“I Thought It Was Normal For Too Long”: 30 Weird And Disturbing Rules Parents Had Their Children Follow
As children, we don’t really give ourselves the luxury to question our parents' decisions. Nor do they allow us that.
Especially when it comes to the rules they set around their house and family life that you have little option but to comply with. Only when we grow up can we take a step back and look at these rules from a whole different perspective. And sometimes, we realize they made zero sense.
“What bizarre rule did your parents enforce that seemed normal, but when you grew up realized was not normal at all?” someone posed a question on the Ask Reddit community. Many people took the opportunity to get their childhood rules off their chest and share the stories with others. Below we selected the most interesting ones.
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Not me, but this guy in my neighborhood. So the 1st day of high school rolls around and there is this new kid at the bus stop. I try to make small talk, but he doesn't seem interested. I see him around school and he never talks to anyone. Everyday at the bus stop I try to make small talk and slowly, over many weeks, he says more and more.
One morning he says to me that I can come over after school for a snack. I'm like "Sure, dude". After school we go to his house and it is super clean. Like operating room clean. We sit at the kitchen table and his mom sits with us. He looks a little worried, but I don't understand why at the time.
As we eat our snack (sugar wafers and milk do NOT go together) his mom starts to ask me questions. Things like what music I listen to. What does my dad do for a living. What are my grades. What church do I go to. Lots of weird questions for a kid in the 9th grade. With some of my answers she would look to her son, who gave more and more worried looks. Eventually she stopped grilling me and said that her son needed to do his homework and I should leave. I was glad to get out of there at that point.
I go home and mention to one of my older brothers what happened and he was all "Holy s**t! You met the mole kid!". Turns out that this kid had lived in my neighborhood for all these years and I didn't even know it! He was home schooled and not let out in the front of the house.
Over the next 4 years we ruined this kid for his parents. He rebelled against their rules and became one of the guys. We introduced him to the world of sports, beer, weed, and girls.
After high school we lost touch (my fault. rough patch for me).
Hey Jason, if you read this, look up the guy who had all those older brothers back in high school. I miss you.
I will say this once...parents that are really strict with their kids out of fear that they will run with a bad crowd or get in trouble are actually creating the scenario in which they will rebel and run around with the very crowd you are trying to protect them from. If your kids spend their childhoods fearing you, they will never tell you when things go really wrong or ask for help. But they will turn to the people that gave them the most freedom to be themselves. Keep that in mind. I ran around with a bad crowd because I was afraid of my mother. But I will be forever grateful to the friends that gave me a sense of freedom that I never got at home.
We had to wake up whenever my parents got up, even if it was 4 a.m. One of them would yell up the stairs for us to get up. Didn't realize I could get up at my own leisure until I got married and moved out. One day I got out of bed when my husband did and we were sitting in the living room watching tv when I exclaimed that I was still tired, he said "So go back to bed then" and it was like those moments on a show when an actor just looks at the camera with a surprised expression. The sudden realization that I could wake up whenever I wanted was over whelming.
Also now that I have a kid I have no idea why they wouldn't let us sleep so they could have some free time? Like damn if my son is sleeping I'm taking in all the quiet and enjoying myself some free time.
4 minute shower restricted to once a week. This was when I was in high school. This is all my folks did to save money so it was all I was allowed as well. If I exceeded the 4 minutes they would turn off the hot water from the main valve by the water heater. Imagine that- a high school boy allowed one shower a week and only a 4 minute shower.
I now take a shower a day and sometimes two. And sometimes until the hot water runs out.
Teenage boys need to shower more than once a week. Adults too, really. Some people take money saving too far. I bet this saved them very little money.
Trust Game! Mom would hold knives to our necks sometimes and say "it ll all be over in a feeewwww minutes" or wake us up putting a pillow over our face and plugging our noses, same thing " it ll all be over in a fewww minutes" if we freaked out she get upset say we didn't trust her. Hence the trust game.
Normal parents take a toy away until their child's behavior improves, then returns the toy as a reward for good behavior.
My mother just took my stuff and never gave it back. She'd claim that we could 'earn' our toys back with extra chores and good grades, but she never followed through even though I was on honor roll every single semester. I was in college when the closet organizer in our hallway closet had a critical failure, so I came home to help move stuff. I found an entire box of my confiscated books and toys. I s**t you not, my mother picked up a beanie baby and looked at me sadly while she said, "I was waiting for you to earn this back." What, were you going to surprise me with after I walked the stage and got my diploma?
I wasn't allowed to have boys phone or come calling for me because my mom didn't want me to turn out to be "some little s**t".
Joke's on you, mom.
We had a lock on the fridge and were never allowed to help ourselves to anything - you had to ask, usually the answer was 'no'.
I started buying junk food and hiding it in my closet - I think my father was completely clueless about growing teenage appetites and smoked, so his appetite was almost non-existent.
I struggle with binge eating to this day - I still love a good gorge, it means freedom and a giant middle finger to that lock on the fridge.
This is so incredibly sad. My parents kept the snacks in a locked cupboard in the garage; my sis picked the lock and they moved the snacks. My mum used to hoard food in her room, and one time I snuck in there and ate some of it; I got into soooo much trouble over that. I was like 9 at the time.
