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Dad Of 4 Girls Tweets Conversations With His Daughters, And It’s Impossible Not To Laugh At Them (50 New Tweets)
If we were to look at numbers alone, it would be clear that James Breakwell is one of the most popular family content creators on the internet. With over a million followers on Twitter alone, his stuff reaches people from all over the world. But as impressive as it is, the size of his fan army isn't the reason why we at Bored Panda adore him so much. It's Breakwell's actual material that sets him apart, which is unlike the recycled pseudo-inspirational clickbait you so often see on parenting blogs. Take his tweets for example. Sharing snippets from the conversations he has with his daughters, James paints a funny and sincere picture of his household, and you don't need to have kids to enjoy them. His humor is universal.
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#1
Hazel Hello 3 years ago (edited)
Ok, the food could of been so delicious that they got full eating it, so they weren't hungry anymore, but they cooked a lot of the food so there is some left over.
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Brenda 3 years ago (edited)
Yup, if I didn't turn them into a completely different meal, I had to wait at least 1 day to serve it again. Son (28) still hates eating the same food 2 meals/days in a row. Mom & MIL helped me learn to get creative, & plan ahead for 2 different meals from the same food. Not being even close to a domestic goddess meant a huge learning curve. 30 years later, I have no idea how to cook for only 2-3 people now! 😆 I freeze a lot of plated meals for lunches, when nobody wants to cook, to stretch the food budget till payday, or give my "adult" kids food to help them out.
Michelle C 3 years ago
If I were married with kids, I’d probably be the one to take it literally and explain why my family and I are having leftovers for dinner.
Tim Douglass 3 years ago
When I was a kid my mom would tell us "you'd better eat it, because it's going to keep showing up until you do!"
RELATED:
#2
Charlie Birkner 3 years ago
Yes, sports fans, that's another 100 points for the little one and it looks like Breakwell hasn't even scored yet.
We managed to get in touch with James and he was kind enough to tell us more about his family.
"I would describe my parenting style as one of loving neglect," the dad explained to Bored Panda.
"I’m the opposite of a helicopter parent. I’m more of an observe-from-a-safe-distance parent. That way, my kids develop a sense of independence and learn from their mistakes, all while I’m outside the blast zone."
#3
ί𝔫ＣίŦᵃт𝐔𝐬 3 years ago
My son fell off his scooter when he was about 4 or 5, just lay there for a bit, raised one arm and yelled, "medic!"
Trisha Howson 3 years ago
I've had this happen lol I'm raising a terminator to I'm proud mama terminator lol
Featherking 2 years ago
I hate it that I was exactly like that as a kid. And my nickname is Terminator. For a reason.
#4
It's Izzy 🇺🇦 (They/Them) 3 years ago
Look, I broke my toe walking around the same house I've lived in for my whole life the other day, it's all up to skill.
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Snorkeldorf 3 years ago (edited)
I hear that. Broke my toe on my pajamas. Was bent over loading a laundry basket full of dirty clothes to take to the washing machine. Stood up, with the basket in my hands, and the toe next to my big toe got caught in the hem of my pajama bottoms. Toe got pulled up, then back in an instant. I heard the little "crick" as the toe snapped. Who knew such danger lurked in a pair of comfy pajamas?
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
I did that when I was a kid. Twisted it when I was diving off the edge of the pool. Yup. My kids are the same
Jennifer Potter 3 years ago
twisted my ankle once running around with my cousins on the beach one summer - stepped sideways into a hole and had to wear an air cast for a week :( :( :( That was a good lesson in, "try not to injure yourself, so that you can stay longer, and have more fun," lol
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#5
Spleens the cat fan 🇵🇭 3 years ago (edited)
The mom must be having the worst time moms are kids manager
Wisteria Lacoss-Arnold 3 years ago
Join the club! I'm only 18 and I have chronic joint pain, no socal life and no socal media.
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SoapMonkey76 3 years ago
Is it normal for a B.P user to upvote every single one of their own comments? Seems a bit sad really.
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Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
I'm so GLAD my kids don't fight and never have. But this Karen game sounds entertaining 😆
Breakwell thinks it may have been his own folks who shaped him as a father.
"My own parents were very laid back. They never pressured me in any way, yet I excelled at many things. I also failed—hard—at an exhaustive list of activities," he said.
"My mom and dad gave me the freedom to figure out who I was and what I wanted to do. That’s a large part of the reason I’m a comedy writer today. So basically they ruined my life."
