Folks Online Think People Who Weren’t Raised Right Show Clear Signs Of It With These 30 Behaviors
Being a human is hard. There are so many physiological, psychological, social and cultural things that are in play all the time, there's bound to be hiccups every once in a while, if not more often.
And it's even more so a problem when a very complicated you have to pass on your worldly knowledge and skill on to your kids so that they won't make the same mistakes. But they're as complicated as everyone else!
And the vicious cycle keeps on perpetuating itself because of this, leading some to wonder about it. And much of today's wondering is done on Reddit, among other places, where, incidentally, we have one user asking folks what’s a sign that somebody wasn’t raised right?
Bored Panda collected the top answers to the now-viral thread, and has glued together the macaroni-art piece you can see below. So, upvote, comment, and discuss these and other signs someone wasn't raised right in the comment section below!
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If you go to someone's house, and they cook for you, you eat it with a big smile and lots of thanks, even if it was garbage.
My wife brought her friend over for lunch, I made pierogies, she goes "that's not a meal, that's a side" and goes to get Quiznos. Blew me away.
Someone's hospitality is the deepest respect they can show you. You have to give it back. How conscientious you are of that scenario is a good sign on how you were raised
Yes, if you don't like the food, keep it to yourself. Act gracious. Act kind.
They always portray themselves as a victim. Nothing is ever their fault and somebody is always out to get them.
I’m a victim minded person. Each time something happens, I blame the other person and hold a grudge against them. Now I’m doing much better and have started owning up to my mistakes without unfairly blaming someone
If they make messes in public areas and just wander off (leaving trash in the theater, not flushing, leaving the cart in a parking space).
Edit: forgot the theater thing is the norm in Britain! I meant in general, leaving a mess where it's not supposed to be.
They act like mental illness is something you can just get over.
How they treat people from whom they have nothing to gain.
How they act as a boss when their employee messes up.
Yelling and belittling shouldn’t be your first option.
Someone that does things to intentionally hurt another persons feelings after they’ve expressed that, that certain thing hurts their feelings.
Not respecting personal boundaries.
If you're wondering why someone has these sorts of issues, take a look at their parents.
I love my fur baby, but why why why must his comfy spot be 1 inch from my face? We've established your ownership of me 8,364 times already. get-off-me...c4e626.jpg 
They whistle, snap their fingers, or make that "pspsps" sound to get their server's attention in a restaurant.
We lost a beloved pet today, one of our friends said "time to get another". This happened today! I'm not sure if he's stupid, insensitive or just an a*s know we're not friends anymore.
I've learned over the years that as much as the people I care about love their pets, it's wrong for me to assume they even want another pet after having to put one down. I've had to put 3 pets down in the past 15 years sooner than I had hoped due to undiagnosed medical issues. I now have an almost 14 year old beagle mix girl (Ziggy). When she goes, I will likely be unconsolable and if anyone tells me (that doesn't understand the bond between a pet and owner) to "just get another one", I will likely remove said person from my life. I don't even know if I would WANT another pet after Ziggy goes, and my husband may not want another one either. It's just simply insensitive and uncalled for to a grieving pet parent.
You give them a lift and they leave rubbish in your car.
Yep but I rather they leave the trash in the car than throw it out the window...that's an absolute no-no.
Who are the guys who spit out their chewing gum into urinals? I see this all the time at work and I work in a high end corporate place. Do they think it disolves and goes down the pipe? The janitor has to pick that out.
The word "no" just means throw a fit and be as obnoxious as you can be until you get your way. "No" does not mean that rules are rules or someone's job might be on the line, they're the important one, not anyone else.
They one-up you *all the time*.
Pfft! Those trophies are weaksauce compared to my collection. Why, did you know I was the 1977 world pickleball champion? All of these new players need to know who’s boss.
I know a few of these types of people, and they tend to have one or more of the following traits:
* They are disrespectful to everyone, not just authority figures. Watch how they treat customer service or retail staff.
* They have no manners in general, or only use manners when they absolutely have to in order to preserve their own interests.