My parents are pretty much hoarders so we would get in trouble for cleaning. My mom always blamed our house being messy on her just being "too busy" so once in junior high I thought I would surprise her and have the whole kitchen clean when she got home. I cleared all the piles off the counters, threw away a bunch of decades-old magazines, and took out like 2 giant bags of trash. When she got home she was NOT pleased, but panicked, and promptly went digging outside in the trash can to bring the stuff back in. :/
This is a mental illness - it's so hard for people to let go of stuff. Some people who suffer can clearly see what's wrong with them but can't help them self nor get help by professional. The others don't even see an issue with their behavior
Until the age of 13 myself and siblings each had to take baths with dad to ensure we cleaned everywhere.
My parents wouldn't let me do anything with friends if they felt I had "done enough that week" or "didn't need to" even when I hadn't done anything at all that particular week. My friends started calling it the fun meter. "Wanna come play basketball at the park or is your fun meter full this week?"
I feel this. My parents would arbitrarily let me go out with friends. No reason or rhyme to it.
Not a rule, just something that I never realized was weird until I was an adult. My mom had a phobia of needles, so she managed to find a dentist who didn't believe in giving novocaine shots. For any reason. Didn't even use that numbing gel.When you had a cavity, and needed to have your teeth drilled, he would just tell you to hold onto his assistant's hand, and squeeze when it hurt. Thank God, none of us ever needed to have a tooth pulled. As a result, I developed a phobia of dentists, and after I left my parents house at 18, waited 23 years, before I ever got up the nerve to go to a dentist again. When I finally did, they were shocked. The hygienist said, "Your teeth are beautiful. You don't even have any cavities." I said "I know. I do everything in my power to avoid having to come see you people."
I grew up with the same dentist experience… still have to get full anaesthesia or laughing gas for the most minor things. Thanks mom!
"You eat everything you're served". So if they put a whole lot of food on our plate, and we had already eaten enough and were not hungry anymore, we would have to stay on the table until we were done.
Took me hours.... Mom guilt tripping me (with "other children in the world are starving, how dare you.)... The times I was 4 hours at the table were plentiful, picking my food, then finally giving in. Then rewarded with doing the dishes at 10 or 11 at night... I wasn't even a teen.
I was raised in a fundy Christian household. Though our media options were limited to veggie tales and the like, we always had to ask before watching any video. Usually, the answer was a simple yes or no. But this one time, I was around 14 and asked my dad if I could watch Winnie the Pooh (it was for my little siblings, but I was bored). He told me, dead serious, that he needed to pray about it. Right there, he asked God for wisdom in deciding whether I should watch it or not. I stood there just trying to figure out if he was messing with me. He was not. After about a minute, he looks at me and says, "I guess that would be okay."
Juice always had to be watered down to 50%.
It wasn't a bad rule--saves calories and money--but it totally blew my mind when I found out that other families drink orange juice *full strength*.
Pure juice of any kind is bad for you - soo much sugar!!! A small glass isn't too bad but not loads of it :(
No one was allowed to s**t in our house. We had a large house and all 4 of us had our own restrooms. There was this little girl with special needs I used to play with when I was little and once she had to use the restroom. My mom asked me where she was and I said she's in the bathroom. My mom walked in on the poor girl mid-s**t and told her to go home and finish.
for those confused if you go to the source link then OP clarifies that no outsiders were allowed to s**t in OP’s house.
My dad had several weird ones to this day I still don't understand.
I wasn't allowed to read at the table while I was eating or drinking. Even if I was completely by myself drinking coffee, if he walked in on me he would berate me for having a 'toy' at the table.
No one in the family was allowed to drink at the counter in the kitchen. I have a habit of just draining a glass of water and pouring myself a second one. I didn't see the point of filling a glass, going to sit down, spend about a minute drinking, and then getting back up just to refill the glass. I tend to drain most drinks in a matter of seconds, so I got into the habit of just drinking at the counter. First time my dad saw me doing this he lost it yelling at me about how it wasn't normal and to sit down at the table while I drank.
Reading books before bedtime was forbidden. Everyone in the house throughout the day has to be 'productive'. Reading is for right before you go to bed. Finish all your chores before everyone else? F**k you, your brother/sister is still cleaning, you're just being lazy by sitting down to read a book!
He also had major issues with me just reading in general, even for class assignments. I actually had a full on argument with him a couple of times about The Great Gatsby and Catcher in the Rye I was reading for my English Lit class. He was trying to prevent me from reading them, but I shot back I had too because it counted towards my grade. The entire class also took a huge test on each book, so NOT reading wasn't an option.
Yeah, he was a bizarre person. Suffice to say we don't talk anymore.
The "duty before pleasure" policy makes sense until he said he had completed all his chores but he couldn't relax because he had to help his sibling completing their chores. It's really stupid, to be honest. It's just going to make the kids work slowly so they won't be the first to finish and have to do more work. If I still have to work after I've done my work how can I be motivated to work faster? It really makes no sense, parents' wise.
I wasn't allowed to say anything my parents didn't like - it would result in an immediate grounding or "fine" from my allowance. As for rules, no sleeping past 10 am. Ever. All chores must be done before going out or doing anything. Only one hour of T.V per evening and only one dessert per week. One hour of internet at a time (this was early 2000ish) and only if my dad wasn't using the computer (he always was).
