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People say laughter is the best medicine for a few good reasons. It is known to provide potential therapeutic relief for physiological ailments, alleviate stress, and lower anxiety levels

It is the ultimate feel-good drug that requires no prescription. All you need is an online resource like the Funny Instagram account to help you snap out of a funk and feel better. 

The profile description says it all: “Laughter is our language,” expressed through memes and social media ramblings about daily life. You may encounter posts poking fun at romantic relationships, dishwashing methods, and parenting problems. 

We’ve compiled some posts to create this list for you to enjoy, whether you’re killing time at the DMV or taking a short break at work. And if you’re feeling down, hopefully, this can be a good pick-me-up. 

#1

Funny-Relatable

funny Report

Tina Girard
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Exactly - the ring is just to let you know somebody would like to talk to you. There is nothing that compels you to answer if you don't want to.

BookFanatic
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My friends are very active and reach out several times a day. Which is fantastic and I love being loved by them. But sometimes my little introvert self is exhausted. I'll just text them a picture of a rock. The implication being that I'm okay but currently hiding under my rock and will emerge soon.

Epona
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do the friends know that implication though? Good friends who know how introversion works will understand

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kansasmagic
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I started teaching (at a community college) all of us new faculty were "encouraged" to get a phone number strictly for school/student use. Students "expect" us to be available 24/7, after all. I just thought "they'll have to learn to live with disappointment, then".

Ruth F
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you have a work-only phone, that is so that you can turn it OFF outside of working hours and not be disturbed when you are not working.

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Id row
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm gen-x and grew up unreachable. I don't like anyone thinking I jump if I hear a phone beep. I may or may not return a text within 72 hours. And I spent my career in IT.

Alexandra
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep and it should apply to anythig job-related as well. No sending or responding to work messages outside of working hours unless you get compensated for.

Raymond Smith
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wouldn’t even have a phone if work didn’t pay for it. I don’t have any social media presence except a few how to videos on YouTube about RV living full time. Don’t miss the chaos that comes with it.

BossyHossy1
Community Member
Premium
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Do. Not. Disturb.

Celtic Pirate Queen
Community Member
1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

OMG, yes! I have had to explain this to friends, family and employers that MY cellphone is for MY convenience. Not so you can bother me in the toilet.

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    #2

    Funny-Relatable

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    Smol Frog
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it is kind of sad that they hate themself though

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    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The person I hate most in the world wouldn't even notice an extra 100k, so yes please

    Gibberint Dark
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't care how much somebody else gets... I'd still have £50,000 Quid...!!

    Passerby
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, $50,000 is $50,000.

    Susie Main
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    #3

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    Captive
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Srsly what a stupid advice

    KatSaidWhat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ok, in that case, you get the 2k and I'll take the 100.

    Amy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Give me the 100k and I’ll test this theory for you…

    Cat Palmer
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I totally agree. I tell you what, I'll take the 100k and spare you the pain of dealing with it, because I'm nice like that..

    Jeremy Bolanos
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We need to ban rich people from the Internet.

    Sand Ers
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Depending on where you draw the “rich” line, arguably we need to ban rich people.

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    Id row
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, I'll take the 100k and sleep in, thank you very much.

    Marno C.
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I volunteer to do a scientific study on myself. Please send me the $100K and I will start earning the $2K. Will get back to you with results.

    Rosie Red
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's what a rich person would say.

    Mike F
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't think so, the rich person knows damned well how they got that scratch and it means just as much as the 2k this individual is crowing about. They're just being an idiot.

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    Laughter’s plausible benefits are backed up by research. A report published by the American Physiological Society revealed that “mirthful laughter” may increase endorphins by 27% and human growth hormones by 87%. It was also found to be a “preventive adjunct therapy” for diabetes care. 

    #4

    Funny-Relatable

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    Moosy Girl
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or in a tent at a festival. In fact maybe just don’t kiss any sleeping people… or dogs… or anything really. No, just… just let sleeping everything lie. :p

    Mab
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or didn’t consent because you are sleeping..

    mSpencer
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or a coma patient with no visitors

    John Monteith
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Jesus loves you. Nice to hear in church. Not so much in a Mexican prison

    Zoey Miller
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or live with dogs and cats.

    Little Capybara
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How would even know you are being kissed because you are…like…sleeping?

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    #5

    Funny-Relatable

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    DumYum
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Kissed a guy when we were stopped at a red light and the rolled into the car in front of us. Luckily, it was just a bumper to bumper tap.

    Robert T
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You make my heart go boom-titty-boom!

    Amity
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Even with the blurred I can tell georgie has the cute duck icon

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    #6

    Funny-Relatable

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    BoredPossum
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We never did go for them, we just never got a word in to politely explain that we aren't available.

    Grey Beard
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because when I dated quiet, laidback women, our relationships ended up with long periods of silence and inactivity. Two of us the same is quite boring, for and because of both of us.

    Greg Wilhelm
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I showed my wife this. Hahaha she is definitely the fire to my ice

    Philly Bob Squires
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm the fuel for the wife's fire! We can both be a bit spicy though.

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    kansasmagic
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, I don't go for that, so...

    Nosbigo
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Quiet men marry loud , bossy women because they like to watch the fireworks when she feels compelled to speak up.

    Maartje
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because these two opposites complement each other?

    Nannychachi
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ask my husband. He'll tell you why.

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    In simpler terms, here’s an explanation from Harvard Medical School faculty member Natalie Datillo: the brain’s reward system goes offline when not activated regularly. She describes laughter as the “most cost-effective way” to get it back up and running. 

    Studies also show that these perceived benefits are magnified when another individual is involved. According to researchers, the arousal likely comes from validating emotions brought on by shared laughs.

    #7

    Funny-Relatable

    funny Report

    Kalikima
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had a guy I had ONE date with, show up at my house at 5am, asking if he could come in! I'm like "no, I'm sleeping, wtf?!" I shut the door in his face, and took my àss back to bed.

    Elio
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like this person had an encounter with a hobo-sexual.

    Gen X Feral
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Dayyuuuummm! That was so cold it gave me a chill. Felt really refreshing actually lol

    somnomania (she/her, queer)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    tbh this just seems safe, if someone wants to spend the night that decisively and doesn't already know your address (and you're not, say, a ten year old), that's a little creepy to me

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    #8

    Funny-Relatable

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    Wietse Pot
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Two words: compound interest.

    HTakeover
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They also take the money off their victims. Depending on the lore, they also control the victim prior to death and have them withdraw all of their money, and transfer assets first (Lestat did that).

    Zoe Vokes
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The answer for Twilight (and I know this because I read the richest fictional characters list from Forbes years ago) is centuries of interest on his money, a doctor’s salary for hundreds of years and his adoptive daughter Alice being psychic, seeing the future and betting on winning stocks.

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    Zoey Rayne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They murder people and steal their valuables and then invest them. C'mon.

    paigeofcolors
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you had money from 1892, and sold it in the 2000's you would be very rich

    Maude Lin
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wish I were a vampire. Humans are THE WORST.

    Amity
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    well if they step into the sun, they don't die, they just ...sparkle (also one of the vampires can see the future and therefore predict stock trends)

    google slave
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Right. If you're still broke after 300-400 yrs vampirism was wasted on you.

    Shan Cruz
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Plus they take the fortunes of those they bleed out

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    #9

    Funny-Relatable

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    Will Cable
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't think they will reproduce, they can't get a car in a space how on earth will they get their 'mini' in the right spot.

