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35 People Share The Most Bizarre Situations They’ve Witnessed That Felt Like They Were Scripted
Have you ever encountered a situation where you had to pinch yourself to make sure you’re not dreaming? It’s likely safe to assume that most of us have; from the most random events out on the street or cartoon-like happenings at home, some moments couldn’t have felt more absurdly surreal if they were scripted.
Members of the ‘Ask UK’ subreddit recently discussed such instances after the user ‘Confident_Leg2370’ asked them what was the funniest yet most surreal moment they’ve witnessed in their lives. Their answers covered everything from slipping on a banana peel to watching a person walk their pet pig on a leash, and so much more, so we put them on this list for you to enjoy. Scroll down to find more of their unbelievable stories and make sure to upvote your favorites.
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#1
Sat down on the tube and this bloke takes one look at me, whips out an HB and a sketchpad and starts scribbling away, glancing in my direction every few seconds. Whenever I look over he angles it away from me and avoids eye contact. Every time I look away again he's back on the sketchpad.
At Camden Town he stands up and gets off the train. By now I'm just staring at him. He steps onto the platform, turns around so that he's looking square into my eyes with this look of absolute seriousness. Just as the doors are about to close, without breaking eye contact, he raises the sketchpad. It's me, stark naked, under a palm tree, with an absolutely massive c**k.
Mimi La Souris 2 years ago
it’s funny, this story makes me laugh because it happens to a man and because he seems to laugh at it, but I would have felt bad if it had happened to me.
Lexekon 2 years ago
No phrasing in the story defines the gender of the OP. The subtext implies the artist was looking for shock value, so ask yourself which would be MORE shocking, a man drawn with a flattering physical detail, or a woman with an unexpected and massive add-on?
Load More Replies... Nadine Debard 2 years ago
The first part happened to me, but the girl never showed me her work. Now I'm just thinking she could have drawn me this way... Oh gosh...
Sue User 2 years ago
Nowhere in the post does it say what gender OP is . This makes a difference in the story. ( Yes i could go the original story and it may be there ).
Evan not Hansen 2 years ago
I looked at the original story on reddit and then at that person's account and couldn't find anything indicating gender, though from phrasing they used I'm leaning a bit more towards them being a guy. It would be funny if it were a woman though.
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Phil Green 2 years ago
I burst out laughing at this one! Awesome! I've seen some interesting things on the Underground.
RELATED:
#2
Down in England for a friend's wedding, all the big hotels were super expensive so I booked into a b&b. From around dawn, I could hear a quiet voice outside cycling repeatedly through every swear word in the dictionary. I spent the next few hours in and out of sleep trying to make sense of it, when I got packed up and ready to leave I noticed an apiary. Inside was a parrot who looked me straight in the eye and said 'you f*****g bastard'. Mystery solved!
Hey! 2 years ago
I love those birds! My very proper great aunt had 2 talking birds and they always swore, which made my mother blush and my father laugh - it was his aunt and he was used to the birds.
Gary 2 years ago
I was on holiday in a static caravan with an avery behind it. One of the birds had a habbit of wolf whistling. A woman was walking past the caravan, as I was outside of it. The bird wolf whistles and she gives me the filthiest stare thinking it was me. It was embarrassing at the time but you have to laugh.
Jeremy James 2 years ago
There was a parrot that sat inside the screen door of an apartment that I used to walk past every day. Hundreds of times, it only ever whistled at me. Then, one day, I was walking by and it said, "Little wh*re!"
mhoulden 2 years ago
A couple of years ago five parrots in a zoo had to be separated because they were teaching each other to swear: https://www.theguardian.com/global/2020/sep/29/fowl-epithets-swearing-parrots-separated-after-telling-folk-where-to-go
Caroline Nagel 2 years ago
I love this story so much. It makes me laugh everytime!
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censorshipsucks 2 years ago
hmm except I want to call that bird in the photo something other than a parrot. Cockatiel?
David A Paterson 2 years ago
Call it a ring-neck. I'm not sure if it's an Indian ring-neck or a European one.
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#3
Me and the Mrs just left the Guinness Factory in Dublin and then a baguette just fell out the sky, landed right in front of us… a baguette 🥖
Brocken Blue 2 years ago
Yup! A bird definitely went for the whole prize and lost it. Poor birdy ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My! 2 years ago
I could go for being attacked by a baguette about now, particularly one loaded with butter.
MadameMalfoy 2 years ago
Kinda off topic, but the Guinness Factory is so cool!! I’ve been twice and the top floor always blows me away
#4
I saw a pelican scoop up a chihuahua in Australia and swallow it. The lead was handing out of it's mouth, whilst a little old , very Australian lady tried to beat it with her purse.
It was very surreal.
Rosie Red 2 years ago (edited)
I wish I hadn't read this. It doesn't sound like he tried to help the old lady.
PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago
If it flew off there really isn’t anything you can do, if it waddled for a bit while nonna was bashing it, he didn’t really need to intervene
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Oskar Hauser 2 years ago
Yeah, that would have been the moment where I got internet-famous for ripping open a pelican with my bare hands. Sorry, bird. But no one is eating my pet.
Zedrapazia 2 years ago
Given that the pelican ate the Chihuahua without chewing, it was sure still alive and you'd have at least a minute of time until it suffocates. Since the bird is trapped with the leash, it only has the choice to either remain in place or spit the dog back out. If it refuses to do so, squash the damn bird on the ground (birds have thin bones to fly, you could probably break the neck with ease) and shove a hand down its throat to pull the Chihuahua back out. A hand is less thick than a dog, so if it fits down, so will the hand. Victory for the Chihuahua owner!
