Out of all types of cringe-worthy material, the "badass guy/girl" trope is one of the worst. Some people really feel the need to let the world know how much of a badass they are as they use guns/drugs/have tattoos/are anti-liberal or are just plain mean. However, such attempts at bad-assery are usually cringe-worthy rather than cool to all those around such people. Here, we made a list of all the laughable attempts at trying to appear cool and edgy. Prepare for some cringing, then scroll down below and leave a vote for those that made you laugh (or cringe).

#1

"I'm Italian. We don't call the cops - we call family"

fan0fchipotle Report

Xavier Wescott 3 months ago

this is another good one, especially if your Italian!

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#2

"The dumbest thing you can possibly do is piss off my wife. She will open the gates of hell and escort your a** right on in. And she will do it with a smile on her face"

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C 3 months ago

Purchased by his wife

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#3

"Pastor. Because hardcore devil stomping ninja isn't an official job title"

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Christina Sersif 3 months ago

Love this one lol

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#4

"Hey snowflake, in the real world you don't get a participation trophy, not everybody is a winner, no one owes you anything, screaming doesn't make you right, sometimes you actually lose, crying doesn't solve problems, nothing is free in this world, people are going to say things that you don't like and you are not special!"

Jackizback0 Report

Noonie Kehoe 3 months ago

Has he never heard that brevity is the key of wit?

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#5

"As a September guy, I'm the kind of friend who will help you hide a dead body, but if you betray me just remember I know how to hide a dead body"

saggywizardsleeve Report

Christina Sersif 3 months ago

Don’t understand the September guy part, but I think it’s a funny shirt otherwise

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#6

"I came into this world kicking and screaming while covered in someone else's blood and I have no problem with going out the same way"

Gurneyape35 Report

C 3 months ago

Well, that's a gross visual

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#7

"I have been the kind of man that when my feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says 'oh crap, he's up!'"

daisiebee123 Report

Christina Sersif 3 months ago

Haha this one is funny

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#8

"If this flag offends you, I'll help you pack"

unknown Report

Christina Sersif 3 months ago

I swear racists all look like Larry the cable guy

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#9

"I may seem quiet and reserved but if you mess with me while I'm bowling, I will break out a level of crazy that will make your nightmares seem like a happy place"

cassette_nova Report

Chris DiFonso 3 months ago

Wow, I didn't know that bowlers are such tough fellas!

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#10

"Beware: I ride horses, which means I own pitchforks, have the strength to haul hay and have the guts to scream at a half ton animal after being kicked. You will not be a problem"

GeekPro101 Report

Iggy 3 months ago

Again with epistles. Keep it short!

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#11

"Too fat to run, too fat to fight, I JUST SHOOT"

cattattattat Report

Jaguarundi 3 months ago

Wal*Martians are an embarrassing fact of life here in the 'States.

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#12

"Oh, you ran a marathon? That's so cute! Maybe when you grow up your mommy will let you do the rest of the race!"

Sycsa Report

ADHORTATOR 3 months ago

Well, if he did an Ironman, he is right...

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#13

"I am the weapon"

AnonymousAlAssasin Report

Noonie Kehoe 3 months ago

And it's a pea shooter.

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#14

"Only God can decide if terrorists are right or wrong. It's our job to arrange the meeting"

lionheart10801 Report

Iggy 3 months ago

God wants a word with you in his office.

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#15

"Do I look like someone who cares what God thinks?"

PeteyChamp51 Report

Noonie Kehoe 3 months ago

Maybe not but he definitely cares what everyone else thinks.

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#16

"I am an asshole man: I love freedom, drink beer and love my wife. I protect my family, I eat meat and have tattoos. If you don't like it - move"

ibepunkinmugs Report

Christina Sersif 3 months ago

Bet this shirt was made in China

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#17

"I didn't serve this country for pussies to tell me that I should be politically correct"

worstbaby Report

Iggy 3 months ago

In my experience, people who object to PC ("It's PC gone mad!") have usually just been caught and called out for being racist, sexist or homophobic.