* They are cruel to people and/or animals, and laugh at the suffering of others.
* They are selfish.
* They destroy things, steal, and cheat. Some also commit more serious crime.
* They expect handouts from everyone.
* They shirk hard work and responsibility whenever they can.
* They complain a lot, and constantly act like they are a victim.
* They are terrible parents to their own children.
Treatment of servers, retail workers, etc - that's the key. If they pick on someone that can't fight back, that is beyond a red flag. You are officially a complete b a s t a r d.
They gossip about others and will be vindictive behinds people’s backs, but pretend to be sweet to their face.
Not putting the cart back at the grocery store.
So piling them up on your truck and driving away is cool? TIL
Turning conversation back to themselves at all cost.
Being a good listener is a sign of a person raised well.
Edit: to clarify, I don’t mean quiet or a doormat. I mean generous, empathetic, supportive and curious. Good follow-up questions without making it about oneself, etc.
This one usually doesn't go alone. Such people are also narcissistic and emotionally abusive, extracting validation from humiliating and belittling others. They know everything, they give unsolicited lessons and advice, the world revolves around them. If you lost somebody for example, your grief is nothing as compared to what they had suffered in a similar situation. If you're planning to do something, they've already done it ahead of you. If you wish to visit a place, they've already been there before you. I had such a "friend". Avoid them like plague.
People who don’t offer to help you clean up when they are visiting you.
Like having friends over and them leaving you with all the beer bottles, bowls and glasses on the table. I don’t mind cleaning up, but I always offer when at someone else house. You make the mess together.
I'm never sure if the protocol on this. I would always offer, but it does depend on how well you know people and some people seem genuinely offended if you try to help out, like they want to act as the hosts and treat you like guests.
They don't know how to do normal household stuff. I've seen people that don't even know how to make their own coffee or clean a toilet.
Edit: I only mentioned making coffee as an example. If you don't know how to make coffee because you don't drink it, that's fine.
I don't know how to clean a house very well, because my mother did all of it. Her reasoning.....me, my sister, and my dad won't do it right. It's not like I don't do my best to keep a clean home, but it's not a very good job.
They apologize for every little thing. Probably a sign that they grew up with abusive parents that got mad over anything and everything.
They will never try to defend something they believe using logical reasons.
How be be a good neighbor: never bring up religion or politics when talking with neighbors.
I'm gonna answer this literally.
As a teacher, I see there's a lot of different values that go into parenting styles, some that aren't my values but still raise a productive, responsible, and successful child. But there is evidence of bad parenting from a child development point-of-view.
-Is extra clingy and implies or outright states your their sole custodian for their well-being.
-Is incredibly aggressive about getting their way or being correct all the time.
-Responds to slights or inconveniences violently.
-Is extremely withdrawn and doesn't care for self.
-On the flip side, is very self-sufficient from a very young age and also has anxiety and/or depression.
-Seeks attention constantly. Not just a lot, but *constantly.*
Obviously, the child abuse signs are indicators of not being raise right, and only apply here to actual children, but it never hurts to remind people of them:
-Has suspicious bruising/injuries on body where it's not normal to have injuries (ex. bruised forehead and skinned knees are normal on toddlers, black eyes are not)
-Carefully covers parts of the body that would not normally be covered (Ex. Won't roll up sleeves even a little on hot days which, bonus, is also a sign of self-harm)
-Is inappropriately sexual and/or knowledgable about sexuality for age group
-Is weirdly afraid to be alone with another person. Not just, I dont want to go home because my dad's gonna give me a whuppin for starting a fight at school, but something like finding a lot of excuses to not hang out with an older cousin ever
-Is often dirty, stinky, soiled
-Is often underfed
-Tells you they are being abused
I took this way too seriously, but there you go!
EDIT: People are commenting with personal situations that involve the warning signs of child abuse I mentioned, but aren't child abuse in their case. This is what makes it so hard to detect. Kids are always bruised, stinky, and secretive. What's important is to keep an open mind, and sort of observe a pattern of signs and behaviors. If alarm bells go off, our first impulse is to explain it away, but making an anonymous tip is not as harmful as people believe. In my experience, nothing is even investigated until the reports pile up unless you physically witness the abuse.
