ADVERTISEMENT

Many of us enjoy getting a cheeky takeaway after a hard day at work or school. Not only is it a way to reward ourselves for our efforts but we also end up supporting the local businesses and forming a bond with the shop owners. However, you can’t expect every single meal to be as stellar as what you’d get at a five-star restaurant. Some folks take it very personally if they have a sub-par experience and then vent their rage in the form of bad reviews.

That’s where the witty ‘Takeaway Trauma’ Instagram account comes in. The social media project collects the funniest and most unhinged customer reviews, and shares the savage comments that the restaurant owners came back with. Check out the freshest posts below and upvote your faves. Are we the only ones getting hungry right now? We hope not!

#1

Seek Help With Anger Management

Seek Help With Anger Management

takeawaytrauma Report

RELATED:
    #3

    Intoxicated

    Intoxicated

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Gøøse
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wtf kinda platform rates things out of 6? Sure it is just as arbitrary as 5, but you'd think it would stick to tradition.

    View more comments

    Takeaways are huge in the United Kingdom. Statista notes that the fast food and takeaway market in the UK amounted to 21.37 billion pounds (27.46 billion dollars) in 2022, with a forecast of 22.04 billion pounds (28.32 billion dollars) in 2023.

    The fun ‘Takeaway Trauma’ project has grown immensely since it was founded back in late 2020. At the time of writing, the Instagram page has grown to house 184k takeaway and sassy comeback-loving fans. It’s a favorite of many internet users and has become a popular niche for anyone craving a big dose of negativity with a bunch of comedy poured all over it. All you need is an internet connection, as well as a big bag of popcorn or a large portion of curry fries and you’ve got an enjoyable evening ahead of you, really.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #4

    Sorry To Hear About Your Nan

    Sorry To Hear About Your Nan

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #5

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #6

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I read that as Briany and was thinking "Who's she? The nun?"

    View more comments

    It’s easy to see why the page is such a huge hit. The posts are incredibly relatable on so many levels. First of all, you’re dealing with the topic of food. That’s something that absolutely everyone can relate to because everyone needs to eat in order to survive. So the quality of the food and service is a touchy subject for many folks. Many of us have also eaten out at least once in our lives, so there’s another layer of relatability for you there.

    ADVERTISEMENT

    Secondly, people tend to be drawn to negative news more than positive topics. Though we all enjoy wholesome content from time to time, it’s spicy takes, criticism, and drama that dominate our attention. That’s why reading negative reviews is its own form of entertainment. As is watching how business owners put overly-critical wannabe food critics in their place with their rapier-like wit.

    #7

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Mell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want to read her other reviews.

    View more comments
    #8

    Put Food In Living Room

    Put Food In Living Room

    takeawaytrauma Report

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #9

    Hehe

    Hehe

    takeawaytrauma Report

    ADVERTISEMENT

    And thirdly, there is a ton of comedy to enjoy on ‘Takeaway Trauma.’ Laughter helps us forget about our worries, improves our immune system, gives our internal organs a decent workout, and makes us feel good. So it’s no wonder that this cocktail of food, negativity, and humor has been so popular with the Instagram crowd!

    #11

    Says A Lot About You

    Says A Lot About You

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #12

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Red PANda (she/they)
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sarel down there is partially right. It is the big businesses and companies that are responsible for making so much plastic waste. Then they pin it on us to dispose of it properly. Recycling was made in the first place partly because of an ad I think IKEA sent out after introducing cheap light furniture made with plastic. Some of you might remember it; it was that one with someone driving a car and littering and a Native American picking up the litter and crying a single tear or smthn idk THE POINT IS that big companies and businesses will try to subtly pin the blame on us and make us do something about it while they do nothing >:/ Edit: some people have pointed out to me that the ad was not made by IKEA, that’s my bad. HOWEVER it was funded by big plastic-producing companies like Coca Cola. Also, I’m also not saying that we don’t have to do anything, and that we aren’t partially to blame for this, I’m just saying we ALL have to do our part and these companies are slacking off and pushing the blame all onto us.

    View more comments
    ADVERTISEMENT

    During a previous interview with the founder of ‘Takeaway Trauma,’ Bored Panda learned that the account even got featured on The Jonathan Ross Show, on the BBC. “I didn’t even realize they were airing it, they just did, and then someone just messaged the account telling me they saw it!” the founder told us earlier. 

    “I’ve definitely seen a big increase in audience, especially since the TV show. People seem to be more and more involved in the humor, it’s almost like we have our own little community, which is exciting,” they said.

    #13

    Relatable Tbh

    Relatable Tbh

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #14

    Bye Bye

    Bye Bye

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm not a fan of complaining about the price, unless it's relevant to the problem. If you're willing to pay 6 pound (or 7) for a waffle with ice cream that's on you. You know what you're getting. If however you pay 7 pounds for a waffle with ice cream and the waffle is the size of a cracker then fair enough.

    View more comments
    #15

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Yoyo
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What... what did I just read??

    View more comments

    “I do see some really savage replies by business owners, some are so rude that I can’t actually post them as it’s pretty offensive—that’s how bad it's got!”

