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I hope that everyone agrees that not vaccinating your child is an ill way of parenting. Other parenting trends like letting kids do whatever they want and run amok like there’s no tomorrow are also questionable. But the subject matter is delicate, since we also like to believe that for the most part, parents know what’s best for their kids. Or do they?

Well, these two threads from Ask Reddit will shed some light on common parenting styles that are not necessarily healthy. In fact, people claim they’re everything but. “What is the worst parenting trend to date?” someone asked a while ago, and just recently a similar question popped up: "What parenting 'trend' do you strongly disagree with?"

Below we selected some thought-provoking arguments people shared in response to the questions. Also, let us know what parenting trend you don’t agree with in the comments below!

#1

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Y'all need to cut this anti-vaccination s**t out like right now. Vaccines save lives.

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MarmotArchivist
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This deserves it's place on top of the list. With the other things you'll have rude and uneducated kids that become entitled adults, but at least they get to become adults.

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There are as many parenting styles as there are parents, and there’s no universal recipe on how to raise your children. But because the current generation faces unprecedented challenges, it also requires tact and special behavior from parents to be able to keep up with the changing times and the increased demands of parenting and child-rearing.

#2

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers when ppl posts videos online of them punishing their kids. ex: “dad shaves girls head for txting boyfriend.” what in the sick hell kinda sh*t is that? and nobody seems to have a problem with that or thinks about how incredibly traumatic it’s going to be for that child. and the parents who do this literally make me sick. who is that for even? what are you trying to prove by humiliating your child in front of possibly thousands of ppl or more. ppl like this deserve to have their kids taken away. sorry not sorry.

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#3

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Not teaching manners with other people's pets. You want to pat my dog you f**king ASK, then you introduce yourself to her (back of your hand to sniff), THEN you may pat her. DO NOT harass her. My dog is a sweetheart but she is an animal and she is at exactly the right height to bite your little darlings face off and then its my fault and my dog dies because you couldnt teach your brat some manners.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/55fsjc/what_is_the_worst_parenting_trend_to_date/d8afsh8/ Report

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Kimi Tomminello
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This should be so much higher. I have kids. I have dogs. One of my dogs LOVES kids. Loves being ridden like a horse (120lb german shepherd) and having small children climbing all over him. The other one is terrified of kids, luckily he has a very mean bark and isn't confrontational. He puffs himself up, barks as loud as he can and retreats backwards while barking. It's enough to scare them off. It's the parents not the kids or my dog. *EDIT* hey look it's number 2 now 😁

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The coronavirus pandemic and political turmoil and war we see in Europe right now, as well as the inflation reaching sky highs all bring their own kind of uncertainty. For this reason, many parents are reevaluating the common parenting tactics previous generations took for granted.

Communicating trauma and being open about difficulties is one such new trend we see among parents. Another new style emerging is that more and more parents choose to provide their kids with experiences instead of material gifts. This is how you create memorable experiences and establish a better bond with your kid.

#4

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Not teaching basic manners and giving them a ridiculous sense of entitlement.

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Laura Edwards
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes! That kid is your diamond, great! He/she is a pain in my butt. I do not live your diamond.

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#5

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Shielding children from the natural consequences of their actions. They don't learn from their mistakes and the consequence price tags are so much higher when they become adults.

MissElphie , Allen Taylor Report

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Fitz_N_Fartz
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How I was taught and how I taught my daughter. Do not be afraid from making mistakes, just make sure you learn from the experience in not repeating them.

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#6

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers I hate when parents get mad at me for telling off their kids. I work in hospitality and we have a bowl of mints at the bar with tongs to grab them out. One night these three kids, all under age 10 but old enough to know better, just started diving their hands into the bowl. I told them politely to use the tongs, then I told them off when they ignored my request. The parents got mad at me instead of their kids, even though their kids just made me throw out a whole bowl of mints. If you're incapable of disciplining your child properly, don't get upset when someone else does it for you.

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LagoonaBlueColleen
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

YES. It takes a village to raise a child and parents should expect that village will need to reprimand your kid once in a while.

