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Honesty is the best policy. But not if you're sick or injured, apparently.
Reddit user Theedriplomat recently asked doctors to share the most obvious lie a patient has ever told them, but the thread quickly gained traction and received responses from nurses, paramedics, and other healthcare workers as well.
However, we don't mind it. The stories, each more ridiculous than the next, highlight a big problem: whether out of embarrassment, fear, or simple confusion, people are making their cases far more complicated than they could be.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Not a Dr, but a nurse of 20+ years. If a person is lying to you, I absolutely let them & am unbothered because they’re telling me what they want me to know about themselves.
If there is a lab or test result I need to base my care around the result, I rely on that result to give me the information to safely care for that person. If the result returned is the opposite of what a person is telling me, I know there is a deep shame, medical-based stigma, or defense mechanism in place for the person receiving care. Medical settings are not safe spaces for everyone. Let people lie. They’re going to do it anyway to protect themselves. It often tells you what you need to know and there is never a reason to shame anyone seeking care.
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#2
Not sure if this counts, but while taking a new patient’s history back in 2011, he told me he was in a band.
I told him I was a musician as well. He got all excited and started to talk more about the others in his band. They were none other than The Beatles. He spoke of all of them in present tense, too.
It was a sobering moment. I never would have known he was Schizophrenic if I hadn’t asked him about his hobbies. Not up until that point, anyway. ❤️.
These stories are by no means outside the norm. In 2018, two nationwide surveys of 4,510 US adults were conducted, and eight in ten respondents admitted they have not been forthcoming with their doctors about information that could be relevant to their health.
The people who were more likely to conceal the truth from their doctors were women, younger patients, and those who rated their own health as poor.
#3
Dentist here! The man that owns the nail salon across the parking lot is my patient. Every 6 months I ask him if he smokes cigarettes. Every visit he denies it. And yet every day I watch him from my office - smoking a pack of cigarettes 🙃 Sometimes I wave 👋🏻.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 2 months ago
Why do people lie to their caregivers? It makes no sense to me.
#4
I’m a physician and I have a colleague that had her prescription pad stolen. A pharmacist later called her to ask about a prescription she had apparently written: “MORFEEN, 1 pound”.
#5
"I've been following my diabetes treatment plan"
Sir, your toes are falling off and your a1c is 14.
Current-day numbers are likely even worse, as the public trust in physicians and hospitals fell from 71.5% in April 2020 to just 40.1% in January 2024, according to another nationwide survey from the United States.
Some doctors reportedly "fire" patients after the first lie they notice. But if we as a society don't address the underlying causes, the cycle of secrecy and poor communication is likely to continue.
#6
"I didn't drink"
Sir your blood alcohol level would k**l a normal man and I can smell you from across the department.
Also you fell over twice trying to stand up.
#7
I am a Medical Laboratory Scientist. I am the guy who plays with all the stuff your mother told you never to touch.
One day, a Labor and Delivery patient drops in and decides to have her baby. She had no prenatal care. The nurse draws her blood and sends it to the lab. I do a type and screen (Blood type and Rh). We do this on all patients because lab people are paranoid. Patient tests as A Positive; in the computer her history shows B Positive. I send the Phlebotomist to draw her blood because lab people are paranoid. Still A Positive. I dive into the history and, yep, two years previously, I was the one who typed her as B Positive.
This time, I draw her blood (because lab people are paranoid) and let the nurses know there is a blood bank discrepancy, call the physician. We can't give her type specific blood if she needs it, we will have to give her O Negative and start an investigation. (Blood types don't change except for very rare circumstances.)
As I am retyping her for the third time, (still A Positive), the nurse calls me, laughing. Our mama to be was admitted under her sister's name. She had stolen her sister's Medicaid card instead of getting one of her own. She didn't want her folks to know she was pregnant.
Laserleader 2 months ago
Dangerous habit to lie for medical assistance. Im O- and if I pretended to be one of my siblings I would have a 1 in 6 chance of surviving a transfusion.
#8
Nurse here but I had a patient who claimed he had seizures. When he was having a “seizure” I went “I don’t know what give him to stop it” and the patient replied “fentanyl” while shaking.
