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Youth is a precious thing, in that you often can only appreciate it when it’s in the past. In your teenage years and 20s, it’s so easy to feel like you have all the time in the world and then, suddenly, you blink and you are thirty five with a mortgage. Like with any skill or investment, most of us probably wish we had started planning a lot earlier.
Someone asked “How did you “waste” your 20s?” and netizens shared the things they maybe should have done differently. So get comfortable as you scroll through, upvote your favorites and be sure to comment your own thoughts and experiences below.
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#1
Wasted mine by having a poor body image and low self esteem when I was actually thin and in shape.
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#2
Caring what people thought of me.
Anna Ekberg 1 year ago
They regret NOT caring or they regret caring what people thought of them?
#3
Spent way too much time worrying about the future instead of enjoying the present.
#4
I have stayed for a company that doesn't value my work and contribution to them, I have wasted a lot of opportunity because of that, I myself have to blame for it too I didn't have the courage to explore and try something new for my growth and development.
Lyoness 1 year ago
Quit. Quit now. I also spent more than 10 years at a company that didn't give 2 sh*ts about me, worked me like a dog for an abusive boss and was shocked when I quit. I was too afraid to leave because I had a family to support, but I paid for that money with my health and missing so much of my children's lives far more than it ever paid me. It took a mental break to convince me to leave. Don't let it get to that point.
#5
I married my first boyfriend. We were not a good match. I basically k*lled my body and mental health trying to be enough for him. I’m 30 now, about 4 years divorced, wayyy happier and learning what I want in life and learning who I want to be.
#6
Caring for others and always putting them first. I came 3rd or 4th or 5th. Everything suffered. Everyone took advantage.
troufaki13 1 year ago
I'm a people pleaser too. I've recently started saying no and people have not reacted well lol
#8
Not exactly wasted, but all I did was work, go home, sleep and repeat. Lost 95% of my friends, was a virgin all through my 20's . Now, 3 years past my 20's . I have a stable job, own my own house, but I am also one of the most introverted people I know, and that doesn't help with being single.
Ellinor 1 year ago (edited)
I know it's a detail, but being a virgin is not a bad thing. I think it's crazy that it's expected of people (or should I say children) to have s*x before their 18/20. I'm not judging the people who had sex in their teens, I'm just sad it has become expected and mocked when people don't comply.
#9
In a toxic relationship and not understanding how to invest in myself. I’m still working on the second part.
#10
Got a woman I barely liked pregnant, married her out of obligation and marriage was terrible and only lasted 3 months, worked s**t jobs to provide for my boy, got put on child support, got depressed, got fat, dreams went down the toilet, now I'm fat, old and poor.
#11
Waiting for a guy to propose and not pursuing a PhD.
Mike F 1 year ago
WTAF, it's not an either/or situation. If the individual is someone who would be an impediment then a person needs to move on. It's not a relationship if one partner is expected to "stagnate" for a relationship to come to fruition. I know the OP will never read this, but dammit, how can people put themselves in this position in the 21st century?! You have to grow into yourself, and if the "other half" isn't down with it then it's time to say sayonara, have a great life.
#12
My job took me around the world in my 20s. I got to travel to some pretty cool places and a lot of not so cool places. I got to hang with locals and see a lot of things tourists never saw. It was a cool experience.
The problem was I was a heavy drinker at that point in my life. Instead of using what little free time I had to see and learn about where I was at and see the sites I was focused on drinking and strip clubs. Yes we did go see some things and do cool s**t, but I could’ve done so much more. I passed up on opportunities to see things while I was traveling to spend time in dank, smelly bars or strip clubs where pathetic guys like me were drooling over women.
#13
Falling in love with a narcissist abusive piece of s**t that was my snitch for being involved in his crimes. Spent 4 years of my life in jail. Lost time I’ll never get back.
#14
Being with friends who don't have a care for their future or their well-being. Choose you company well OP.
Mike F 1 year ago
Your friends will only influence you as much as you allow. I ran with a bunch in my 20's that were pretty wild. I had a propensity to drink too much anyway, but this bunch were over the top. At some point I had a "come to Jesus" with myself and got in with a different group. That postponed the inevitable by a few years, but I never got into the trouble many of them did. My point is you have to be truthful with yourself and capable of some introspection.
