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Someone Wondered “What’s A Sign That Someone Grew Up Poor?” And 30 Folks Online Delivered
According to the World bank, the number of people living below the poverty line in the world is gradually decreasing, but this is still far from enough to say there's been a serious improvement in the situation. On the other hand, several decades ago, everything was much, much worse.
Yes, if today in the world less than 10% of the population live below $2.15 a day, then forty years ago there were more than 40% of such people. In other words, almost half of the modern population of the globe grew in poverty. And, according to people in this recent viral thread, there are special behavioral patterns and signs by which such a person can be recognized.
More info: Reddit
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#1
In USMC recruit training we had a dude in our platoon who was homeless for an extended period of time before enlisting.
Every morning at zero dark thirty the DIs would come in turn the light on, screaming, total chaos to wake us all up…. Every single morning for the first thirty days or so of basic this dude slept right through it 😂. Kid said he was so comfortable in his little rack and hadn’t slept so good in a long long time. He was always exclaiming how good the food was at the chow hall. It put a lot of things in perspective for me.
LK 2 years ago
To save others from needing to search for the information, USMC is United States Marine Corp, and DI is Drill Instructor.
Lisa H 2 years ago
SDI is Senior Drill Instructor. I know it's not part of the post, I just felt like showing off in a stupid way.
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Sherry Richmond 2 years ago
My husband & I are Baby Boomers. He grew up in Working Class England & I was raised Upper.Middle Class in the Chicago suburbs, but our parents came of age during the Great Depression. We are retired with a 7-figure net worth but until recently we haven't been able to shake some of the habits caused by a fear of povery from this article. He still eats quickly & cleans every morsel on his plate. I have trouble throwing out anything & save moving cartons in my basement & garage. We both wear old clothes until they have holes in them. We aren't miserly & go out to nice restaurants & take luxury cruises, but some old habits die hard.
mutedtempest 2 years ago
Yeah, I was for a couple years during high school - parents kicked me out. I seriously considered joining the military for the stability of food and shelter, but then a recruiter told me type 1 diabetics can't serve xD Probably for the best!
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Skylar (they/them) 2 years ago
And I know that food sucks. Poor guy, nobody should be homeless.
Vermontah 2 years ago
I worked night shift (less brass around) Midnight chow was awesome. Biscuits and gravy, eggs any way you want them, bacon, sausage, . . .
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Lisa H 2 years ago
I guarantee he got quite a few IT (incentive training) sessions as well as his entire platoon at one point. Incentive Training is a form of punishment where you have to do a series of rigorous exercises in rapid succession while LOUDLY sounding off. They can go for anywhere from 30 seconds to 30 minutes, but they will feel like a lot longer. I maintain that anyone who says they never got IT'd in USMC boot camp is a big, fat liar. EVERYONE goes through it at least several times throughout boot camp. It's just part of it.
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RELATED:
#2
For me, I have what I call "poverty mentality", while I can afford new shoes and clothes, they have to be falling apart for me to replace.
RandomFrog(He/They️️) 2 years ago (edited)
I didn’t grow up super poor, but I still do this. My favorite pair of vans, had em for three years. Super glued the sole together , hand sewed the crease together a few times. Finnaly bought a new pair of shoes lmao. Idk why I do this but it saved me money for three years. EDIT:Wow, I’m honored, Finnaly been on BP long enough to get a spam bot reply lmao
RafCo (he/him/ele) 2 years ago
I had the same phone for 11 years, same laptop for 13 years, and I've been wearing my current pair of shoes for almost for years. They are canvas shoes with nice sized holes in them, but I think i can get another year out of them. I grew up with a lot of food insecurity, so I think this one makes sense
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Jeff Gabrisl 2 years ago
All of my "new" work shirts come from Goodwill, as does most of my clothes. The only things I buy new are socks underwear and footwear. I'm going on 3 years with my current pair of boots, so I probably should replace them soon, but they're navy surplus and still are holding up just fine, except for the gel insole.
Mike Fitzpatrick 2 years ago
I used to have to wear black pants for work so I waited until the 1/2 off at Goodwill or others and buy 5 pair at a time. Less than 20% what I'd pay for them at retail.
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David 2 years ago
(ex)Farm boy here. Hard for me to throw away old shoes and clothes because those are what I used to use for working on farm (and in garden). Stained? A small tear? perfect for cow poop and dirt. Now retired so weaning myself off that mentality but I still have more than I need.
MalP 2 years ago
Grew up middle class. Not rich, but no money to waste. Early married years were on the edge of poor. Still do this..
Jane Cortez 2 years ago
My parents grew up in the depression. Despite being quite comfortable financially there were little things like reusing teabags, hanging onto old clothes or repurposing things. The things they did but were excellent quality, thought out purchases. They spared no expense on food, were very generous but measured if that makes sense? Their philosophy is that money is an important tool because they lived through two World Wars. If I could sum them up it would be appreciative and prepared.
Sunny Day 2 years ago
2 years ago, I bought a pair of slippers. I liked them, and they were on sale, so I bought a second pair and stored them away. 1st pair got pretty worn, and started hurting my feet. I got the new pair out and put them on - but I couldn't bring myself to throw away the old ones. What if the new ones are too tight? What if they blah blah blah. The old ones are still sitting by the back door, until I can bring myself to toss them.
#3
Never buying clothing at full price. It just feels illegal.
Dominique Na 2 years ago
Absolutely and you buy off-season clearance. I teach my kids this too. Even if we have the money you only spend it on good shoes and coats so they last longer.
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Feeling rich for buying clothes that nobody else worn first ! That new I’m-the-first-owner for this blouse smell. And even then Half the time you’re able to buy new clothes….you don’t, you still end up going to Goodwill or St. Vincent de Paul because you know it’s 1/2 price Tuesday.
AnnaRachelle 2 years ago
I hardly ever pay full price for clothes for myself. I dress my tot out of the clearance section on next. Great quality clothes atleast half the original price. I have bought beautiful t shirts for £1.50. I was beoke for a long time back in my past. Shopping doesn't feel right without a sale
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Since the store can make money selling it a sale price, then that's the real price to me.
tuzdayschild 2 years ago
I didn't grow up poor at all but I try never to buy anything full price.
Blackstone 2 years ago (edited)
There are just too many options for getting good clothes without paying full price. I save "full price" for when I really want something special like a specific Tshirt print, and get the rest secondhand, mostly from family cleaning out their closets. I wear mostly black clothes (it's slimming and goes with everything) and just change accessories to make new outfits. I have probably 7 shirts and 3 or 4 bottoms I prefer to wear and I just mix and match. Then again though, I'm not a fashionista. I just want a flattering shape and to have my body covered in a way that's comfortable.
#4
They are normally more generous than people who grew up in rich families.
Der Kommissar 2 years ago
This is absolutely true, as pizza delivery drivers have many stories about poor people who tip (when they can) and rich people who tip a little or nothing at all. A good example is NY Yankees pitcher Andy Pettitte, who lives in a big-a*s mansion in Texas. He and his wife both reportedly tip $1
Vix Spiderthrust 2 years ago
Yeah. I used to deliver pizza, and one house on my patch belonged to a premier league footballer. Massive place, an old manor house with tennis courts. The only time he tipped was the one occasion he had friends round and they were watching him take the food off me.
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R Dennis 2 years ago
Yeah. I started delivering newspapers when I was 10. Started at 4am to get done before school. Did that for four years to help pay the bills. As the paper price went up, people paid the same amount and the good tips got smaller and smaller. So I had to deliver more and more papers - has to start at 2am when I was 12... I am now pretty well off, not rich but with plenty of investment money and disposable. I tip well anywhere I go. I donate to charities I have researched and know the money really goes to help others. I have very few needs and know what it is like to be trying your best and getting pushed down. My story isn't a pick yourself up story. I worked hard, got lucky, and had help... if I can pass along a little luck or help, I try wherever I can. People who always had money seem to assume they did the work to get it.
Rena w/hard a (ma can't spell) 2 years ago
Sadly it seems like the ones that are less well off usually think that wealthier folks only had to do the work of making it through the birth canal and into the "right" family, and the wealthier folks think that the less fortunate don't do any work at all. I don't think either is right or wrong. There's way too many twists and turns that feel insignificant at the time but can end up steering us in a direction we never saw coming, and those twists and turns can happen to anyone. True that some are born to families with a well laid and fairly clear path.....
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Ana Sabana 2 years ago
Actually if the workers are well payed, u dont Need to tip. Just when the Service was good
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Rena w/hard a (ma can't spell) 2 years ago
Exact words I said in a conversation a few days ago. Coworker was telling us about his nephews. One was very well off and his kids had everything but they were the greediest, and first to snatch toys from other kids. The other nephew wasn't well off but his kids offered up their toys to share with no complaints without being asked. Funny how those of us that have nothing seem to be the most willing to give everything when someone else is in need.
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AGoodStewart 2 years ago
Was in the casino business during the 90's, table games and management. Back then, everyone knew everyone in the business, didn't matter if you were in Vegas, Jersey, or one of the smaller casino locales. It was a network of gossip and It was widely discussed that the two highest paid basketball players (set records for endorsements) loved to go gambling together. They were the WORST tippers! I'm talking $2-5 on a $1000+ dinner tab, betting $20k+ a hand on 4-5 hands on a private table, thus up to $100k at a time, never tipped the dealers, at most tossing a couple of $1 chips on the beverage server's tray when brought a beverage, constantly wanting their ego stroked, just complete a******s! One was always referred to as, "No tippin' ....." His name rhymes with tippin. On the other end of the spectrum, once had John Daily come in, no he was not drinking, he lost over $500k and tipped almost every hand, win or lose, and was kind and gracious to everyone! 10 out of 10 genuinely nice!
Rahul Pawa 2 years ago
There are definitely people who became rich as an adult, and they often tipped well. People who didn't earn their wealth tip poorly, that is either they were born into a rich family or they mooch off a rich relative/friend.
Best Behave 2 years ago
This is backed up by all kinds of research, that less well of people give more to charities proportional to income, and, I seem to remember, in absolute terms as a group
guyx23 2 years ago
No. This is a gross generalization. Not being poor isn't mutually exclusive with generosity, there are plenty of kind rich people and plenty of shïtty poor - and vice versa.
R Dennis 2 years ago (edited)
I have seen cheap and selfish people across the financial spectrum. But those that show an entitlement are usually those who never had to worry about basic needs. Those who have been in the shoes of those less fortunate tend to empathize more because they have been sneered at for using food stamps or having cheap clothes. I think that is more their meaning... in the service industry over decades, I have come across my share of selfish, mean, and greedy people. In my experience those with money have been worse and more numerous than those without.
Load More Replies... #5
The mental struggle to buy anything and not feel guilty.
Benita Valdez 2 years ago
Oof. I have a $50 bill in my wallet from Christmas. I am 39 and still in the process of convincing myself to buy the stupid video game I want. Cleary it is a gift so it's ok but man have I been resistant to buying anything with it
Lauri Ceriani 2 years ago
I feel you. Every time I buy myself anything over $10, I end up taking it back, because you never know when you'll need that money. You Never Know.
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talliloo 2 years ago
mom was a single parent of three back in the day when divorced women weren't looked upon with any real respect. also, she was determined not to get any kind of social assistance which meant she had two jobs so she would come home from day job, take a shower and then go to the night job as an auditor. her sacrifices for her kids became ingrained in me when i had my own kid who is now 43. i made the comment to him that the little extra money i had inherited was being saved for him and his family when i go. he got so angry at me and told me that he didn't care if i spent every penny since i never bought anything for myself when he was growing up. so, now i give myself a spurge now and then but whenever i do get something for myself he is soooo happy.