#9
My roommate from college works some hours in the ER and people still come in all the time claiming they slipped and fell a*****e first on [insert object].
I would think in 2025 this would be a thing of the past. You can literally order butt plugs online and have them shipped directly to you with no one knowing. There's no reason to keep sticking household items up there when we have so many things specifically designed to go in a butt.
#10
I had a guy who had a lymphoma, came in not feeling well. His liver enzymes were trash, he looked like death, he was tachycardic and his blood pressures were very borderline. He kept telling me he felt fine and would be fine going home. We spent all day on the phone back and forth with oncology and infectious disease and the worry was that his lymphoma had transformed to a more aggressive type. Overnight his blood pressure tanked and he went to the ICU (for my medical people, his overnight lactate was 12). He wouldn't let the overnight resident call his family because "he was fine." He died the next day. Very, very sad case.
If a doctor asks to call your loved ones because they're worried about how sick you are, believe them!
#11
NAD, but I work IT in a hospital. I had a ticket to replace a keyboard in an ER and got chewed out by a Dr. for response time (I was actually as prompt as possible for my part)… as I was working I overhear the same Dr was making small talk boasting about this and that when a nurse came in and explained some test results for a patient the Dr. had which proved that the patient wasn’t lying about being sober and actually having some concerning results.
The Dr laughed about it and said he assumed they were lying and drunk because they were so sloppy… and it was not said in a funny way, but a demeaning way.
All I could think about was how much I hated that if I were that patient I would hope the Dr would believe me when I said I didn’t drink but that my seeming drunkenness was worrying symptom. It scared me a bit.
Na Schi 2 months ago
This post exactly describes what the nurse in the other post is saying: a medical setting is not a safe place for everyone. I have no difficulty to imagine that people who have been treated by such a doctor, might refer to lying in the future about certain circumstances to protect themselves and their dignity.
#12
Not my case, but my mothers(we work together, we're both dentists). She starts extracting a tooth of an elderly lady after thougroughly going through what medication she takes, any chronic conditions, etc. She asks her if she takes any anti-coagulants(blood no stop if taken). Nope. She doesn't take any. Any Aspirin? Nope, no Aspirin. So my mum extracts the tooth and now the wound won't stop bleeding. My mum asks again about anti-coagulants, specifically. Nope. After 30 more minutes of this and an X-Ray to check if there were any root fragments left in the socket, the patient, now distressed that she still won't stop bleeding says something along the lines of "Maybe I shouldn't have taken (insert anti-coagulant brand name here) this morning". And that's, Reddit, is how I learned to suture wounds.
#13
Not a doctor but a former vet tech. The number of people who would swear to me up and down that they don't do d***s and there is zero chance their dog could get them...while their dog is obviously h**h on pot.
"Well, we do have this *potpourri* that is pot scented..."
Listen, for one: no one wants a pot scented air freshener. Two: I don't give a s**t, I just need you to tell me what it was so we can treat your pet. Three: maybe ease back on the w**d so you stop leaving it where your dog (and probably children) have access to it.
#14
Remember kids: tell the police nothing, tell the medical professionals everything.
Linda Lee 2 months ago
Nope, not if your insurance is through your employer. HIPAA is supposed to protect you but large companies just pay a fine and call it the cost of doing business if they get caught. They usually don't because the employee can't prove it. Source: I work for a company that sells insurance.
#15
I'm not a doctor, but a friend of mine works in an ER in Mormonville, Utah. Weirdly, per his stories, a lot of 110% heterosexual men will walk through their kitchen with no pants, slip on accident, and fall onto a cucumber that has lube on it! It's really weird, tbh. I'm not sure how cucumber accidents keep happening to ***definitely*** straight men with wives and kids.
Jokes aside, there is nothing wrong with gay or bi, ***and***!!!! nothing wrong with being a straight man who likes toys in the a*s. Please, just use something meant for a**l. Cucumbers are not meant to be put in any hole other than your mouth.
PirellisMiracleElixer 2 months ago
If you can’t be honest with your partner about what you’re into, you’ve got bigger problems. Buy a designated toy, or at least find something with a flared base!