Now for the weird ones...
- no farting
- no ketchup on potatoes or eggs
- no more than a tablespoon or so of a condiment at any given time
- no hiccups
- if you had hiccups, no eating or drinking (edit: or speaking)
- no being "hyper" - ever.
- no getting angry
- no using the washroom upstairs
- no speaking during T.V shows at all (on the rare occasion that I was allowed to watch T.V upstairs).
And the pièce de résistance...
- (For a year or so) no using the word I
I wasn't allowed to sleep over at friends' houses until I was almost in middle school. Why? Because my mother was afraid that we would play Russian Roulette.
Here's a christmas-y one for ya'll!
No christmas presents after you turn 12
- t'was okay since we barely got presents from my mum (who we lived with) and my dad (I don't think I had even seen him in 4 years at the time.)
BUT THEN...
she spread the rule to my abuelita and grandpa (the only other people we got presents from.) ugh.
Oh and we also had to make all our own food since we were 13 which made me take to only binge eating at lunch and nothing else all day.
Oh AANNDD she would hurt our pets if they hurt her. I mean like if a cat ever scratched her (wow really who woulda thought cats do that?) she would scream really loud and bite the cat.
Fun fact: I've never had a full punch on with anyone other than my mum...maybe my sister but ya know...kids.
The cat one is the worst one! It's still just an animal and just reading that the mom hurt the kitty hurts my heart.
Not I, but my father's stepmother used to make he and my aunt clean up the living room, kitchen, and dining room while her and her "real children" were taken to McDonalds, every Friday.
The most f****d up thing is, my father said that the first time she made them clean up, she said that her and the two step-siblings would switch off every week as to who would clean and who would go to McDonalds. He said he doesn't ever remember going to McDonalds. Neither does my aunt.
He was 7, she was 12.
I treated my step kids like my own. No longer with their mom, over 10 years now. None of the three speak to their mother and 2 out of three don't speak to their father either. My stepson (M24) recently asked me for permission to change his last name to mine as he doesn't want to be associated with either birth parent.
Only 3 sheets of toilet paper allowed per visit. This included if you went number 2. I swear my mum used to stand outside and listen and she just knew when I used more and I would get yelled at and the door nearly broken down. This ran into my teens.
That 'the man' was watching us (my sister and I as kids).
Not santa, literally 'the man'.
So say if we were playing up, they'd go 'you'd better stop that, he's watching' and we'd quit immediately for the impending dread this man would bring. How f*****g creepy is that?
No saying "no." As long as someone asks kindly you have to say yes.
I wasn't allowed to be a witch on Halloween because my parents were afraid it would offend actual witches. I also wasn't allowed to be a ghost because they were afraid I would attract actual ghosts and I wasn't allowed to be a vampire because they were afraid a real vampire might mistake me for a real vampire. Both my parents were highly superstitious and into the occult, which I didn't realize until later since we went to temple and I went to hebrew classes, but apparently my father was secretly a practicing wiccan and my mother was just going along with everything. Somehow they both got it into their heads that I was attracting poltergeists that were specifically out to get my mom and so they decided I wasn't allowed to do anything that could attract evil spirits. For some reason this rule didn't seem to apply to my brother...
Your father wasn't a Wiccan, he was a mental case. Oh he may have read something about the Wiccan religion, but he missed entirely the point of what he had read and focused entirely on what could feed his existing anxieties and obsessions until he reached borderline dangerously insane territory. I sure hope you got out of that scene.
My step-dad when I was growing up was a very strange man. We had to sign and date the inside of our toilet tissue rolls because he wanted to make sure we weren't going through TP too fast. Want to borrow a pencil? I did in 7th grade. I had to write and sign a one page lease (with said pencil) outlining the whole scenario and how I would return it, when, in what condition...
My allowance was $1/week. This paid for toothpaste, shampoo, and conditioner. Nice...
My mom had to put receipts of the grocery trips on the fridge and he'd pay her for specific items he deemed were his. He was such a piece of work.
My mother was a bit younger than he, so his children weren't in her children's age bracket, and none of us were very close. In middle school he gave me his daughter's diary from years before when she was in high school. I read about a page and was horrified that he was abusing her privacy in such a way. He loved to mention when I was 16 that I was as pretty as I would ever be and if he were younger and not married to my mother...(as if). I even had to pay rent to live at home IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He was special. And I don't mean that in a good way. The only positive thing about it was I was naturally a very shy person, but he put my hackles up so much that I became very argumentative and adversarial in regards to him. Overall, that wasn't a bad skill to develop. That man's bare feet never touched the ground or felt blades of grass in his life. He was afraid of germs and Catholic guilt and "that one experience in college" with his roommate. He was just a man who couldn't deal with himself so he lorded himself over others in strange ways. What I've mentioned is the tip of a very large iceberg of weirdness.
He was something strange to grow up with. I'm still a people pleaser to a degree, but when my bs meter goes off I have zero patience for it and speak or act accordingly--mostly because I spent my last few years when they were still married being defiant towards him. Who wouldn't?
Sadly, I had a friend from that age whose step-dad was WAY worse than what I had to deal with, but that isn't my story to tell.