    Zoey Miller
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These are the same people who scream "disabled parking spaces discriminate against non-disabled people, it's my freedumb to park wherever I want"?

    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Driver is so clueless that he will interpret this as "Don't photocopy this condom"

    BringMeMyDragons
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My sister had a bmw and parked like this. It infuriated me to the point I wouldnt ride with her anywhere. She "didn't want people parking next to her". 🤬

    Farnzy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is the best example of these I've ever seen. Sure, a witty card with a poem is funny. But the simplicity of this is hysterical.

    Mya Lugar
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Quick! Two other cars park really close to him!

    Uncle Schmickle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Love this. It should apply to SO MANY PEOPLE.

    Gracie Mae
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i used to have business cards to leave that said 'if you f**k like you park, you'll never get it in'

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    Many people recognize the power of laughter—so much so that a variation of yoga is centered around it. 

    Laughter yoga practices the same breathing exercises to keep the body present and calm. As the name suggests, it involves giggles and silly movements between breaths.

    #10

    Funny-Relatable

    funny Report

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm going out to buy some glow in the dark dinosaurs this very day

    BoredPossum
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Okay, I will marry the one who did that, regardless of gender or if it's just a cartoon.

    Sinnsyk Jakte
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love all things glowy. This is not too far off from something I might pull.

    Abigail Moritz
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not me immediately searching Amazon after this.

    Gen X Feral
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    😂🤣😂 It could of been much much worse. That's just cute

    HTakeover
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ow, my brain! I just got a brief half-second flash of the emotion I felt as a kid charging these things up.

    Vampiresscrow
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Right!? I loved charging them things up. It was part of their charm. (Now I need dinos in my life.)

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    #11

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    Luke Branwen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Drunk, certified bad word now. Freakin' dystopian.

    troufaki13
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Valerie definitely knew what she was doing 🤭

    Min
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    8th grade is when I discovered the joys of vodka in a water bottle. She definitely knew.

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    Orysha
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is she a better soccer player with or without vodka?

    Ben
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, Valeria totally knew what she was doing. And I am pretty sure she put the bottle in the freezer

    Christopher Rayle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Whoever didn't notice the "water" wasn't freezing is an irresponsible parent.

    ColdSteelRonin
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, the word vodka does originate from the Slavic word voda which means water. So....

    google slave
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Vodka in a plastic bottle? Sounds like my second yr of 9th grade & why I was kicked out of that particular school.

    Tom
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    freezer ? as in thing that turns water to ice - and Valerie never considered it might not be water?

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    #12

    Funny-Relatable

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    ColdSteelRonin
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Full title: Is My Child Stupid?: A Parent's Guide to the Understanding of Specific Learning Disabilities - Including Dyslexia

    Taibhse Sealgair
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How long did it take you to find it? Just asking.

    Caroline Overill
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mother wouldn’t have to ask……no wait a minute…

    Rebekah Fuentes
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This book is currently in it's 958th edition.

    Melli Peep
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mom had Bright Child Poor Grades. Of course no one knew what ADD was in the 60's....

    Tim spoon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'll be handing our daughter the copy of our " princess bitchface syndrome " . Good book btw.

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    A study published in the Journal of Epidemiology provides verifiable evidence on laughter yoga. The findings revealed that people who practiced it for 12 consecutive weeks showed a lowered risk for metabolic syndrome. 

    Throughout the experiment, participants also showed reduced excess body weight, stress, and body mass index.

    #13

    Funny-Relatable

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    setsuriseikou
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This. This is the kind of man I need. The one I can be a best friend for.

    Luke Branwen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I personally see no point in a relationship if your partner isn't your best friend at the same time.

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    Slapdash1
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Aaand she's still b!tching about it. Look at the caption. How about little miss princess grows up a wee bit and starts communicating?

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hopefully she's bragging about him, but really appreciates him to his face.

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    Sinnsyk Jakte
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I do believe he cracked the code. I'd have laughed and gone full bestie with him.

    Emily Phillips
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm so glad I have this with my guy

    Raymond Smith
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My best friend of 27 years has been with me through all sorts of life’s ups and downs. We will be married 9 years in October 2024.

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    #14

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    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It IS true though: keeping up with the Joneses doesn't make you any happier.

    Ace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, of course not. You need to beat them, not just keep up with them.

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    Bettye McKee
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's been years and years since I did the comparison thing. When you're happy, you don't care what other people have or think or believe.

    Schmebulock
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Stop keeping up with the joneses and be the people the joneses keep up with

    Layla Layla
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You don't need to get a stupid tattoo to remind yourself of anything

    SkippityBoppityBoo
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Get it on your p*nis... It'd be way funnier!!!! (disclaimer - please don't actually do that for gosh sakes!)

    Rosie Red
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow, that's a great way to look at it.

    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The bane of a jazz musician. Compare to despair.

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    #15

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    Jessica Scott
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    F***ing hotels. What kind of BS is it that you have to pay for parking at a hotel? What do you think I did, walk 300 miles to get here?!

    clairebear
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My elderly mother was admitted to hospital with pneumonia. I was there 3 hours and the parking charge was £15.00. She was in 4 days. I used to work at the same hospital and they charge staff for parking albeit at a discounted rate.

    Loreta
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Charging staff?! That's so greedy and wrong

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    Tim spoon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Also, the place where you work.

    google slave
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I suppose that depends on what part of the hospital you're talking about. Hopefully not the ER!

    TheReader19
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The really odd thing is, that in the UK; the hospitals don't own the parking. It's run by outside companies, not even sure they get a share of the profits ; furthermore the nurses have to pay to park there.

    Eunice Bentley
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    as someone who hears complaints about the price of parking at the hospital everyday that I work I agree. I just can't do anything about it.

    Amy Manning
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The hospital is the worst one. No one is at the hospital for the fun of it. No, not even new parents.

    Sherry Watson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Especially when you're the patient!

    Lester the Space Duck
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm surprised that the hospitals here in the US don't have coin operated water fountains.

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    Tragedy and comedy have long been linked together. Studies have shown that humor can be an effective tool in dealing with and even deflecting trauma. 

    The researchers who wrote this 2015 journal article found that healthy humor styles may help shift perspectives from a traumatic event. Serious matters can become more lighthearted without minimizing the gravity of the situation. Instead, it helps regulate stress.

    #16

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    TheHyyyype Report

    Earthquake903
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I swear there is a team of slow and omnipresent drivers out there that tag team stalking me. Most of them drive Subarus. But all of them have armor piercing headlights. I curse them with all of my hatred for having the audacity to also be traveling by car in my general vicinity.

    Zoey Rayne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    George Carlin: "Ever notice how when you're driving anyone going slower than you is a moron, and anyone going faster than you is a MANIAC!"

    Pirate Luxe
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And anyone going the same speed as you is just fkn insane!

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    Maartje
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My son was the victim of road rage. 5 cars were hit while he tried to get away from this a*****e. Road rage is horrible.

    td0013
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    George Carlin made the same observation decades ago.

    Jantje Groot
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    George Carlin had a bit on this I think in the 1990s https://youtu.be/1ygT0YnjdX0?si=ZRYzDtkr4D_SHhr3

    Abel
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Road rage? Not fun, and dangerous.

    Lynette Vella
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Says my husband everytime he drives us somewhere. But add horn-honking, a middle finger, and the f-bomb several times. I'm serious. Even to the grocery store five minutes away.