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But no matter what new trends emerge in parenting, one very common flaw will probably outlive them all. And you guessed it… it’s spoiling kids. In fact, over half this survey of 1,125 parents with kids between 4 and 10 confessed that they spoil their children too much. Another 2 in 5 go even further, saying they’re sometimes “embarrassed by how selfish their child acts.”

Spoiled kids don’t get to know and feel what it is like to be grateful, as gratitude is not something that children acquire automatically. It needs to be nurtured, in an age-appropriate way, but the more they get used to getting their way easily, the harder it is to turn them around.

#7

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Parent of teens here! All of my kids have had a friend that stayed the night at our house because the friend missed curfew at home and wasn't allowed in the house. I don't get it. Punishing the kid for missing curfew is totally acceptable. But not letting them in their own house in the middle of the night? What good can possibly come from that? My own kids rarely missed their curfew but when they did, they knew that they could come home, to a safe place, and face the consequences the next day.

notcreative1001 , Mike Hauser Report

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GirlFriday
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree with this 1000%. I woke up one morning and saw the neighbor's kid asleep on the porch. When I went to see if he was OK, he told me he missed curfew and was locked out for the night. That is so horrible!

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#8

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Gender reveal parties.

sunfloweries , kgroovy Report

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Tamra Stiffler
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I get that parents-to-be are excited about their new lives and as long as they aren't setting fires or making a huge mess of things, then go for it. Just understand that most people aren't nearly as invested as you are in your future child's sex. This would be the second most boring social event, right behind the baby shower. Only my opinion.

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#9

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Beauty Pageants. I have no problem with them it's just that the age these parents make their kids enter and the s**t they do to try to win like doping them up on sugar and energy drinks. Using spray tans and makeup on kids that are sometimes 1-2 years old! And in the end they extort their child for little to no monetary gain. I've seen parents neglect their other kids in favor of the pagent queen. And in the end you get a spoiled brat that throws a hissy fit and is disrespectful. But who cares, you spent 15k to win 5k and you're on TLC

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So in order to find out more about how being spoiled in childhood may affect your adult life, we spoke with Lynn How, the author of “Positive Young Mind'' and life coach who specializes in supporting educators, parents, and children with improving and prevention of mental health issues. She also runs this Facebook teacher coaching group which is an excellent resource for teachers in need of support when leaving, changing their mindset, changing their schools or setting healthy work/life boundaries.

“Do you know anyone who has trouble keeping their emotions in check when they don’t get their own way?” Lynn said and added that it may be that they were spoilt as a child and this hasn’t done them any favors as they move into their adult life.

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#10

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers "Boys will be boys".

SunflowerSorrow , Thomas Ricker Report

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chaotic_charlie (they/he)
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

this should be used when boys are doing something like putting hot dogs on the slide, not for s3xual h@rassment (edit: ty all SO MUCH for the upvotes!!!)

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#11

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Unschooling. I agree that kids should have some sort of say in what they learn - if your kid is really interested in, say, bugs, then by god you take them to every bug museum you can find and buy them all the bug books - BUT kids should have a basic curriculum whether they're interested in it or not. I get that most kids don't like math, or history, or the "boring" classes, but I strongly disagree with the unschooling attitude of "my kid does not want to learn it, so I won't make them."

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Hex Gurls
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

yea cuz unless they’re gonna live in the woods forever away from society they need to know math and how to write

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#12

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Parents never telling their children "no" and refusing to set any boundaries.

I get empowering children by giving them a voice in decision-making and the freedom to speak their minds, but general social norms would be nice.

Listening to 8 year olds throw fits in public and being rude to family and strangers (at top volume) is not endearing in any way.

DG4z , Allen Taylor Report

“These children may turn into adults who show less resilience when things go wrong and they may give up easily when things aren’t working out. Also, they want it all and they want it now whereas most adults can tolerate delayed gratification,” she explained.

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#13

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Videoing kids at their worst moments and then posting it on social media.

Applesintheorchard , Nenad Stojkovic Report

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RandomFrog
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A very distant relative of mine has a YouTube channel with her unschooled kids, and they’re always crying in the back or telling her to stop the camera and it’s just insane that she still posts it

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#14

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Taking youth sports too seriously.

I helped with and attended games for years, and can count on one hand the number of times I saw a child lose their temper. Parents lost it all the time. More than once I've seen a parent have to be physically restrained.