#15
Went from going out drinking as much as possible to literally working 330+ days a year. Turns out you only have friends when you’re the fun guy lol.
Nicole Weymann 1 year ago
I'm divided on this one. I think balance is the key. OP turned his life by 180° - no wonder his "friends" (?) didn't immediately follow suit. To them it must have looked like he turned his back on them. He basically did. Find a hobby (not just drinking) and a small group of people to associate with, instead of a crowd of people whose only common ground is partying. And cut back on your job, else your job will eat your life, with nobody to turn to but people who are paid to keep you company, i.e. coworkers and servers/bar tenders.
#16
Staying in my bedroom, playing video game instead of living
Started when I was 18, i will be 26 in 8 days and im still living like this.
#17
Studying a degree i never used. 4 years at Uni, 2 years doing a masters and a ton of debt.
Magenta Blu 1 year ago
Yeah, me too. Not only I never used, but I never really liked or enjoyed. I only did it because it was expected from me and not having a degree "would be a waste".. ironic, right? And everyone now thinks i also "waste" my degree, because I don't use it. So it turned out everything i ever did or do is only a big waste
#18
Drifting from one low-paying dead-end blue-collar job to another.
VOTE if you live in the USA 1 year ago
The picture BP chose for this one is definitely... a choice.
#19
Trying to believe I’d be a professional musician.
#20
Laziness. Started getting my s**t together at 25, but I still feel perpetually behind at 30.
Lil Miss Hobbit 1 year ago
You are not behind in any way. Everyone is at different stages in life.
#22
Currently in 20's but wasting it because I'm afraid to venture out, kinda introvert here:(.
#24
By not doing anything. i basically became a hermit from 23 or so and did pretty nothing but sit in my basement and play video games. as my friends all moved out of the area, my social life went with them, and i never went out and created my own social life. instead i just.... sat at home and watched the world go by.
Bill Hankel 1 year ago
As many people have commented on other posts, it's not too late. Slow and steady progress will get you somewhere better!
#25
Depression. 👍🏻.
#26
I'm in a toxic relationship and having trouble figuring out how to invest in myself. I'm still trying to work on it.
#27
All these responses are actually making me feel a bit better about my wasted decade. All I did was play games. A combination of chronic pain and a crippling fear of strangers made me give up on a normal life and live as cheap and humble as I could. I couldn't get my driver's licence out of fear, couldn't hold a job for panic, have no friends or even many acquaintances and can't afford most hobbies. I'm nearing my 40s now and the experience at least helps save money. I learnt to enjoy things that are free and have even made money from some. Things like propogating plants from clippings. It took my twenties to get going. I continue to waste my life by most people's standards to this day.
#28
My 20’s were mostly a blur, I get flashbacks of it every once in a while. From what I do remember, it was just saaad.
#29
Did online nsfw stuff instead of therapy lol.
Anna Ekberg 1 year ago
Therapy is not a miracle worker, it only works if and when you are ready for it and maybe they were not ready for it then.
#30
Traveling the world. Had a lot of catchup to do for retirement starting in my 40s.
Agamemnon O'Neill 1 year ago
You regret travelling the world? That's time and money well-spent IMO. I wish I'd travelled more and didn't worry so much about saving.
Youth, being a treasure that is better appreciated in retrospect, greatly benefits from moments spent embracing simplicity and freedom. While we often look back and wish for more foresight, those formative years allow for the kind of unstructured enjoyment that's beautifully captured through the lens of tranquility found in carefree summers.
#31
To echo another comment, worked too much in the hope that it would set me up for the future. It didn’t. I got a PhD in the humanities, served me right for doing a useless major. So I gave up friends and fun in my 20s, and now I have no career and no friends.
#33
Going to medical school and becoming a doctor. If you want a personal/social life outside of work, 0/10 would not recommend Edit: obviously looking at some of these comments there are obviously worse ways you can “waste” your 20s, but the sentiment still stands 😂.
Magenta Blu 1 year ago
Did exactly this. I finished medical school because "no one quits at their 4th year" but I could never fit into the regular healthcare system and making a life based in other people's suffering. I couldn't live knowing how healthcare system works.
#34
In a religion that controlled most aspects of my life. Pushed getting married and having kids while in early 20s. I essentially gave away the freedom most people in their 20s have.
