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Insults – we've all heard them and maybe even dished them out ourselves. They're like a verbal battlefield where words become weapons. But here's the thing: some insults are more than just a slap on the ego; they're pure poetry in put-down form.

Enter the “Rare Insults” X account. With more than 1.5 million followers, it's the go-to spot for the wittiest and most jaw-dropping linguistic maestros on the internet.

We've rounded up the crème de la crème of these verbal fireworks for your amusement. So, continue scrolling and let us know which ones tickled your funny bone. And hey, if you're still hungry for more, we've got you covered. Check out Bored Panda's earlier dose of insult madness – because who doesn't love a good laugh?

#1

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    When it comes to humor, clever insults can often walk a fine line between being perceived as playful banter and crossing into the territory of cruelty. People often use witty and sharp-tongued remarks in comedy, but can we do it without being unkind? To learn more about witty and clever insults, Bored Panda reached out to Nigel Barber, Ph.D., an evolutionary psychologist and the writer of “Kindness In A Cruel World.”

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    Some friends often playfully tease each other with insults that don't come across as mean-spirited. According to Nigel Barber, in that context, an insult is accepted as a witty remark. “It can be quite different if we are interacting with a stranger whose insults may be perceived as unfriendly and even malicious. You need to know what is acceptable speech for a particular setting, context, and group of acquaintances.”

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    #5

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    Mini grizzly
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Alarm clock part made me laugh out loud. 🤣🤣

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    When we chat online, it's easy for jokes and playful words to accidentally hurt someone's feelings. How can we then have fun with clever remarks and wordplay while still being nice to each other? “In the real world, it is easy to see when we have crossed the line because the other person's hurt expression becomes clear and we have a chance to backtrack, or qualify, our remarks, or to soften them with a lighter joke.  In the context of online interactions, it is much riskier at least if we are relying mainly on text,” Barber explained. When we write something online, it's permanent, and there's always someone ready to criticize us or even cancel us.

    #7

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    Daria
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nah, glasses are great, and sunglasses are literally the symbol of "cool" 😎

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    #8

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    In today's digital world, insults often come in the form of written words, like messages or comments. But here's the thing: when we can't see someone's face or hear their tone, it can change how we understand and feel about those insults. “Communications experts believe that most of our communications are nonverbal so that a medium that cuts off the nonverbal puts us at a real disadvantage,” Barber shared. “We cannot disparage our own statements with a shrug, or a laugh. The bottom line is that we should really be much more cautious in online communications. Unfortunately, that does not seem to be how most people communicate online, which may be one reason why there is so much friction and unpleasantness,” the professor added.

    #10

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    SheamusFanFrom1987
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How... do you even get into that many car accidents, let alone in a single year? "-_-

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    #12

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    It’s important to mention that, in today's digital age, the impact of insults, especially when they find their way online and go viral, can be devastating for some people. Nigel Barber shared that crushing insults can dent one’s confidence and impinge on their happiness. “Clinical psychologists report that there is a huge increase in anxiety and depression, particularly among young people, during the Internet Age. Teenagers seem to be most affected due to (a) the fact that they are extensive users of social media and (b) that they do not have the maturity to cope with online insults.”

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    The best way of coping with insults, according to Barber, is probably to take a break from the platforms that are causing distress for some time. “This helps to establish a little distance from them and to regain a better sense of control over one's own life. This might involve spending time in the actual company of friends, doing something that provides a sense of creativity or mastery, or simply spending time exploring the wonders of nature.”

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    Cara G
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And they are all thinking, "JFC put that hair UP before you get scalped, lady!"

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    #14

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    Deborah B
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My cat make this annoyed "huff" sigh when I won't do what he wants.

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    #15

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Staying off the meat! Yaaasss 😂

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    We asked Barber if social norms around insults and offensive language have shifted in recent years. He shared that some people like to say that the world is becoming ruder, but there have always been plenty of unkind comments. “Look at William Shakespeare who liked to have his characters engage in duels of insults. What has really changed is that social media are run by algorithms that maximize engagement. Since hatred increases engagement, this means that nastiness comes to the fore. Communications that express real hostility are promoted in a business model that monetizes hatred.   Hence the rise of nasty insults online and of the people who put them out there.”