    Jane W.
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    When one of those slow drivers gets in front of me, I call them guardian angels sent to slow me down. That way, I won't kill them.

    somnomania (she/her, queer)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i enjoy going exactly the speed limit (thank you cruise control) and watching people behind me get mad that i'm not going ten miles over the way they'd like to be

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    #17

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    MrsFettesVette
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Same, the Magic Mike ripped physique is nice to look at, but not my thing. Dad bod is way better for cuddling or post-coital snuggles

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    Schmebulock
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Avatar grossed over 1 billion if you need the truth

    Colleen Glim
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ripped physique is too much maintenance. Give me a dad bod everyday

    Iseabail Munro
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The full monty grossed $257.9 million it is literally the dad bod version of magic mike and came out long before magic mike.

    somnomania (she/her, queer)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    and just to be extra clear, people are allowed to find different things attractive, and not everyone likes the same thing

    Rebekah Fuentes
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I can't even believe they were trying to compare "pecs" to "Shreks"! What a disgrace 😤

    Ke Rider
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Live action vs computer animation?

    Amelia Jade
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm a girl (well, middle aged woman) and those muscled stripper bodies do nothing for me. Never have. I am turned off by a lot of muscle. I'm a sucker for Keanu Reeves, was massively in love with Donald Sutherland (even though he was way too old for me) and I crush on a few other celebs. But it should be known that one of my biggest celeb crushes is Chris Farley. Not all women like what you see in Magic Mike.

    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Donald Sutherland was one of the most attractive men in showbiz 🙌

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    Chicken Nugget
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait a HAND model for an ALCOHOL company is 100K!?!?! where do I sign up!?!?

    Spidercat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Appreciate the clarification... I thought they were talking about biscuits 😂😂😂

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    Solidhog
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They misread the job description. It said "Hand jobs for bourbon."

    Vampiresscrow
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just looked it up. Hand models can make an insane amount of money. Geez. Wrong industry.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Your parents are refreshingly polite.

    Ghostpotato
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I saw an interview with a hand model once, she was really well paid but had to keep her hands looking perfect at all times so spent a lot on expensive manicures and hand creams, and was very limited in what she could do; most of the time she wore cottongloves to protect her hands from everyday nicks and scratches.

    Misty Sweet Hill
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just saw a thing. A hand model can make a fairly decent living. As long as you have no schedule and can leave for a shoot whenever they want

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    Now, let’s hear from you, dear reader. How has laughter become a form of therapy for you? Do you agree with the great Charlie Chaplin when he said, “A day without laughter is a day wasted”? Let’s begin a discussion in the comments below!

    #19

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    Alan Jay Weiner
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's on my to-do list. Actually, it's on several of my to-do lists, but most are buried under papers on my desk. Or in the stack of papers on the table. Or maybe on the chair next to my desk. I'll add "look for other to-do lists" to this to-do list.

    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Manday is better, always

    Chilli
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I just gotta wander around aimlessly for *ERROR* minutes and then we can start

    Rosie Red
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then can I cancel at the last minute and ask to reschedule?

    Bill Marsano
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can sell MLS t-shirts: Maybe Later, Satan

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I would but I'm busy this week. I'll get back to you, er, sometime.

    Christopher Rayle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm not available until a month from next Tuesday.

    Loreta
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then ask me again tomorrow... Let's keep playing this fun game

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    Moosy Girl
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then I couldn’t text you because I realised I hadn’t answered your previous text and now I’m just waiting until I run in to you at the supermarket so we can laugh about it and start over?

    Anna Stephenson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or waiting until they t cut you again so you can say "oh- wow- I totally missed that message, when you sent it- only noticed when I sent ent to read the one you sent today!- sorry about that!- maybe my phone's playing up!?"

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    Marianne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I saw your text right away and though it would be weird to reply in the same minute, so I wanted to do it in 10 minutes. Then I got side-tracked and forgot about the text.

    #21

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    Alexandra
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Did anyone notice that both employer and employee use the 'question' tactic to make a definite point?

    Taibhse Sealgair
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Should've replied, "Well they struggled to answer, so Yes."

    Child of the King
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This. I work in customer service and yes I agree

    Tom Faehnle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You also shouldn't say "What don't you understand about about "No Returns"?" lol

    Nancy Higginson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I someone who spent nearly 12 years doing customer service for an online retailer, I 100% side with the employee!

    Sean Stimson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't know the context of the encounter, but that customer was dumb af

    SkippityBoppityBoo
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Asking anyone if they're dumb is not appropriate in whatever workplace setting. I've been asked this over the phone before now and shocked answered "No, I've had Covid and severe head injuries which means that I've cognitive issues especially when you're talking too fast at me. Please slow down and speak clearly because then I'll be able to understand what you're saying"...... But? If the customer was outright rude to you as in using verbally abusive language towards you? I'd probably say that to them too.

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    #22

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    My O My
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't answer video calls. Call when you want to hear my voice, meet up when you want to see my face

    Smol Frog
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't like calls, but you can text me all you want

    Sophia Athene
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I bow to you, my queen!! Or king. Scratch that, I am yours, wise ruler!!!!!

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    #23

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    NapQueen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh, yeah, allotting time to having a good cry is awesome! If I'm sad, I'll give myself 10/15 minutes to cry and then snap out of it.

    Smol Frog
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean.... that's one way to deal with it

    Bonkers & Curious Panda
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is that even possible? If i'm real sad or in pain or whatever makes me cry, I can't stop until I've cried to my heart's content, which is usually until my head hurts and my eyes are swollen and burning

    Loreta
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It works when you have things to do. Schedule your unabated crying for later

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    Cydney Golden
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Holly Hunter's character in Broadcast News.

    Rebekah Fuentes
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yup. I alott myself a certain amount of time for certain emotions and feelings. It's incredibly helpful especially when family is involved.

    SkippityBoppityBoo
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    We all need to cry occasionally... It's cathartic... Helps to relieve what you're going through. You're releasing your own emotions and allowing yourself to feel them...

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    #24

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    Paul Gerrard
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Rule one. Never upgrade and do this to your wife. Thats was the lady beside my wife down the back flying Sydney to New York. I dont think his holiday went well

    Maartje
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Add to that - if the carrier decides to give you an upgrade for whatever reason and not your wife, consider giving the upgrade to her and ask her if she wants it. If you get the upgrade, don't go harassing people in business class to give their seat to your partner, they will think that you are an a*****e a) for trying to get their seat and b) for not voluntarily give it to your partner.

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    Jane W.
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mom has found the way to have a couple of hours to herself. Heaven.

    Lady Vader
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just to be clear, I'm assuming this was the same flight. If so, I think it's a bit mean and revenge needs to be planned!!

    BoredPossum
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Shouldn't you turn off all electrical devices or put them in flight mode?

    BIGSHOT599
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    This comment has been deleted.

    #25

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah! This is the Colombian multicoloured tanager (Chlorochrysa nitidissima). Before googling, I just knew it was a bird. :)

    Rodney McKay
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Take a photo of it from your screen (or, save a screenshot) and use Merlin Bird ID (a free phone app).

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    Nicky
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me when a Japanese man was at a wine tasting and said he could identify the wine. "It's grape."

    Chilli
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like a bird, yep.

    Katherine Forrestall
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wonder if anyone checked out your reply...hmmnnn

    Richard Graham
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    BIRDS AREN'T REAL!!! https://birdsarentreal.com/

    Maartje
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For Dutch people- this is a polinario. Yes, you have to be ancient for that :) Edit to include the link. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89m5lKavIEY

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    #26

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    Zephyr
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's what cat owners be going through, dogs are the best

    Saphyre Fyre
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wrong. I have 4 cats no dogs and I couldn't be happier; I love them dearly.