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GB 2 years ago
@Mashmelo OMG! We call one of our cats "Chubbles" (as an alternate name)! I've never heard or seen that word uttered/written before. Is that a common name where you're from?
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Moosy Girl 2 years ago
Ok I watched the video of a pelican eating a pigeon and it took a loooooong time before it managed to actually swallow the pigeon, so for my own sanity I’m going to believe the dog was just in its beak and got pulled back out by the lady.
Kiaya Thompson 2 years ago
Having recently seen a video of a seagull eating a squirrel, this stuff is traumatising!
SheHulk 2 years ago (edited)
There are videos of cows eating chickens! VERY surreal!
Load More Replies... #5
I legit slipped on banana peel.
When my kid was around 1yo, we went to my parents house. My wife and mom were giving him banana. Peel was on table and he was waving his arms when he saw me and somehow he threw banana peel on ground from table. I didn't saw it. I was walking past the table to get into kitchen and slipped on the peel. I fell down exactly how it happens in cartoons.
Jennifer Lias 2 years ago
When I was about 6 I stepped on a rake and the handle got me right between the eyes! Like a cartoon.
LavenderHippoInAJar 2 years ago
I slipped on a peelless banana once! Someone had just peeled a banana and dropped it on the ground (IDK why) and I legit just stepped on it, slid, and collapsed. It just always feels ironic that I slipped on all of the banana but the peel.
Miranda Small 2 years ago
I work in a daycare, and there was part of the banana peel one of the kids missed the garbage. Went down and messed up my knee. They are slippery!
#6
Was in Asda doing some shopping when some lad dressed as a clown zooms past riding one of them tiny little motorbikes, being chased by about 10 members of staff. He tries to go around a corner and down an aisle but because he’s absolutely caning it, he skids and crashes into a shelf. Then he gets up and runs out, leaving the bike behind. What was nearly as surreal was that most of the other shoppers didn’t even seem to notice or care what had happened, people were just stepping through the wreckage casually taking items off the shelf.
Another time I was on a pub crawl, about 7 or 8 pubs in we get to a really rough pub. Bloke comes in wearing a pirate hat with a parrot on his shoulder and orders a drink as the parrot repeatedly shouts ‘c**t’. Nobody says anything. Must be a regular because nobody even batted an eyelid. Bought my drink, went into the beer garden, spot my mates at a table and there’s a Shetland pony stood next to them.
Jo Jones 2 years ago
Patrick the Pony was an unofficial mayor of Cockington in Devon and ruled from the Drum pub. I am not even joking
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
Lmao this is something my brother would do (especially if he knew the word c**t, he'd figure out the rest easily XD)
#7
I think it was during lockdown, I was feeling rather glum about the whole thing, when suddenly some bloke on a bicycle with about 20 mirrors on it rode past my window with the theme tune from Airwolf cranking out of a speaker and I just died laughing.
He came past every day after that, then just as quickly as he appeared, when lockdown ended I never saw him again.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
I wonder if it's the same guy that has appeared as one of the 'vehicle mods' posts on BP
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
I saw a garbage truck drive through an intersection and the guy on the back did like a broadway kick and giant bow with his arm out as he swung around the pole. Still can't decide if I imagined it
#8
Cycling along last week, I saw a vicar park his car, get out and trip over the kerb, falling flat onto his face into the grass verge. He didn't put his arms out, or even register that he was falling, just smoothly transition himself from vertical to horizontal in a perfect arc. It was hilarious.
cerinamroth 2 years ago
Maybe he thought Jesus would catch him. I guess God works in mysterious ways.
Jennifer Ness 2 years ago
My mom (50 at the time) and I (30 at the time) dashed across a busy street when there was a break in traffic. She caught her foot on the curb. Because she'd recently been through a long recovery from shoulder surgery, her instinct was to raise her arms to prevent injury from landing with them beneath her. She must have made a sound because I turned to look at her. In my brain, time slowed as it will on occassion. What I saw was her inexplicably flying horizontally, Superman-style then stopping abruptly midair and dropping -- like Wiley E. Coyote after he runs off the cliff. It made a sickening thud when she face planted in the grass. I stood in shock unable to process what I'd seen. Thankfully she was fine. We laughed like loons after the initial shock wore off.
Cactuar Jon 2 years ago
I saw this once, he was wearing helmet and with his carers (full grown man) just very gracefully fell backwards, arms by his side, landed like a plank. Then just got up and continued on his way
#9
Said it before, will say it again.
3 wheeler driving in the middle of a forest, with no driver, playing the X-Files theme tune.
This was 25 years ago now, whoever you are, and however you did it, it was hilarious and I've not forgotten.
Jennifer_Crowley_Luci 2 years ago
Love this! That's a pretty great memory that won't ever leave :D
#10
Was sitting on a bus in Nth London stuck in traffic,looking out the window. Across the road I see a guy with a white cane making his way along the pavement, everyone giving him space. Coming the other way is another guy with a white cane . In slow motion I see exactly what's going to happen instinctively I shout "look out" (off course they can't hear me, I'm on a bus) everyone on the bus turns ton looks at me thinking im a loon, while I watch these two blind guys walk right into into each other. I still wonder how the following words between them went .
Ty Stratton-Quirk 2 years ago
"I'm terribly sorry; I didn't see you!" "That's quite all right. Neither did I!"
Hey! 2 years ago
I said that to someone not too long ago. The guy (probably around 6'5") looked at me dumbfounded and then started laughing really loud. I'm 5'...
