229 Of The Funniest Tweets From Women In 2016

Love it! XD

Also looks like the cycle of emotions a pregnant woman goes through in 30 minutes 😂

This was my 6 month marriage! ❤

This is one of the smartest observations I've heard or read recently! Great! And I totally agree!

Same

weeks, more like months for me :-D

Nah, not sorry . . . don't care, It's MY mess!

Omg! so true

I would offer to buy her a box of chocolate too! Hehehe

You should have helped her to her car... by the looks of things, she probably would have appreciated it!

Thanks Abby!

"I feel you sister! Go ahead!"

hahahahaha!! Love this!

if he could talk, I bet he would sound like James Earl Jones

It's mufasa reincarnated.

I bet he would sound like Isaac Hayes, and he'd tell you to suck on his chocolate salty balls

Let's face it, THIS cat doesn't need to talk...his stare is all he needs.

I would if any cat told me to

oh, it will still be eaten

I thought it was going to be a woman telling her husband she's fertile! ha haha then I read the punch.

He who hesitates ...

I watch them like a Hawk! Especially how expensive they are

good avocado don't go bad so quick ... you can still eat the bruised parts ... if you don't want it, you can pick out the bruised parts before eating ... or ... maybe u just spent too much time in the bathroom?

😂😂😂

YES! Why is that?

I buy 5 pair and only one fits!

I had tennis shoes and boots. The boots where slightly too big, the tennis shoes where VERY tight. I hate tennis shoes.

That is sooooo true!

Have you noticed it's the same with bras, too!

Anybody else hearing Morgan freeman as the narrator?

I heard Keith Morrison from NBC's Dateline

In my head, I always read the narrator line in Morgan Freeman's voice.

I heard Lemony Snicket from the new ASOUE series

:-D

... and she'll still find something to criticize.

your hair, though

sounds like the visit of Rachel's mom in "Crazy ex girlfriend"

I really don't understand that kind of mother. My opinion is that every mother should love her child just the way it is. Not superhuman child, nor perfect.I don't understand this obsession for "perfection". Is there really anyone/anything perfect around us?

Same with me. Except, it's not my mother, it's my uncle, who is coming here to Australia for a holiday. I know he's going to say something about the weight I've gained over 11 years. I'm trying to lose the kilos anyway. I don't need him telling me that I need to. As for my room, well, he doesn't have to look at it.

Stephanie Ann

Stephanie Ann

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Can't we wait for 2 a.m. when all the men are sleeping?

To the choppa'!

Omg, Little Black Dress, was that a subtle 1D reference?

Jen Kirkman, brilliant! Old joke you might know: What did God say after He created Adam? I can do better.