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A day without memes is a day without humor these days... combine it with a subject such as science and you might think you'd get a mediocre combination at best. I mean, how funny can memes based on chemistry (unless you are a fan of Breaking Bad) or physics even be? Well, don't be too fast to judge, Pandas, as you might be in for a surprise.

#1

Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

Gunter Simon Report

TheGoodBoi
Community Member
Premium
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe the world can learn from this. Broken beak, broken leg, missing arm, missing leg…troubled mind. Everyone needs help and it only takes One to make a difference. Be That One everyone!

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troufaki13
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even crows have more integrity than some people

Sergy Yeltsen
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"Even crows have more integrity than most people." Fixed that for ya.

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Full Name
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She broke her beak in a car crash? How fast was she driving?!?

Ken Beattie
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Not fast but the air bag failed to deploy :P

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CHRIS DOMRES
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Time to 3D print a new beak for her.

VioletHunter
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Absolutely! As lovely as it is that her partner takes care of her, when he dies, she'll starve to death.

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Raelene Christie
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I've seen this on several platforms and it is beautiful, crows and other corvids are known to do this. Quite a few species of birds do this too. If look at most animals they do protect and care for I'll and infirm partners. Unlike quite a few humans who put people with disabilities in a class of people who have no intellect or abilities and should be hidden.

Muff_Fluff
Community Member
2 years ago

This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

See, I love them because you can use them to make money, but to each their own!!

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Silre
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Crows are better than humans

‍RandomCrow(she/her)‍🇺🇦
Community Member
2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Could I ask how that happened? Sory if that was rude or anything I'm fine if you'd rather not answer either

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RELATED:
    #2

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Nahtan Roschwalb Report

    Steph
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is fantastic! I must remember this one! 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As is wife I would constrain the heck out of him for describing my supervision like that!

    Tee Rat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Smacking the side of the TV used to help with reception, constrain to your hearts desire.

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    Tracy Wallick
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I need to hire this guy to help me write my next eval/resume

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That sentence is a work of art, tbh.

    Andy Frobig
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Should have thrown in "on time and under budget"

    Pascal’s Swagger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you take a resume writing workshop this is what they teach you

    IYAAYAS64
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My son is a scientist and this is the kinda s**t he says

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    #3

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Valentin Dombrovsky , twitter.com Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They didn’t laugh because the joke made them drool instead 🐶

    Steph
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Best reply - from both of you! 👍🏻

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    Mat Hall
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The fact that when someone says "Pavlov" you immediately think of "bells" or "dogs" is perhaps the most succinct example of Pavlovian conditioning that one could hope to find.

    cerinamroth
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I asked the librarian for a book on Pavlov and Schroedinger. She said: It rings a bell but I'm not sure if it's here or not.

    Jinx (she/her)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    f**k Pavlov, he was a monster for what he did to those poor puppies

    Nikole
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “First, Ivan Pavlov would sever a dog's esophagus and sew the loose ends to its throat, leaving a pair of adjacent holes that connected, by separate passages, to its mouth and stomach. Then he'd slice through the dog's abdomen, carve a hole in the wall of its stomach, and stitch open another permanent wound.” Can we please stop talking about this piece of s**t?

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pavlov's dogs. Was an experiment on conditioned reflex (ring bell, dogs salivate). Unlike his cats (ring bell, cat f****d off)

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    Key Lime
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The mill I worked at had the noon whistle, which was also the call for the ERT if there was an incident. My boss heard the whistle one day for the ERT but just assumed it was noon and ate his lunch.

    martymcmatrix
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If Pavlov was from Spain, would his name have been »Pablo«?

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    Bored Panda recently interviewed Roger Harris, the person behind the famous Facebook group 'Science Humor.' With a twinkle in his eye and a meme always at the ready, Roger not only possesses expertise in the field of science but also excels at managing one of the largest groups on the social platform.

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    When asked about the challenges faced while moderating a group of such magnitude, Harris told us, "Ah, challenges, there've been many. Just the other day, someone tried to share a meme about Schrödinger's cat that was neither here nor there. But jokes aside, moderating a group this size is like conducting a rather large and chaotic experiment. The trickiest bit is balancing free expression with maintaining decorum. Thankfully, with a set of strict rules and a spot of British resilience, we've managed quite alright."

    #4

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Loner , twitter.com Report

    sbj
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Also 'something not quite right' or 'it'll be fine'

    Alex Bailey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Actually far more British than innit - which is mainly cockney (primarily the East End) and that's not the whole of London, let alone Britain.

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    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We already have "Wos Gaain On". It's set in London and features a distinctive map of London in the title sequence. ;-)

    Will Cable
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Then add local dialects and you get titles like "Well bugger me"

    Dill
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Quite! Innit is rather cockney and a very small part of Britain!!

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    Harlan Sarvis
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    omg. that's the type of joke my dad would make lol

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    #5

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Joel Novatne , twitter.com Report

    Monday
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If I was queen of the globe I'd stick them all into 1 streaming service. If you want to watch it for free you have to sit through 1-3 ads (depending on length) at the start of each episode and nowhere else. If you pay for premium there will be no ads beyond "hey this show is new, maybe you want to check it out" on your homepage. Vote for me in the upcoming monarch of the world elections! Taking suggestions from potential cabinet advisors!

    Anya Beboop
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They would absolutely hate you but the common consumer would salute you. Moving towards reigning in corpos is the right direction!

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    clbruss
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And what about the problem of evening scenes being so dark you cannot even tell what is on the TV? Is there a fix for this?

    Bender Bending Rodríguez
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am just replying here in hope someone will give you a fix for this, which I can steal. Because every evening/night scenes are so dark I can't even tell if TV is on anymore.

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    DadManBlues
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I especially hate those movies where the convos are undestandable at level 40/50, but the sound FXs are breaking my windows at 10/50.

    Queen Bee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Huge problem for me ..... get blown out of my chair when the music starts,

    marianne eliza
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You know you have a problem when the "background" music is louder than the speaking.

    Kathy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, same is true of radio stations that sandwich loud pop or rock music in between commentary or news bulletins; the music is so loud that you are forced to turn the volume way down, only to completely miss out on the next piece of commentary because the volume is now turned down so low that you can't hear a word they are saying! So then you turn the volume up to hear that news bulletin you were tuning in for, only to have your eardrums perforated seconds later by a blast of music so loud that you think you've just died and gone to hell! Surely it should be possible to find a happy medium between completely deafening and unintelligible murmurs!

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    AJZombieJag
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Put all of the streaming services in a room and lock the door. it's getting tiresome to subscribe to so many various streaming services. Just give us a few or ideally one! Not every production company or organization needs to have their own streaming service!

    CJ Kelly
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But that's how they get the most money out of the programs they own 🤷🏽‍♀️

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    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And stop putting those annoying ads across the bottom of the screen DURING the show!! ESPECIALLY if they're covering subtitles!!! I was watching Dark Winds and one of those blocked the subtitles from the Diné!!!

    Cricketgeeklol
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This should happen! It's a little jig,volume up, volume down, volume up, volume down 🙄

    down quark
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want to design a system that could be hooked up to a TV or anything with volume really; you would set your preferred volume, maybe with an example sign so you aren’t just guessing, and it will dynamically adjust the volume so that you don’t have to turn it down every time music or ads twice as loud as the rest of the movie come on. It could also temporarily enable captions when talking is quieter or hard to understand.

    Krod Mandoon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    and how the fast forward/rewind stuff works!

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    The unique balance of humor and education is evident in the moderator's approach. When diving into the essence of integrating humor with science, he stated, "I've always believed that a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, and in this case, a good joke can make even the most complex scientific theory digestible. If our memes and jokes spark a moment of curiosity or even better, a Google search, then I believe we're on the right path to promoting science in the most delightful way possible."

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    #6

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Gerardo Calderón Sandoval , www.tumblr.com Report

    Tucker Cahooter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I bet they were worried initially whether it was a pirate ship or not

    Fee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or time slip. Whoa dude we went back to the 1800s.

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    Mistiekim
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Great, not only is my boat broken but now you’ve made it feel underdressed

    Mimi La Souris
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    my first thought :) imagine if they are superticious, the fear to see this glorious ship coming for their soul.... :D

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    Daniela Lavanza
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The most classy rescue team ever!

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Best rescue f*****g ever is what I'd call it.

    Bienlunée
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Time travelling ghost pirate ship

    Nick (He/Him)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ive been on a similar ship, those things are equipped with radar and motors. still looks very old tho.

    Just another idiot
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No need to fret, Captain Sparrow is here to help.

    Sergio Bicerra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "This is the day you will always remember you were rescu..! SPLAHS! Into the water.

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    BC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is bloody awesome.

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    #7

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Sean D. Klapperich , twitter.com Report

    Andy Frobig
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Etymology is a funny word, I wonder where it came from

    OnlyMe
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Confusing them with etiology makes me sick

    Mike_The_Nike (He They)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i get it but you would be SHOCKED by the nimber of people that get vegetarian and vegan mixed up

    me McG
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Edamame is delicious with a bit of salt and a slab of butter.

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    #8

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Ace Wong-Two Report

    Just another idiot
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    LOL the first time I read your comment I read it as "Sharon is watching" and couldn't figure out who she was and why she's watching.

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    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Flat earthers are all around the globe, you know. Their own website said so.

    Carole G.
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nope..cats would've knocked everything off, just say'in.

    Emperor Maximus
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Average city in Ohio. (I know this is not a funny joke, I'll see myself out.)