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    Saphyre Fyre
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's not wasting money. Spending to keep them happy AND healthy. And good pet owners' pets give LOTS of love/cuddles, and attention, and they also do SO VERY MUCH to make our lives better!! TONS of laughs; happy healthy pets are FUNNY!

    ZuriLovesYou
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wasting money? No way! If you're spending money on something or someone you love, then it's not a waste.

    Jaaawn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's not wasting money if it's keeping them happy. I would give my cat the last piece of food over me.

    Maartje
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have 5 ashzole birds and love them dearly.

    Beth Wheeler
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ummmm my dogs and cat ALL do this.

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    #27

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    ColdSteelRonin
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Perfectly reasonable and succinct conversation

    Beth Wheeler
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Haha. You knew exactly what the boss wanted.

    Me. Just Me.
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nope is a complete sentence, just like No.

    Maartje
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A friend just got a texted schedule change from her boss: 4 hours added before when she was supposed to start, and the word "confirm". She felt it was rude. I felt it was rude. Is this the new way of talking business ?? I am seriously asking this question.

    Charlotte
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Unfortunately some bosses really do expect you to drop everything when they snap their fingers. I suspect this will continue until unions make a come-back

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    Matthew Tabor
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I appreciate how gracefully the boss reacted.

    #28

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    Katy McMouse
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wtf?!? Where was this when I was sweatin' geography tests in grade school? I want a do-over.

    ANTIVICTORIA
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Before I saw the response I thought, I will never not know where Kentucky is again.

    Smoke walters
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You are possibly the smartest person I’ve ever met

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I live in the UK, so can manage without this, but would have thought that by the time you'd sorted the 'chef' a couple of times, you'd have Kentucky's location imprinted on your brain.

    somnomania (she/her, queer)
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i feel bad for rich, he probably got made fun of constantly in school with a last name like that, and a full first name more commonly shorted to d**k

    James Monroe
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    did yal not learn who Mimal was in school?

    Dave
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who tf grew up in the US and can't identify every state?

    Anon822209
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Me. I can name them all in alphabetical and reverse-alphabetical order, but I'd likely make a few mistakes if I had to fill in a map.

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    Frank Newton
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looks like the chef from BurgerTime.

    Ur_Fav_Lazy_Panda🫶
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never learned a chef with Kentucky and Tennessee, I learned an army soldier

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    #29

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    Trillian
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But then he needed a SHOE to identify her?

    HTakeover
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't you remember the line from the book? "And the Prince went from house to house, looking for the badonkadonk that dropped her slipper. For he hadn't been looking at her face."

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    ColdSteelRonin
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Have y'all never heard of a bustle? A padded undergarment or wire frame used to add fullness, or support the drapery, at the back of women's dresses in the mid-to-late 19th century. Bustles are worn under the skirt in the back, just below the waist, to keep the skirt from dragging.

    MsPlants
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I heard the wooosh of that going over your head

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    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    From the charming fairy tale, "Kardashiella".

    SkippityBoppityBoo
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh!!!!!!! "How did that get past the censors???"... They were probably in on the joke that they were probably hoping noone else would spot it! 😄

    Nicky
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This Disney statuette was subsidized by the Plastic Surgeons Association of America

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    #30

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    Vinny DaPooh
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lean into the conspiracy theory

    Marno C.
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I heartily agree with this approach. They could put signs above their metal detector scanners saying, "5G Insertion Booths -- Now FREE!" and watch the nutters heads explode.

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    Maartje
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was able to deduce the cut off part of this poster and TIL I can read half letters. "Remodeling the Lizard People's lair".

    Rebekah Fuentes
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't fight the conspiracy. Or the lizard people for that matter. Protect yourself!!!

    ElfVibratorGlitter
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's a great airport though. And freaking massive. I mean obviously it has to be with all the lizard people underground.

    Leah C
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, I mean, it is the Denver airport.

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    #31

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    JinxBox
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These posts seem to assume men can't be sensitive listeners. Stupid stereotype.

    Daggie_style
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Twist is she wanted to ask her friend if she should dump her bf for another guy. This is pretty close to "can I ask you something without you getting upset?"

    #32

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    John Mosley
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not for THAT van, they're way more than 45k.

    Kyle Beswick (Bezzquik)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A van down by the river is waterfront property!

    Daggie_style
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Live in half of a van and rent out the other side

    Lew k
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    45k? Try north of 100k US.

    Neb Skram
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    i lived in a van down by the willamette river now i own a house down by the same river

    Paul Gerrard
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And post vids on utube and make money telling people how to likve like a homeless person

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    #33

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    John Mosley
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I will now be spelling it like that forever.

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    GPawesomeness
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Then comes back looking more awesome than ever!

    EckyThump
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Disappear longer please. She's annoying af.

    TooTrue
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    With a voice like nails on a chalk board...

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    Rodney McKay
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Then, how does she afford all of that makeup?

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    #34

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    badger
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Guernica, that famous picture of a medieval air raid.

    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People in the 1500's would have thought Picasso was insane or possessed after taking one look at his painting.

    Ian Webling
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So he was more than 400 years old when he died.

    TotallyNOTAFox
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One of his most famous paintings is about an aerial bombing raid, that may be a give away

    Parmeisan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is it possible to tell? All I've ever seen of his are kinda-faces.

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    Pittsburgh rare
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Between that and me not being a fan of his work l just ignore him altogether. Been living near the Picasso Museum for a few years now and I still have to visit.

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    Santrikea
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wait....what?? No...what??!!

    Bartlet for World Domination
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, if you never saw a Picasso painting, or any other painting with a rough date, how would you know? Modernism is only obvious if you've seen what came before.

    Ke Rider
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wrongly thought this was common knowledge.

    Dave
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How can anybody be that uninformed?

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    #35

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    Smol Frog
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    usually a bad thing that's funny is only funny to everyone else and not me

    HTakeover
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was working retail one time when a couple came in to look at some expensive electronic. They started arguing about something stupid, like design & I chuckled. Their attention turned to me and asked "you find this funny?" (they weren't upset... yet). I said something like "It's like watching a sitcom. Funny when you see it happening to others but not when it happens to you."

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    Leesa DeAndrea
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can I just get through the day without a fricking disaster.

    Philly Bob Squires
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hmmm... I wonder what this red button does??

    #36

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    Zoey Miller
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have the ultimate definitive proof that the Earth is indeed a sphere: Cats have been on the Earth for 10.8 million years, if the Earth is flat, cats would have knocked everything off the edge of it by now.

    Vampiresscrow
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My homescreen is of Pluto hugging an envelope with a heart on it and a smile upon its face. "Thanyou for not giving up on me." I think it is still a planet.

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    Julie Bradley
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Where are the elephants and turtle?

    Alan Jay Weiner
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If they would only stop reproducing. All stupid people, for that matter.

    Anna Stephenson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They forgot the elephants and the turtle!

    BananaAnna
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The planets are way too close to each other. Rapid absorption is imminent.

    Squiffle Noses
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Night Thoughts...Is there such a thing as a flat-earther who is into astrology?

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    #38

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    Philly Bob Squires
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah, there wasn't a band called Celtic Frost for nothing!

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    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anyone living near a cruise ship stop is gonna have some rage.