Judy Reynolds 1 year ago
But your kids will be grown when you are in your 40s, still young enough to explore the world!
#35
Getting into legal trouble. Years wasted dealing with probation officers, s****y lawyers, court hearings, jail time, fines etc. It’s so hard to dig out of once you’re in. Almost like it was designed that way..
#37
Drinking, smoking weed, then my dad died at 26 and I woke up.
#38
I was a legitimate mid-level d**g dealer with a tremendous d**g addiction and I dated a stripper from 20-28.
#40
I married my best friend. Turns out now that I'm 35 he doesn't love me anymore and wants a divorce. I'm so angry thinking of all my youth I wasted on him!!!
Anna Ekberg 1 year ago
Being angry cause you wasted your youth on the wrong person is like wasting the time you have now in the moment.
#41
Worked too much. I’ve never had a full week off for vacation. Yeah I have nice and cool material things, but spent what may be the best decade of my life punching a clock for a job I hate.
#42
Basically a combo of bar scene, then Skyrim, then getting fat with beer, and then figuring it out in my 30s.
#43
Got a huge student loan to go to film school. Spent my 20s as an actor crippled by the loan. Lost my agent at 29.
#46
I wasted my 20s to the wrong person for years, I am trying to get over it until now.
boredkitten 1 year ago (edited)
But many people did and even later in their lifes. But is this preventable? We need those lessons to know better when we get older and also sometimes things change over time
#49
I wasted my 20s started during pandemic, i invested my time to my work that stopped my growth and development, work that depleted my confidence and enthusiasm.
#50
I borrowed money from my parents to live in crappy apartments and took longer than I should have to finish university. Got out feeling like I was 4 or 5 years behind everyone. Left with more debt than I would have otherwise had. .
#53
I went to college, graduated, and now I can’t find a job. I could have been working gaining experience and money this whole time instead of wasting time in college.
#54
Maxed an ironman on oldschool runescape.
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Auntriarch 1 year ago (edited)
I wasted my 30's (in fact I probably wasted all my life but many people's standards, but I'm me not them). But I woke up and it would be a waste of my present to give it space in my head now.
Susie Elle 1 year ago
Taking too much after my mom. Bless her, she was loving and struggling, but in trying to do the best she could, she basically molded me into a copy of herself with the same issues she had and never knew how to fix. I'm only just finding out how much I actually take after her, the good things as much as the bad.
Magenta Blu 1 year ago
I wasted my youth going to college, getting a degree I don't use because I didn't want to get it in first place, all I wanted was to have a big family and kids. Now I'm too old for having biological kids and never got a significant relationship because I was busy in college and then everyone i meet was already married, divorced and scolded (so not looking to have any kind of relationships) or already have kids on their own, so they didn't want anymore kids. So here I am, old, alone, sad, without family, friends, or hope without a job, and without anyone who cares.
Emmy S. 1 year ago
I care ♥️ I believe in you, but can you believe in yourself? I think so; I used to think I never could believe in myself but I’m working on it now, which is one step farther than I used to be. And adopting or surrogacy is always an option!
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Auntriarch 1 year ago (edited)
I wasted my 30's (in fact I probably wasted all my life but many people's standards, but I'm me not them). But I woke up and it would be a waste of my present to give it space in my head now.
Susie Elle 1 year ago
Taking too much after my mom. Bless her, she was loving and struggling, but in trying to do the best she could, she basically molded me into a copy of herself with the same issues she had and never knew how to fix. I'm only just finding out how much I actually take after her, the good things as much as the bad.
Magenta Blu 1 year ago
I wasted my youth going to college, getting a degree I don't use because I didn't want to get it in first place, all I wanted was to have a big family and kids. Now I'm too old for having biological kids and never got a significant relationship because I was busy in college and then everyone i meet was already married, divorced and scolded (so not looking to have any kind of relationships) or already have kids on their own, so they didn't want anymore kids. So here I am, old, alone, sad, without family, friends, or hope without a job, and without anyone who cares.
Emmy S. 1 year ago
I care ♥️ I believe in you, but can you believe in yourself? I think so; I used to think I never could believe in myself but I’m working on it now, which is one step farther than I used to be. And adopting or surrogacy is always an option!
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