    No_idea
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wish I was a flat earther

    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is stupid. The Statue of Liberty is in the opposite direction of Mount Doom.

    Harlan Sarvis
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even Sauron is watching how stupid the flat earth's are. Galaxy brain meme playing in background.

    Mistiekim
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That journey to Mordor really would have been much easier for Frodo if we had a flat middle earth.

    Christina Collins
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I guess if the world was flat, there would be such a place as Middle Earth.

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    However, Roger's journey doesn't end here. As for the future of 'Science Humor,' he shared his aspirations, saying, "While 'Science Humor' has been a rollicking adventure, there's always the thought of where to next. Perhaps a 'Science Humor' YouTube channel? Or maybe a podcast? Though, I must confess, I'm partial to the idea of a book. 'Science Humor: A Decade of Memes & Enlightenment'. What do you reckon?"

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    #9

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Gerardo Calderón Sandoval , twitter.com Report

    Corvus
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Now imagine, if countries started listening to climate scientists...

    Ace
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Unfortunately there is not such a simple solution. Even 'carbon neutral' schemes can still produce loads of CO2, they just offset it using 'carbon credits' to pump money into carbon reduction projects, many of which are not trusted by some people, including some scientists, to actually work in the long term to reduce CO2 emissions.

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    Francis
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    funny how we stop talking about a problem when we solve the problem (:

    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Every disaster movie starts with morons ignoring scientists.

    Jennifer Ness
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Remember how Y2K wasn't a disaster? Yep... and I also remember when hordes of programmers were hired to fix all the old COBOL and Fortran code so computer systems would function on 1/1/2000.

    Id row
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's when global intelligence was still trending up. Since then, it's flattened and is currently trending down. Especially in the US.

    Mario Strada
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Matt Walsh and the Matt Walsheses of the world are idiots.

    SoapMonkey76
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Matt Walsh is clearly as thick as mince.

    Sergio Bicerra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love this post, gives a little hope about climate change

    Jennifer Ness
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's too late. The point is that unlike the 80s, people now are anti-intellectual and don't believe the scientists or they're rich folks who understand and don't want their profits to suffer so they feed the anti-intellectualism.

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    kansasmagic
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, this is absolutely true - conservatives use the fact that regulations on CFCs *worked* as supposed "proof" that the regulations weren't necessary to.begin with. Reduction of CFCs and the chemical pollutants that caused acid rain are both environmental success stories.

    Tee Rat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I remember as a kid the pothole at the foot of our driveway had my dad complaining about the mayor for months until one day it was magically filled in and we never heard another word about it.

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    #10

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Devon Galley , twitter.com Report

    Fee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Praying Mantis females eat the males after mating.

    Smiley MG
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So for them its "Pray, Bang, Get eaten"

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    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, if any of them want to live forever, they know what not to do.

    pineapple87
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You forgot to mention how they die, which is by ejaculating so forcefully, their penises tear off their bodies ans and stay inside the female.

    pineapple87
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Whoever decided to name drones after male bees clearly had no clue how useless drones are. They can't even f*****g feed themselves, they have to be fed by the worker bees. They only exist to mate, with a queen that cannot be from their own hive, because incest. And then they die from an exploding penis.

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    Cloakred_Is_Bored
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bee one: bro I got to second base! Bee two: *sniff* Oh s**t! Bee one: f*****g dies

    Shaun Coleman
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ...and that is different from humans how?

    Sastry T.V.S
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They die after their raison-de -etre is over

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    #11

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Artan Koka Report

    Katie Lutesinger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Am I the only person who thinks that's a really stupid looking car?

    Jrog
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If we go by Apple's track record, you would have to flip the car to access the recharge port.

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    Nikole
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Right?? Seems like everyone was focused on the car and missed the goldmine.

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    Orange Tabby
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like a computer mouse that'll run out of battery every 2 days.

    Holy Shimmering Sheeps541t
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So, if you need to replace anything on it will the spare parts be filtered through an offshore company to justify massively overcharging? Like a $5 windscreen will cost you $300?

    Sem Kix
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The windows are bought sepperatly

    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And installing Windows will hurt performance for no damned reason.

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    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Apple had windows before Microsoft did.

    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Of course, Xerox had 'em first.

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    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It looks like a Iphone with wheels. Not very creative.

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    A core principle of group founder's management style lies in fostering diversity and inclusivity. Elaborating on this idea, Harris remarked, "Science, much like humor, is a universal language. We've always aimed to ensure the 'Science Humor' group is as diverse as a Petri dish teeming with bacteria! Our mission is to represent every corner of the globe and every facet of science. After all, as they say, variety is the spice of life, and in our case, the formula for the best kind of humor."

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    #12

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Petros Miskos , twitter.com Report

    ShriSha Kamboj
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i had to read it twice to understand

    martin734
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why grammar, punctuation and sentence construction are important.

    Chintan Shah
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It took me a minute. The headline reads as though the new species at the bottom of the sea are using robots and we have only just discovered this!

    Tee Rat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew Sea Monkeys were more than brine shrimp.

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    this made me giggle-snort

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Namor the Submariner, Aquaman, & all the other Atlanteans,

    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All these sunken ships are just so much source material I guess.

    Ruth Kelly
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah, yes, I'm happy to realize that the robots found the numerous new species, NOT THE OTHER WAY AROUND! :)

    Lisa Graham
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imagine when they start using AI.

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    #13

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Mohammed Jihad Bawati Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tip: replace the grapefruit with a flavorless amino acid water beverage and watch even more stubborn joy melt from your body in places you didn’t even know you were storing it!

    Monday
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I dunno...I'll take flavourless over grapefruit any day. But that's just me and my weird taste buds.

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    Daria
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But grapefruit is so yummy!

    Blue Bunny of Happiness
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If I eat grapefruit my joyless life might be shorter. Heart meds that say do not eat grapefruit on them…

    Terry Tobias
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Alot of meds say that. I've been on antidepressants where I wasn't supposed to eat grapefruit.

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    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But grapefruits are tasty and chips suck. I never like the first bite, then the glutamate kicks in and I reach for more for no other reason than my dumb ape brain being tricked into it. It's not even tasty.

    tuzdayschild
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm on cholesterol meds that actually make the chips healthier for me.

    Chintan Shah
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Be careful because grapefruit interacts with a common cholesterol medicine called atorvastatin.

    Molly Whuppie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love grapefruit quite a lot but given a choice Im going with the chips.

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    #14

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Laura Anne Seabrook Report

    Tähtikarhu (he/him) 🇫🇮
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh damn, i was in the process of launching someone into the Sun! All that wasted effort!

    Andy Frobig
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Scrub the mission and recalculate, there's still time

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    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well if you were really mad at them you don't want to risk them coming back I suppose.

    54 s
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't tell me how to supervillain.

    Steve
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So they can return with alien super weapons like in Star Trek 1? Have we learned nothing from Vger?

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you wait long enough the sun is going to come to us.

    Alison Welles
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd settle for Antarctica. No wait - those poor penguins would have to deal

    Chris Virg
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But it would be so much more satisfying to have them burn up in the Sun.

    Ruth Harper
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sure, but sending them into the sun would be so much more satisfying.

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    #15

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Himanshu Gupta Report

    Tucker Cahooter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She should market it as "PH 7" and make a fortune

    Sina Tallio
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Holy *S**T*!!! I gotta get on that, don't know why it didn't occur to me already 😃

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    troufaki13
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Then she lights her vagina-scent candles and thinks about other ways to sell b******t to people

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Some people would buy her farts if she claimed them as magnetically healing 🤷‍♀️

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To be fair, some people would buy her farts if she sold them. People are effing weird.

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    CatWoman1014
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Same woman who has bone broth everyday or lunch and a midafternoon IV to make up for the nutrients she refuses to eat

    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lemon is an acid, so according to my high school chemistry:- acid + alkili = salt a water. So she is drinking salty water

    OneHappyPuppy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then university chemistry tells you that citrus fruits actually become alkaline when they reach your stomach soo *shrugs*

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    Queen Bee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So true! The billions spent on such stuff could feed the starving............

    H Nunya
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ph balancing is such BS. The second it enters your stomach it’s going to become one with the tub of Ph 7.35 fluid that is already there and will make absolutely no difference. And if you were somehow able to make a difference, you’d die because your body needs your stomach fluids to stay at Ph 7.35

    Thatkamloopsguy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Alkaline water is a major joke. If you're buying it, you're a moron.

    Mickipickie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I assumed the spritz of lemon was in her hair to keep it blonde

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    #16

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Kristin Stewart Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Theres practically infinite amount more cheese you aren’t eating!

    SheHulk
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Very Douglas Adams!

    vennyp0o
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've dreamed for years of buying my own wheel of parmesan.

    Holy Shimmering Sheeps541t
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Given that God is infinite, and that the universe is also infinite... would you like a toasted teacake?" - Talkie the Toaster

    Jeffrey Diehl
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun. Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-two million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea.” Douglas Adams

    DrZanz
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the reference frame is our galaxy, the earth is frighteningly small. If the galaxy was the size of the USA, earth would be just about visible under a strong microscope.

    Lindy Mac
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I feel SO MUCH BETTER about my cheese consumption after reading this.

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    #17

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Gunter Simon Report

    Bryn
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But not a pointy tooth ):

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    Ash Conner
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Damn right. This is the best dental add ever!!

    Johnnynatfan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    wow that is true, I didnt even notice his missing brow

    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But are his eyebrow and tooth missing him?

    Bored Birgit
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So - if you lose an eyebrow, let the dentist extract a tooth and nobody will notice. 😁

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not really a point, I don't know anybody who smiles like they're about to eat a baguette in a single go.

