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30 Men Share The Lies They Tell Their Girlfriends And Wives, And The Reason Is Surprisingly Sweet
They say honesty is the best policy. Is it always the case, though?
One Redditor decided to put that to the test by asking men to share the lies they tell their girlfriends and wives. But instead of shocking confessions or betrayals, the responses revealed something far more heartwarming. These so-called “lies” turned out to be small, everyday gestures of love, kindness, and support.
Scroll down to see some of the most wholesome ones!
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#1
*I would fight a bear for you...*
I absolutely would not - I would run like a b***h. The problem is that my wife was a sprinter and is in better shape than me so I would definitely end up having to fight the bear anyway.
RELATED:
#3
My wife is Deaf, and uses lip reading and sign lenguaje.(we are mexicans so here is the LSM, equivalent to the ASL).
I'm always trying to pause my speech, gesticulate more, etc; and put attention to what is happening and translate to her (I'm clumsy trying to gain skills in SL).
She asks sometimes if I feel overwhelmed or burdened by the effort it requires, and without skipping a beat always say that not at all.
But it's hard and burdening.
Sometimes it overwhelmed me or made me tired as hell, and feeling hopeless or lacking interest in sharing something, just because the effort it takes.
But, if its like that to me, how frickin excruciatingly difficult could be to her!. And she keeps trying and putting effort into bonding and sharing thoughs, feelings, moments whit me.
So I will keep lying and trying better.
#4
I am going to get flak for this one, but I will agree she looks like she's lost weight. (When she asks specifically.)
Here's the thing for me... I like her body the best *now*. All the weight she's put on since we've been together has gone to the best places - belly, a*s, and boobs - and she's hotter than ever to me. I literally can't keep my hands off her. I have to force myself to not constantly make it about s*x when I'm in her presence because every time I catch a glimpse I'm like a teenage boy again.
But I understand telling her that would be like telling a man, "Your size is perfect - the big ones hurt!" It might be the truth for me, but it's not what she wants to hear. And since she's been watching her diet and going to the gym, I do my best to encourage her since being healthier is good, and I am in fact very proud of her for her discipline and how far she's come - she lifts heavier, runs farther, and has quit smoking. All her huge accomplishments have made her more attractive overall, no matter what number is on the scale.
My god, though, that thicc body has me completely dumb. I'd be fine if she never lost another pound.
#5
Once a year, I take a secret PTO day to do all my holiday gift shopping for her. She is intensely smart so I spend this day "pretending" to go to work as normal, but really make the rounds to shops and Marketplace pickups.
When she asks how work was, I lie and tell her it was a lot. It's the only sneaking I do in our relationship and it honestly feels bad but is so worth it to get a big surprise on her (something otherwise unattainable).
#6
That she's the cutest thing in the entire world.
I have eyes, I've seen Moodeng.
#7
That I will love her until the day I die.
That s**t is immortal. It's not going to stop just because I'm dead.
Celtic Pirate Queen 9 months ago
I'm 62 and my husband is 66. I started falling apart at 50, when my warranty expired. He always write me a litter for birthdays and Christmas. My birthday letter this year included the line, "I fell in love with you and I will fall apart with you".
#8
No matter what, I'll always tell her dinner was delicious. Just because it's how I was brought up. Just the appreciation of her cooking for me, is all I need. I don't care how it tastes. 99% of the time, it's absolutely fine anyways.
Skara Brae 9 months ago
TIL there are white bell peppers. https://www.reimerseeds.com/white-cloud-pepper-seeds
#9
I compliment her painted nails.
I couldn't give a f**k but she cares about it so I do my part.
Boredandsomea 9 months ago
no person that is not into painting nails cares about nails and its not for the "men", it´s a thing mostly for the persons self esteem and for the person with the beautifully done nails to feel good and get appreciation from other people in the loop. when that said..... it is a nice way of showing that you care about the human to compliment on something they care about
#11
I understand. Even if I don't and don't really know what she is talking about, she needs to vent, and when I say I understand, she can move on.
#12
That the dog and I didn't have our evening treats yet!
#13
I’ve been telling my wife she looks 20 for 25 years.
Just last week she was talking about how her face looks “different” now and I told her the same and then immediately made a correction “okay fine, you actually look 25 now.”
She knows it’s a lie and always respond “yeah right” with a little smile on her face. She likes to hear it even though she knows I’m just saying it.
#14
When my partner eats my food after saying she's not hungry or doesn't want anything. I always tell her "that's why I got the fries because I know you'd eat them". But in reality, I wanted those fries.
#15
She's 8 months pregnant and she snores like a lunberjack. No honey ofcourse its not the reason i havent slept all week.