R Dennis 2 years ago
I buy my wife things all the time. I rarely buy myself anything. If I do, it's fancy food to share or specifically for her or our kids (wagyu, champagne, imported madeleines). I will buy furniture or electronics for the house but not for me - they have newer Galaxy phones, I still use my BlackBerry... I am disabled and even buying myself a rollator (from an auction site at ¼ the price) makes me feel like I wasted money.
mutedtempest 2 years ago
I feel you. I don't have a family but I'll happily treat my friends to dinner or help them if they're struggling. Meanwhile I bought my phone used three years ago and am still using it, and most of my clothes have holes 😂 I'm blind and use a blind cane, and bought the cheapest one I could find on Amazon. Still felt guilty and it was maybe 25 dollars xD I'd love a fancy one but I'd feel terrible about it.
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Lizz 2 years ago
Oooooh yes...Due to circumstances I've lived in fear of bailiffs for so long that when I inherited some money and treated myself to some new clothes and shoes I felt guilty as f**k because I had spent it on myself and not paid off a small debt. I'm still battling debt -almost there- but at least I can last a few years without having to buy clothes or shoes
Duck's Shredder 2 years ago
This one hits hard, especially today. Now that I'm a young adult with a job, I simultaneously feel much more secure in being able to generate my own income, but also more aware of the pressure I put on myself when it comes to money. I struggle with the guilt of every little purchase, even food. Lately though I've been trying to get out of that. If I'm substantially under my budget for a purchase I'll get myself something small like a candy bar. On occasion like today I'll let myself splurge a bit and buy something bigger. It's still tricky though, I can feel the anxiety and guilt eating me alive. Sometimes I worry I'm going too far in the opposite direction.
LordSiravant 2 years ago
This is why poverty should be a crime against humanity. The generational trauma of fearing you'll never have enough to keep your family provided for, the chronic selflessness of sacrificing your own needs just to make sure others have enough leading to putting no value in yourself, thus making any purchase for yourself feel selfish and undeserved...human suffering makes me so angry, especially when I've experienced it personally.
Kelly Wallace Porter 2 years ago
I've needed new shoes for about a year now but I'm afraid to spend the money cuz it could go to my other bills.
tee-lena 2 years ago
I am disabled and spend a lot of time in a recliner. I need a new one so bad but life keeps getting in the way. So does the guilt. It's so much money!
Load More Replies... #6
Will eat all of the food on their plate, even after feeling full because they can't waste food.
Amy S 2 years ago
Flip side - I used to leave some of my meal even if I was still hungry so that I could have the rest the day after, otherwise there might not be anything to eat the next day.
Rahul Pawa 2 years ago
I see that as the same thing. The point is not letting food go to waste.
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R Dennis 2 years ago
My wife won't eat leftovers. That's a whole different thing... I eat leftovers for every meal until they are gone. The idea of wasting food is unfathomable. Sometimes it will be a week before I have a meal that isn't leftovers because I have to eat the older food first, even when meals are made every day.
Lyyyy 2 years ago
My mom had it instilled into her that everyday she had to cook something, and so the leftovers from previous day would go to waste. Now in my household we throw almost no food away. As means to achieve this, I sometimes even eat stir fry for breakfast. 😅 leftover food makes a nice snack.
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D. Pitbull 2 years ago
More accurately... you NEVER say "Yeah, just take it away" or throw it out. if you can't eat it, you pack it. You. Don't. Waste.
lubbaDubDub 2 years ago
At any buffet or free food event, eating only high value foods like meat, cheese, shrimp,etc. I'm not eating free potatoes or noodles
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Exactly ! I’m sorry but I’m eating stuff that I can’t afford myself !
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H G 2 years ago
I have a fierce protection against others eating from my food. I get angry, and at that quickly. I also eat very fast, and look like I shovel it in. Growing up we were si poor, I was having a eating competition with my sister every day to even have some. Our mother had to start giving us portions. We were skeleton thin, all three of us.
Lady Lestrange 2 years ago
Wasting food isn't normal. No matter rich or poor. Just take as much as you can eat. It's not that difficult.
Adam Forwood 2 years ago
Also free/unlimited food - I can't help myself. I feel like I have to take full advantage and eat as much as I can
#7
having a vast skill set! trust me, when you cant afford a repair man/hairdresser/seamstress/builder/roofer/welder/mechanic etc, you learn yourself.
LK 2 years ago
Or, if you don't have the skills, you know someone who does, and you can exchange favours.
R Dennis 2 years ago
I call them my apocalypse survival skills. Survivalists are just playing at what others live.
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to old to care 2 years ago
I am now 63 but growing up, my mother taught me to sew AND drywall, change out light fixtures, set toilets, build closets. I could change a tire or headlight at 16. My father was in the military (Vietnam) and was gone a lot and we never had any money for things - my mom was very self sufficient. I am so grateful for her.
Auntriarch 2 years ago
Absolutely. I come from a family of "how can I do that" not "who can I get to do that"
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Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
I cut my own hair. It ain't fancy but people say they like it. (They may just be being polite tho lol)
BluEyedSeoulite 2 years ago
I hate going to salons for them to not cut my hair the way I ask because it isn't the "trendy" style. They always cut it in a trendy way and I have to fix it at home anyway, might as well save money
Load More Replies... Jay Son 2 years ago (edited)
I was lucky enough to go to a vocational school where you do basically everything they have to offer during the first two years to help you pick your final profession for the final few years. As a result I learned a little bit of everything like metalworking, woodworking, plumbing, electricity, car mechanics, painting, cooking, restaurant waiting, construction, etc. All that stuff turned out to be super helpful now that I'm a homeowner (and what I don't know can be learned using YouTube lol). The flipside is that I've held many different types of jobs but never really found anything I could say I was happy to do :S
Luna Crow 2 years ago
How awesome to have a school that supports that varied a skill set! Bet you can mostly DIY, so less need to make money to get someone else to do things
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DennyS (denzoren) 2 years ago
I do woodworking, plumbing, electrical work, I can do concrete work, brick work, gardening...I cut my own hair at times...not a professional at any but I can do enough to get it done.
Devin Singh 2 years ago (edited)
Learned to sew just to tailor my own clothes. Used my mom's old sewing machine from the 70's. Learned to make so many things from scratch like pasta dough and puff pastry just to save space and money. As a weird side effect of being poor, I apparently dress nice and know my way around a kitchen. You get pretty good at remixing the same 5 or 6 pantry staples when that's all you've got.
LillieMean 2 years ago (edited)
There are actually repairs that require a professional and not just a friend and DIY videos. Bad work will be expensive later. I re-painted the window frames of a friend's detached house for a small fee and pizza, even though I'm a painter by profession. Bad work in the bathroom, for example, will cost way too much later. So,sometimes you have to say DDIY, don't do it yourself.
Carrie Laughs 2 years ago
I agree. There is plenty that you can learn and do yourself but with some things it can even be dangerous, a typical one would be electrics. How do you know the DIY video has it right for instance? There is a reason why some skilled trades have to pass exams, have regulations coming out their ears and their work is monitored by a professional body. Plus, in some countries if you don't get it signed off by an electrician it could be illegal. Be sensible with what you pick to have a go at!
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RandomFrog(He/They️️) 2 years ago
Ik certain colleges do courses for free if you’re in highschool, you just have to pay for materials. I’m gonna take cosmetics mechanics and business and it’s probs gonna cost $700 at the most compared to $4,000 each course plus supplies
#8
I'm really surprised I haven't seen "condiment drawer" here. When eating out, you save all of the unused condiments in a drawer. It took me until I was about 40 to finally recognize and stop hoarding ketchup and sauce packets.
Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago
I don't like chili sauce so when I eat two minute noodles, I just cut around that packet and store it in the pantry. For no good reason
Blackstone 2 years ago (edited)
I have large marinara sauce packs that came with the box of frozen cheese sticks, just sitting in the freezer because maybe I can use that later in cooking. When did I last cook with marinara sauce? Literally never because it gives me acid. But I'll probably keep it until it goes bad anyway. 🤷🏻♀️
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Amy S 2 years ago
Yep, plus napkins, salt, pepper and sugar for me. Ooh and those little UHT milks, still hard to walk past a bowl of them without grabbing a few.
Load More Replies... Amy S 2 years ago
I've been financially comfortable for years now but still have the urge to grab a handful of paper napkins when leaving a cafe, like we don't have paper towels at home.
Deborah THE Band 2 years ago
Stop that! Take all you're given... if you must. Do not filch extra!
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David H 2 years ago
I grew up middle class, and my family would save all the packets, and then send them in our bag lunches for school. It's not just a poor mentality, middle class does it too
Deborah THE Band 2 years ago
Wow. Your opinion that those below the "middle classes" are essentially of a lower intelligence is... or did you mean, "It's not merely a function of those living in poverty or in the lower economic strata." I guess you did not mean the lower the economic class the lower the intelligence level. Sorry. I'm looking at 70... not used to corporate/political speak in everyday conversations with 'not an idiot' folk.
Load More Replies... Andy Frobig 2 years ago
Closely related: I used to have a drawer so full of takeout napkins that I could barely close it
Jennie Brown 2 years ago
I do this haha I gather them up every few months and put them in the staff kitchen
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
I had to ban the sauce packet drawer about a year ago. Just recently discovered the "condiment sack" hidden in the garage...
#9
A personal anecdote:
For backstory, I'm the primary financial provider for my wife and I, but I really don't care what she does with our money. If our bills are paid and we have food to eat, I'm fine.
I grew up fairly poor, so I never really bought anything for myself, or asked for anything to be bought for me. A few months ago a video game I had wanted to play was on sale for like.... $2.50, and I said to my wife "hey, can I buy this?"
Not really because I wanted "permission" but because I hadn't logged in to check our financial state and didn't know if the money was already set aside for bills. But she looked at me and said "did you just ask permission to buy a $2.50 game with your own money?...."
So I'd say the hesitance to buy anything for yourself, regardless of how stupidly cheap it was.
MotherofGuineaPigs 2 years ago
My late husband did this, always asked if he could buy something (he was also the mayonnaise jar hoarder)
Blackstone 2 years ago (edited)
I'm just realizing how much of what I keep is governed by this. I legit have about ten cheap plastic serving trays from the dollar tree (a total $10 value) cluttering up my cabinets. Maybe I should let some things go...
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Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Oh wow. I have done this with nail polish. Walk around the store with it in my cart and ask my spouse if they thought it was okay if I got or did they think I was overspending….with my own damn money. Lol
doctorwho35 10 months ago
Meanwhile, I can justify £20 on a video game or takeaway, but not £20 for a t-shirt. Unless it's like 2 for £20
PitbullmomAF 2 years ago
My husband does this. He is overly generous with everyone, most especially my daughter and I, but he rarely buys anything for himself. He also will never eat minute rice ever again
#10
I grew up poor and my husband grew up middle class. Whenever we have guests, I am constantly asking people if they got ENOUGH food. "Is anyone still hungry? I can make something else!"
My husband will inquire about the quality of the food and if it is to everyone's liking. I think when you grow up poor, food is very much quantity over quality.
Roddfergg 2 years ago
My wife and I still feed anybody that comes to the house and we make enough that they could take some with them.
Michele Walker 2 years ago
I grew up knowing what REAL hunger and loneliness was. Once I had kids our house became know as the house that offered food and love; all you had to do was stop by.