Scrappy_Larue , KeithJJ Report

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Iggy
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Those parents need to be banned from attending. They can wait in the car park.

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#15

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Ear piercing babies. That pisses me off. Let them decide. Don't put your vanity onto your baby. ESPECIALLY with piercing guns.

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Jayne Kyra
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Had my ears pierced as a baby. Now I have 6 in one ear, 4 in the other (including a Daith piercing). And tattoos. Hehe, maybe I can blame it on not having a choice when I was a kid. The rest were my choice and my decision.

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Moreover, “other traits that they may display include a lack of independence as their problems were generally solved for them, an inability to take criticism as nothing they did badly would invoke the appropriate feedback and the idea that everything should just come to them easily without too much work.”

“This last point is also coupled with a huge sense of disappointment when it doesn’t work out. All in all, this doesn’t set a child up to have positive relationships or good mental health as an adult.”

#16

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Making a kid finish their plate.

SmoSays , Virginia State Parks Report

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Jo Johannsen
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also, keep in mind serving size for a 5yo should be much smaller than a teenager or adult. If it doesn't satisfy, let them have a bit more, but never force food on kids.

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#17

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers taking the door off their room. i have neverrrrr understood this

tundradutches , Family Handyman Report

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CV Vir
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My kid had diagnosed mental health issues, and would often slam the door repeatedly. In a small house, this can be very loud indeed. Along with therapy, etc, we took the door away for a few months. Had a fabric door curtain for some privacy.

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#18

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Family vloggers. Growing up in front of a camera can be so damaging for a child. Don't even get me started on the child labour it is - using young kids to earn money isn't good parenting in my opinion.

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Bob Belcher
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ryan's toy review. I remember the first time seeing it after my daughter told me about it. I had to explain to her that not everyone gets to go on vacation every month. Now I see that kid and he looks tired and miserable.

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There are many different challenges a spoiled child is likely to face while growing up. “A lack of appropriate boundaries can be very confusing for a child and although on the outside, these children can seem argumentative and rude, this stems from a lack of self-confidence on the inside as they have not been given these tools,” Lynn explained.

“Once their safety blanket of the parents spoiling them has been removed, coping on their own would bring on anxiety which could manifest itself as a tantrum,” she added.

#19

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers I think those parents who impose a raw vegan diet on their young kids - there is no way that a child can sustain itself on a raw vegan diet - you'd need to be constantly eating to get the necessary calories.

Vegetables and fruit are very high in fibre - both soluble and non-soluble - so you can be very full from relatively few calories compared with even a high-protein diet.

Vegan can be a struggle if the parent doesn't do the research. And a raw diet can be done as an adult, but it would still be difficult.

A raw vegan diet for a young child is basically child abuse.

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Donna Webber
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ohhhhh gaaaawd; a vegan parent; Dont force your kids to eat a sh1tty vegan diet

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#20

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Modern day: Parents assuming that once a child hits school age that it's the schools responsibility to raise them. These same parents then get angry when their child is punished by the school.
See this FAR too often.

mrbios , 14995841 Report

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Evelyn Ann
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

One of my best friends is an English teacher to 7-9th graders and..THIS. she doesn't get emails or calls from parents on how to help their kids learn. She gets angry emails about a child getting zeros on grades for not turning in homework. Emails stating "that was obviously A level work, all their other teachers gave them an A". In spelling and grammar there is only one correct way, there is rarely room for interpretation! After ten years of teaching she is rethinking her career choice. Not because of the children, because of the parents. She can't discipline a student who threw a desk at her twice. It's definitely a modern thing, my mom would have dragged me out of principal's office by my ear. This child's parent said she "misunderstood his actions".

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#21

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Coddling sons while holding daughters to higher standards.

Ramen_Noodles_4567 , Xavier Mouton Photographie Report

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SCP-3998
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wild f*****g thought here; TREAT YOUR KIDS EQUALLY REGARDLESS OF WHAT SEX THEY ARE. This s**t damaged me and my siblings so much. The son was the golden child, the girls were all but ignored. This s**t needs to stop

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Moreover, Lynn argues that “often these children will have friendship issues as they find it challenging to let others have their own way and they may find it difficult to form positive relationships with other adults such as teachers due to difficulty with conformity.” She concluded that overall this adds up to a childhood that is more challenging than it needs to be.

