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“Ugh He’s A Ginger”: 50 Women Reveal Disgusting And Horrible Things Said To Them After Birth
Giving birth is no easy feat: it’s raw, exhausting, and life-changing all at once. But for some moms, the hardest part isn’t just the birth itself, it’s the bizarre things people feel the need to say afterward.
When someone on TikTok asked, “What’s the most unhinged thing someone said to you right after you gave birth?” moms did not hold back. The answers poured in, and they range from hilariously clueless to shockingly insensitive.
So if you’re curious about what not to say to a new mom or just need a laugh, keep reading. Some of these might make you cringe, others will make you chuckle, and all of them prove that sometimes people just really need to think before they speak.
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#1
While I was being sick post c- section and nurse came over to take my sick bowl and said “see I bet you’re regretting that section now, thinking it was the easy way out” no you mutant I didn’t think being sliced and diced was going to be easy. You also told me I needed one for 10 weeks because my baby was breach
Blondie23 4 months ago
Wow... I remember after my c-section the next day the nurse came to help me get cleaned up and she was so rough with me that I really felt like I was going to die. I got back to the bed and my mom and family where there and I was in such a bad mood. I remember my aunt walked up to me, after realizing what was going on, kissed me on the forehead and said "don't worry we understand" and she ushered everyone out of the room. Don't let anyone tell you a c-section is an easy way out.. because it's not!
RELATED:
#2
'how can you cope with such a fussy baby'....she was the easiest baby in the world, hardly ever cried, until she saw mil and she would loose her sh*t. shes not fussy, she just doesn't like you.
Vinnie 4 months ago (edited)
My baby nephew was adorable with me until the ripe old age of 3 months. After that, he was cranky whenever I visited. Meanwhile, everyone else said he was really cute. I was finally graced with his charm when he was 11 months. So that was 8 months of my being the common denominator and no clue why. 🙄
Melanie Filmer 4 months ago
One of my babies didn't like my SIL because she always wore too much perfume
#3
Not after birth, but during… I was pushing and a MALE doctor came into the room and told me to ‘quieten down and stop screaming’… sir, I’m pushing a baby out of my body
Niki 4 months ago
My mama told me it was like s******g a watermelon, so frankly, he can push off.
Earonn - 4 months ago
I hope the attending nurses chased him out and strangled him with the umbilical cord afterwards.
Jenny 4 months ago
This would depend on where in the world it happened and when. I gave birth (UK) to my first in 1987, and the rooms most definitely weren't soundproofed. I could hear the lady in the next room wailing and screaming. They moved me to intensive care soon after because I had eclampsia.
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Laura Gillette 4 months ago
One of the nurses told me to "stop thrashing" when I was having contractions. I wasn't thrashing. I was turning onto my side, gripping the hospital bed rails for dear life, and howling in agony. I was loud, but I guess I thought I was allowed to be loud during childbirth? Between contractions, I said, "I don't think I'm thrashing." She said, "Ok, maybe thrashing is the wrong word. But you don't need to scream. When you contract, just breathe through it." THANKS LADY, I'LL TRY NOT TO BE SO LOUD TO NOT ANNOY YOU WHILE I PREPARE TO PUSH A PERSON OUT OF ME.
While these posts highlight what you definitely shouldn’t say or do during childbirth, let’s flip the script and talk about what can actually help. When it comes to supporting a woman through pregnancy and labor, a little preparation and thoughtfulness can go a long way. From learning what to expect to offering practical help, every small step can make this huge life event smoother and less stressful for everyone involved.
Kenneth Baker, M.D., chair of obstetrics and gynecology for St. Peter's Health Partners in Albany, New York, explains, “The first step partners should take is to educate themselves on pregnancy and the changes that their partners will go through when they're pregnant.” In other words, don’t just wing it: take time to read, ask questions, and really understand what your partner is experiencing both physically and emotionally.
#4
I’ve had four babies. Epidural with the first two after 32 plus hours of being in labour and an emergency and planned caesarean with the next two and my ex said I’ve technically not given birth once and I was useless because I didn’t just do it without pain relief and I was a failure xx
Shortstuff 4 months ago
..,but she had 4 children with him. There shouldn't have been a 2nd.
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Pink kitty 4 months ago
How many babies did your ex give birth to? Zero? Well, tell him to stfu
Earonn - 4 months ago
Every man saying that should get a ananas shoved into his ar*se and his reaction made public, together with his face and what he said. I'm done with being nice to sexi*st cvnts.
KatSaidWhat 4 months ago
For UK - ananas is how a lot of the rest of the world say pineapple.
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Tonyah Mcanelly 4 months ago
I had a girl who has never experienced child birth tell me that c-sections are for lazy people and they are not real births. I was in labor for 12 hours my son was breach with a life threatening issue ( Gastroscisis ) C-section saved his life . a birth is a birth . C-sections are not for the faint of heart there is much more healing and alot of trauma to the body.
#6
I was 1 week postpartum, I was getting dressed when my ex came in, he looked at my stomach in pure disgust and said ‘is that always going to look like that?’
Pink kitty 4 months ago
I've still got a scar like the one in the picture. 10 years on, it has faded but still visible
At Least I'm Not You 4 months ago
I love my wife's body because she carried our children. It might not be what it was before our kids, but I have greater appreciation for what it went through and (again) I still love it. Besides, I'm not a looker to begin with, so I'm gonna continue to enjoy my luck that someone as beautiful and interesting as her is okay with whatever it is that I am -- which is like the amalgamated creature at the end of "The Substance."