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Foogle Phish 2 years ago (edited)
Lower class, food is about quantity... Middle class, food is about quality... Upper class, food is about presentation.
Niamh Nomen 2 years ago
My partner laughs (in a loving way, not cruel) at the food I'm happy to eat. I didn't even realise until recently that I eat weird stuff. But I grew up really poor and a lot of dinners were "whatever we have left in the cupboards" meals so I got used to eating some really weird combinations of food, just because I was happy to have it. Because there were days when there was nothing in the cupboards, so having plain spaghetti noodles and some green beans was a banner day!
David Gripon 2 years ago
I agree! In fact, I agree with most of these. I believe we would split our meal in half or more to someone who doesn't have food. Whether it be a coworker who forgot or couldn't afford lunch to someone on the street.
Midoribird Aoi 2 years ago
Grew up poor, and Mom still fed all our friends who came in the door. Especially when I was young, my older siblings having many friends who were always welcome to swing by for a sandwich, ramen noodles, soup, or whatever else a poor family would have on hand. Very simple poor people food, but nobody left hungry. All family members still have this trait to this day.
Courtney Christelle 2 years ago
If you stop by at dinner I'll always invite you, claiming I always make too much. And then will open quietly another can of vegetables.
Mary Catherine Ryan 2 years ago
I didn't grow up poor, my family was upper middle class, but my parents always asked guests who ate at our house if they had, had enough. My great grandmother use to, too. I now do it whenever I cook. It's just that we don't want anyone leaving our table hungry, especially children. Where I'm from, we believe in feeding people, so we always make more than enough, and let our guests take home whatever they want to eat later. We just consider it good manners, that's just how us Southerners are.
#11
I went without food sometimes when I was growing up. It took a long time before I stopped hoarding food once I could afford it. My husband always commented on how long it would take me to go through the chocolate he would bring back from his international trips. I was always afraid it would be the last time we could get it and would make it last as long as humanly possible. I am quick to shut down spending and I am much better at saving money than my husband. I also keep our heat set at 63 for the day and I am usually the last in the neighborhood to turn on our air conditioning. I still shop sales and I don’t understand things like renovating a perfectly fine kitchen just because you don’t like the color of the countertop or cabinets.
Shelby Moonheart 2 years ago
One of my nephews was adopted into our family when he was three. My SIL said it took him a long time to stop hoarding food and realize he would get fed at the next meal.
Raven Red 2 years ago
I'm sixteen, adopted at seven, and I still catch myself hoarding food lol.
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ravn 2 years ago
My version is the ironic habit of hoarding "good" and "special" treats until they go bad.
Lyyyy 2 years ago
My version is hoarding them, thinking happily I won’t run out for a while, and like some dark magic they’re gone by next week…
Load More Replies... Raimei Ai 2 years ago
I grew up raising my lil sis and by the time I was 3 I was so malnourished I was skin and bone and my blonde hair was whiter than granny white, brittle, and I looked like a dandelion ready to spread it's seeds with my little white afro... Because I would always give her my food and only eat what she left behind and sometimes that was nothing. After I was adopted at 7 I started to be greedy with my food. Never wasting anything. Now I'm on the other end of the scale but finally getting it under controle. Still over 200... But getting there...
Yenu 2 years ago
Happy that your story changed, I hope you are better now and how is your sister?
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Anony Mouse 2 years ago
I grew up hungry and I hoard food. I have two fridges, a chest freezer, an upstairs pantry and a downstairs pantry. I just need to know that I have food around. And boy did all that come in handy when the pandemic hit! Validation!
Nancy Martin 2 years ago
demolishing a perfectly good kitchen and replacing it with the latest style is beyond irresponsible - at least donate the older stuff if you must spend your money
Seth 2 years ago
Habitat for Humanity and similar organizations are great for that; they'll reclaim just about anything. Normally when a room is updated, the reno company destructively removes the old stuff and it goes straight to a landfill.
Load More Replies... Marie Dahme 2 years ago
I had a second bedroom in my home devoted to extra pantry items that I rotated around. When the pandemic hit, food wise I was ready for several months.
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
Conversely, I've learned how to alter my own counters and cabinets if/when I want to. I can't fathom paying someone else thousands to do it for me. With my few experiences with contractors being hot trash anyways I don't particularly want to, either.
#12
Lack of exposure to cultural events. missing out on experiences that others may take for granted, such as attending concerts, traveling, or participating in extracurricular activities.
SlothyK8 2 years ago
I tried out to be a cheerleader and made the squad. I was shocked and had to back out. I lied, saying that i'd hurt myself and my doctor has told me not to join, but the truth was that my parents could barely afford a pizza now and then, much less several hundred dollars worth the cheerleading gear. I never told them.
RandomFrog(He/They️️) 2 years ago (edited)
I go to a charter school and it costs litterally $1,000. And that doesn’t cover the uniform/cheer outfit costs (there’s three for certain weathers) and cheer merch like water bottles and bags. Some people think it’s reasonable but $1,000 f*****g dollars??!?
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Kate Jones 2 years ago
Going to a concert has never been something I could ever do. I'm 43 and I'm not poor (not rich either but I could afford an occasional concert now). But it just seems so extravagant or a waste of money. I really regret not doing those things now. And because I never did a lot of that stuff, I found that I was a little scared to go to these things for fearing being out of place or like I wouldn't feel comfortable. And I always have to use my GPS because I never had a good car before, so I never really drove around to find new places. So in the past 5 years I got my first newer car, so I just started driving and it's been eye-opening. Things I didn't realize were even 20 or 30 miles away that I could have been doing and going to but just never did because I couldn't afford it for so long. I feel like I'm rediscovering the area I live in.
ί𝔫ＣίŦᵃт𝐔𝐬 2 years ago
Back before the mid 90s or so, concerts were very affordable; you could go see a big name show (at least in my genre of music) for $20 or less. Now, some new 17 year old like Billie Eilish is charging $400 per ticket. Having concerts taken away is the biggest shame about using whatever disposable money we might have.
Load More Replies... Linda Lee 2 years ago
In 9th grade I won an scholarship for a two week art summer camp. My art teacher sat down beside me to tell me about it. The only catch was, I needed $200 for food at this camp. I looked at him and shook my head with tears in my eyes. He understood. I never told my parents.
Jeff Gabrisl 2 years ago
I couldn't join the swim team in HS because the school didn't have its own pool, and it was $200 a season to join the swim team because they used some other facilities. On the other hand, there was a kid in high school who was sponsored for wakeboarding. I couldn't join the swim team for financial reasons, but some rich kid gets paid to have fun... That is something I will never understand.
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Me too. Never got a chance to see a Duran Duran concert back in the day or go on trips with the school because you had to have lunch money plus pocket money. There was no way that Was gonna happen. Just stayed home sick.
Sunny Day 2 years ago
We never did any of that. My dad's idea of a vacation was - take a week off work and paint the house. If an activity cost money, you knew they would say "no". First time I went on vacation, my brother and I went to the beach with our neighbors. Nothing fancy, tents & outdoor showers, but we were in heaven.
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
In Wyoming, summer vacation meant…hey kids we’re gonna go camping ! Yay . But when we’re really gonna do is cut as much firewood as we could the entire summer, then stack all the cords of wood on the truck with chains and cum-alongside….then bring wood home….Split it with either the auger on the back end of the tractor or use a mallet and a flat head axe to split. Took months to do. Even my five year old sister picked up small pieces of kindling and put in in a bucket. All so we didn’t freeze in the winter as we didn’t have a gas or electric heater. Just two old coal stoves. So while we had coal in the coal house…we still had to cut firewood every. Damn. Summer. I was 16 with callouses on my hand that rivaled any 40 year old man. Word. Lol
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Widdershins66 2 years ago
I never, ever put myself forward for school trips, holidays, music, sports etc because I knew my parents could not afford them. They never knew because I simply NEVER told them.
Alex Martin 2 years ago
Same. Quit band in fifth grade because I wasn't about to ask my mom who was working two jobs to pony up $10 for the music book for the next level.
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Nurichwersonst 2 years ago
My mom buys concert tickets for me (and her) so i get out of my shell from time to time. I'd never spend 100€ for a ticket as a single mom... So grateful for having her. 🥰
Little My 2 years ago
My friends all went on a residential school trip, nothing fancy but it looked like fun. I pretended I didn’t want to go even though my friends were desperate for me to go saying it would be fun. I knew my mum would skip meals to pay for it if I went so I pretended to not be interested. The week at school where they were all gone, the ones that didn’t go had to attend pretty empty classes, someone said to me ‘why didn’t you go with your friends, is it because you’re poor’ in a nasty sneering way. I’m nearly 40 and I still remember feeling crushed by the comment.
LordSiravant 2 years ago
God, just envisioning that evil sneer and that smug, self-superior tone fills me with so much anger on your behalf. I'm sorry you didn't get to experience good times with your friends and were left with jerks who wanted to make you feel worse so they could feel better themselves.
Load More Replies... Rusty 2 years ago
I struggle to make my daughter's marching band fees. They're a minimum of $600 a year. I see other parents paying it all at once, and have literally sat in my car crying because I feel like I'm a horrible dad and a very crappy provider. I'm disabled and still try to do anything I can to make money but companies won't hire me because of my disability
Cheyanne Pavan 2 years ago
You're a good man and incredible father and that's what's most important in life. I know it doesn't help your financial situation, but your daughter will always feel loved and supported in all she does, which is something money could never buy.
Load More Replies... #13
When I was in elementary school a girl asked me why all my shirts were just solid color and not brand name logo shirts. Made me feel insecure. So im going to go with an obvious answer here, clothing and style. I still wear my clothes until they have holes and stains. I have the money to buy new brand name clothes, but why. I'm not trying to impress anyone.
User# 6 2 years ago
I never understood why people would go around looking like a bill board for clothing brands.
Sapna Sarfare 2 years ago
i use all my shirts till they have holes. Then they become house clothes if with negligible holes. And when cannot be worn, cloth for cleaning... be smart
Carrie Laughs 2 years ago
Same. Good casual going out clothes which then become dog walking clothes (I live in the country - there's a lot of mud!), become 'wear in the house' clothes that are at least not going to terrify the postie. They then become gardening/decorating clothes... finally rags for cleaning!
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Killing_Time_At_Work 2 years ago
at school i remember a girl 13years old crying because her mother wont buy her $200 shoes i was poor growing up but being poor and watching my mother raise 3 girls on her own and struggle for food and bills made me a stronger person and to this day i tell my mother how proud i am of her for doing her best i wouldnt change it for the world
Jason 2 years ago (edited)
I got made fun of for wearing the same shirt 2 days a week and the same pair of jeans most of the week. I used to dread the first day of school cause I would have the same clothes as last year and all the other kids would be comparing the new stuff they had that year.
Load More Replies... Jay Son 2 years ago
I recently read an article where it was said that truly rich people would not wear anything showing brand names (to clarify, they do wear brand clothing but just not noticable by a big logo), and that people who do were often basically posers.
Elizabeth Tayler 2 years ago
I think clothing etc covered with brand logos to be extremely tacky.
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KnightOwl 2 years ago
I'll never understand why people spend the money on designer clothes when the can get very similar items without the brand name on them for a fraction of the price. It seems to be all about impressing other people rather than actually enjoying the things themselves. I'd rather spend my money having fun with the people I love or on hobbies I enjoy than trying to show off how much money I have to a bunch of people I don't care about.
