40 Spot-On Tweets About Marriage That Sum Up What It’s All About (New Pics)

Bub, you _danced_ into that one.

Because of Covid my missus has been unable to go to work so she does the house work. If I try to help she gets the right hump! Its not a nice feeling when I feel useless around the house.

It was actually a trap and you just fell for it :)

Does this fall under the category 'open mouth insert foot'?

I seem to have been born with the proper instincts to load the dishwasher in the most efficacious way possible. I can't really claim credit; it just comes naturally. Enough to the point where, when my partner loads it and tells me "It's full; won't hold anything else," I can fit another 8 or 10 dishes in. Too bad that talent's not worth anything on the open market, eh?

My husband of 48 years once complained that "I treated him like a dog". I smiled and told him "No baby, I love my dog".

Maybe he was just dog tired

Lol Puppy's like: I thoguht u talking to dat other person. Oh welll. PET MEEEEEEEEEEE

😂🤣😂😂🤣🤣

I'm kind of glad we didn't have daughters. I'd be jealous. If my husband treated me as well as he has our girl dogs I'd be the happiest woman on the planet. Please note, I've truly loved our "girls" too. But after 40 years of marriage, unless my ears start to flop and I grow a tail, I don't think it's going to happen.

I hope she did it as a joke, otherwise that's weird. Unless it was something they started watching together and he went on to the next episode without her.

Time to set some boundaries

Aww, that is a bit unfair

how dare you watch a show without her!

Stop cheating on her with Netflix then!

I actually gonna marry a man next month who hates laundry and loves washing the dish

I hate the laundry but like cooking (cooking, not boiling macaroni or nuking a TV dinner). My wife hates cooking but doesn't mind laundry. Bonus: she loves mowing the lawn!

The only thing my missus will let me do is clean the windows. Wash down the balcony. Do the decorating (to her standards) and any heavy duty cleaning like the oven.

My husband of 40 years, more so since retirement, likes to "manage". He has a lot of ideas about laundry, dishwashing, mopping, etc. I'm so thrilled to get his input.

Easier said than done!

Oh how I can relate. Out of sight, out of mind.

What a waste- no wonder so much food is bought and wasted, doing no good for our planet

That's such a waste :(

Basically, same 🤦‍♀️

that is such a perfect name. i pull the drawers out and store them somewhere else. ostensibly so i know what i have and use them. in reality, i just watch them die.

The spouse sounds like a jerk. Does he want her to have sex with him when she is not in the mood?

familiar words.

Were you able to put enough spin on the coffee cup to bop him from 3 rooms away?

There is a difference between parent and child and if a parent doesn't know that line, life will be hell.... of course, unless you thought this was funny, but don't expect your child to respect you or do what you say.... and it won't be his fault

I think he means that she doesn't clean her room, when she has a headake.

My grandpa doesn't need lullabies or peaceful atmosphere to go to sleep. He needs the news blaring at top volume for a good night's rest. And if you turn it off, god knows when he's gonna sleep again

True story

Rawr, He tells me.

Because when you change the channel, the volume and the voices change, which wakes the dosing person up

It's a gift :)

I'd even settle for a high fructose corn syrup daddy

Or maybe our two grown sons could pay rent on a regular basis, ideally not borrowing it back before next payday.

s**t

They have good and healthy communication. 😉

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