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Millennials Nearing Their 40s That Have Made Mistakes Share 25 Of The Most Regretful Ones In This Online Group
Article created by: Monika Pašukonytė
Life can be confusing, even hard at times, and not many of us can proudly say that we've managed to figure it out. We're born into this world not knowing anything, and it takes us some time to master the most basic tasks. We're constantly learning and adapting – which naturally leads to a bunch of little slip-ups.
The wonderful thing about mistakes is that everybody makes them; your mother, your next-door neighbor and even the Queen of England. What's important is that we learn a lesson and acknowledge it every time something decides to go wrong.
"Millennials of Reddit now nearing your 40s, what were your biggest mistakes at this point in life?" An online user decided to take it to one of Reddit's famous communities to ask 1981 – 1996 babies about the life regrets they have. The post received over 2.6K upvotes and 2.2K worth of comments discussing the harsh reality of our existence.
More info: Reddit
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#1
Not Saving Up
If I could tell my 18 year old self one thing, it would be to save 10% of every paycheck I ever got.
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#2
Settling Down Way Too Early
Getting married at 20 and having kids shortly after. A LOT of people warned me that I was starting too young, but I thought I was the exception. I spent my whole life being told by everyone that I was "mature" for my age. So certainly I wouldn't be a statistic!
After years of marriage collapsed into horrible divorce, I realized I wasn't the exception. It's not that my love and desires weren't real, they absolutely were! It's not that I couldn't hack the practical day-to-day tasks of family life, I managed that quite well. The problem is that I was not prepared for how much my partner and I would change as humans in our early 20's. 20 year old me had way more in common with the 15 year old me than the 35 year old me.
If you are under 24(ish) and thinking about marriage, do yourself a favor and wait another year or two. If this is truly the perfect match for the two of you, then you have nothing to lose - that person will still be there. But if you are wrong, and your underdeveloped brain hasn't caught on quite yet, then you will be grateful you waited just a little bit longer.
#3
Staying Too Long At A Job Because It Was Safe
Staying too long at a job in my 20s, just because it was safe and easy. When I finally got the motivation to leave, ended up with an almost 50% pay boost.
#4
Not Living Life To The Fullest
40 already. Born in 81 so I think I just make the millennial cut.
Work to live, don’t live to work.
You have half your working life after you turn 40 but only 20-25 years to really live it up before the responsibilities become heavy and your joints start to ache. Live life. Really LIVE it. Experience as much you can. Every sensation, sight, sound, touch. Be open. Be brave. Live your first few decades in the fast lane. You have the rest of your life to take it easy, when you have no choice.
#6
Not Taking Care Of Their Back
Take care of your f**king back. Lift with your knees. Sure it's rad when you grab a fridge by yourself and lift it in the back of a moving truck unaided, but one day that s**t is going to have consequences that won't just magically go away by resting and "taking it easy" for a week.
#7
Not Spending Enough Time With Their Dad
I wish I spent more time with my dad while I had the chance
#8
Worrying About Running Out Of Time
I'm not sure if people have experienced the same but when I entered my 30s I became convinced I was rapidly running out of time. Rather than using that as motivation I let it paralyze me with indecision because I "couldn't afford to make the wrong choice." Consequently, I'm now 39 and, though I've had great things happen in my 30s, I regret spending so much time worrying and so little time committing to a course of action.
#10
Staying Too Long In An Unhappy Marriage
Staying too long in an unhappy marriage. I lost the last half of my 20s and most of my 30s because of it.
#11
Not Listening To Their Body
Try not to get cancer.
If you feel unwell go to the dr.
I felt numbness in my fingers and toes. . Let that go for a few months. It turned to arm Pain. Went to the hospital and it turns out I have stage 4 renal carcinoma.
Don’t let any symptoms go unchecked. You’re older, and if your body is telling you something is wrong f**king listen to it.
#12
Not Buying A House
Should have bought a home. We qualified 20 years ago for enough to buy a small 2 bedroom but I didn't think we could afford it. That 2 bedroom would be worth nearly 3Xs and paid off by now. We pay nearly double in rent what our mortgage would have been. Gotta love the SF bay area cost of living.
#13
Not Asking For More Pay
Always ask for more pay. Starting, yearly, before leaving, whatever. Get that money.
#15
Not Investing In Friendships And Relationships
I moved a lot as a kid and am what is called a third culture kid. I feel at home nowhere.
Because of this I also learnt to see friendships and relationships as transactional and didn't maintain them or invest in them.
Because my early life experience is different to those with stable childhoods, I am also really closed. I have learnt to assume I have relatively little in common with others, and no longer bother to even try.
I have effectively become a hermit, am largely friendless, and ended up sacrificing any chance of happiness to take care of an elderly relative.
It is probably too late for me.
#16
Missing Out On A Trip With Their Grandad
When I was 12-13 my grandfather and I talked about driving from Florida to Alaska over the summer after I got my drivers license.
By the time I got my license (17yo) I was too involved with being with my friends/girlfriend and working. Biggest regret if my life not doing that trip. I’m 37 now and think about it from time to time.
#17
Ignoring Red Flags In A Relationship
Not recognizing early red flags for an abusive relationship. It can be tempting to give yourself over to someone showering you with affection after a long dry spell but pay attention to some important details - how long have they known most of their friends? Are they asking you for money really early on, and for something that seems like they should be able to take care of? Bonus point if one or more of their friends brings up money they owe them too. Do your friends seem to like them? How quickly do they start trying to change things about you or make negative comments? I realized 3 months in that this wasn't a good relationship but stayed for another year just because it was comfortable and I wanted someone to be there, not because it was the right person. Fortunately, I was smart enough not to co-sign on anything. Once the wrong person is living with you it can be extremely difficult and stressful to get them out of your house without risking your own safety, especially if you have pets. It can be tempting to move in together quickly, but it's sometimes not worth the risk.
#19
Not Prioritising Themselves
Thinking that I could and should put myself on the back burner for anything and anyone else.
#21
Putting Things Off
Thinking that I have time to do everything I want only to find myself losing time, and the endless energy I used to have in order to purse them.
#22
Suffering From Depression
Wasted my life in deep depression; Still wasting it. Never finished college, never found a stable relationship and just gave up on finding a relationship. Lost the love of my life because of my depression
#23
Going To University And Majoring In Business
Going to university and majoring in business, numerous poor investments in now defunct companies and businesses and not taking care of my health while younger
#24
Not Holding Onto Their College Friends
When you get out of college, keep your friends. No matter how hard it is. Hold on to them.
#25
Selling Drugs While They Were In The Army
Selling drugs while I was in the Army. Got me thrown in prison for a couple years. Restarting life and missing a big chunk of your 20s isn't great. 0/10 do not recommend.
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