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Our bodies are incredibly intricate biological machines, and like any complex system, they break down. Sometimes it’s due to our own mistakes, other times it’s just bad luck—but either way, every now and then, they require immediate attention. However, not all trips to the hospital are to be proud of. In fact, we found a bunch of stories online from people sharing the weirdest, dumbest, and most unexpected reasons they ended up in the emergency room. From hilarious clumsiness to the complete inability to read your symptoms, something tells me the nurses and doctors might remember them too.
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#1
Heartburn. But I don't regret that I went. I had been having severe chest pain for a few days, which then became a tightness (due to stress) and rapid heart beat (from panicking) and then my left arm started to tingle (maybe I was sitting funny??). Anxiety attacks can be indistinguishable from a heart attack.
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#2
Had these stomach cramps that had me doubled over for an hour. Get to the ER and actually farted for a full minute. Instant cure.
Bill Swallow 11 hours ago
Sad that you ended up going to the hospital, but on the other hand, we like problems that have simple, easy solutions, instead of turning into major mysteries.
#3
Tripped over a hay bale and fell on a camera in my fanny pack at a renaissance festival and ruptured my spleen.
According to the CDC, the emergency departments in the United States have more than 155.4 million visits each year, or 47.3 visits for every 100 people.
Most of them (43.5 million) are injury-related visits. This includes poisoning and adverse effects.
In total, 11.5 percent of visits result in hospital admission and 2.4 percent end in the person being transferred to a different facility, for example, a psychiatric institution.
#4
A rooster picked my ankle with his spur, spent 4 days in hospital. 12 bags Iv antibiotics plus oral for another couple weeks.
#5
My daughter kept having off and on fevers and throwing up. We took her to the ER. Turns out, she got ecoli. How? By sticking her hand in one of the fish exhibits at the aquarium and licking her fingers clean.
#6
While not to topic, I think my "stupidest reason" for an ER visit has most of you beat:
As I got out of bad a few months ago my neck made a "crack" that was loud enough to wake the Baby. My wife got scared about how loud it was and convinced me to go to the ER.
After a thorough exam and an X-ray, the doctor's opinion? - the bodies of Men in their forties make noises. Sometimes loud.
A complete waste of time - I apologised profusely and left feeling like a moron.
dan gerene 10 hours ago
Try being in your seventies, you don't hear those noises anymore. Or much else.
Interestingly, a 2024 cross-sectional study found that emergency department doctors and patients agree on the urgency level only about 38% to 57% of the time.
The research, by Benjamin Ukert with the Texas A&M University School of Public Health and colleagues at the University of Alabama at Birmingham and the University of South Carolina, was published in JAMA Network Open.
"This is important because nearly 40% of emergency department visits are not medical emergencies, which is very costly financially and in terms of staffing and other hospital resources," Ukert said.
"As a result, state legislatures and health insurers have implemented policies to transfer less-urgent cases to doctors' offices and urgent care centers, but clinicians face profound challenges in making this decision based on what patients tell them about their condition."
#7
Not a doctor but I broke my arm playing golf. I tried to do a Happy Gilmore type swing hit the ground hard and was holding the club wrong, snapped my arm so bad bone was sticking out of the skin. This may or may not have been a alcohol related incident.
#8
Not me, but my daughter, who got hit by a parked car.
The car was not at fault though, my daughter just thought it would be a fun idea to run home from the playground at full speed with closed eyes, to "check if she knew her way blindfolded.".
#9
I recently had to go to the ER. I had been out drinking and I woke up in a daze around 4 in the AM, and tried to drink some water out of my big plastic jug. Only i picked up the plastic jug of laundry detergent and took a big gulp, realized my mistake and spat it out. Since I was still pretty drunk I just fell back asleep but I woke up around 7 and the detergent on my pillow had gotten into my eye. Since I was dealing with the mother of all hangovers I smoked a bowl and passed out again. I woke up 2 hours later, my eye was excruciatingly painful and I could only see a blur out of it. Sinc it was a Sunday, only the ER was open and I had to get my buddy to drive me there. The doc/nurses laughed in my face when I told them what happened. To be fair, I would've laughed if some idiot had drunkenly mistook a luandry detergent jug for their water bottle and nearly blinded themselves. It takes a special kind of stupid to be me sometimes.