#6
Jody Whitmarsh 3 years ago
I only know how long ago the 90s were because all my kids were born then. Then I cry to myself when I realize my oldest is 30 now
GayBoi 3 years ago
I'm literally 13 and it hurts a little when somebody says the 00's were a long time ago- Like I didn't even fully experience 00's, I was only in it for 2 years and I couldn't even walk for most of it, but it still hurts a bit 😅
Trinity Cottrell 3 years ago
I'm 22 and feel old when I bring up "When I was in High School" and "When I was a kid" stories...
Ladi Fuller 3 years ago
Do not worry. My son said he was listening to old school. I asked him what he was listening to and he said Eminem, lol. I am just about to dig my grave.
#7
Spittnimage 3 years ago
Announcing a hidden comment makes us bored pandas go looking for it 🤦🏻♀️
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Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
I used to pretend that *I* wanted to sweep/mop/vacuum etc.. "No, your not old enough. *I* should do it...no really I'm not sure your ready.." every..time. then both kids would want to do it. So one swept and the other vacuumed or whatever haha
Kim Lorton 3 years ago
When my niece was 5, she was taught about money, saving it and earning it. She gave toe and foot massages for 25 and 50 cents for 1 minute! Ha ha ha! Her time limit on all massages was 5 minutes! I've never had so many toe massages and and extra minute for 25 cents more! That was a fun time!
Tiny Dancer 3 years ago (edited)
Smart kid, love it! Much more wholesome than when I was a kid in the '60s-'70s. My parents were in a band, so we had lots of parties, some involved poker, most were just lots of drinking and singing. I was 10 and charged everyone a quarter a drink, including my Mum and Dad, and made a small fortune over the years, lol!
Load More Replies... 4Rs & a Silent Q 3 years ago
About 10 years ago my son stalled going to bed by giving me a foot massage. Felt like a bad parent but my feet felt so great!
Jennifer Brown 3 years ago
My mom used to let us play beauty parlor and we could do her hair any way we wanted
Pandaroo 3 years ago (edited)
You should do this to trumps hashtags, not friendly BP
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#8
meow point1 3 years ago
At least the girls' mess likely doesn't involve pee or poop (though, depending on how old they are...)
Trisha Howson 3 years ago
Looks at camera and whisper screams yes I do and then you want to pull out hair
Seb Benson 2 years ago
In television and film it's known as the "breaking the fourth wall". Often to highlight a "seriously?" moment where the actor/actress connects to the audience directly with a look.
Load More Replies... #9
Synsepalum 3 years ago
The serial killer in a hockey mask doesn't use a chainsaw. Jason Vorhees wears a hockey mask, and he slays with a machete. Leather Face uses a chainsaw, from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. He does not wear a hockey mask; he wears a mask made from the flesh of his victims.
Adam L 3 years ago
She could have seen the "Neighbors" episode of Bluey... Mum: "What in the world are you doing!? Dad: "Chainsawing!"
John Dilligaf 3 years ago
no reason why it has to be either-or. Tree trimmer by day, serial killer in hockey mask by night.
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago (edited)
As far as my history nerd brain can recall, there has never been a female chainsaw murder. An 🪓 yes.. but not that one.
Wondering Alice 3 years ago
Maybe the female chainsaw killers are all just good at not getting caught
Load More Replies... Humor, however, is what ties evertything together. "Jokes keep me sane," James said. "A terrible disaster just makes for more content. For example, this week, my appendix ruptured and I nearly died. It made for a great newsletter."
But that's just scrathing the surface. If you are interested in hearing the resr of it, you can subscribe to James's newsletter at jamesbreakwell.substack.com. "It’s the best way to learn more about my parenting style and my occasionally exploding organs," he added.
#10
Elaine Elder 3 years ago
Mt daughter once said "I'm mad!" I said "I reckon you got the same britches to get glad in!" My husband said "Man, I wish I had been able to know your grandmother" "yup, she was a hoot 'n' a holler, with a twinkle in her eye"
#11
Jennifer H 3 years ago
I don't want to grow up. I want to be a toys r us kid. Wait... That didn't end well.
Strawblurries 3 years ago
All I wanted was to learn cursive. I was sure once I could read the spells grown ups used to keep Now they no longer teach it.secrets I'd have all the magic in the world. .
Anikulapo 3 years ago
I don’t what about you guys, but I can eat chocolate cookies whenever I want. In your face, Mum.
Michelle C 3 years ago
Being an adult is not all it is cracked up to be, but there’s beauty in being an adult, too!
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
Said EVERY KID EVER. My one is now 19. Wants to be responsible but eats cold chicken soup out of a can. 😕 meh. It's summer
Wysteria_Rose 3 years ago
Oh, my god. My 17-year-old has the same thoughts of when he turns 18 and graduates high school. "I can do whatever I want." Me and his dad had a long good laugh and then laughed some more at his confusion.