Load More Replies... That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
London's a very busy and loud place
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#11
Saw a traveller with no top on ride a horse with a rope around its neck down to a Greg's opposite a bus stop whilst I was waiting to go to work one morning. He tied the horse to a lamppost. Popped in to Greg's. Came put with bag of x4 sausage rolls. He ate one. Gave the other 3 to the horse and then jumped back on and rode off into the misty morning.
mYst17 2 years ago
Instructions unclear, currently riding and feeding my bestie sausages
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glowworm2 2 years ago
I learned recently that horses could eat anything if allowed to. There is a concerning video where a horse eats a baby chick.
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PeepPeep the duck 2 years ago (edited)
traveller as in random person or UK traveling people? Cos if it’s the second, then the scenario makes sense.
#12
During COVID lockdown in the UK, you were only allowed to go out for a short amount of exercise per day to try and curb the infection rates. That is, unless you had a pet that needed walking, in which case you were allowed more time out of your house.
This lead to some interesting interpretations of the word 'pet', and in my town there was a dude who used to walk a fully grown pig. With a collar and a lead.
Zedrapazia 2 years ago
To be fair, a pig can be a nice house pet and it does need walkies. However, regarding the lockdown the funniest pet I saw being walked was a ball python.
Yvonne Dauwalder Balsiger 2 years ago (edited)
(edited - thanks Vic 😅) Here's hoping that at least someone had a good time during covid lockdown, this pig going out in town and a bunch of introverts each staying at their own place in peace.
Sami-Jo Ross 2 years ago
One of my best friends has a pig. His name is Carl and he's very mouthy.
Dragonbeard 2 years ago
Indeed! I came across some dude with a massive monitor lizard round his shoulders on a walk through the park. Good times.
Little but Fierce 2 years ago
Fun but not true. The Covid rules here in the UK said one walk a day, but there were never any restrictions on how long that walk could be and it wasn't policed so it's not like anyone would know, and you could also go outside to go shopping and for other reasons. I think this is probably an urban legend, or someone who just happened to already have a pet pig.
#13
I once saw a dude trying to carry a comically big piece of mdf into the church he was fixing up. I don't know why he thought he could carry it on his own. He was staggering about and trying not to fall over or drop the board. He finally managed to get through the gate and his trousers fell down. It was like a scene from a cheesy '70s sitcom or something.
_mentally_insane_(he/him) 2 years ago
What’s MDF? Moderate diarrhea flu? Missing dog flyers? Maybe dead fish? Must drink Fanta? Marty dated Fran? Married demon friend? Messily dark freedom? Melted dingo flavouring? Missile doesn’t fire? Medium dry filter? Mom deals fentanyl? My dead followers? Millions died filing? Many drowned flamingos? Mister Donoghue farted? Maybe don’t feel? MacBook dials fax? Melon definitely fed? Madly dreamy farmer? Mysteriously dumb fellow? Maximum density freights? Mean domino fair? Male dale fail? Mealy drake fairy? Modified Delaware fingers? Manitoba dowry farm? Mossy door fog? Mabel Dipper Ford? Mini diaper fear? Minivan duels F150? Market dilemma fixation? Mixed dna follicles? Millipede doom fox? Magic day fratboy ? Monday do Friday? Meow doorbell fücker? Mix dix fix? Mawkish domestic fun? Most dope frog? Manly double floor? Muddy dual face? Misty dollop fibreglass? Maw daw flaw? Murder delivery food? Macro doll feeler? Mixtape deadline flow? Miniature duck funeral? Merely demonic failures?
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 2 years ago (edited)
Medium density fibreboard, although I prefer 'miniature duck funeral' 😂
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#14
My partner and I got a lil fluffy Pomeranian in lockdown, and she had an uncanny ability to find bread when we took her for a walk. One week she’s finding a full slice of bread every time we take her out, she’s tiny so a slice of bread is massive compared to her body. And every time we have to yank it from her mouth and carry on. On the last day of the week she’s found her slice of bread as usual, so we snatch it from her and turn back around, then turn to look at her a few seconds later and she has a tortilla in her mouth.
#15
We were in Wales at a fayre. There was this bloke wandering around with a parrot on his shoulder. A bloke walks up to him and said,
"Excuse me, can you tell me about your parrot?"
Parrot man just looked at him and said,
"What parrot?" And then walked off.
Us and the bloke just stared at each other, all making sure we'd just witnessed the same thing.
Featherking 2 years ago (edited)
Could have been the brother of Duck man. Duck man never figured out about the duck on his head either. Completely normal otherwise, as all fellow Pratchett readers know, but it was always better to not mention the duck. Wouldn’t do any good anyway; he had no clue about it.
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Chewie Baron 2 years ago
Spelling fair with a ‘y’ always means they think more people will come!
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
What an odd question, did he want a dissertation? What do you want to know? I might answer a question about a pet but I’m probably not going to stand there and describe them to you.
#16
Police stormed the barbershop and arrested my barber mid chop wtf.
We called it the police interception cut 🤣
Kelly Scott 2 years ago
Police Interceptors! The British version of "Cops". My favorite episode was when the helicopter crew filmed the cop going over a wall but the cameraman couldn't make it. All you saw was his torso on top of the wall and his legs going a million miles an hour trying to push himself the rest of the way over. I thought I'd die laughing.
Jeremy James 2 years ago
"Our local barber got arrested for selling drugs. It's crazy. I've been going to him for years and I never knew he was a barber!"