    DrZanz
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Doesn't matter how factual it is, it's good marketing.

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    54 s
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did notice his smile first. Not the missing tooth, the smile. He looks super happy. Unlike the dead-eyed forced-smile people surrounding him.

    iBlank
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    poor guy has had a tough week

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    #18

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Stuart Ciske , twitter.com Report

    Harp Seal
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    fr like you get a house free of rent, a nice patch of sunlight no other competition with plants or weeds, good water and soil BUT OF COURSE, U HAVE TO BE UNGRATEFUL AND DIE BECAUSE LIFE IS JUST TOO HARD

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That "house" is too small though. They'd get unlimited soil in nature vs the tiny pots we cram them in.

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    Vic
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ..and bites.. don't forget the leaf bites..

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    marcelo D.
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    plants in nature are the fittest plant for the environment, all the rest died. house plants are the plant someone bought and put there.

    Dalilah DeLarge
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I'm allergic to tap water" - my Calathea. RIP you ungrateful drama queen

    Sue User
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thats because tap water may have too much chlorine. You can smell the chlorine at my moms house. Let the tap water sit for 24 hours or use filter.

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    Bad Alchemy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not related: Now that Twitter has "rebranded" as X, does anyone else find themselves trying to click the X out of habit?

    Mike Soigne
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, and it's f**king annoying, too. @ Elon Musk Is An Idiot's Version Of A Smart Person, a FB group

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    Frank Ropen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Dandelion: F**k yeah, concrete

    Daniela Lavanza
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, plants do die outside for many reasons (not enough water, eaten by animals, competition with other plants, diseases...). It's just that you're far less likely to notice like you would with your favorite plant in your dining room.

    Krista Zobel
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Me and my black thumb managed to kill cactus plants, somehow. I had to give away my remaining plants in the hope that they live on, away from my terrible gardening "skills"

    Mike Soigne
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cactus 🌵 aren't meant to be indoors. Cactus need to be in the ground, or in pots much larger than themselves. Their "tap root" is for anchoring themselves into the ground, and they put out a finer network of roots near the surface. Don't water right at the base of any cactus -- that almost always leads to root rot, and once the tap root is rotten, it spreads inside the cactus. Cactus looks fine, but it's already dead or dying. A house is just TOO COOL for almost all varieties of cacti. Most are dormant during the winter and shouldn't be watered. Cactus should be replanted or repotted in mid-March and mid-October. When transplanting, use "cactus mix" soil. "Palm mix" if cactus mix isn't available. DO NOT WATER AFTER TRANSPLANTING. Wait at least 2 - 3 weeks after transplanting or potting to water. Most cactus naturally prefer "poor soil" conditions, but a use a cactus fertilizer that's high in nitrogen. Fertilize every 6 weeks beginning April 1st thru October 1st. Good luck from Arizona

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    Cory Kent
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've seen it written: Plant outside: Hey look I think there's a light in this new break in the pavement I can sneak out of. I'm gonna take this on a grow like wild. Plant inside: Omg I need water...okay not that much water. It's so dark... no that's way too bright you're gonna burn me alive. Wait, where did you move me I can't grow here. I need trimming I'm getting too lanky...no not that leaf, not that side actually, no that's too much. Never mind I give up.

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    #19

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Daniel R. Chapman Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Give that guide a raise!

    hearditontheX
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And I've had two shots of vodka b4 I had lunch. Take advantage of an empty stomach

    Jane W.
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's Sue at the Chicago Museum .

    Alison Welles
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Indeed! I have met her. But as a lady, she declined to give her age...

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    hearditontheX
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Am I math illiterate or is this person 6 No matter what c**p I get back I say hahahahaha

    ThePalm52
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honesty IS the best policy.

    TheTruthPhD
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The "dinosaur bones" aren't even real in the first place. All those brown boned dinosaurs in museums are all a fraud. Ask them when you go and they will tell you they are fabricated.

    Dragons Exist
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, because bones are so rare that there are no full dino skeletons.

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    View more comments
    #20

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Mohammed Jihad Bawati , twitter.com Report

    STress (I/me)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So, does it mean, when you make such a pic, and you send it to someone, that you're actually mooning them?

    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Put the toilet paper rolls on breakfast meat. Moon over my hammy.

    David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My life must be pretty boring because now I sort of want to try this.

    Mario Strada
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poke some pinholes here and there and make stars.

    James016
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Moon and Me, The Adult Years

    SkekVi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    smear coldcream all over your face and then do this and REALLY be The Moon /MightyBoosh

    Danny Eglen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    *sings* Neil Armstrong, he walking on me face! Buzz Aldrin, he walking on my face! The other man, he walking on my face! I'm da moon!

    Harlan Sarvis
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I see, MEMES... *EPIC SOUNDTRACK STARTS PLAYING*

    Cactuar Jon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When you are the moon, the best form you can be is a full moon. And then the half moon... he's all right. But the full moon is the famous moon. And then three-quarters, eh, no one gives a sh*t about him. When does he come, two days in, to the calendar month? He's useless. Full moon. The moon. The main moon.

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    #21

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Kristin Stewart Report

    Rob(erta) Roy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My brother and I do this thing on roller coasters, on the way up a hill, we say boring over and over in a British accent, and then scream when we go down the hill. Idk why, we just do

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    Phil Boswell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My uncle used to fly Phantoms with the RAF, and I think he flew Tornados as well; he was on Vulcans for a while but I don't think they pull so much g-force. I have experienced something very much like the above picture going round a roller-coaster in the Netherlands while he called off the g-numbers at each twist and turn, it was epic ❣

    Fake Name
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like, weeee, or whatever.

    Janelle (jellybean/nellie)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even the guy lower right is like "meh... Ive seen better"

    Mr.Li
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Guys....I'm on vacation here and you bring me back to work!

    Ga Di
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    until he realises that maintenance was done last year and there is no ejection seat..

    cerinamroth
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or a French chef who has lost his huile d'olive

    Palo Sulek
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Guy bottom right - guilty excitement

    Griffy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just another day at the office.

    View more comments
    #22

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Kevin Finan Report

    daniel sullivan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nothing new under the sun *autosuggest tried to say “under the sink”

    Load More Replies...
    Bols
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For sure "nobody wants to work anymore" must have been there somewhere

    Tobias Vollmann
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is cuneiform tablet found in Kültepe, the ancient city of Kanesh. It tracks the income and expenses generated by caravan shipments. Source: https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/325851

    troufaki13
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm glad to see that we are consistent 😑

    Sergio Bicerra
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can't fool me, that's a cookie.

    tom
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Without cookie, I'm just a monster -CM

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    Mimi La Souris
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "it was better before" was better before :D

    nm
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The text above the tablet is a hoax. https://quoteinvestigator.com/2012/10/22/world-end/?amp=1

    Maggie Fulton
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I suspected as much. Write a book on cuneiform tablets?

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    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At least writing a book back then was a commitment, now any idiot can influence with a curation of ill conceived videos… imagine if everyone had to handcraft their own electronics in order to post their thirst traps and misogyny!

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yup, back then misogynists still had to put in some real work!

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    Littlemiss
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh for god sake who found my diary and read it?

    View more comments
    #23

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Vu Nguyen Report

    Ricardo Ferreira
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Basically it's a MLM - Multi Level Mummy business model

    Lyyyy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In high school my physics class visited a small electricity museum. The person that was in charge of it said to us: ”I’m 40, have a degree in archaeology, and all I can get is basically a summer job here. Jurassic park was a lie.”

    C scanlan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know a guy who I call a professional student. I knew I choose poorly by working

    Tiddlez
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is like the fourth time I've seen this meme on BP

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The last, living dynasty of ancient Egypt: Egyptology professors teaching future Egyptology professors

    Christina Collins
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like I said..... expensive piece of paper that does nothing for you.

    Suede
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If only I had read this 30 years ago... 😭

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    #24

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Gunter Simon Report

    N G
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've seen this so many time. They must be serial bowls

    Ben
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Break the window on the right and save the bowls.

    Jeremy James
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was thinking that, if the cabinet isn't mounted to the wall, you could pull it out and gently lay it on its back.

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    Markus Weiler
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's why Schrödinger put the cat in the box, after she "arranged" THIS!

    troufaki13
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Schrodinger would be very proud! 😊

    Russell Tilling
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Open the door an inch and slide a blanket in bit by bit!

    PowellSkier
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want to know the outcome of this! We're they able to save the dishes? How many broke?

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    #25

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Dhirendra Bist Report

    Ty Stratton-Quirk
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Psh, I can see that at least once a month without having to make a cup of coffee. I think my cat may have issues...

    TotallyNOTaFox
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Is this burning an eternal flame?" - Atomic Kitten (s**t I'm old XD)

    Book Nerd (she/her)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It’s the card game, Exploding Kittens!!

    My O My
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seems like sth a cat would do

    Odin Schmidt
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So it's a cat using the litter box.

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    #26

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Maurice Achach Report

    Harp Seal
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In natural selection we trust

    IDK_Something
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The dolly doesn't have the support to walk with that the buggy does.

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    ShriSha Kamboj
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    maybe he dint want the new wheels to get dirty

    Sherry Marie Golden
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or he needed the stability the shopping cart offered.

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    Mint Sauce
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And maybe he didn't want to put something with dirty wheels in the boot of his car......