    Back in late 2021, the founder of the project told us that they’d seen a surge in negative reviews about pizza deliveries. “It seems that the Neapolitan-style pizzas with the thin base seem to always fold over, or toppings fall off. It’s quite funny but at the same quite frustrating for the customer!” they said.

    #16

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Owner convinced me that the customer was right. More than right, in fact.

    Actively Lazy Cat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow...someone doesn't handle criticism very well..

    Fuzzy bunny feet
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wouldn't go there after that reply. They don't care about their customers.

    DaniD
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gaetano's is a Pa/NJ restaurant. Every 1 star rating anyone gave has some snarky response from the owner.

    Xenon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like a charming place. Not!

    Load More Replies...
    Amy Doyle
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's not good business at all. If I seen this on a review I'd probably avoid a place like this.

    Black Rabbit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Owner of that place probably lost a lot more business for being a dïck like that.

    Matt Harrell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The review might keep me from trying, but the response guarantees I tell friends not to try, either.

    Cat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Me as a restaurant owner

    Fake Name
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Beautiful roast, especially if the owner is implying he banged dudes wife on wedding day.

    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That response assures I would never go there. Don’t reward bad behavior.

    Niki Munster
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    With a response like that, I wouldn't expect it to be good ever

    Lezbiwitch
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That response was everything 😂😂😂 I'd go there

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Best come back!

    Blyss Blyssylb
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    O-o-oh!!! BURN! 🤭 Although, Gaetano's Cheesesteaks reply was rude and unnecessary.🤨

    Felicia
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So many people are rude and entitled these days and easily offended. Life's to short to not be blunt, sarcastic and have a sense of humor.

    RavenTheCat
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    wait so are you agreeing or disagreeing with this particular humor? forgive me i just woke up as of this message

    Load More Replies...
    View more comments
    #17

    Mark The Rat

    Mark The Rat

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Diolla
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Which restaurant is this?? Asking for a friend.

    View more comments
    #18

    Never Been

    Never Been

    takeawaytrauma Report

    “Funnily enough, one thing I have learned is that most people only really write reviews if it’s really bad or really good—rarely in between. I think sometimes people are so annoyed and angry that in the heat of the moment after just receiving their ‘bad food,’ they go on to the internet and type everything they are thinking about right there and then,” they shared.

    ADVERTISEMENT
    #19

    So Much Greece

    So Much Greece

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Francois
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love Grease, the culture, the islands, Athens and history is amazing.

    View more comments
    #20

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Julie S
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm guessing some of these are from people that English is not their first language.

    View more comments
    #21

    Not One But 2 Contact Lenses

    Not One But 2 Contact Lenses

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Matt Du
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was so the chef could keep an eye on it while he was cooking other stuff

    View more comments

    Meanwhile, during another interview, the page founder opened up to Bored Panda about the inspiration behind ‘Takeaway Trauma.’ "I'm a big takeaway fan and found myself going to order a delivery and thought I’d check the reviews of a particular establishment. After checking the good reviews, I thought I better check the bad ones also," they said.

    #22

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Ge Po
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Doesn't help, this.One comment like this would not necessarily scare me off. The owner's response will.

    View more comments
    #23

    Get Stuffed

    Get Stuffed

    takeawaytrauma Report

    zgillet
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ugh, hurting a business for a joke? Downvoting this one.

    View more comments
    #24

    Plaster (From A Finger) In The Butter Chicken!!!!

    Plaster (From A Finger) In The Butter Chicken!!!!

    takeawaytrauma Report

    "I came across the most hilarious reviews and was genuinely crying with laughter. Without really thinking about it, I screenshotted the reviews just for my own personal use to send to friends, etc. People seemed to find them funny so I thought, let's try and curate these and create a page out of it!" they told Bored Panda.

    According to the founder of ‘Takeaway Trauma,’ folks ought to have more empathy and be more forgiving with restaurant staff. “People in general are so impatient and want things instantly. As soon as these high standards aren't met, the natural human reaction is to complain,” they said.

    #25

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Matt Du
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Probably tried to pay with followers

    View more comments
    #26

    Oh Rita, We Always Knew You Loved A Guy In Uniform

    Oh Rita, We Always Knew You Loved A Guy In Uniform

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Cammy Cat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This story could have also gone horribly wrong

    View more comments
    #27

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Bouche, Audi, and Shyla, oh my!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It doesn't actually say she didn't like the food, just the location.

    View more comments

    "I think a lot of the time, people give too much stick to takeaways, however, with that being said, some of the images of takeaway food I’ve seen really do look awful, so I think you can only really determine it on a case by case basis,” they pointed out that there are two sides to this particular delicious and metaphorical food industry coin.

    #28

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Amberlie Mikelsen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When you order a beef dish, (especially one that the beef is capable of falling out) you tend to expect to be able see or at least taste the beef. A typical sandwich usually contains between 3 & 5 oz of meat, so this one seems a lot more legit than some.

