Over-the-top advertisements of children's accomplishments are everywhere. "Watch Matthew's game-winning shot!" a mom shouts to her Facebook friend uploading a video. "Little Susie is years ahead in math!" a dad proclaims at a family barbeque.
But often these compliments can get a little out of hand; moms and dads aren't impartial when it comes to their kids' abilities. Whether they realize they're doing it or not, they can easily over-exaggerate.
And when they do, they end up on the subreddit called r/WokeKids. The number one internet archive of proud parents. Continue scrolling to check out our hand-picked posts from this entertaining online community and a few random pictures we found elsewhere that we thought are very appropriate and go with its content well. Enjoy!
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Yea Sure
Enough Of Your S**t, Rebecca
All this child-centered bragging, despite its patent violation of the social ideals of modesty and respect for others, may be, according to University of Pennsylvania sociologist Annette Lareau, PhD, an outgrowth of the hothouse style of parenting that pervades our culture.
Lareau, who has studied the habits and behaviors of contemporary families, calls this practice "concerted cultivation." She thinks it's a way middle-class parents tend to see "parenting as a project," something to be managed and organized and programmed.
That's Quite A 6yr Old
The Gifted 4 Year Old High-Unschooler
"There's a way in which an activity is more intense for the mother than it is even for the child," Lareau told WebMD. "And the competitive nature of activities is woven into the heart of the process."
Psychiatrist Alvin Rosenfeld, MD, believes it's much better to concentrate on the whole child instead of just the part you like. "Many focus on their children's achievements, rather than getting to know their kids as individuals," Rosenfeld explained. "The dilemma is when kids become valued only for their accomplishments -- or when they live up to your fantasies of what they ought to accomplish -- not for who they are as people."
I Cried
“Hey Buddy Hold This Spatula Real Quick”
ONLY eggs, french toast and waffles?? Your kid is a slacker. My 1 year old kid drives to Florida every day to get oranges, which they squeeze fresh orange juice, and my 2 month old drives to Mexico to get avocados for my avocado toast.
Hmmm… lazy. On his 2nd birthday my toddler flew 1st Class to Boston, then took a limo to the Omni Parker House Hotel to pick up TWO of their original Boston Cream Pies, then flew back (sharing one of the pies with the flight crew), and had the good sense to also pick up a chilled bottle of Dom on the ride back home. I didn’t have the heart to scold him on his poor vintage selection (likely due to an aggressive liquor store sales rep taking advantage of yet another 2-year-old who’s flashing a wad of Benjamins) but we had a terrific time making memories and at the end of the day that’s all that matters to any Dad.
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Hahahahaha! As if! If this was actually true then you are a dangerously irresponsible parent for allowing a two year old to be alone and unsupervised at a hot stove!!
I was thinking the exact same thing. I was working in a pub decades ago, mum and dad come in with their little boy, they insisted the boy could get their coffee from the bar and bring it to them. Of course he he was too small to reach properly and he got hot coffee on his hand. The parents were angry with me for burning his hand.
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Um, only two years old and made eggs, French toast and waffles? I don’t think so. My two year old could barely feed the dog, much less me.
How the f**k did she think anyone was gonna belive that? Most two year olds can't even read
Most two-year-olds can't even EAT without spilling half of it! And this person wants us to believe that someone who can't see the top of the stove and who isn't coordinated enough to eat with a fork can cook?
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What deep seeded unfulfilled need does a person have to want to make this, and the others up for the benefit of what others think of them. Most if not all of which they do not even know
My 2 yo also gives me food. OK, mostly beads,strings and whatever glitter she can find mixed with water from the toilet, if I am lucky water from a puddle, but hey, almost the same 😜
And then Gordan Ramsey happened to be walking by , caught a whif of the delicious breakfast made by my 2 year old and immediately offered him a job at his steakhouse in Vegas. The neighbors had all turned out by then to see the commotion and everyone slowly clapped for my prodigal and not in anyway fictional 2 year old michelin star chef child.
That's nothing my son made it to an egg, 9 months before he was even born.
Somehow my son could and the fryer was on it. Luckily I walked back inside, cause I forgot something. It was already on fire.
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Riiigghhhtttt! Everybody knows that no self respecting child does anything nice for their parents until they are at least 30! That being said I wouldn't be so quick to post about how you let your toddler use kitchen appliances unattended.
Unfortunately, the budding little cook never remembers to wash his hands properly, and so, after the best breakfast anybody's ever eaten, the whole family wound up with serious gastrointestinal issues.