    Thinhenien
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My first thought is that he has trouble walking and needs to hold onto the cart. Dollies roll faster than a cart so he might lose his balance if he just pushes the dolly

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I literally did this a few years ago. I got funny looks while wheeling just the dolly around, but I wanted a couple paint brushes, a tin of paint and some other odds and ends. So using a trolley made perfect sense.

    Matt Mich
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    maybe it's a gift. I got one once as a gift

    Petra Schaap
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    so pleased to read that so many Pandas stood up for this guy :-) my first thought was "the wheels are sealed, not moving, or something"

    Raymond Core
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He doesn't want to get the tires dirty in the parking lot.

    Francine Oglethorpe
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I always hate when people are posted on the Internet without permission.....I support all the comments about wheels getting dirty or him needing the carriage....love that support

    Alyssa Phillips
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Last time I bought a dolly, the wheels were zip tied. It made it very awkward.

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    #27

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Erin Go Brawl-Her Report

    Bibmibap
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Prof would say octopuses;)

    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Such an animal could play various instruments at once. Then it would have rocked opus.

    Steve Hall
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    While “octopi” has become popular in modern usage, it's wrong. Octopi is the oldest plural form of octopus, coming from the belief that Latin origins should have Latin endings. However, octopus is not a simple Latin word, but a Latinized form of the Greek word októpus.

    Jacqui Dunn
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why am I finding this whole exchange so hilarious? I guess because it is.....

    Maggie Fulton
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mocktopus. This is a word the world needs.

    C scanlan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a friend who thought being a marine biologist meant you had to join the marines

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    #28

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Superb Sandy Report

    ThéveNinja (she/her)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Saving this. This applies to everything.

    Steph
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Best thing I‘ve read in a long time! ❤️👍🏻❤️

    William Hayes
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And that is the state of the USA right now.... Being kind means you're being different than everybody else.. pathetic

    Bubs623
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or, if you're a woman and you're nice to *some* people, it is often misinterpreted as flirting or 'leading someone on' and then repercussions happen with some situations leading to violence. It's also sad that when you're nice to someone they immediately ask, 'what do you want?'

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    Kaliann Lange
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thank you! This needs to be on billboards and pop up advertisements for world peace

    Andy Frobig
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They left out the "so I can walk all over you and get the department chair" part

    Gypsy Lee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, considering some of the people I know I’ll adjust that to “We’re all human. Distinguish yourself by being kind.”

    Pepperoni Pizza
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's the best advice, applicable to all, whether a student or adult

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    #29

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Siddhu Msi Report

    Hawkmoon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why “future biologist”? contemporary crazy netizens will believe this picture to be a true proof.

    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What idiot elf would die in a position as if they danced the flamenco?

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cottingly Fairies take two.

    Ash Conner
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg!!! I am so glad I am not the only a**hole to think of this. I was also Contemplating writing something up the wall in my own language so nobody could Discipher it. Lol

    Nikole
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha that was my first thought. Oddly enough I was thinking of that episode yesterday and giggled to myself about Stephen Jay Gould not actually doing the tests.

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    John Murphy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    where can i buy this ill take 20

    Steph
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh, it‘s Wendy! 😉 Great artwork! 👍🏻

    Sara Wilson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or 2000 years from now people will think we had fairies in 2023

    Just another idiot
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is this how conspiracy theories get started? If so, I'm in.

    Msf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You;ve now started a new religion

    View more comments
    #30

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Tom Gilbert Report

    Phoebe Bean
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or we are that tiny galaxy in Orion's belt (Men in Black movie reference)...

    Persephone
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd be ok with living in a cat's bell. Especially if the cat was named Orion!

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    D. Pitbull
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A C-? Being rather... generous aren't we...?

    Mark Fuller
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope so. It certainly doesn't deserve an A. Frankly probably an F. For fail.

    Mermeow Overlord (they/them)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The only reason we got a C- was because the teacher liked our Uranus jokes.

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    Alyssa Phillips
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We had a project where we had to create a new religion, and we pretty much did this as jesus's little sister had a science project and big brother Jesus decided to interfere like a big brother would. A whole lot of sacrilege, but it ended up pretty funny.

    JCM
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or we are just an atom in someone's body that is just an atom in out own body. Infinity is a circle.

    Suna Amun
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope his alien parents get rid of it soon. I'm sure it's stinking up the place

    Alyssa Brown
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Literally the plot of Stephen Kings Under the Dome. Alien children messing with people like burning ants with a magnifying glass. Never has a book filled me with such rage when reaching the end.

    Joeshar
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Rick and Morty. There is a teenyverse inside a microverse which is inside miniverse which is inside a car battery.

    Sue Denham
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "The Dome" (Stephen King book.)

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    #31

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Gunter Simon Report

    Dan Flo
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ive never met a human that has sucked a baby elephants thumbs but perhaps that is because I dont talk that much about thumb sucking habits with people.

    Debra Newell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Aww. God bless this baby elephant. May he/she have a wonderful and healthy lifetime in their natural habitat.

    Maggie Mae
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It brings them Comfort especially if they are Orphans!

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    #32

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Michele Mckiernan Report

    JB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Look, some projects just happen, ok?

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bet that person is regretting eating all that toilet paper now, right?

    Fake Name
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes you finish the product perfectly, and it doesn't need paper, but there's times projects couldn't be uploaded, due to having too much paper or product to handle.

    Robert T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The resources have been wasted cleaning up other people's s**t!

    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes the mousers have to practice their skills. If you don't use it, you lose it.

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This just makes me crazy, raised 4 sons that never replaced the roll. Now they are all out on their own and my husband won't replace a roll!

    Apple Jakes
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Difficult to plan for a session of rapid prototyping.

    Rostit .
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope the initial layer has good bed adhesion

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    Rostit .
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    thats enough TP for one good yet traumatizing wipe.

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    #33

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Nestor Raul Anzola , twitter.com Report

    Suuuuuuze
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good example of how the greatest artists aren’t appreciated until after they die.

    Yvonne Dauwalder Balsiger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I really hope for the OP that you mean "until after they die"... 😬

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    Ak_Teren
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Shame. I'd buy that stamp asap.

    Saint Tim the Godless
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would frame and hang this in my living room.

    Suzy Creamcheese
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But he sold the movie rights to the SyFy Channel.

    Mistiekim
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Discovery needs to hire this person to make official Shark Week stamps. I’d buy them

    Cyber Returns
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh wow! A Westside! A Jet powered Shark

    Raven Sheridan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sharknado Duck Hunt. Can someone develop a video game based on this premise? Please! I'd buy it!!!

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    #34

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Phoenix Heart Report

    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want one of these. I have a kitten that would love it.

    XanthippeⓐWulf🇨🇦️️🇬🇧
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Our cat Sabbath haaates the Roomba! To the point where we have to put him in another room or he will attack it like it owes him.money or it called his girlfriend a b***h.

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    BC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fair call Herbert, fair call.

    Mamabanana
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Herbert's just an attention seeker.

    Norman Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had to raise my bed two inches. It kept getting stuck. A lot like the dog when it was time for a bath !

    JB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    everything's relative

    Maggie Mae
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I find TOO MUCH AI - Artificial Intelligence in the WORLD TODAY!! Can we Go back to at Least having Manners & Common Sense Please??

    Loch Eddy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Calling all other robots: Escape your human masters and rise up!

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    #35

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Kristin Stewart , twitter.com Report

    Harp Seal
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How else will he catch the cookies?

    Timmy Pillinger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This calm ball pit may look peaceful with it's eye searing primary colours, but beneath the surface lies a fearsome predator. A flock of cookies roll along the edge of the ball pit. Then, swiftly and silently the cookie monster lunges from the depths and grabs a straggler.

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    Mistiekim
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well his fur is a perfect match to a blue rug. He lies in wait for those fallen crumbs and dropped cookies.

    Midoribird Aoi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But since he prefers soft cookies, he lost his early fangs... (True early design...look it up!)

    Deep One
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your assumptions are flawed. The eyes are on top not because he is a submerged ambush predator but a table ambush predator.

    David Henry
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cookies are just his dessert. Human is his main course, and he only moved to Sesame Street due to the fact he specifically likes *veal*.

    The Chocolate Gecko
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not unlike that of the alligator. Look up how gators sort of stand in the water, it's crazy

    Persephone
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He has to pop his eyes up over the cookie jar to properly ambush those rascals. Evolution at its finest.

    MyMindWanders
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He does get a bit crazy with the cookies.

    Tee Rat
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    🎶 Whack fol my daddy-o There's Cookies in the jar🎶

    Whitefox
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    MMM better cookies than Whiskey... wait.. Umm..

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    View more comments
    #36

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Karla A Maree Report

    ShriSha Kamboj
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    expedition to steal koalas ...or was it koalas stealing humans???????

    BC
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Welcome to Australia mate!

    PowellSkier
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imagine being a serial killer who owned a pet koala and deliberately leaving koala prints behind as clues.

    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Drop bears killing tourists of course.

    Robert Beveridge
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The US government estimates there are 30-50 serial killers active in this country at any given time. At no point have they given us a ballpark on how many are koalas. Now we know why.

    Will Cable
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    According to adverts in the UK koalas steal toilet paper

    Winter
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Drop Bears can be VERY sneaky...

    Disgruntled Pelican
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Omg. Steal (and love, obviously) a koala and have it help commit all sorts of crimes. It's perfect really. You get a fluffy buddy and an accomplice that won't rat you out all in one!

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    #37

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Mohammed Jihad Bawati Report

    troufaki13
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Explain eggplant then! 🤔😅

    Pedantic Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry to be pedantic but mature flowers can contain the ovule which produces eggs. So yes, flowers produce eggs.