David 2 years ago
I have NEVER understood paying more for (item) to have a brand name plastered on (item). Race car drivers and golfers GET PAID to wear brand names and logos. A lot of average folks pay the company instead. Grew up fairly poor. Many of my clothes were second hand long before that was a trendy thing. Now I can afford brand names if I want (I guess) but I don't want.
Der Kommissar 2 years ago
I went to a high school that had mostly rich kids. We were poor. One asked me once why I wore the same jacket every day. Thanks, Lon.
Kenneth Brown 2 years ago
I've got Carhartt shirts that are literally old enough to vote. They're not very presentable any more, but they're great if I need to do anything where I am gonna get dirty. I know Carhartt is more of a fashion statement now, but back when I bought them, I considered them an investment.
#14
Odd hoarding behaviours of things you probably should have gotten rid of out of fear you won’t be able to replace them easily. I keep a stack of boxes broken down because there’s still this fear in the back of my mind that I’ll have to move again at a moment’s notice. I make a decent salary now and have lived where I am for nearly 7 years, but I still can’t part with those boxes despite the space they take up. Under the bed, behind the chest of drawers… Yeah. I still have ‘em.
MotherofGuineaPigs 2 years ago
Mayonnaise jars, or any jar that has a good lid. Have to go on a jar purge every 6 months or so.
deejak 2 years ago
Agree, except for the purge part. Mine get tossed when I'd rather not clean them again, not when they're clean. It feels good to throw things out on *my* terms.
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Heze Alii 2 years ago
Better to have it and not need it then need it and not have it. The mantra of all "collectors".
Luna Crow 2 years ago
In many cases this is true! Also in some cases it's true of the space being used by useless junk
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Kate Jones 2 years ago
I do the same thing. I kept all of my moving boxes from my last move. Those things can get expensive but, I agree, I never expect to stay anywhere too long.
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Bread tie wrappers. Empty laundry detergent box cut in half for dryer lint. Saving empty bread wrapper bags to use to wrap food in for the fridge. Jelly jars as juice jars. Clean empty gallon milk jugs for Kool-aid or tea since we didn’t have a pitcher. Rationing sugar when using it for Kool aid because it’s expensive. Rinsing out the shampoo bottler and conditioner bottle with water til it’s absolutely empty. Never brand name anything. Knowing what the white block of government cheese tastes and no matter how bad it tastes you still get excited bechwy it’s food. Having to go hunting, foraging, and fishing in the fall so you don’t starve in the winter. Cakes were homemade and had on rare occasion, never had a bakery made cake til I was an adult.
Jessica N 2 years ago
The government cheese that was great on bread but somehow never melted in oven! And portioning out of that giant black and white box of macaroni and cheese
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Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
I have a yearly event now, where I burn all of the boxes that have gathered up in our house. Usually Halloween. It's very cathartic.
#15
Enjoying cinnamon, sugar, and butter on a slice of bread because we couldn't afford sweet treats 🥲 it low-key slapped though
MaryHadaLittleLamb 2 years ago
This is my comfort food! My mom always made this for me when I was little and it's so good.
David 2 years ago
I grew up with this and never thought of it as a poor people thing (though we were). It just tastes yummy. A fact not missed by some brands of cereal. I'd still eat it now except my current diet limits fat and sugar.
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
I make cinnamon toast all the time. Just remember cinnamon and other spices used to be expensive! So enjoy your cinnamon snack. It's probably better for you than Little Debbie's anyhow (less sugar and preservatives!)
rodger coghlan 2 years ago
YES! This was my desert also - I used to lick around the blades when making smoothies (I was 63 before I stopped doing this but I am still tempted)
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
Or, peanut butter and regular butter with a bit of honey whipped together. It does indeed slap still.
Deborah THE Band 2 years ago (edited)
Cinnamon, sugar and butter on bread.... Fool, that IS a sweet treat. It is a sweet treat my grandchild asks for! Where did he get this odd, ancient habit?! His parents! Guess where they learned a out sweet treats! ----- An aside: WTF does "...it low- key slapped" mean in English? Anyone!?
#16
I'm a foster kid. I was always poor and pretty much had nothing. These are habits I have.
I hoard food. They're still edible if they're past their expiration date as long as it's not mouldy or something. My basement is stocked for a zombie apocalypse.
I never throw out old containers unless they're mouldy or something, clean that s**t out, good as new.
I also always have leftovers. I never waste food and eat everything on my plate.
I feel guilty when I buy something I don't necessarily need.
I add water to "empty" soap containers so they're full.
I cut "empty" toothpaste tubes so I get every last drop.
I reuse a lot of stuff. The "disposable" stuff don't need to be disposed most of the time. You can reuse them.
RandomFrog(He/They️️) 2 years ago
You should get one of those paint rollers. You stick the end of toothpaste or pain tube and it rolls it up all tight so you get every last drop. Saves me a lot of time and is so much more convenient than cutting them open.
moon_magic 2 years ago
I just put the tube on the counter and use the toothbrush handle like a roller to force the dregs up the tube
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ProcrastinationStation 2 years ago
Ok, but cutting toothpaste tubes, shampoo bottles etc might also be a sign of "less waste" life. Producers might be wasteful with their stupid packaging - I refuse to be ;p
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
Just means you've grown up to be a thrifty adult. Just be careful not to turn into a hoarder. Old mayo jars and plastic butter tubs are useful, but you don't need more than 5 of them at a time 🙂
Mooooomooooo 2 years ago
I think everyone should stop being so wasteful and be more like this person. Still sad about the reason why they're like that though
Foogle Phish 2 years ago
Reusing plastic utensils. My family used to do it and it always made me feel ghetto. My wife will sometimes do this and it really bothers me.
Mary Kelly 2 years ago
both my parents grew up poor...they both did every one of these...as did their siblings...hell, my aunt still washes and bakes egg shells, and then breaks them up for the garden...she also saves every bit of "veggie juice" and every little left over vegetable in the freezer in long, circular containers, which she hten adds to for weeks...they look like artic ice core samples...when it's full, she uses it as stock for soups...now it is ecofriendly, but when you think about the effort that goes into it...wow!
Margot Parker 2 years ago
I make - compost soup- which is from all the veggies, carrot eeling, onuon and potato skins, mushroom and herb stema, leftover bones. All I the pot, cover and boil that stuff for a couple of hours. Best stock ever
Load More Replies... Marie Dahme 2 years ago
We used to take the small pieces of soap bars and melt them in hot water to make our own liquid hand soap. Or boiling our hairbrushes in a special pot with a capful of bleach because we couldn’t afford to buy new ones when they needed to be disposed of. Keeping a small basket of free samples that we got from free offers and mail flyers. Usually shampoo pa jets , laundry detergent packets or dryer sheets.
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
I buy one large container of dish soap at Home Depot. I then split it 4 even ways into other dish soap bottles. Half soap, half water. Lasts the entire year. Don't bother with a dishwasher, even when we had one. Honestly works great.
Brenda 2 years ago (edited)
I got this plastic thing with a slot for emptying toothpaste tubes. They also make keys for this. I now have decent storage containers, but keep tins and bowls for craft supplies storage.i stockpile lots of things, too. I bought dollar store divided plates and use leftovers to make freezer meals. Great for easydinners & lunches, sometimes send them home with my kids.
#17
Scanning the menu for the cheapest options possible when at a restaurant. “It’s ok the soup is really enough for me”
Mary Kelly 2 years ago
we were trained that this is the polite thing to do if someon else is paying, and i did this even when i was paying well into my 30s.
RandomFrog(He/They️️) 2 years ago
My mom grew up poor and when going out to eat she loves looking at the menu cuz as a kid her parents just got her whatever was cheapest in the kids menu
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
Folks like to complain about adults buying the chicken tenders or off the kid's menu. But usually that's the cheapest.
Vicente Carmi 2 years ago
I think my family is just above middle middle class but not upper middle class. Whenever we go to a restaurant or shopping I'm always worried about how much my mom is spending and won't get an "expensive" option and try to stay between 10-17 dollars. Max 20. Or if we go shopping and I need something for whatever I won't say anything. I'm always so worried about her spending since I was little for literally no reason. Maybe it's self-esteem issues whenever someone spends money on me, I don't know.
Tuna Fish 2 years ago
Oooh I feel this comment. I remember when my friends from my first year at college would go out to eat and invite me, I would always suggest the Widow Watson's restaurant because I knew it was up to their standards and they had an onion soup with unlimited crackers for like $5. If I ordered water to drink and nothing else I could pitch in about $8 and cover my part. ($10 was usually my entire eating budget for the day and I could get student breakfast for $2)
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
So for the good friends who genuinely want to treat their friends here's what you do: cater an event at your house/community center. That way you know you've provided to your friends AND they feel less awful about feeling like they're taking advantage of you in a way they can't reciprocate. Take my word, this is the best of both worlds.
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
ESPECIALLY if they tell me I can have "Whatever I want"... Some people will actually get upset with you for this, though.
doctorwho35 10 months ago
Asking if it's "okay" for me to have the cheapest thing on the menu if someone else is paying. As if a £6.99 gammon, egg and chips is going to break their bank. Wanted a large mixed grill plate, once. It was £16.99, asked my dad if it was okay/I was allowed to have it... He said "Yes, so long as you eat it all." Getting so full from the big meal, because your eyes are bigger than your head, so asking for a 'doggy bag' to take home the leftovers, so you don't waste food (especially if expensive) and you have a meal the next day.
Janice Seagraves 2 years ago
I used to do that. Now I can eat off the senior menu and save more money.
#18
- Being hypersensitive to any light left on, door left open, opening the fridge too much, running water too long, etc, because you’re trained to minimize utilities.
- Never pouring more than 1/2 a glass of any drink when at someone else’s house (except water) because you don’t want to be seen as wasteful/gluttonous.
- Making weird snacks out of food that isn’t supposed to be a snack - ex. Eating dry ramen noodles like chips, koolaid with sugar and your finger to make your own fun dip, eating Kraft cheese slices/cold hotdogs/other things that are normally just a part of a meal.
Shelby Moonheart 2 years ago
"Eating dry ramen noodles like chips, koolaid with sugar" are some of my favorite things but I didn't grow up poor.
Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Making sweets out of tortillas, chocolate chips, peanut butter and mini marshmallows microwaves. Or if we had a left can of pie filling from the holidays….tortillas and pie filling in the microwave. Or at a mini party with family, making mixed drinks out of a 3 liter bottle of apple soda mixed with bourbon with maraschino cherries and calling it Juicy Applejazz.. poor people get creative when they need to.
lubbaDubDub 2 years ago
Taking a one minute shower or even getting wet, turning off the water, soaping up, then quicky rinsing and getting out.
Jeff Gabrisl 2 years ago
Hear me out: sliced hot dogs on crackers! We always had hot dogs, but didn't always have bread, but we always had saltines. It's so good, and if you add a little bit of cheese you swear that you're eating one of those fancy hor d'oeuvres you see on the front of the Ritz box
Jan 2 years ago
My mom always did this with canned Vienna sausages. She would heat them in a pan with a little butter, then we spread them on saltine crackers.
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boredkitten 2 years ago
The first one definitely, also when turning on tap water, I am very conscious of using as little flow as possible.
Jessica N 2 years ago
I did all of this. Plus snacking on frozen corn, it's surprisingly sweet and good frozen. We had a vegetable packing place in town and my.mom had a friend who worked there and gave us a lot of unsellable bags. I still have a huge affinity for frozen vegetables in weird ways, smashing peas on crackers
Pammer R 2 years ago
Yeah, your "weird snacks" are what a lot kids snacked on because they are kids and think that it's delicious! I remember eating frozen hot dogs out the freezer when at a friends when I was 5! My 21 year old son with still eat the hot dogs raw while waiting for cooked ones!
