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You can choose friends, lovers, partners in crime, friends and best friends, enemies too, but you cannot choose a family. The one you have is the one you are with forever. That includes a fair share of best moments, childhood nostalgia, reunions, and not-so-happy memories of dinner table arguments, clashing beliefs, and you know how it goes...
But since we are so sure we know our family members so well, we can easily miss the fact that it’s possible we know very little about them. How come, you ask? Well, this illuminating thread from Ask Reddit has some answers.
“What 'family secret' did you learn that totally shocked you?” one Redditor asked, and the result is thousands of spilled family secrets that were not meant to reach the daylight. Below we wrapped up some of the most shocking ones people shared.
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#1
I was adopted by the man I always knew as 'Dad'. I was always asked "did you think of him differently after you found out?" My response has and always will be yes. I respect him a hell of a lot more than I ever did before.
Yvonne Dauwalder Balsiger 3 years ago (edited)
This is really wholesome, especially when compared to other secrets here (edit: grammar)
just me 3 years ago
I found out when I was 16. By finding old paperwork. It was hard to reconcile "they're my family" and "they've been lying to me my whole life." Mostly good with it now. Tell your kids, tell them early, tell them often, don't hide it like it's something wrong or shameful. I didn't care about the adoption, but the sense of betrayal messed me up for a while.
Falicity Humdinger 3 years ago
I got to the age of 13 when my intoxicated mother told me that the man that raised me was not my real father, he was and always will be my dad.
Brenda 3 years ago
My "dad" came into my life November 7, 1977. I had just turned 12. From day one he claimed me as his own. My sperm donor lived in the same town and never bothered to visit or ever pay support. Just before turning 15, I asked to call him dad & he agreed. Mom said he got very emotional about it. Having someone love & care when they definitely didn't have to? Yeah, it's more special than I can explain. He's my dad, just my dad and that makes me the luckiest person ever
MimSorensson 3 years ago
Heck yeah! Dad is dad, no matter the biological circumstances, but the man shouldered parenthood of someone else’s child and did it so well that the child was unaware. It’s the work of a silent hero.
RELATED:
#2
Ages ago I arranged a meeting with the local dope dealer through a real half a*s friend and surprise surprise it was my dad. Needless to say major questions were asked on both sides.
My god the look on our faces must've been priceless!
Monday 3 years ago
What would be worse: Finding out your dad is a stripper or finding out your kid is a stripper?
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Christof Irran 3 years ago
Hmmm. I read "needleless" instead of "needless" - Made a Freudian slip inside my own mind.
#3
My mom married my stepfather in the mid 80s. My mom and dad had been divorced since my birth in the early 70s. So, living primarily with my mom, she would of course go out on dates, and eventually I would get the old boyfriend introduction which usually went well. With my soon to be step father, I always knew there was something a little off. Couldn't ever really pin down what it was, but he was just off, if ever so slightly. But hey, my mom really liked this guy, so I was in. Made my way through some awkward teenage years with him, and off to college. Still, I felt like I was missing something with him.
Then, in 1997, and my mom and step dad divorce. Towards then end, he would grow very impatient and I guess they would fight a lot, but I wasn't around to see it as I had long since moved out and had my own life to lead in a different state. Didn't ever hear him come up much in conversation after that.
Now, fast forward to 2007. My mom, unfortunately had cancer and it was nearing the end of her life. I spent the last two weeks with her at her house, just talking and letting her know how much I loved her and what a great mom she had been. For those that have never seen a loved one pass away from cancer, it's not very pleasant. They tend to get a little loopy, forgetful and generally speaking, aren't 109% with it. So, sitting on the couch next to her on one of these days, she exclaims "Well, I suppose I can tell you about your stepfather now". My eyes perked right up, I knew it I knew it, something was off about him! Maybe he went AWOL from the Army? Maybe he had a kid I didn't know about? She continued on "Your stepfather was a gay porn star in the 70s". This, I had not expected.
Hugh Wellford 3 years ago
A huge chunk of gay male porn actors are straight. It's all about the money.
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Mrs C 3 years ago
I wonder if the person in the stock picture ever imagined he would be used to illustrate such an anecdote...
While some secrets are better left with the people who carry them, others surely benefit from getting out into broad daylight. But generally speaking, keeping a secret of any kind is an art form of its own. First, it’s a commitment for another person, and then, it’s a responsibility that you carry along for… well, forever.
So to find out more about what it takes to keep secrets and the power of controlling what you share with others, we spoke with Dr. Audrey Tang, an award-winning author and leadership coach.
“A secret is one of the most powerful shows of trust because it can endow another with their greatest weapon against you,” she said and added that “Sadly, sometimes, we ourselves are not always discerning with who we tell; sometimes, we might not have realized that friendship was going to take that turn…” Tang explained that this is less about the ability to keep secrets and more about the person whose secrets you hold.
#4
Found out when I was 22 but apparently I had an older sister.
She died very young due to a heart defect or something before I was born but yeah no one in my (very very large) family ever let it slip the whole time.
I only found out because my other 2 older sisters found a letter buried in a closet one day years ago and they told me about it way after the fact.
Never asked my parents about it, I can only imagine what kind of old wound that would dig up and they don't need that - I just quietly visited the grave by myself once to leave a flower. It was a pretty unreal feeling.
Lisa Valen 3 years ago
The feeling must have been unreal. I imagine tt's alot to wrap your mind around.
Powerful Katrinka 3 years ago
It is. When I was 10 I found out that I had a brother who drowned as an infant. I was rummaging in a drawer and found a tiny mitten with his name on it. I took it to my mom. A horrible situation for everyone concerned.
Load More Replies... Zero 3 years ago
Hell, my older sister died before I was born & I grew up knowing about her. She was a part of the family, photos with other older sibling, etc. and talked as such. I knew as much about her as was possible and it was an open topic. Yes it was hard on everyone but talking about her helped everyone heal (as much as they could).
Huddo's sister 3 years ago
I have a cousin who died from cystic fibrosis when she was about 9. She had two siblings, but the youngest wasn't born until after she died. The family made sure to include him in conversations about her, because they were still family regardless of whether he knew her in person. As you say, if you never talk about a lost family member it makes it much harder to heal and I imagine you would be on tenterhooks anticipating it coming up when you are trying to avoid it.
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BonnyDK 3 years ago
When my grandmother passed I was with an Aunt and my mother as we sorted her things as my grandfather was too distraught to do so. In a drawer I found a certificate that listed she had four children. One had passed at birth. There were three years between my dad-the eldest and his next younger brother pre birth control days. The baby was born between the two. I remember the paper vividly even though I was only 8 at the time. As an adult I asked my Grandfather about it an tears swelled up in his eyes. I let the matter drop. The baby has to be in a family graveyard in a small town where they lived then. No one in the family otherwise knew anything about it.
Cat 3 years ago
I'm the only girl out of 3 kids. Mom lost a baby girl a year or so before I was born. They never hid it from me but I try not to bring it up. I can only imagine the pain it can bring back.