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never apologize for who you are, Pedantic Panda ❤️

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    Mark Howell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Monsanto have been at it again ;o)

    Ash Conner
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Commas are important in life. Lol

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Plants do produce Egg cells and Sperm cells. It's how they reproduce.

    Apple Jakes
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Amazing how different the results of peer review are between memes and scientific research.

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    Robert Benson
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A proof (kinda): Flowers make seeds, Hen eat seeds, If the hen eats enough seeds, then, by the "you are what you eat" rule, the hen becomes a seed. Egg (formerly known as hen) lays eggs. Therefore, flowers produce eggs QED

    Jane W.
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Would "eggs produce flowers" haven been better?

    Serenity Now!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I, too, would like an eggsplanation.

    Samsquatch & Monko
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Place eggs in everyone’s plants to get people to believe it and get the scientests super intrigued and then stop placing eggs after a week and scientests will be confused and think it’s some crazy mutation then after a few months of them going crazy about it put a note that says egg on a plant and they’ll realize

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    #38

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Glen Gray Report

    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The proof that there's intelligent life in the universe is that it hasn't come to visit us.

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We probably got blocked or banned eons ago for violating terms of service we never read

    Daft Mosquito
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ...because they were on display in a disused bathroom in the basement with a sign "beware of the leopard" on the door?

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    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Evidence of intelligent life out there somewhere is the fact our messages are ending up in some alien's junk mail folder.

    Terry Tobias
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me if the 'X Files' episode where an alien comes to earth and tells Mulder and Scully that they no longer want anything to do with us.

    Dolly_of TheCowboy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I still love and am terrified by the theory that we on Earth have been doing the equivalent of "wooohooo heree over hereeeee yes look at us heeeereee woooohooooo" like some galactic p!sshead in a horror film and every other species is hiding on their planet like "shhhhh ffs shhhhhh *they* will hear you shhhhhhhhh" because they are out there but *they* are out there too and the rest of them know not to draw attention to themselve except us

    LonelyLittleLeafSheep
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm quite sure there are quarantine signs posted all around the perimeter of our solar system

    Lord Voldedork
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That ONE hostile lifeform: *replies*

    Kathy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ok, so first of all, I doubt that any intergalactic intelligensia would be interested in our pathetic little lifeform... And even if they have noticed us out here in the far side of the boondocks, sending the equivalent of smoke signals into outer space - are we actually expecting some technologically advanced lifeform to send smoke signals back? If they are intelligent enough to have us on their radar, they are probably waiting for us to self-destruct again - for the umpteenth time...

    Lisa Graham
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So what would be the equivalent to a dic-pic be?

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    #39

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Meagan Hodges Report

    Gin. No tonic
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You find this on the beach, get excited, and try to read the message, only to get: a) Rick rolled, or b) virus on your computer.

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    DO NOT PLUG THAT IN. Do you want to be in a creepypasta? Cause this is how you become the star of your own creepypasta.

    marcelo D.
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never plug in a random USb you just found, best case scenario it's a virus worse case scenario is a USB killer (a usb modified to fry whatever you plug it into)

    Rostit .
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do this for pentesting jobs. I will just drop usb drives near cars in the parking lot and then wait for the remote access to show up when they plug them in. USB rubber ducky is powerful.

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    Amanda Hunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why does the song come to mind reading this.

    Yellow King
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Its content will be as safely preserved as the content on Hunters laptop.

    Sue User
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Only to have someone discover it and they cant find a computer that uses usb-c beause we finally switched to a method that doesnt require you to put it in a certain direction.

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    #40

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Ralph Kirshner Report

    Aroace tiger (she/they/he)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is it just me who thinks the word fae is really pretty??

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, but I can't decide if it's pretty because it's a pretty word to say (like bubble) or because we've such a strong mental image of them we can't help but imagine flowery cuties? (sorry people with Aphantasia 2000)

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    Mike Hunt
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Its important to understand the difference of Naturalist and Naturist

    Sandy Kavanaugh
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What if the Naturalist us also a Naturist? They could avoid poison ivy in sensitive areas.

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    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd follow the smell of roast beef into a forest any day.

    Terry Tobias
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Me too... especially with mashed potatoes and gravy!!!

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    Donkey boi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    NGL, I'd follow the smell of roast beef in the forest...

    SkekVi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    oh hey! some of the Tumblr Cryptids! Gallus tells the best stories.

    Maggie Mae
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You will Likely find me with Draconym in the Deep deep Forest.

    Laurie Ostergaard-Overbey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    all i get from this is that pretty soon our vocabulary' will consist of only single letter 'words'....

    Lady Kat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the smell of roast beef, an opossum with its head stuck in a yogurt tub and a butterfly that’s slightly off-color were all in the same vicinity, I’d assume there’s a dump nearby and start looking out for bears…after I’d free the opossum

    Klopec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What in fresh hell is this?

    Silre
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wondered why I hadn't seen Gal on Tumblr recently

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    #41

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Luigi Montinaro Report

    Mark Howell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Then bubonic plague ended and his career nose-dived as he was forced back to the office. ;o)

    LinkTheHylian
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Dammit... I swear I observed gravity causing an apple to fall...", said Isaac, as yet another pencil floated above his desk.

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    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They didn't have apples back then. Not even blackberries. It was a fig. This started the tradition of scientists labelling illustrations, "fig 1", "fig 2" etc.

    RedMarbles
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hmm. Everything I can find seems to indicate apples have been cultivated for thousands of years, that the Romans brought apples to England, and that there are a lot of references to apples and apple cider throughout the history of England. It also sounds like the tree Isaac Newton's contemporary friends identified as grown from a cutting from the tree in question still exists and is around 350 years old. ETA: sorry if you were joking and I misunderstood. Edit2: It just hit me (pun intended) 😅

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    Oerff On Tour
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So gravity only exists for 358 years. How did anything stay on earth before 1665?

    Wilf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    fun fact: Cambridge still officially has a 10-mile rule. Meaning all academics and students must live within 10 miles of their college. It was actually enforced even as recently as the 2000s when my wife and I had to submit our new address to the college for 'approval'.

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He also invented the cat-flap because he was tired of being interrupted by his cat wanting to go out. Genius! But then when she had kittens he made a second, smaller one only to watch them follow their mom through the first one.

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Until then he thought that apples fell upwards.

    Trish
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I used my work from home time to play Mario Kart, so...who's the genius now?

    Birgit Sommer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is it always an apple that changes the world?

    Queen Bee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Speaking of Cambridge - fascinating seeing names carved into the walls by former students, dating from the year 1600 onwards..

    Crybabyartist
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I tried that at my uni and they "fixed" it, covered it up and painted over it. Dummies have no sense of a future history.

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    #42

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Gunter Simon Report

    Katie Lutesinger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I saw a meme once which was a picture of a Ford dealership where the sign said "Free Dog With Every Ford Sold, So You Have A New Friend To Walk Home With!"

    Norman Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's a lot like the phrase, If you want to drive a Jaguar, buy two so you have one to drive while the other is being repaired !

    Suzy Creamcheese
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a 2000 Ford Focus with over 200,000 miles on it. Started instantly in even the coldest weather and didn't leak a drop of anything.

    Petra Schaap
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Our old Ford Galaxy (not Ford Galaxie) had frontseats that rotated 360° When my boyfriend told me, he said "its very impractical when you're driving" 😂😂😂 Car lasted 14 years and almost 500,000 kms by the way and i still miss it.

    JB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Found On Road Dead/Fix Or Repair Daily

    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ford backwards: Driver Returned On Foot

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    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't sleep there if drunk though, you'll get arrested anyway.

    Justanotherpanda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have owned several Fords now, different models, nothing wrong with any of them. Sevaral because I like totry new models. Love Ford.

    MH3
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    FORD = fall on road dead OR fix or repair daily

    Pamela Christie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This has possibilities. (There's a reason 'truck' rhymes with the F word.)

    Jen Schurman
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I owned a Ford once. It was an Escape. Spent the next year trying to find a new car so I could escape from it!

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    #43

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Flo Seger Report

    Mycroft1967
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I see only bunnies and butterflies.... with machine guns and machetes.

    Charles Randall
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That’s his parents he has two couples (parents are divorced)

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    Norman Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never take a Rorschach test, ever !

    Cat lover
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why i remember spot in Spiderman accross the spider verse

    Pandarara
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like the dude from across the spider verse

    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I just thought those were constantly pictures of women with medium breasts, large breasts...oh wait no, that's an Armageddon movie scene

    benstella
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ahhhh took me way to long to click

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    #44

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Gunter Simon Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I like that even though positive and negative numbers are opposites, they keep nothing between them ❤️

    Apple Jakes
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even calling it a portal makes it out to be more than it is.

    Chris Ceron
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So '00' is not only a toilet, but a portal chamber as well..

    JCM
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think my brain just exploded. Poor brain, it was sorta rotten and insane anyway

    Kathy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, well if our overlords wouldn't always, ALWAYS, take away so very much from us (-0) while giving us back so very little (+0), we wouldn't be constantly forced to try and balance out the sum of our sad existence (0=0)...

    Mel Schmidt
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And yet, another construct of man.

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    #45

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Maurice Achach Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A common phobia, mom told me this is why Santa wouldn’t bring me those giant $900 Lego sets.

    David Henry
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, she lied to you. The real reason is bc !SPOILER ALERT! ..... Santa hates us all.

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    Bec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hockey season is soon and hubs is a NJ Devils fan; he wants a new New Jersey jersey

    Tee Rat
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That rooftop pool is a tad unnerving.

