home for the first holiday break during her first semester of college.)
Mommy 747 3 years ago
I still think you did the right thing.he really sounds like a kid that needed someone. You helped him exactly the way he wanted you to. He was young and just needed to work on expressing himself and was probably really embarrassed. Sometimes people aren't taught the best way to cope with their emotions especially if they experience them more intense than other people. Not to go on diagnosing anyone here but, just saying. Communication is the hardest piece and you showed compassion and that was great
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#87
Timmy Pillinger 3 years ago
Make friends with it. Find someone who has been given an elephant of the opposite sex by a perverse job interviewer and produce further elephants. Re instate exƩcution by elephant for asking bizarre questions in a job application.
Kimi Tomminello 3 years ago
I think they'd hire you on the spot for that one. Or kick you out and try to place a restraining order š¤£ thank you for this.
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Christina 3 years ago
That was my first thought. Can't give it away it sell it ... It's going to die anyway because I know nothing about caring for elephants. Besides, it would totally melt the brain of whatever idiot put that question on the application.
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LuckyL 3 years ago
And now I wonder, what I would do with it. Ride it to work? Let it live in my garden - but what do I do with the poo? What do you do with an elefant? Rent it to a zoo, or is that giving it away?
#89
Random Anon 3 years ago
Also be wary of people with a long string of "titles" behind their names.
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Mama Penguin 3 years ago
This is strangely motivating. Anybody else read it in Bobby Hill's voice?
#97
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Isabel Feehan 3 years ago
I am so glad that I do not have a real job (babysitting does not really count as a job).
Isabel Feehan 3 years ago
I am so glad that I do not have a real job (babysitting does not really count as a job).
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