    Spencer's slave no longer
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's because a big fat cruise ship full of big, loud tourists is spoiling their view.

    Kris
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Tell that to my 34 square meter appartment.

    Doozle bug
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hate, hell and death are ruining the view

    kansasmagic
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Trade secret: it's mostly an act!

    Mary Peace
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Have they got a very large store-cupboard, or is that boat bringing their food?

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    #39

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    athornedrose
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    he didn't know that yet. he thought he killed his own father by accident and now hyenas were coming for him.

    Marno C.
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OMG, I just realized that there could be a whole like of anti-anxiety gummis with them as mascots like Flintstones Chewable Vitamins but like, for Xanax or Valium.

    Rebekah Fuentes
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Trying to undo the same thing with therapy.

    Katrina Nixon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Those guys seem like so much fun I think I could forget my worries. Plus, if you farted you could just blame pumba.

    Joanne Mendonza-Earle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The Lion King is just a rip off of Kimba the White Lion.

    setsuriseikou
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, rumination isn't helpful, either

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    mysterious(all pronouns)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It doesn't really matter what the rules are, as long as everyone knows what they are and agrees to play by them.

    Mike F
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    House rules! Those folks would be really upset watching us play Monopoly.

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    Passerby
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My house rule is that you can put +2 on +2, so the poor sap that has no +2 or the card of that color needs to draw all the cumulative cards. I think it adds excitement to the game, because that +2 can sometimes explode in the first of the first player if the +2 streaks go long enough.

    Paul Gerrard
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And you can put down more than one...+12 If you dont like it buy your own house to make house rules.But i agree only a 4+ can go on a 4+. A 2+ on a 2+

    Trillian
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I make my own rules. If you complain you have to draw 1.

    PFD
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I've seen this so many times and am always surprised that Uno doesn't know how to play their own game. It's like Chess ruling that you can't promote a p**n or something.

    Marno C.
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How else are you going to make your siblings cry?

    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I invented a solitaire game based on Skipbo while I was in prison. I taught my roommate. A week later, she was trying to correct my play.

    somnomania (she/her, queer)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    watching people play the video game version of uno, i once saw a man have to draw like fifteen cards, explain THAT, uno!

    Bored something
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    House rules UNO. Let the game evolve.

    Farnzy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am a big proponent of house rules.

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    Zoey Rayne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd date someone who struggles with things I am good at and who is good at things I struggle with. Life is hard; balance that s**t out.

    My O My
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nah, that girl is cute and crazy but exhausing

    Bec
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh God, we'd starve to death because we'd never be able to decide on what's for dinner!

    January Tempis
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is the most sweet and wholesome answer I've seen anything in a long time!

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    Cat Chat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My daughter asked me why I don't come running to check on her when I hear her falling down the stairs anymore. I told "unless I hear a blood curling screem, me yelling and asking if she's ok is usually sufficient by now". For clarification, her falls are usually just sliding down on her butt because she runs up and down.

    Panda'sMom
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Most of my friends and my oldest son would be "J". Middle child and rest of friends would be "M"!

    Squiffle Noses
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The one who pushed you is more of a friend of a friend?

    Danish Susanne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am not sure about M but J would definitely not stay in my friend cirkle.

    SkippityBoppityBoo
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mine are - "Omg are you okay?", "Omg what has happened now?" and "Omg you're okay and did the pavement survive?"... Which is why I love them all!!! 😄

    Erjenn Rejano
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm all three, just depends on my mood/who it is

    Anna Stephenson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    4th type "ok well, just die quietly alright!?"

    Papa
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I thought the fourth was "That was funny. Can you do it again?"

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Anyone having this conversation with a lawyer is an absolute idiot. Your lawyer will charge for each message, and each minute. In the end, it won't matter to them if you are racking up their time with your stupidity. They will be making money.

    Trophy Husband
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You can sign anything you like. You can put an x. You can make a symbol. You can sign a different name. As long as you mean it to be your signature it is legal. However, it is to your benefit to make it the same every time and difficult to copy because otherwise people can forget it easily.

    Bec
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I worked in medical billing and some insurance and state insurance would send claims back if the signature was illegible, but one sent mine back because I print my name because I suck at cursive - it was really infuriating because that is how my official government documents are signed, that is my signature. Anyway, insurance will do anything to get out of paying a claim

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    timhood
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm sure this didn't really happen, or this guy has way too much money to burn as his lawyer bills him $325/hr in 6-minute increments. This foolish conversation costing him $20.

    John Monteith
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah good to fuckwith a guy charging you over £200k/(hour

    Yelenda Lawrence-Tahir
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That’s a trap to know his real name don’t fell into it!

    PFD
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Lawyer just trying to unmask the Dark Knight. Doxing isn't cool.

    Jaaawn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And then both parties clapped.

    SkippityBoppityBoo
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This isn't funny. It is wasting their lawyers time. Not only their lawyers but other people who are waiting for that lawyers appointment time. These are legal documents and requirements. Stop being a smarta*se and just sign the dayum things.

    Kris
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is average sitcom funny and totally did not happen…

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    Charlie the Cat
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But how many bananas is 242 d***s? BP censored d.icks

    TotallyNOTAFox
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    30.25 meter if we base it on an average of 12.50 cm per d**k (The human average being between 10 and 15 cm in length)

    martymcmatrix
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    How dare you, I'm 1.81 m tall and therefore well over the 10 - 15 cm you mentioned...wait a minute...this is all about body height, innit? 🤔 📏 🤷🏽

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    Miliukov Oleksandr
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    oh, I see, if you don't want to fall under this stupid useless censorship, write it on a wood plank

    Wolf princess quinn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because WE ARENT EUROPEAN. And don't wanna be

    Bobby
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fellow American here, as tired as I am of the US bashing, they have a point with this. Metric is better in almost every single way. We can keep the Fahrenheit scale though

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    Lady Vader
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Maybe we should get a petition going to have Bored Panda uncensored for a week. It would be utter pandemonium!! 😁

    Keelyn Davis
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    how did they measure that tho...

    WFH Forever
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    and don't forget that a 2x4 is not even remotely 2 in by 4 in.

    Daggie_style
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sure hope that was for the length and not the width

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    Jihana
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    OP definitely has a cat.

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Our dog's tail got trodden on in the pub, not his actual tail, just the hairs thereof. Being a greyhound he jumped three feet in the air and did the greyhound scream of death. The dog was fine in two minutes. The chap who stood on his tail wasn't right for about twenty minutes, and he was persona non grata in the pub for a week.

    Fat Harry (Oi / You)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My daughter stepped on the dog's tail once, many years ago, and the dog still eyes her suspiciously every time she enters the room.

    Bewarethere@gmail.com
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cats. I love mine so much even if she's a s**t

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    Dave
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love this. Say it's Trump and you get up votes. Say the more likely culprit and get downvotes.

    Meami
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The toddler in my life: Me: you have poopy pants. Let's get those changed. Toddler: no, I'm still pooping (20 minutes later)

    Bobert Robertson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    oK, but please send me the link to where i can buy that lawn tractor bag

    Daggie_style
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sometimes you don't figure out that you don't want kids until you have kids.

    Maude Lin
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Why would anyone have children on purpose... that's DISGUSTING.

    MrsFettesVette
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You were that toddler once, and one day you may again be s******g in a diaper

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    #47

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    #48

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    PhaseWitFact
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Soldiers don't stay gone for 3 years straight. They get leave. Likely the pregnancy happened while he was home during leave.

    athornedrose
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    there's always the chance this was in-vitro. he may have known he was incapable and she got the money together for IVF while he was away. gotta have some hope, right?