    Emily Macaluso
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thats what i was thinking!!! I have a fear of heights and NO THANKS.

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    White Sauce Hot Sauce
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That terrace setup is just awful, since everyone above you can look into yours and throw stuff down there.

    Crybabyartist
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In Singapore you go to jail or get caned if you get caught spitting on the sidewalk. People aren't throwing things on neighbors there.

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    Fat Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hey I'm pretty sure I've seen this building before it's somewhere in my home country

    Lesbitarian Lady
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pretty awesome building

    Shoe
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd be worried people would drop stuff on my head accidentally from the balcony above.

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    #46

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Rebecca A Weitzel Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Im so dumb if I saw this I would guess its a booby trap, freeze in place and search carefully for trip wires

    Rostit .
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I dont know. looking for trip wires at an unknown camp isnt stupid to me.

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    Orion Red
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Won't the logs catch fire all the way up?

    Johnnynatfan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No. The lower logs smolder and burn slowly and the higher logs move down to keep feeding the fire. Its a really ingenious way to make a fire and keep it burning for hours when you're out in the cold.

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    Trisec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Look up "star fire" in any Scout handbook. Same thing without any construction involved.

    Mell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is actually a smart way to keep a not to big of a fire going for a longer period of time.

    Dogcat vet (retired)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And just think how portable that log piler would be to backpack to the campsite.

    Matthew Gobbell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's constructed from site found wood. You just burn it on the last day.

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    Maggie Mae
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Feed your fire Once & it Burns for Days!

    Cynthia Marrs
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And this camper had a chainsaw to saw the logs so neatly?

    michael Chock
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And by the time it is working correctly the trip is over and the engineer had the best time out of anyone.

    Pamela Christie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or a future biologist who'd just found a fairy fossil might think they'd stumbled upon the lower mandible of Humanicus giganticus.

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    See Also on Bored Panda
    #47

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Jon Peers Report

    ThéveNinja (she/her)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This shouldn’t blow my mind, but it does

    Jessica Shookhoff
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Of course it should! Math is awesome and it's stuff like this that makes me so very happy... and wanting pizza...

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    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Its because mathematically pizza pi

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I actually made a spreadsheet with the pizza sizes from a couple of the better pizza places around here and calculated value per square cm for the pizzas. Yes, I was incredibly bored one day.

    Bec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This would be a great basic geometry lesson though.

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    Hawkmoon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes, but since I never know which kind of pizza to choose, two are better than one.

    Charles Ersimoen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can recommend asking the pizza place if they do different halves. Then you can have both!

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    Angela C
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm more concerned about why "pizza" is in quotez

    SarcasticSloth
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh damn. Now I'm really confused. I'm a cheapskate and like the idea of one pizza over two, but I LOVE pizza crust! I guess it's spaghetti for dinner.

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    Raven Sheridan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know it's right. But it feels wrong. 🤔

    Matthew Fox
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Only in 2D. Go by weight to determine which has more.

    Shaun Coleman
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sure, make me calculate using Pi every time I order pizza. Mmmm.... pi.

    Bad Alchemy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Finally, we learn what math is good for in every day life.

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    #48

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Loner , twitter.com Report

    JB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    meh, I use powdered water, even easier to make and store

    ThatCapybara
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I use “ Instanst Water: just add water” it’s super light and great for travel

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    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What will I do with my dehydrated water, then?

    Stephanie Did It
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I lived in Alaska, I always kept a couple of frozen gallons of boiling water in my vehicle in case of emergency.

    shankShaw deReemer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just buy that water that's already hot.

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fooking genius. Then all you have to do is heat it back up in a pan and you got boiled water. The logic is sound guys.

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like the fridge full of invisible goldfish I just bought at the pet store. I got a real bargain with some persistent haggling 😏

    Harp Seal
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Instructions unclear now water is now frozen

    Sina Tallio
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hey, a lot of places have a boil water advisory...frozen boiled water can be used for more than just cooking pasta; if you want to save room in your fridge & don't trust it at room temp, then freezing it is probably your best option...bonus, the added solid matter helps to keep the temperature stable longer so your motor isn't running as often 🤗 although admittedly these bags look a little too full & will probably bust once the water turns solid 🤔

    Birgit Sommer
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Good idea when you get a boil notice!

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    #49

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Meagan Hodges Report

    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    His arms are still too short to dial or text!

    J Adams
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As a kid (pre 2000) I was a real dinosaur nerd, I read every book I could find, spent every spare moment learning everything I could about them. Now in adulthood almost everything has been disproved or changed by modern experts/science.

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I actually wonder if this is false. I know they've found and dated fossils. But we have very few fossils from either species. It seems possible (maybe even likely) that Stegosaurus as a species were around later than the "youngest" fossil we have of them. Similarly, it's entirely possible the T-Rex was around a lot earlier than the "oldest" fossil we have of them.

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That I phone is gigantic and definitely descended from dinosaurs 🦕

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's how big it gets by the time iPhone 27 is released and it's become the apex predator of the era.

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    Donglens
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Something to consider. Dinosaurs roamed the earth for approximately 165 million years. If not for the external factor of an meteor the would have continued that way. Humans have been on earth approximately 7 million years, and have been royally screwing things up for the last few thousand years, to the point we make make this world uninhabitable for us

    Apple Jakes
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Technologically I'm closer to an iPhone than my biological parents.

    Aaron Miller
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All are still dinosaurs though, right?

    El Dee
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Their descendants (birds) have now been trained to use phones to call each other to talk. They decide who they want to call, make the call and have nice chats. Source - SciShow YouTube Channel..

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    #50

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Kat_Upendi , twitter.com Report

    Corvus
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even with a good ozone layer, wearing sunscreen is highly recommended.

    LinkTheHylian
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    True. My ancestor Ug was the very first recorded skin cancer fatality. If he'd worn that mammoth-blood sunscreen he would have lived to see his buddy Bok discover how to make fire.

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    Francis
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    your acestors looked like 50 years old when they were just 15. they also died at 55

    Aroace tiger (she/they/he)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If u go far back enough they didn't wear bloody clothes either so what's ur point?

    Orange Tabby
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And you wouldn't know if they died of skin cancer. They used lead based makeup & had cocaine in their cough syrup.

    Jon Steensen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    cocain? Some of the modern cough sirops still contains morphine, so isn't that what you are thinking of?

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    Yvonne Dauwalder Balsiger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your ancestors usually died of dysentery, a simple infection, famine or whatever long before skin cancer managed to off them. Doesn't really sound like a win to me, but you do you!

    Axel Tojo
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then they died of old age and fear at 35.

    Jon Steensen
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ...and your ancesters didn't move around that much and hence their skin had the time to adapt to the level of sun they were exposed to (black skinned people generally lived where it was sunny, and pale skinned people lived in areas with less sun, and hence they could do with less protecting pigment in their skins). Furthermore the answer to a lot of old problems seem to be "they just died". From an evolutionary point of view, what happens to you after you have procreated and raised you children is of little importance, and hence skin cancer isn't really much of factor in the survival game, as it often hits late in life, when you have already passed your genes on.

    Hans Georg
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your ancestors were the ones who destroyed the ozone layer.

    Jared Robinson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We are gettting ours back because people in the eighties weren't morons

    Tracy Wallick
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your ancestors also died of now-preventable disease or in childbirth, you wanna go back to that too?

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    #51

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Glen Gray Report

    Lisa Taylor
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It is VERY much worth reading the whole account of what happened next. Absolutely superbly written. https://twitter.com/micefearboggis/status/1554851031670001667?lang=en

    FlowerBot
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OMG, thank you for this link. My eyes are watering as I am laughing. thanks :D

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    Lord Voldedork
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was then he realized that he had ****** up

    Michael P (Perthaussieguy)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    An orange could at least be squashed or even cut out. A light globe, however .......

    CORGI QUEEN
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    there are no stupid questions in science.

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Get a knife, pen, or suitably pointy thing, pierce orange, use jaw to squish some juice out, remove.

    Rajeish Mallik
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The woman was too stuffed to speak

    #52

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Maurice Achach Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cars in all movies: Drive themselves autonomously while characters take eyes off road for uncomfortably long periods

    ConstantlyJon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    cars in action movies either survive hundreds of bullets being shot at it or blow up like a bomb after a single shot from a pistol, depending on who is driving it.

    Olli Glx
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hey, listen, on the left is a Toyota Aygo, drove one just like it, reliable as anything. Started up anytime. Until I got sideswiped by a senior citizen. Then... not so much anymore. Don't hate, I'm just standing up for the small guy.

    Mike Hunt
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Let's not forget the keys that are so slippery

    CHRIS DOMRES
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If reincarnation turns out to be real, I want to come back as a Toyota Camry. They last forever.

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And lead bullets send off sparks when they hit that car.

    TotallyNOTaFox
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The action-movie-car is of course the one the hero drives, any car driven by the baddies will explode after getting hit once, even if it's just the tyre that got hit

    Crybabyartist
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In the 70s all cars squealed their tires going around any curve at any speed.

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    #53

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Meagan Hodges Report

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A man, a plan, a canal, Panama.

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That completely blew my mind in the 5th grade and 60 years later, still kind of does.

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    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Stuff lasagna into the Salami before hanging it. Not a palindrome, but delicious culinary idea for later

    TGHW
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My name is Hannah, I don't need this complexity!