Nitka Tsar 3 years ago
I‘m a Mom of a Baby angel. I don‘t know your Mom, but I am always happy to talk about my baby angel.
Load More Replies... Monday 3 years ago
We had a teacher in primary school who found out something like this. It apparently affected her so profoundly she thought it a good idea to share the story of how her older brother (who died before she was born) drank antifreeze by mistake and let out his last breath just as they met the doctor to a classroom of 9 year olds. On the plus side after that day the whole class understood that kids can die and we should be very careful with our lives.
Huddo's sister 3 years ago
I imagine it was a consequence of sudden emotion mixed with an intended teachable moment that just did not come out well.
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Momogi 3 years ago
It reminds me of my older sister who died before I was born. When my mom told me about her, I imagine how life would be different if I had her around. We can talk and hang out, sharing secret, she can show me what is wrong and right, and a shoulder to cry on. But also it's pointless to have that though but I miss her.
Kelli 3 years ago
My mom delivered a stillborn boy prior to having me. I never knew until I was an adult. Which is hard to believe because I had three other older siblings that never told me. I don’t believe it was really deliberate, just something nobody talked about. Had way juicier family secrets anyway. 😂😂
Nitka Tsar 3 years ago
I don‘t get why they would not tell their other kids. Has anyone an idea? My first baby died shortly before birth and my other children grew up knowing about it. We have a picture of her beside other family pictures and we talk about her sometimes. I grew up knowing about a deceased older sibling, too.
Huddo's sister 3 years ago
Some people just think it is easier on themselves if they don't talk about a loss, but really I think it makes it harder.
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Kiri 3 years ago
My godmother had a child that was their pride and joy. At age three she sadly past from a heart attack. My great grandma blames her self because she died in her arm instead of her mother and she could of call 911. My great grandma and my other aunt (the child cousin) say that she visit them in dreams and asked them to tell the mother she is happy and okay. (My family is very sensitive to the paranormal) Even if she died way before I was born I still cry.
Huddo's sister 3 years ago
My sister would talk to my Nan a lot as a child, even though she died before she was born. She said she missed her even though she never met her.
Load More Replies... #5
That my "mom" is actually my grandma, my "dad" is my step grandpa, and my "sister" who is 13 years older than me is my mom. And my biological dad was 21 when he got her pregnant.
Jennifer Norton 3 years ago
That's how Jack Nicholson grew up. He didn't find out till he was well into adulthood that his sister was actually his mother!
#6
My great grandpa murdered one of his own children. The family was a bunch of poor backwoods hicks and having trouble feeding their kids. My great grandma was pregnant and didn't learn until delivery that she was pregnant with twins. Great grandpas solution was to bash one of the babies heads against the wash basin. My grandpa wrote a letter to my mom on his deathbed and this was one of the things he wrote about in the letter. When my mom told me my blood turned to ice water. The sheer evilness completely shocked me.
Lyone Fein 3 years ago
This was probably during the dustbowl years, or the depression? So it may have been less to do with being backwards or crazy or whatever other derogatory comments people are thinking, and more to do with sheer desperation. Many people were living on the edge of starvation for years back then.
DDmaybeandor 3 years ago
I can’t judge this man. This doesn’t sound like the actions of a cold hearted murderer but the actions of a poor and desperate person.
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Trish Smith 3 years ago
It's not all ways true of "country-folk". I'm from the country and I consider myself a truly caring, loving individual. I also actually graduated college and married outside my family. Please give it a rest with the demeaning stereotypes! It's truly insulting to a lot of good, king, and decent segment of our population!
Hobby Hopper 3 years ago
This kind of cruelty is more common than you would think. Human beings are infinitely capable of terrible deeds. Thankfully, most of us are conditioned from a young age to be empathetic and nonviolent, but I can't help but wonder how close we are to the edge, of being pushed into monstrous acts in the wrong situation. Pushed by desperation caused by poverty, of helplessness, by a sense of injustice, by addiction, or simply an angry fugue in the heat of the moment.
Randolph Croft 3 years ago
That story is not unique. Too many mouths to feed led to children working in factories. Among other things.
Trish Smith 3 years ago
Oh dear God!! What a horrific thing to happen, as well as, discover!! :(
Shelby Moonheart 3 years ago
It was hinted that my great grandfather fathered a child with his youngest daughter.
However, every secret comes with an aspect of forgetting. “If you remove any deliberate malice, some people sometimes simply forget what can and cannot be shared,” Tang told us. “My husband will say to me - don't tell me anything about anyone, because I will forget what I have to keep a secret. While this has actually made me a better person, it's also worth knowing that sometimes it's nothing to do with intention to cause hurt, just that some people are forgetful!”
“At a push, one might also argue that those with low impulse control may also blurt out a secret when they are not focused on their interactions, and other things which can reduce our willpower can include intoxication and even a lack of sleep, which can reduce our cognitive focus,” Tang explained.
#7
My family owned black slaves. We're Native American.
Pisco 3 years ago
Everyone is capable of being evil, not only people with european origins. Many native american groups, like the mayans and the aztecs, had traditionally slaves as well. Its a terrible thing that most big civilizations have done. I imagine that modern native americans usually did not have slaves because they suffered a lot and didnt have the money. Not because they were more ethical than others.
Monday 3 years ago
It's also worth a thought that these people probably didn't think it was evil at all. It was just a normal thing people did and they never stopped to think about it long enough to have that epiphany.
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ADHORTATOR 3 years ago
Slavery was standard in most civilisations..... Fortunately, things have changed
elmortero 3 years ago
Unfortunately that is not correct. Apparently there is more slavery today than there ever was in history..A Wikipedia article states that there are estimated to be between 38 an 46 million people in slavery, bases on numbers of the International Labour Organisation
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Christina Hahs 3 years ago
The Cherokees, among other Native Americans, owned black slaves in an attempt to make themselves more “civilized” like the Europeans who settled around them. The Salish of the Pacific Northwest also owned slaves, who were slaves for life, with their children also automatically becoming slaves. That one I just learned and it threw me for a loop because I grew up in a school district that taught a lot about the original inhabitants of the land and they missed that big detail!
Phil Green 3 years ago
Even Black people owned slaves. There is nothing for which you ought to be ashamed. This is how it was. What we choose to do now is what defines us, not the past of our forebears.
Barbara Vandewalle 3 years ago
There were several plantations owned by blacks who had black slaves.
Load More Replies... Jennifer Norton 3 years ago
The reason this seems shocking is because history is not always written down correctly, actually most of the time. It's part of American history that white/black/Native American... all kinds owned slaves! It was the thing to do at the time!
Will I Will-Ham 3 years ago
The word slave comes from slavic. So there had been slaves long time before the looting of africa. Iirc on one of the first pages of the bible had written on it: " it is gods will to have slaves"🤮 Never came further reading that bs-not my god and dev not what my heart believes
Arnavet 3 years ago (edited)
You are correct on the word origin, but That's not a verse in the Bible. Sounds like something someone wrote in or else a version that was pulling some stuff. Not a good one.