Warren Peece 9 months ago
Why not have separate bedrooms? My grandparents (mother's parents) had separate bedrooms because my grandfather was a D-Day veteran who had PTSD nightmares. They still managed to have six children. You do know you can visit, right?
#16
That we need to leave at 9 to be there on time.
In truth, we need to leave at 10. But if I tell her that, we won't be leaving until 11.
#17
I learned long ago that when the wife asks if her hair / outfit / nails / new purse / whatever looks nice, the correct answer 100% of the time with no exceptions is "Yes." I don't care if she's rocking a Mr. T mohawk, while wearing floppy red rubber clown shoes and a burlap potato sack as a skirt, carrying a dead raccoon as a purse, and her nails are painted with White Out. The answer is "yes." If she squirts ketchup and mustard on her face and calls it makeup, the answer is "yes." If she goes full Howie Mandel and stretches a latex glove over her head, the answer is "yes.".
#18
That the hedgehogs we rescued and took to the rescue centre this week are alive and doing well.
#19
"Nah, I don't want it, you go ahead.".
#20
'I'll be careful."
I will court death.
Weltschmerz 9 months ago (edited)
This one made me laugh!! I read the latter half in something like Geralts voice ha ha
#21
My wife is way smarter than me, I don’t even try anymore.
#22
I'm my wife's longest running sub on her twitch channel. 5 years of paid subs and I can't stand twitch. I just like supporting her.
#23
That I have already 'decided' on where to go for lunch/dinner whatever. "Guess where we are going?"
"Umm [place she wants to eat]"
"Yep!"
Problem solved. No more of...
"Hey babe what do you want to have for dinner. What do you want to eat, where do you want to go?"
"No but I don't like that. Oh I CHANGED MY MIND. Oh are you sure?".
Thorsten Massow 9 months ago
Don't tell her, just ask her. If it is OK for you, agree. And if you really don't like her choice, You still can try to negotiate something suitable for both of you.
#24
I found and removed the spider you saw in the bathroom.
Still Going 9 months ago
My daughter was afraid of spiders when she was young. Once, she called me to her bedroom because there was a "huge" spider in the closet. For the life of me, I couldn't find it; so I picked up a bit of carpet lint (new carpets, ugh), squished it into the napkin I'd brought, and said, "Got it!" Showed her the wadded napkin with something dark inside, and she was a little happy camper.
#25
The lawn is too wet to mow.
#26
I told her 30 mins ago that I’m just walking the dog
Currently sat in pub with the dog.
#27
I "might" be getting off early to do some stuff on Valentine's Day. We usually don't do anything big, but I got a bug up my butt and took a half day without telling her. I'm going to decorate our dining area and bring home one of her favorite meals.
Other than that, nothing jumps out.
Child of the Stars 9 months ago
The only acceptable reason to lie to an SO is for a surprise like this!
#28
"What are you thinking about?"
"Oh, nothing."
Nah, not nothing. Instead, my mind is going down some stupid rabbit hole... such as how much power could I actually get for free if I built a copper coil and put it close to the power line? How could I regulate the voltage to 120 volts?
Or maybe what would happen if everyone ACTUALLY stopped using Facebook?
Or how could I totally reverse engineer a washing machine timer? I've read the wiring diagrams many times but never actually understood them.
#30
That I love her. It's not that I don't love her. It's that what I feel is so much more than love. Words can't describe it. She means so much more to me than just love. So until I figure out how to communicate the abundance of feelings for her, the word Love will just have to do. Worth noting we've been together coming up on 15 years. .
#31
I tell her whatever she cooks is amazing everytime. It's usually good, sometimes ok, and once in a while it's a complete fail. The important thing is she cooked for me. She doesn't have to cook for me, she has her own full time job and other stuff to take care of. When she does cook for me though i'm gonna eat atleast a plateful and be damn grateful for it cause noone else is cooking for me. It's not about how it tastes, it's about the time and effort put into an act of kindness.
Judy Reynolds 9 months ago
You are truly a treasure!! I have been planning and cooking meals forever, and I am so tired of it.
#32
"Of course I got the ice cream for you!"
😞
#33
Each brand new fishing rod and reel is a nice old one my dad was keeping in the back of his garage for me until now.
#34
When women ask us what we’re thinking, most of the time we have to make something up. Women don’t seem to like the answer “nothing”. Most of the time that’s exactly what we’re thinking.
Daniel Atkins 9 months ago
Sometimes we are thing of something stupid Like who would win in a fight between Shrek and Wreck it Ralph. No we don't want to explain why we are thinking that.
#36
I pretended to forget it was Valentine’s Day today. I have flowers, candy and a card ready. Reservations to a nice restaurant next week too (we both agreed we do not want to fight the crowds tonight or this weekend).