Ok why does this person think it's a funny little ( madeup) anecdote like seriously why is a 2 year old even allowed in the kitchen without supervision let alone putting on the cooker ????
A good parent would lose their s**t at their 4 year old using an oven that's on.
This gives me flashbacks to the beginning of The Glass House movie.
and then i woke up to the reality of my mid life crisis and cried then went to my therapist.
Call child services, she actually left a two year old alone in a kitchen, cooking, whilst going back to bed, oh my days, does she have any idea how ridiculous she is.
And then CPS was called because you allowed a toddler, who is lucky to be able to speak simple coherent sentences, use a stove unattended.
So you let a 2 year old play with hot fat, a cooker and a waffle iron?
10 years later Grey gave Gordon Ramsay a bag of money for his restaurants, and took over all of them . Where he made the best pretend backed eggs in the world. And his sister Anatomy became the 1st 4 year old brain surgeon in the world.
18 years later, Grey bought all of Gordon Ramsay's and Jamie Oliver's restaurants,where people would get the best make believe baked eggs in the world. And his sister Anatomy became the 1st 4 year old make believe doctor in the world.
and here my 4.5 year old son make life hell because lego car he made got broken when he threw it on ground
And then you took the kid to the ER for 3rd degree burns. Right.......lying sack of schmidt
I'd expect nothing else of a delusional lie from someone who named their kid "Grey"
Well this is TOTAL BS, and if it ISN'T, then the parents need to be investigated for child neglect, letting a 2 year cook food on a HOT stove.
Translation: I went into the kitchen to find Grey had dumped a whole bag of flour on the floor and broke a dozen eggs.
True...my 3 year old made me breakfast. A cup of coffee made with cold tap water (becauses she was not allowed near appliances), and a slice of dry bread. She sat on the end of the bed watching me enjoy my feast. I nearly choked.
Question: why does this two-year-old have access to the stove and other things in order to make this meal? Now Grant you this was an extremely nice gesture on this young man's part however I don't ain't that he ought to be doing that at his age. It was a very nice. And what he said at the end was very very nice but I worry about two year olds doing stuff like this!
O.K., now I actually did make pancakes when I was 8 years old. But I had helped my mother make them three or four times prior. And, I was a latch-key kid, so I was making my own lunch and occasional dinner (basic sanwiches, heating canned soups or things my mother left with instructions) for a year before that, so I knew my way around the kitchen and stove.
The inspiration for this post might be hidden somewhere in the background... say, just above the toddler's head
1. what kind of freak 2 yr old is that tall, and 2. has any 2 yr old ever been this articulate?
1. he is obviously on a stool or something but even if he is that tall, that doesn't make him a freak. 2. you have a point the first one is the reason for the downvotes
Load More Replies...Parents need to remember to model the behavior they want their kids to develop. "If they see and hear you bragging, that's the behavior they'll emulate," Rosenfeld added.
Social etiquette matters. Don't be a braggart; we don't know about other families' struggles and challenges. The parent you might be tempted to tell about your kid's athletic accomplishments, for example, may have a child with a physical disability.
Again, focus on who your children are as people rather than their latest test score. "We rarely hear the simple praise, 'He is such a good (or good-hearted) kid,'" Rosenfeld said.
In The Womb? Sure
They Would Rly Die
At age 9? In 2021? This is 100% something a kid that age could plausibly say. I get a feeling that the people who object to these don't interact with many children.
Power Ranger Quotes > Bible Verses
Ya know, most people who grow up around people like this end up being hardcore atheists and agnostics
Psychotherapist and author F. Diane Barth said that if you do feel compelled to brag to other parents about your kid, be sure to give them equal time to brag about theirs and try to think of something you admire about their children in case they can’t come up with something.
Every parent wants to tell the world their kid is something special, and they should, but the trick is to balance it out. As you can see from the pictures, there's a line between being incredibly impressed with their accomplishments and talking the kids up to the point everyone thinks you're simply full of it.
Damn, That 2 Year Old Is Genius
Capitalistic Kid
I Don’t Think This Kid Is Even Old Enough To Form Full Sentences
Trump's Twitter
My three-year-old niece said "Ah yes, wonderful news. Thank you for telling me, fine lad. Please, have twenty dollars"
Story Of A Woke Son In The Wilds Of Twitter
Who remembers when people were embarrassed being caught in a lie?