#16
I've had a lot of pain that has landed me in the ER. I've been treated horribly at times. It's crazy when I tell them that intravenous toradol normally helps a lot, if I haven't had it recently. Toradol is a non-narcotic. I've never felt a mental effect (other than relief) from it. It works like an instant anti-inflammatory and just eases the pain significantly. I've had drs scream that I was " d**g seeking, and they weren't going to give me anything" change to " oh sure" when I mention toradol.
Upstaged75 2 months ago
It's unfortunate that drvg seekers have tainted the appropriate use of pain killers for those who need it.
#17
Me: Do you smoke?
Patient: No
Me: But you're left handed, yeh?
Patient: How did you know that?
Me: You have tar stains on the fingers of your left hand.
Upstaged75 2 months ago
There's no good way to hide the fact that you smoke. Trust me, no matter how much perfume or whatever you use, we can STILL smell it. You've just gone nose-blind.
#18
Can I chime in but reverse? I had just had a baby and was recovering in hospital, and when bubs cried she would do this really h**h pitched scream. I’d get random nurses and doctors come in throughout the day asking me if I smoked, or had alcohol much while pregnant, or if I drank too much coffee? Asking how was I feeling? Checking my vitals? Really random questions. Finally a midwife came in and lo and behold she was my childhood friends mother! We had a chat, she cuddled my baby, she heard bubs scream cry and looked at my chart and laughed. She told me babies with such a h**h pitch scream are normally the ones suffering withdrawals. They thought I was a user of something 😭.
Laserleader 2 months ago
Serious issue in the NICU I stayed in. Some mothers never even came back to claim their babies, others had to be investigated before the baby could be released into their custody, and for some that meant they lost custody.
#19
My sibling is a doctor and told me of a time a girl was very obviously faking seizures, and when another doctor said she was faking it she stopped mid-"seizure" and said "NO I'M NOT".
#20
“I was just standing on the corner minding my own business when someone drove by and blew white stuff in my face. THAT’S why I tested positive for c*****e.”.
#21
The doctors I work with will ask if patients are taking their medication, they say yes, and once they’re under anesthesia the dr says “they never filled the prescription”.
Ray Ceeya (RayCeeYa) 2 months ago
In the USA medicine is really expensive even with healthcare.
#22
“I never smoked like ever in my life”
….and you’re sure they smoked a cigarette literally like 10 minutes before you came, cause they smell like an ashtray and they have really really bad PVD.
#23
Not a doctor but I imagine any doctor who works in a clinic that treats STDs has had a lot of married men claim to have gotten an STD from a public restroom toilet seat.
#24
My cousin is a doctor, he said a very obviously pregnant girl came in with her mom, she was 5-6 months along. When asked if she ever had sexual contact, she said no lol
Edit : her stomach looked like she was pregnant. Doctors have a list of questions they need to ask to be sure about diagnosis like are you sexually active to rule out other disorders and tumours. This is only funny because they sent her in for an ultrasound and saw a baby.
#25
Patient in with endocarditis, had PICC line. Found in the bathroom with an empty syringe and a fentanyl baggie. Room searched and multiple syringes and fentanyl baggies found. Started crying, "Why would my boyfriend bring this in?? HE KNOWS I DON'T USE IT. I didn't use it!".
#26
I once lied to to paramedics because I really didn’t want to go to hospital, they asked if my pupils are usually different sizes and I said yes in the hope they’d say “oh never mind then, bye”
Anyway they absolutely did not believe me and took me in to be checked for a stroke, what I was actually having was a Hemiplegic migraine.
Surralvampi 2 months ago
Those are horrendous. I get them once in a blue moon. I’ll be talking to my wife and she’ll say, smile babe. And then, yup your droopy one side, go take your tablet.
#27
Kid came in nearly dead from diabetic ketoacidosis and one of the parents said they had ran out of his insulin 24 hours before
Later the other parent confessed they hadn’t given their child insulin in over a week.
#28
I am a nurse who worked in a male juvenile maximum security facility. I purposely placed a bouncy ball on my desk. of course it was irresistible to the kids coming down for sick call. most all would claim pain of 10/10 on the pain scale, but they just couldn't help themselves in spite of having a broken hand, jaw, finger, shoulder, arm, migraine, broken leg, etc. they would always pick up the ball and start playing with it. all the ailments were magically healed by the powers of the amazing bouncy ball.