#22

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Posting intimate pics of your kid all over social media.

Now, I have no issue with parents sharing adorable baby pics. Hell, I don't mind you guys sharing a lot of them. When you go through hell and back to carry, birth, and raise the kid, you get a pass on the social media sharing, somewhat.

HOWEVER, sharing pics of your kid in the bathtub and doing bodily functions is not okay. 1) It's gross. I don't think your kid's blowout diaper or "first poopy in the toilet" is funny or cute. I don't want that on my timeline. 2) Pedos are out there, be careful. 3) I know it's hard to imagine, but little Peighsyn is gonna be a big boy someday. In fact, he may even be on social media in the future. His friends (AND EMPLOYERS) are gonna see those gross vomit and poop pics. Not a good idea.

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2x4b523p
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My sister in law keeps posting pictures of her daughters doing everyday kid activities, but what shocks me most are the comments. Every day there is at least one person commenting “wow so sexy” or other version of “sexy” on a picture where her daughters pose for the camera. It’s usually her female friends commenting and she replies things like “aww thank you” or such. Who the hell thinks a 5 year old is sexy? And what mother isn’t alarmed by such comments??

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#23

Maybe not the worst, but my parents forced me to play competitive sports for years when I clearly hated it and I'm still a little bitter. I was horrible at soccer, they even offered me 10 bucks for every goal I scored but I still couldn't do it. As an adult I still shudder a little every time I drive by a baseball field, thinking about how much time I wasted there and the embarrassment of sucking at something and getting laughed at by the other kids. This isn't to say I wasn't an athletic kid, I loved skating, riding bikes, hiking and all that. Parents - if your kid isn't good at a sport, doesn't have any interest in it and obviously has no talent for it, please don't make them do it.

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LagoonaBlueColleen
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My dad and his wife did this with their sons. I kid you not, they were forced to quit hockey and soccer due to damaged knees, shoulders and backs when they were in their teens.

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Cherreka Wirth
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The only exception to this rule is swimming. EVERY child should take swimming lessons. I put both my kids in swimming, then when they got good enough I felt confident they weren't going to die in deep water waiting for an adult to reach them, I gave them the option to quit. They both chose to stay in.

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rn42
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Learning swimming is not a competitive sport. That's like saying teaching your kid to ride a bike should be an exception to this.

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Wednesday
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My son was very good at baseball and had a wicked curve and slider (southpaw pitcher!!!) and I love baseball. But, when he came to me and said he didn't really want to play, I told him it was fine. Not my life, after all. Just asked him what he DID want to do, and told him to go do that.

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Kate Jones
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We should stop forcing kids to do any activities that are supposed to be fun on them. I get not wanting your child to be a lazy blob sitting in their room and not having friends or a direction at all. I truly understand that. But at least try to make them a part of the decision on what they can get into. If they like games, have them get into a gaming club or something where they will socialize a little bit. Or if they like guitar, don't make them learn a different instrument because you happen to like it more. Find what they're interested in and try to veer them toward it in a meaningful way. Trying to force your kids to being some sports star is so antiquated and can cause way more harm than good.

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Rida Neil
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even doing as much as inviting your kid to go on walks or bike rides with you and/or their siblings and encouraging them to be active even if it's nothing demanding is better than doing nothing or forcing them to do sports they aren't interested in.

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Trash Panda
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My mother forced me to run track and cross country as punishment for being smarter than when she was my age, more beautiful, and yet still having Marfans Syndrome. She considered me an embarrassment, and rubbed my nose raw in it. I was statistically the worst in the entire state, and I still hate my body so much. She told me constantly I should do the impossible and be great at it. That it was my fault, and I hurt her somehow. I felt completely defective, and inhuman, like I was a burden to my family, and a waste of God’s creativity. Like it was my fault, and it must’ve been some kind of sinfulness in me, that I wasn’t worthy to be treated like a human being. My parents dehumanized me every day. They’re complete psychos who should just drink themselves to death already. At least God isn’t. God spent years trying to tell me it was never my fault.

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James016
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My son has little interest in football but he does enjoy the martial arts classes he goes to. Even then it's not specifically to learn martial arts but more for building up his core strength as he is extremely hypermobile.