Load More Replies... #8
So, ever since I started living in apartments for myself, I've had these big pink towels, and every time someone brought it up I've told this story. When I got the first apartment, I went to visit my grandparents with my mom so we could raid her basement for stuff she had lying around that I could use in my new home. And among the stuff that we found were these giant boxes of big pink towels and jasmine incense. Now, the towels I didn't question, but my grandparents didn't seem like the type to use incense, let alone in bulk, so I asked about it. And when I did, my mom and my grandma shared a look and one said to the other "I guess he's old enough to know." So the story goes that my grandpa, amongst other things, ran two shopping centers. At one point, one of these shopping centers had a massage parlor. They seemed alright and always paid their rent. Then one day my grandpa gets a call that eyewitness accounts went something like this: "Hello. Yes, this is .... ....... . Yes. Yes, what... A WH*REHOUSE?! WHAT DO MEAN I'M RUNNING A WH*REHOUSE?!" Apparently, this was a "full-service" massage parlor and the owner split once the cops got wind of it, leaving behind the whole operation. So my grandpa technically became the owner of a very large supply of pink towels, jasmine incense, baby oil, and tissues. And, never one to throw things away, he kept all of it in his basement. And they were pretty good towels, so I took a bunch and some of the jasmine incense. I may call them for more at some point.
#9
My father had an affair with his brother's wife so my cousin is also my brother.
my cousin doesn't know though, grandma let this slip whilst wasted
eff the haters 3 years ago
I think you confused the species this is a wreath
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thEBOrdeSTpaNDA 3 years ago
I need to draw this family tree. Assuming grandma is the OP's father and uncle's mum: Screenshot...3d-png.jpg 
Amy Taylor 3 years ago
My dad's brother's wife had an affair with his uncle and my youngest cousin (she's the youngest of 5 kids) is his daughter. Everyone in the family acts totally normal about it but we don't talk about it.
Emperor Kitten 3 years ago
Your cousin isn't biologically your cousin then. He's just your half brother.
However, when it comes to keeping secrets, the sharing is more often than not a deliberate act, Tang argues. “Some friendships are sadly hazardous to our mental health - especially if someone is deliberately choosing to tell our secrets - this can happen in a toxic friendship where perhaps jealousy or envy results in one party ‘acting out’ rather than working to develop their own strengths within themselves.”
#10
My great uncle who never "settled down" and died of "cancer," was actually gay and died of AIDS in the 80s.
Mrs. Jan Glass 3 years ago
I've had several jaw-dropping conversations over the last few weeks with high school kids who don't understand the impact of AIDS in the 80s, and seem to think it was NBD. They can't fathom that when you came out back then, you were immediately ostracized because the average American thought you were passing AIDS to everyone just by existing. You didn't come out and then get a loving party or supportive social media message: no, your parents kicked you out, and you ended up on the streets, where drugs and tricks were inevitable. Today, they can't fathom that most of the gay people we knew then were dead before they reached 30, and that's why there "aren't as many" gay Gen Xers and boomers compared to younger generations. It's not because people weren't gay, it's that being gay was a death sentence. Most of them never held a beloved friend as they died, screaming in pain from AIDS-related meningitis, and it shows.
Memere 3 years ago
Don't know why you got downvoted, but what you say is the truth, I remember it very well. It was terrifying for anyone to come out during the 80s.
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Sky Render 3 years ago
I really hate straightwashing... So many "single uncles/aunts" who "just happened" to live with a same-sex "roommate" for their entire adult lives were in fact gay.
Samantha 3 years ago
There was so much shame regarding homosexuality that even having a gay family member could cost you a job, a mate, social staus... Actually BEING gay cost everything: family, friends, career, even your safety. I'm so in awe of the courageous gay and Trans folks who chose not to hide when hiding seemed the only choice. We should be celebrating their bravery, not covering it up.
Load More Replies... Hobby Hopper 3 years ago (edited)
My parents would say "he's a confirmed bachelor". I didn't put 2 and 2 together and figure out what they meant until years later as an adult living on my own. The way they talked, you would think someone being anything other than straight and cisgender just wasn't even a thing.
Alex Smith 3 years ago
That is so heartbreaking. I am glad his nephew learned the truth. That poor man didn't get to live is truth when he was alive.
James G. Currie 3 years ago
Well, heightened risk of cancer *is* an acknowledged result of HIV infections. So, he may have died from the cancer.
#11
Great grandma was a witch who could speak to spirits. I figured out that she was obviously a bit touched when I was diagnosed with schizophrenia with delusions, which was probably exactly what she had. Thank goodness for good mental health professionals
Lara Verne 3 years ago
Like my aunt. When I was about 7, she started talking about aliens. She said she met them and they're still talking to her, but no one else could hear them. She was diagnosed with schizophrenia later.
Terry Tobias 3 years ago
When I was in the psychiatric wing of the hospital after a suicide attempt, the doctors asked me to ask my mom if anyone else in the family had ever had any history of mental illness. She asked my aunt, my father's sister, about her side of the family and she told an interesting story of a great-great aunt who everyone in the family had talked about as having "multiple personalities". From what my aunt recounted, this woman could seem like two different people, and on one day had left her young children unattended in the horse cart when she went into a store to go shopping. While I was at the hospital I was diagnosed as being bipolar, which made us think that this woman had actually had the same disorder more than a century ago!
AzKhaleesi 3 years ago
What if..... What if, Schizophrenia is an ability to talk to spirits but no one believes in it so they label it that just to "normalize" it a bit more, and when they hear the bad stuff it's demons. That would be wild.
Wonderful 3 years ago
That’s probably exactly what people thought before it became known as a mental illness. Imagine all the exorcisms are just people with mental health issues lashing out with what they know. Evil religious crazy stuff.
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Kai 3 years ago
I think spiritual abilities vs mental issues can be differentiated by cause and effect: is the stuff they hear actually accurate and helpful? If so, I don't see what the problem is.
Wonderful 3 years ago
The problem is that how do you tell the difference? When one is screaming while the next is whispering and the other is singing and the last one is wailing like a banshee. And what seems right to you might not seem right to the rest of the world. That’s how you get microwaved babies. It’s a very fine line. Some just hear a whisper others hear a crowd. Is the whisper a ghost or is the one little girl in the crowd that’s crying , “help” the ghost?
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Saint Thomas 3 years ago
No, because neither are real things. I'm all for "live and let live" when it comes to beliefs, but (mental) health is a serious thing and should not be taken lightly or associated with spiritual b******t. That can lead to situation where people die of cancer because they think essential oils are going to cure them, or people with mental disorders don't get the help they need.
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#12
That my mom had fake boobs from a career as a swimsuit model in the 80s.
Shelby Moonheart 3 years ago
My mm had breast implants. I didn't find out until a year before she died. I never asked her why though.