Judy Reynolds 9 months ago
Once knew a couple who celebrated Ground Hog Day, and ignored Valentines Day. The flower shop was never busy. The restaurants weren't crowded. They could easily get a sitter for the kids.
#37
I do not lie to my wife, been married for 24 years. I married her at 21 she was 20. lying is a sure way to get divorced. It's also disrespectful to your spouse.
#38
That I'm going to take a *quick* shower. In reality I want to absorb as much of the hot water as I physically can; the rest of the house is too damn cold and the only time I feel warm is in the shower.
#40
I’ll probably get downvoted for this but I always try to be truthful. Don’t really see what lying gets anyone, you walk away feeling crappy about yourself for lying to the person you love and ultimately hurt them and yourself in the end. It’s a lose lose.
MojoIn Atlnta 9 months ago
And not the point of these posts - yours must say something like “don’t worry no one cares about the instructions”.
#44
Not a man but my boyfriend constantly tells me he's just about to leave work when I know for a fact he's still playing League of Legends with his buddies. The game score tracker website doesn't lie, honey.
#45
That the contractor only stole $50,000 from us before he ran.
He stole $67,000 from us, and I then had to max out 2 credit cards, 2 lowes cards, and take out a $20,000 business line of credit, to have to do the repairs myself.
I honestly hope Maro Mohan from Ocean Blue Builders gets rectal love from an escaped gorilla, with no lube, and gets an aggressively angry handjob from it.
#46
That each of my 11 guitars are only worth a few hundred dollars.
Gavin Johnson 9 months ago
When I die do not sell my vinyl / decks / amps / speakers / bikes / guitars / drum kit / kayaks / books / cameras / other random items (delete as applicable) for what I said they cost. Get them valued by a professional and PS I’m sorry 😂
#47
A round of golf takes 8 hours.
#48
That pan needs to soak.
1LittleGranny64 2 months ago
Wow, when I read that one out loud my husband just started laughing.
#49
That its not a problem.
Mainly this is in relation to how long it takes her to get ready to leave the house. Not a particularly vain or image obsessed woman who spends ages doing make up, preening, etc. She just has ADHD and is easily distracted and poorly planned out as far as leaving the house is concerned. I'll be ready in a couple of minutes with bag and camera packed, keys, phone, wallet and headphones in pockets etc. She'll do laps of the house flitting from one thing to the next, slowly getting to the point where she's in a position to leave. Even then it's not assured that she'll have everything with her.
It can also apply to things like large chunks of the house being dominated by her latest focus of interest. It's currently gardening so various bits of the house look like a potting shed.
It is very much a problem. I often feel like large swathes of my life are wasted, sat on hold waiting for her to get her s**t together. If I delay getting ready though, she'll get huffy that I'm not doing what it takes to leave the house.
Fortunately its one of only a few character flaws that I have to endure and they are more than made up for by her other, better qualities. Life would be far worse and far emptier without her and her willingness to put up with my own individual b******t.
I'm not beyond those subtle nudges, tweaks and quiet interventions that will haste things along but, as anyone else who lives with an ADHDer will know, there is only so far you can go. You only get so many "WE MUST LEAVE RIGHT NOW" or "FIX THIS S**T NOW" cards per year and it would unwise to play them all too soon.
Love is compromise and compromise is love.
Huddo's sister 9 months ago (edited)
Wish my stepdad felt that way. He can get pretty rude about my mum not being ready on time, even though he sits on his computer for an hour or two every morning before thinking about anything else, whether they have to go out early or not. She wouldn't have as many random things to do around the house while also getting dressed etc if he gave her a hand or showed any intuition. Things like feeding the animals that have to be done every day.
#50
You're way hotter than your sister. But, I think she knows, because she doesn't have a sister. It's just something I say when she becomes self-conscious.
Polly Fukuhara 9 months ago
I always tell my brother that he is my most favorite brother, ever. He is the only one.
#51
We are in fact not sure we would still love her if she was a worm. .
#52
I'm probably too honnest she knows f*****g everything even how pathetic I can be at times lol.
#55
I’m single now but one lie I told my ex fiancée that I will continue telling my future SOs:
I sleep more comfortable sharing a bed than I do having my own bed.
I don’t. I sleep SO MUCH BETTER having my own bed but I can still get a full night’s sleep sharing a bed so I will never have the balls to admit that lmao.
LakotaWolf (she/her) 9 months ago
Sleep deprivation for either partner is NOT good and will lead to health problems and resentment. Don't make this the hill you die on. Sleep separately if you need to, and your relationship will actually be BETTER for it.