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago (edited)
"Eating dry ramen like noodles are chippos, Koolaid with sugar to make my own dippos, rolling cold lunch meat with cheese slices for wings, these are a few of my favorite things!" 🎉🎶
#19
In the US I’d say poor dental history or teeth - dental work is a luxury
Overall, I’d say many hoarders grew up poor because they are so afraid of not having something if they’ll need it so they keep everything
Tucker Cahooter 2 years ago
My dad was like that. Grew up in the Depression, the son of a widow. Never threw out any scrap piece of metal or wood. I've inherited that trait too.
Vix Spiderthrust 2 years ago (edited)
My dad-in-law's the same. Grew up just after WWII, there was still rationing in his early years. Can't get him to walk past a skip until he's checked it for nice bits of wood.
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Kate Jones 2 years ago (edited)
Yes. I've never been to a dentist in my life and I have cavities that are bothering me. Th crazy thing is I now have dental insurance (basic plan that I got through my job. I could get a few free cleanings and some basic care) but I don't go because I'm so embarrassed that I've never gone. I know dentists probably don't care but ...I don't know. I'm paying for it so I should just get over it and go but...I just grew up in a house where you didn't go to doctors unless you were dying.
Widdershins66 2 years ago
Pride cometh before a fall. Please go to the dentist, Kate, before those bothersome cavities become life threatening. Heart disease can be linked to poor dental care. They might hurt you now but they'll only get worse and the pain will literally drive you mad. Prevention is better than cure. Bite the bullet, Kate, you're worth it 💖
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Jake W 2 years ago
Truth. My grandma had her teeth removed at the age of thirty because she had regular issues and dental work was too expensive.
tee-lena 2 years ago
Same. My disability causes chronic acid reflux and vomiting. It just ate my teeth. I suffered so much pain until my state started Dentical. I have full dentures and am so grateful. My mom has issues but needs a surgery that Dentical won't pay for. So she's got almost no teeth. The ones she has are broken, infected and painful. It's screwing with her heart. No idea what to do.
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BluEyedSeoulite 2 years ago
I have 3 wisdom teeth that need removed and a cavity filled. I was quoted as needing a partial crown by the last greedy dentist I went to a year ago. I've been postponing and working up the courage to go to another dentist for another opinion and just not chewing sweets on one side...
lubbaDubDub 2 years ago
I didn't go to the dentist till I was 35, married with a child and huge house. I didn't know you were supposed to
Upstaged75 2 years ago
My dad didn't get the braces he desperately needed (his teeth were REALLY crooked) until after he got married to my mom. His family could never afford them.
R Dennis 2 years ago
I didn't go to a dentist until I was in my mid 20s... luckily my teeth were pretty good. I only ever had two cavities (one in a wisdom tooth). I have a friend who needs all their teeth removed...
Lyyyy 2 years ago
This is so unbelieveable to me. The dental care in my country is free for minors, and also compulsory. Some parents have been sentenced to pay fines and compensation to their kid, and in some cases, even probation for badly neglecting their childs dental care, like not brushing their teeth and not taking them to a dentist and the kids teeth have rotted.
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kelly walker 2 years ago
I have terrible teeth, but not from lack of dentistry. CPTSD and chronic anxiety leading to an insufferable nail biting habit got that done.
#20
Sentimentality. Not that wealthier people can't be sentimental.
But my dad, whose parents grew up in the rural South during the great depression, wants to keep every little thing of my mom's. Everything.
He would prefer to keep her bedroom as is.
I always wondered why he wanted to keep it like that. But then I realized, the only thing we have left is my mom's ashes in an urn.
There was no funeral, no memorial, (she didn't want any and there was no one to come anyways) no tombstone. Nothing that feels tangible, personal, etc.
We don't have the luxury of beautiful personal mausoleums, or headstones, or anything else in the Western death culture.
My mom's bedroom, and all her stuff is the closest we will ever have to a memorial for my mom. It's a tomb, without a body in it.
KMill 2 years ago (edited)
Similar thing happened when my son died. They kept making typos on his baptism certificate. They were getting frustrated with me for requesting so many corrections until I reminded them that he was baptized in the hospital and he died a few hours later. I don’t have a lot of mementos so it’s important that the few I have are at least spelled correctly.
Carrie Laughs 2 years ago
They were frustrated with you for their mistakes??? At such a tragic time? Good grief!! The very least they should be is patient and understanding that of course you want accuracy. I'm so very sorry.
Load More Replies... BluEyedSeoulite 2 years ago
A crappy aunt made a comment about how my mom doesn't have a tombstone on her grave a few years after her death. Honestly, my mom wouldn't have cared and would be angry that we wasted thousands of dollars on a stone marker when there is a metal one there and thst money could be better used for her grandbabies. Everyone who loves her knows where to find her anyway. F U, Kelly.
Jamie Cassetta 2 years ago
Oh wow. I hadn't thought of that. For my kids. I don't plan on even being cremated for them, just a body donation to whatever local medical school is close because I live with whichever son needs me in the moment... I do crochet for them though. All sorts of things. So there's that. I'm lucky, and feel so appreciative that I have so much love in my relationship with my boys and their kiddos because my biological mother was such an abusive monster. She and my dad lived an above middle class life, with a very good income until my dad left her after she directly threatened his life. But even before then she treated me like a slave, with food restrictions, barely any clothing, and no toys. The one exception were the educational fun workbooks my dad would get me from his travels. She couldn't object to those. To this day I find myself not really caring about how I dress, or how I eat, except that I love to cook, and learn skills that most would describe as homestead or survivalist ones. My
Jan 2 years ago
I lost my mother 5 years ago, and I cherish every beautiful blanket and throw she made me over my life. I actually cried when I saw a hole in one of them and I'm researching how to repair it. I really love that she made multiple baby blankets to put away "just in case". I used the blue ones she made for my son's, but pulling out the pink ones pit away in her hope chest for my daughter born 2 years after my momhad died? I even had her newborn photos made with one of them because it felt like part of mom was there that way. I'm so sorry your mother didn't appreciate the gift you were. I hope your family cherishes your handmade art.
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Burgermeister 2 years ago
Go to findagrave dot com and register her (you can do that even if there's no burial plot anywhere) so she won't be forgotten.
O'Dessa Bourque 2 years ago
Even when I'm gifted something practical, like clothes, it means so much to me. Hell, my fella came back from an appointment the other day, and gave me a Baconator! Bacon is my love language ( ◜‿◝ )♡(≧▽≦)
MoKa 2 years ago (edited)
I don't think that's about being poor. My parents passed away a couple of years ago, but whenever I visit their graves (a few times a year back in the hometown) I don't feel any connection with those tombstones. It's their house that keeps their memories for us. We have kept it just like back then because it still feels good and warm and safe. Instead of her grave, it's her colorful shirts hanging in the closet that wets my eyes, which she sewed herself or had her friend tailor make it for her. It's his all kinds of tools and papers that he would keep. And it's so much that even though we've been trying to throw away or sell some stuff, we still haven't made a dent into that huge number of items everywhere around the house and in the basement.
#21
I was told recently I was crazy for using bread instead of hot dog buns. That's just something I always did as it's what we had. Burgers, hotdogs all bread fellas.
Kathi Firns-Hubert 2 years ago
I looked forward to my mom's fried bologna because it was a break from the usual lunch.
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Kate Jones 2 years ago
If you fry the bread in a pan in butter on one side, then fold it and use it as a bun, it doesn't taste any different that a hot dog or burger bun. Not sure if they are sold all over the country but we have New England style hot dog buns here in the northeast US which are basically just that. They're meant to be fried on both sides. Delicious!
Teresa Spanics 2 years ago
You are NOT crazy. A slice of bread makes an excellent hotdog bun as you can put the ketchup, etc. on it and roll the hotdog up in it.
Jamie Greco 2 years ago
We did that too. When I got married my husband insisted on the appropriate bread for hot dogs, hamburgers, etc. I still don’t get it. Bread is bread.
Kathy Lonergan 2 years ago
Buns are just too much bread anyway. A corn tortilla with a hot dog is a yummy low cal alternative to a corn dog.
Naomie Moore 2 years ago
I still do that! And I wasn't food poor growing up. I like a random patty melt, rye bread - yum! Now I want one!
#22
There's quite a bit, I didn't see them in myself until I was an adult and went to therapy.
1. Lack of basic wellness, e.g. no primary care doctor or dentist. Rationalizing this because there's a "financial cost" to it.
2. Serious guilt from buying anything you don't absolutely need. It's a feeling of "you don't deserve this" or "you're being stupid to ever want something".
3. Working yourself to death because of a serious insecurity about "returning to poverty"; my therapist called this the "never again" work ethic, it's toxic.
4. Eating your food so fast like you will never have another meal again. It's a sign of food insecurity growing up. My fiance pointed this out to me that I did this, and it clicked when I talked with my therapist about it. It's very common
5. General anti establishment beliefs. The system failed you, so it's hard to trust something that put you through abuse. This can manifest in bad financial literacy, or lack of belief in banks/stock market, etc.
Kate Jones 2 years ago
I do number 4 but it's not because of growing up poor. It's honestly a habit picked up from every job I've ever had where your break is 1/2 hour and you have to hurry up. Also, my father has always been selfish where it came to eating out. If we were at a restaurant and he was done...we were all done. He wanted to leave as soon as he was done and so sometimes we didn't get to finish. Or we weren't allowed to talk because it would take us too long to finish eating. So I also ate fast because of that. I wrote in another post here recently that a friend of mine watched me eat and said I ate like I was in prison.
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
"Eating your food superfast because someone else at the table will gladly steal it from you otherwise." Or " Grandma has given us 10 minutes to eat and then we have to be locked back outside again. So we have to eat as fast as we can AND use the toilet before getting locked back out." Yes, my Grandma was a monster, thanks for noticing.
Dizavid 2 years ago
I'm just gonna call it that BP readers all grew up in the same neighborhood; we all in here "Oh that's me...I didn't even realize..." It's really...eye opening how many times I've said it myself. Really didn't realize just how many subtle ways poverty effects you. Mostly bc you're usually too busy worrying about the *less* subtle effects.
LordSiravant 2 years ago
Not the same neighborhood, but definitely the same deeply flawed society.
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Ray Arani 2 years ago (edited)
All of the above. I was middle class but spent my teens homeless periodically thanks to an abusive situation at home. Abusers out of the family now, mostly, and my family is still middle class but I spent my entire teens and early twenties with no consistent contact or support. My family is often baffled about these behaviors of mine, particularly the food issues, because they grew up middle class too. My mother can't understand why I shop, store food, and eat the way I do, and it's all my will power not to be like, "because I was no longer welcome to eat or even live at home after age 13!" Like how does she not at least remember that they stopped feeding and housing me? She asked me to help with her budget to help her save money at one point and I tried, but she was spending 400 per person per month on groceries for her, her kids and her husband, so a total of 1600/mo on groceries and refused to even consider discount stores or free food resources because they weren't organic. This was 10 yrs ago. I gave up at that point.