Linda Lee 3 years ago
Fake boobs were all the rage in the 80's. Then women realized that having surgery to...well, I'm glad it's going out of style l
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According to Tang, “it becomes all too easy to, rather than to show acceptance of difference or even learn from that other person, try to negate that of the other or try and wield power over them.” Moreover, “Sharing someone's secret, especially one we know they might be ashamed of, is a great way to do both, and by bringing someone down (rather than working to raise ourselves up), we feel better about ourselves – and don’t need to admit we need to do something about our own insecurities,” she explained.
#13
That my mom and dad divorced because of my dad's affair... with his stepdaughter. My half sister. My mom's own daughter.
#14
I found out that my mom had this pet puppy that played too rough with her one evening and bit her hand (didn't break the skin, just freaked her out since she wasn't used to puppies) and my grandpa had everyone leave the house and he murdered the dog in the living room.
The day after I learned this, my mom and I went to visit my grandpa who was preparing to move out of state and wanted to give her some pictures he found. One of the pictures was of the little white dog and he caught my mom staring at it. My grandpa took it, chuckled to himself, and just lightly said, "Took care of that little guy." Absolute pyschopath.
Night Owl 3 years ago
I think he/she/they hit the nail on the head in this case - the guy is a psychopath
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*insertaestheticusername* 3 years ago
this guy has a special place in hell. and POOR DOGGO OMFG :,(
ChariotLee 3 years ago
Um...the exact same thing happened to me. Got attacked. Owner shot the dog in the living room. In front of me and his CHILDREN. I still remember the blood. No wonder I'm so mentally f****d up.
#15
My great grandfather was a horrible gambler. He was always losing money. In order to pay it back he "lent" out his daughters, he had 5 of them. They would do "wife" duties for the men who he owed money. It could be anything from making dinner, cleaning the house or having sex. I dont know for sure when it started but it ended when my grandmother was 8 and she was the youngest, the oldest was 17.
Lyone Fein 3 years ago
It is still that day, hun, all over the world including any place where men are in charge of a criminal operation.
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El Dee 3 years ago (edited)
This still goes on. A woman I know I remember her family from when she was young. I was older so I remember this better than she does. Her father was left on his own with her and he would invite his friends over, they'd buy all the drink and the smokes and they'd go 'upstairs to say hello' to the daughter. She thought he didn't know and was scared to tell him, I know that it was his idea and that's why they brought him booze. He's long gone and I haven't the heart to tell her. NB I didn't find this out until afterwards when there was a big scandal - but that was kept from her..
Sarah Kathrin Matsoukis 3 years ago
Just shoot him along with the men who accept this form of payment
dave morris 3 years ago
I wonder how many times the people, who he gambled with, cheated to mke sure that he woud lose so that they could get free "services". Evil people have no limits on their evil. The poor girld desered a better parent.
Edison Michael 3 years ago
After my grandfather (a HUGE a-hole) died, my granny moved to a damp shelter dug on bare earth at the farm of one of her sons-in-law. One night he brought a friend and asked granny and my aunts (she had 7 daughters and no sons) to say hi. Later on, granny heard her son-in-law telling his friend to "chose one" of them for the night. She confronted his wife (one of her daughters) and she just shrugged and said "You are living here for free, hun." Granny gathered the girls and ran away in the middle of the night. Given that's not an isolated case of how the family treated her and my aunts, I could NEVER fathom how my aunts are all extremely close and friendly towards each other now. They tell these stories as if they were quirky vignettes, between sips of tea: "remember when you tried to drown me on a basin because I asked for food I'm front of visits?". And they chuckle and go: "We were so temperamental...". I just... I can't with them.
Tang reminds everyone that we need to think carefully about our relationships and consider the behavior of those we choose to trust. “If someone is sharing secrets with you, how long will it be before they are sharing secrets with others?”
#16
Grandfather was a bit more important a Nazi than he admitted.
Will I Will-Ham 3 years ago
Mine too. Was always told he was one of the first 100 but thats fake news. The nsdap faked the first 100 memberships to look bigger than they were. But he was in prison right after the war and my granny had to flee for some years after war. I was really shocked when she showed me her golden hackenkreuz badge she kept. Quote:" who knows when we need that again" was her explanation when i asked why she kept it.
Kathi Schäffer 3 years ago
My great uncle was also pretty high in the Nazi hierarchy. My Dad told me he split when he realized that Germany was losing the war. Talk about a coward. Anyway, the important thing is that we do better today. Let's be better than our ancestors.
Charlie 3 years ago
Many higher-ranking Nazi’s just swept back into civilian life afterwards, without any repercussions. Heard about a former Nazi officer, with avid Nazi opinions just slithered back to everyday life becoming a Fire Chief in a larger city. But that's just it, most everyone at the time was Nazis, either by believe or semi forced. People had to earn their pay, they had families. The Nazi party had the power/money.
Load More Replies... E. Hamilton 3 years ago
Ooof that's rough... Bad family history rating scale; Nazi, slave owner, incest... The list keeps going...
#17
My great uncle was a boot legger in the Mafia that had the FBI searching for him. He ran to Canada and they never found him.
Mika N 3 years ago
You might have a romanticized view of the mafia. They weren't a nice bunch!
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Katy McMouse 3 years ago
My Great Uncle Gabby was a major bootlegger and owned a very popular speakeasy in our city. Because our family lived on Lake Erie and it was a short trip by boat to Canada, he was able to run liquor with great ease. The fact that a large portion of city government officials (including the mayor) and the police drank his booze, in his speakeasy, helped his endeavors. When someone was finally able to get the mayor to clamp down the operation, he wasn't jailed but the mayor exiled him to Cleveland for a long while. When he finally had enough, he came back into town and proceeded to ride a donkey back and forth in front of city hall, taunting the mayor and his city hall buddies. I guess after that, it was business as usual.
Allison B 3 years ago
Omg. That's actually really cool. Did you ever meet him? Sounds like he'd have been fascinating to talk to!
Load More Replies... Mary Leverett 3 years ago
My maternal grandmother, not known for sexual continence, just before marrying my grandfather, was a girlfriend of Legs Diamond. He sent a telegram to my grandfather, warning him to treat my grandmother well. Old Legs died of "lead poisoning" 4 months before my mother's birth, so he could conceivably (pun intended) be my grandfather.
Nimues Child 3 years ago
I'd be curious if you have Canadian cousins who could tell you the rest of his life's story.
Tracy Sellars 3 years ago
A friend of my partner says how nobody in his family like to mention uncle. Turns out he was spying for both sides towards the end of WWII with no one quite sure which side he was really on. I believe after the war he just disappeared.
Barbara Vandewalle 3 years ago
My dad's sisters' husband had a moonshine set up during prohibition. Dad was in town one day when the sheriff said he was going to jail my uncle. Dad went to warn my uncle. He just laughed saying the sheriff would have to arrest his mother first. She was running the biggest moonshine operation from Cheyenne Wyoming to the Colorado / New Mexico state line.