Been Waiting For The Right Place To Post This Enlightened Toddler
An Interesting Title
Hmmm
Well, to be fair, this is actually pretty true. My daughter is not allowed to show any part of her stomach or shoulders at school, but I am allowed to own any number of assault weapons.
Here's One I Might Actually Believe
Airtight Proof Santa Isn’t Real
Socialism Is Now Affecting The Kids!
Folding Ideas Calling Out The Wokest Of Kids
Another Politically Aware 11 Year Old
Now this one could be true lmaoooo TikTok brought down his entire Tulsa rally.
Seems Practical
That is not that uncommon. Two to three languages happens regularly in immigrant families. I grew up with three. Ten languages on the other hand seems pretty hard.
Oh God. I’ve Encountered My First One In The Wild
Yeah I’m Sure Your Kid Gave Up The Chance For Free Candy Based On Some Adult’s Political Views
Look at those absolutely sick Trump trash women. They are an embarrassment to our country. Raising monsters.
R/Wokekids Or R/Thathappened ? Can’t Decide
It Just Sounds Better
Just Found This On Facebook Lmaoooo
Yeah, That’s What An 8 Year Old Is Worrying About
I understand this. It's in the language of a child, but the gist is if you teach in subjects without showing how those subjects are connected, you miss an important learning opportunity. Science contains maths. Geography contains science. History contains social studies (and vice versa). And some of this crossover starts in primary school. I'm not sure I get what he means about music, but the rest of it makes sense. And is absolutely what an 8 year old can worry about.
Poster Claims Their 5th Grader Did This
Believable. Small children are parrots, if they've heard something, especially opinions heavily foisted on them, they'll reproduce on demand. Many antivax parents are scared their child will be secretly vaccinated at every doctor's appointment, so they teach them what they want them to say in this fictional scenario. Sad.
That Kid Loved It
I Used To Be A Woke Kid Myself Back In The Day!
Sure Man
Trump Idiot Nap Area Bad
Unselfish Kid Stops 9/11
Ah yes, and when I asked my niece the same question she said she'd go back and kill the butterfly that caused hurricane Sandy
Mmmm Yes A Wise 3 Year Old
If your three-year old is still using a Binky, you got bigger problems.
The Fact That Whoever Wrote This Sign Reversed The Alphabets To Make It Seem Like The Child Wrote It
Never mind the sign, that poor kid is going to be mercilessly bullied for those extra limbs she has.
Wow What A Free Thinking Family
Lil Worker
How Funny And Relatable
Sure She Did
This Is True I Was The Snack
2 Years Old Is So Amazingly Aware That Leaves You Speechless
Patriotic Kids
From The Mouth Of A First Grader
Yeah, that was a good way to live when there were few people and their hunting had little to no impact on nature as a whole. If everyone who wants to, just goes shooting things now, there won’t be any nature left in a few years.
I'm Sure That's Exactly What She Said
Don't seven year olds read books about farm animals and s**t like that?
Remember Those Embarrassing Things Your Parents Made You Do?
No Not Minecraft
Why?
I don't get it. What's the point and purpose of all this useless tweeting?
Could Be Real, But The Caption Makes It Really Cringy And Less Believable
Why Are They Always 10yo??
Free My Dog Willy
Half A Million Likes
#yanggang
Hmmmmmmm
Nah, this is believable. Unfunny and cringe, but believable.
1st Graders These Days Smh
Here, Honey, Just Hold This Poster And Look Upset
Brave 9 Year Old Draws The Line At 4G
Sure
This comment doesn't belong here. BP has used a lot of Mommy Owl's tweets in the past in their posts. She has posted many of these jokes. They were never meant to be taken seriously. This was disappointing, BP.
This Happens
Your children will be dead soon from a preventable disease. So sad that imbeciles can have children
My Insanely Smart Unvaxxed Kid Should Develop Faster Than Yours
EVERY child and I mean EVERY child progresses at their own rate. Not sitting for very long by themselves at 7 months is not unusual. Some kids walk by 7-8 months and some not until they’re 18 months to 2 years. My daughter had 8 teeth by the time she was 3 months. I thought that was weird. Most don’t get them until almost a year. But it wasn’t weird, just different. All children are different including siblings in their progressions. I did child care for over 25 years and can give you a really good piece of advice……. If you’re concerned don’t ask your friend or a relative ……. ask your doctor. Yep. They will tell you if it’s something to be concerned about based on their knowledge and not experience. Sounds like a whole lot of kids on this post are ready for their Pulitzer! Never worry based on something your friend said. Just cause their child can recite the entire constitution by age 18 months does not make it true. Go with your gut and ask your doctor.