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Sarah Gideon
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yep. A child is not for a parent to live vicariously through- they are their own young people, and our job is to support, nurture, and parent them, not force them to fit some idea *we* have of what we want them to be interested in. Smh. My dad did this to us, and I liked sports thankfully, but my brother HATED them and had terrible anxiety - it was abusive imo. He committed suicide at 22.

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Kevin Cumblidge
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have no idea what physical education is like these days but in the 70's, it consisted of segments, each being a different sport-gymnastics, baseball, track and field, football, basketball, etc. and one was required to participate in the different "sports of the month" to receive a passing grade for PE. Forced participation with no choice for alternative PE options was hell for the uncoordinated - being picked last for teams, being the butt of jokes, bullying, etc. In my case, it turns out I had undiagnosed ADHD and one of the manifestations was poor fine motor skills. Gross motor skills can swing a bat, throw a ball but it's the fine motor skills that enable one to actually hit the ball or throw a ball accurately. I am physically active but there are some sports and activities that I just suck at. The non-existence of alternative choices made my highschool life miserable so I finally just quit going. Not showing up for PE and taking the F was the less traumatic option.

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Susan Schlee
Community Member
10 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I HATED P.E. If I was playing a game with just my friends, or running around on the playground- that was fine. Forcing me to run and exercise and participate in sports I hate and also suck at is why I don't do ANY form of exercise today- except for walking.

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Camille Sinanan
Community Member
10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remeber Doign Softball for three years, And I absoulutley loved it. My first year, for like the first half of the season, I was horrible. And to make it worse, i ahd a girl on my team named Berkley, who was also my school bully- Saying, You dint try, or, you suck, and rarely, get off my team, because her dad was a coach. Although the next half and my second year, me and my team were the best ones. Although, those were the memories of 8yu. When I got to 9 yu, It was the worst. I hit one ball that season, never made a run, and never got anyone out. It was hard. And I was on a team with Berkley again. I quit softball for like two years after that. I played again in 12yu, and then my softball game started again.

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Elycia Clemans
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah I am requiring my kids to do an extracurricular activity starting by middle school. Any extracurricular of THEIR choice. Football? Cool. Chess club? Also cool. ROTC, little league, photography, student council, martial arts, swim, I don't care. I just expect them to expand their horizons. They want to do 5 things? Great. I will help them figure out how to balance their schedule. The only do one? Thank you. I'm happy with that too. All I ask is they are involved with SOMETHING and if they start it, they are expected to finish out the season/year/course before deciding to give it up.And they have to pick a replacement for the next year if that was their only one.

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Lori Lewis
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I absolutely agree, kids should be allowed to develop and participate in their own interests, they shouldn't be forced to live your life over for you

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Adam Leviness
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wouldn't force a child to play sports, but I would make them pick up extra curricular. Whether that is sports, band, karate, a book club, dancing, or an after school job(at the appropriate age) is up to them but they would have to pick up and try out new things and stick with it for the season or however long the commitment to the team/group is.

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Gladys Hayes Southerland
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Stop trying to live out your fantasies thru your kids. I'm Sorry You Were A klutz at school sports but if your child does not want to play sports in school, is okay. they will be successful in life anyway

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Ken Van Egdon
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hated every team sport I ever played, but I'm grateful that my parents made me finish out the season with the team. I didn't have to renew, but I had to finish my commitment, and I have a strong teamwork ethic because of it even thiugh I hated sports.

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carmen banks
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I see so many parents trying to live their dreams through the children. It urks my nerves when kids are force into it or feel they have to do it for the parents sake. I always let my girls and grandkids try it and finish it out cause it does cost to play. But if it wasn't for them that was that. Try something else that may enjoy.

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Janet Birckhead
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If parents want their children involved in a group activity, there are many alternatives: drama and dance classes, children's choir, and, for older kids, school activiities like band, chorus, or debate club. But, if the kid is athletic but prefers a different sport or prefers individual sports to team sports, let him or her have at if! (And cheer him/her on!) Your child can find cooperative opportunities in group projects in school or a family charitable activity, or even in the family cleaning the house or washing the car together. Don't force your child to keep doing something he or she hates! Your child will encounter that experience often enough in life without you adding deliberately creating such a situation.