Morning sickness, hormonal shifts, and all those doctor visits aren’t just “her thing”; they’re yours to learn about, too. Grab a few good books, watch videos, and definitely sign up for childbirth classes together. The more you know, the less overwhelming the delivery room will feel when the big day arrives.
Make it a point to attend as many prenatal appointments as you can. Even if you’re just there to hold her hand or listen to the doctor, your presence shows you’re all in this together. It also gives you the chance to ask any questions directly and get the facts straight from the pros.
#7
Midwife told me my baby looked jaundice during our 3 day stay in hospital after birth. I explained to her that his dad is Nigerian and the baby isn’t jaundice to which she told me there is a difference between jaundice and melatonin. I said sorry the sleep hormone?? And she said ‘no what gives your skin colour, melatonin.’ I said ‘i really think you mean melanin not melatonin’, she told me i was wrong and did jaundice test anyway. Baby was not jaundice.
Niki 4 months ago
I was told that my sons were jaundiced over and over again. My very Asian mom walked in and suddenly, "Oh, you're not entirely white! No, he's probably not jaundiced." ALL.THREE.TIMES.
Clown fish 4 months ago
They said my Aunties friends baby was jaundice. The conversation went Mrs Wong we think the baby may have jaundice so we need to do a test do you consent Mrs Wong? She said yes and the conversation continued to how the test would be done. Anyway Mr Wong came home in the middle of the conversation on how the test would be done. All of a sudden the midwife released Mr and Mrs Wong. Mrs might be very white British but the husband and farther was definitely Asian
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Nils Skirnir 4 months ago
Midwives, for all their skills, aren’t doctors and shouldn’t be giving medical advice to patients.
KatSaidWhat 4 months ago
They literally do a degree - it's not just learning how to tell how far along a baby is.
Load More Replies... #8
I had the most horrific birth, ended up having to have an episiotomy, massive loss of blood - horrendous. Anyway next day midwife came in to look at my scar and literally gasped in horror and jumped back “OH MY GOODNESS LOOK AT THAT HAEMORRHOID!!” I was mortified and said yes probably because I was pushing for two hours… So if that wasn’t bad enough she went out to get two other midwives to come in and have a look, also gasped and recoiled in horror. 😫 Wish I could’ve throat punched them when my legs came back
KatSaidWhat 4 months ago
Emotional trauma - I would report to a manager as this is highly inappropriate.
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
Any medical comment should be helpful, or at the very least, directed towards the patient's recovery or care. Definitely report.
Load More Replies... #9
I was bedridden the entire 9 months, couldn’t eat, hospitalised multiple times with Hyperemsis and lost partial vision in my left eye due to the stress on my body. 4 weeks pp I was asked if I jealous of the attention baby was getting as I was used to being “centre of attention”…. WTAF.
Taffy Renee 2 months ago
Now the question is "Is she an attention hog and won't admit it? Or not?"
Supporting a woman during labor isn’t a passive job; it’s one of the most important roles you’ll ever play. Learn the signs of labor ahead of time so you know what’s normal and when to head to the hospital. Her water might break, contractions will come in waves, and being prepared means you won’t be caught off guard when things ramp up fast.
#10
Midwife made a face and said ‘ugh he’s a ginger’ as if we don’t live in Scotland and myself and my partner have red tinges in our hair. She completely missed the huge port wine stain covering half his scalp. I’m a social worker and thankfully made sure it was noted before discharge.
Zoe Vokes 4 months ago
I assume they have to note the port wine stain so that in future visits doctors don’t notice the “new” mark and assume baby has been injured and the parents are either negligent or abúsive? It’s kind of important to write that down if it could potentially split up a family.
Wat Tyler's Revenge 3 months ago
Scot here also. Dad was constantly asked when mum was pregnant with me if he would prefer a girl or boy. He said it didn't matter as long as it was healthy, and didn't have red hair. God definitely has a sense of humour, and irony.
Angela Castro 2 months ago
Wow! When I discovered our grandson was a ginger, I was elated! I had dreamed of a redhead even though none of us have red hair, only hints of it.
#11
“Do you really need to eat that remember you need to lose the baby weight” I was 2 days post partum and I had hyperemesis for the whole 9 months and would sick up everything that I ate
Earonn - 4 months ago
"Women, do have babies! More babies! What? No, "baby weight" is bad and you shouldn't have it! Pop our our spawn but look like our po*rn models all the time!" Why, oh why do women decide against motherhood or even relationships?
Italian-Swiss Panda 4 months ago
Wow, when I read all these posts it makes me so grateful that a) I decided against having children and b) my partner isn't a complete and effing arsehole
Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
YES ! Yes I do need to freaking eat , now I can keep it down !! I got told when preg with my youngest , by a woman at the yard I kept my horse , off for eating a bloody mars bar at 7 pm , erm look lady I can’t eat jack shite till late Erving n keep it down im bloody starving ffs , (n I hate mars bars lol ) we do gotta eat you know 🤷♀️
#12
Had an emergency c-section, sepsis and a poorly baby in neonatal I hadn’t seen yet. Asked for help to get up so I can see him, got told “well you’ll be home tomorrow so best learn to do it yourself” did it myself and ripped my stitches open trying to get to my son
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
Sepsis is serious. This alone would require *care* - not just kneejerk responses from hospital staff. I'm sorry to hear that you were given such unhelpful advice from professionals who should have known better.