Upstaged75 10 hours ago
Wow, that's impressive. A friend of mine (while sober) once grabbed a bottle out of the fridge without turning on the kitchen light. We heard him yell and start spitting so we ran in there. He had taken out a bottle of white vinegar and drunk a big swig of it. 😂 He thought he'd just grabbed a bottle of water.
Ukert said, "State legislatures and health insurers have implemented policies to transfer less-urgent cases to doctors' offices and urgent care centers, but clinicians face profound challenges in making this decision based on what patients tell them about their condition."
This legal process—retrospective review and adjudication—is based on medical claims and algorithms and can be used to decide whether insurance pays for emergency care.
But the study's findings fundamentally challenge this plan design because, if patients and doctors provide different evaluations of the urgency of the condition, then incentives to reduce emergency room visits may not be effective.
#10
I cut myself with an old knife whilst cutting the packaging off of a new knife..
Some Random Person 11 hours ago
I once cut myself with manicure scissors opening the new ones' package
#11
I tripped on the stairs and whacked my shin super hard against the metal edge trim. It swelled up and bruised badly, so I went in.
They couldn’t get an image of the bone because of the gross hematoma in there. They also couldn’t cast me or bind it in any way because of compartment syndrome and stuff. I couldn’t have a boot or a scooter because they’d press on the area. So they gave me a tetanus shot, because I had broken the skin on metal and mine was out of date, and sent me home to heal like a medieval peasant.
Leg up all the time, only up to go to the bathroom and shower, for at least two weeks. I inspected my leg every day and even with minimal gravity, I watched the hematoma break up and discolour everything down to blotches on the bottom of my foot. After two weeks, I went back (strolled on in lol) and they imaged again. They could see where the break was healing, so they sent me home for another week off work (more light duty at home) and that was that.
But yeah. Tripping on the stairs and banging my shin.
Sarah Jay Co 11 hours ago
Ugh stairs are a b*tch. I fell down our very steep stairs a few weeks ago and fractured a few ribs in my back. They can’t do anything for that either so it’s just rest, painkillers and deal with it. So painful and frustrating
#12
Wanted to keep a Barbie shoe safe when I was a kid because I thought it was pretty so I shoved it up my nose.
Upstaged75 10 hours ago
Almost every kid I know has done something like that at some point. With mine it was a baby carrot. And back when I was in Kindergarten my best friend stuck a marble up there. 😂🤷♀️
According to the study, doctors were able to clearly sort 38.5% of ER visits into categories like injuries, real emergencies, minor problems a regular doctor could handle, or mental health/substance issues. That means some visits were urgent and some weren’t. But if you just ask the patients why they came in, only 0.4% of them could clearly sort their visit this way.
And the stories on this list vividly illustrate these figures.
"In sum, we found no association between the reasons patients gave for their visit at the time of arrival at an emergency department, their need for emergency department care, and their final discharge diagnosis," Ukert said.
#13
Attacked by a Christmas tree. Was reaching behind my tree to unplug the lights, somehow managed to dislocate my knee in the process. Paramedics had to fish me out of my Christmas tree which had fallen on top of me. Ho ho ho!
Upstaged75 10 hours ago
I'm sorry for this person, but the image of paramedics have to fish them out of the tree is pretty funny. 😂
#14
Finals night my first semester of college. Pounded a bunch of energy drinks to study, then a bunch of Benadryl cuz I wanted to get some sleep and wake up early to study instead. Thought this is it. Whole body was tingly, my heart was doing flippy-doos, couldn't breathe. Got to the ER and they went, "yeah, you gave yourself a poor-mans speed-ball." Give me a bunch of fluids and they sent me on my way. Still made it to my 10am final across campus.