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Fancy that
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My son was a great baseball player and but player and there was a coach who scouted him to play on a travelingly at age 12. I said no way and I took him to Egypt jet and Spain and Italy and Italy and Israel not summer. Today he is a sports and performance psychologist.

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Fancy that
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My son went to school with with a kid like this. It was 1996. It was new and I didn't know what to do. It was so sad and depressing.

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Ambry Petersen
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I agree in letting a kid try a sport to see if they like it or not, but I don't believe they should be forced to go. Although I do believe in teaching them certain survival skills. We always put the kids in swimming lessons and a summer or two of our church camps where they learn those skills. However that's not for sports or a childhood long activity. ( unless said child decides the love it and asks for it to be so).

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Laura Mandado Cacho
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ugh, I hate people that do that, let your kid chose what they want to do with their free time

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Sandra Givens
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes, encouraging your kids to try new things is fine, but pushing them into activities they hate is not. If they hate soccer or piano lessons, let them swim or do art. I did not play sports outside of school, one brother played Little League ball, one liked swimming but not other sports (but became a licensed outdoor guide as an adult), and my sister went her own way, a skilled seamstress and home decorator.

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Matt Kough
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you're over 18 and bitter, then it's on you. Suck it up and move on, or don't. Live in your little hovel of misery and play victim.

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Craig Reynolds
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This applies to musical instruments as well. Do NOT force your kid to take music lessons because YOU think they should become a concert cellist, pianist, or anything else. If they have an interest they will discover it on their own. Oh, and if they do discover it on their own let them study, practice, and progress at their own pace. Do NOT attempt to take control or force your will on them. That is the quickest way to make them hate something they actually liked.

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Kara Smith
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My parents always allowed us to try what ever we wanted, but if there was a financial commitment we had to finish out the season they paid for, and then we could decide to stop or not. Because of that when i was little i did dance baseball soccer and karate, by the time i graduated highschool i focused heavily on dance, did soccer for fun not competitive, swam for fitness and focused on my other performing arts. Now at 33, i teach dance love swimming and taichi for relaxation, and wish i had the time to put my son in soccer too. I got to explore, be fit, well rounded, and understood that decisions have costs and consequences, and how to make choices based on my true passions.

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DeAnne Thomas
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The same with music or art classes. I loved sports but had absolutely no desire to learn to play an instrument. The school made me endure that for years in order to graduate. Did they think that I would be unable to have a successful career if I didn’t know how to play a tuba or clarinet?

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Al Padilla
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Amen! Some people enjoy physical activity but detest the pressure and baggage that comes with competitive sports. The same might even apply to non-athletic activities, like chess. Maybe you just don't get off on trouncing your opponent.

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Stymied Egan
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't force your kids to do anything if they tell you they hate it. I was a Girl Scout for 5 years. It was awful. The leaders only paid attention to their girls, the rest of us were on our own. The activities were all about what their daughters liked. My mother kept insisting I would like it, give it one more year.

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Susanne B
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I wonder why they would do so. What did they expect to come of it

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XRaine
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

my parents did this my whole life, and now I just hate exercising. Ive been signed up for so many things that I hated for "character development". you got your character development: I have depression and can't enjoy anything anymore.

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Maggie Dinzler Shaw
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All kids should have one personal sport or exercise activity chosen by the child and not competitive.

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Alisha Schumacher
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I always wanted to play soccer and many said I had something, i just needed some training. As soon as i said that to my mom, she didnt really forbit it, but she found a way to make it unreachable for me. So im stuck on sports and clubs where i only am like 2 years and then i do something new. Im still a bit sour for that, because i still love soccer but i dont think its a good idea to start with it now, i got exhausting work to do now with 16.

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Bettie-Jean Neal
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same goes for music/playing an instrument. If they try hard and even practice every day and still suck at it AND break out in hives all over the inside of their wrists on lesson day, let them stop. Don't continue to force them to go to lessons. To this day I have an issue with just hearing a piano.