I never got an allowance...but I didn't have to pay for my own deodorant or shampoo. I also rarely went to the movies or out anywhere with friends because I had no money. When I was in high school, my friends usually paid for me. I'm forever grateful for them giving me a life outside of my home.
My mom never let us whistle - she sad it would attract mice. I now know she was just making stuff up because whistling was annoying to her lol
I also heard about this superstition, so it's not just your mother. Another one - if you whistle you'll go broke.
My parents made us kids use the back door to get in and out of the house, the front door was for parents and guests only. I thought it was normal for too long.
8:30 bedtime. My. Entire. Damned. Life. Though, I knew as a teenager that making your high schooler go to bed when it was still light out half the time was whacko.
Well into my 20s I'd come back to visit for the holidays and dad would get up to use the toilet at night, see the light on in my room from me being awake reading a book at 10 p.m., and yell at me to go to sleep.
I was raised a Jehovahs Witness, so yeah. Not having friends outside of religion was pretty strictly enforced until I got into my teens.
Everything I read about JWs makes me more and more concerned because I know one and she's really nice. She's also lesbian, does anyone know the JW opinions on that?
My grandma was a JW, and disowned my mother for marrying a Catholic. I'm sure that they would disown your friend if the church/family found out. JW are a cult, not a religion
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When I was in junior high school, I started to become friends with twins whose parents were Jehovah's Witnesses. They invited me to come over to their house after school, and I went, thinking that we would just hang out and get to know each other better. When I got there, they introduced me to their mom... who shut me in the kitchen to interview me. After an hour of personal and excruciatingly embarrassing questions, their mom told me to go home. The twins never talked to me again. If I happened to run into them in the hallways between classes, they acted as though I wasn't there. I felt so sorry for them.
The amount of women (young girls) raped by JW men is unbelievably disgusting. The men are not punished.
In 19 years of being raised as a JW, I don't know one single person that was ever raped. Must have just been your local congregation.
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I was born into being a jehovahs witness and I got the hell out of it as soon as I could
Well done, I know that can’t have been easy. One massive achievement that is.
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Oof. I had 4 friends from jehovah witness families. And let me tell you, the teen rebellion of 3 of them were strong.
I once had a shouting match with one after they kept coming to my house. For a long time they were alone which is ok, I said I am not interested politely and a few days later another came. However I noticed a trend of using (training?) children. When it was the 3rd time each person were accompanied by a child clearly not their own (wildly different ethnic group), I only talked to the kiddo. I said things like: "when you get older, it is ok to turn your back to these people" or "most people find the jwh way of living empty and meaningless". Then a guy asked me not to talk to the child to which I snapped saying why tf you drag this individual with you all day in the cold and rain then? Shouting match ensued, I will apparently burn in hell and they've stopped coming. I still feel sorry for the kids
I grew up "studying" to be a Witness. What I've noticed that people within the religion make up little arbitrary rules that cater to their own compulsions and beliefs. They are a odd bunch.
They are odd, but they all have the same set of rules they follow. They're pretty strict and have rules for almost any situation you could imagine, very little room for making your own rules in anything.
Load More Replies... I knew one girl who went wild after leaving the JW religion at 18 in order to go to college and not enter an arranged marriage. Restrictions just equal rebellion
JW's don't do arranged marriage. You're free to marry whomever you like as long as it's a hetro marriage.
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My former SIL was a RABID JW. Told my four year old daughter that she was going to hell for celebrating Christmas or her birthday, for going to the Catholic church, for going Trick or Treating. I told her I'd kick the everlovin' sh*t out of her if she ever spoke to my child about her religious beliefs again. And I meant it. Twisted b*tch.
Considering they don't believe in hell I doubt a JW would say something like that. Maybe telling your daughter those things were wrong according to her religion, but deffinately not threatening her with hell.
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I was born and raised jehovahs witness. Same rule. They taught us to fear anyone outside our religion, the whole world was evil and out to steal our souls away from god and have use condemned. I left at 17 after they told me that innocent babies would be destroyed at Armageddon due to their parents, and after an elder told me- after telling him I was being physically abused by my father- that the Bible said I needed to respect him as the head of our household and that "frankly dear, you just need to toughen up". Took years of therapy to be rehabbed into society and even then, I struggle with agoraphobia. My best friend later left the same religion after she was reprimanded by the congregation elders for calling the police on her sexually abusive father.
Good friend, came out as a Bi. Her fam in that group was prepping to send her to a 'Reeducation Camp'. She got away just in time
They don't have JW reeducation camps. Must have been something they arranged outside the organization.
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My parents were foster parents for teen girls. I remember one girl that lived with us was 15 years old and her family “turned their back on her” and she no longer existed. They were jahovahs witnesses and the church excommunicated her. Why? A boy from school kissed her on her cheek one day after school as she was walking to her parents car. She didn’t kiss him. He ran by pecked her on the cheek and kept running. Well of course this meant she was a whore and sexually active with all the boys in school. She ran away when she was told that she would be examined by the elders to see if she in “unclean”. Because she ran away it proves they were correct and bam excommunicated. She lived with us til she was 18 and her 5 years younger sister came to us when she was around the same age. My parents helped her find a place to live and further education and she was able to get custody of her sister later. I’ve tried to find her on fb. This was in the early 90’s. I need to find her again.