    Dave
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who tf doesn't get this is a joke?

    Rick Seiden
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Perhaps they had been trying to conceive and were receiving fertility treatments before he left. They can put his "stuff" into storage for later use. Then the wife wants to surprise him, so she goes back to the doc about 9 or so months before he's due to return. Either that or it's not his baby.

    Lee Banks
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My ex was an active duty Marine for four years. I got to see him three times during that period. 100% he could have come home to his own baby that he just hadn't met yet. I get the humor, but you don't always have to be cynical, dangit.

    Yelenda Lawrence-Tahir
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She kept the baby during 3 years waiting for him how lovely 🥰

    ColdSteelRonin
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    He's wearing a flight suit so whatever branch he's in he's not a soldier he's an aviator

    Hiram's Friend
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That way he doesn't have to tell you the way he would in civvies.

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    Stefan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Immaculate Conception perhaps? Or turkey baster?

    Anna Stephenson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh dear ......oh dear! "Lucy- you got some 'SPLAINING TO DO!"

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    Little Wonder
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    At one of my jobs an applicant in his mid 40s brought his mum. He didn't get the job, but that's mostly because he also wore a shirt open to the waist and put his feet on the desk mid interview.

    Kalikima
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Once when I was desperate for a job, I applied at taco bell, and was told to come in for a group interview. I show up at the designated time, and we're all sitting around at different tables, and the interviewer is going from table to table. If noticed over half (maybe 60%?) Of the people there are in their pajamas, or what could pass for pajamas. I figure I'm a shoo in. Nope, didn't get the job. Was told I was "over qualified, and wouldn't be happy there". Showed up to eat a couple weeks later, and two of the pajamas people were behind the counter. They were right, I definitely wouldn't have been happy there.

    Liz Siemens
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not sure why you got downvoted. I can't believe people would show up for an interview in pajamas!

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    Northlander72
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Asked for unreasonable compensation"... like what? More than minimum wage?

    Danish Susanne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yes the person who wrote this forgot to tell us who defined reasonable.

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    Pandasizing World Peace
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I cannot even fathom someone bringing their mother to a job interview. Both mother and job applicant have serious problems!

    Min
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I cannot fathom how this was downvoted.

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    Fat Harry (Oi / You)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And by "asked for unreasonable compensation" they mean "expected to be paid at a fair rate".

    Zoey Rayne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I highly doubt the employee's' definitions of "unreasonable compensation" are actually unreasonable given the cost of living, but everything below that is ridiculous. If college grads are asking parents to accompany them to job interviews, shame on the grads; if parents are insisting on tagging along to their adult child's interviews double shame on the parents.

    Min
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If the parents are insisting and the grads allow it, shame on the grads. They're gown-a*s adults, not children.

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    DumYum
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Worst I’ve seen and it happened several times, a woman coming in looking for restaurant work with her husband/boyfriend there. Always, a sketchy down on his luck control freak. One woman boss actually had the woman follow her into the kitchen so she could ask her if she needed help to get away from him. But she said no.

    Alex Kennedy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Asked for unreasonable compensation” = asked for minimum wage.

    ElfVibratorGlitter
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So that's actually an allowable accomodation in the USA if you have a disability. Maybe stop hating on people who are differently abled.

    Bobert Robertson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had an interview scheduled with a guy who seemed to be about 18. He showed up half an hour late so I told him I would not be interviewing him as I had other appointments scheduled and he didn't meet the time he was sceduled for. 5 minutes later his dad came into security demanding to see me and started berating me for not being professional and wasting his sons time. I told him it was his son who wasted my time by not showing up, and reminded the father I have no obligation to speak to him. He then said it was HIS fault his son was late, so I told him, in front of his son, that he can explain it was HIS poor planning that cost his son an opportunity for a job that would see him earning $42/hour within 3 years.

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    #50

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    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Samuel L. Jackson says to take care of your health, like real men. Including your balls!!

    MsPlants
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    why do you think he says f*ck so much thats his release valve lol

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    Alex Kennedy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As an older man, I need to let you know that somehow it was trained into or beaten into us earlier in our lives, so that the ability just isn’t there. It’s not like I don’t *want* to cry at appropriate times, I *can’t*. Also, notwithstanding the above, I will still cry at emotionally manipulative commercials!

    Jaaawn
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I broke down, lay on my bed and cried for the first time in 22 years years last week. Felt so good afterwards.

    Beth Wheeler
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Who says men can't or don't cry? I can tell you for a fact that they do.

    Abel
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Being an adult. With responsibility.

    setsuriseikou
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So, do their tear ducts just dissolve with age, or is it the responsibility destroying them? Crying is normal. For everyone, at all ages.

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    Maude Lin
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    I wish this were true. We could use far fewer old men.

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    AtMostAFabulist
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is it just me, or does he look like Boris, the Animal?

    Tom Nagel
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You should see Pat's Steaks in Philly in the wee hours

    #52

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    Julie Bradley
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hey - direct, no mucking around, sort it

    Ashlie Benson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or the not-paying-attention version, which is "To Whom I'm Concerning"....

    Spidercat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Noted. Will be freely utilised. 👍

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    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Not really, I mean you have only the management's word for it, and they would say that wouldn't they

    Cat Chat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Nah. That chicken looks happy to me. /jk

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    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Like going down the assembly line waiting to have your head chopped off is not stressful.

    HappyBink
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To be fair, I don't think the chickens know their heads are being chopped off however being clamped to a conveyor not knowing what is happening surely is stressful....😒

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    Natty Tempest
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    These same marketers would say the same for you... They don't mean you aren't stressed, just the environment isn't.

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    #55

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    Little Wonder
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Gotye is still making music, he's just low key about it.

    Susie Elle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This song makes me think about my ex who listened to this emotionally on repeat after I broke up with him for cheating on me three times

    #56

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    NapQueen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I laughed way too hard at this.

    S. Maxudov
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was going to comment about abdomen, but others did, so I'll have to abdicate.

    #57

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    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why is floating backwords crossed out? Its more fun when you leave shore, of course, because of the push-back on your feets. But its perfectly funny to leave the water like that? Oh yeah.. i just rememberd the sand that accumulates 😅

    Brian Herold
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you're referring to the top part of the bottom image, I think he's moving forward on hos hands, feet floating in front of him.

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    K- THULU
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "You can't hurt me with that axe, I've got a cross on a stick....."

    Will Cable
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Iphone users trying to find a power supply when they are on 2%

    Cat Chat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I particularly like the guys sneaking off with the loot.

    Fat Harry (Oi / You)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Pretty sure I recognise this book from school.

    Smol Frog
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think I'd rather the cell phones in this instance

    Slapdash1
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah? Who would you call in the year 900? Viking Mobile?

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    Chilli
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "JEBEDIAH! PUT THAT PAINTING SUPPLIES DOWN AND GO HELP YOUR FATHER WITH THE PILLAGING!"

    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I see a house of god and and a priest tho. Are we going by our definitions, or theirs? Edit : sigh with the spelling

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    Mark
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I was just at Uluru, there wasn't a single cloud in a 500 km radius

    Wintermute
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is legit. Fred Meyer has some of the best sunsets you'll ever see.

    setsuriseikou
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, I do happen to visit grocery store parking lots much more often than scenic locations, so, er... thanks, nature?