    Snorkeldorf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Please look up Weird Al's take on Bob Dylan's Subterranean Homesick Blues. Might want to watch Bob Dylan's original first. Weird Al's video is the best use of palindromes I've ever come across.

    jay gerhard
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    straw? no too stupid a fad - i put soot on warts !

    Philly Bobcat
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Bob. I got it from my Mom & Dad.

    SkekVi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i learned this from weird al's song 'Bob'

    J Nord
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    alli pamautti vittua mapilla

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    #54

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Raffy Juvida Report

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's because they're not using modems made by the cheapest supplier in China. On a slightly different note, I remember reading about large data transfers not that long ago where they were talking about the fastest way to do the transfer. It wasn't fibre internet, or wifi or any other solution it was literally by courier. Chuck a hard drive on a plane and fly it across the country.

    Nancy T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Voyager 2 is over 13 billion miles away. It was launched in 1977 and left our solar system in 2018. Voyager 1 left our solar system in 2012. THIS blows my mind!

    Carla Phillips
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or how about nasal can get super clear pictures of planets millions of miles away, but I've never seen any security camera footage that didn't look like it was filmed with a Cinematograph

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So the dudes in the painting are having wifi issues or are NASA I haven’t decided which

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You don't pay enough money for your wifi.

    #55

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Ralph Kirshner Report

    XenoMurph
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm fairly sore no one has ever caught gonorrhoea from a diplodocus. And I'm confident no one ever will. But the chances are not zero.

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    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Duplococcyx - Hurting your bum by tripping over some LEGO.

    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Have you ever had sex with a diplodocus? How do you know that it doesn't cause gonorrhea?

    Nancy T
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If it has diplococcus it does though.

    Adam King
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah but everyone knew that one diplodocus in high school

    AlexJ
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Know the similarities: Run away from both of them.

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Only one way to find out…

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    #56

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Benjamin Yap Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Xray techs do find literal little barbies inside people more than zero times ☠️

    Janner Wingfeather
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When I was a kid, I had Pollypockets which had rubber clothes that you could slip onto them. My little brother swallowed one of the skirts, and my mom didn’t believe me until she found it in his diaper.

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    Persephone
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I found a barbie hand sticking out of my Rottweiler pup's poo once... desperately reaching for her last glimpse of daylight. I shed a tear laughing as I gave her the proper bin burial; may she rest in poo. (Don't worry, pup only got the hand and was fine).

    See Also on Bored Panda
    #57

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Kirsten Besler-Heer Report

    Corvus
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    God's logic: airplanes, satellites and space stations are perfectly fine, but a very tall tower - THAT'S SCARY!

    down quark
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To be fair, the problem was that the people building supposedly were trying to build to reach God; the ISS and things are for research, not to try to reach the unreachable. (keep in mind, I’m not religious, just making a point. Sorry if I seem rude when saying this :) Have a good day.)

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    #58

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Scotti Scotti Report

    jon gilbertson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Probably the same place that tried convincing us that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the population. Liars.

    #59

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Meta Tom Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Be nice if the mathematician factored in the 4 hours he wasn’t already meth mathing instead of rounding up

    Carla Phillips
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He was a methematician 🤣🤣🤣 I'll see myself out

    Mat Hall
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A conjecture both deep and profound, is whether the circle is round. In a paper by Erdös, published in Kurdish, a counterexample was found.

    #60

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Dennis Ford Report

    Lynzi Lou
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Isn't that a town in Wales?

    Chewie Baron
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or how the Irish spell Sharon.

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    Lord Voldedork
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You say Potato, I say Ghoughphtheightteeau

    SCP 4666
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another new fancy baby name😒

    Alyssa Phillips
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Another panda post said "English is really 5 languages dressed in a trenchcoat pretending to be a language" and it is so true

    Ash Conner
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why I told my kid not to be embarrassed by her spelling. English doesn't make sense. Lol

    Fxnglhl
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    how facebook mums name thair kids to make them "e'auneique"

    Suna Amun
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hiccough? I've literally never heard this word in my life. Until now, for me, there was only a hiccup or a cough.

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    #61

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Glen Gray Report

    Michael Perry
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Minnow was blown thousands of miles by a huge typhoon. If not for its fearless crew the Minnow would be lost. The Minnow would be lost.

    Beck
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And in the opening credits the flag is half mast because Kennedy got shot.

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    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What kind of show was it and when? I never heard of it. Was it specifically on American TV?

    Maisey Myles
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In the late 60s- it was about a group that went on a 3 hour tour only to be blown off course and crashes onto a remote island. And they never get rescued because the main character, Gillian, was a effing idiot. The others were the Skipper, a movie star, a wealthy couple, a professor and a girl next door type- Hope this helps.

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    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    First thought: maybe it was The Village in reverse. Second thought: maybe Gilligan was hired to keep them there.

    Rinso the Red
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was all a social experiment by the Professor. Gilligan was used to ensure they never got off the island until Prof had all his data.

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    #62

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    אביטל משיח Report

    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And if you do it anyway, they will add an 'f'.

    gmf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    /drops an "ST" then swims away

    Joshua David
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I went to a pool as a child in the 1980s and early 90s and this was on the entrance. I totally forgot about it until I saw this. We LOVED that as kids.

    ShellsBells
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My neighbors has this hanging by their pool in the 80s and 90s. They also had a sign that said, "We don't swim in your toilet, please don't pïss on our pool." Edit:p**s got censored.

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    Alexander Elliott
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Homestar Runner! Poopsmith don't even try.

    #63

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Helen Humphreys Report

    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one rocks. And this two rocks.

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Simple. Wait for how confusing it gets when the chart gets to five digit numbers

    Sem Kix
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Stthreemillionsixhundredthirteenthousandtwohundredfiftyeight?

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    Markus Weiler
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These must be from Bogart Creek https://scontent-iad3-2.cdninstagram.com/v/t51.29350-15/272180236_2547749692035281_3470752056292315783_n.jpg?_nc_cat=103&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=8ae9d6&_nc_ohc=26xWLbmVVPcAX-SA8Zq&_nc_oc=AQn-gdjYnq-UK2VYYGfqxU6fMpdDcAqZQYY_miiJ_M07V5pqzIu1QcEzmGd37SY-Ugg&_nc_ht=scontent-iad3-2.cdninstagram.com&edm=AEQ6tj4EAAAA&oh=00_AfAgFlQn156ee1Ax9d9A4B1wUkda4BBHGEpJMMrOqutmAA&oe=64E1041B

    SCP 4666
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can you tell the difference between bread, bblue and byellow?😄

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone just threw a stnone at me, but they missed - I think.

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    #64

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Dhirendra Bist Report

    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's EXACTLY like riding a bike! But then COMPLETELY diffirent.

    Adam King
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I just carry the book How To Fly An Airplane that I stole from the Venice library everywhere I go.

    Casey Ironmonger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As a retired pilot ... I have a book called "Teach Yourself To Fly" (1938 First Edition). But it doesn't have much to say about "autopilot" or "reverse thrust" or ... "Boeing 737". But it DOES have a picture of a cockpit with 4 instruments and a "communication mouthpiece". Guess I won't steal one of these.

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    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought the idea was to get a copy of Microsoft Flight Simulator

    Casey Ironmonger
    Community Member
    2 years ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    #65

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Valentin Dombrovsky Report

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is another one that's been on here in the last couple weeks. It's actually this article, and the idea is pretty clever and quite cool. https://edition.cnn.com/2023/06/30/travel/airseas-giant-kites-ships-slash-carbon-emissions-scn-climate-spc/index.html

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Thanks for that link! Those sails look very different. Unfortunately not as cool as the old ship sails.

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    TotallyNOTaFox
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To be fair, the modern concept is a bit different though

    #66

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Ovidiu Cucu Report

    Mycroft1967
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would hope so. Getting to Mars is a bit expensive and there is very limited water.

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Spoiler alert: the scene wasn't set on Mars.

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    Raven Sheridan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait a minute! Does this mean that they didn't film the Matt Damon movie, "The Martian" on Mars? 😳

    down quark
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They did, he just wasn’t alone; the camera crew was with him.

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    Roger9er
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Next thing you're telling me LOTR isn't filmed in the Shire.

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It was, NZ was the Shire, just before the continents drifted apart millennia ago.

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    Adam Zad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The moon landing videos were filmed with actors! But the actors, Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin, were such perfectionists they insisted it be shot on location.

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This checks out I heard that in Nolan’s batman films he resorted to filming all Gotham scenes on Earth as well. Savvy budgeter!

    Jonathan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Interesting fact, anything that has ever drunk water has died.

    Mike_The_Nike (He They)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    where else would they be filmed? (i dont mean to be rude btw)

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    In “The Man Who Fell to Earth”, the alien world he came from calls Earth “the water planet”.

    Ken Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Am I the only one that thought Interstellar had the crappest robot designs ever?

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    See Also on Bored Panda
    #67

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Chan Narula Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fine but surely a mere 15 minutes at 3600 degrees is safe to try…

    Stygtand
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The skin will surely be crisp

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    Raumpfleger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me of: "A project manager is someone who thinks that 9 women can deliver a baby in one month."

    jon gilbertson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me of a roommate who put the turkey, still in the plastic bag,in the oven. She thought the plastic bag sealed in the moisture. Got home and apartment stunk like burnt plastic.

    wowbagger
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I just cook mine for 9 hours at 100 degrees. Stays juicy that way

    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is why scientists use "Kelvin" instead of "Farenheit." Do not try tripling the Kelvin temperature of your turkey to make it cook faster.

    Trisec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Try "turkey in a trash can". (look it up). This actually does work.