#17
I came across a guy who was unconscious on the pavement at 2am. While I was poking him a man comes along with a bottle of wine in his hand. Looked like a young professional. He just asks in the calmest voice "Is he dead?". I said no, he said "that's a shame". I was like "do you know him?" and he said "no". So I asked him why he wanted him dead and he responded in the same calm voice "because it would be interesting".
Then he started saying "let's rob him". I was like wtf no and he insisted saying "there's no cameras", I'll split the money 50:50 with you. Honestly felt like I was in an episode of Peep Show.
The conclusion of the story is that he claimed it was the wine talking (didn't fully believe him but ok) but to his credit he did wait for an ambulance with me.
EP 2 years ago (edited)
Title “things people think while drinking but don’t say out loud”….. usually
VioletHunter 2 years ago
No decent person would think that either sober or drunk imo.
Load More Replies... Penguin Panda Pop 2 years ago
The number of boderline psychopaths/sociopaths that walk among us is truly terrifying.
Sue User 2 years ago
I read this as: the drunk person is some hapless office worker who turns to alcohol and is deperate to do something / anything to break the endless monotony and banalness of their life. Maybe I am just projecting.
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Mycroft1967 2 years ago
Was in Madison, WI during Halloween. One of my dorm mates went out dressed as a blue M & M. He proceeded to get very very drunk and passed out on State Street (basically a pedestrian street where no cars are allowed), The police were called, and they hauled him off to the drunk tank. I asked what he remembered. He said he remembered the person who called the police screaming "OH MY GOD- he's BLUE."
TTorrest Author 2 years ago (edited)
I was thinking Better call Saul, myself, actually.
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#18
Sitting outside a changing room in a department store, waiting for my wife to try on clothes, an old man sitting opposite me lip synced the whole of Whitney Houston’s “Greatest Love of All” to me whilst winking and smiling occasionally.
Penguin Panda Pop 2 years ago
TIL that Whitney Houston recorded "The Greatest Love of All'. In my mind it's a George Benson song. I lived throughout the entire 80's. Apparently it was a big hit for Whitney. Somehow I missed that. Just shows how clueless I am.
#19
In a similar vain, I can remember visiting a small, and rather dull village with my family. For whatever reason, I chose to sit outside a shop while the rest of my family went in. As I was sitting around I watched a Batmobile speed through this rural town followed by two police cars. I had a hard time convincing them it ever happened.
Littlehand 2 years ago
I live in a tiny Wisconsin city and we used to have a guy who dressed as Batman and rode his Bat Motorcycle on occasion. He was very serious and devoted to his role. I'd see him on the freeway sometimes. He rode off into the sunset years ago.
#20
Riding the Tube up to a Gig in the early 90s and saw a dishevelled looking bloke eating a Tin of Peaches by tipping them in his mouth, the Train lurches and his Glass Eye pops out and lands in the Tin, without a moment of hesitation he reaches in the Tin, fishes out the Eye and wipes it on his Coat then shoves it back in his Eye Socket.
Captain Kyra 2 years ago
Finding out that most false eye wearers wet the eye with saliva is a fact that I will never forget.
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Heather Talma 2 years ago
What's with All the Random Capitalization? Are we on the Island of Lilliput?
Upstaged75 2 years ago
??? Peaches are a fruit. You can eat them whole, like an apple, or have sliced pieces of them out of a can. Why does that confuse you?
Load More Replies... #21
Four completely naked men ran past rather fast carrying a huge blow up banana between them the size of a canoe. Believe they were students but not sure what that was about.
Deborah B 2 years ago
Hazing, probrably for a rowing team, the giant banana would be a stand in for the boat. There is one ritual I've heard of where they have to carry the "boat" to the canal, all get on, propel themselves 100 yards without oars or paddles, then pick up the kayak and run back to the boat house. All while naked. About half the hazing rituals for men joining UK uni sports seem to include naked running. Generally the runner gets a choice between underwear and running shoes. My younger brother was on the rugby and the rowing teams, and tells me that you should always choose shoes.
Little Mandy Moo 2 years ago
But equally yes, it could be a university sports club, my ex was in the hockey club and they did silly s**t
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Samsquatch & Monko 2 years ago
I suppose they wanted to inflate their own ‘bananas’ and needed a cheap model
#22
My Grandad was adamant when he died he didn't want a hearse, he had his own business and loved old trucks, fork lifts etc.
He was driven to the crem on the back of a pick up truck, people in the street couldn't believe (neither could I). One woman was staring so much while still walking she walked straight into a lamp post. We couldn't contain our laughter in the cars.
hitex 2 years ago
Was he in a casket, or just Weekend at Bernie's it on the back of the truck?
Amy 2 years ago
Awesome, no matter the answer, but I know which one I want to see xD
Load More Replies... Hokuloa 2 years ago
A great aunt of mine was notoriously frugal. When doing end of life planning with her family she refused to indulge the exorbitant urn costs for cremation. She insisted and wrote into her will that her cremated remains be placed in a Chinese takeaway food container for service and burial. She was definitely unique
Argle Bargle 2 years ago
They really got to start making lampposts more visible, for the love of geese
Upstaged75 2 years ago
There's a running gag on Peppa Pig where one of the police officers (a panda) always walks in to a lamppost and can't figure out how it got there. Then the other (a squirrel) puts a sticky note on it which says "dangerous lamppost in workplace environment." I learned a lot about British humor when I had a toddler. :)
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#23
A man fall down a few steps on the escalator on the tube, then proceed to stand back up and beat the escalator with his umbrella shouting A**E! A**E! A**E!