Kristin 4 months ago
Yup I was pretty much told the sane thing. I also had a very rough pregnancy with a surgery during and then hours and hours of labor, ended up badly hemorrhaging with 5 blood transfusions and then they couldn't contain the bleeding so ended up doing a emergency hysterectomy all while i had a code blue called twice. A CNA cane in to do her duties and mind you i couldn't walk so I had a catheter, I guess it leaked and she looked at me with disgust and said "omg seriously again? dont you know what lady like is?" I dont even remember what I said cause I saw red lol and she never came back into my room. My sister and I are very blunt and speak our mind so not only did I lay into her so did my sister. So yeah over a course of 6 years ive had 14 surgeries and last one made me septic and almost lost my life again. Icu for 3 weeks and hospital for 6 weeks.
Amused panda 4 months ago
I'm presuming the medical staff who said that were caring for baby on the neonatal ward and hadn't access to/been apprised of mom's own medical status. And by presuming, I mean hoping, because that is the only possible semi-reasonable explanation.
Load More Replies... Don’t forget the little things, like packing a hospital bag together. Sure, you’ll need the basics like clothes and toiletries, but think about adding comfort items too: a favorite blanket, cozy socks, snacks, or even a playlist to help her relax during the wait.
#13
Not said, but did. (I forgive him now but boy was I mad) I hadn’t gone into labour, but one of my organs were necrotic and it was poisoning my blood and giving me sepsis. Cat 1 emergency c-section, 3 days in ICU, 2 in high dependency unit (met my son twice so far) all of a sudden handed my child, I can’t walk, can’t sit up at all by myself. Barely any assistance as is. My partner has to go home and get things sorted, decided he doesn’t want to come back that night. So he leaves me completely alone, and vulnerable, unable to walk properly, unable to sit up properly, to look after my son who’s 4 weeks early, I can barely hold. The next day when he comes back, he proceeded to brag about getting to sleep in a proper bed. I went off on him as I’m highly emotional and in a lot of pain, he stayed the rest of the time I was in hospital. 11 days in total
Littlemiss 4 months ago (edited)
Forgave him? Or buried him in someone else's backyard after being able to move properly? I had a cat 1 emergency c-section, my husband barely left my side.
At Least I'm Not You 4 months ago
Both of my kids' births I was in the hospital with my wife the entire time. (Her mom looked after our oldest for the youngest's birth.) She'd had a c-section both times, and I knew she needed the help and that I'd have to know how to help with her wound when we were home.
Huddo's sister 4 months ago
My brother's partner just had a baby via emergency c-section, and he said he felt so guilty having to leave her alone, but they wouldn't let him stay with her :( He didn't even sleep much because he was worried about her.
tresgatos72 4 months ago
I would have kicked him to the curb for being so selfish and clueless.
Anne Roberts 4 months ago
This will sound sexist, but many men could not make it through pregnancy or giving birth if they had to.
Spannidandoolar 4 months ago
Surely there's a communication issue here. Either you call him or get a hospital worker to call him. Yes he was clueless and a complete ahole but he didn't need to stay that way.
#14
“Can you get off the bed so we can get a picture with the baby”
Smeghead Tribble Down Under 4 months ago
How about you get a photo of both my middle fingers standing at attention?
#15
My mother in law came round and we caught her kicking the moses basket trying to wake my baby up
Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
And mil is now BANNED from the home and the child forever I HOPE !!
One of the most powerful things you can do? Offer constant emotional support. Be the calm voice when things get intense, hold her hand, remind her how strong she is, and advocate for what she needs. If you’re unsure about anything, ask the medical team; there are no silly questions when it comes to your baby and your partner’s well-being.
#16
Baby had jaundice and the nurse told me it’s my fault
🇺🇦 🇵🇸 TribbleThinking 4 months ago
My late MIL was a sadistic so-and-so who delighted in hurting the entire family. She was also a midwife. I wonder how many patients she did this and variants of this to.
#17
I had an emergency c-section at 37 weeks due to my baby’s heart rate declining and my blood pressure dropping (i was planning on having an unmediated birth if it was possible). When my uncle met my baby for the first time (2 weeks after my baby was born), he tried to upset/embarrass me by saying ‘what happened to you wanting an unmediated birth? I knew you couldn’t do it after all’ (and then proceeded to laugh at me)… like SORRY i had to have an emergency c-section!
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
Or, remember that remark when you're 'helping' choose his nursing home.
Load More Replies... At Least I'm Not You 4 months ago
Unmediated birth is how you end up with dead mothers. Unmedicated births hurt like hell.
#18
My ‘auntie’ called me “fat and dirty” when I was 4 days postpartum from having an emergency C-Section (she came over unannounced) and said that I was rude for not offering her a cup of tea (I couldn’t walk)
Kate Johnson 4 months ago
What an entirely worthless human being. I would have told her to get the f out of my house and never come back!
Crystalwitch60 4 months ago
And she’s fat n LAZY make it yourself , oh n make mum one while you there !!
Huddo's sister 4 months ago
My best friend's mum said the same thing about not being offered a cup of tea, when she reluctantly let her visit when they came home from the hospital. All her mum was there for was to hold the baby, no other consideration in her head. She wasn't allowed to visit again for a long time!