    Doozle bug
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Grocery store parking lots looking like the gates of hell

    #60

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    ZuriLovesYou
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What is up with this comment section?

    Sassycat7777
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Agree. I was just really enjoying the cute dog face of the indoor plant and then....

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    BringMeMyDragons
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Keyboardtek making friends again, I see 🙄

    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Tap water is chlorinated. Chlorine serves no function in nature.

    AnkleByter
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I see we skipped our science classes, didn't we? It is literally an essential to life, lmao.

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    BIGSHOT599
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    #disneybelike #plantsbelike #memes

    #61

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    athornedrose
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    amen. fun to do, miserable to start. shout out to those true friends.

    Nolgoth
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I still have the stuff to make those... it's like 30yrs old lmao

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    #62

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    Luke Branwen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Aliens: "Let's do a hologram show over this planet and become their gods"

    PeepPeep the duck
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The ‘gods’ would have to prove to them that will be no weird pěnìs measuring and photos this time round

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    #63

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    RedPepper
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I agree, I know at least 4 boys (ages 6, 8, 10 and 38) who are train nerds.

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    Hi
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well I do drive truck. Didn't decide to do that till I was 23 though. I guess I'm a late bloomer.

    Rahul Pawa
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    For the current generation this is missing Pokemon and Minecraft.

    Zoey Rayne
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    More or less. The 5 year old I look after is obsessed with Godzilla and soldiers.

    Lene
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hmmm.... is my 7yo daughter a man now? She is obsessed about dinos! She says she has 1 big wish in her life and that is to have a real dino as her pet. 🦖

    ROSESARERED
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Forgot golf club, any sports apparel, garden power tools, power tools....this list could keep going

    IrishGirl
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    almost! gotta add trains and firetrucks 🚂 & 🚒

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    #64

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    DudeFortitude (He/Him)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "You can no longer send Direct Messages to this person." - at the bottom

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    Natty Tempest
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If they had said "who's there?" would it have gone different?

    #65

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    Smol Frog
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    recipe didn't say what kind of eggs to use

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    #66

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    NapQueen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And of course I read this aloud in a French accent.

    Cat Chat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's one of those things it's impossible not to.

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    #67

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    Adam S
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Urgh this seems like a lot of effort

    Joshua Russell
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Reminds me of a girlfriend I had who was insecure, extremely jealous and controlling. Life got a lot better without her. The fact that he can immediately unload all the correct responses to that prompt shows he really has been through too much.

    Angela C
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't understand the type of girls who'll ask those stupid hypothetical questions like "would you still love me if I was a worm" and then get all hurt and offended if they don't get the answer they want. It's stupid and immature

    Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As far as I've seen, it's very rare for a human being to turn into a worm.

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    Rebekah Fuentes
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That conversation was exhausting.

    AllRightyNowThen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Knowledge of the maintenance requirements

    Julie S
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "if I was a flower would you pick me?"

    #68

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    BookFanatic
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I did that to my mother's cast iron skillet as a kid. Once. Never again. lol

    #69

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    Crescent 3
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I graduated in '82 as well. So, like me, James is about 60 now. I wonder if he's still chillin'?

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    #70

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    #71

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    Mark
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU

    Zephyr343
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My vet would just put him in one of those nose masks you use for people being put under for surgery

    BringMeMyDragons
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You're vet sounds old school and cheap. This little dude has been given seditives, and likely benzos before this, reducing the risk of general anesthesia and letting him chill

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    Joe Reaves
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Do you expect me to talk?" "No Mr Bond, I expect you to die."

    BTDubs
    Community Member
    1 year ago

    This comment has been deleted.

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    arthbach
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is fairly typical. We shout loudly and show pictures when things are going well. We slink off to a corner, and keep quiet when things are going badly.

    iBlank
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    it's all about the journey they said

    #73

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    Trillian
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "What did you do" or "what do you want" are the only answers that pop in my mind here

    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Except that is being sent by an AI bot.

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    Chihuahua Mama
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Is anyone actually ready to go back to work after a vacation?

    Alan Gale
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Imho, the greatest thing about being retired is that I don't have to use an alarm clock!

    IrishGirl
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't even have to go on vacation........

    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The thousandth time I have seen this on the web.

    setsuriseikou
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I probably surf some other kind of web, since this is my first time seeing it

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    panther
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My answer is "It's going, I won't say where it's going or what it's going in, but it's going" Which I mean to imply that it's going to he11 in a hand basket.

    Katy McMouse
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think there's a designated traffic lane for that destination. Pretty sure I've been on it.

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    Anna Stephenson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd like to add "been better, been worse!" To the list Translation: "It's pretty bad, but I want to keep my rep as an optimist intact!"

    Papa
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My usual reply to "What's going on?" is "I was hoping you knew."

    Sebby's Mama
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Living the dream" is my usual response. Most people understand that the dream is actually a nightmare.

    #76

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    Joanne Mendonza-Earle
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Summer is a season to be endured. We are all indoctrinated as children to love summer b/c school isn't in session. But it's truly a miserable season. Heat, humidity, bugs, traffic, tourists. Ick. I'll take 3 falls and 1 spring.

    Kalikima
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I hate the summer! I live in Arizona, and it's too fùcking hot! It's been 120° for the last 3 weeks, except for the week it got up to 128°!

    BringMeMyDragons
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But... You live in the Sonora desert. There's alot of places in the US that are not a desert...

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    Doozle bug
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Two reoccurring conversations in Armidale NSW, ‘ it’s so hot, I miss winter, it’s so cold, I miss summer.’

    Joseph Dixon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Don't have to shovel heat though.

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    Natty Tempest
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Turned out, he was a commoner... The scandal would have been terrible!

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    #78

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    Fat Harry (Oi / You)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "match". I think you mean "choreographed performance". Let's not pretend WWE is a sport.

    MissMePhoenix
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Just because its coreographed doesn't mean its not a sport. Every routine in olymipcs gymnastics is choreographed, cheers at cheer competitions are choreographed. Do you know how much skill and strength is required to pull off those moves and not accidently kìll the other person? Don't say they aren't athletes when they very clearly are.

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    David Kutz
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    With the Olympics on the doorstep, perhaps gymnastics isn't a sport, because it's a "choreographed performance?" Simone is the GOAT!

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    keyboardtek
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As an Atheist, we call it hedging our bet.

    Fat Harry (Oi / You)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm a gambling horticulturalist, we call it betting our hedge.

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    Robert Benson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But ... how does it "leave"? Which religion does it put in its place? Inquiring minds want to know :)

    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'll be happy going down, knowing i dont have to go to eighter heaven nor hell. I have looked forward to being wormfood and seeing the world at a nucleus level as energy- since before 1 grade 👻

    CrunChewy McSandybutt
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Meh, I just dissociate and pretend I'm on a roller coaster with my latest celebrity crush.

    #81

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    Vinny DaPooh
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The mentally unstable part was redundant

    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm going to need to check on the dogs

    Joshua Russell
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Never mind the rest of it, I didn't get past alcoholic.

    Ed Dart
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Looking for the right person

    BIGSHOT599
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    im sorry but. what was everything before chicken nugget addict?

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    #82

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    Little Wonder
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If I had a spare $70,000 I sure as s**t would not be buying presents for strangers.

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    #83

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    IrishGirl
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I still think I'd prefer to be gaslit than rented...boundaries, people...

    #84

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    Robert Benson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    While the answers are vastly different, they could be easily mistaken for each other if you were in a hurry, especially if you worked it out on paper and saw this as the first possible answer.