Surprisingly, never graduated college...
#15
Pinto beans shoved in my ear canal cause I was pretending to be a spy.
Bill Swallow 11 hours ago
Old novelty song - "That's nice, boys, just don't put those beans in your ears, Beans in your ears, Beans in your ears, ..."
#16
Just a few months ago. I was taking some trash out late at night, close to midnight. I thought I heard some cats fighting - they were suddenly making a lot of racket - so using my phone's light, I started walking along the side of my apartment building (which I had never done before) to try and find them. Not even sure what I intended to do - break it up? Shoo them away? I honestly can't even tell you what I was thinking. But whatever, I'm looking closely as I'm walking at the ground, which is a fair bit soft and squishy from a lot of recent rain, and I see something that looks like a set of light grey stepping stones - very helpful, and it makes at least a little sense that some might be in this space next to the building, so I step on one.
Except they weren't stepping stones; they were small utility shafts used by the water company to access the in-ground water shutoff valves for the apartments. The covers of several of the shafts had been removed and were laying a couple of feet away, and the shafts had filled to the very top with opaque muddy water, which is how I'd gotten the impression that they were flat stone. When my leg went down into the one I'd stepped in, the top edge of the metal lining of the shaft gashed the side of my leg open. I had to go to the ER by ambulance and my shorts, sock, and shoe on that leg and the leg itself of course were completely soaked with muddy, bloody water. I dripped a small puddle of it on the waiting room floor. Anyway the moral of the story is, if you're out in the middle of the night and you hear cats fighting somewhere off in the dark, just leave them the hell alone and go inside.
Kenny Kulbiski 6 hours ago
Somewhere there's a couple of cats saying "do you remember that time....?" And laughing their asses off.
#17
Stepped on a 3 ring binder, rings were open, went through the bottom of my foot.
Pulled it out, and it was bleeding a lot so I went to emergency.
Was going to a concert later that evening so I was worried about ER taking to look.
But it was fine, got a tetanus shot and made it to the concert.
Gadaffi Duck 11 hours ago
I did similar as a child. We had wooden slats going up either side of a cupboard (intended for adding more shelves) and I used to shimmy up them to reach the top shelf, well one day one of said slats ripped out the wall and I dropped down on to it nail side up. Went right in to my foot arch. Blood everywhere, mum freaking out, and my 8yr old self just pulls it out, tapes some kitchen roll over it and carry on like it never happened.
#18
I came back from the motocross races with my leg in a full immobilizing splint.
…Because I tripped over a tree root while walking in the paddock.
#19
I was the dumb injury in the ER.
I stepped off the sidewalk wrong and rolled my ankle so bad I tore all four ligaments... Because I was distracted by seeing a really cute puppy.
#20
Morbidly obese guy came in for right lower quadrant pain. I Lifted up his gut and found his lost wallet. Solved two problems.
#21
My mom landed in the ER last Christmas after falling while impersonating Kramer’s entrances in Seinfeld for charades.
#23
I don't work in the ER, but I was stupid and came in for stomach pains. Tried to do a urine test and realized it was my period. In my defense, the pain actually got to the point where I couldn't move the lower half of my body without screaming.
Kim Kermes 9 hours ago
Menstrual pain that serious rates an ER visit, as well as a good GYN follow up.
#24
I broke my toes because I tripped over my dog I laugh at it now but I also get sad because she’s passed on and I miss her.
#25
When I was younger my father saw a fireman's Olympics or something like that, and in one event they scaled the ladder up and then down the other side freestanding without leaning it against anything. Naturally, my father, two of my brothers, and I decided to attempt this. My father got 5 rungs up the ladder, my younger brother 8, and my older brother 10. I was up last, and I had decided that I would not be outdone, I would make it to the top. I ran up that ladder and stepped firmly onto the twelfth rung, but to do so required not holding the ladder. It disappeared from under me and I fell, twisting my ankle and shattering my growth plate. Fun times!