#18
My aunt with a very "holier-than-thou" attitude has been having a 40+ year affair with a childhood sweetheart. This is a person that was always quick to criticize other people's family issues and tried so hard to present her and her family as "perfect". Her husband is an as**ole to our family and she lets him completely get away with it. I guess we know why now.
Isa 3 years ago
I really hard people that think that they are better than any other, and they have this kind of dark, nasty secret. Just shut up, don't judge you damn prik. Arrrggg. My father is a nasty, selfish, pointing the finger and talking about every one. But for the outside world, is God in heaven and my father on earth. Everybody thinks that he's the perfect husband, the perfection incarnate...I have been putting the truth outhere, step by step. I'm sorry but I'm so angry with him and I want so much that his facade be discovered. He's been treating my mother as a slave for more than 60 years. He's the lord and the master.
Isabel Care 3 years ago
Greetings, my long lost sister. It seems we had the same father
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Lisa Valen 3 years ago
Maybe he's an a*****e 'cause she's been carrying on with some other fellow for 40+ years?
AmAndA_Panda 3 years ago
I just found proof that my husband is and has been having an affair. While telling me "you're a great mom and have a great marriage, your parents should be proud of you". These are the people that have to make sure everyone else things their lives are perfect because they can't handle how they really feel about themselves.
#19
My favourite uncle cheated on my auntie. Ended up knocking the woman up. She had the child and my uncle was forced to tell my aunt. Aunt divorced my uncle. He became an alcoholic and I had absolutely no idea.
I thought all the times we were going for car rides as a kid, he purposely drove crazy because it was entertaining for me and my cousins but it turned out he was just plastered.
Rick Edwards 3 years ago
On weekends when I was little I used to go with my stepdad “On Safari”. It was only years later that I realized we were bar hopping.
Seanette Blaylock 3 years ago
Amazing you kids survived, and that he didn't kill anyone in other cars!
Mrs. Jan Glass 3 years ago
Looking back on the number of times we were in moving vehicles with inebriated or incapacitated drivers is pretty jaw-dropping, isn't it?
Load More Replies... Mokayokok 3 years ago
** Raises hand ** Um yeah, why was he allowed to drive with you guys in the car?
Eva Muller 3 years ago
Alcoholics can be good at hiding their drunkness, when doing normal stuff. But driving can be different, as it takes more concentration. - my dad didn't like to drive, and I always wondered why, when I was younger, so my mother always drove. He was always drunk, but I never knew, cause he was just always happy. Sadly, he died because of it (liverfaliure)
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#20
Not my family, but I thought I'd contribute.
Friend turns 15, and she's told she's adopted. Turns out that both her parents died in a car crash when she was just a baby, and her uncle adopted her and raised her. Told her that both parents were dead.
A year later, a man messages her on Facebook saying that he's her half brother. Turns out the dad lived through the car crash and later remarried, her adopted parents were lying to her as they knew all along, the dad just didn't want to keep her.
That's the "secret", so to speak. However, the story continues, as her biological father wanted to meet her. She flies out to meet him, stays with him, meet his wife and her half-siblings. Struggles with the idea of reconnecting with him, because she both loathes and loves him. Loathes him for not wanting her and getting a new family, loves him for wanting to make a difference in her life and reconnect. She takes the plunge anyway. 6 months later he dies from lung cancer. Life's cruel joke on her.
Wandaluzt 3 years ago
It was posted 5 years ago on Reddit. So you're a bit late and on the wrong website.
Load More Replies... lenka 3 years ago
Probably not a popular opinion..... but sounds like the father was selfish until the end. He decides six months before he dies that he finally wants something to do with a child he abandoned? He was hoping for some kind of redemption arc? Puts his daughter through the trauma of learning to love him just so she can grieve him? This was not "life's cruel joke" this was entirely her fathers cruel joke.
Louise Clarke 3 years ago
I wonder if he wanted to reconnect with her because he knew he was dying and it would be his last chance.
#21
I didn't find out until recently, in my thirties. So at this age pretty much nothing shocks you. But it would have shocked me in my teens, when my mother was super religious, warning us against premarital sex. In my early twenties, she tried to stop my girlfriend and I from living together when we moved to a city where we knew no one. (Obviously, we lived together. But we had to hide it from her when she came to visit.) When some unmarried friends of mine had a baby unexpectedly, and the child was born with a physical handicap, she even insinuated to me that it was punishment from God for having a baby out of wedlock. So guess what... a few months ago, my aunt mentioned in passing that the reason my parents got married after only knowing each other four months was because my mother was pregnant. (She ended up miscarrying, which is why we'd never figured it out before.)
Yvonne Dauwalder Balsiger 3 years ago
A real hypocrite and probably deeply unhappy on top, too. If you don't want your kids knocked up early, teach them about safer sex and contraceptives AND put at least some condoms or something in your bathroom where they can find them, no questions asked.
AzKhaleesi 3 years ago
Exactly! I never understood this logic. I have talked openly to my kids about sex since they were old enough to understand (granted age appropriate stuff) and to this day Oldest - 20 didn't lose V card till 19 after adult. Middle 1 - almost 18 - still has V card. Middle 2 - almost 16 still has V card youngest - 14 no interest in anyone yet, still a video game addict. all because I was honest and open and they know it's not a game and they can come to me at any time. so wild.
Load More Replies... DDmaybeandor 3 years ago
A different take. Her baby died. She felt it was a punishment from God and kept her grief secret because of shame and guilt. She was so judgmental because she was afraid her children might experience the same pain from a vengeful and jealous God.
Sobri Kate 3 years ago
Likely. And even without the religiosity, parents don't want kids to make the same "mistakes." The unhealthy ones over protect and control.
Load More Replies... Trish Smith 3 years ago
Religion = hypocrites. I, personally, dumped religion and found God! I'm more spiritual now, and feel more connected to God, than I ever did in ALL the years I spent attending church! The hypocrisy's of the congregation "almost" made me a non-believer. I love the relationship and spiritual awaking that I have, now, with God. He/She/Whatever you call your Higher Power, is a kind, loving Being that does not condemn people to Hell's fires for "perceived" sins. That is a job for the hypocrites in churches. JMHO
Tori Wilson 3 years ago
Personally I am totally down with what you are saying here. It's awesome and amazing
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Pipe Kasuko 3 years ago
She is/was probably trying to protect her children from possible suffering of the same guilt and pain of the loss of a child - miscarriages take a much bigger toll on women than most people can fathom. Mind you, for whatever reason, she might perceive miscarriages as a guaranteed punishment for pre-marital sex without exception! Society and their own religious beliefs, if any, conjure the absolute worst possible plausible reasons - all with one single conclusion - that what happened was a punishment for their actions. Most people call it religion, others call it karma, and other names - whatever it is - it cuts deep and like any other traumatic event, bears huge scars.