Cont. I was around 10 when she first moved in with us. Even as a 10 year old I couldn’t believe a mom and dad could do this to their child. Last I talked to her was in the early 00’s and her family still wouldn’t acknowledge her or her sister and 2 of her brothers. But they had each other so that was wonderful.
Load More Replies... You can be gay and be a JW but you are not allowed to act upon it in any way. And they will try to preach it out of you as if it's something you can control. My brother in law fought against his 'gay demons' most of his adult life as a JW and finally ended up committing suicide two years ago. He was a lovely, kind man and his only 'sin' was being gay. I was brought up in this religion until the age of 16 when I left it and home at the same time. It is a very constricting religion, especially for adolescents. Not a time of my life I would like to re-live.
I was also raised JW. I had to leave home to be able to have actual friends, and no extra curricular activities because we would be around too many "worldly people".
I have a friend who is a JW who, since we've entered our senior year, is now pushing our whole friend group away simply because we're not part of her religion.
If only 4Thousand will only get into heaven ??? Where Do you think all the rest go when the die ??? All the people In history that followed those lies ??? Use your. Brain, this does not matter to the damned. Cult yet again?? Get far far away from that if you want to live without nuts
Sorry for being late by almost a year but my family are Jehovah Witnesses and yes we can have friends but we don’t want bad association but if the parents enforced no friends rule then I completely understand that and very much sorry for that Sir or Miss also if anyone wants to know bout Jehovah Witnesses we have a website and an app called JW Libery and JW.org
Nope! Homosexuality is a huge NO NO. I had to tell my son that he was bi and she was ok with it cos it was his "choice" . I educated her on that it isn't a "choice" and all was ok. But had it been 10 years earlier... I would have copped a huge fight. She was in her late 70's at the time and had chilled a lot! Still a religious nut job, but much more chill now. It is the reason I am an agnostic atheist
I studied with JW a while it was a laughable experience. Went to dinner to hear the bulimic daughter puke immediately after and then ignore the problem. That was the end line for me.
My dads a baptist youth pastor but also a theology historian and a contractor. At his contracting job he worked with a JW and he used to ask so many questions that would frazzle the poor guy
Yes, I am one. Try to explain the best without seeming being a jerk about it. As one if JW's we are concern that our young ones can be influenced by non JW's in a bad way. So we are cautious of letting our children who we let them associate with. As for JW's stand on lesbian and gay people, we believe in what the Bible has to say on such matters. At Romans chap. 1 versus 26,27 says "That is why God gave them over to uncontrolled sexual passion, for their females changed the natural use of themselves into one contrary to nature, likewise also the males left the natural use of the female and became violently inflamed in their lust toward one another, males with males, working what is obscene and receiving themselves the full penalty which was due for their error." This is just one reasoning why we don't believe in homosexuals activity. If you want to know more you can always talk to a JW's or go to jw.org and get more information. How can over 8 1/2 million people world wide be a cult.
We weren't allowed to take our clothes/shoes to mom's. We had to change into what we wore when we arrived. It wasn't until I was in middle school that I learned that other kids *own* their stuff. Weird.
Actually, I get this. When she was 5, my stepdaughter's mom would send her in clothes that were too small, too large, with holes or stains, or didn't match. If we bought her clothes and she took them home, we'd never see them again. About a year or so in, I asked my husband to let me buy her clothes that she kept at our house. When she arrived, she'd wear what I got her that actually fit and were in good condition. When she went home, she had to change back into her home clothes that she came in. Sometimes we would get her things she could take home, but we knew we might never see it again. Sure enough, by the time she was in late elem/middle school, her mom was taking her clothes that we bought her. Sigh. Now, we have full custody so it's no longer an issue.
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So many of these posts are examples of abusive behaviour, so sad and sorry for all involved X
I didn't have the patience to get through all of them but from the ones I saw, I agree. Some of these parents have no business have children under their care.
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Too bad people aren't required to study and pass a test before being allowed to have children.
I had to go through more scrutiny to get an abandoned dog from a rescue than 2 adults who decide to make a new human.
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Okay, I couldn’t even get through the first 10. This is one of the most horrific posts I’ve ever read on here. I hope all these people who grew up in these abusive situations are doing okay now. 😞❤️
As a parent I'm a firm believer in picking my battles - why would I make my life and theirs more difficult by making up stupid rules that have zero logic behind it? I'm pretty laid back as to what my kids are allowed but you can bet your a*s I expect them to be decent humans and show people respect - as to how much toilet roll I really don't care as long as I'm not dealing with skid marks, if they're hungry then eat, if your not then don't - I really don't understand why anyone has kids just to make their everyone's lives miserable - what is the freaking point?
These posts are all examples of horrible physical, emotional and sexual abuse. I hope these people are ok today.
This stuff is HORRIBLE. The only "rules" we have are: If you spill the salt, pour some over your left shoulder. If it's yellow, let it mellow, if it's brown, flush it down. Last one out locks the door. If you're going downstairs, take something down. If you're going up, take something up. If someone makes a particularly hilarious or incisive comment, you must high five them. No drinking directly from the jug. All these "rules" are agreed upon family rules, that are part of our family "folklore".