#12
Cara G 3 years ago
The trick is to utilize the entire surface area of the arm in this situation. My parents have five dogs. All except for one of them lose their minds when I walk in the door trying to say hello to me. I've developed this technique to be inclusive so that nary a canine feels left out. Just circle your arms around them in a large sweeping motion that way you can touch four dogs at one time.
Kim Lorton 3 years ago
My cat when I was a kid, loved her foot massages! She would come lick my toe, then begin to rub up and down my foot, scratch his face on the other toes, and sit really close to get his chest rubbed. He was a smuggler but didn't like to be held. Snuggled was on his terms, like bedtime and nap time. He'd slide u dear the covers and lay his head on my pillow and I could put my arm around him. Or, his favorite thing, snuggle my head! He'd curl around my head and purr in my ear! I miss him.
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
Before I finished reading I thought..still has two feet! Or, one dog on lap for snuggles and two hands. My gran was a professional dog breeder for 50 years. Often there would be between 20-30 puppies, plus her adult 8-12 dogs. Good times!
Jody Whitmarsh 3 years ago
I think that's what is keeping me back from getting a third one... oh and maybe my mate 😉
#13
Deborah Harris 3 years ago
My 19 year old is too lazy to even use the toaster, can we swap kids?
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
My 16 daughter does this still (and other foods), likes to make me a cuppa tea when I wake up too. Now, my 19year old son ...well he just opens a can of whatever, soups/stews, beans etc and eats it from can cold lol.
Jane Dorothy Warner 3 years ago
I had the 11-year-old grandson yesterday and told him I felt ill, so he made me toast and coffee without my asking. Good lad, but I hid it deep in the bin cos I didn't have the heart to tell him I felt too ill to eat it.
#14
Delta Dawn 3 years ago
My youngest was having huge problems with that last school year. She was the only one doing anything, so I gave her permission to stop being the group martyr. She ended up with a C and salvaged her self respect.
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Sheila Stamey 3 years ago
Why do teachers even still do it if they aren't going to grade the group aspect as in the equal division and actual doing of the labor? I'll be honest, as a substitute, I was truly evil. If I had a group project in the syllabus,I was going to assign people who would accomplish that project, not one person per group to unwillingly drag five others and end up doing it themself. I was hugged once for this. I really was
Artsy Bookworm 3 years ago
Every time I'm assigned to a group project, nothing happens until I take the lead and assign stuff to people and then keep on behind them to actually do the work😑
Bookaday 3 years ago
And then I know some of them won’t, so I have to do more because of my control issues. I was supposed to do 2/3 of a project (I knew my partner) and she only did 1/3 of her work and complained of boredom during class. So I did some of hers and it didn’t get finished but I don’t think our teachers noticed.
Load More Replies... Jennifer H 3 years ago
This is why I always seemed to ake charge and do a lot on my own. The problem with this is people pick up on it and just come to you to get sh!t done.
Michelle C 3 years ago
Yup. I had something similar happened to me in high school. There were five of us in the group and only two of us actually did our parts of the assigned project. I got an A, The other kid got a C, and the rest failed the project.
#15
BamBoo Mo 3 years ago
Personal time dilation. Think life experience over time
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Michael Largey 3 years ago
Especially since we remember almost nothing of our first two years.
#16
Trisha Howson 3 years ago
The things you do as a parent and your thinking I'm sorry mom dad I know I was a bad kid I am so sorry. Yep I'm getting that payback now......bows head.
#17
BamBoo Mo 3 years ago
True young lady but they are all extinct and buried and turned to oil.Do we want that for our dinos
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Caroline Starr 3 years ago
Thinks *don't show this to my granddaughter, don't show this to my granddaughter* The 4 year old who takes 3 velociraptors to bed.
#18
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
Yup. As I sit here after taking ibuprofen, a heating pad on my back and an ice pack on my knee lol. I'm 46 next month
Illustrious G 3 years ago
Ooof, last time I had a slipped disc in my back it started because I stood up from the couch! 🥲
#19
JMil 3 years ago
Great comments on this post, but I vote for this one as the win.
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#20
Eliza Osenbaugh-Stewart 3 years ago
I had lots of fun at school- that's where my friends were and we got to do projects together and run around at recess.
#21
Anna roberts 3 years ago
Mostly because Grandma would have killed us if we were bad....
Load More Replies... Downunderdude 3 years ago
I can remember my mum saying 'Mrs Soandso said your behaviour at her house was beautiful and you have lovely manners' [me: *beams*]. 'Why don't you behave like that at home?' I remember thinking it was unfair that SHE was grumpy when I had been well behaved. But having had 3 kids myself: mum, I get it.
meow point1 3 years ago
Either that or they're letting out all that bottled up desire to fight.
