Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
then open in external browser
and click "Open in External Browser" 
It's not you, it's me. A classic break-up cliche, but what if the same logic applied even before you were in a relationship. Dating is hard, and when asking why you are single it can be cathartic to think, perhaps the problem is not me it's them. But if we are being honest with ourselves maybe we do know why we haven't found "the one." Well, Jimmy Fallon of the Tonight Show has given his viewers a chance to air their dating failures on Twitter. The hashtag is called #WhyImSingle and it has caught on like wildfire. Whether you have too many pet peeves, keep meeting jerks, or haven't met someone that matches your special brand of weird, somebody out there can relate. Check out this short list of "Why I'm Single" tweets featured on the Tonight Show and don't forget to upvote your favs!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
tarebear 7 years ago
The very first time my bf came over to my house he sat on the edge of the bed and my car walked up to him and screamed at him. I proceeded to tell him he needed to scoot over because he was in the cat's spot. He moved, Simba jumped up and yelled at him again then laid down... that is what made him fall in love with Simba and we have now been together almost 11 years....so maybe this guy just wasn't meant for her or her cat!!
layne 7 years ago
My that's one clever, protective & very proprietary cat! Haa-ha! Luckily you & Simba's relationship charmed him too. Cheers to 11 yrs!
Load More Replies... Bored Fox 7 years ago
I have a friend who lives with 2 cats so every time I visit him I feel quilty because I sit or sleep on the favourite places of the cats. For example he has 2 chairs in his kitchen. When he is in a kitchen one of the cats is always sitting on the other chair. So if he has a visitor there is not a chair for the cats. And the cats do not like that. :)
Rebecca Cote 6 years ago
To be fair, I'm one of those cat mom's where if my cat is sitting in the spot I was, I'll move to a different one as opposed to moving her.
Felicia Dale 7 years ago
The right guy would have said, "Oh, I'm sorry. Where would you like me to sit?" Seriously. Why not?
RELATED:
#2
Aaron Kara 7 years ago
Ahhh yes, the starfish. My girlfriends presumed sleeping position, the only difference is her arm frequently tries to suffocating me and her foot is wedged firmly in my giblets...
Robert Morson 7 years ago
I read that as "like I'm f**king a star fish" and was confused for a few seconds.
Kururi.Orihara 7 years ago
Am I the only existing person who has the whole bed to myself, but just curls up in ine corner because it's more comfy?
Christina Sersif 7 years ago
My grandparents who celebrated 60 years of marriage before my grandmother passed a few years ago slept in separate rooms. My grandma couldn't handle my grandpa talking in his sleep and he couldn't handle her snoring.
Janice Seagraves 7 years ago
When I first married my husband, he slept like a starfish too. I was literally rolled into a ball between his arm and leg. We have a queen sized bed now and he stays on his side.
diane a 7 years ago
every relationship i have ever had - the guy sleeps on the WRONG side of the bed
diane a 7 years ago
he;s supposed to sleep on the RIGHT side - i just need to sleep on the side nearest the door
Load More Replies... #3
Felicia Dale 7 years ago
See, I LIKE this. I'd say right away, "Where should we go eat?" I don't want to eat food in a restaurant that has more than a passing acquaintance with health codes!
#4
Yvonne Bernal 7 years ago
This could have turned into a "conversation starter" had he laughed and explained himself. She may have found it (and him) appealing!
Martina Třešková 7 years ago
Lol, things like that happen to me often ;) I would have understood.
SykesDaMan 7 years ago
It might be worse than what you think, she could have heard 'You're A problem!" :D
#5
Lola 7 years ago
Hahaha I thought that was a normal thing to do. Before I went on my first date with my now lovely boyfriend, I looked him up and someone with the same name (name is very unique by the way) had a sex offender record in Florida (we live in Connecticut). Me on the first date, “have you ever lived in Florida?”. He laughed and said, “you looked me up didn’t you? By the way i know what you’re talking about, and if you looked closely, that other guy is much younger and he has a different middle name. So no, it’s not me.” Boy was I embarrassed! But we’re still together years later :).
#6
Felicia Dale 7 years ago
Find someone who watches the same kinds of shows you do. There. Now you're not single and you have more fun watching Netflix.
Master Markus 7 years ago
Disagree as Netflix in Canada pretty much never has what I want to watch.
#7
Felicia Dale 7 years ago
Okay. I would likely respond with the Gilligan's Island theme song or one of the longer, more obscure sea shanties.
#8
Christina Sersif 7 years ago
I thought that was cute. If he didn't laugh you're the real winner.
Felicia Dale 7 years ago
LOL! I have it on record from my partner of thirty-plus years that he took one look at my Mom and thought, YAY! :D
Shull GaRett 7 years ago
That is not all that bad... It would be worse if she was a guy and said that to a girl xD
#9
Nina S 7 years ago
One girls creepy is another girls romantic (think Twilight) and stay positive! She's out there :)
J.B. Launer 7 years ago
Why do none of the "stay positive" comments ever come from guys?
Load More Replies...