All these parents acting like they've been held ar gunpoint by their own future children's souls and been forced to conceive them. Uhm no, you deliberately decided to have kids (or your inconsiderate actions led to a pregnancy) and you have to raise them, provide for them, create for them a sane, healthy and positive environment, do everything for them to grow up and become functioning adults. Your kids shouldn't pay for their food or their basic hygiene products, feeding and clothing them is not a "gift" from your own part, that's not even the minimum standard... And those post, my friends are like the poster child (or whatever it's called) for the legalization of abortion, contraception and sex education. I wonder how many more kids will be born in a household where they are not wanted, maybe even hated... How will they be treated?
Agree with you on how kids don't owe their parents anything, etc. but society does push women in the direction of "settling down and having children." Going against that is something that takes effort and strength that some people don't have or want to muster. Hell, some people don't even realize it's an option, partly because of how they were raised by their parents. It doesn't excuse the behavior but I would argue many if not most people don't even consiously sit down and decide to have and raise children. Which is a huge problem and needs ro change.
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My first Stepdad was obese. He weighed 320lbs, and he hated me and my brothers, but I made sure he took it out on me. He would hit my mom because she wouldn't give us up for adoption. He would quickly burn me with his cigars, slap me for no reason and call me stupid and useless. He would stand on my back, crushing me. I lit a cigar he was holding When my youngest brother was born, his biological son, he got even nastier. He would punch me and slap me. On one occasion, hit put my hand in the gas cooker ring while it was lit because I passed him his lighter. I think I had coined the phrase Fat B*st*rd before Chubby Brown or Mike Myers. I also suffered from rage issues. I still do. I avoid fights and conflict because I escalate quickly and become very violent. Luckily, it triggers in defence and I never start a fight. One day, he kicked me over at the top of the stairs at home and jumped on my back. I snapped and stood straight up. I was 11 at the time, and he fell down the stairs.
He saw me screaming as I leapt down the stairs at him with both fists balled up and moved out of the way. The neighbour came rushing in thinking someone had broken into our house and was attacking us. It only ended when my mom finally snapped and smashed a pottery chicken over his head on new years eve at a party we were throwing and told him to get the f*ck out and told everyone what he did and does. The stories I could tell you would make your blood boil. He's dead now. I had a party with my brothers. We had cake
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You have to study, pass a test, and get a license to become a doctor, a layer, or a teacher. You have to study, pass a test, and get a license to drive a car. In most cases, you have to undergo periodic re-licensing or recertification to show that your skills have remained current. Yet we have none of those requirements to become a parent, even though unqualified people have the potential to ruin their children's lives, and possibly pass that ruination down for generations. What is wrong with this picture?
I kinda think therapy should be mandatory during pregnancy and a few years of the child's life. Sometimes it's nobody's fault that they don't know better, but people can absolutely be taught what's good for children and what isn't.
Load More Replies... Wow, where to begin. 1. I wasn't allowed to date while living at home but I also couldn't move out until I was married. Figure that one out. 2. If I cooked anything, I had to clean up before eating it and if my brothers were hungry and I want eating the food they could help themselves even if I was washing so I could eat it. That translates to cold food or no food if any of my brothers were home. 3. I couldn't make phone calls unless a parent approved and they were on the other line listening. I never called anyone since the answer was normally no or they were too busy to monitor it. 4. No changing your hair without permission. 5. No borrowing other people's clothes. I couldn't buy my own either. 6. No sports except the girl ones and they had to take me if they had time which they never did. So I got a little chubby which they ridiculed me for. These are just what come to mind. I've suppresses most of my childhood. I think the reasons for that are obvious.
i grew up with an abusive, mentally ill mother that was basically a combination of all of the above. i'm 51 years old now and to this day i still sometimes get nightmares. i am so sorry for all the things these people have had to endure
My heart goes out to all of these poor abused kids. I hope life is better.
As children, all food and drink had to be consumed sitting at the table except water. Only exception was special movie nights when we would have snacks and pop in front of the tv. As an adult, I still eat every meal sitting at the kitchen table. Keeps the house clean and the furniture unstained so I mostly think it’s a good rule.
Pinching. Like constantly. There was nothing inappropriate about it, just stupid. Father would pinch our forearms or lower back and simply thought it was funny we - me and my sister - squeeled and whimpered, thought it for some kind of prank. He came from a very abusive family which explains he never had a chance to see how to treat people nice, and he was otherwise mostly okay, but we never got this annoying habit out of him. Disgusted me so much I still don't do well with people behind my back or touching these parts of me (though otherwise I love to hug and cuddle) and myself, I never touched a person - or a pet as a matter of fact - otherwise than softly and with their consent.
This was Truly Sad to read & Breaks my heart 💔 to know so many have been hurt , traumatized and robbed of a childhood that was not Wonderful. So much Mental Illness & Cult behaviors. In tears I read this 😢 wishing there was a way for this disgusting reproduction of sick humans acting less than. 😔 it's horrible secrets to carry. And I an so very sorry. This is not even the tip of the truth. Evil effing people These are some truth we have learned , but Much More than we could ever know is out there happening Right now.💔
Not all parents can or should have kids But all kids need to have a good parent
Some people evidently have kids just so they have minions to boss around. That's so gross.