To this day my partner and I still say A**E A**E A**E if something goes wrong
Tess 2 years ago
My brain has no way to read the word other than in Father Jack's voice
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MellonCollie 2 years ago
Wouldn't that be how Elon Musk calls his kid when dinner's ready?
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#24
At the end of October 2000 there was torrential rain and floods. Driving slowly through Purley I saw a woman at a slightly lower level than the road pushing a buggy through floodwaters that were so deep the child in the buggy only just had his/her head and upper chest above the water. Neither seemed perturbed by this; they were just nonchalantly gliding along as if it was a summer stroll, creating a small wake in the water behind them.
Dr Robert Neville 2 years ago
I have a Purley story. Walking home from Croydon after a night out around 2am on the Brighton road just outside Tesco, 2 cars come tearing towards me on the other side of the road, first car stops, 4 guys get out, second car pulls up behind it, 4 guys get out, they start arguing, they're all deaf, it's utterly silent and they're all shouting at each other in sign. The anger portrayed with sign language was fascinating, you could almost feel the impending violence. Then they all just got back in and drove off again. Totally surreal.
#25
I love Americans, but they are some of the weirdest people in the world. My dad worked for an American company, so we used to go over to the US a lot for these 'corporate getaways.' One time, we were at a restaurant eating dinner, and a father and son just came and sat down with us. Just joined us at our table like we were best friends. The son was maybe six or eight. I was confused, so I said something like, 'Can I help you?' The dad then said, 'Yeah, my son wanted to sit with the Europeans for dinner!' It was so strange, but I wasn't even mad, because the dad had balls as big as melons to just brazenly join a random family for a meal to make his son happy.
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
It's amazing how otherwise intelligent people will take one experience and extrapolate a bunch of BS from it, isn't it? "This one American did this so all 332m Americans are weird." It's like concluding all Europeans are rude after that one Italian guy was rude to you.
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Let’s Be Kind 2 years ago
I have to say, I think ALL countries have weird people in them. I’ve lived a long time, I’ve never seen this happen in the US. But kudos to the man for being willing to go on an adventure with his son, and kudos to the Europeans for being willing to play along.
Michael Ruggiero 2 years ago
Really depends on the restaurant. If it's cafeteria style then it's normal.
#26
Not the craziest but It’s the middle of summer and I hear Christmas songs blasting outside, look out the window and see santas slay absolutely tearing it down the street with a massive stereo system in the back and about 4 guys just standing up in it with beers in hand singing and shouting .
David Jeffery 2 years ago
Wouldn't be unusual at all here in Australia, as Christmas is in summer time
ʇɐɹlıɯɐɥ ɔıʇǝɥʇɐd ǝl 2 years ago
no but i was so confused bc i was like "but christmas is in summer???" AND THEN I REALISED that this was prolly in the northen hemisphere
Nicola Roberts 2 years ago
15 - 20 years ago I was on holiday in St Lucia (those were the days) and I saw Santa in an all in one red bathing suit wading in the sea. My only regret is not getting a photo. We're not talking Fred Claus we're talking Richard Attenborough quality Santa!
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
I’m trying to imagine what this person meant even if they had spelled sleigh correctly.
#27
One summer at a music festival I was sitting with a group of friends, all laughing and having a good time. Rather animatedly my friend stands up to add emphasis to his story and gets hit on the head by a low flying toy drone. This knocks his stride for story telling off and as we all fall about laughing at the moment a dog does a wee on his trouser leg. I still laugh to myself randomly when I remember that day. All too funny.
Rebelliousslug 2 years ago
It’s always fun when someone’s bad day is your really funny one, as long as they can laugh with you
Vera Diblikova 1 year ago
When I was girl about 15, I was at horse parkour, all dolled up. I was before grand tribune, sole, only me and lo! a little dog came to me and.... The whole tribune laughed. I cried.
Load More Replies... Jennifer Ness 2 years ago
I, too, will occassionally randomly laugh outloud to myself when something reminds me of any of the many ridiculous situations I've found myself in. Perhaps I'm one of the weird Americans seen by the European poster!
#28
I worked in retail, many moons ago.
A man walked past my shop, placed his backpack down on the window ledge and threw up into it. Right into the bag. Zipped it up, put it back on his shoulder and walked off.
He did this three times that I saw, my colleagues saw him doing it a couple of times too.
George D 2 years ago
That's so weird you couldn't even pitch it as part of a movie script. Implausible
Alexej Dvorak 2 years ago
It would however be great as a minute background detail you see years later in a "10 things you never noticed in movies"-video on YT or something.
Load More Replies... cerinamroth 2 years ago
I did this a few times when I was pregnant with my second. Plastic bag in the handbag - got pretty discreet about throwing up and carrying on with my day while feeling like absolute shite.
Jennifer Ness 2 years ago
Perhaps going through chemo or something similar but he had things that needed to be done
Caroline Nagel 2 years ago
Maybe the guy was sick and nauseous, on his way to the doctors and put a bucket or a plastic bag in his backpack as not leave a trail of vomit all over the street. Just a theory.
#29
Late at night on the streets of Norwich there was some domestic argument happening with a drunk couple and a young police officer trying to calm the wife down, the husband was across the street with I presume his mates. The husband suddenly screams and comes running across to the wife only for the tiny copper to spin round and put him on his a**e in two seconds flat by wrapping her arm around his head and spinning him to the ground, the wife decided to stick a cheeky boot in his stomach for good measure whilst shouting “you d******d”, the wife and the police officer (both women) keep talking while the crippled husband gets dragged off by her colleagues. I was eating Donna meat with chips and witnessed the whole thing, hilarious what you see outside of the clubs late at night, can’t say I miss it much.