EDIT 2: Just to be clear, the first list just means the parents or household should be better to optimally encourage the wellness of a child. The second is of warning signs of abuse.
Of course, the best advice is NOT have them in the first place, if you don’t want them or can’t handle being parents. What kills me is that I wanted children but couldn’t have them. Those who are so cavalier about their children, who don’t care about their children, who abuse their children, who murder their children infuriate me. They’re able to have what I couldn’t, yet are unable to appreciate it. You don’t want your kids? Fine. I have a front doorstep. Just leave the kids there, ring my doorbell, and run. I know that’s an extreme statement. What I’m actually saying is if you don’t want your children, there are a huge number of people who do—-in a good way, I mean—-so instead of hurting your kids, find them another, better home, with people who will be good parents, who will take good care of them, keep them safe and healthy, and love them like they were their biological children. I don’t mean foster care, unless your state does an excellent job of vetting foster parents really closely. Give your kids a fighting chance of having happy lives, ffs.
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Helicopter parenting has lead to a new dysfunctional generation. A family friend is a University Prof. and says it is astounding the change over the decades. Generally many students literally need to be lead by their hand and lack a lot of skills as you g adults! Or, with Millennials wanting to raise their children as equals- actually overheard a father asking his two year old what she wanted to eat. A two year old is looking to the parent to raise them. Some decision making is ok but not having any boundaries is not. It’s screwing up another generation, but in a different way. Another family friend, ( a principal), said that ‘children are looking to their peers as role models.’
Helicopting parents has nothing to do with being equals sigh. This is bias BS, helicopter parents are ones who hover over and are in every part of the kids life so they can't be an equal ever by default that parent always sees the kid as weaker, and needs their protection or guidance. It can also be abusive I seen some who don't trust their kid who yell, and pyschologically damage them, or just flat out hit their kids if they stray to far from their plans for them. Treating a kid as equal normally means letting them make mistakes and learn from them. If you holding their hands its that kid wasn't an equal that kid was treated like either a f**k up, or a baby not a grown up, and not trusted to do anything on their own. And this c**p boomers pushed on millianals we just invent this I saw stuff you are complaining about done to my generation as kids by yours or or older in some cases, just back then we only news at 7pm and newspaper not the net, so people "minded their own business."
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When I worked with kids we had to follow a checklist of signs a kid is being abused, and it was pretty much this. The mandatory training course was a thoroughly depressing experience. :(
I bruise easily and was an active tomboy. My 5th grade teacher arranged to talk to me alone and ask me some questions. I was horrified when I realized she was trying to determine if I was abused. I was not and assured her of that. But it is good that she noticed and asked. So many just turn away.
Parenting is the hardest job in the world. Trying to get the balance right so they have good self esteem and confidence but are not arrogant or think the world owes them something is a daily task. I've learnt though as a teaching assistant that if you don't teach little ones respect for other people, their feelings or their property, it is extremely difficult to instill it in them at a later date.
Some people are extremely withdrawn and don't take care of themselves because of mental illness
How is this the least voted thing here? Must be a lot of bad parents clicking click bait who got sore on this one. But its dead on, these all signs something is off at home, people can go "oh they are just..." what ever but doesn't change things. Yes some times anxiety is from say high functioning autism, but it still agraveted even if you feel like best parent ever, you only screw up once to give a kid semipermant issue. I met amazing parents that just one bad day they snapped refused for weeks to apologize, but time they did, and became "better" parents damage was done and kid had mild PTSD for like 6 years it heard some one shout and panicked because that one incident.
As a teacher, you should probably know the differences between your and you’re, and when each is appropriate to use.
No they don't its not something that will cost you much in life at all, no one is gonna fail you for that lol. People think that is the most important thing ever, had lazy teachers who didn't want to teach you better stuff, and you spent all day doing grammar drills instead of learning real skills lol.