SupernaturalPanda 3 years ago (edited)
As a grandma myself may I just say .....LMMFAOOOOO!!!!!!
Atchaco-Leigh 3 years ago
It's a parent's job to raise a child right, it's a grandparent's job to undo all their hard work.
#22
manalonedies 3 years ago
When I was 5 I asked my father if he remembered when there were dinosaurs. He said to ask Mom. So I did.
Kim Lorton 3 years ago
Oops! Need to apologize! Thought that mom was not in the picture! I am so glad she is! Makes your daughters even more wonderful!
Michelle C 3 years ago
I have a sweater very similar to that one and I am not ashamed of it at all!
#24
Kim Lorton 3 years ago
Your daughters sound especially smart! Must be paying close attention to what you said and your wife said. So very sorry their mother is not in the picture, but as they grow up, you will see her everywhere in them! And they will get smarter, sassier and you will simultaneously, be angry, frustrated, happy, sad, proud as the day is light, in them as people, young women of consequence, and that they will be able to handle any verbal confrontation with a boy, forever! I can tell you now, YOU GOT THIS! As the oldest of 4 girls, sometimes we all take the lead, one at a time, we act the youngest, we are all fierce, and funny and when we get together at the same time, we are fierce and have the best time! Even if we still do argue! We a,ways finish a conversation with " I love you!" And work out our issues. We say sorry and mean it, and try very hard, not to hurt each other's feelings. We have now lost both parents, and we are closer than ever, and they are, my best friends and sisters!
Emmy Dumont 3 years ago
Their mom is the picture. He talks about her A LOT!!! She's cool with all his craziness.
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Anna roberts 3 years ago
4 passes at 6, she may actually make a good player in a couple of years LOL
Shannon Hawks 3 years ago
MVP or team captain at least. little kids sports are the best. just having fun
#26
Jennifer H 3 years ago
Where are our futuristic dryers that load it directly from the washer and fold them too? i want a Rosie from the jetsons already people. Lol
kool mudkips 3 years ago
I'm convinced my husband believes things just magically happen as well.
Michelle C 3 years ago
The extent of magical thinking gives me cause for laughter more often than I care to admit and also reminds me not to take life too seriously for my own good! (I worked with young children in previous professional capacities.).
Nadine Bamberger 3 years ago
My dad always leaves the dirty dishes on topof the dishwasher and is genuinely surprised when they don't just teleport inside.
The_OG_Catlady 2 years ago
That is what my 19yo still thinks to this day. At least that is how it feels sometimes when I ask him to fold it and it doesn't get done.
#27
Bee she/her 3 years ago
I asked my mom to teach me how to make grilled cheese before anything else.
CelticElff 3 years ago
LONG SLEEVES. What kind of monster teaches their kid how to cook bacon -without sleeves- ?? Grease does not tickle, my friend.
#28
Caitlyn Fell 3 years ago (edited)
Well? Can they? It's an important world changing question you know
excuse.you 3 years ago
I had a horse that seriously wanted pizza. Any kind of pizza. - sausage, mushroom, green peppers, onions, pineapple, ham - any topping at all. I asked my vet about this. She didn’t believe me until he devoured a slice while she was at the barn. No other horse was interested in a taste of the same pizza. She said that he didn’t seem to have any ill effects, and it wasn’t like I had him on a pizza diet. She couldn’t recommend it as a regular thing, but he never seemed to have a problem from the occasional treat. Odd especially in that wheat is not usually fer to horses, nor dairy. I wouldn’t make a habit of feeding pasta, but maybe it’s more OK than I would have said, before I met that one horse.-found on quora from Kathleen schmmit.
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General Anaesthesia 3 years ago
At that age, any question is important to an inquisitive mind.
Karen Clark 3 years ago
Depends on the horse! They have quirky likes and dislikes just like humans. My horses love black licorice sticks....the soft, chewy kind. Speaking to a friend one day near my horse, I was waving an opened 1lb. pkg of licorice around for emphasis when I felt a tug. He had grabbed the entire lot from the packaging and sucked it into his (big!) mouth. He enjoyed every bit. Called the vet, and he just laughed. "Won't hurt him" he said. And it didn't. 💁♀️🐎
#29
Jane Dorothy Warner 3 years ago
I always say, the difference between childhood and adulthood is that the child won't go to bed, and the adult can't wait to!
#30
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
Right? James needs to have a BBQ and invite us all. Seriously, this family needs at least a YouTube channel
Load More Replies... SupernaturalPanda 3 years ago
“911 what is your emergency ? “ “We have an epic burn here. Send help . “
Celtic Pirate Queen 3 years ago
At around age 40 my Doc tells me I have arthritis. I ask him how that could be avoided & he literally old me "die younger".