Lianna Wilbur 2 years ago
Been there done most of these as well, slight twist is that i don't buy or ask for much since it's a want not necessarily a need. and with food or replacing of items i will just tell people my step father is a Marine i don't complain much and make do with what i got even if it doesn't work well it works enough. it's how me and my wife could survive on just her disability income until mine went through when normally people can't survive on it. survival is everything i feel to people who grew up poor. i feel guilty thinking i have too much now since i can live more rather than just survive so i still help out my friends or family or tip the driver since i know the feeling and want them to survive too
Scarlett O'Hara's Ghost 2 years ago
Never again work ethic... Sounds similar to an oath taken by a poor, beaten down, southern Belle near the end of the civil war. "I'll get through this, and when I do, I'll never go hungry again! Me, nor any of my folk! " Then conducted business in a Manner that would make most men hesitate...
#23
I have ”poverty toes”. We didn’t have a lot of money growing up so shoes were worn until they died, regardless of fit. My toes are curled and with prominent knuckles from being scrunched into too-small shoes.
Auntriarch 2 years ago
My mother was very frugal, but we always had shoes fitted, because growing up poor and in the war, she has ruined feet. Thank you mum
Widdershins66 2 years ago
Yep, we only have one pair of feet and one pair of eyes. And one set of adult teeth. We were as poor as a church mouse but no compromise on these things. Clarks feet measurement, and NHS Opticians and dental check ups, all annually.
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Whitefox 2 years ago (edited)
I guess growing up in a warmish environment saved me here. I hate shoes and used to go barefoot as much as possible. I did do a whole presentation to show my parents how spending a little more on a better shoe would save them money in the long haul and won that argument. To this day I will wear my clothes until they fall apart and will buy cheap to replace them. But I will spend decent money on my shoes. Granted I only have 3 pair at a time. Flip flops, flats and a boot.
karen snyder 2 years ago
Why the question mark, Marianne? Are you asking why some kids don't get new shoes? I told my parents my shoes fit, when they didn't, for two years, because I knew I would get the cheapest shoes at the store and my neighbor had given me her old Converse All Stars. I'm 5'11" with size 6/USA women's feet, because I didn't want to be humiliated by my peers over shoes.
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D3v1lD0ll 2 years ago
My great-grandmother, raised in the depression had foot issues like that. The problem was exacerbated by decades working on her feet in a department store. By the time I was old enough to notice the difference, her feet were practically square and her toes almost invisible. Thank goodness for house slippers, though my poor Darling still insisted on wearing pumps whenever she left the house. That tiny lady had class!
Kat Min 2 years ago
Jesus. Were there no thift shops, at the time? Where I live you can get 2nd hand clothes from charities for a few cents or even free when you go to the right places and events. Although it'S tough with children's shoes. People tend to toss them as it's conidered 'bad' for children to wear shoes worn down by someone else.
moon_magic 2 years ago
Me too. My little toes are crushed and curled under the one next to them. Fortunately they don't hurt
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
I always wound up busting the heals out. I'd basically have duct tape shoes most of the year.
#24
Only shopping in the clearance sections even after I grew up and started making good money.
Roddfergg 2 years ago
I make decent money and I still cannot justify paying full price for most clothes. These days it's, "$20 for a T-SHIRT?!?!"
Kiss Army 2 years ago
I still check clearance sections first and I love to shop thrift shops for treasures. My one big indulgence is concert t-shirts and hoodies. They are ridiculously expensive but I love live music events and the tee/hoodies are mementos from my experiences.
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Marie Dahme 2 years ago
Or flipping thru the marked down meat first thing on Tuesdays to see if I could get discounted ground beef at 70/30 because no one could afford the 93/7. Lol
Margot Parker 2 years ago
Thrifting is cool now..... my son things stuff to resell! All growing up he was in used baby and little kid clothes. They grow so fast the clothes are practically new ! I could get 2 green garbage bags of clothes for under 25 bucks !
Teresa Spanics 2 years ago
I grew up wearing clothes (1960s) that were my female cousin's and I gave them back when she had her daughter.
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Thomas Sanders 2 years ago
I always check clearance sections and am a sucker for a $3 t shirt.
Heather Christopher 2 years ago
Clearance and thrift stores are my go to. I can buy them new, but mentally I CAN'T. It still seems wasteful. It's gotten better , I can buy new jeans, but they HAVE to be on sale.
Angie Falzarano 2 years ago
Still do because you'd be surprised what's there. Brand New boxes of cereal, specialty crackers (gf), or plastic silverware (I'm moving and everything's packed but I reuse them till they break), discounted only because the boxes as a small crush I'm the top or it's the last of an item. I needed a DVD player so i went to Walmart and found just what I needed in the clearance.
Helen Anne Mertsching 2 years ago
Hard to upvote with a background picture of Walmart, though. They’re a huge cause of the modern problem in many small towns in the United States, and their serfs abroad, particularly in Asia, are treated abysmally.
Amanda Trent 2 years ago
People STILL look down on me for stocking up on clearance meats..ain't a dang thing wrong with them!
Amanda Trent 2 years ago
All I can think of is that song "thrift shop" by Macklemore lol. $60 for a Tshirt now that's just some ignorant s**t
#25
Having duplicates of essentials. You develop a prepper mentality for every “just in case” situation.
Linda Lee 2 years ago
Always buying 2 of everything; you might not have money next time. Out of mustard? Buy 2. One to use now and one goes in the pantry.
Miz Melatonin 2 years ago
I thought that was just being smart, but now after looking in my pantry, I see it. I apparently have issues.
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Marie Dahme 2 years ago
They say people like me and some of you pandas have suffered due to our childhood poverty have moderate case of PTSD.
LordSiravant 2 years ago
They're right. Poverty causes generational psychological trauma.
Load More Replies... Brenda 2 years ago
At o e time, I had almost 40 tubes of toothpaste (when I was still getting them free), more than 25 toothbrushes, 15 bottles of hand soap, 12 body wash, and nearly 30 bottles of shampoo, conditioner, etc. Refused to get rid of them since they don't go bad. Did give a lot to kids & family. Still took 3 years before I bought more
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
This was really noticable when the 'Rona hit. Fools buying 18 packs of toilet paper.
Shelley DuVal 2 years ago
Any time something I use that is half price in the supermarket, I buy two of, and put the second one in a cupboard with all the other seconds. If the same item is still on special the next week I go shopping I will buy that again. Anything that won't go off. When the 2020 toilet paper debacle happened I did not need to go any tp at all, and only used about half of my stash which was easily refilled once the shops were able to refill the shelves again.
Isabel Care 2 years ago
Me and six strangers standing round a pallet of mixed types of tuna on special offer. I took over, delegated one type to each person and said to work out what 12 tins cost as some were in 3, 4 or six packs or solo. So much easier than trying to work it out alone. I ended up with about 6 months of tuna that day.
Deborah THE Band 2 years ago
I don't get this. Not sure buying two of everything point's to an economically deprived childhood.... as much as to a greedy, inner a*s-hole.
#26
Difficulty throwing things away.
deejak 2 years ago
For tinkerers, having plenty of materials available for that spontaneous gotta-make-this-thing-NOW drives that saving mentality.
W0lfiest W0lfAlive 2 years ago
I have so much cardboard and paperboard because of this... I tend to compulsively just... Want to make stuff. I tend to channel that into specifically making piñatas, so I can sell them. Tissue paper is so cheap.
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Marie Dahme 2 years ago
When having to downsize due to moving ….it causes extreme anxiety because I can’t stand throwing things away so I ensure it goes to Goodwill. And I’m a book hoarder. I freak out when I see a book in the trash can, so I fish it and give it love again.
LordSiravant 2 years ago
Same. I've rescued both books and paintings from the garbage heap and given them a home again. The act of throwing away a piece of art feels criminal and sacrilegious to me.
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John Chatfield 2 years ago
As a computer nerd, that goes double for me. I could still connect to a vga monitor if needed
Seth 2 years ago
Sometimes that is needed if your display drivers get borked and your motherboard only has legacy outputs.
Load More Replies... BluEyedSeoulite 2 years ago
My husband didn't grow up poor but he hates throwing things away because it's "wasting money" but also is in denial about his ADHD. He tries to keep everything in easy reach and visible so he remembers what he has. Everything just becomes cluttered. Hoarding and ADHD is a vicious mix
DennyS (denzoren) 2 years ago
I keep a lot but then one night when I can sleep I'll just go on a cleaning craze and throw away all the stuff I don't need...I'll still get anxiety when getting rid of it but I try to clear as much as I can.
Seth 2 years ago
I have a friend who goes through alternating cycles of buying tons of c**p she doesn't need (2-5 amazon packages arriving every single day for months in a row) followed by massive purges that look like she's going through a religious experience. There never seems to be a contentedness from having the "right amount of stuff" it's just extreme waves of acquisition and eradication.
Load More Replies... Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
How I've overcome this is by buying as few single use items as possible. We have WAY too many in the US as it is. Keurig coffee cups? Get 'em away from me!
Ben Gulick 2 years ago
The opposite can also be true, never keeping anything that wasn't extremely important to you because you never knew when you might have to move
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
Ex roommate does this, he'll bring home stuff from work or keep broken stuff "to fix". This is fine but give yourself a time limit. If that broken transmission is still in the living room floor 2 months from now it's time to go 😁
Deborah THE Band 2 years ago
If you don't have a large room filled with what (apparently by fools!) is being termed useless, you're okay. If the room begins to spill into the hall. . . Fix it or "f**k it!"
#27
Someone asked me if my kid was going to do dance or gymnastics. I was confused as to why. Their response was didn’t you do it as a kid. No I that cost money. I was lucky to play with a knockoff Barbie.
H G 2 years ago
All those fancy toy commercials on the neighbour's cartoon network..... We didn't even have coloring books because it would end up short....
William Dennett 2 years ago
I remember being jealous of my cousins’ name-brand cereal. Mofos eating lucky charms and froot loops while I had generic corn flakes.
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R Dennis 2 years ago
My daughter has been able to do so much - dance class, marching band, scouts... We are in a position now that she has these opportunities and will never live our childhoods.
Bri 2 years ago
Exactly the same, my 5 yr old daughter has an abundance of good food, heaps of clothes, scouts, swimming lessons, speech therapy, the doctor anytime she might need one. It makes me really happy. I feel like I spoil her because she does a lot (a lot to me) special occasion activities like the zoo, meal out, fairs etc . She has such a good life, she doesn't realise how good compared to others and I feel proud to be able to provide it
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Bill Marsano 2 years ago
Somewhere I read of a guy's apt comment: "The four ogf us had only one toy. It was called Outside."
Susan Teter 2 years ago (edited)
Was too busy as a child on parents farm. But I can honestly say I helped a first time mother cow deliver triplets. Worth more in memories than a dumb dance class!
Dorian Dangerous 2 years ago (edited)
I feel that... I did do baton for a bit when my dad got a better job, but had to quit because of the number of injuries I gave myself lol. Also they made me practice like thirty feet away from the other kids. But uh. Can't say I blamed em, no sense in me giving anyone but myself a concussion lol
Raimei Ai 2 years ago (edited)
My lil sis got to do gymnastics while even tho I wanted to take boxing to get my energy and pent up aggression out ..I was made to take scrapbooking... Since there was no cost as it was an after school club... Yet gymnastics cost over 150 a month... Boxing would have been 45 a month...
Jules Marten-Feldmann 2 years ago
I live in Switzerland, when we were organising our daughters health insurance i discovered they have a part where they will reimburse something like 80% of the cost of sport activities. I was so excited that she would be able to do these things that I couldn't
Johnny Storm 2 years ago
I created my own toy and games from whatever around... I remember playing blowing dart with straw and some random seed size fruit that we pick from random tree. Honestly, I'm scared of myself from the past because we are so random and play with our life. Random fruit or stuff just goes inside mouth and blow through straw. Goddamn.