Anne Roberts 4 months ago
She should having making the tea for you? My MIL came and stayed with us for a week after our daughter was born and she was wonderful. As a nurse she was the perfect person to help out. She passed s couple of years ago and I still miss her. Daughter is 39 now!
Practical help matters, too. Move things out of the way at home, stock up on her favorite snacks for a quick mood boost, and even tiny gestures like these can lighten her load and show her she’s loved.
One more thing, partners often forget? Know your own limitations, too. It’s easy to think you have to do everything perfectly, but sometimes the best support means knowing when to step back and let the professionals guide you both. If you feel overwhelmed or unsure, speak up, don’t try to fake it. Doctors and nurses are there for both of you, and they’d rather you ask questions than stay silent.
#19
It's not as bad as some at all. But I had an awful birth with my first baby.My FIL came to visit he had sat in his chair for 2 mins tops and sighed and said 'A Girl... I don't know what to do with Girls' my reply was ' Ohh well it's a good job she's not coming home with YOU then isn't it.' I was fuming as if a woman wanted to hear that after an awful birth... I could have throat punched him then and there. My SIL also said that my 1st baby was uglier then my 2nd
Michael Largey 4 months ago (edited)
"So the genes from your side of the family have struck again."
#20
I had just been moved to a ward and they put the blanket over bubs face so I pressed the buzzer and the women came charging in and said 'we can't look after the baby for you' all I wanted was them to take the blanket off her face.. I had just had a c section so I couldn't get to her ..
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
This was terrible nursing - they should have known your situation and not demanded impossibilities from you. And who on earth puts a blanket over a living baby's face ?
Lyoness 3 months ago
I had nurses pull this kind of sh*t too after a C-section. They'd left the crib halfway across the room and when the baby cried I pushed the buzzer to ask that they just move the crib closer and they told me to stop bothering them. So I pushed the d**n button every 30 seconds until someone got off their a*s to come help. She was a b*tch about it too. 20 years later and I'm still salty.
#21
'You want a baby brother or sister don't you? Tell mummy and daddy to start planning a second!' -My partners Nan, meeting her 5 day old great grandson for the first time, after it took us 14 months to conceive him.
Most importantly, don’t assume, ask. Check in with your partner often and find out exactly what she wants or needs in the moment. One birth is not like another, so clear communication is everything. And whatever you do, skip the judgment or unsolicited advice.
#22
When my daughter was born, she had blonde hair and it was mixed with a bit of blood so looked gingery (which is fine, I didn’t care), my ex sat and googled whether 2 blonde people could have a ginger baby, he then told me he’d googled it whilst laughing.. all whilst I was sat being stitched up after a traumatic birth
zvft2x6842 4 months ago
My parents both have brown hair, and my oldest brother has strawberry blonde hair
Phae Thompson 4 months ago
My late sister was a brunette and my ex-brother-in-law (baby daddy) had no hair. Red hair runs in our family yet my niece was born a blonde..
#23
I was in labour for 36 hours, almost died, didn’t sleep for two days… my mil came to my hospital room half an hour after I got there with 5 of her work friends. Woke my baby up when I finally put her to sleep. The first thing they said was “You look so tired, you look awful”… like mam please leave
#24
“Oh you’ve still got your belly” I had given birth 2 days before
Serena Myers 4 months ago
Do some people think the belly somehow snaps back into place like an elastic band?
BAN CAPITAL LETTERS 4 months ago
Even an elastic band wouldn't snap back into shape after that much stretching.
Load More Replies...At the end of the day, being truly present, physically, emotionally, and mentally, is what makes all the difference. Childbirth is no joke, but with a kind, patient, supportive partner by her side, a woman can feel stronger, safer, and more cared for during one of the biggest days of her life.
#25
I had just walked for the first time to the toilet 12 hours after a c section and blood transfusion and a male doctor saw me struggling and said ‘can I ask what you’re struggling with why are you in so much pain?’ Safe to say I told the midwives to never let that man near me again
#26
MIL came to meet our son, less than 24 hours after he was born, looked my partner dead in the eyes and said: “Are you sure you had anything to do with the creation of this child? Because he looks nothing like you.”
Kate Johnson 4 months ago
To which I would say, "Well look on the bright side, now you certainly will not have to worry about EVER seeing him or me again, and please f off out of this room!"
#27
That I was lazy and a bad mom for not taking my baby for a walk around town in the winter time, girl it was storming and raining and I had post partum depression
Sara Frazer 4 months ago (edited)
Post-partum depression is no joke, I had suícídal ideations all day for a year. Edited cuz BP is a coward not letting people share common human experiences, censoring suícídal
Well, which one of these posts really made you pause and think twice? Have you ever heard someone say something this unhinged right after childbirth, or maybe you’ve accidentally said something yourself? We’d love to hear your experience. Share your story below!
#28
‘You should have asked for a tummy tuck while they were there, I would have’
Phae Thompson 4 months ago
A tummy tuck is a Plastic Surgery(cosmetic) issue, NOT an Obstetrical issue that is medically necessary at times.
#29
My son got stuck. His grandmother, once he was born and had been checked over said “that’s the worst thing I’ve ever been through in my life”. I’m sorry, was it your birth canal he was just ripped from?!
Batwench 4 months ago
She probably meant emotionally wise, worried for mum and baby. It might have just come out wrong.