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
Where did Donna come from? She popped up suddenly, having her meat eaten, with no introduction, and I’m confused.
#30
Came across a totally naked man dancing cheerfully up the middle of a tiny residential street in a nice area at about 4pm one weekday afternoon. That was a bit strange!
As far as totally surreal goes, I once went to the local leisure centre, for a nice dip in the swimming pool. A woman I'd never seen before decided to stop next to me and tell me her boyfriend licked her shingles, and before I could decide if that was some kind of new euphemism, whipped half her swimming cozzy off and showed me the rash.
I was just like... WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. F**K???
Alexej Dvorak 2 years ago
Seems like public pools get some people talky. Some years ago, when I was just making laps, a lone kid pranced around the side of the pool, and when I reached the end of my lane, he walked up to me and just said "I have an iPhone X". Lol, ok kid, good for you.
#31
Many years ago I used to work night shifts at a data center in a town in Nottinghamshire, it faces a medium sized car park surrounded by houses.
It's Wednesday in August and about 4 ish in the morning and out of the office window I see loads of car lights come around the corner and a group of largish SUV type cars roll round I immediately think have I missed an appointment in the calendar as its not totally out of the ordinary to have customers come fit large amounts of kit at stupid hours.
However these 4 big cars pull into the car park opposite and some lads get out and pop the boots open and start hooking wires up between the cars. color me intrigued at the point so I sit and watch as it looks like they are connecting some AV kit together speakers and amps etc, this takes a couple minutes then boom!
Music starts there are disco lights I s**t you not and suddenly there is a mini rave with 20 ish people dancing away, all the surrounding house lights start coming on and curtains start twitching understandable as its a Wednesday at 4am, as suddenly as it starts it ends they switch everything off yank the cables and jump in and drive off.
I just sort of sat there for a bit and then went to make a strong as f**k coffee and splash cold water in my face to make sure I hadn't dreamt it.
#32
I once had a man come up to me looking all menacing with a small group of other menacing men behind him and say to me "Ya seen ma bird?" I had just arrived into the pub and had three pints in my hand. I replied "no, sorry" to which he pulled a dead bird out of his pocket and said "well ye have noo" and he and his mates were there pissing themselves laughing whilst I felt like a right twat thinking I was about to get my head kicked in.
Another time I was walking to work and a topless woman ran outside of (what I assume was her house) threw a man's shoe full of what I think was talcum powder at a passing work van and ran back in.
Vic 2 years ago
Some people are obsessed with aligning talcum powder in a straight line with a card.
Load More Replies...
#33
Pre-covid, I worked in the busiest part of CBD. I went out for a coffee, and as I was waiting at the intersection, a man on rollerskates suddenly appears in front of a huge line of cars. He proceeds to gracefully attempt what looked like an ice skating routine, backwards, whilst holding up 4 lanes of traffic.
#34
A married couple joined a society I'm in, came along to a few events then vanished. A few months later they were back and the husband seemed to have this renewed interest in the club and hobby. I was completely oblivious to the whole situation so asked him "hey Adam, how's that project going?" Welp... it wasn't Adam. His wife had left Adam after a DV incident and started seeing his IDENTICAL TWIN BROTHER and brought him along to the club instead. No joke, it all got a bit Coronation Street. Also there was the time I was driving into a housing estate and just over the rooves of the houses in front of me I saw a load of vans go wizzing past at high speed, backwards. Freight train going past on an embankment.
Jennifer Ness 2 years ago
Were you honestly not able to figure out what was meant?
Load More Replies...
#35
Leeds festival, 2002, Sunday night, observing a line of riot police advance on two people off their tits wrestling each other in sumo costumes behind someone dressed as Chewbacce breakdancing as fireworks went off and portaloos took flame and exploded.
Weirdly beautiful.
Oh, and a b*****d on my uni course who thought he was proper ‘skater’ despite being a private school kid from Cheltenham, leaping up to try and grind on a hand rail to have his deck snap in half on connecting with the pole. Made me laugh for a long time.
cerinamroth 2 years ago
I'm from near Leeds and now live in Hamburg. We have regular May Day riots here, especially in the socialist part of town where I used to live, and when they kicked off one year (molotov cocktail flew right over my head!) we decided to move away to a bar we knew away from the action. It was a bit much for a friend who was visiting and she was a little tearful. While we were sitting outside with our beers and she started to feel a bit calmer, a gaggle of riot police in their Ninja Turtle gear came jogging past towards the scene. She said "Hallo" to them and one of them stopped, waved at her and smiled and said "Hallo! Viel Spaß in Hamburg!" (Have fun in Hamburg!) - he must have overheard us speaking English so knew she was an out-of-towner. She said she felt calmer after that. We also got locked in until the water cannons had moved on at about 2 a.m.
Caro Caro 2 years ago
Wait, you guys got locked in .... in a bar? weeeeeeee LOL
Load More Replies... Huddo's sister 2 years ago
The second one is extra funny to me, because I know Cheltehnam and can fully imagine someone from there thinking they are better than they are!
That Goth Demon (zey/zem) 2 years ago
Thats definitely something that would happen in Leeds lol
#36
I was once in a Starbucks, early 2000s, sitting by the front window, enjoying my drink while reading and people-watching.
After some time, it having been a quiet afternoon, my attention was suddenly drawn to a peculiar-looking figure coming down the street.
As he approached, his face looked oddly disfigured, and he was wearing a very unusual 80s-style red leather outfit.