    David Morgan
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ah, I see it now. The original is: e (gap) x squared (gap) plus 7 x. The answer was: e (gap) x squared plus 7 x (gap). That is a big difference.

    Puppy Dancing!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This was probably a formatting error

    Carla Phillips
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Someone explain to me why they are different. It just looks like a spacing issue to me

    Alan Gale
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The correct answer is e to the power of X squared plus seven X etc His answer was e to the power of X squared, and the added 7X etc. This would give a very different answer.

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    Michael Largey
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Let's Play Jeopardy! Calculus for $200, Alex. What is the derivative of e to the power of x-squared plus 7x ?

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    Not-a-Clue (she/her)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's me! If I say guess what, my husband just sticks his head in his hands and says "oh god, what now?" 😂

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    #86

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    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She chose the one who did for her, even when he didnt want to, because it was the right thing to do. Thats not not short

    arthbach
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She didn't choose Shrek because he was an ogre. He was the one she became friends with, and love blossomed. She decided against Farquaad because he was a horrible individual.

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    setsuriseikou
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Because yeah, being short is the worst thing about him, mhm

    clairebear
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think she didn't want to marry a tyrant who was ethnic cleansing the country and torturing cookies.

    Cupoftea?
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Actually she chose someone who was on her wavelength over someone who wanted a trophy.

    Khavrinen
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But what about those of us who are ogres AND short?

    ZuriLovesYou
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I don't think this guy ever watched the movie.

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    #88

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    Joseph Dixon
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    They're not good at maintenance actually.

    BIGSHOT599
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    everyone give Italy a good {{slap in the face}} spampton-6...ac5db3.png spampton-66a396fac5db3.png

    Cat Chat
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You're {{not as funny as you think you are}}

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    TotallyNOTAFox
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, coffee is an essential substance for staying alive - what do plants provide that's so important? /s

    Stygtand
    Community Member
    Premium
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What i dont get is that, if you forget to watet a house for a single day, it will die. And yet at the same time, a similar wild plant will dig through concrete and live of what ever water it gets, be it redbull or sewage.

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    #91

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    Slapdash1
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    One week holiday every two years? Jay-sus that's cruel..

    Kimberly Young
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I live in the US and I'm taking my first ever 1-week vacation in September. I'm 37 years old. Please send help; we're not ok.

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    Adam S
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Does this mean a 1 week holiday every 2 years?? Eeep.

    Trillian
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And only if your boss doesn't cancel it last minute I guess

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    Natty Tempest
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Depends if they're seeing each other between hahaa. For me, that's about right with babysitting. Maybe in two years he will be out of our immediate care long enough to have a hug

    Verena
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I am working for an US company which has production facilities all over the world, in the Netherlands. We physically feel the "?!?!?!???" from the US HR departement every time we take our contractual time off: 6 weeks holiday fully paid, sick leave up to two years with the first 6 weeks fully paid, maternity leave, ...

    Puppy Dancing!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    So long as no kids for the weekend or the holiday

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    Not-a-Clue (she/her)
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This makes the assumption I have more than one friend (or any friend for that matter!)

    #93

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    Auntriarch
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Watch "Going out for an English" and decide which character you are.

    Alan Gale
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    12 bread rolls, with some of that yellow stuff

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    La Lucy
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Spanish people and Latinos are also white. Spain, Argentina, Chile have blondes. And white people can speak Spanish too...love surprising ppl with it when they talk shyte about me and think I can't understand.

    PeepPeep the duck
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I love how historically Spain peaked at piracy on the seas, has spread its culture forcefully on others, and the only thing modern people fight about with the Spanish accomplishments is the language in conjunction with Mexico and America 😂 😂

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    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    To hide that we are dead inside

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    #94

    Funny-Relatable

    ykkswb Report

    setsuriseikou
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    11:55, 00:06, 11:50, 00:03. Midnight is 00:00. You're welcome.

    Liz Reid
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    But answers A and C are just before midday whilst B and D are just after midnight.....so it's D.

    Trillian
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If only there was a 24 hour time system

    Wally Mahar
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sorry ya’ll It says “to” one can’t go “to” 12:00 from 12:03 and travel backwards in time. One can only go forward in time that means 12 a.m. the next day, therefore 12:03 is the farthest to 12 am. The answer is 11:55 a.m.

    White Sauce Hot Sauce
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's either A or D, depending on how one would define "Closest" time to midnight. We can't yet go back in time, so 11:55 am would be the closest to the upcoming midnight. If 'closest' means the time nearest to 12:00 am, then 12:03 am would be the answer.

    Zee Fam
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Are we going by the Price is Right rules? Because you have to get the closest w/o going over.

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    #95

    Funny-Relatable

    funny Report

    #96

    Funny-Relatable

    funny Report

    Trillian
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah cool instead of cruel narcissists who want to subjugate the universe let's blame an abused girl

    Spencer's slave no longer
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yup, she lived how she was raised. Abused children, especially in the time the movie was set, only knew one kind of "love" and were unable to feel or give actual love. Jenny was a victim who didn't know any better.

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    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The bathrobe scene was the first red flag, and she followed the script all the way. I did feel bad for her tho, its not easy running away when you dont know how to run.

    CrazyAuntiePanda
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why do all these so called "great" movies have disgusting scenes in them with kids? This one had little Forest mimicking sex sounds after his mom had sex to keep him in school. Couldn't watch rest of movie, just caught parts over the years.

    PeepPeep the duck
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Cos it’s funny 🤣 it’s comedy, it’s wildly inappropriate but on a humorous level to set the scene of the situation and how he saw it. It’s not hard to get

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    clairebear
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You hate her because she behaves like a man.

    ColdSteelRonin
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No, we hate her because she was cruel to the only one that showed her love and kindness and only came back to him when she was dying and needed someone to take care of her and the kid

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    #97

    Funny-Relatable

    funny Report

    Page intentially left blank
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And the cat must have a regular supply of things to knock them off onto unsuspecting victims' heads in the doorway.

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    David Kutz
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Mummified old woman in a rocking chair, looking out the window

    Robert Benson
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    With a motor attached that starts it rocking at random times?

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    NapQueen
    Community Member
    1 year ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Fill the foyer with lava and you got a good game going on.

    Jessica Scott
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'd wall it off, put in a hidden ladder and door, stand in the window at night with a candle, and convince people the house is haunted.

    karen snyder
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A jungle of houseplants with drip lines

    ColdSteelRonin
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Most houses I've seen that have that do a seasonal rotation

    Puppy Dancing!
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I never understood why no access from adjacent bedroom

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    #98

    Funny-Relatable

    funny Report

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    #99

    Funny-Relatable

    funny Report

    Karina
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "I have no logical or reasoning skills what so ever. Hear me roar" 👀

    Joshua Russell
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you "don't speak bike nerd" then you literally couldn't pass a driving test and shouldn't be on the road.

    Justin Shock
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Then why the f*ck are you allowed to have a driver's license? Get off the road, a**hole.

    BookFanatic
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I learned this in elementary school. We had a police officer stop by and set up a whole bike safety course. If we passed it we got (wait for it) a sticker!

    Papa
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Believe it or not, cars and trucks didn't always have turn signals. Sticking your arm out the window like in the picture meant you were turning left. Sticking it out bent at the elbow, with your forearm pointing up, meant you were turning right.

    Natty Tempest
    Community Member
    1 year ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "and those stupid yellow lights on cars... What are they all about?"