#10
Hamlets twin 7 years ago
One girl I dated was on the short side, well at least compared to me. One day, before our date she tripped over her dog and hit her face on the coffee table giving her a glorious black eye. She still wanted to go out so we went to go see a movie then grab a bite to eat. I couldn't even make it to the theater until I asked her if we could just watch something at her or my place. EVERY single person was giving me death stares and a couple of dudes "accidentally" bumped into me.
Louise Brigance 7 years ago
LOL...I'd have to think about that one before I'd share it. There's too many people out there that would just admit it sounded just like me.
#11
Dinetk 7 years ago
Did this once with an armpit because I had a doctersappointment Just the side where my shoulder hurt He asked me to lift both arms..
Master Markus 7 years ago
I don't get why women shave their legs or armpits. I know girls who don't and nobody makes a fuss.
happyhippie 7 years ago
Just because you don't see it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Go look at literally any photo on the interwebs of a woman with arm or leg hair. Then look at the comments. Basically 99% of them will be guys calling that woman disgusting, saying she's a man, etc... My best friend decided to quit shaving. she got harassed on the beach by a group of guys. It's just strange. I can't imagine caring about someone else's body hair.
Load More Replies...
Dave Roger 7 years ago
Real men don't care. Little boys who think hairless women in porn are the norm do care. See: Craig.
Load More Replies...
Christina Sersif 7 years ago
Pretty sure that's not why you're single. A lot of women do this or not shave at all unless the pants are coming off.
#12
Sherrie Glendening 7 years ago
That's when you say "okay, hun. I'll get the food and meet you over there.'
Load More Replies... tarebear 7 years ago
Why not just hold your phone to your ear? That seems way easier than faking someone else is in the car where they can clearly see it's only you??
KT Trondsen 7 years ago
uhmmm....does this not totally fail when you drive up and you're alone??
pau garcia altamirano 7 years ago
You can pretend that you're talking to someone on the phone too.
Paige Loewen 7 years ago
Or you could say quietly, “What do you want?” to the fake person next to you and order ‘for them.’
#13
DaBoiestBoi 7 years ago
Very many stores have the radio on and it was probably on the radio
Load More Replies...
Wendy Lorimer 7 years ago
I still push myself on to the trolley, lift my feet then go fleeing down the aisle in middle-aged abandon.
Martina Třešková 7 years ago
That's not a reason to be single. I find geeks very hot, for example.
#14
Master Markus 7 years ago
Yeah, it's way too over-bearing. It's especially annoying if they have that double-standard of having to protect their daughter but their son can do whatever. Just teach your kids regardless of gender to have some independence and self-respect!
Load More Replies...
birdhouse 7 years ago
As a father of 3 daughters, threats aren't needed. Teach your daughter how she should be treated. Show them by respecting your wife. Then trust them to set the limits with the stupid boys.
Craig Lee 7 years ago
It goes both ways. Guys deserve the same respect. This entire culture the world seems to be in that wants equality at the cost of making sure one sex needs to be on a pedestal is creating a divide. No wonder fewer people are getting married and having children, people are raising their kids to think the world should treat them like it revolves around them. None of us are the center of the galaxy and the world isn't always fair. You get what you give. If people are required to be respected, then they better be offering that same respect in return. Otherwise, they're going to push all the good people away and be left with the same people that they have become.
Load More Replies...
Stille20 7 years ago
This attitude frustrates me to no end. You raise your kids to be responsible empowered adults. They guy should show your daughter respect because he is a decent human and she insists on being treated with respect, not because he was threatened with some creepy cliche.
Craig Lee 7 years ago
How about he should respect her because he's a decent human being and she offers respect in return...! It goes both ways, he deserves to be treated well in return.
Load More Replies... Master Markus 7 years ago
And the reason I'm single is that my response to that would be "Mmm, you gonna keep that promise?" (Likely as a joke, but I find that a fair amount of people can't tell when I'm joking or not.)
#15
Bored Fox 7 years ago
I have met many pet owners who admit that they sometimes eat pet food because it tastes OK. Or adults who eat baby food because it tastes good and is easy and quick snack.
Miss Cris 7 years ago
A friend of mine wore some dog food with toasts to an informal dinner and, even after he told that it was a joke and that it was paté for humans, nobody dared to eat it.
Load More Replies...
Randomcthulu 7 years ago
My brother and I used to try all of the dog treats before we gave them to the dogs, the green Alpo bones are vile and I understand why dogs hate them
Gryffindor Grace 7 years ago
i ate my cat's wet food once, and he just stared at me like "REALLY?"
Christina Sersif 7 years ago
One of my best friends who is absolutely narcotic about her dog will make homemade treats and always makes me try one. Dog biscuits for the most part taste like sugar cookies made by a diabetic who had to cut out the sugar. That's the best way I can explain it.
Rebecca Cote 6 years ago
My husbands cousin made dog treats in a cake pan, but also made human treats in another cake pan and left the both out on the counter... he didn't tell us they were dog treats, we ate some lol. They weren't bad, just bland.