Jennifer Potter 3 years ago
Yikes - such a "helpful" doctor! *shudders in empathy*
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Mosheh Wolf 3 years ago
Did you hear that, George R. R. Martin? You don't want to do a Robert Jordan, and write so slowly that you die before you finish and somebody else has to finish your series! PS. not complaining - I think that Brandon Sanderson did an amazing job and really managed to capture Jordan at his best.
Dubnaught 3 years ago
A Wheel of Time might've been the preferable way to go. I read an article where Martin basically said that if he died tomorrow, the rest of A Song of Ice and Fire would die with him because he didn't have all his ideas backed up or a designated ghost rider. So I really hope we're not straight up screwed.
Load More Replies... Kim Lorton 3 years ago
The best thing about reading, is when you discover a book series already out and you need to read about 12 books to get to the present in the series! I always think it is wonderful and it makes me giddy, to know I have books to read, that I know I willlove, because I read book 1 and there are now 12 more to read!
Nikki Sevven 3 years ago
Wait until 7 discovers that authors sometimes die before finishing the series.
Blackstone 3 years ago
I worry about that exact thing a lot more than is probably reasonable. My favorite author has promised several more books in my favorite series, but it was four years between the last book and the previous one. Other than obviously wishing good things upon him, I'm also quite invested in his longevity. Long live good authors!
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MyloXyloto 3 years ago
The release of stranger things seasons. At this rate, the time it took to make season 4, the next one will be released in 2026... 😓
#32
Spleens the cat fan 🇵🇭 3 years ago
When i was 3 I would say Mickey Mouse pub house instead of club house
Jennifer H 3 years ago
Technically they have this a walt disney world. Lol
Load More Replies... ί𝔫ＣίŦᵃт𝐔𝐬 3 years ago (edited)
My sister used to yell out the car window "F**ky Fried Chicken!" (Kentucky Fried Chicken) The first time my grandmother heard that....
Colin Timp 3 years ago
I though The Rolling Stones Beast Of Burden was "Big Suburban" when I was little
Aubrey Mortensen 3 years ago
Using this for all singalongs with my teenagers who "can't believe I know the lyrics"... just to get a laugh.
Roze Townes 3 years ago
I once thought that "monstrosity" was mom's prosity. Makes a very funny story for parties 😂
Stephanie Did It 3 years ago
Me singing with Michael Jackson: Keep on with the four star drop, don't stop till you get enough
Pepe Silvia 3 years ago
In Chop Suey, there's a part where he stretches the word "forsaken", and as a french kid I thought for sure he was saying "ses carrottes" (his carrots).
Broad Panda 3 years ago
Ha! One time when my daughter was 3 or 4 we were listening to Jay Z in the car, as we often do. "Hard Knock Life" was playing. It samples the song from Annie. From the back seat I heard her lil voice sing "It's the hotdog life for us!"
#33
Tiny Dancer 3 years ago
I would be remiss if I did not post this image and video link for the awesome Sesame Street song, "Daddy Dear" ("Daddy dear, oh daddy sweet, do dandelions roar, do daisies have feet?"), you're welcome! VIDEO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWMAYFNIAco Sesame-Str...51-png.jpg 
Mosheh Wolf 3 years ago
SInce the name actually comes from French for "Lion's Tooth", the joke doesn't work...
#34
Michelle C 3 years ago
I was this kid growing up! Anytime I could get my hands on a good book, I would!
butt soup 3 years ago (edited)
orrrr... a library card for unlimited free books
Load More Replies... #35
TheBreadKnight 3 years ago
I want a taco truck WITH somebody to make them. Boom, freeish tacos.
Ramona Jackson 3 years ago
Your kid seems to be a budding chef. Nurture that but be sure to teach the rest of your brood to do dishes.
#36
Michael Sanders 3 years ago
Sorry the answer is no, thank you for playing, you will not be moving to the next round.
Daniel Bryan 3 years ago
You need to introduce your kids to tabletop roleplaying games. The math is built in and you really don't have to trick them, plus it's fun. Been playing Dungeons and Dragons with my kids for years, even my 5 year old joins.
#37
Lisa Harris 3 years ago
This is great stuff. As a mother of 8 + 3 step children, this stuff cannot be made up!!
