“What Is Your Unpopular Wedding Opinion?” (30 Answers)

No doubt about it. In such cases, it's about the wedding and not the marriage, I suspect. Why pay for a lavish wedding if you could use the money as a down payment for a house or something equally useful and long-lasting?

Many years ago I went to a phenomenal all out wedding. No expense was spared. The bride’s parents spent a fortune and the kids were divorced two years later.

I feel this isn’t unpopular. I’ve been to a lot of weddings and only one was truly above their means. I think those ones just stand out more.

Great way to start your divorce however.

Amen!

Worst one I've seen was a wedding speech where the groom read a letter from his relatives. 4 pages. In polish. He and his parents were the only polish speakers at the wedding

Agree. Unfortunately, many people like to hear themselves talk....

Speeches should also be like toast. Burning is not a requirement.

Partners older brothers wedding: Partners dad "thank you for coming", boom done. Bride had to take the microphone off her dad after 24mins, he was thanking people who weren't there, that the bride didn't know. It was 24mins of him listing and thanking basicall everyone he's ever met. He also has the most boring monotone voice.

It really depends on the speaker. Some speaches are really good, and makes you learn a bit more about the couple, and can stand to be long. However the majority is not, so I get where you come from.

Bridal showers and rehearsal dinners seem to be an American thing. At least, i've never heard of anyone doing those in the UK. Couples here tend to just have stag and hen nights (what we call bachelor and bachlorette parties) and then the wedding a few weeks later.

Cash grabs.

If you can afford it, I see this as an absolute win. It's just a fun time for everyone before the big day (hopefully if everyone stays in line, like no cheating.) and is a time for people friends to bond before one of them gets married. I think it's a cute idea, and I know many other cultures do have many pre wedding events.

Rehearsal dinner used to be just the people in the wedding and the parents having a meal after the rehearsal. Now it is treated like a pre-wedding reception where all the guests attend.

Why isn't this the norm?

Having one maid of honor might make sense, as you may need an extra hand for dealing with certain situations that might be problematic on you big day (e.g. handling a big dress) but having a whole bunch of them is just showing off, and is completely unnecessary. It should only be done if they feel left out/disapointed if you are not doing it.

It gets kind of full on, and then when there's drama over who gets picked... oh my god. I remember watching Say Yes to the Dress once, and there was a girl on there who apparently HAD to have her entire sorority in the bridal party, so it ended up being like 20 people and her church wasn't big enough to accommodate them all standing up at the front so she had to create this convoluted thing where some of them would stand with her and some would stand alongside the aisle to "light her way", and just listening to her explain it was EXHAUSTING. I can't imagine the pressure of feeling like you had to come up with a whole new wedding concept just to make sure nobody's feelings got hurt. Just ditch the bridesmaids altogether in that case.

when i was in college i was a videographer for a ton of weddings. Everything from the $$$$ being spent that even the Queen of England would be like "that's too much" to simple as simple can be. The happiest couples? always the simple weddings. I am having my best friend stand for me and that's it (I did for her wedding, and it was so simple with a ton of food and booze and lots of love and laughter) She spent less than 5k

It really depends on how you do it. My 2 best friends were my MOH and bridesmaid. My MOH's dress was like $30 and my bridesmaid made her dress. We had a fun pamper night the night before with my mom and that was it.

A wedding day should be about the bride and the groom, but sometimes people make it ALL about themselves, disregarding basic human decency and common sense...

It’s not always that easy. My father, grandparents & entire paternal side of family is in Netherlands, my mother & her parents in San Francisco, my five siblings & their families between New Zealand, Germany, Tamil Nadu, NYC & Atlanta, whilst I am in Hawaii. My husband’s family all East Coast US. Our wedding was always going to be a destination wedding with more than one reception. We opted to cover the costs for everyone to come to us, with a separate reception in Utrecht. Had we not been able to do this, there’s absolutely no way those closest to me/us, would have been able to attend. The assumption that weddings should be “local” is based on the premise most guests would be local.

And the ones who want to be there but can't? It's selfish. Not everyone can get off work. Not everyone is rich. Then they have to suffer with you will do it if you want to be my friend.

When my niece got married, they chose a destination wedding. My daughter, who was very close to her cousin, couldn't go; it would have taken a whole semester of expenses at school to go. I didn't go either for several other reasons. Apparently, only their parents went, plus a few friends.

This actually does make so much sense. This "gotta invite everyone" c**p is just stupid.

Wish someone had taught me this before my FIL's guests (that he insisted on inviting) made up half of our reception (that my partner and I paid for).

in my social circle, we didn't usually do sit-down dinners after the wedding - just some food and a mingle for a while before heading home. Much more reasonable I think.

When my youngest son got married, we asked if he was going to invite uncle L. Who's that? Yep, not invited and that was okay with everyone.

I let my maid of honor (my sister) wear a bridesmaid dress that she had worn to a previous wedding.

It is all about whether you can be confused to be the bride or not. If your dress looks nothing like a wedding dress, e.g. because it also includes a significant amount of another colour (e.g. has a white skirt combined with a colored top), I think you can pull it off. Same goes if you wear some sort of jacket and want to pair it with a white shirt. But just to be on the safe side, coordinate with the bride, she might be of a different opinion, which should be respected. Same things goes for black by the way. Don't look like you are going to a funeral, but a black cocktaildress with a sexy cut and some gold on it might fly (depending on the general style of the wedding (e.g. don't go into a catholic church dressed so provocatively)).

Honestly, I despise the white/off-white/pastel/cream/beige/pastels that the bride has been expected to wear in Western weddings. IF I ever got married, I'd wear either black (my favorite color) or very dark grey (my second favorite color) and let the guests wear whatever the hell they want. They could be barefoot if they wanted to, who cares?

When i was in my 20s, a wore a dress that had purple flowers on white. The flowers got increasinly thick until the hem was purple. I didnt really think of this as a " white dress".

Who cares about the color of a dress worn to a wedding also believes evolution is a hoax. As if the color of the brides dress has any meaning in times of Tinder and faking everything for social media. its not the color of a dress that wants to "steal" attention on "your" day. Its rhe annoying person wearing it and you not having the guts to not invite her.

In Germany, you have to do this. Standesamt is the only legal way to get married, the church ceremony is just to top it off.

Ots bone of anyones business

My son and his wife married a couple of months before their ceremony. They were going to use a GI loan and were required to be married before it would be approved and were worried they would miss out on what they considered their perfect starter home if they waited. They told very few people in order to avoid comments.

In the US, you have to get a corrupt state license and bring it to the church before they will marry you!

My dad died 5 years ago, so that would be a very bizarre dance. 😆