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As you probably know, unless you live under a rock, Twitter and its newfound CEO, Elon Musk, have been the talk of the town over the past few weeks. Since Elon Musk’s takeover, we have seen everything from high-profile departures to a massive layoff. Last but not least, a whole new verification system that seems to have backfired like lighting a matchstick at a gas station. In a job market more and more made of flexible schedules, work-life balance, and remote working, Elon Musk hit his now ex-employees in the face with a big “nope.”

Countless Twitter memes later, the world is now split into those who believe Twitter’s era is over and those who think the company will be able to make it through this rough patch. We’re no visionaries here, so we’ll refrain from making predictions. But one thing is certain: Tweeters have delivered high-quality comedy over the years, and funny tweets are all we’re here for today.

If you’re looking for a good laugh, this is our “best of Twitter,” a place to come back to over and over again, in loving memory of what Twitter was in case everything goes down the drain. Here we’ve rounded up what we’re positive are some of the funniest tweets of all time — the ones that make us laugh every time we read them!

#2

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

Diamond_Jax Report

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Patrick John Haskins
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1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm pretty sure that the coffee myth has been debunked. In 2015/2016, my wife's OB said it was okay to drink caffeine, but maybe not in excess. Alcohol and cigarettes are still a no-go.

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#4

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

silence__kit Report

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Nathaniel
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why does the alphabet have an order any way? The abc's is not a word, there is not a correct way to spell it.

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#11

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

alextumay Report

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K W
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I love French Bulldogs. Unfortunately they're $4500. I can literally buy a Tiger for $1000 (USD). Blows my mind that a dog costs 4.5 tigers.

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#13

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

Kyle1092 Report

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Nathaniel
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Jerome K Jerome, Three men in a boat, reads the medical dictionary once and sees he has every ailment except Housemaid's Knee.

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#18

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

ahahamina Report

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Headless Roach
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1 year ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Imagine referring to a USB dongle by 'dingle' in a business presentation. Do I take the podium today, even though I stopped before 'berry'?

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#22

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

KeetPotato Report

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JB
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You should see them in the spring when they're let out for the first time of the year!

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Ann M Clinkscales
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And the grass is longer than they have seen since the last time they remembered seeing green grass! They act like it's a smorgasborg!!! Salad for all!!

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Janet Howe
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, that's true. But. The whole floor is their toilet as well.

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VikingAbroad
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Imagine galloping a horse on a cross country path, and it suddenly discovers the ground is covered in food... Yep, I continued...

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Amy T
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm surrounded by cows and haven't even thought of this. This is great.

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censorshipsucks
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

hmm I think if I was let loose in a candy store and told I could eat as much as I wanted, I'd probably eat about 2kg, vomit it up, and stop eating. So... I can see why they'd not be that stoked.

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Artsy Bookworm
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Reminds me of the Chocolate Room in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Yes, I was drooling when I read it

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Aaron Proctor
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They are calm because they know the whole floor is food... Like, a LOT of wars throughout human history could have been averted if we could always simply look down and see either food or a source of sex

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#23

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

laurajlovette Report

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Some black giirrrrllll
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Meanwhile in a parallel universe: Can you imagine how awkward it would be if you went on your pet's phone and found the 1000s of pictures they have of you sleeping.

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#29

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

bugposting Report

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Autistic apricot
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why put it there if you don’t want people to tick it? I hardly think a baby’s going to fill in the list

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#33

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

aardvarsk Report

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stardrop loves you
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Is it just me or are birthday calls the worst. Like srsly I'm trying to enjoy and then my great aunt who I've never seen in my life calls like nooo i wanna eat cakeeeee

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#40

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

sarahschauer Report

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Cara G
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When my dog barks, his bûtthole protrudes a little bit each time. As if he's barking out an ànal Morse code.

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#50

Funniest Tweets Of All Time

Shanehasabeard Report

Note: this post originally had 119 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.

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