I was utterly shocked when he went by fully, and I saw he was wearing a*s-less chaps.
I chalked it up to one of those days and thought no more about it.
Maybe a year goes by, and I’m watching channel four, back when it was cool. It’s a tv show I’ve never seen, and lo and behold, I recognise the location. Then I remember that day, the guy, the face, the rear end.
It was Bo Selecta, specifically a Michael Jackson bit.
Suddenly it all made sense.
Christos Arvanitis 2 years ago (edited)
All chaps are a*ss-less. If they have an a*ss, then they are called... pants.
#37
Not very funny but surreal, unexpected and quite sad.
I was out walking with my parents on a Sunday night through our town centre after being out for something to eat.
Flock of geese were flying overhead, one of them somehow flew into a lamppost at top speed and went plummeting down to the ground.
We all looked at eachother and went to see what state the goose was at.
It was pretty sad seeing how injured it was, it survived for a minute (looked like it's neck was broken and was paralyzed) before it died, the lamppost was rattling away for ages. My dad turnt and said 'Anyone know a good butcher?'
We had no idea what to do so he picked it up and used a local help button on a information board. Ended up leaving it underneath for someone to come and collect
Argle Bargle 2 years ago
Dad jokes aren't ever great with their timing, but this one hits hard. Not as hard as a goose, but still hard
hitex 2 years ago
I think taking it to the butcher would have been the most respectful way to honor it's death..particularly if meat was then donated to hungry.
Nicola Roberts 2 years ago
I'm not sure goose is a popular as it was in Dickensian times?
Load More Replies... What do you think ?
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
I once returned from a six-week trip to discover my beloved podiatrist had had a stroke and died. We usta swap naughty jokes. Was at his wake and spoke to his wife. Told her how I’d come back with a lotta jokes to tell him. She asked me to tell them to him. Um, what? She said it would make her happy because he’d loved me and my jokes so much, and would I please do it? So there I am, chrysanthemum in hand, telling dirty jokes to a corpse in a coffin. I kept looking at her, like “You really want me to keep going?” She’d nod, so I’d tell the story about the hooker. Just kept slogging through. It’s the weirdest thing I’ve done in my life, and I hope never to top it because my head might explode.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 2 years ago
I was riding home from work on my bike about a month ago and I saw a guy playing a piano in the middle of the street. A real full sized piano. Then again, It is Portland, OR so I've seen weirder, this was just the most recent.
SkyBlueandBlack 2 years ago
Yeah, you have a guy dressed as Darth Vader riding around on a unicycle playing flaming bagpipes. You don't get to call a pianist in the street weird!
Load More Replies... Wooly 2 years ago
Had a side gig as a paranormal pub tour leader - Had a group of people in from Florida who’d see the Portlandia show and wanted to come experience our quirky city….As we mad our way along the tour path, we had to stop and let ~ 8-10,000 naked bike riders pass … I asked if Portland was living up to their expectations and got resounding laughing nods all around ..!
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
I always think how much it would hurt to ride a bike naked
Load More Replies...
Robert T 2 years ago (edited)
Many many years ago, when I was a student, we had been to some gig and were travelling home on the train, and the train in front brought the overhead power cables down, leaving our train without power. Train didn't move for several hours and it was getting a little chilly. Someone in our carriage decided it would be a good idea to do a conga down the train. So we got up and joined the conga. We conga'ed the entire length of the train as far as first class. Then we all turned around and conga'ed our way back to our seats. That must've been so surreal for anyone else on the train. LOL
cerinamroth 2 years ago
I think that's marvellous! I used to dance (ballet) for many years and I have to admit that I once turned piqués all the way down a train carriage when I was the only one in it and finished with a double pirouette. I felt so silly I giggled all day.
Load More Replies... cerinamroth 2 years ago
The weirdest thing that happened to me was being mistaken for Natalie Portman when I was visiting the Chocolate Hills in the Philippines. A group of women just kept following me around and asking me if I was her, and if I was Jewish (I am, but do not look anything like Natalie Portman, sadly!), and could they have their picture taken with me. So shocked was I that I agreed. I wonder to this day if there is a group of Filipinas showing my picture off to their friends of the day they met a famous actress, before the friends pull up a picture of the real deal online and they all realise how wrong they were.
NY Redneck 2 years ago
I was making a delivery to a private club in Manhattan and got there early, they hadn't opened yet so had about an hour to kill. Took a walk up the block to grab some food and on my way out of the deli I see a midget(white M 40'ish with grey dreadlocks) on rollerblades, wearing childrens overalls with a carebear on them. That had me chuckling already. Then I saw what he was doing. He was blading past women in skirts and would pivot on one foot and do a 180⁰ while he looked up their skirts from behind before skating past them again. After the initial shock/disgust wore off, I saw him skating towards another woman and yelled across the street at him to stop being a pervert. He panicked and tried to skate away as fast as he could, but was too busy looking to see if I was chasing him and not paying attention to where he was going. He looked up just in time to skate face first into lamp post and knock himself out cold. Instant karma in my opinion, but hilarious to watch.
Libstak 2 years ago
Not me, my niece. On a train with her friend as it's pulling out of the station she tells her about the dive bombing magpie that kept attacking her on the way to the station. They were passing the spot on the train so she points out the windows and says it happened right there. As they both looked at the spot this poor elderly lady suddenly ducks and waves her hand bag around her head trying to shoo off the nose diving magpie attacking her. It got alot of laughs in that carriage from the fellow passengers who had over heard and looked out at the right moment too.
