30 Screenshots That Show The Worst Side Of LinkedIn, Shared By This Twitter Page

"Smiley faces" are profesionally called emoticons.

I remember being reprimanded for using :) in several emails when I first started a job many, many years ago (apparently I was alerting everyone to how "immature" I was). Because of that, I now worry that I'm doing the wrong thing every time I use any type of emoticon anywhere. So yeah... Thanks for that never ending guilt, Corporate World.

I hate protocols, they just cut communication. “Arent considered profesional” by who? How does using them affect their work? Does they make them mediocre? U better have a happy good employee than loose one cause they use emojis. Appreciate ppl by their habilities, not by their not harming way of communication.

You professionally failed at the social contact and interaction 101 class...

On another note: what's with the "Nobody: , Me: something something" format? Anyone know where this came from and why am I seeing this all over the internet lately?

Wait... there are LinkedIn influencers???

No, it's so innacurate! Don't forget to start a new line. Every word. Because they all deserve their own line.

😑

I was an Ambient Stock Replenishment Officer once many years ago. In plain English I was a shelf stacker at a supermarket. The company actually won an award from the Plain English Campaign for its use of shite in job titles

My first job was a sub aquatic porcelain cleansing engineer...

McDonald's is actually a real estate company. but ok.

It’s all in the flowery description

They all must of had the same taxi driver! And, he is terrible at his job that he can only get 1 fare every 48 hours!

.....and the wife was expecting - groceries, at least!

At first I read "crab diver"...

I bet these cab drivers got a runny nose (knowledge courtesy of another BP post)

At least the wife will get enough salt (from all the crying)

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Too true!

My notifications regarding linkedin are usually around how it's been hacked again

LinkedIn is useless to start with

These companies that have forced workers into working during their lunch hour are now trying to act like they are giving something back by allowing workers to do what they are entitled to do

Finally, the lunch break has been re-invented.... to be a lunch break!

I have to (somewhat) agree with this. Like the rest of team, I worked 9-5:30 with an hour break before the pandemic. Since working from home, I've sometimes sent my first email at 6 a.m. and my last at 11 p.m., and I very rarely take a whole hour for lunch. Sadly, it's a similar story for the majority of office workers post-pandemic. But, on the flip side, we're counting our lucky stars that we still have a job.

*facepalm*

Oh wow no

At least he is honest with his remarks in parentheses

Is this Prince Harry's new profile? ;oP

Yeah, all their stories are crap, except for my awesome story about how I taught a duck to solve differential equations, and changed his life.

I love stollen; how do you get it in quotes ... "stollen"!

'Ego wank' - LMFAO

Chich

Chich

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I'm getting tired of the whole "Look at meeeee!" crowd, and I don't even give them much attention.

Stolen: (something taken by someone to whom the something doesn't belong). Stollen: a fruit bread of nuts, spices, and dried or candied fruit, coated with powdered sugar or icing sugar and often containing marzipan. It is a traditional German bread

Pretentious dickface.

Oh generous god, how can we ever repay your kindness?