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    Christopher Bowers
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Im 36, she would probably say I am useless with 3 years experience.

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    #17

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    Zephyr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    O.P. certainly should use a condom so as not to spread such stupidity

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    DC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ... and that careless douche even killed all the other animals as well. I can understand that humans, in total, do suck big time, but do cats, do crows, do spiders? None of them! They're all precious living beings, and yet, the god humans invented only cares about hum - nevermind, my mistake, got it. Whatever it is, if you can't degod it, leave it behind, and if you can, do.

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    #20

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    CP
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Big Bang Theory needs that treatment too.

    Zephyr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Were you not loved as a child, why do you have so much hate in your life

    Cara G
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    FRIENDS didn't utilize a laugh track. It was filmed before a studio audience.

    Exotic Butters
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Most sit coms are filmed before a live audience with a laugh track added before it airs.

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    Carlo Gennaro
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Millions of people in the United States and around the world would disagree

    WindySwede
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But the other billions might agree? /s

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    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is more a comment on the average person's level of humor sophistication than a critique of Friends. I would have to agree with him.

    Nice Beast Ludo
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Actually Friends doesn't use a laugh track. They would constantly change their jokes if the audience didn't laugh

    Manny
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or the fact this person has no sense of humor

    CrunChewy McSandybutt
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sitcoms were so much better when they were filmed in front of a live audience.

    mSpencer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We lost living single to friends 😭

    Anony Mouse
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I accidentally hit my phone with my thumb while watching Hulu and somehow started Home Improvement. Now it will haunt my history forever. WANT TO CONTINUE WATCHING HOME IMPROVEMENT? If you like Home Improvement, you'll love -

    David A Paterson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When you have the laugh track out, can I borrow it to add it to the movie "Water (wonderful) world"? So everyone can laugh at the two hundred obvious blunders throughout it.

    Beachbum
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never understood the appeal of this show, it just wasn't funny!

    Rinoboyrich
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It’s not that it wasn’t funny, it’s just t… you’re right. It wasn’t funny.

    Gina Babe
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was just saying this Friday! I don't find it funny

    Marja Berisa
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Go one step further: add the Friends laugh trap to something like Hannibal and hey, guaranteed weird fun!

    MagicJacket
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Alert! Alert! Someone is announcing they are an edgelord. Marvel at him, people, for you shall never be as edgy as he.

    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not liking Friends in s actually quite common place. Nothing to see here.

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    Birgit Sommer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In this case of useless wishes...can we reboot Madonna please?

    Leesa DeAndrea
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wish they would do that with all sitcoms. And shut off the applause signs at talk shows.

    Biggie Ed
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fox News should have a laugh track!

    Definitely a Human
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's already clips of this on YouTube. Really highlights how banal this show is.

    Manatee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What a great life he leads..

    Cat Crazy Lady
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Currently have Arrested Development on. This made me imagine the show with a laugh track. Not good.

    T'Mar of Vulcan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Friends without the laugh track turns into "thirtysomething". The Big Bang Theory without the laugh track turns into "bunch of arseholes sitting around insulting each other".

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And when you learn that the laughter is an old recording where everyone recorded laughing is long dead...

    Floeckchen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    M*A*S*H german synchro didn't have any laugh track and it was miles better

    DrBronxx
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Editing out the laugh tracks would be a pretty easy job - it was filmed in front of a live audience. what you would do by editing them out is ruin the timing of the whole thing, so what you would be doing is not showing people how unfunny it is; you'd be *making* it unfunny.

    Kristen Bagan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But is Friends "bad" because it is a bad show, or because it didn't age well? As I remember, Seinfeld was probably the most cutting edge show at the time and Friends was quite popular. Now it doesn't compare to amazing shows like Parks and Rec, The Office or The Good Place (to name only a few NBC shows) but that level of sophistication in comedy series was only just evolving.

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You youngsters don't know how good you have it. When I was young it seemed like every show was using laugh tracks and it was painful. Some didn't even bother fading out. The laughter just stopped instantly when they let go of the button.