    View more comments
    #29

    Dryer Than Me Nana

    Dryer Than Me Nana

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Coyote Osborne
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm really concerned that they know how dry their nana is.

    View more comments
    #30

    Rude And Pushy

    Rude And Pushy

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Maria Maria
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It is hardly okay to be rude and pushy to your wife.

    View more comments

    We’d love to hear about the very worst (and best!) takeaways that you’ve ever had, Pandas, so swing by the comment section to share your experiences with all the other readers. Have any of you ever worked at a takeaway or fast food place? If so, we’re keen to hear about things from the other side of the counter.

    Meanwhile, here at Bored Panda, we’re pretty big fans of ‘Takeaway Trauma,’ and you can check out our previous features about the project here and here when you’re done enjoying this list. 

    #31

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #32

    Black Bird Feather

    Black Bird Feather

    takeawaytrauma Report

    See Also on Bored Panda
    #33

    4 And A Half Teethed Monster

    4 And A Half Teethed Monster

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Ai
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wouldn't be so funny if they laught about missing leg or a blind person, right? Dental care is expensive and some problems comes from parents mistakes or sickness but somehow it's ok to laught at poor people :/

    View more comments
    #34

    Don’t Think It’s The Same As Racism Barry

    Don’t Think It’s The Same As Racism Barry

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I looked at the date. Wasn't there some kind of bug going around? You know, the one that made cash transactions a bit frowned upon and everyone went contactless?

    View more comments
    #35

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Matt Du
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A woodworm walks into a bar... and says, "is the bar tender?"

    View more comments
    #36

    Pizza Was Lifting

    Pizza Was Lifting

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Better owner resonse: "We are so glad to hear you found our pizza lifting. Whether it was soul lifting, heart lifting, or taste bud lifting, it's our pleasure to provide our customers that experience!"

    View more comments
    #38

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #39

    No Vaccine For Stupidity

    No Vaccine For Stupidity

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Groaver Andout
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If he's been eating the "dead skin off the bottom of his great grandad' feet", he is in no position to criticise other's food.

    View more comments
    #40

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #41

    Checked Staffs Teeth

    Checked Staffs Teeth

    takeawaytrauma Report

    kathryn stretton
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe it was a small chip off a chicken bone ? Still not good, but better than tooth.

    View more comments
    #42

    Ask Chefs To Watch Youtube

    Ask Chefs To Watch Youtube

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Groaver Andout
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What food did you order before your mother delivered you?

    View more comments
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #43

    Dirty Fingernail

    Dirty Fingernail

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Groaver Andout
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wakes up sweating in the night with flashing images of fingernails.

    View more comments
    #44

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #45

    Grow Up Mate

    Grow Up Mate

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Guessing this is a fake review and they're responding accordingly. But it really doesn't sound professional when they do this.

    View more comments
    #46

    Pubes Left In Both Sauces

    Pubes Left In Both Sauces

    takeawaytrauma Report

    FatKidShakeDown
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would have stopped eating after the FIRST pube

    View more comments
    #47

    Chicken Feathers

    Chicken Feathers

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Debby Keir
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the feathers were coated in batter, you wouldn't see them till you felt them in your mouth.

    View more comments
    #48

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #49

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Roman Hans
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Ohmugod, the rice and the dumplings and the sauce are all DISGUSTING! I wonder what the spring rolls taste like."

    View more comments
    #50

    Assaulted

    Assaulted

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #52

    Cockroach Pasta

    Cockroach Pasta

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Frozengeckolover
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You saw bugs on the floor, and still ate there? One time, just after ordering at a restaurant, I saw a roach crawl across the wall by my booth. I left immediately and called the health inspector. I was hoping it was a fluke; during the rainy season pest control can be a problem. They found roaches all over the kitchen and storage rooms too. They failed the inspection, and got shut down. They reopened several weeks later, stayed open for a few months, and got shut down again. They did not reopen again.

    View more comments
    See Also on Bored Panda
    #53

    Awful Sweaty

    Awful Sweaty

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ok, there are at least four Forno Marmary stories on here. I'm starting to think maybe it's the shop not the customers.

    View more comments
    #54

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    ί𝔫CίŦᵃт𝐔𝐬
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If he sneezed in your kabab in front of you, why did you pay for it and take it out?

    View more comments
    #55

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Stardust she/her
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Quote from my first grade teacher “God gave you hands before he gave you spoons”

    View more comments
    #56

    Drugged With Laxatives

    Drugged With Laxatives

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Groaver Andout
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Nearly went to the doctors". Nearly didn't make things up.

    View more comments
    #57

    This Is The Truth

    This Is The Truth

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the food is as tempting as the owner's pick up line, I'm making a reservation.

    View more comments
    #58

    Selfish Exaggerating Git

    Selfish Exaggerating Git

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #59

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As reporters said during the Watergate scandal "That's a non-denial denial!"

    View more comments
    #60

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    Traumatic Takeaway Stories

    takeawaytrauma Report

    #61

    Wearing A Hat

    Wearing A Hat

    takeawaytrauma Report

    Sydney B.
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who wants to bet it was a red baseball cap

    View more comments