April Caron 3 years ago
Yeah… if I could just throw myself in the dryer for 30 minutes… I could come out wrinkle free, having shrunk a few sizes… then I’d be set! 😂
#38
Jessica Cifelli 3 years ago
I personally think it looks like something else, but to each their own
#39
3 Owls In A Coat 3 years ago (edited)
I love roasting a bunch of veggies (carrots, onions, garlic, tomato and potato) and pureeing it with broth to make a rich creamy puréed veggie soup - so good with curry powder or garam masala in it! Melt some mozzarella on top and serve it with crusty bread, mmmmmm
#40
Tyler 3 years ago
one of my teachers was saying how her niece went home with an essay on who her role model/hero is and she wrote it about her dad because she didn't know how to spell Leonardo DiCaprio
#41
Michelle C 3 years ago
I was great with math until high school. Higher maths have never been my strong suit. Give me a good history or linguistics text any day!
Michael Largey 3 years ago (edited)
High school math teacher here. Up to a certain point, success in math is just a matter of intelligence. But after that point. it's also a matter of talent. That point is usually encountered sometime during the Algebra 2 course.
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Barbara Vandewalle 3 years ago
When I look at an algebra problem, I still get this sickening feeling.
#42
Duesvolent90 3 years ago
*Takes a knee in front of child* Would you like to be a grown up for a day to see what it's like to do whatever you want?? :D Also make sure you save enough money for mortgage before you do that, utilities, and food for the house...Oh and car payment...oh yeah fuel for the car, maintenance...Sh*t I need clothes??
Juana Aceves 3 years ago
I love the way your girls see the world, you guys must be wonderful parents, keep the good job!!!
#43
Al Christensen 3 years ago
This reminds me of my former wife. She hated having her picture taken because she always ended up looking funny. I explained that was because whenever someone pointed a camera at her she made her "Ew don't do that" face.
Jaya 3 years ago
My boyfriend is the sweetest, kindest person I've ever met, and normally he looks really sweet, but when he has to pose for a picture he always has this very serious look that makes him look so angry. All his passport photos look like they're police photos of some murderer haha.
Al Christensen 3 years ago
To more accurately represent the passport holder, the photo should look like they just got off a very long and crowded flight.
Load More Replies... Michelle C 3 years ago
I don’t consider myself photogenic and never really liked how the Lifetouch pictures turned out. I also felt they were rushed, so that was probably why. Sure, it’s basic, but don’t rush it!
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
I'm VERY surprised the schools haven't started telling kids to use selfies for their pictures. Free for the schools
#44
JJ(they/them) 3 years ago (edited)
At this point he needs a whole ice bath. these kids are burning him raw
Load More Replies... Michael Sanders 3 years ago
What an adorable lie to make this funny. I want to pinch his cheeks.
Trisha Howson 3 years ago
Ohhhh haaa this is when I start asking them questions they may not know and if they say wrong. I tell them right answer and I say see I do not
#45
#46
Caitlyn Fell 3 years ago
Of course. Life is all about time management and prioritizing. You raised her well 🙌
#47
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
One is cheese..one is bacon..are you Canadian? Can I come for dinner? Lol
Illustrious G 3 years ago
I love when kids make up songs! They can be very creative and clever!
#48
Wisteria Lacoss-Arnold 3 years ago
"The food here is *bang* weapons grade."
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GayBoi 3 years ago (edited)
I'm just imagining hearing "YEAST" aggressively and seeing a loaf of bread fly through the air 🤣🤣
Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
My daughter said "potato" instead of Tornado. I never corrected her either
tragicaltales 3 years ago
“Wow, Kansas got a big potato yesterday. It was on the news and everything!”
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meow point1 3 years ago
It's an annoying word people yell when they throw things. SMH
Load More Replies... #49
Trisha Howson 3 years ago
Yes there aways doing everything else but eating then come back in 5 mins I'm hangry. Um.....well eat your food
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Ellieee 3 years ago
In third grade we would always have lessons on the carpet to I guess be more connected or smthg? Anyways we were bored so my friend tried to show me how to breakdance, and I spun around a bunch and accidentally tripped a kid who was carrying a couple boxes of pastels. He landed flat on his face. The teacher called my parents. It was not a great day
NG 3 years ago (edited)
Our computers crashed and I started bawling and told the whole class we were being hacked by murderers. That was a fun phone call for my parents 😂😂
Load More Replies... Amy Stone-Chandler 3 years ago
I remember the girl in 3rd grade that openly picked her nose and ate it(OFTEN) oh and on our birthdays the male teacher would put us each over his lap in front of the class, have the class counted out loud as he spanked us....yeah. seriously. I'm convinced he chose 3rd grade because he got "more" spanks in each kid. IRONICALLY HE volunteered to talk to the class about sexual assault and where/who is allowed to touch you...
Cara G 3 years ago
This is....HORRIFYING! Are you able to elaborate? How long ago was this? Is this man still teaching? Was he ever disciplined for this? More importantly, are you okay?
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Michaël Buckingham 3 years ago
That's because the brain remembers emotions, such as birth, death, etc.... However can't remember what was for lunch last Tuesday.