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
Years afterwards, from a safe distance, I can agree with you. It's always good to be kind. But at the time it would have been forgivable to throw jagged rocks ...
Load More Replies... #30
A woman asked when the baby was due, as I was holding the baby I had already given birth to 🤦♀️I was like "This is it, there's no one else coming"
#31
When I struggled to breastfeed my newborn who had jaundice and was sleepy, the nursing instructor told me “i think you don’t want to nurse and your body responds to your thoughts”
Lyoness 3 months ago
Those people are EVIL Our daughter was in the NICU and two "consultants" insisted on showing me how to nurse. Turns out I'm physically incapable (per the ob/gyn) but they spent hours telling me it was my fault and I just shouldn't give up so easily.
Load More Replies... Anne Roberts 4 months ago
Not every mother can nurse easily. Women are made to feel guilty if they bottle feed. My daughter tried very hard to nurse both her babies but it didn't work well. Still, I have two healthy grandkids. 🐊
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
How exactly did that person 'qualify' as a nursing instructor? Or did they just walk in off the street?
#32
not the most unhinged but “you need to stop holding her whilst shes sleeping or you’ll never be able to put her down, she wont sleep through the night” *same person not even 5 seconds after proceeds to pick sleeping baby up out of her moses basket*
Niki 4 months ago
Ah yes, the old "You'll spoil them if you hold them!" Yes, because a child crying and needing their mother is spoiled when they are too small to care for themselves.
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
But onlooker has the mystic power to not listen to their own 'advice' - which might indicate its value ...
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#33
I told my mum I was struggling mentally and she told me to ring my midwife because she was out for lunch with her friends
Shortstuff 4 months ago (edited)
I was 8 months pregnant, having lunch with my mother. I fainted and felt terrible. My husband was out of town with work. My mother said...well I have to get back to work now. Left me with the concerned restaurant owner. I caught the bus home, on my own. So much for motherly concern.
#34
A midwife told me i was useless because I wasn’t waking up to my son during the night. Turns out I had lost a severe amount of blood during labour & needed 2 blood transfusions they only found out 2 days later!
Kate Johnson 4 months ago
So many pretending to be midwives out there. What did they get their certificate from a mail order class?
Kristin 4 months ago
I had a mid wife st the state of my pregnancy, well I was 4 months along before finding out I was pregnant but I was having a hard time deciding on a name, she tells me she tells her patients to open the back door and scream the name and if it sounds right then that's the name 🤣 I loved her, she was amazing and im grateful I had her but sadly she passed away 1 month before my delivery 😔😔
#35
I have just had my baby 10 days ago and one of my dads friends went ‘oh hes tiny, how heavy was he?’ So i said ‘6lb 1oz’. His response was ‘oh thats small considering you were MASSIVE’. Nearly threw myself across the table
#36
2 days after birth “you’ve let yourself go”
#37
My mother in law arrived the hospital 3 hours after (uninvited and I’d said no) and said right no more kids now, I don’t want to be here again. She made me try to get an aborti0n every single time I announced.
🇺🇦 🇵🇸 TribbleThinking 4 months ago
Stop announcing and start enforcing non-invitations to your home.
#38
A midwife helped me feed my baby… via NG tube and said “I’m doing your job for you”. Phenomenal sentence considering my twins were born at 29 weeks and in incubators
Lana Pulliam 1 month ago
I tried to breastfeed my twins with a tube (and every other possible way), but premies don't generally have a suck reflex. Not OP's fault at all!
#39
Midwife tried telling me off for letting my husband hold our son while I went to the toilet… “ that baby needs keeping warm” obviously expected me to sit and wet myself
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
Depends on the husband ... some are more capable than others ... I'm told ...
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#40
My fourth C-section which started with my inside section scar tearing and full blown life or death bleeding MIL came to visit and said urgh that bed is covered in blood that’s disgusting and then looked at me and said and you.
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
In a hospital - "ugh, blood, that's disgusting" - where did she find your husband, in a gooseberry bush ?
Alessandra 4 months ago
I wonder why people choose to be a midwife. Do they think giving birth is all flowers and rainbows?
Dark Side of the Loom 4 months ago
MIL means mother in law, not midwife ;)
Load More Replies... #41
Not bad but very funny and embarrassing! I had a very painful and traumatic experience. Lost a lot of blood, was kept in for four days. When my father in law came to meet bub my peri bottle was on the side. He went over and used it to wash his hands before he held her 🤣😮🫠 I was so embarrassed and knew he would be so didn’t say anything then my sister in law burst out laughing and explained! We both wanted to die
Pink kitty 4 months ago
Had to Google this - Peri bottle: This squeeze bottle is a must-have for helping you urinate and keep clean after a vaginal delivery, especially if you have any tearing or stitches. To use a peri bottle, fill it with warm water and squeeze the bottle to squirt water directly onto your vaginal area while you urinate.
Karl-Heinz “Kalle” Wendt 4 months ago
"A peri bottle is essentially a portable bidet that helps cleanse the perineal area, which is the region between the vaginal opening and the a**s. "
M Whee 3 months ago
Haha, the selective censorship. Vaginal is ok but not a*s?