The Doom Song 2 years ago
Riding my bike home from work at 2am, in the middle of winter, saw a guy butt naked walking down the street playing with himself. Looked straight at me and started laughing. As you could imagine I got the hell out of there as fast as I could!
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
We were in westwood California and there was a guy laying in a field just jerking off
Load More Replies...
Mrimion 2 years ago
My Dad and I were driving home from work one day. As we take our usual path we notice a little red ball rolling down the road towards us as were coming up over a hill. Of course we expected to see someone so I slowed down as I was the one driving. However as we cleared the hill. There was no one. No person or children anywhere....
Captain Kyra 2 years ago
I was doing yardwork and discovered that stepping on the tines(is that right?like on a fork?) truly rockets the pole of the rake into your face just like in cartoons. I had to laugh while I rubbed the lump on my forehead.
Binky Melnik 2 years ago
I once returned from a six-week trip to discover my beloved podiatrist had had a stroke and died. We usta swap naughty jokes. Was at his wake and spoke to his wife. Told her how I’d come back with a lotta jokes to tell him. She asked me to tell them to him. Um, what? She said it would make her happy because he’d loved me and my jokes so much, and would I please do it? So there I am, chrysanthemum in hand, telling dirty jokes to a corpse in a coffin. I kept looking at her, like “You really want me to keep going?” She’d nod, so I’d tell the story about the hooker. Just kept slogging through. It’s the weirdest thing I’ve done in my life, and I hope never to top it because my head might explode.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 2 years ago
I was riding home from work on my bike about a month ago and I saw a guy playing a piano in the middle of the street. A real full sized piano. Then again, It is Portland, OR so I've seen weirder, this was just the most recent.
SkyBlueandBlack 2 years ago
Yeah, you have a guy dressed as Darth Vader riding around on a unicycle playing flaming bagpipes. You don't get to call a pianist in the street weird!
Load More Replies... Wooly 2 years ago
Had a side gig as a paranormal pub tour leader - Had a group of people in from Florida who’d see the Portlandia show and wanted to come experience our quirky city….As we mad our way along the tour path, we had to stop and let ~ 8-10,000 naked bike riders pass … I asked if Portland was living up to their expectations and got resounding laughing nods all around ..!
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
I always think how much it would hurt to ride a bike naked
Load More Replies... Robert T 2 years ago (edited)
Many many years ago, when I was a student, we had been to some gig and were travelling home on the train, and the train in front brought the overhead power cables down, leaving our train without power. Train didn't move for several hours and it was getting a little chilly. Someone in our carriage decided it would be a good idea to do a conga down the train. So we got up and joined the conga. We conga'ed the entire length of the train as far as first class. Then we all turned around and conga'ed our way back to our seats. That must've been so surreal for anyone else on the train. LOL
cerinamroth 2 years ago
I think that's marvellous! I used to dance (ballet) for many years and I have to admit that I once turned piqués all the way down a train carriage when I was the only one in it and finished with a double pirouette. I felt so silly I giggled all day.
Load More Replies... cerinamroth 2 years ago
The weirdest thing that happened to me was being mistaken for Natalie Portman when I was visiting the Chocolate Hills in the Philippines. A group of women just kept following me around and asking me if I was her, and if I was Jewish (I am, but do not look anything like Natalie Portman, sadly!), and could they have their picture taken with me. So shocked was I that I agreed. I wonder to this day if there is a group of Filipinas showing my picture off to their friends of the day they met a famous actress, before the friends pull up a picture of the real deal online and they all realise how wrong they were.
NY Redneck 2 years ago
I was making a delivery to a private club in Manhattan and got there early, they hadn't opened yet so had about an hour to kill. Took a walk up the block to grab some food and on my way out of the deli I see a midget(white M 40'ish with grey dreadlocks) on rollerblades, wearing childrens overalls with a carebear on them. That had me chuckling already. Then I saw what he was doing. He was blading past women in skirts and would pivot on one foot and do a 180⁰ while he looked up their skirts from behind before skating past them again. After the initial shock/disgust wore off, I saw him skating towards another woman and yelled across the street at him to stop being a pervert. He panicked and tried to skate away as fast as he could, but was too busy looking to see if I was chasing him and not paying attention to where he was going. He looked up just in time to skate face first into lamp post and knock himself out cold. Instant karma in my opinion, but hilarious to watch.
Libstak 2 years ago
Not me, my niece. On a train with her friend as it's pulling out of the station she tells her about the dive bombing magpie that kept attacking her on the way to the station. They were passing the spot on the train so she points out the windows and says it happened right there. As they both looked at the spot this poor elderly lady suddenly ducks and waves her hand bag around her head trying to shoo off the nose diving magpie attacking her. It got alot of laughs in that carriage from the fellow passengers who had over heard and looked out at the right moment too.
The Doom Song 2 years ago
Riding my bike home from work at 2am, in the middle of winter, saw a guy butt naked walking down the street playing with himself. Looked straight at me and started laughing. As you could imagine I got the hell out of there as fast as I could!
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
We were in westwood California and there was a guy laying in a field just jerking off
Load More Replies... Mrimion 2 years ago
My Dad and I were driving home from work one day. As we take our usual path we notice a little red ball rolling down the road towards us as were coming up over a hill. Of course we expected to see someone so I slowed down as I was the one driving. However as we cleared the hill. There was no one. No person or children anywhere....
Captain Kyra 2 years ago
I was doing yardwork and discovered that stepping on the tines(is that right?like on a fork?) truly rockets the pole of the rake into your face just like in cartoons. I had to laugh while I rubbed the lump on my forehead.
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