I’m Sure She Did
I Don’t Think This Is Completely Impossible But Still
Why can’t people just state their beliefs without trying to say it’s from their 3-year-old child?
Raising Future R/Iamverysmart Content
This isn't the entire tweet. At the end it says, "it is surprising because they are both cats."
Ah
Communist Child
Sure He Did
Sassy 3yo
6 Year Old Schools His Mom
Wild Imaginary 9yo Attacks
Woke Cereal
Child Is A True Artisté
We Live In A Society
They only had a small amount to use where as Wakanda had much, much more. Your kid is dumb
Big Words
I remember saying I didn't want Christmas presents because I knew my parents couldn't afford it.
This Feminist Kid
Non-Binary 7-Year Old
Yeah, because a seven year old knows they're non-binary when most people take yearssss to figure that out
I’m Not Sure If I Believe This Really Happened Or Not
When my daughter was 5, she slept with her stuffed polar bear so she wouldn't be afraid in the dark. Last year she graduated valedictorian with a full academic scholarship and partial music scholarship to her first choice college. Clearly polar bears are inspiring young children to move mountains. Polar bears for president 2024!
His Son Is A Quote Machine!
I'm sure by now everybody at least on BP knows that Henpecked Hal, Mommy Owl, etc. tweet jokes very often. But still, nice try.
Amazing
Hey, you realize just how much spears cost these days? FIVE STONE WHEELS APEICE! How am I supposed to afford that and pay off the mortgage on my cave at the same time?
(Extra Smart))
Found On My Town’s Facebook Page. Wow
A 6 Year Old
Here sweetheart watch this violent, pornographic, and incest filled show. I'm sure it won't mess you up in any way
We Never Talk Politics
“No Wishes”
Oh Come On
Found This On Instagram And Felt It Belonged Here
Antlers
W A R R I O R C H I L D
Found This In One Of The Comments Of Donald Trumps Tweets. Because You Know A Kid Keeps Up With Politics
Rather you liked Trump or not, it's wrong to teach children to hate people at such a young age.
I'm honestly confused. Some of these are straight-up cringe. But some are obviously exaggerated for comedic effect, or are pointed satires of the trope. And a lot of them are what kids those ages would actually say? Usually because kids believe and repeat stuff from their parents all the time. A lot of comments here are saying "a 6/8/10/11 yr old would never say that; I was playing with dirt crayons at that age". But a lot of the kids I know absolutely would say this stuff. A 5 or 6 year-old writing BLM signs, telling people girls can marry girls, drawing brown faces in the Nativity scene, making to-do lists, making NO BULLYING sign for school, making ILOVEYOUGOD signs... Normal kids say and do these things, especially if they are around adults who talk about it a lot. They may not understand everything, but kids are very vocal and impressionable, and are working to figure out how things work. Or is the cringe factor in bragging about it?
I couple of these interactions could have very well happened, like the few kids in their tween/almost tween years who are more politically aware. It’s a lot more common nowadays to come across kids like that.
My dog is smarter than all of these kids. All she has to do is be cute her whole life and she gets fed, place to sleep and belly rubs. These kids, if they actually exist, are really j for it.
This was painful to read, I really do not know why I didn't stop myself after two or three posts - must be masochism.
Same reason people slow down to look at a car wreck, morbid curiousity.
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Reading this post is a kind of self-harm. I lost many brain cells.
Well I don't mean to brag, but my kid .. My kid is very gifted. She could play keyboard and violin, and composed music from the age of five . Oh wait uhhh.. no.. that was Mozart. .
Wow those 2 year Olds should be working in government. Mine 2 year old will say lalala nonono.
My dogther (get it? Daughter but a dog? Get it?) just came to me and said l "mamá, even though you don't give me table scraps and won't let me destroy the plants or go into the neighbor's apartment play with her cats I wanna say that I'm grateful for the boundaries you set and the lessons you teach me. If it wasn't for them I would have ran into the Christmas tree a lot earlier. Also, let me leave you with this Shakespeare quote I find rather appropriate for the moment: I am "as hungry as the sea." Te amo. I had tears in my eyes and everyone clapped.
i guess these parents wanted attention and tried lying like everyone on social media because social media is the perfect place for lying because you cant see them the only proof that they didnt do is the beliveablity factor.
the only list of BS lies bigger then this is the list of democrat promises.