Teresa Thomas 7 hours ago
Not the growth plate!! My sister broke hers when she was about 8 maybe. Possibly a little older. Her left leg is 2" shorter than her right leg to this day. She's in her 20s now.
#26
This one is from my mom who worked as a ER nurse when she was younger.
The hospital she worked in was in a fairly rural area so it wasn't unusual to see farmers or generally older people with little to no understanding of how the modern world worked (rural France of the 80s, yay).
Monday morning, a man in his late 70s arrives, his hand covered with a towel. So, my mom go to take the towel off and his hand under it is almost cut in half, oozing pus. He said he did that with a garden tool.
Now, the stupid begin.
Mom : But, when did you injure yourself exactly?
Old guy : Friday, in the evening. I covered it in tissues and towels all the week-end.
Mom : ... But, why didn't you come earlier?
Him : This place is closed in the week-end. Isn't it?^Isn't^it?
She also once saw a farmer who kept his boots all the time (and I mean ALL THE TIME) and when they took them off to put him in a shower, they found sprouted wheat between his toes. (But that's not stupid, just absolutely disgusting).
#27
In the ER we overheard the paramedics saying someone called 911 to get a ride to the hospital via ambulance for getting shampoo in their eye. Needless to say, the paramedics denied their request (it's a privately owned company so they can.)
Also, a man came in with a folded up umbrella up his rear end.
#28
Guy came in after being concerned the bed sheet had stuck to his lower leg. Turns out hed been using a petrol mower the evening before and it had exploded. Full thickness burn to his calf. No pain. He wanted to go home to feed his cows instead of being transferred to burns and plastics. Man it looked like white leather.
#29
I vomited every 20 minutes for 10 hours. My dad stayed up all night timing them, emptying my bucket, and refilling my water. Went to my PCP in the AM and got a shot. Slept for another like 10 hours. Woke up and was in so much pain I thought my appendix had burst. I was screaming and writhing and my parents rushed me to the ER. $2000 in tests later and they told me nothing is wrong and it’s just my muscles being sore from the extending heaving session. And dehydration. They didn’t even give me anything. Not even an IV.
#30
A few years back I just randomly stopped tolerating food. I think it was summer 2020, not sure. I struggled for a few weeks with rapidly diminishing options for what didn't upset my stomach, eventually hitting a point where all I could eat were hash browns (I did not experiment to see if other iterations of potato were ok, to be honest). And then I couldn't have them, either. After three days without keeping any food down I went to the ER.
They found absolutely nothing wrong with me. Assured me that as long as I could keep liquids down and stay hydrated I would be ok. Within a few weeks I was eating normally again. No clue whatever happened there.
#31
Not a Doctor but a stupid reason I took my 8 month old son in was he had a rash on his forehead and was a little sleepier than usual. Called a Careline and they said to rush him down to ED.
I said- "Are you sure? It's nothing like meningitis, no fever, just rash and a bit tired?"
They said go! Go! Yes!
So I took him and his twin down and were triaged -waited for four hours. No probs, obviously staff are busy and both twins and staff were awesome. My son flirted his head off with everyone who walked past and him and his sister quietly interacted and played.
I was feeling horrible the whole time being there but the nurse on the phone swore he must go straight to ED.
Four hours later, saw a doctor who diagnosed cradle cap of the eyebrows.
I felt like such a time wasting jerk.
Kim Kermes 9 hours ago
Don't. Babies can go downhill faster than an Olympic gold medalist. The sleepier than usual is the symptom that triggered the decision, especially combined with a rash.