#28
Realizing I wanted to have the house that all my kids friends came over to hang out at because that wasn't really an option for big chunks of my childhood.
Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦 2 years ago
I felt that. I still kinda want to be able to have friends at my house. ... But that's just me.
LordSiravant 2 years ago
Same. I love nothing more than having friends over because I was very isolated and lonely for most of my life.
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Kathy Loman 2 years ago
I loved having the place my kid's friends liked to hang out at. No one liked coming to my childhood home unless they wanted advice from my Mom.
Adam Forwood 2 years ago
Ok I hadn't even thought of this, but I love having people over (despite being a massive introvert) because I love having a place nice enough to invite people to.
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
I'm glad to say that that is my house. I'm the 'old' lady who will ALWAYS have cookies and soup if you ask. For real. (I sneak veggies into those cookies too. No one's ever noticed, either.) 😉
Widdershins66 2 years ago
Oh YES!!! Unlike me, my children were brought up in an open house! Their friends still thank me for all their lovely memories of our home, priceless 🤗🤗🤗
Amanda Trent 2 years ago
I was known as "mom" to ALL the neighborhood kids. I can't even tell u how many of them lived with us when they were teenagers! I know at one point, my son had 5 of his friends living with us bcuz they had nowhere to go. They're my kids. I call them son and daughter and they call me mom. Some of them have even cried to me and told me nobody has ever called them son before and nobody has ever shown them love like that😭❤️
#29
Still being marveled by an ice maker and side by side doors
Jeff Gabrisl 2 years ago
I hate side by side doors unless they both go to the refrigerator portion, and the freezer is a separate portion. The more cubic a compartment is, the more volume. Side by side freezer/fridge always feels like there isn't enough room in either.
BluEyedSeoulite 2 years ago
You are 100% correct. I have a side by side and it feels very narrow but deep. Like you have to dig for stuff and things get forgotten in the back. I want to find a top and bottom fridge/freezer when this one dies
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Lyyyy 2 years ago
I remember going to US to see relatives when I was 10 and we went to Las Vegas to see their relatives. I learned many things: 1. It is unbelievably hot in some parts of the world. 2. There are public swimming pools with salty water in. Hurt my eyes, never before experienced salty water. Why do they do that? 3. There are ice vending machines in freezers. Like what is this magic!? Ate like 4 liters of ice in a few days. 4. Air conditioning, what is that? From Finland, where last years summer was on a thursday.
Hiram's Friend 2 years ago
Salt water pools because a converter in the pump system strips the chlorine and uses it to protect the water.
Load More Replies... Auntriarch 2 years ago
My brother put two tall fridge freezers side by side with the doors hung opposite sides so both handles were in the middle. He's an animal 😂
Manicdragonpizza️ 10 months ago
We have a teeny weeny fridge with one door at my home and for some reason it fits everything
Naomie Moore 2 years ago
Mine was in the bottom freezer compartment but it died and can no longer get parts - so I went back to ice cube trays!
#30
Even when they have money to burn, they’ll still be frugal as f**k.
Helena 2 years ago
Or the opposite direction. If you've had a lifetime of want and suddenly have money, you can get a little crazy with the what you spend money on.
Adam Forwood 2 years ago
Yep this is me. I love having money to buy nice things, I've kind of become addicted to it (dare I say a little snobby in some areas). Whenever I'm at a restaurant I often order the most expensive glass of wine on the menu, partly because I'm hoping it will be the nicest ... but also partly because I can
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Paul Beebe 2 years ago (edited)
This is me. I was a single dad of 5 and on unemployment for awhile and had grown up poor. My kids, now that I make wicked good money, will scold me for always buying the cheapest of everything... I can stretch a monthly food dollar until it's paperthin...
R Dennis 2 years ago
I am frugal af... that isn't to say cheap. I grew up with hand me down clothes and having two pants in high school. I now have money, but I buy everything at a discount - gourmet food, airfare, clothes... I find the best deal, then wait until I find a better one. If there is no really good deal, I don't need it.
Vix Spiderthrust 2 years ago (edited)
Lots of entertainers from the prewar generation were like this. Tripping over their money, but tight as a duck's a*se. They'd been kids before the welfare state was instituted, and they knew grinding poverty.
Gary Geracci 1 year ago
This is a plague for some folks for sure, I for one can understand it.
Gary Geracci 2 years ago
Saved so much in early years, wifey says,You can have that Business now, Reply- Really??????
Rusty DeShackleford 2 years ago
Know what else is a sign? Plagiarizing an entire story from Reddit. You hack.
Deborah THE Band 2 years ago (edited)
Maybe they merely pay attention. Or, maybe they're over 65 and know that Social Security is bull-s**t and nothing as hilarious and still so f*****g sad as Mddicare has ever been offered up before in seriousness!!! My father had the supplemental health insurance from the same company I use. He paid $140.00 for pace-maker surgery --- in this century! I was billed $2000 for two nights in a hospital room... in which I was visited by the lunch lady. Period. That's it. No. No, no, no. Not playing. Start without me!
#31
Spending any windfall money. The bone deep certainty that money will just...go away. There will always be another surprise bill or the car will break down. If you get some extra money, you buy the kids a trampoline because for once you don't have to say "no, we can't afford that".
Another Amy 2 years ago
Or finally being able to save up some money but then being too afraid to ever use it on absolutely anything
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
Invest it in a money market account. I'm dead serious.
Load More Replies... Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
And people will still judge you for it. There's this idea that all we come down to is money. I collect fashion dolls (this is related and going somewhere, hang in there). My mentor was a family friend named Dot. When Dot died she willed me her dolls, including a #2 and a #3 Barbie. Over the last 30 years people have asked me, almost accusatorialy, why I don't sell them if they're worth so much and I'm so poor? Because they're worth more to me than their dollar amount. I reject the idea that I SHOULD sell my things to the wealthier as if they deserve those things and I don't somehow. Dottie knew exactly who would cherish her dolls when she was gone, and she was correct.
David 2 years ago
Sadly, this also helps to keep you poor. I have (relative) who gets a tax return or whatever - has great plans for the money. Within a week or so it is all gone and they are sad faced about how they wasted / can't account for it all. For some people, "poor" is at least in part generated by their own actions due to not being fiscally responsible with what they do have.
#32
Lots of Cool Whip & Country Crock containers
Jeff Gabrisl 2 years ago
We re-use the containers that the lunch meat meat comes in until it wears out, or the lid gets lost. I would love to buy the stuff they slice fresh at the deli, but it is to expensive.
Load More Replies... Lauri Ceriani 2 years ago
Right? Buying products dependent upon, is it in a reusable container?
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
I had to limit these in my house. I absolutely hate them. (It's a long story). So after the holidays I throw out last year's and we can keep this year's.
#33
I wasn't in the know with all the cool Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon shows.
But I did watch Arthur, Cyberchase, Clifford and Dragon Tales.
Jennifer Sheppard 2 years ago
Yeah, I often had no choice but to watch Babar, Tin Tin, Arthur, etc. The one good thing was that even without cable (which we didn't have until I was a teenager in the early 2000s), one of our two English channels did air The Simpsons 🙏🏻
#34
Hesitant to go to the doctor when medical care is needed because of copays - even if they can afford it.
Widdershins66 2 years ago
We were Poor (UK) but thank goodness we had the NHS. No bill, no debt.
Cassi Lyris 2 years ago
It's $80 for me just to walk in the door. $120 if they need to run any tests. $2,000 if I'm dumb enough to go to the ER and they determine it wasn't "life threatening" and that's before they bill you the rest. It's $200 at the door before even let you leave. They hand you loan paperwork on your way out. I am not joking.
Load More Replies... Lauri Ceriani 2 years ago
Are you bleeding profusely or running a high (101+) fever? Then no medical besides what Mom can manage to pull off.
Metalhead Turtle 🇺🇦 2 years ago
Yep. I don't have copays, but I get hesitant because gas is expensive.
Lynn Morello 2 years ago
The local doctors have recently brought ion Co-pay for their services. So now I wait until I desperatly need to see a doctor before I make an appointment
Michelle C 2 years ago
Yup. Even now, I’m very careful about my health just so I don’t have to go to the doctor if I don’t need to do that.
#35
Little or no financial literacy.
If you grew up poor chances are you had no one around to teach you about how to manage things like mortgages, large amounts of savings, or how to budget past the point of juggling bills.
It sucks because knowing how to do these things is such a useful skill, and can get you out of a lot of difficult situations if you play your cards right.
Knowing how to manage money also prevents you from being taken advantage of by people and companies that don’t have your best interest at heart.
While I’m here, if you identify with this comment, please check out r/PovertyFinance and r/PovertyFinanceCanada. They’re super helpful.
Michelle C 2 years ago
I’ve noticed this happens to children in abusive situations, too. My mom and her family were wonderful. Dad and his family, not so much. I feel like I missed out on a lot of what I should have learned as a kid because Mom worked hard and didn’t have as much time as she would’ve liked to teach us the things my sibling and I needed to know. She taught us a lot, regardless, and I will always be grateful for that..
#36
One day my girlfriend asked me why I'm washing ziploc bags. I told her so we can reuse them later. It was only after the following discussion and some thinking that I realized it's not very normal.
Frando Bone 2 years ago
you should be doing that anyway to keep plastic out of the environment.
Jeff Gabrisl 2 years ago
Unless you keep raw meat in the bag. Or anything that got moldy. Those bags get tossed because you can't guarantee that they will be food safe in the future.
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Sarah Moeding 2 years ago
It's totally normal and exactly what should be done. We waste far too much plastic, it's not about wealth, it's about causing harm.
featherytoad 2 years ago
I do it all the time. I can afford them but wash them anyways because it just seems like such a waste not to. Especially if there was only something like a half of lemon or hunk of cheese that's super easy to wash out.
Spittnimage 2 years ago
My BIL had me do this for him. He was disabled and had hardly any money for anything.
Mary Kelly 2 years ago (edited)
i know tons of not poor people who do it...there are even racks for drying them....just tell people that you are eco-friendly if they ask ;)
Tushar Roy Mukherjee 2 years ago
Reusing them will reduce our plastic output. Plus, aren't they super-damn useful? And where I live, they're not even sold in any shop. The restaurant chains, etc. have special contracts with certain companies to make them. So obv, our family hoards them.
Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
I recently switched from sandwich bags to a little plastic box that holds my sammy, snacks and fruit 🙂
#37
Aversion to certain foods they had to eat ---- I won't touch cheerios
R Dennis 2 years ago
Pea soup, tuna casserole, oxtail stew (oxtail used to be almost free)... I absolutely hated them! Now, I have them for nostalgia.
Load More Replies... Kate Jones 2 years ago
Canned veggies. Ugh just thinking about eating another canned green bean makes me nauseas.
DubMaccaT 2 years ago
Scouse for me, large pot at the start of the week, as it thickened we’d have it over chips later in the week, so sick of it by the end of the week I was adding HP sauce packets for flavour.
Widdershins66 2 years ago (edited)
🤗 Fellow Scouser! We often had blind scouse.
Load More Replies... Mary Kelly 2 years ago
opposite for my mom and dad...it is nostalgic for them...dad grew up in depression and family got maybe one glass of milk a week...had cereal with coffee as a kid (which was cheap in the u.s. i the 30s, probably attributed to some slave-labor in south america)...still did this as an adult...mom would also eat fried mush with karo syrup as a treat b/c it was a treat to her as a child...