Duesvolent90 3 years ago
Great thank you...*slips slowly into extreme anxiety remembering all the embarrassing times of my life* alright where's that bag of cookies?
Lindsay Morrison 3 years ago
My wife a lawyer was walking with our daughter in a stroller in our neighbourhood and met a judge she knew. My daughter was interested and said he said hello. As he was leaving she said Mom is he an idiot?
Brent Kaufman 3 years ago
These are very funny. I don't believe any of them happened, but they're funny.
Lindsay Morrison 3 years ago
When my daughter was 4 she walked into the living room with a bracelet of her mother's. You can't wear that to school it's not your mom said. She asked if she could borrow it whenever she wants.
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Deborah Harris 3 years ago
As long as it wasn't someone screaming 'get out of the house now!!!' In your own voice then you should be fine 🙂
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Michelle C 3 years ago
She’s right. One of my ears actually bled because I was that stressed out when I got my ears pierced. I’m a wuss when it comes to pain.
Caitlyn Fell 3 years ago
Me too. I got my ears pierced at fourteen and it took me ages to work up the courage before that. And I like tattoos to some extent and might get one...the only problem is that I really am a wimp about pain 🤣😅
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JJ(they/them) 3 years ago
life is brief. the world will end. bathes are forever. EMBRACE THE BATH
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LinkTheHylian 3 years ago
I'm afraid the manager is busy, but I can let you speak to his sun.
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John Herro 3 years ago
"If you have 10 cookies and someone asks you for 3 of them, how many do you have?" "10" "Correct! Now, if you have 10 cookies and someone FORCIBLY TAKES 3 from you, how many do you have?" "7" "No, 10 and a dead body."
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Benita Valdez 3 years ago
Wow I haven't heard that term in a long time. Has it made a comeback or did I just out your age?
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Michelle C 3 years ago
I would welcome having a ton of books to keep me occupied! I was that kid who got yelled at for staying up too late reading and then complaining that I was tired in the mornings!
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Caitlyn Fell 3 years ago
🎶It was a normal day (it was a normal day) We were waking Up, Not a mess upstairs (No mess allowed upstairs) The Kids Woke up with a mischievous grin (Mess)🎶
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meow point1 3 years ago
I was the same as a kid. Sometimes I wanted to go to school, sometimes I didn't.
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Deborah Harris 3 years ago
Plus there's only a certain amount of times you can listen to an off pitch 'Three blind mice' until your head explodes.
Panda-Moan-I-Ummm.... 3 years ago
I'm using this answer!!!!!! It's so much nicer than when I say cuz you suck at it smh in a realist🤷🏿♀️
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LinaLovesBooks 3 years ago
She's not scared. success is undeniable at this point
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Anna roberts 3 years ago
Littlest one in the blue has to be the soccer player, she already has the look
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Colin Timp 3 years ago
I was always in a panic about remembering my locker combination. For the life of me I could never remember it until I was at my locker.
Ramona Jackson 3 years ago
I still remember my last school locker combo. Wish I didn't, I could use that space now. 22-36-22
Load More Replies... #85
Michelle C 3 years ago
I grew up in a computer literate family and I am not an IT whiz by any means like they are!
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Anna roberts 3 years ago
My brother, "But, Mom, I am trying to work on her reaction time, she is too slow."
Yoga Kitty 3 years ago
It also was my brother M's fault that my brother B split his head open - M just calmly took a step to the side when B tried to ram his head into M's stomach. There was a very heavy table right behind him...
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Christof Irran 3 years ago
Don't forget to bring up current politics at Thanksgiving, so you don't have to buy as many Christmas presents.
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Michelle C 3 years ago
That would create another problem: A full tummy and an Advent full of regret!
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Bored Birgit 3 years ago
As a kid I always wondered what Mom and Dad do when I'm asleep. Could not imagine!
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Panda-Moan-I-Ummm.... 3 years ago
I'm starting to think you're the Mom lol
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LinaLovesBooks 3 years ago
Okay class, now that you've sliced him in half, there are two of him
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Panda 3 years ago
I don't know Twitter, but could this be in the timezone of the reader?
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L̸1̶z̵ 3 years ago
I prefer my living room where the snacks are cheaper and pause/rewind/ movie switching are options
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Bubs623 3 years ago
My mom's remedy for everything was : have a Spite, take a hot bath and then take a nap. Sleep is, after all, the poor man's physician.
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Jaya 3 years ago
I love how kids actually use all parts of the house for sitting and lying down, whereas us boring adults only the boring parts like chairs. I can't even remember the last time I was lying under a bed or on top of the table, man what a boring adult have I become.