#29
Am GI.I was at the pub having lunch and next to me was a guy 5 or 6 pints deep. I vouched for a sour ale he seemed unsure about. He ordered it. Still drinking it when I shook his hand and left.
Afternoon, I walk in to my exam room and that guy is sitting there.
Me: "oh hey chief, I met you at [X pub] earlier!"
Pt: "wasn't me."
Me:"I told you [X drink] was great. You ordered it?"
Pt: "wasn't me."
Found it odd but skimmed the chart a bit (we don't get to do it beforehand sometimes) and figured out quickly why he was lying: referred to our hepatologist for evaluation and mgmnt of his alcoholic cirrhosis. Office scheduled him with me accidentally. Had indicated to the rooming nurse that he was sober for 6 months. I apologized for the scheduling mix up, but warned him it was a bit pointless to lie about his alcohol intake. He still lied at his rescheduled apt with the correct provider. Oh well, it's his liver not mine.
Upstaged75 2 months ago
Hope he doesn't need a new one. Because that will disqualify him from being put on the transplant list.
#30
“Your skin is really dry today, I’m worried that’s what’s contributing to your itchy skin, what lotion do you use?”
“Oh I use *this brand.* I just didn’t put it on today”
(As I try not to breathe in the snow of dry skin flaking off my patients legs)
Seriously yall. Regular lotion use will save your skin. I can’t tell you how many patients I see daily for an itchy rash on the legs due to dry skin.
pineapple87 2 months ago
I seriously don't understand men who think it's somehow emasculating to use moisturizer. A colleague new to the country once asked me if it was normal for your skin to feel tight and itchy in the winter. I said yes, but moisturizing regularly will help with that. His response was "oh no, I'm fine, just wanted to know if it was normal"
#31
Pregnant woman squatted on the floor in front of me. Peed on the floor, stood up and told me her waters had just broken.......ummm, no? You just Peed on the floor?
#32
Was a provider in a rural area urgent care. Guy and girl come in complaining of bug bites. They are covered in open sores.. they deny d**g use on social history. I ask, “do you use illicit d***s?” Denied.
Ok. Tactic changed. “Listen, I don’t call the cops on people who use. Can we start over?”
Them “m**h”.
You don’t say.
#33
Worked for a d**g research clinic.
We told guys a blood test will be done, if you have any illegal d***s they will show up. Don't waste your time, if you have used d***s just come back in a week and be clean. No penalty, no judgement, you just need to be clear of d***s for a week.
A full 75% swore “no d***s” yet the test results showed that was a lie.
OhnoI’vebeencensored 2 months ago
This story is much more interesting if you imagine that the censored word is dícks
#34
Pharm tech here.
“I take that every day!”
B***h please, we haven’t filled that prescription in 6 months, and it was a 1 month supply. Don’t lie to your pharmacy. Trust me, most of us are NOT judging you. Concerned? Yes. Judging? Dude, it’s your health. If you have a stroke bc you haven’t taken your blood pressure meds or lose a foot because of untreated diabetes… there is only so much I can do to help you.
On the opposite end, re: any controlled substance- “I only take it as prescribed! I am out of it!” You’ve gone through a 30 day supply in 20 days. No. It’s too soon, and I’m not filling it for cash. What you need to do is have an HONEST convo with your Dr about how you’ve been taking it, because clearly the treatment plan isn’t working.
#35
I'm an Occupational Therapist and one of my clinical rotations was Inpatient Psych. I would do Grand Rounds every Wednesday with our Psychiatrist, Resident and 3rd year Med Students. We had a patient who would wait outside the door of our meeting room and the minute the door c*****d open; he would throw himself down and violently start "seizing". We got so used to it (as it happened EVERY Wednesday) all of us would politely step over him and say things like "Hi Kurt, nice day" "Kurt you aren't getting anymore Klonopin today" "You might wanna stop that, buddy, it's probably going to make you sore". After we had all stepped over him and gone back to our respective jobs, he would calmly pick himself up off of the floor and act like nothing had happened. Typical psych ward behavior, I'm told, but as a student it was so bizarre and eye opening.
nomnomborkbork 2 months ago
C'mon BP--censoring "the minute the door c-racked open"?? That's absurd.
