30 “Very British Problems”, As Shared By This Twitter Account

This isn’t the first time we’ve featured Very British Problems on Bored Panda before because we just can’t seem to get enough! The last time we spoke to Rob Temple, the creator of the page, was about 5 months ago, but he’s been running VBP much longer than that. “I've been chronicling the oddball behavior of Brits now for exactly 10 years, having started Very British Problems in December 2012,” he told Bored Panda. 

“Thankfully, as the rest of the world will have noticed, we Brits don't half get ourselves in a lot of pickles, so I can't ever imagine a time when I'll run out of material. Which is good, in a way.” Very British Problems isn’t ever going to run out of fans either, as his Twitter account has amassed 3.9 million followers over the past decade, his Facebook page has a whopping 886k followers, and his Instagram has over 630k followers.  

I asked Rob about the British problems that have been plaguing him recently, and he shared, “Christmas is a time of many, many British problems. We're never ready for it, we eat far too many individually wrapped chocolates, we have cheese in the fridge we're not allowed to touch until Christmas Eve, and we can't find the end of the sellotape.”

And when it comes to why Brits love to spill their qualms on Twitter, Rob says, “I definitely think it's a good vent for British people to be able to moan on social media. It saves us talking to our friends, or heaven forbid our neighbors, about our problems. We like to say we're ‘fine, thanks’ whenever we're asked how we are, but we're not fine. We're tired or confused or livid but never fine.”

Rob also has big plans for the future of Very British Problems. “Maybe a theme park where there's no rides, just queues. And where it's always raining.” Sounds lovely…

But until that theme park comes about, we can settle for purchasing the books, greeting cards and merch on the Very British Problems website right here! And if you’re still looking for a great Christmas gift, be sure to check out the Very British Problems Quiz Book! It has over 600 very British questions for the whole family, and you can find it right here!  

To gain even more insight on British problems, we also reached out to blogger and Brit Fran Taylor, the woman behind Whinge, Whinge Wine. (I’ll be honest, as a non-Brit I had to Google the word ‘whinge’. Turns out it means complaining persistently!) We wanted to hear Fran’s thoughts on British problems and what she considers a quintessential VBP. “In general, we hate small talk and are bad at it,” she told Bored Panda.

“‘How are you’ isn’t actually a question. They don't care, really, and just want to either hear a ‘I'm fine, thanks, how are you?’ or alternatively have a chance to vent about themselves for a bit. If someone actually started to talk about how they were, it would be deeply awkward.” This is something I’ve heard non-native speakers complain about before, but unfortunately, I can’t explain it… It's just one of those mysteries of life.

“When we don’t correct someone out of politeness, then we have to live with it for the rest of our lives because it’s too embarrassing to admit that you didn’t say something the first time,” Fran added. “Which is why my neighbor still thinks I’m called Fern, and why I get owl themed presents for every birthday and Christmas.”

“If someone compliments our outfit, it’s physically impossible not to immediately tell them where we got it from AND how little it cost - and then point out any flaws and tell them how you look awful,” Fran shared. “We're a self-deprecating bunch.”

And when it comes to British horrors, Fran notes that running out of milk for tea has to be high up on the list. “You think it’s a stereotype but it’s literally my life, right now.”

I was also curious if Brits ever complain about their problems in person or if their politeness trumps their urge to rant. “Oh of COURSE we complain - to our friends in group chats, or on social media,” Fran shared. “All British Twitter is, is people moaning about our rubbish government, their bins not being emptied and the supermarket being out of eggs.”

“However with strangers, face to face, there is only one topic we are allowed to complain about without fear of offense, and that is, of course, the weather and how entirely unprepared for it we are.” Good to know complaining about the weather is universal; it seems to be the one thing that unites us all.

When asked how British humor differs from humor in other parts of the world, Fran swiftly informed me that the first difference is that Brits spell the word properly: with a “U”. So I’ll let her keep the “u”s, just this once! “British humour is dryer than a dry gin in the middle of the desert while listening to Donald Trump talk about his sex life,” Fran shared. “Lots of people don’t understand that when we say something, there’s at least a 50% chance we’re being sarcastic and in fact mean the opposite. ‘Bit chilly out there today? Oh, really, I was just thinking of getting my bikini on!’”

British people are an enigma. They are extremely polite when it comes to social etiquette, but they’ll also casually use words that many Americans would never dare say. “We are generally more free with swearing - and not just the little swear words,” Fran added. “The C-word can even be a term of endearment among friends (this is particularly true in Scotland, so I’m told) - every morning my group chat kicks off with ‘Hi c***s’ or ‘Hi slags’. Twitter certainly doesn’t understand that, which is why I have to get new accounts so often.”

“If we are really overly polite to you, it probably means we hate you, and if we say something that seems absurd - even if we are entirely deadpan - we’re probably messing with you,” Fran explained.

So what I’m getting from this is that if a British person starts making fun of you, or shall I say “taking the piss”?, it’s a sign that they actually like you.

If you’d like to hear more from Fran and keep up with her adventures, be sure to visit her blog Whinge, Whinge Wine right here, and you can follow her on Twitter and Facebook right here and here!

Can you relate to these very British problems, or are you feeling like you would never fit in in the UK? Either way, we hope you’re enjoying these hilarious tweets. Let us know in the comments any other VBPs you encounter often, and then if you’re interested in diving even deeper into the world of Very British Problems, don’t forget to check out our last article featuring Rob’s Twitter account right here!