Load More Replies... #42
One of my sons was quite large when born..11lb 6oz...but was very bruised and a little swollen around his head and face...One of the other mothers Mum/grandmother was visiting and took it upon herself to go around looking at all the other mothers babys...When she came to my baby she remarked on the size of him and then asked if his daddy was a foreigner (poc)..My Irish husband who was also visiting me and his newborn son was neither amused or impressed
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
11 lb 6 oz - respect and sympathy ! And that grandmother seems to have outgrown her politeness ...
#43
"Let me know when you've had him, so I can block you on social media because I don't want to see anything" - My sons father who broke up with me a month before I had my son because they "didn't want to be a dad" (side note we co-parent now and they're a great parent)
Zoe Vokes 4 months ago
It’s incredibly surprising that they’re a good parent now because they were an absolute dıckhead then.
Kristin 4 months ago
That's sad. My best friend got pregnant with her second baby who was a girl. She was with the dad, then got suspicious of things he was doing well came out he was cheating. She left him. Well when it came to the baby she asked what his plans are. The chick he was cheating with told him, it's either me or your daughter (whom wasn't born yet) guess who he chose? Yup the chick. He signed over all rights cause his girlfriend was extremely jealous and intimidated by my bestie. She's incredibly accomplished and beautiful and I dont say that just cause she's my bestie lol but the girl he went with works at McDonald's but that's bwdise the point sorry but she's married now and her husband who just amazing to her and the kids, adopted her. She's 12 now and dont know yet she's been adopted by her husband. She has a feeling but she will tell her daughter when she's really wanting to know.
Laserleader 4 months ago
Sad, but not surprising. Many people don't want to parent, but then discover the joys when they meet their child.
#44
Wasn’t after birth but during birth they wanted to put the clip on my baby’s head and i was in a lot of pain so told them to stop and the midwife said to me aww a baby having a baby
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 4 months ago
Googled, it’s most likely an electrode monitor
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#45
a doctor was doing a check up on my csection wound and went ‘he better love you forever, look at your stretch marks’
#46
My mother in law told me that I should let my husband take a well deserved nap because he looked exhausted and needed a break after I just spent 4 days in labour and 2.5 hour pushing a baby out unmediated. She also asked if he wanted his eyebrows rubbed
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
"If you've forgotten the pain of giving birth to your son, I definitely haven't forgotten the pain of giving birth to mine !"
#47
I was worried about losing my milk supply because i was barely eating and she told me women in africa successfully breastfeed with very little food.. Like what? What kind of answer is that
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
There should be a female equivalent of 'patronising' to cover this sort of entitled comment - maybe 'matronising' ?
#48
‘Let me try and soothe her for you’… step away or I will throat punch you
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
If you're not currently holding the baby, I've heard people recommend a two-handed slap to the interrupter's ears. No danger of damage to the hyoid, "it's just a slap" but can be cataclysmic if you time them to hit simultaneously. I'm told.
#49
I’m not sure because when I was postpartum my partner cried because he loved my pregnant body
#50
My MIL said to me whne my husband wasnt with us- "oh he doesnt look like u at ALL! He has black har, you have like red/Brow-ish, och he just look only like hes daddy" My har was coloured and we have gone NO contact with her for over 2 yrs now.
Andrew Keir 4 months ago
Mental correction for lack of typing proficiency gives claim that baby doesn't resemble mother, has black hair and resembles father. Even Scotland has idiot grannies ...
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#52
I was called selfish for breastfeeding
Nives Tomaskovic 4 months ago
Oh, i heard that one with my 2nd born that actually managed to latch properly (everyone was feeding my 1st because she didn't latch and we tried to breastfeed for 4months before i finaly quit trying as i had more blisters on one side than milk comming out in both even with the pump) So i told them to wait in line to complain, because i could handle just one toddler at the time while i had breastfeeding baby latched in the same time (my 1st was 1y 2months at that time and she needed hughs while baby brother was eating,and i was all in to reduce jealousy. )
#53
Mines wasn’t birth but pregnancy, 8 week on, mum announces it to all her friends, without telling me, I start getting congratulated, confront mum, she tells me ‘oh those hormones are getting you good’ proceeds to tell me I’m overreacting and she’s excited and that it’s her news too! (10 years later and still won’t admit she was wrong) And also found out she’s rung 3 people to tell them before the 5 min drive to tell the other grandmother! Safe to say that after that any other pregnancy she was the last to know!
#54
I had preaclamsia but hospital wouldn’t listen anyway a nurse weighed me just before inducing me and she said step off the scales and back on there’s no way you’ve gained that much weight although you do look a bit heavy let’s hope the baby is big and you’ve not ate to much
#55
‘It’s not your fault it’s mummy’s fault’ (from a midwife to my baby whilst I had tears running down my face trying so hard to breastfeed)
#56
I had to have an emergency c section with my first born, and somebody said " oh, so you didnt go thru any pain then, lucky you!
Dark Side of the Loom 4 months ago
I’ve never understood this reaction. Everybody will agree that any kind of abdominal surgery can be difficult and painful, but for some mysterious reason a c section is not? Just because you don’t feel contractions (in the case of a planned section), doesn’t mean giving birth through surgery is a walk in the park ! Especially the post partum days, where you have to recover from a major surgery AND take care of a newborn at the same time.
#57
My FIL told me I needed to go back to the gym 2 weeks after my C-section
Kate Johnson 4 months ago
I'd say, "Well I may be out of shape, but your a noxious and stupid AH. I can get in shape, but you will ALWAYS be a noxious stupid AH."