Lene 3 years ago
It's been a few weeks since I sat on the table in front of the couch. And I keep telling my kids to not sit on tables. Lol. I miss lying down on the kitchen floor and just absorbing the kitchen-vibes. I did that a lot before I had kids. I may do it again soon. I would do lie down on the bathroom floor again too, if it wasn't for all the potties.... 😬
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Caitlyn Fell 3 years ago (edited)
That's...really sad. But whatever floats your boat? (And fair tbh)
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Christof Irran 3 years ago
What is it about "Can I borrow a saw?"? I worked for this law firm (in accounting) and I called the supply guy, asking whether I can borrow a hacksaw (just to yank his chain). He said they didn't have one. Two minutes later he and five lawyers showed up in my office, curious about what I needed a hack saw for.
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What do you think ?
Emmydearest 3 years ago
At first I was like:" ...a 10-year old, a 9 year-old, an 11 year-old, a 6 year-old, a 7 year-old, a 5 year-old...How many kids does this man have?!". Then I realized time passes.
Ramona Jackson 3 years ago
I looked it up, he has 4 daughters who love the color pink.
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Lindsay Ameye 3 years ago
Most of his tweets are made up and didn't happen for real. He even uses old and known jokes.
Alphabet Soupy 3 years ago
The whole parent influencer/tweeter/content creator seems wrong to me, like…don’t depend on your children for Internet points. Actually, shield them from social media til they’re old enough. And don’t get me started on YouTube families that have channels for the family AND separate channels for the children💔. Just let them be.
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Teh_alan 3 years ago
The entirety of the MCU was fake, yet earned 26.6 billion dollars. News papers are fact (probably) and....
Load More Replies... butt soup 3 years ago (edited)
is it just me or are some of these pretty rude & impolite things for kids that young to be saying to their dad, if these aren't just made up? banter is always great & can be a fun way to show affection but some of these are just... kids being mean for the sake of being mean. that's pretty sad. if it was just a few tweets like that it would be funny, but this guy has been featured on bp for years & pretty much all his content is about his kids "roasting" him or being inconsiderate to others, which makes them seem pretty unlikable... i know his content is made up for attention, but why does he paint his kids as such rude brats? (before you downvote, keep in mind that downvoting gets an account banned. disagreeing with someone isn't a reason to ban them.)
Bored Retsuko 3 years ago
Can't tell you how much I agree, both with the on-topic and with the downvoting issue. In fact the latter is what keeps me from going on a rant about how on earth he can consider this behaviour funny and even share it... well, sort of what you said.
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Smegma cheese 3 years ago
5 year old. Why do you make up fake stories and post them online. Me. I seek approval and likes from strangers on the Internet. 5 year old. You're a d******d dad.
Emmydearest 3 years ago
At first I was like:" ...a 10-year old, a 9 year-old, an 11 year-old, a 6 year-old, a 7 year-old, a 5 year-old...How many kids does this man have?!". Then I realized time passes.
Ramona Jackson 3 years ago
I looked it up, he has 4 daughters who love the color pink.
Load More Replies... Lindsay Ameye 3 years ago
Most of his tweets are made up and didn't happen for real. He even uses old and known jokes.
Alphabet Soupy 3 years ago
The whole parent influencer/tweeter/content creator seems wrong to me, like…don’t depend on your children for Internet points. Actually, shield them from social media til they’re old enough. And don’t get me started on YouTube families that have channels for the family AND separate channels for the children💔. Just let them be.
Load More Replies... Teh_alan 3 years ago
The entirety of the MCU was fake, yet earned 26.6 billion dollars. News papers are fact (probably) and....
Load More Replies... butt soup 3 years ago (edited)
is it just me or are some of these pretty rude & impolite things for kids that young to be saying to their dad, if these aren't just made up? banter is always great & can be a fun way to show affection but some of these are just... kids being mean for the sake of being mean. that's pretty sad. if it was just a few tweets like that it would be funny, but this guy has been featured on bp for years & pretty much all his content is about his kids "roasting" him or being inconsiderate to others, which makes them seem pretty unlikable... i know his content is made up for attention, but why does he paint his kids as such rude brats? (before you downvote, keep in mind that downvoting gets an account banned. disagreeing with someone isn't a reason to ban them.)
Bored Retsuko 3 years ago
Can't tell you how much I agree, both with the on-topic and with the downvoting issue. In fact the latter is what keeps me from going on a rant about how on earth he can consider this behaviour funny and even share it... well, sort of what you said.
Load More Replies... Smegma cheese 3 years ago
5 year old. Why do you make up fake stories and post them online. Me. I seek approval and likes from strangers on the Internet. 5 year old. You're a d******d dad.
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