Lauri Ceriani 2 years ago
Beans, especially when bacon is used instead of a ham hock for the meat. We'd eat beans once a week and the smell of them cooking all day made me sick. I still hate them to this day.
Jason 2 years ago
Man I hated those as a kid. We'd get the giant knock off not frosted ones that were the size of what felt like an apple. No milk to go with it. Was like eating straw mixed with sawdust
Load More Replies... Lynn Morello 2 years ago
Mom cooked Tripe for dad. It always sent me fleeing out of the house for several hours at a time.
Diana Robison 2 years ago
Yep... For me it's Goulash because a box of pasta a jar of sauce and a pound of beef fed 8 people 2 dinners with bread and butter if you were still hungry (which was actually margarine bc we couldn't afford real butter)
Samara Messer 2 years ago
I won't touch Cneerios either or Tuna Helper. It was a combination of being poor and my mom hating to cook and meal prep. It was pretty much all we ate. Just the smel turns my stomach.
What do you think ?
Andy Frobig 2 years ago
Mom worked for New York Telephone in the '70s, but we lived in a town with an independent phone company, which meant she would have had to pay for phone service, so instead we had a cheap Radio Shack intercom and if somebody wanted to talk to us, they'd call the neighbors and the neighbors would call us on the intercom. We also didn't have a color TV till about 1978, but even that was an improvement from around 1970 when we had a little TV with picture but no sound sitting on top of a big TV with sound but no picture and we had to turn both on to watch and listen to a show
D. Pitbull 2 years ago
Wow. LOL... I look at most of these and think "Uhh.. I thought that was just growing up Asian". Seriously - my whole group of friends/acquaintances growing up (all a bunch of East Asian kids, most of them Chinese) we did SO much of this stuff just as part of daily life (Don't waste food, make sure your guests have MORE than enough to eat, if it ain't broke you don't need a new one, etc) - and I wouldn't really call any of us as having grown up 'poor'... and some of them were downright stupid wealthy.
JoyfulZebra 2 years ago
I wonder if that had anything to do with how prevalent Confucian thinking is in China and East Asia in general. It developed during the chaotic Warring States Period in China, and so is focused on order and tradition to maintain harmony (kinda like an inherent "never again" mindset).
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NamiKoa 2 years ago
My mother has always scraped out eggs with her finger when she cracks them open. She said years ago an acquaintance saw her do that and asked her if she grew up poor.
Mimi M 2 years ago (edited)
An older woman told me once that prospective MIL's would watch their potential DIL's to see if they did that because it was a sign that they would be a good homemaker - scraping out that bit of egg. I do it, b/c not doing it is wasteful.
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Matthews 2 years ago
One thing I haven’t seen in the list is the near pathological fear of being robbed / burgled because there’s just no possible way of replacing anything.
BluEyedSeoulite 2 years ago
We were never worried about being robbed because we had nothing anyone would want. Until a neighbor girl's druggie bf found out my mom had cancer therefore probably had pain pills. Besides the meds though, nothing worth a damn to resell
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censorshipsucks 2 years ago
Couldn't read this, too many familiar things. Only thing I don't do on this list is control spending. Once I got a decent salary I was like WOOOOOHOOOOOOO. But still hoard condiments from takeout and still re-use their containers as tupperware and still only chuck clothes once they get lots of holes (one hole is easy to fix).
Angie Falzarano 2 years ago
It's hard to give up favorite shirts even with holes in them and a quite few. I got a Tshirt on my 30th birthday that said 30th on it. I was in my 40s before giving it up
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Mary ey? 2 years ago
I disagree that things are "much much better today". Inflation is up by 189% from 40 years ago.648 million people are living in EXTREME poverty (less than $2.15 in today's money) ( Please remember down vote spam not what you disagree with. People get kicked off bored panda for to many down votes)
Victoria 2 years ago
Worldwide extreme poverty has considerably been reduced in the last 30 years. Mostly because of China and India, but still.
Load More Replies... Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
Couple things: we weren't poor growing up but my folks did know the value of hand me downs. I usually inherited my older sisters clothes when she outgrew them. Then I went to live with an aunt who got rid of everything every year and bought new. Heaven forbid you wear something a little too big. It had to fit, never mind if you only get to wear it once because you had a growth spurt. I didn't understand for a long while; my only explanation is that my older cousin hid the fact she was pregnant under clothes that were too big. My other comment is about presents. We did the standard Christmas/birthday stuff. Otherwise if you wanted it you saved up your allowance. As an adult I still save up for things; I get uncomfortable when people buy me things, especially if it's expensive. I've learned not to mention certain things that are cool around friends because one of them will get a wild hair and buy it.
Angie Falzarano 2 years ago
We weren't poor poor but we did Christmas on small scales. Decorations made by hand. But saving for something special I still do. To make extra money at home we'd get a penny a piece to pull stickers out of the carpet. Lived in the country lots of stickers and shag carpet I still pick up pennies. Despite people they're not worth anything. My answer 5 pennies make a nickel a hundred pennies make a dollar. I always have a change jar to put change in for anything I might need but don't have the money, count my change.
Load More Replies...
Kalleanon 2 years ago
Seriously America - healthcare *should* be a basic human right in any civilised country. Not going to the doctor or dentist because you can't afford it in the richest country in the world is seriously, seriously wrong.
LordSiravant 2 years ago
Agreed 100%. But a lot of boomers sneer at that because of the bootstraps mentality. Even as they collect their paychecks from the very same social programs they hate so much.
Load More Replies... Ray Arani 2 years ago (edited)
Not seeking medical care until death is an actual strong possibility. Checking bank balance before every single purchase all the time. Knee jerk reaction to possible stolen wallet, "what they gone do? Fix my credit? Get my account outta overdraft? Good luck being me my dude, but it doesn't pay." Still having anxiety and staring at register at check out until it says "approved" even after checking bank balance, and always knowing what card to try next if that first one doesn't work...even when you know you got money now. Always have a few side hustles and a back up plan. And finally, my personal fave, the go bag. For years everything I owned fit in my backpack. I carried a backpack with my essentials all through my twenties, even after I was financially secure. Even to work, the grocery store, on a date. Slept with it literally in my bed. I just never broke the habit or thought about why. Still keep all essentials for starting over in my car.
Andy Frobig 2 years ago
Mom worked for New York Telephone in the '70s, but we lived in a town with an independent phone company, which meant she would have had to pay for phone service, so instead we had a cheap Radio Shack intercom and if somebody wanted to talk to us, they'd call the neighbors and the neighbors would call us on the intercom. We also didn't have a color TV till about 1978, but even that was an improvement from around 1970 when we had a little TV with picture but no sound sitting on top of a big TV with sound but no picture and we had to turn both on to watch and listen to a show
D. Pitbull 2 years ago
Wow. LOL... I look at most of these and think "Uhh.. I thought that was just growing up Asian". Seriously - my whole group of friends/acquaintances growing up (all a bunch of East Asian kids, most of them Chinese) we did SO much of this stuff just as part of daily life (Don't waste food, make sure your guests have MORE than enough to eat, if it ain't broke you don't need a new one, etc) - and I wouldn't really call any of us as having grown up 'poor'... and some of them were downright stupid wealthy.
JoyfulZebra 2 years ago
I wonder if that had anything to do with how prevalent Confucian thinking is in China and East Asia in general. It developed during the chaotic Warring States Period in China, and so is focused on order and tradition to maintain harmony (kinda like an inherent "never again" mindset).
Load More Replies... NamiKoa 2 years ago
My mother has always scraped out eggs with her finger when she cracks them open. She said years ago an acquaintance saw her do that and asked her if she grew up poor.
Mimi M 2 years ago (edited)
An older woman told me once that prospective MIL's would watch their potential DIL's to see if they did that because it was a sign that they would be a good homemaker - scraping out that bit of egg. I do it, b/c not doing it is wasteful.
Load More Replies... Matthews 2 years ago
One thing I haven’t seen in the list is the near pathological fear of being robbed / burgled because there’s just no possible way of replacing anything.
BluEyedSeoulite 2 years ago
We were never worried about being robbed because we had nothing anyone would want. Until a neighbor girl's druggie bf found out my mom had cancer therefore probably had pain pills. Besides the meds though, nothing worth a damn to resell
Load More Replies... censorshipsucks 2 years ago
Couldn't read this, too many familiar things. Only thing I don't do on this list is control spending. Once I got a decent salary I was like WOOOOOHOOOOOOO. But still hoard condiments from takeout and still re-use their containers as tupperware and still only chuck clothes once they get lots of holes (one hole is easy to fix).
Angie Falzarano 2 years ago
It's hard to give up favorite shirts even with holes in them and a quite few. I got a Tshirt on my 30th birthday that said 30th on it. I was in my 40s before giving it up
Load More Replies... Mary ey? 2 years ago
I disagree that things are "much much better today". Inflation is up by 189% from 40 years ago.648 million people are living in EXTREME poverty (less than $2.15 in today's money) ( Please remember down vote spam not what you disagree with. People get kicked off bored panda for to many down votes)
Victoria 2 years ago
Worldwide extreme poverty has considerably been reduced in the last 30 years. Mostly because of China and India, but still.
Load More Replies... Kraneia The Dancing Dryad 2 years ago
Couple things: we weren't poor growing up but my folks did know the value of hand me downs. I usually inherited my older sisters clothes when she outgrew them. Then I went to live with an aunt who got rid of everything every year and bought new. Heaven forbid you wear something a little too big. It had to fit, never mind if you only get to wear it once because you had a growth spurt. I didn't understand for a long while; my only explanation is that my older cousin hid the fact she was pregnant under clothes that were too big. My other comment is about presents. We did the standard Christmas/birthday stuff. Otherwise if you wanted it you saved up your allowance. As an adult I still save up for things; I get uncomfortable when people buy me things, especially if it's expensive. I've learned not to mention certain things that are cool around friends because one of them will get a wild hair and buy it.
Angie Falzarano 2 years ago
We weren't poor poor but we did Christmas on small scales. Decorations made by hand. But saving for something special I still do. To make extra money at home we'd get a penny a piece to pull stickers out of the carpet. Lived in the country lots of stickers and shag carpet I still pick up pennies. Despite people they're not worth anything. My answer 5 pennies make a nickel a hundred pennies make a dollar. I always have a change jar to put change in for anything I might need but don't have the money, count my change.
Load More Replies... Kalleanon 2 years ago
Seriously America - healthcare *should* be a basic human right in any civilised country. Not going to the doctor or dentist because you can't afford it in the richest country in the world is seriously, seriously wrong.
LordSiravant 2 years ago
Agreed 100%. But a lot of boomers sneer at that because of the bootstraps mentality. Even as they collect their paychecks from the very same social programs they hate so much.
Load More Replies... Ray Arani 2 years ago (edited)
Not seeking medical care until death is an actual strong possibility. Checking bank balance before every single purchase all the time. Knee jerk reaction to possible stolen wallet, "what they gone do? Fix my credit? Get my account outta overdraft? Good luck being me my dude, but it doesn't pay." Still having anxiety and staring at register at check out until it says "approved" even after checking bank balance, and always knowing what card to try next if that first one doesn't work...even when you know you got money now. Always have a few side hustles and a back up plan. And finally, my personal fave, the go bag. For years everything I owned fit in my backpack. I carried a backpack with my essentials all through my twenties, even after I was financially secure. Even to work, the grocery store, on a date. Slept with it literally in my bed. I just never broke the habit or thought about why. Still keep all essentials for starting over in my car.
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