#58
I was made to make everyone in my family cups of tea & stand around take photos of them holding my newborn the day after having him. Nobody allowed me to sit down for the first 45 mins
Kate Johnson 4 months ago
So your family is fully garbage human beings with no empathy. Just the kind of people you want around your children /
#59
My baby had a stork mark on her forehead and my “friend” said to me “aww are you not gutted she’s not perfect”
Nives Tomaskovic 4 months ago
I am from Croatia, we also call a stork mark when baby has a "mark" on a skin that will eventually go away but it usually stays for weeks or months before it starts to fade. Idk how you would call it properly
Load More Replies... #60
Midwife came in said if u got the hospital 5 minutes later the baby wouldn’t of made it. I had an emergency csection after buzzing them over and over saying something was wrong
#61
"if I didn't pick up the baby when it was crying you would have gotten post-partum depression" -mother in law (mind you I did have PPD so)
#62
‘You can’t be discharged until you’ve learnt how to breastfeed, expressing is not an option, he needs to latch’ as I was expressing from the pump THEY PROVIDED ME WITH!!!
#63
after having the C-section the doctor said oh your best start exercising to lose the weight you've put on
#64
Someone had brought me a balloon, that night was hallucinating experiencing post partum psychosis and all the midwife could do was keep telling me off about how baloons aren’t allowed on the ward
#65
she SHOUTED at me that I fell asleep while breastfeeding after being awake for 36 hours straight and being in labour or 24 of that 🙃 she did apologise once she realised
#66
My MIL said to my baby "oh mummy isn't giving you enough milk" because he was crying. My baby had lost a lot of weight due to a bad tongue tie and was struggling to feed. Could give multiple examples
#67
I've been told "it wasn't a real birth though was it, you couldn't do your job as a woman" when I had an emergency c section at 32 weeksbecause me and my baby nearly died 🙄 he spent 5 weeks in intensive care before coming home...
Kate Johnson 4 months ago
Whoever said that to me would her, "It's unfortunate that your mother didn't strangle you at birth".
#68
The moment I’d been handed my 3rd baby after my c-section (still had my innards hanging out) ‘do you think you’ll have another or are you done now’
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 4 months ago
In some cases (in the UK at least) if you've had several c-sections, they recommend you are sterilised at the next one, as it's dangerous to have too many. I wonder if they were asking for that reason?
Naomi Ellis 4 months ago
I was asked that while they were still elbow deep put my organs back in. Apparently it was a bit of a car crash in there, so I shouldn't have anymore.
#69
my babies dad came to the ward 2 hours after I gave birth took my daughter out my arms and told me I looked like shit like I had just gone through the most painful thing a woman could do
Kate Johnson 4 months ago
Makes you want to leave the state with the baby and leave no forwarding address. After all who would want their children influenced by such a POS.
#70
I was told to stop acting like I had 15 kids just because I didn’t want my 4 week old baby to be given water because it’s not good for him.
#71
“You gotta stop pressing your buzzer, we’re busy” ma’am I am BEDBOUND I can’t even reach my baby
#72
Midwife said my stretch marks were HUGE and looked like a tree… genuinely I hardly have any stretch marks ????
#73
I had “attachment issues to baby” and “didn’t want her” I had leaking spinal fluid and physically couldn’t sit up to hold her. That was a midwife
Dark Side of the Loom 4 months ago
You can’t make a generality out of a few examples. In my country at least, midwives are highly trained medical professionals (taking courses in medicine etc)
Load More Replies... #74
"when are you having a second? I hope it's a girl!" my toxic mother when I was 3 weeks postpartum with PND
#75
I got an argument started with me the day after having an emergency c section because I didn’t “ask how the family were”
#76
My partners parents keep telling me they know what to do with kids they had 2 .. because my 2nd son was born emergency c section and has colic,reflux,witching hour n now teething he’s 3 months so he’s slowly easing ish I said don’t mind people holding him but if you feed him I will show you how so it don’t cause him pain and please make sure you wind him well .. the answer I got is none of those conditions exist im making excuses so I’m stopping them from holding the baby. And my first son is autistic/ADHD apparently even though I’ve had it confirmed by a profession health person that’s also made up and don’t exist he’s just a happy child lol 😂 also when my 3 month old screams the house down I get told “yeah babies do that just deal with it” unfortunately I get it all the time
#77
I had a traumatic birth with my first , 40 stitches. my sister who was my birth partner for her said ( and still tells people now 10 years later ) I was vile and dramatic and should of just had the baby and got on with it. I've had medical personal tell me since I should of sued the hospital
EmJay 2 months ago
This! It’s most irritating that anyone thinks ‘ve means of!
Load More Replies... Kate Johnson 4 months ago
Sister sounds like a real piece of work. I bet you regret that choice.
#78
a new mama once went in a mood with me because I asked how she was recovering from her c-section before asking about the baby lol girl I just met this baby I’ve known you for months tf ?
#79
got told to stop complaining about the pain i was in so i could get out of there sooner (i was recovering from a 30 hour back and front labour , epidural and spinal block, whilst having antibiotics and 3 blood bags transfusions )
#80
During birth my midwife said to me after me crying in pain from contractions (first child) “aw honey we’re all allergic to pain aren’t we? You made the baby so you got to suck it up” I was ready for war
JB 4 months ago
Did you even read the title? Why would you assume all midwives are awful based on stories about terrible people saying disgusting and horrible things to new mothers? What did you expect to read? Do you think all husbands and baby dads are vile? Are all MILs evil bıtches? Are all medical personnel useless and cruel? There’s plenty of them in this thread.