#32
I got drunk at my birthday party and wanted to show my sister in law my new lawn mower so we were stumbling down the hill barefoot to my little shed in the dark. It’s raining so I step in some wet runny dog poop and mushy wet leaves and go skating down the hill and up into the air - down onto the dog poop. It is all up and down my feet, legs and hair. I’m screaming, everyone’s laughing, but at least I’m not hurt - I stand up and step directly onto the oldest rustiest nail you’ve ever seen. It goes right through my foot and I know for a fact my tetanus is expired by 2 years. 😂 After a quick shower I get driven to the urgent care for a few shots and some iodine swabs.
#33
I did that thing where I thought there was another step when I got to the top of the stairs. Fell forward, and landed on the contents of my hands, which was broken ceramic floor tiles at the time.
#34
I worked as a registrar in an ER for a few years, not a doctor or nurse. Sorry. But one night a woman came in by ambulance because she was experiencing symptoms of a sinus infection, or maybe it was a minor ear infection-no ruptured eardrums or anything. She told me as I was getting her info that she had already been seen by a physician that day and had already received antibiotics and had taken one dose. She also told me that she would have taken a cab instead of calling an ambulance but she "had spent all her money on the (video lottery) machines". I have no recollection of whether or not she was insured or not, but it was so stupid it hardly matters.
Also saw not one but two grown men come in for splinters. Just your regular run-of-the-mill splinter in the finger. Not infected and fresh. One of those was on Christmas night, when the wait to be seen was 4 hours. They made that guy wait, instead of removing it in triage like the other guy. I think it was petty revenge for wasting everyone's time on such a busy night. He was insured though.
Huddo's sister 5 hours ago
It's funny how some words have completely different meanings in different places. Where I live a registrar is a level of doctor, but I guess in this case just does intake (which makes sense, like registering people).
#35
I was in the ER as a patient next to a guy who was brought in via ambulance because he super glued his eye lids shut.
#36
Chick came in because she was miscarrying. Claims gravida (pregnancies) 27, para (live births) 0. Says that in the last two years since she got on birth control to help regulate her periods, she's had a miscarriage every month. We had to explain to her that she was experiencing regular periods.
Huddo's sister 4 hours ago
How can she understand the need to regulate periods, but then think they are miscarriages? Does she not know how long a regular period is? What made her think she was pregnant when she was on birth control? I'm so confused!
#37
I think I've posted this before - my dad worked in the ER. Had a lady come in one day because her hands were turning blue. She felt fine otherwise, everything seemed normal. Then he realized that she was wearing a blue velour track suit, which turned out to be new. Her hands were turning blue from the dye.
Bonus story - he had a lady come in one night because she hit a tree while snowmobiling. I think she broke an arm or something. He asked how the accident happened and she said she had turned off her headlight so she could look at the stars, while driving a snowmobile through the woods at night.
#38
I fainted in gym class because i didn't eat breakfast that morning. I fell right on my face. Broke my nose.
...Yup.
#39
As an army combat medic I've done a few rotations in base ERs. Best patient I ever had was someone who came in for hurt feelings.
No joke, someone yelled at her for being an idiot and as a result she felt faint, and thought it was ER-worthy.
Meanwhile she was taking up a bed the dude in the waiting room with uncontrollable diarrhea could've used.
#40
I'm a recently graduated RN working as a nurse assistant for the time being. I had a patient last night whose chief complaint was "*when I fart, it takes my breath away.*" One of the better nursing notes I've come across.
#41
Guy calls for an ambulance to go to the hospital because he has excrutiating back pain. We drop him off and while in triage he tells the staff he doesnt have pain, he just knew if he went to the ED they would call him a medicaid (or is it medicare) taxi so he could go to a pharmacy and get his pain med prescription filled.
Huddo's sister 5 hours ago
Sad there isn't another way to do that that doesn't take up an ambulance....
#42
I ate too many gummies and thought I my life was coming to an end. I couldn’t walk without major difficulty, I couldn’t talk because I was slurring so badly, my whole body was shaking, and my heart was pounding. I went to my room with every intention of just going to bed but I had this revelation that dogs know when people are going to go. So I told my dog if I’m not suriviving then sit. And he sat down!! Of course my fears were then confirmed. I called 911 and went to the ER.
