This Instagram Page Is Dedicated To Funny And Honest “Millennial Mom Confessions”, Here Are 50 Of The Best Ones (New Posts)
Many parents describe parenting by basically not describing it. It’s magical, indescribable, they say. There can be some stigma attached to honestly venting or sharing the messy and chaotic reality of having kids. But for every tale of exhaustion, kids provide hilarious deadpan commentary for the most mundane things.
Fortunately, this Instagram page gathers the confessions of millennial moms who want to vent to the world about the reality of parenting. So scroll down and enjoy these funny, honest tales about raising a child. And if you want to see some more collections of confessions, check out Bored Panda's other article here.
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I will do anything in my power to make sure my children feel this way because I never did.
As tiny humans, kids are as varied as adults, so parents often find themselves needing to employ a variety of tactics to keep them in check. These styles will, inevitably, vary from culture to culture and will also often reflect the parent's own upbringing. In the American middle class, at least since the end of the Second World War, parents have often employed a more permissive style, which allows their children to feel independent and not constrained by constant rules.
Some of the responses and activities here indicate that the children do feel relatively free and unconcerned. Though kids also tend to not really know boundaries very well, so it could simply be that childlike innocence. Regardless, the permissive style has its detractors, as children often end up with poor self-discipline and tend to lack structure when approaching work and other activities.
In some cultures, it is very common to have full-on discussions with a young child and baby. These discussions do tend to be pretty one-sided, with the parent telling the baby about itself. In West Africa, parents will also talk to their babies, but mostly about other people. In both cases, the child does benefit, however, as engaging with language helps them learn to speak and feel included in family conversations. This is why young children, seeing or hearing a conversation, will join in with their own babel, as they believe this is simply what one does in the situation.
This makes me think of my daughter, then aged 4, who looked at me closely before nursery one morning and said: "Mummy, are you wearing make up today?" And I said, "Yes, actually, yes I am wearing a little bit." And she said, "You need more."
When kids get older, hopefully, they start to develop the ability to actually converse with others. Then comes the inevitable ocean of questions about practically everything. Why is the sky blue? Why are adults bigger? How does a car work? Can dogs understand us? While vital for a child to understand the world around them, this can be exhausting for adults who feel like they are in a never-ending interview. Some cultures circumnavigate the issue by emphasizing observation as the preferred method of learning. In other words, some parents have actually, successfully pulled off ’just sit in silence and watch.’
Others try to preempt the onslaught of questions. This makes sense, as a parent is an authority figure, so if you can’t tell your kid how gravity works, why would they believe you about anything else? In Indigenous American and New Zealand communities, storytelling is often employed to keep kids entertained and to explain to them how the world works. Though a particularly curious kid will probably end up asking hundreds of questions about the story itself, so it’s not a foolproof approach.
Raising four kids, I can attest, sometimes you just gotta take it when its offered from your wife. Dont remind her she has spit up in her hair, or that you just witnessed her clean up some unholy messy something or other. And pro tip for guys: Change the sheets before bed, before being told to... iykyk...
3 days of labour and an emergency C-section and 12 days in hispital after that, 15 days off for me yay...
Grandpa comin' with his toolbox. Takes toy. A few minutes later - Kid running around the house like mad with said (now even louder) toy. Grandpa leaving, smirking at dad, waving at Kid "bye laddy, have fun...Show your dad that funny thing with the horn!"
LOL I can so relate to this. We never lied to them but we did try to screen toys before purchase and if a noisy one slipped through it often became a "only in your room" toy. PRO TIP: When you test a toy for noise don't just listen to what it is SUPPOSED to sound like. Listen to what it does if you relentless spam the button. Some toys have built in delays, some do not. Some years back there was a cute little Elmo doll that would sing a song as you opened and closed his mouth. The ABC song I think but I forget. So cute! Except my grandson quickly figured out if you yoinked it back and forth like you were trying to give it shaken baby syndrome, Elmo's mouth would open and close quite quickly. Elmo had no delay so he sounded like a rapper having an epileptic seizure. It's quite funny for about 30 seconds. After several hours it got really old. That became an "only in your bedroom" toy.
I've lived in apartments my whole marriage. My Dad always lived in houses. My father used to give my son noisy toys like a clock that spoke every quarter hour....a mower that made popping sounds.... The day he gave my son a toy xylophone I said "Oh look! Another toy that can stay here with grandpa so you can play with it when you come to visit." My father said "Why are you keeping it here?" My sister said "Because she lives in an apartment and prefers to not annoy her neighbors with a xylophone at 6 in the morning." My dad finally got the hint and started getting quieter toys like Duplo Blocks.
My mom and former MIL used to buy my children extra batteries and tell them it was for their toys. I cant wait to be a grandparent lol!
As a former child, if my parents did this to me, I would annoy them until they gave the batteries back
So...I did this to my little brother. I was twelve years older than him. So at 4 and 16, *he* was at that age where he wouldn't go to bed without seeing James and the Giant Peach. He's scream, yell, and throw s**t if he didn't get to watch it every night. (My stepmom let him get away w anything lol) Finally one day I pulled it out the VCR, pulled the top back and *snip snip*with some scissors and suddenly James and his f*****g peach are no longer my problem. Looking back I'm SURE stepmom and dad had to have figured out what happened due to it being a clean cut; it clearly wasn't eaten by the VCR. But apparently they too were happy enough to be rid of it that they never said anything if they did figure it out. I still teel zero shame, little a*****e tortured me with that damn movie.
Same, but my mom would just go for a random bike ride in the evening for like 20 minutes by herself.
I've come up with clever ways to hide that I'm swearing. My husbands sees through them and immediately starts laughing.
Because the people that work at those places don't have kids and get to sleep in lol
No dear, their bodies fill themselves with poo until they finally explode
This went for all moms in 80's and 90's movies - dad messed everything up and mom had to clean up the mess afterwards but somehow SHE was the no-fun parent.
When the perky young dental assistant asks if I floss every night, I sometimes have to hold back the manic laughter.
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For some, out of carelessness. For others, it's like a rollercoaster ride - just a long one. Sometimes up, sometimes down, but it can be a lot of fun. Not everyone has to want it, and that's good.
Load More Replies... Where's the one with the kids having a melt down because their food is touching on the plate?
For some, out of carelessness. For others, it's like a rollercoaster ride - just a long one. Sometimes up, sometimes down, but it can be a lot of fun. Not everyone has to want it, and that's good.
Load More Replies... Where's the one with the kids having a melt down because their food is touching on the plate?