My mother, of blessed memory, was by and large great. However, if I went to a friend's house after school with a SAHM, I would call to let her know and she would always tell me to go back home....to an empty house....and wait there for hours for someone else to come home. I wish I could ask her what that was all about.
I don't understand how these people had the energy to be like this with kids.
This post wasn't what I was expecting. A?lot of these were abusive. Reed them all.
I don't let my kids in case there's a p3do there and no supervision-
My brother and sister and I couldn't even be in the yard when he cut grass. I didn't cut grass the first time until I almost 30. When a new theatre came to town, it was near our local airport. We could never go to that theatre because it was in the landing path of planes. (Funny thing, though, years after he passed, a small plane did crash right next to the airport.) I could go on and on, but those are my top two! I will admit, however, it has made me much more safety conscious, even though I have an irrational fear of fire and checking the mail on just about any road!
feel so sad reading these comments. while i would never call myself a perfect parent i could never institute most of these rules. i have one son. because i was aware that other parents didn't always supervise their kids i made my home welcoming for his friends as i could keep an eye on them. rules were simple: no alcohol/drugs/smoking/cussing. respect my house-don't break it. respect my dogs. pick up after yourself including son's room if you helped mess it up. and, just because i wanted to make sure they respected my rules one silly one: if you have a penis then no earrings. it was always a secret chuckle to see the boys filing in while they removed their earrings and put them in their pockets. of all the boys that spent time in m home only one violated the rules which banned him from the house. he was a good kid, he was sorry but i had to be firm. his mom even called to see if i would rescind my decision but i had to keep as an example. sorry lenny-you were still a good kid
I feel sorry for Lenny. Could you not have just given him a temporary "grounding" from your house? Lol
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Probably not. Abusive controlling parents exist everywhere.
Load More Replies... So many of these posts are examples of abusive behaviour, so sad and sorry for all involved X
I didn't have the patience to get through all of them but from the ones I saw, I agree. Some of these parents have no business have children under their care.
Load More Replies... Too bad people aren't required to study and pass a test before being allowed to have children.
I had to go through more scrutiny to get an abandoned dog from a rescue than 2 adults who decide to make a new human.
Load More Replies... Okay, I couldn’t even get through the first 10. This is one of the most horrific posts I’ve ever read on here. I hope all these people who grew up in these abusive situations are doing okay now. 😞❤️
As a parent I'm a firm believer in picking my battles - why would I make my life and theirs more difficult by making up stupid rules that have zero logic behind it? I'm pretty laid back as to what my kids are allowed but you can bet your a*s I expect them to be decent humans and show people respect - as to how much toilet roll I really don't care as long as I'm not dealing with skid marks, if they're hungry then eat, if your not then don't - I really don't understand why anyone has kids just to make their everyone's lives miserable - what is the freaking point?
These posts are all examples of horrible physical, emotional and sexual abuse. I hope these people are ok today.
This stuff is HORRIBLE. The only "rules" we have are: If you spill the salt, pour some over your left shoulder. If it's yellow, let it mellow, if it's brown, flush it down. Last one out locks the door. If you're going downstairs, take something down. If you're going up, take something up. If someone makes a particularly hilarious or incisive comment, you must high five them. No drinking directly from the jug. All these "rules" are agreed upon family rules, that are part of our family "folklore".
All these parents acting like they've been held ar gunpoint by their own future children's souls and been forced to conceive them. Uhm no, you deliberately decided to have kids (or your inconsiderate actions led to a pregnancy) and you have to raise them, provide for them, create for them a sane, healthy and positive environment, do everything for them to grow up and become functioning adults. Your kids shouldn't pay for their food or their basic hygiene products, feeding and clothing them is not a "gift" from your own part, that's not even the minimum standard... And those post, my friends are like the poster child (or whatever it's called) for the legalization of abortion, contraception and sex education. I wonder how many more kids will be born in a household where they are not wanted, maybe even hated... How will they be treated?
Agree with you on how kids don't owe their parents anything, etc. but society does push women in the direction of "settling down and having children." Going against that is something that takes effort and strength that some people don't have or want to muster. Hell, some people don't even realize it's an option, partly because of how they were raised by their parents. It doesn't excuse the behavior but I would argue many if not most people don't even consiously sit down and decide to have and raise children. Which is a huge problem and needs ro change.
Load More Replies... My first Stepdad was obese. He weighed 320lbs, and he hated me and my brothers, but I made sure he took it out on me. He would hit my mom because she wouldn't give us up for adoption. He would quickly burn me with his cigars, slap me for no reason and call me stupid and useless. He would stand on my back, crushing me. I lit a cigar he was holding When my youngest brother was born, his biological son, he got even nastier. He would punch me and slap me. On one occasion, hit put my hand in the gas cooker ring while it was lit because I passed him his lighter. I think I had coined the phrase Fat B*st*rd before Chubby Brown or Mike Myers. I also suffered from rage issues. I still do. I avoid fights and conflict because I escalate quickly and become very violent. Luckily, it triggers in defence and I never start a fight. One day, he kicked me over at the top of the stairs at home and jumped on my back. I snapped and stood straight up. I was 11 at the time, and he fell down the stairs.