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I used to work in a crisis unit for kids age 8-18. The worse kind of abuse was neglect. Even the kids who beaten still had a sense that they were loved somehow. Those who's parents didn't even acknowledge their existence were the ones with very deep seated issues. We also saw our hare of psychopaths. Schools usually had them admitted to us. Their parents all too often were controlled by the kid. We too often found when a child like that was planning violence, they were going to get rid of their family. These were too often the kids who were super smart in school. Thankfully we haven't seen any attacks by the worst kids. These are the ones who call school shooters pathetic. They tend to plot out a 100% death toll. Hint, they aren't into guns. They tend to excel at chemistry & physics.
I had both as a kid I spent most my child hood with long stents no super vision, no cares given unless somehting blewback on my dad. And when he was around he was abusive mentally and physically. But its family generationa trauma passed down so he learned from ones who abused him how to hid the signs, never hit me where would leave a mark people could see. I got dragged out in the yard when to little to beat with a belt, not spanked he hit me in the legs, back s**t one time he was so angry I caught a stray hit to the shoulder. But he took me out back and used me as punching bag telling me no one would believe me if I told on him, and only hitting me in the chest and stomach so no bruises or black eyes for others to see.
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You're a teacher and your grammar is this poor?.. I suppose they made a few good points but that really jumped out at me immediately...
Its ok grammar drills are more of a lazy English teacher thing. In grand scheme it doesn't make that much of a difference, you won't fail college if you just proof you work and do more then one rough draft. People think because their lazy English teacher focused on grammar drills its the only thing that matters in life lol.
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What does this comment even mean? Child abuse or neglect can, and unfortunately often does, happen everywhere. What should this teacher do, flee rather than try and help a child?
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Note: this post originally had 35 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
No one mentioned the person who never stops talking so you can’t get a word in. Makes you wonder when that talker even breathes.
Could mean a few different things: narcissism or some other ego issue, or someone overcompensating their shyness, someone on the autism spectrum, just to name three. I'm fairly certain you're referring to narcissism most likely though.
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When they're overly judgemental and cling to perceived 'general opinions ' instead of voicing their own opinions as such. And when they belittle your preferences or hobbies as childish and try to talk over you if someone asks you about them to 'explain' them before you can so everyone can see they are childish.
Someone who 'mansplains'. Please, I probably know more about engineering, cars, or livestock than you. So back off. I will ask questions if I want to know something. But don't mansplain to me.
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Some of these are so inconsequential. I would go with greed, ruthlessness, inability to be emotionally present. Just three of many. These are underlying personality defects, not just behaviors that result.
And then you get people raised right, but still doing this kind of thing. You only have to look at their siblings and parents to start wondering what's wrong with them.
Republicans, on the other hand, don't need to do anything. They can p**s people off just by existing.
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Well so far we know you have been raised right when you check grammar rather than content...kids can be raised right if the people raising them act right...it isn't what you say, it's what you do.
No one mentioned the person who never stops talking so you can’t get a word in. Makes you wonder when that talker even breathes.
Could mean a few different things: narcissism or some other ego issue, or someone overcompensating their shyness, someone on the autism spectrum, just to name three. I'm fairly certain you're referring to narcissism most likely though.
Load More Replies... When they're overly judgemental and cling to perceived 'general opinions ' instead of voicing their own opinions as such. And when they belittle your preferences or hobbies as childish and try to talk over you if someone asks you about them to 'explain' them before you can so everyone can see they are childish.
Someone who 'mansplains'. Please, I probably know more about engineering, cars, or livestock than you. So back off. I will ask questions if I want to know something. But don't mansplain to me.
Load More Replies... Some of these are so inconsequential. I would go with greed, ruthlessness, inability to be emotionally present. Just three of many. These are underlying personality defects, not just behaviors that result.
And then you get people raised right, but still doing this kind of thing. You only have to look at their siblings and parents to start wondering what's wrong with them.
Republicans, on the other hand, don't need to do anything. They can p**s people off just by existing.
Load More Replies... Well so far we know you have been raised right when you check grammar rather than content...kids can be raised right if the people raising them act right...it isn't what you say, it's what you do.