Mrs. Jan Glass 3 years ago
This is right in line with my religious family, too. One uncle spent most of my life suggesting that I was a big ol' s**t because I was on the pill when I was 17, and HIS daughters would NEVER engage in such SHAMEFUL behavior. Not only were both of his daughters pregnant when they graduated high school, he then ended up in a sexual live-in relationship with his first cousin. They'd sit around smoking pot talking about how lazy and criminal black- and brown people are. OTOH, they were "soulmates," so gay people were totally destroying the sanctity of marriage and the American family, but how dare anyone judge THEM for their cousin-f*****g? Ladies and gentlemen, American Christian Conservatives!
Hobby Hopper 3 years ago (edited)
What a couple pieces of work! To be fair though, you find all kinds involved in religious establishments, including some truly [internally] beautiful people, and churches/organizations are far from all the same. Some use religion as a way to feel superior, especially when they clearly have nothing else going for them, just like some use white supremacy as a way to feel superior. I think their attitude towards "black- and brown people" is pretty telling.
Load More Replies... Emperor Kitten 3 years ago
Maybe she found religion after the miscarriage. It could explain her strong opinions and negate some of the hypocrisy.
Linda Lee 3 years ago
That same exact thing happened with my parents. They married very quickly because she was pregnant but then miscarried. But wait there's more! My father knocked up a woman in Japan during World War 2. He tried to reconnect with her but his letters were never answered. He always put cash in the envelopes.
M Calad 3 years ago (edited)
Oh, I know a similar story. The mother of my best friend (middle of three sisters) used to criticise harshly sexual relationships and pregnancies outside marriage. She told these girls many times how shameful and terrible would be if they got pregnant while unmarried. Well, when they were adults one of them found their parent's marriage certificate and noticed the date was close to the birth of the oldest sister. They asked an "aunt" (mother's cousin) about it, and she told them the truth: their mother got pregnant of the father when they met for the first time at a party. Their mother was a spoiled single child coming from a good family. Their father (a lazy party guy) came from a big but rather poor family. When he was informed of the pregnancy, the father ran away to his parent's house because he didn't want to take responsibility, but his father forced him to get married. It was a very unhappy marriage. Her family never forgave her and treated them all quite badly.
#22
That the women that my dad was having sex with (cheating on my mom) were all men.
Bonus: They are still married 30 years later.
Laura Ketteridge 3 years ago
Why is it shocking that it was men, rather than women, the person's dad was cheating with. The shock should be he cheated with multiple people, not their sexes.
Monday 3 years ago
My question is though, is he cheating on the mom or is the mom perfectly okay with the relationship? If she's a beard she wouldn't care that he was banging guys after all.
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Wang Zhuang 3 years ago
Both would be shocking to me if I were the OP. I wouldn't expect my dad to be cheating on my mom, nor would I expect my dad to be sleeping with men.
Shane S 3 years ago
With the word “cheating” I’m going to assume they didn’t have any arrangement. Some couples open up their marriage and one partner feels more comfortable if their other half is only cheating with the same sex.
Edison Michael 3 years ago
Yes, but at the same time, having an arrangement is not really the kind of thing one would usually tell their kids about, so they would assume cheating took place, just like they assume parents are straight.
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Jason Marin 3 years ago
A shorter version could have been, "My dad was cheating on my mom with other men."
#23
My grandma inherited several hundred thousand dollars from her step dad.
The juicy part is that to this day, no one knows how he got it. No one even knew he had that kind of money until he died. Since I'm from the south, my guess is rum running or something like that but we don't know and likely never will.
#24
That my aunt wasn't born looking like that, When she was younger some kids in the neighborhood ganged up on her and attacked her with a 2x4. I never knew and once I found out I just felt so sorry for her. I was never told what happened to the attackers.
Liv 3 years ago
Why though. I don't understand children cruelty. I'm so tired of hearing (usually) men say "oh when I was young I'd kill/torture this animals when I was playing outside with my buddies... Hehe boys... I'm a grown man now so I've learned better... Still kinda funny... Oh wild free times...". Is it lack of love and good values at home? Lack of responsibility, too much time on their hands without direction?
Huddo's sister 3 years ago
I would guess family have particular opinions that becomes ingrained in kid's thinking, or neglect (but that in itself isn't probably enough)
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zububonsai 3 years ago (edited)
For all wondering like me what a "2x4" is: (inches), piece of wood, sizeable enough to hit someone. (Thank you, Urban dictionary.) We have centimeters here and call it "Kantholz". Still ouch.
gila the night/sand 3 years ago
Kids can be evil sometimes (usually it’s the fact that they were raised badly tho)
Zedrapazia 3 years ago
What's a 2x4? Did these bastards attack her with some army knife or gun??
Powerful Katrinka 3 years ago
It's the measurement of a large piece of lumber.
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#25
Not so much a family secret I learned, but when I learned our "family secret" wasn't so secret at all. Growing up my grandparents would make popovers for every family gathering. For whatever reason my parents told me that popovers were our family's secret recipe, or maybe I was just a stupid kid and thought a secret recipe meant nobody else made that food at all. Anyway, fast forward about 20 years when my wife and I were at a restaurant and they had popovers on the menu. I wondered out loud how this restaurant knew our family's secret recipe. My wife got confused and asked to to explain, whereupon I immediately realized how dumb I was. She will never let me forget that.
Tiffi 3 years ago
Welp, I though you could only get ginger ale on the airplane. I called it airplane champagne. Imagine my suprise when I saw it for sale at the supermarket when I was about 8 years old. I still call it airplane champagne to this day for nostalgia. Cracks my hubby up every time. He knows the story, because my dad told him.
Grudge-holding Treefrog 3 years ago
I have found that many people haven’t heard of popovers, but they are batter poured into a muffin tin and baked. When you pull them out of the oven, they have overflowed the divots of the tin and have risen up. You can make them sweet or savory. My personal favorite is with dark chocolate
Mika N 3 years ago
I'm from northeast America (New England area) and people here consider them a local thing, but looking up Yorkshire pudding like someone mentioned, they look pretty similar.
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Wonderful 3 years ago
My dad told me he was the main character in the movie “Hamburger hill” and that the movie was a documentary about him and his squad. I believed that til I was 12 or so and realized I was a huge idiot. When I was around 7 I also thought water towers were mayonnaise towers and the color of the tower told you how good it was. I saw a brown tower one day and my friends mom had to explain to me that I was a moron.
#26
That Great grandpa was a decorated soldier who fought in the Indian regiment of british troops in WW1. In reality, he was a cook, who deserted after seeing men sent to attack machine guns with their bodies. Him and a bunch of others Nope'd the f**k out of there while stealing a bunch of supplies. This was corroborated by the other deserters that returned with him. Took them a few years to get from france to vadodara in the current state of gujarat, India They sold the guns and rations along the way for money and great grandpa picked up an STD from a iraqi wh*re (luckily grandpa was born before he left). They blame the STD on why he went "funny" in the head towards his end. Also the little bit of money he brought back from the stolen and sold army gear helped my grandpa buy some land and kick start my family fortunes so that we could move out of the untouchable class.