#56
If I said I'm going to do it now, I'm going to do it now. You don't have to remind me every single week...
#57
I'm fine.
#60
Of course I wanna rub your back or feet when I’m trying to play my game.
#62
‘You are the smartest, prettiest, cutest, smartest, funniest, fastest, athletic, strongest, mature, sweetest, talented girl I know’
Bro I’m not the -est of everything either, but if I chose you, it means you are absolutely the one for me and I love you anyway and try to be the -est of many things.
#64
Oh, I love the new humorous socks/shirts/ties and I'll be sure to wear them to work. That oversized rayon Star Wars button-up will surely impress.
#65
"No, your friend isn't hot. There are no other attractive women in the world. Every day, I'm shocked at how doctors and scientists haven't tried to run experiments on you to figure out what it is that makes you and you alone attractive. I suspected I might be gay for the longest time when, in reality, it was just that I had never known there were any physically attractive women in the world until I met you. Every time my eyes glaze over another woman, I feel disgusted and nauseous, and the only thing that helps is thinking of you. This is completely normal and in no way indicative of any underlying issues of security you might have.".
#66
That motorways in the UK are numbered sequentially. The m25 was the 25th motorway built in the UK.
#67
Hopefully this will be buried..
She always tells me she loves me and I say I know and say it back to her.
I know she doesn't. But that's not a conversation she is ready to have..
#68
I did not put onions in this dish. They are definitely not cut really small so you don't notice them.
Huddo's sister 9 months ago
This is a bad lie. Never lie about food, whatever the reason the other person says they can't have it. Otherwise they are either going to get sick or feel uncomfortable (whether because of taste, texture or digestion issues), and will know they can't trust you.
What do you think ?
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 9 months ago
Am I the only woman reading through these wishing they'd just tell the blinking truth? I'd far rather hear "yes, learning sign language is difficult sometimes, but I'll do it because I love you" or "thanks for cooking, I really appreciate it, but maybe next time try it with a bit less garlic" etc etc. That honesty makes me feel I'm being valued and treated like an equal human and not merely being humoured.
LB 9 months ago
Some of them are cute but yeah, I much prefer honesty. It makes me feel more safe.
Load More Replies...
Lost Panda 9 months ago
"I'm not tired, so I'll do chore XYZ, you go lay down and rest." In fact... I'm on the verge of passing out, but you rest first.
Nina 9 months ago (edited)
It's sad people think these are kind - what would be better is just being open and honest and loving. As a girl, I think I'd like to know if hubby was doing a kind gesture or skiving off or needing a break by going to the pub - that's how relationships work. It shows each half what we both need so we can adapt. Hubby and I don't lie to each other, that's far too much effort. If i need out cos the kids are pissing me off, I tell him so he can take them and I can bugger off. If he wants to stay out late gaming with his mates, he tells me so I'll do bedtime and not bother to make dinner for two. If he's snoring and I can't sleep, i tell him so that i don't stab him. If I'm being overbearing, he tells me he needs space and he will take off for awhile. If he wants time to go and buy me a gift for something, i feel really loved and get super excited for the whole time that he's out. What's the point of a surprise when i can feel adored like that? That's how marriage works. We've been 15 years married now, 20 years together.
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 9 months ago
Am I the only woman reading through these wishing they'd just tell the blinking truth? I'd far rather hear "yes, learning sign language is difficult sometimes, but I'll do it because I love you" or "thanks for cooking, I really appreciate it, but maybe next time try it with a bit less garlic" etc etc. That honesty makes me feel I'm being valued and treated like an equal human and not merely being humoured.
LB 9 months ago
Some of them are cute but yeah, I much prefer honesty. It makes me feel more safe.
Load More Replies... Lost Panda 9 months ago
"I'm not tired, so I'll do chore XYZ, you go lay down and rest." In fact... I'm on the verge of passing out, but you rest first.
Nina 9 months ago (edited)
It's sad people think these are kind - what would be better is just being open and honest and loving. As a girl, I think I'd like to know if hubby was doing a kind gesture or skiving off or needing a break by going to the pub - that's how relationships work. It shows each half what we both need so we can adapt. Hubby and I don't lie to each other, that's far too much effort. If i need out cos the kids are pissing me off, I tell him so he can take them and I can bugger off. If he wants to stay out late gaming with his mates, he tells me so I'll do bedtime and not bother to make dinner for two. If he's snoring and I can't sleep, i tell him so that i don't stab him. If I'm being overbearing, he tells me he needs space and he will take off for awhile. If he wants time to go and buy me a gift for something, i feel really loved and get super excited for the whole time that he's out. What's the point of a surprise when i can feel adored like that? That's how marriage works. We've been 15 years married now, 20 years together.
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