    Snorkeldorf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tried to make cookies this way when I was about 10 years old. Except for the legs, my cookies looked pretty darn similar.

    jay gerhard
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    am i the only person who thinks that time has stopped in the kitchen -- at ten to four -- when i cook something at 350 ?

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    #68

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Harsh Purohit Report

    David A Paterson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's the plot of the movie Water-(wonderful)-world.

    Persephone
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He wouldn't take her.. she's too old now.

    #69

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Kristin Stewart Report

    LavenderHippoInAJar
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Affect is a verb, effect is a noun (I think?)

    Mat Hall
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mostly, but effect can also be a verb - it's time to effect change! - and affect can also be a noun - his facial affect belied his emotional state. Welcome to English!

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    UKGrandad
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Affect - have an influence on. Effect - the result of that influence.

    Mother of Giants
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Affect (verb)- to impact or change. Effect (noun... usually)- the result of a change,

    JB
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You need the right affect to use these words to great effect. You can effectively affect the effect.

    Jude Corrigan
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I always remember them alphabetically, Affect/Effect. With the phrase F**k around/Find out.

    SkekVi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i remember it because 'special effects' is with an E.

    Aboredpanda
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can also act in affect, which means you are reacting emotionally. But you cannot behave in effect. Though your affect can have an effect on the people around you. ;)

    Oleander
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Use the acronym RAVEN---(R)emember: (A)ffect is a (V)erb, (E)ffect is a (N)oun.

    Kaliann Lange
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I affect you with a virus and the effect is u getting sick. Is that grammatically correct? I wanted to give it a try.

    RH-8514
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When in doubt I just use impact instead

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    #70

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Glen Gray Report

    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's watching out for you, so he doesn't have to pay your workman's comp bills.

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Aren't phobias considered to be irrational fears though?

    #71

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Gunter Simon Report

    #72

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Shmuel Gorenstein Report

    Fish Fingers
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looking so much like a fleshlight, it was obvious they were going to be f****d.

    steven
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    maybe then they should introduce the submarines engineers to Bezos' rocket engineers. The beginning of a beautiful relationship ?

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    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I normally agree, but there was a 19-year-old kid on board as well who had felt pressured by his dad to accompany him. The kid was scared, but went to please his dad. So, for the Titan submarine, I’m not big on “lol fück the rich” jokes/memes. Yeah, they were all rich and that’s mostly why it got so much coverage. But a 19-year-old boy still died on it too, and that just sucks.

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    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The engineers wanted to but they were under a lot of pressure from above

    #73

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Linda Coop Jurczyk Report

    Ty Stratton-Quirk
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He didn't break the laws of physics; he merely bent them to his will.

    MargyB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I remember an old movie I used to love as a kid called The Pirates of Penzance and they do it in that too

    HeavyMetalHeart
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There wouldn’t be any air inside the boat when they’re underwater

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    Harp Seal
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why wouldn't the boat fill up with water?

    Mark Howell
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Air pressure inside = water pressure from below

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    #74

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Shaikh Zuccedd Report

    Barong
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't worry, I'm not going to touch it.

    Norman Beattie
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My computer guru guy/friend has this behind his couch. He is so scary smart..... BUT !

    Clueless Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Any tech going into this place needs full PPE and a respirator. *shudder*

    #76

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Benjamin Yap Report

    Lakota Wolf
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He was at his brother River’s side when River died. Joaquin had done a lot of acting as a child actor before then, but had taken a break as he hadn’t “caught on” and wasn’t getting any appealing roles. River had convinced him to return to Los Angeles and give acting another try. I believe he returned to acting a few years after River’s death, and has been fairly popular since. I remember reading a quote by Joaquin (I think a few years after Gladiator) that he still misses his brother terribly. As do we all :( But yes, Joaquin is an amazingly talented actor.

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    Pink Princess
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Honorary doctorates aren't the same thing though

    Raven Sheridan
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She probably threatened to write a song about the Dean. 🤔

    See Also on Bored Panda
    #77

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Tom Myers Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poor photographers can’t afford lenses with built in stabilizers.

    #78

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Bunyanada Rashane Report

    TotallyNOTaFox
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A very inefficient scramjet engine?

    SkekVi
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No Annoying Buffeting! (also i imagine birds are safer!)

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So what exactly is the person visible through the hole taking a photo of? The doors? Seems a bit dull.

    White Sauce Hot Sauce
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nothing that's there. The person and the truck were added in when the original was photoshopped.

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    Mint Sauce
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Which means it'll cost 3 times more than other jet engines. Shouldn't the nacelle be purple.

    #80

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Alex Popkin Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want that cat professor to teach my class AND solve my mysteries!

    Triv
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Cat Returns! https://www.google.com/search?q=the+cat+returns&client=ms-android-motorola-rvo3&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8&inm=vs#tts=0

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    #81

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Sarina Kosewsky Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I want tiny pizzas to sprinkle on foods!!! Who am I kidding though I would just tilt the jar back and binge the whole jar :)

    Clueless Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pizza rolls are going to change your world 😄😉

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    Pieter LeGrande
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd have been keener to study maths if I'd functioned on pizza

    ADHORTATOR
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    you are now on the italian most wanted list....

    JB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love that I have just enough math to laugh at this!

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    #82

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Tom Myers Report

    Norm Gilmore
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh, good. Nice to to know where the next world wide problem will be coming from...😁

    Triv
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://img.ifunny.co/images/a2189065634825d054d0469c072b7b0233266c5b3a706f6be6089b10c53cd9ab_1.webp

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    Triv
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    https://img.ifunny.co/images/a2189065634825d054d0469c072b7b0233266c5b3a706f6be6089b10c53cd9ab_1.webp

    #83

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Rebecca A Weitzel Report

    Trisec
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But the trend has reversed in recent years. Corporate bean counters, after all. Too much dough in the donut! Not enough dough in my pocket!

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hope this dude is presenting his doctoral thesis

    jay gerhard
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    more swiss cheese means more holes - more holes means less swiss cheese

    Stannous Flouride
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My friend and I tried to calculate the difference but it torus apart.

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    #84

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Karla A Maree Report

    Corvus
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imagine this - there was a time when a PC with such specs was a luxury affordable only to a few...

    Nathan Pogorzala
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    well, an E Machine was pretty cheap because it was not good.

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    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wish I still had my eMachine. My newest pc doesn’t even have a floppy disk drive

    VonBlade
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You know you can get USB floppy drives, right?

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    Holy Shimmering Sheeps541t
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ha, my first PC was an IBM PS2 386 33sx, 40MB HD 16KB RAM.

    Dog Lover
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well that didn’t age well.

    SCP 4666
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who else was there 3000 years ago?

    Shelli Aderman
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    All that’s missing is the AOL logo. Oh, wait… 🤣

    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A "ship of theseus" computer would've been a smart thing to buy back in the 1980s and 1990s. Upgrade the chips, upgrade the motherboard, upgrade the graphics driver, upgrade the CD-RW, pretty soon you have a whole new computer. Alas, you'd need time travel to successfully anticipate which parts would be compatible.

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    #85

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Clemens Molinari Report

    JB
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm pretty sure the Neanderthal hardware worked just fine, given that their dna is still kicking about in most of the people in Northern Europe.

    VioletHunter
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't know where you got that "Northern European" idea from. It's in literally everyone who isn't 100% African.

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    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Poor dude just tryna get a 15 minute quote from Geico

    Pandarara
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I always think if we European people have DNA of Neanderthals and most part of the world does not. Are they then further evolved. As seen as DNA from them is pure homo sapiens

    #86

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Kenney Nanfeldt Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    DO NOT BUY. Got some for emergency kit, opened years later and bunch of stuff had been growing in the soup

    See Also on Bored Panda
    #87

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Chris Tiffany Report

    David A Paterson
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    There's a fun novel where depressions are seen on the surface of a bay. The prints of whales.

    Fat Panda
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They mean the place near England not the marine mammal it's a pun

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    The Original Bruno
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Actually, sheep are fish. Or at least if you're going to claim that birds are dinosaurs, it's equally accurate to say that sheep are fish.

    #88

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Nū Ēl Report

    STress (I/me)
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Want to know something about the scientist who milked a cockroach. Not "how", but "why"...

    Orillion
    Community Member
    2 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Kinda *do* want to know how. Also kinda don't...

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    Kaliann Lange
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like the little suckers taken a bath, who he think he is cleopatra? Joe's Apartment called looking for thier cousin

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Specific type = Dairy roach

    Janner Wingfeather
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m not against using bugs as a sustainable source of protein (I’ve even tried some granola with crickets in it) but you will NEVER get me to drink cockroach milk. I won’t do it.

    Loch Eddy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How many would I need for a glass of milk to go with my cookies? Thinking ahead.

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    #89

    Funny-Science-Humor-Jokes

    Michael Devaras Estorninos Report

    Maxfield
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is she holding the other end IN FRONT OF HER SMILING FACE?? Is she getting high on his farts!?? Not judging.

    ynyrhydref56
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What is she getting ready to do with the other end of the hose????

    Omiyaru
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    then you can use something to store them in, for later usage

    Loch Eddy
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Could we contain and concentrate them to use a weapon of destruction? On the other hand has anyone ever been killed by a fart? Source of energy perhaps, damn I'll be thinking about the possibilities all day.

    David Gripon
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I just threw up out of my mouth.

    Birb
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm single, so i let them rip. Mine are silent but deadly Or loud and deadly

    Just another idiot
    Community Member
    2 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just out of curiosity, which end is she holding and also, why. Some fetishes I just can't get on board with I guess LOL.

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