Not a joke or exaggeration: my cousin was speaking complete sentences at 18 months! At age 4, she spoke three languages fluently (she comes from a multilingual family), and was learning French on top of it. My own children, on the other hand, were delayed in speaking and other things.
I don't remember where I heard the quote. But 95% of this thread remains me of it."It's better to be thought of as a fool; then to open your mouth, and remove all doubt."
To all parents who post stuff on social media about their kids:...nobody cares.
Parents using their children for idiotic posts on social media. Why would anyone condense these for a BP post? The less people see of these, the better off the kids, and society will be
'One can hardly move for beauty and brilliance these days. It seems that there are millions of these one-in-a-millions these days. Specialness seems de rigueur. Above average is average - go figure. Is it is some modern miracle of calculus, That such frequent miracles don't render each one un-miraculous?' Matilda
lmao...conservative brainwashing= child abuse....liberal brainwashing = perfection...so proud...all complete BS
It's *dependent*, and *conservatives'*. Which, as a liberal-progressive, I know. Darn that dependency on government-funded education! ;-P
Load More Replies... I'm honestly confused. Some of these are straight-up cringe. But some are obviously exaggerated for comedic effect, or are pointed satires of the trope. And a lot of them are what kids those ages would actually say? Usually because kids believe and repeat stuff from their parents all the time. A lot of comments here are saying "a 6/8/10/11 yr old would never say that; I was playing with dirt crayons at that age". But a lot of the kids I know absolutely would say this stuff. A 5 or 6 year-old writing BLM signs, telling people girls can marry girls, drawing brown faces in the Nativity scene, making to-do lists, making NO BULLYING sign for school, making ILOVEYOUGOD signs... Normal kids say and do these things, especially if they are around adults who talk about it a lot. They may not understand everything, but kids are very vocal and impressionable, and are working to figure out how things work. Or is the cringe factor in bragging about it?
I couple of these interactions could have very well happened, like the few kids in their tween/almost tween years who are more politically aware. It’s a lot more common nowadays to come across kids like that.
My dog is smarter than all of these kids. All she has to do is be cute her whole life and she gets fed, place to sleep and belly rubs. These kids, if they actually exist, are really j for it.
This was painful to read, I really do not know why I didn't stop myself after two or three posts - must be masochism.
Same reason people slow down to look at a car wreck, morbid curiousity.
Load More Replies... Reading this post is a kind of self-harm. I lost many brain cells.
Well I don't mean to brag, but my kid .. My kid is very gifted. She could play keyboard and violin, and composed music from the age of five . Oh wait uhhh.. no.. that was Mozart. .
Wow those 2 year Olds should be working in government. Mine 2 year old will say lalala nonono.
My dogther (get it? Daughter but a dog? Get it?) just came to me and said l "mamá, even though you don't give me table scraps and won't let me destroy the plants or go into the neighbor's apartment play with her cats I wanna say that I'm grateful for the boundaries you set and the lessons you teach me. If it wasn't for them I would have ran into the Christmas tree a lot earlier. Also, let me leave you with this Shakespeare quote I find rather appropriate for the moment: I am "as hungry as the sea." Te amo. I had tears in my eyes and everyone clapped.
i guess these parents wanted attention and tried lying like everyone on social media because social media is the perfect place for lying because you cant see them the only proof that they didnt do is the beliveablity factor.
the only list of BS lies bigger then this is the list of democrat promises.
Not a joke or exaggeration: my cousin was speaking complete sentences at 18 months! At age 4, she spoke three languages fluently (she comes from a multilingual family), and was learning French on top of it. My own children, on the other hand, were delayed in speaking and other things.
I don't remember where I heard the quote. But 95% of this thread remains me of it."It's better to be thought of as a fool; then to open your mouth, and remove all doubt."
To all parents who post stuff on social media about their kids:...nobody cares.
Parents using their children for idiotic posts on social media. Why would anyone condense these for a BP post? The less people see of these, the better off the kids, and society will be
'One can hardly move for beauty and brilliance these days. It seems that there are millions of these one-in-a-millions these days. Specialness seems de rigueur. Above average is average - go figure. Is it is some modern miracle of calculus, That such frequent miracles don't render each one un-miraculous?' Matilda
lmao...conservative brainwashing= child abuse....liberal brainwashing = perfection...so proud...all complete BS
It's *dependent*, and *conservatives'*. Which, as a liberal-progressive, I know. Darn that dependency on government-funded education! ;-P
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