AsexualShrimp 3 years ago
Slay! I think the classes are complete idiocy. Everyone is equal. Luckily it’s banned now but if it was banned back then, your great grandpa wouldn’t have had to go thru those hardships.
James G. Currie 3 years ago
Whether Dalit from India, Burakumin from Japan, etc.; it still affects persons to this day. Jobs are denied, marriages forbidden, etc. It may be illegal, but that doesn't stop it form happening.
Load More Replies... Cara G 3 years ago
Although I'm not crazy about the use of the word here either, I think it was only intended as a synonym for prostitute and not necessarily an insult to the woman/women in general. That's how I read it. As in, this particular woman also happened to be a sex worker with an STI that was transmitted to Grandpa. Not that women are dirty, disease carrying wh0res. I could be wrong but that's how it struck me.
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Connie Hirsch 3 years ago
I'm sure the PTSD didn't help his mental state, either. Note: the penalty for desertion was death, so when he went on the run, he really had to commit to it.
Brenda Pereira 3 years ago
They were probably right about the STD causing him to go "funny" in the head. Uncured syphilis causes dementia when older.
#27
I'll submit one b/c I think it's totally nuts, but it wasn't my family's secret. Family that I've known my whole life lived across the street, the daughter of the family married a cousin of mine, etc. Learned just a couple years ago that the dad of the family didn't go away to the Peace Corp for those years he was gone in the '80's when we were kids. He was in prison for trying to rob a bank b/c the family hit such hard times when their second kid was born. The dad is the sweetest person ever and we never doubted for a second that he would do something like join the Peace Corp (that kind of guy), but the prison thing was a real wtf moment for EVERYONE.
Kimberly Herbert 3 years ago
I had multiple schoolmates whose father and sometimes both parents went on an 18-month - 2 years around the world vacation. They all were in federal prison for white-collar crimes. They were accepted back by most of the adults. I remember hearing my Dad say those that just accepted hem back probably had similar acts in their past. He didn't trust those people.
#28
You might need to draw a diagram to understand this one. My dad was born when my grandma was 18 and my "grandpa" was 14. He never looked like his "dad" and always thought his mom had an affair (for context, my dad's family is all Lebanese but he is very fair-skinned, which was partially why he assumed it had been an affair). When his "dad's" father, my great-grand-father, was on his death bed due to cancer, a relative confessed to my dad that his "grandfather" was actually his father. My dad had my stepmom take hair out of his real father's head and had it sent for DNA testing which confirmed it (yeah, little morbid if you ask me). So basically, my grandma had an affair with a married man when she was 18, had one, possibly 2, children with him, then married his SON and had another 4 kids. So my dad's siblings are both his siblings and his nieces/nephews, and the man who raised him is actually his brother. Yeah, I don't talk to that side of the family anymore.
Hussein Abdulhadi 3 years ago
I read your story thrice and still don't get it. That family tree is messed up
-Insert-name- 3 years ago
ok so father of op (ill call him jeff so you can understand). Jeff's mother was 18 when she had his but his dad was 14. Jeff was suspicious that his mom had an affair since his dad was 14 and jeff was light skinned and his family was not. Jeffs grandpa was dying a relative told jeff that his grandpa was his dad. So Jeff's mother fcked a guy had two kids with him, married his son and then had four kids with his son. This means that Jeff's "sibling" ar actually his nieces and nephews and his "dad" is his brother. Does that make sense?
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Debbie 3 years ago
"So basically, my grandma had an affair with a married man when she was 18,"" Did she have much of a choice? What about the men? Why blame her? "Guy in his 30's knocks up an 18yo but doesn't take responsability but pushes son forward to take responsability". Or something like that. How many years ago was this? How much say had this woman in all of it?
#29
My great grandfather was a quiet kind man and treasurer for his chapter of the Elks Lodge in Texas. He was attacked on his way home from an Elks Lodge meeting. He suffered amnesia and regained consciousness as a sailor on his way to Haiti. After landing, he lived in the country for a few months before getting into a bar brawl with a police officer and getting knocked out. He regained consciousness in jail, with a new-found memory of who he was. Her told this tale to a priest from jail, who believed him and wanted to help. The priest wrote my great grandmother and the American government and somehow convinced the Haitian government to let him return to America. He returned to my great grandmother, had two children, and was a law abiding citizen for the rest of his life. This story is so UNBELIEVABLE that when my mother told it to me 6 months ago I was convinced it was a hoax. She has documents (the letters from the priest and others) and testimonials of his friends that say this behavior was uncharacteristic. I dunno, crazy man.....
Jrog 3 years ago
This story sounds so UNBELIEVABLE because this is not remotely close to how amnesia, regaining memory, jail, government and even grandmothers work.
Lazy Panda 3 years ago
Awfully convenient to get the memory of his identity back RIGHT when he was facing jail time.
#30
My grandmother as I knew her was a hyper religious Christian woman that had every bit of conservative 1950's social viewpoints (she was racist, sexist, etc)
Found out she was pimped out at 16, got pregnant by the pimp, she didn't want the kids as her father would kill her as they were mixed-race, so the pimp took custody and moved to a different state.
She was the door kicker in a motorcycle gang. Her brother killed a guy and is serving life in prison - she was part of the same gang.
My uncle being a murderer wasn't a shock as he's been imprisoned since before I was born and I had visited him when I was young.
Wonderful 3 years ago
I asked my husband if he knew. He thinks with the context of the story that she was the first one through the door to kick some a*s. Like a enforcer I guess? Someone causes trouble and she’s the first one there for the fight. Maybe?
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#31
Maybe an inverse sort of deal, but my family were apparently millionaires in the late 1800s. I guess they had always been very wealthy. But between that wealth getting split up every generation and my family living on the run for many generations, all that money was gone by the time I came around. Only thing left was a chunk of property in Mexico that is completely worthless aside from a small bit of money from it cause there's a highway going through it.
This totally shocked me because in my lifetime my family has been quite poor. Full on redneck on top of that. And lots of issues with addiction.
Saint Thomas 3 years ago
Tell that to any owner of a piece of land in Pripyat :-)
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Fall F. 3 years ago
Yeah, the stereotype: great-great-great grandpa made the fortune,and in 100 years all you got from, are addictions.
Powerful Musk Ox 3 years ago
While addiction was no doubt amplified by personal losses, please do not forget it is a mental disorder, and much more complicated than any stereotype lets on.
Load More Replies... #32
When I was 13 years old, I was initiated into the family witchcraft tradition. The biggest shock was running into two classmates at a Sabbat (Pagan holiday).
#33
My dad is a straight man. Everyone in the family assumed he fell somewhere on the LGBTQ spectrum but he had to marry mom for appearance sake back in the '60s. We were wrong. No Transparent shenanigans for us. He fooled around on mom with another woman.
Mika N 3 years ago
Or he really could've just been straight but not stereotypically "masculine" and everyone assumed.