#36
Paramedic responding to a man unresponsive on the street. Pinpoint pupils with a syringe hanging out of his arm. Narcan administration wakes him up like magic. “I don’t do d***s!!!”.
Lady Chelsea (LadyChelseaoftheVoid) 2 months ago
"really, sir? cause your body certainly does!"
#38
More than once someone in my office called for Mr. X. Mrs. X was the one who answered the phone and basically said “I’m the wife so you can talk me.” Mrs. X was not on any consent and HIPAA was explained. Mrs. X said to hold on then comes back on the phone using a deeper voice and says “this is Mr. X.”.
#39
Call came by ambulance stating that the patient called 911 after his abdomen spontaneously exploded. Arrived with a gaping hole in his mid abdomen. Quick x ray showing 1,000 shotgun pellets in his belly. His significant other shot him and he thought lying about it would keep her out of trouble. He lived and she went to jail.
#40
Go work in the ER and you’ll realize that anything is a s*x object if you’re brave enough.
#41
My dad told the Doctor with a straight face that he loves walking and he walks daily despite actually being bed ridden for the past few months and when he could actually stand just sits on the couch to watch TV. I understand lying but not something so blatantly untrue and easily verifiable.
Papa 2 months ago
In the last 8 months or so before my mother died she would tell me and my sister that she was fully cooperating with the physical therapists. The physical therapists told a completely different story. I don't know if she was lying or delusional. Knowing her it could have been either one.
#43
That he "fell" on a bushel of apples...for the 2nd time in 2 years...
When radiology read the scan, they said the "tumor has grown in the interim." We informed them it was an apple in the r****m...they asked how he swallowed it whole...I wish I was joking.
Lady Chelsea (LadyChelseaoftheVoid) 2 months ago
"we've never met a man who was part snake before!"
#44
NAD
Me: Hello sir, I’m calling to cancel your upcoming elective surgery with us due to your current Covid infection.
Him: I don’t have Covid, I’m fine. I’ll keep the surgery date.
Me: Let me look at this note in your chart. Looks like it’s a televisit with your primary doctor from this morning about your cough and positive Covid test.
Him: ….
#45
I fell on it.
Upstaged75 2 months ago
Yup - I was gardening naked, slipped and fell, and the cucumber just went right up there! Crazy huh? /s
#47
Asked a patient if he had type 1 or 2 diabetes, he said “idk doc it’s so bad it might be a 3 now”.
Debby Keir 2 months ago
And the lack of basic understanding of the condition shows that he needs information as well as treatment.
#48
Back when I was a med student, I was on an ER rotation with this older guy who came in and claimed to be having serious abdominal pain. Barely touching his stomach would send him into a screaming rage of pain.
The attending asked him to stand up. He gets out of the bed and acts like he’s in severe pain. The attending asked him to jump. So, he starts jumping up and down. Then the attending looked at me and asked “you ever see someone with an acute abdomen be able to jump?” So yeah, this guy was a known pain pill seeker.
I’m sure I have more, but immediately thought of that one.
#49
As a dentist.
"doc i didn't brush this morning."
I am sure it's not just this particular morning.
#50
I’m a patient, not a doctor, but I have a good one from when a doctor lied to me.
The doctor diagnosed me with inappropriate sinus tachycardia. When I asked him what we do about it he said, “We don’t need to do anything. You have a hormone imbalance that is causing this and it will go away on its own over time.”
No blood work or urine had ever been done or ordered by the doctor since I had started seeing them for the issue.
Side note: I have a new cardiologist. He’s amazing. This has been the only doctor that has blatantly lied to me. I have been brushed off by doctors before or had doctors in bad moods but never lied to like this. No doctor hate here, just to this one guy.
#51
Not a doctor but I worked in life insurance for a while. We had an agent opening his own policy and the requirements for the Whole Life he wanted was a blood test and medical exam. He did all the things, but when I declined him and his policy, he got upset and yelled via email that he 'doesn't do d***s!!'
Well, the positive c*****e I see on your blood test says otherwise....