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#18

"I have three sides: the quiet side, the fun and crazy side, the side you never want to see"

themaskedpoosader Report

Noonie Kehoe 3 months ago

He three sides: the quiet side; the fun & crazy side; the back side.

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#19

"As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil , for I am the baddest motherf***er in the valley"

Silver_or_Lead Report

Iggy 3 months ago

'Baddest' MF waiting patiently in a line and wearing trainer liners.

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#20

"Peace is not my profession - it's yours. War is my profession. Should you fail at your job, I will not fail at mine"

mtbullard14 Report

Amy Pattie 3 months ago

A T-shirt worn by exactly no one in the military.

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#21

"I am 10 times the asshole you could ever hope to be. Now run along"

SWEDinTexas Report

Iggy 3 months ago

Can we not even stay long enough to marvel at the sartorial elegance?

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#22

"Careful, <...> I'm this old for a reason"

IamMull Report

Iggy 3 months ago

Even Death doesn't want you?

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#23

"Stay back 100 meters or you will be shot"

LetsGoGameCrocks Report

Iggy 3 months ago

No one has any intentions of going within a kilometre of you so we'll be fine.

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#24

"There are a lot of people in the world to mess with, I'm the one you may wanna skip"

NateLeport Report

Tore Hana 3 months ago

What’s with the constant “Mess with...” on all these shirts..?

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#25

"Obama can't ban these guns"

Try_AnotherUsername Report

Iggy 3 months ago

Water pistols.

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#26

"If this flag offends you, you need a history lesson"

Mnkeyqt Report

Christina Sersif 3 months ago

Someone has a little pp

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#27

"Forklift operator. My sense of humor may hurt your feelings or offend you. I suggest you buckle up, buttercup! I change for no one"

tardgard69 Report

C 3 months ago

Lol, everyone at my job operates a forklift. It's not special

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#28

"I oil my guns with liberal tears"

Pav1001 Report

Iggy 3 months ago

I would have thought salty water would be bad for guns...

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#29

"Never, and I mean never, mess with 4-H kids, because in 4-H we are a family... and if you mess with the family you better run"

lofzfreak Report

Iggy 3 months ago

Sorry, I got bored halfway through.

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#30

"I ain't taking no orders from no woman"

Battlecrafter Report

C 3 months ago

Women everywhere are worried

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#31

"And on the 8th day God created elevator constructors and the devil stood at attention"

monsterscribbles Report

C 3 months ago

Well I'll be... I didn't realize that was such a proud profession

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#32

"No one meets death until they see me"

CliveFuturePM Report

Iggy 3 months ago

No one wishes for death until they meet him!

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#33

"I am a grumpy old man. I'm allergic to stupidity, I break out in sarcasm, I was born in July, I protect my family and I love my country. If this offends you - I don't care"

Bilomacer Report

Iggy 3 months ago

Offended, no. Bored, yes.

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#34

"I'm not a bully, you're just a pussy!"

AydanOfHouseCock Report

Christina Sersif 3 months ago

As he’s holding a little girls hand. Just sad.

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#35

"Ass kicker"

socialistmedic07 Report

Mindy Keys 3 months ago

I wonder where Ass Kickers 1-41 are...

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#36

"I can always get a new job but you'll always be stupid"

principaljohnny Report

Iggy 3 months ago

I think he might struggle to get any job.

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#37

"Cool story, babe. Now make me a sandwich"

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C 3 months ago

Nice fedoras tools

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#38

"Nobody needs an AR15? Nobody needs a whiny little b***h either, yet here you are"

LaCockandRancha Report

Aria Whitaker 3 months ago

Yep, all those parents crying over lost children due to these types of weapons are just "whiny little bitches". What a sleazeball. Who in world raises these people?

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#39

"Never underestimate a man who was born in November. You know my name, not my story, you heard what I've done, not what I've been through"

profitableprophet Report

C 3 months ago

These are like bad astrology shirts

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#40

"Talk s**t - spit blood"

Toosh0933 Report

Iggy 3 months ago

Why can't any of these guys find a decent pair of jeans?

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