Flora Right 6 years ago
My pupper eats rice and veggies,so yeah,not gonna stop myself from eating greens
Rachel Nelsen-Callahan 7 years ago
I cook with baby food and make dog biscuits for my dogs 🤣 and they taste yummy lol
Felicia Dale 7 years ago
If you're feeding your pets human quality food instead of pet "feed" (yes, there's a HUGE difference in the ick factor) then you're golden.
Karen Ballou 7 years ago
My late husband was a kennel master in the US Army. They and the handlers were required to taste the dog food every time a new bag was opened.
Shull GaRett 7 years ago
My frends mom left some biscuits on the table in a bowl. We were playing games and he thought we could use a snack. They were harder then expected so we had milk with those.Then his mom came and asked what happened to the doggy biscuits she left in the kitchen.... That explained why dog was looking at us in "this" way
#16
Diane DesAutels 7 years ago
I did something like that when saying goodbye to a teacher who called to wish me well in the hospital. I liked her, but we weren't THAT close! I guess I was still a bit drugged.
Todd Chesser 7 years ago
I finished a phone conversation with my boss with, "Take care, love you!"...I sat for five minutes after hanging up, wondering if I should call him back and try to explain.
#17
Daria B 7 years ago
Don't worry, my husband has been wearing same shirts too in the last couple of years. And nobody seems to find it weird. Also, cheaper this way.
chaoskind ds 7 years ago
Right, like we are anyway too obsessed with clothing, makeup..stuff, also black can never be wrong :-)
Load More Replies...
boredkoala 7 years ago
Um, why would anyone force a metalhead change their wardrobe? Try dating in kind!
Martina Třešková 7 years ago
Nothing wrong with black. As a minimalist, I would cringe, though, because why keep fifty same t-shirts? :D
snoozy womble 7 years ago
My husband has shirts nearly as old as me, all in black obviously. He has a shirt that looked like it had escaped from Robert Smith's wardrobe, washed so many times it has faded to grey. It is mine now, it is pretty comfortable tbh.
#18
ieniemienieme 7 years ago
i ate snacks before going on my first dinner date with my now husband.. i didn't want him to think i eat alot.. he knows the truth now
Master Markus 7 years ago
I think that's "fine" if a little immature, but you shouldn't do it on a date where you're GOING TO EAT FOOD!
#19
Sherrie Glendening 7 years ago
I can so relate to this. My answer to every every question on Facebook is...Chris Hemsworth!
#20
Bunzilla 7 years ago
I flip mine onto its side so I can eat them from the bottom up... Save all that icing for last :)
Master Markus 7 years ago
Just... eat it like a normal person. You get the same amount of icing. Personally I won't eat cake icing that's come off the cake, because it needs to be balanced out by the texture and flavour.
CATMONSTER2018 4 years ago
I know its kinda weird to reply to a post from like 2 years ago... but there has been no new posts over the last 3 days... I must say... i dont flip it over put the base is my fav part of pie
Load More Replies...
Kendra Miller 7 years ago
If it's cake I eat it bottom up (best for last), but if it's a cupcake, I rip the bottom off and make a sandwich :)
Sherrie Glendening 7 years ago
I have to admit that I've been known to lick my bowl after I've had ice cream, especially after mint chocolate chip.
Add New Image
What do you think ?
Sherrie Glendening 7 years ago
I don't see anything so weird in these posts. Actually, these are the types of behaviors that will get a laugh when you remember. Everybody has something just a little quirky about them.
ruby jackson 7 years ago
Thanks. That certainly helps! I look forward to reading your lovely blog. Cheers! https://www.united-airlinesreservations.com
Michèle Gyselinck 7 years ago
I was bullied by my dad, who was verbally abusive, while gowing up and decided as a young adult that I'd rather live alone than be in an abusive relationship. Then around age 28 I developed schizophrenia with auditory hallucinations (hearing voices) depression and insomnia to name only those symptoms, and they took me off the market for the next two or three decades. So here I am at 59 still single.
Destiny Rose 7 years ago
For me, it's because I'm waiting for the right person and guys I have dated don't want to wait, so they leave.
Sherrie Glendening 7 years ago
I don't see anything so weird in these posts. Actually, these are the types of behaviors that will get a laugh when you remember. Everybody has something just a little quirky about them.
ruby jackson 7 years ago
Thanks. That certainly helps! I look forward to reading your lovely blog. Cheers! https://www.united-airlinesreservations.com
Michèle Gyselinck 7 years ago
I was bullied by my dad, who was verbally abusive, while gowing up and decided as a young adult that I'd rather live alone than be in an abusive relationship. Then around age 28 I developed schizophrenia with auditory hallucinations (hearing voices) depression and insomnia to name only those symptoms, and they took me off the market for the next two or three decades. So here I am at 59 still single.
Destiny Rose 7 years ago
For me, it's because I'm waiting for the right person and guys I have dated don't want to wait, so they leave.
You May Like 30 Of The Funniest Tinder Profiles (Yes, They’re Real) 41 "Nice Girls" That Got A Reality Check Online For Their Delusional Behavior (New Pics)
Akvile Petraityte 🇺🇦
Justinas Keturka
Related on Bored Panda