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#34
I found out very recently that my maiden name (and subsequently rest of my family's name) was supposed to be completely different but was changed by deed poll when my grandfather was 11 by his stepfather. So before my father, we aren't actually related to anyone with this surname, it means nothing to our heritage or whatever
lenka 3 years ago
Basically a legal document to change your name used in the UK and other legal systems inherited from the UK (i.e. the colonies) such as Australia, New Zealand.
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Rick Seiden 3 years ago
My great grandfather came from Belarus, through Europe. His name was something like Kwasha. In a bar in Germany there was some sort of incident and someone grabbed my great grandfather by his shirt and asked him what his name was. My great grandfather didn't speak a whole lot of German, so he though the guy was asking what the shirt was made of. He answered "Zeider" or something similar. Everyone laughed and it broke the tension. He became known as "Zeider" and when he came to America it became "Zeiden." Then at some point my family decided to make it "Seiden" to be less German.
Sylvia Schmitz 3 years ago
But Seiden actually makes it more german. It means silken, whereas the other word doesn't mean anything in german.
Load More Replies... #35
One is mine. One is my friends
Mine: Uncle killed a man in the old country. Gang fight. Picked up one of those big cigarette garbage things and hit another dude in the head. He did time in jail and was disowned by his family. My mom is the only person to visit him.
My friend. He was told his parents died. Turns out his dad is his uncle and the woman who raised him (his "aunt") is actually his mom
Nadja Lambacher 3 years ago
"He was raised by by a woman who told him she was his aunt. In actuality she was his mother. His biological father is her brother and technically his uncle"
Mika N 3 years ago
On the second one, it says "the woman who raised him" as though she raised him alone, so I'm guessing she doesn't live with the uncle/dad, maybe is single. My guess would be the bio father had an affair with his sister-in-law, and the sister-in-law raised the kid. Something like that.
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What do you think ?
Ansi 3 years ago
I am the only one of my parents/siblings that knows this: My grandmother told me that my grandfathers little brother didn't fall out of a boat and drowned like everybody thought. He was actually homosexual and killed himself by drowning. 💔
Wonderful 3 years ago
Poor guy. It’s so sad that there are so many stories like this. Thankfully it’s gotten better.
Load More Replies... Octavia Hansen 3 years ago
Wished I would have been told sooner about my grandmothers. Both brought their families to America around 1900. One made bathtub gin to sell during hard times, keeping the family together & fed. The other was a virtuoso musician, giving concerts & teaching until a stroke in her 60s. Damn! These were women who survived and helped the family along the way! And I have their backbone!
NicNor5560 3 years ago (edited)
My super religious aunt and uncle - they lived right across the church and went there 3 times a day - sold moonshine during the Depression. I was shocked. Their first born was a priest who married a nun and had a child together. My cousin was one of the most-loved mayor in their city. One of my uncles (brother to that same aunt) was part of the mafia in Toronto when he died; never could find which one though when I grew up. I was fascinated. My parents are first cousins. My father is the youngest brother of my super religious aunt (who actually married her 3rd cousin) and my mother is her cousin but was my cousin's (the priest one) best friend - they're the same age.
Dre Mosley 3 years ago
One of my older cousins was date raped in college and impregnated. She didn’t want the child. Her brother and his wife adopted him, so his “aunt” is his bio mom and his “dad” is his uncle. He’s like 30 now, and I don’t know if he knows.
SoloDadof3 3 years ago
My biggest family secret ... My mother and my siblings are all racist and homophobic. (And while I do not rather like the (whatever)phobic term, in this context it is used correctly, as in a unnatural fear.) --- I refuse to teach my children hate or racism! (It is a taught behavior, but one can choose NOT to follow it!)
Remi 3 years ago
Our family 'secret' if you can even call it that was that my cousin is actually my cousin. We all thought she wasn't my uncle's kid because she looks so different. (Much lighter skin and hair than anyone on that side of the family.) Turns out, she just she just somehow hit the hidden blonde genes from both parents as proven by gene testing. Her parents were experimenting with swinging at the time she was conceived so no one was being cheated on mind you
Littlemiss 3 years ago
Some of these were like reading the aita stories, some with a smudge of truth coated in b.s
Notyomama 3 years ago
My Grandfather had a brother on the spectrum. He married a woman also on the spectrum. Her family pimped her out and she gave my uncle an STI. My Grandparents had to get him a divorce. Never knew he was married (he was not high functioning) until after my Grandparents had passed.
Ansi 3 years ago
I am the only one of my parents/siblings that knows this: My grandmother told me that my grandfathers little brother didn't fall out of a boat and drowned like everybody thought. He was actually homosexual and killed himself by drowning. 💔
Wonderful 3 years ago
Poor guy. It’s so sad that there are so many stories like this. Thankfully it’s gotten better.
Load More Replies... Octavia Hansen 3 years ago
Wished I would have been told sooner about my grandmothers. Both brought their families to America around 1900. One made bathtub gin to sell during hard times, keeping the family together & fed. The other was a virtuoso musician, giving concerts & teaching until a stroke in her 60s. Damn! These were women who survived and helped the family along the way! And I have their backbone!
NicNor5560 3 years ago (edited)
My super religious aunt and uncle - they lived right across the church and went there 3 times a day - sold moonshine during the Depression. I was shocked. Their first born was a priest who married a nun and had a child together. My cousin was one of the most-loved mayor in their city. One of my uncles (brother to that same aunt) was part of the mafia in Toronto when he died; never could find which one though when I grew up. I was fascinated. My parents are first cousins. My father is the youngest brother of my super religious aunt (who actually married her 3rd cousin) and my mother is her cousin but was my cousin's (the priest one) best friend - they're the same age.
Dre Mosley 3 years ago
One of my older cousins was date raped in college and impregnated. She didn’t want the child. Her brother and his wife adopted him, so his “aunt” is his bio mom and his “dad” is his uncle. He’s like 30 now, and I don’t know if he knows.
SoloDadof3 3 years ago
My biggest family secret ... My mother and my siblings are all racist and homophobic. (And while I do not rather like the (whatever)phobic term, in this context it is used correctly, as in a unnatural fear.) --- I refuse to teach my children hate or racism! (It is a taught behavior, but one can choose NOT to follow it!)
Remi 3 years ago
Our family 'secret' if you can even call it that was that my cousin is actually my cousin. We all thought she wasn't my uncle's kid because she looks so different. (Much lighter skin and hair than anyone on that side of the family.) Turns out, she just she just somehow hit the hidden blonde genes from both parents as proven by gene testing. Her parents were experimenting with swinging at the time she was conceived so no one was being cheated on mind you
Littlemiss 3 years ago
Some of these were like reading the aita stories, some with a smudge of truth coated in b.s
Notyomama 3 years ago
My Grandfather had a brother on the spectrum. He married a woman also on the spectrum. Her family pimped her out and she gave my uncle an STI. My Grandparents had to get him a divorce. Never knew he was married (he was not high functioning) until after my Grandparents had passed.
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