Yeah made the mistake of telling my family about this and it’s like their favorite story ever. They literally tell it at parties 😂😂
Edit: sorry for the confusion guys!! I meant edibles!! I usually just call them gummies….
#43
I was depressed and wasn’t refilling the Britta to have water to drink. I also wasn’t eating because of the depression. I ended up with a UTI, dehydration, kidney infection, and walking pneumonia. I was weak and couldn’t stand up without fainting. I nearly went into sepisis.
Kim Kermes 9 hours ago
Glad you're better. Untreated depression can be deadly in more ways than s*******m.
#44
Got a tampon stuck and genuinely thought I was gonna be gone or something s**t. 14 year old logic is somethin else entirely.
Kim Kermes 9 hours ago
Septic shock from leaving a tampon in too long can be fatal. Glad you were attended to.
#45
This was a few years ago, I purchased new earphones (notice I said ear not head, they fit inside the ear) I put them in, and could not get them out again.
I rushed myself where I was, to ER, and waited in the waiting room, slowly losing my hearing in my ears, until I was admitted, they yanked it out, didn't cost me anything.
#46
Got into poison ivy, oak, and sumac. My arm was swollen 3x it's size and was leaking a worrisome amount. I uses gauss but if leaked through about every hour. I also had a bad cough that turned out to be a secondary infection in my lungs.
Second would be to get a blood mole removed. I would itch it open in my sleep and bleed everywhere.
#47
Guy was camping with his frat buddies and they were firing air rifles at each other with a baseball glove on.
The pellet was lodged well into his hand. Like, how did you think this was going to end?
Daisydaisy 6 hours ago
Sorry but I am just finding it hilarious how many of these idiot stories are boys! Bless them!
#49
Dude came in really worried about this bump on his face. Turns out to be a pimple. Of course, he was also schizophrenic and off his meds, so there's that.
#50
My aunt is a nurse this is her story
Two extremely drunk men came in
One of them fell down the stairs and somehow he got glass in his eye
they pulled out the glass and sealed the gash in his eye
With superglue
They had to soak his eye in acetone to get it open.
#51
Dropping an enormous can of pineapple juice on my toe. I was pregnant at the time so maybe my freak out was unnecessary but it really really hurt…a lot.
Tyranamar Suess 8 hours ago
If you can't see your toes it's hard to judge how bad the injury is.
#52
My own dog got too enthusiastic and “bit me” on the face.
I say “bit me” because really she just thrashed her open mouth too close to my face while barking at another dog and it was like getting hit by a steak knife.
#53
My favorite I ever saw was “uncontrollable hiccuping.” I mean, the man was like, 93. I’d probably have a coronary if I had the hiccups too long, but it still made me chuckle.
Also, “right index finger pain.” I just can’t see how that’s worth a trip to the ER.
#54
To get their daughter’s ears pierced.
#55
I was shadowing in the ER once and this big white lady came in with this massive bruise around her lower stomach area. The doc asked what happened and she responded "my horse kicked me" and I just bit my lip and turned around to force myself to not immediately bust out laughing.
What do you think ?
Samantha H 2 minutes ago
(Ex EMT) I once went to call where a Woman had a huge swelling on her forehead, looked really nasty. She had gone Bowling and the Ball got stuck on her extremely long nails and she ended up smacking herself. I was called to a Nursery for a Child with a tiny Paper cut! the Mother was hysterical and insisted that we take him to the hospital and asked me if I thought he would need Plastic Surgery!
Samantha H 2 minutes ago
(Ex EMT) I once went to call where a Woman had a huge swelling on her forehead, looked really nasty. She had gone Bowling and the Ball got stuck on her extremely long nails and she ended up smacking herself. I was called to a Nursery for a Child with a tiny Paper cut! the Mother was hysterical and insisted that we take him to the hospital and asked me if I thought he would need Plastic Surgery!
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