He saw me screaming as I leapt down the stairs at him with both fists balled up and moved out of the way. The neighbour came rushing in thinking someone had broken into our house and was attacking us. It only ended when my mom finally snapped and smashed a pottery chicken over his head on new years eve at a party we were throwing and told him to get the f*ck out and told everyone what he did and does. The stories I could tell you would make your blood boil. He's dead now. I had a party with my brothers. We had cake
Load More Replies... You have to study, pass a test, and get a license to become a doctor, a layer, or a teacher. You have to study, pass a test, and get a license to drive a car. In most cases, you have to undergo periodic re-licensing or recertification to show that your skills have remained current. Yet we have none of those requirements to become a parent, even though unqualified people have the potential to ruin their children's lives, and possibly pass that ruination down for generations. What is wrong with this picture?
I kinda think therapy should be mandatory during pregnancy and a few years of the child's life. Sometimes it's nobody's fault that they don't know better, but people can absolutely be taught what's good for children and what isn't.
Load More Replies... Wow, where to begin. 1. I wasn't allowed to date while living at home but I also couldn't move out until I was married. Figure that one out. 2. If I cooked anything, I had to clean up before eating it and if my brothers were hungry and I want eating the food they could help themselves even if I was washing so I could eat it. That translates to cold food or no food if any of my brothers were home. 3. I couldn't make phone calls unless a parent approved and they were on the other line listening. I never called anyone since the answer was normally no or they were too busy to monitor it. 4. No changing your hair without permission. 5. No borrowing other people's clothes. I couldn't buy my own either. 6. No sports except the girl ones and they had to take me if they had time which they never did. So I got a little chubby which they ridiculed me for. These are just what come to mind. I've suppresses most of my childhood. I think the reasons for that are obvious.
i grew up with an abusive, mentally ill mother that was basically a combination of all of the above. i'm 51 years old now and to this day i still sometimes get nightmares. i am so sorry for all the things these people have had to endure
My heart goes out to all of these poor abused kids. I hope life is better.
As children, all food and drink had to be consumed sitting at the table except water. Only exception was special movie nights when we would have snacks and pop in front of the tv. As an adult, I still eat every meal sitting at the kitchen table. Keeps the house clean and the furniture unstained so I mostly think it’s a good rule.
Pinching. Like constantly. There was nothing inappropriate about it, just stupid. Father would pinch our forearms or lower back and simply thought it was funny we - me and my sister - squeeled and whimpered, thought it for some kind of prank. He came from a very abusive family which explains he never had a chance to see how to treat people nice, and he was otherwise mostly okay, but we never got this annoying habit out of him. Disgusted me so much I still don't do well with people behind my back or touching these parts of me (though otherwise I love to hug and cuddle) and myself, I never touched a person - or a pet as a matter of fact - otherwise than softly and with their consent.
This was Truly Sad to read & Breaks my heart 💔 to know so many have been hurt , traumatized and robbed of a childhood that was not Wonderful. So much Mental Illness & Cult behaviors. In tears I read this 😢 wishing there was a way for this disgusting reproduction of sick humans acting less than. 😔 it's horrible secrets to carry. And I an so very sorry. This is not even the tip of the truth. Evil effing people These are some truth we have learned , but Much More than we could ever know is out there happening Right now.💔
Not all parents can or should have kids But all kids need to have a good parent
Some people evidently have kids just so they have minions to boss around. That's so gross.
My mother, of blessed memory, was by and large great. However, if I went to a friend's house after school with a SAHM, I would call to let her know and she would always tell me to go back home....to an empty house....and wait there for hours for someone else to come home. I wish I could ask her what that was all about.
I don't understand how these people had the energy to be like this with kids.
This post wasn't what I was expecting. A?lot of these were abusive. Reed them all.
I don't let my kids in case there's a p3do there and no supervision-
My brother and sister and I couldn't even be in the yard when he cut grass. I didn't cut grass the first time until I almost 30. When a new theatre came to town, it was near our local airport. We could never go to that theatre because it was in the landing path of planes. (Funny thing, though, years after he passed, a small plane did crash right next to the airport.) I could go on and on, but those are my top two! I will admit, however, it has made me much more safety conscious, even though I have an irrational fear of fire and checking the mail on just about any road!
feel so sad reading these comments. while i would never call myself a perfect parent i could never institute most of these rules. i have one son. because i was aware that other parents didn't always supervise their kids i made my home welcoming for his friends as i could keep an eye on them. rules were simple: no alcohol/drugs/smoking/cussing. respect my house-don't break it. respect my dogs. pick up after yourself including son's room if you helped mess it up. and, just because i wanted to make sure they respected my rules one silly one: if you have a penis then no earrings. it was always a secret chuckle to see the boys filing in while they removed their earrings and put them in their pockets. of all the boys that spent time in m home only one violated the rules which banned him from the house. he was a good kid, he was sorry but i had to be firm. his mom even called to see if i would rescind my decision but i had to keep as an example. sorry lenny-you were still a good kid
I feel sorry for Lenny. Could you not have just given him a temporary "grounding" from your house? Lol
Load More Replies... Probably not. Abusive controlling parents exist everywhere.
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