#52
A cousin had an itch and it seemed right to put listerine in a syringe and introduce it into her vaginal opening. Then she had to go to the doctor and tell him that all her discomfort was okay, but she never mentioned the listerine to her and she spent months in treatment because the doctor told her that she had a burn on her cervix and that worried her until after maybe 6 months she confessed what she did and ah, the doctor changed her treatment and she improved in days. Nowadays she tells it and she laughs because the doctor was more worried than her.
Laserleader 2 months ago
Sad that your cousin went through months of pain before confessing. Would have been days if she just told the truth.
#53
Dietitian not a doctor - had a patient who I saw as an outpatient for recurrent "vomiting" who kept presenting to ED several times a day. Took a history and summarised "So you're saying you have been vomiting 12 times per day for 5 days and estimate each time you vomit its equal to about 1 cup, you haven't kept ANY food or ANY fluid down during this time and you're still producing 1.5-2L of urine a day (they had a catheter bag)". They said yes. I followed up with ",So you've basically been having close -5L of fluid per day and yet you've gained 2kg and are not showing any clinical signs of dehydration?". They went completely silent for a while and after some more probing, turned out they had a really s****y social situation and were trying to get admitted to the ward to get away from it all which was very sad.
Al Padilla 3 weeks ago
Now it's a game: What is a 6-letter word starting with s and ending with y.
#54
I was hanging curtains in the n**e and slipped off the ladder and fell r****m first onto this candlestick.
#55
“I broke my toe and need narcotics”
The patient walked into clinic wearing heels.
#56
Not a doctor but this story was passed down to me directly from my aunt, she was a nurse in the ER. She's amazing and she has so many stories. She always had stories to tell every time I visited her. This was one of my favorites.
Guy cheated on his wife and got a rash "down there" the morning after he slept with said side chick. It was an STD. He begged my aunt to tell his wife it was from a dirty toilet seat as he was scared of being caught.
Keep in mind, the chances of getting an STD from a dirty toilet seat are slim to none, and his wife, luckily, wasn't a professional so she didn't know much, if anything, about STDs or how to get them.
My aunt, being amazing, agreed because he bribed her to keep her mouth shut because his wife was already suspicious of him working overtime, and she needed the money (single mom 5 kids).
My aunt played along with the dirty toilet story. A few years later, she sees the guy again, told that they got divorced because the wife was cheating and she was the one to give him the STD in the first place.
#57
Not a doctor, but a medical assistant- “My blood pressure isn’t normally that high!”
My patient is panicking after seeing the numbers and swears up and down that the high BP is wildly abnormal and incredibly worrying. I don’t see any filled BP med prescriptions on their chart. I run the machine again, I get a manual BP, I get the nurse involved, we start checking in-depth for symptoms of a hypertensive crisis, we involve the doctor in case the patient needs to be admitted, and fifteen minutes later the patient comes out with “Well, I guess I haven’t taken my blood pressure medication at all in the past week. Could that be affecting it?”.
They were under the impression that being prescribed the medication would immediately change their blood pressure, even before they actually started taking the medication.
I’ve started asking about meds right away to head off the panicking when the BP comes back high, as it almost always does in our clinic.
#58
I asked a 5 yo how a bead got in his ear. He claimed he didn’t know. 🤨.
Laserleader 2 months ago
Probably didn't. 5 year olds shove things all kinds of places, and if they live with others the chances increase dramatically. How are they supposed to describe it?
#59
“I don’t eat that much “ or “all I eat is boiled chicken and vegetables “. All while being morbidly obese.
#60
My anesthesiologist sister routinely has patients claim to be allergic to every single narcotic…except dilaudid. (Or whatever the d**g of choice is, but it’s usually dilaudid.) They regret it, though.
As she explains to them, it’s extremely rare to be allergic to certain narcotics, so—since the patient is already allergic to so many of them—dilaudid will probably cause them to go into anaphylaxis the very next time they take it. Safest to do no narcotics…ever.
They will have to do their surgery on Tylenol. For post-surgery pain control? Tylenol. She’ll put a note in their charts and talk to their doctors about how they can never ever safely take any narcotics again, regardless of pain levels. Because of their allergies.
The thing is, everything she is saying is true. If they are allergic to half a dozen narcotics, they can’t safely take any narcotics. (Their clinic doctors, who they hound for dilaudid on the regular, usually respond to sis along the lines of “thank f**k, bless you.” Now they have a documented medical reason to say no every time without exception forever. Take a Tylenol.)