Load More Replies... #81
Omg look at your stretch marks from the baby dads mum soon as she walked in the room technically speaking
#82
Everyone hates me for not giving my baby sugar
What do you think ?
Earonn - 4 months ago
All this and people are wondering why young women are less eager to have children. Individually, these are just a**e*holes. But they think they can act openly like that because mothers aren't really respected. Oh, people TALK bigly about "the blessing of motherhood", but like always - the more they glorify it, the less they actually appreciate it. I also repeat: recent mothers should be allowed to punch people.
Lauren Caswell 4 months ago
They showed me the placenta. I didn't know why, and said 'Oh, ok'. They looked annoyed and expectant. So after a pause, I said 'Thank you for taking care of my baby?' They nodded like I'd got the right answer. NB: they didn't notice I was bleeding out though, until someone noticed why's there so much blood on the floor?
Blondie23 4 months ago
I am SHOCKED and saden for each of these women. I had no idea how bad people could be. I was really lucky.. I had one bad nurse but outside of that the entire staff and the doctor, my family and my (now) ex were all really good to me and the baby. I was well taken care of after my emergency c-section and everyone was fantastic to my baby.. even her biological father (my ex). I am so sorry to all the ladies that posted in this thread. Y'all didn't deserve any of that and if I could.. I would give each of you a hug and remind you that you are a freaking rock star for birthing babies!!! Love to you all!!!!!!
KrazyChiMama 4 months ago
I threw my (step)daughter’s lactation nurse out of her hospital room. She made the mistake of accusing her of not trying hard enough and told her she was “being lazy”! She just had her first baby completely natural! I said that’s enough out you go and went to the nurse station to let them know we had no interest in seeing her again. It took every ounce of self control to not say what I REALLY wanted to say!!
Justbecause 4 months ago
I have back problems so my birthing options were limited. My birth plan reflected my medical options due to my back, midwife laughed at me having a birth plan and said good luck with that, proceeded to ask me if i wanted medication i am allergic to when I said no she said I will regret it and be asking for it when its to late. It was my second baby, whole woman was talking like I was experiencing the impossible even though I had already done it once.
Justbecause 4 months ago (edited)
My SILs were a bit tetchy about how my births went done, my MIL is an over sharer so they knew everything despiteme not talking to the SILs about it. SIL gave me a nasty talking to about how I was lording it over them and how I had easy births and a bunch of other stuff. Didn't say anything but boy did it hurt. I didn't have easy births, I had limited opinions so the things they did during there births weren't on the table for me.
Load More Replies... Lee Gilliland 4 months ago
My MIL called to bawl me out the day I gave birth and was finally sleeping because she couldn't find her a*shole son who was out getting drunk.
Earonn - 4 months ago
All this and people are wondering why young women are less eager to have children. Individually, these are just a**e*holes. But they think they can act openly like that because mothers aren't really respected. Oh, people TALK bigly about "the blessing of motherhood", but like always - the more they glorify it, the less they actually appreciate it. I also repeat: recent mothers should be allowed to punch people.
Lauren Caswell 4 months ago
They showed me the placenta. I didn't know why, and said 'Oh, ok'. They looked annoyed and expectant. So after a pause, I said 'Thank you for taking care of my baby?' They nodded like I'd got the right answer. NB: they didn't notice I was bleeding out though, until someone noticed why's there so much blood on the floor?
Blondie23 4 months ago
I am SHOCKED and saden for each of these women. I had no idea how bad people could be. I was really lucky.. I had one bad nurse but outside of that the entire staff and the doctor, my family and my (now) ex were all really good to me and the baby. I was well taken care of after my emergency c-section and everyone was fantastic to my baby.. even her biological father (my ex). I am so sorry to all the ladies that posted in this thread. Y'all didn't deserve any of that and if I could.. I would give each of you a hug and remind you that you are a freaking rock star for birthing babies!!! Love to you all!!!!!!
KrazyChiMama 4 months ago
I threw my (step)daughter’s lactation nurse out of her hospital room. She made the mistake of accusing her of not trying hard enough and told her she was “being lazy”! She just had her first baby completely natural! I said that’s enough out you go and went to the nurse station to let them know we had no interest in seeing her again. It took every ounce of self control to not say what I REALLY wanted to say!!
Justbecause 4 months ago
I have back problems so my birthing options were limited. My birth plan reflected my medical options due to my back, midwife laughed at me having a birth plan and said good luck with that, proceeded to ask me if i wanted medication i am allergic to when I said no she said I will regret it and be asking for it when its to late. It was my second baby, whole woman was talking like I was experiencing the impossible even though I had already done it once.
Justbecause 4 months ago (edited)
My SILs were a bit tetchy about how my births went done, my MIL is an over sharer so they knew everything despiteme not talking to the SILs about it. SIL gave me a nasty talking to about how I was lording it over them and how I had easy births and a bunch of other stuff. Didn't say anything but boy did it hurt. I didn't have easy births, I had limited opinions so the things they did during there births weren't on the table for me.
Load More Replies... Lee Gilliland 4 months ago
My MIL called to bawl me out the day I gave birth and was finally sleeping because she couldn't find her a*shole son who was out getting drunk.
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