    Marnie
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate laugh tracks, but has there ever been a TV comedy series that makes people laugh out loud? Most are not laugh-out-loud shows. I'm not sure how that is even possible with that type of comedy show. Edit: And I just read that most of it was real laughter, not a laugh track.

    Rocket Surgeon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you did this to 2 1/2 Men it'd just be a show were everybody's mean to each other and pauses for 5 seconds after every sentence.

    Aishling
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All laugh tracks where filmed in the 40s and they just got re used. So technically your listing to dead people laughing. I do have to argue with you about friends tho I love that show

    Kiwis Mom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow. So much hate. Definitely needs some F•R•I•E•N•D•S

    WhiteClawOfDeath
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    FRIENDS is a bad show. Was quite dosappointed when I watched it for the 1st time about 7 years ago

    Frank Russell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Most things that are really popular are that way because most people have poor taste.

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    DC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "... you can leave your head on!"

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    les
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    pedro pascal looks like an ill richard hammond

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    Colin Matthews
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wonder which of the Zuckerberg 4000 clones this is?

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    #29

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    Zephyr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Physics.....and common sense pertaining to geography

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    Zephyr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Here's some ointment for the burn reapply every 2 minutes

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Holding the baby upside down by the feet!

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    #33

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    Hiro Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who had to read that more than once.

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it's in the shower it's fair game!

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    #36

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He ain't wrong to certain extent. But gotta find new adventures!

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    #37

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Expected result from eating Taco Bell

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    #40

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    Zephyr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    a better reply : It's good to have friends that won't lie to you

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    #41

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Must be extra ripe bc those skins are tough. AF!

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    #43

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Woman is wasting her time - people gonna say what people gonna say

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    #44

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    David A Paterson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm going to have to re-evaluate my IQ. It took me 20 seconds to see that.

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    #45

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    Zephyr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mine has a price yours brings the lice

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    #46

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    DC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    HAHAHAHAHA - WITH STRINGS, HAHAHA, GUITARHAHA, WITH STRINGS HAHA...

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    #47

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    DC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I don't like to smile unless there's a reason to" - Daria

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    #48

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How long they date depends on whether that's a reasonable answer

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    #49

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    Hawkmoon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did a fast research on google and a C-Major on piano is three white keys, for those who wonder.

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    #50

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I bet she tells this to all her dudes 😂

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    #52

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    DC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ... Brother Teresa ... oh my ... oh my, I hope that now that I'm dying from laughing I won't be placed in Mother Teresa's custody. Evl Bidge, one of the worst humans to ever have lived. Pain medication would "distant people from Jesus!", therefore they weren't administered in her facilities. But when she herself suffered and died, she was given loads and loads of everything Flora and Pharma have to offer, and did not refuse it. Maybe she knew that she was closest to Jesus anyway, and didn't need that? Anyway, let's stop remembering her as somewhat good, but as the evil, self righteous crooked parasite she was.

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    #53

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    René Sauer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Which of them is khalid? And who even is that?

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    #54

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    Mike D
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Used to be a Carpe Diem shirt from Thinking Man in the 1980's and the tag said "Tumble dry. In a dryer." I still envision someone rolling down a hill in a damp polo shirt

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    #55

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did Gatorade just call a customer a f***ing p***y? 😅

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    #56

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    #57

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    Zephyr343
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Take a drink each time he says "quirks and features"

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    #58

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    Michelle C
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Chicks do this too...I call it the calm before the storm

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    #60

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    CaptainDinosaur
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You didn't know Sheldon was about to take ya'll to church.

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    #62

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    Zephyr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He was drop kicked into the friend zone

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    #63

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That mustache, chain & hat! Totally could be GTA character

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    #64

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    #65

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    Zephyr
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your autopsy will be complete before you reload that gun

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    #66

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    Geoffrey Scott
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Trust me when I say he will get more active. One word....TEENAGER!

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    #68

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    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    best get to churning butter afore brother zebediaha breaks out the ole witch finding boulders.

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    #71

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    #72

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    Power puff scientist
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i remember this one, part of the joke is missing, where it said something like theres a chance this asteroid might hit Earth on February 14th.

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    #73

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    hitex
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You mess with the bull, you get the s**t

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