Don’t lie about medication allergies, kids.
#61
Me: Do you have hypertension?
Patient: I don't have hypertension
Me: Do you take any medications?
Patient: I'm taking Lozartan lowest dose daily. I have a low blood pressure already.
Debby Keir 2 months ago (edited)
That's the questioner's fault. If I take my meds, I no longer have high blood pressure, so the question is either what meds? or do you take anything to control your blood pressure? Remember an insurance case where the question was 'Do you suffer from high blood pressure?' Answer no, (because taking medication means that I don't 'suffer') Some people (not only those with autism) as VERY literal minded.
#62
Spanish speaking patient tested positive for m**h on his urine d**g screen. When I questioned him about it using a translator, patient proceeded to ask me whether it was “some sort of multivitamin”.
#63
NAD. I was a sonographer in a high risk obstetrics office for years. Had a patient 28 weeks pregnant with poorly controlled type 2 diabetes and a history of non-compliance come in for a scan. Asked her if she had been tracking her blood sugars and she very enthusiastically tells me yes and hands me her chart for the past month. All of the entries were written in the exact same pen and the numbers are way too consistent. She clearly had just filled in the values for the past month in one sitting.
#64
"Do you smoke weed or do any other d***s?"
"....noo.....".
Michael Largey 2 months ago
A standard question my doctor's nurse asks is "Are you taking any illegal d***s?" The doctor's practice is on a state border. Half his patients live in a state where weed is legal and half where it isn't. So the answer will depend as much on where you live as what you smoke. I've pointed this out to them, but nothing has changed.
#65
I’m a nurse not a doctor, but I once popped my head out from behind a wall and startled a man who was clearly trying to pump hand sanitizer into a cup of water I had given him 5 mins prior. In his state of panic, he instead pumped hand cream into it (mixed up the dispensers) and then told me he was “just looking for some more water.” Sure bud lol.
#66
I was the liar. I had the most terrible kidney infection and kidney stone at the same time. I was delirious with pain and fever but didn't have any health insurance as I'd recently been cut off by my parents. Somehow it seemed a great idea when registering for emergency care to use all her information to access her insurance. So I was 15 but trying very hard to convince the doctor that I was 45. They treated me and I was ok in a few days, but I could never go back knowing that there was no way that they didn't know I was telling the worst lies.
#67
“You can see she wrote doses on my d**g sheet - 600mg of methadone and 100mg of valium a day” - the h****n a****r, and hospital regular shouted at me. I look at the d**g card I can see where the pharmacist has written it down in standard green pen. Except for the last “0” of each dose which was in written in a slightly different shade of green pen. Bravo sir 👏.
#68
Not a doctor but gotta assume "how often do you drink alcohol?" Is a big one
Edit: I'm talking about from patients that are active alcoholics.
Michael Largey 2 months ago
I once had a doctor whom I didn't need to lie to about how much I drank. Because we both knew he drank much more than me.
#69
"I'm not crazy."
Look, if you really weren't, you didn't need to tell me every 2 minutes for over an hour.
Michael Largey 2 months ago
When I say that, I'm usually trying to convince myself. Not much luck so far.
#70
Not a doctor but I had a super sketchy looking lady come up to me once asking for a ride up a big hill for her dog. While already looking like an unhinged basket case she felt the need to let us know that “she wasn’t on d***s” I feel like the only person needing to announce they aren’t on d***s, probably are. Don’t know what her angle was about the ride up a hill for her dog, but we kept moving the other direction because we didn’t want to find out.
What do you think ?
Michael Largey 2 months ago
Misinformation can go both ways. When my doctor retired and I had to get a new one, there were all sorts of family history forms to fill out. I put down that my brother had diabetes, but it got input that I was the one who had it. My doctor has ordered my file changed at least five times, but the computer keeps saying I have diabetes.
Michael Largey 2 months ago
Misinformation can go both ways. When my doctor retired and I had to get a new one, there were all sorts of family history forms to fill out. I put down that my brother had diabetes, but it got input that I was the one who had it. My doctor has ordered my file changed at least five times, but the computer keeps saying I have diabetes.
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