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Winter's Dream
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I was a teen, my dad constantly harped about my weight. He made me join church softball. I'm 50+ and I still hate Thursdays

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Sherri Mantooth Bagwell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Dad did the same with me. Tall lanky girl in Indiana MUST play basketball! Nevermind I was into art, music, played flute in the band. I tried out, didn't make the team (No shock there!) 35yrs after his death my sister has said he crushed my spirit as a sensitive, creative child. I haven't let that effect me as an adult, but it sure did as a child.

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isa alves
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

same for music, of course you can introduce your children to music/sports or whatever, but dont force them to do something they dont want to, also BE OPEN TO THEM AND TALK TO THEM ABOUT WHAT THEY LIKE AND DISLIKE SO YOU WILL KNOW IF THEY LIKE IT OR NOT

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Deb Dedon
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some kids are competitive and some aren't. There's nothing wrong with solitary sports. Pressuring kids to compete is about the parent(s), not the kid.

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Pat Fisher
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My (68f) cousin (67m) Pop Warnered everything. At 12 his knees were trashed. He has been a homeless addict for many decades. He contacts family less than once a year.

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#24

Not giving kids privacy or personal space. I have teenagers and unless they give me a reason not to trust them, I don’t rummage around in their rooms or secretly read their texts.

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FABULOUS1
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't violate my kids personal space. Well they are adults now but still didn't do it while they were younger, but I also don't violate my wife's personal space either. I really dislike hearing people talking about going through their kids and spouses phones, wallets and other things, these people lack boundaries.

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#25

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Not dressing your kids like kids.

Also raising your kids on YouTube/Instagram/TikTok before they're old enough to decide how much privacy they want in their lives.

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Jude Fire
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Like , when you decide to give your kid a whole makeover with your makeup and then wonder why they dont like the way they look without it.

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#26

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Shielding their kid from failure. There are so many people now that are afraid of failing, so much so, that they don't even attempt something new if they have a hint that they may fail at it.

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Raven Sheridan
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If a kid can't learn how to cope with failure, they turn into an adult man-child, who falsely claims that they had an election stolen from them!

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#27

Not saying a word about sexuality and shielding children from any sort of affection on tv or in real life.

I can't stress enough how much this has contributed to my intense shame whenever I masturbate and my inability to be intimate. Of course this is a compounded issue for me personally but such a censored childhood was the backbone for all of this pain.

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L Melville
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Additionally....using "pet names" for your child's anatomy/genitals and not understanding why this is problematic/dangerous. If your child tells the teacher that uncle Tom licked their "cookie"....the teacher may not understand the SIGNIFICANCE of this confession. Teach kids the proper words for parts of their body.

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#28

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Taking your kids to the pub with you on a weekend.

I'm not talking an afternoon lunch with a glass of wine or two. I'm talking about kids being left to run amok in car parks and on pavements while parents sit inside and have a drink.

Look after your f**king kids.

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#29

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers People having their kids stay up with them until the wee hours of the morning. By 11pm they are cranky, fussy, and clearly tired.

Put. Your. Kids. To. Bed.

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Dagny White
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why would you even do that? It was hard for my parents to put me to bed. Sleep is really important, especially at this young age.

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#30

Pushing your kids to bring home flawless reports. Had a friend my sophomore year of highschool (straight A student, extra curricular stuff) with strict parents obviously living vicariously through her- who blew her head off with her dad's shotgun sitting at the kitchen table because it was near finals week, her grades were plummeting and the only boyfriend she's ever had had just broken up with her 3 days prior. I'd like to introduce a new parenting trend; Talking to your kids, listening and understanding.

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whodunnitfan2013
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ugh, my parents had unrealistic expectations for me like the friend mentioned. I almost took my life plenty of times. I even would contemplate suicide when I didn't make my parents look perfect.

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#31

Not knocking “because what if the kid is secretly running a highly illegal business in there” Like please, knock. It will save you and your kids from discomfort.

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Jessica Wood
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Illegal business? What, do they think their teenager is running a drug ring from their bedroom?

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#32

Taking your kid's side when he's being an a****le to strangers. DO your job and educate your kid so I don't have to punch him in the face.

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Meg G
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't think punching a kid in the face is a good idea, even if they are being a little s**t. Some of the posts have anger issues.

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#33

Weird religious homeschooling.

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Jes
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Social skills are not learned through homeschooling. This must be compensated for somehow. It is hard

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#34

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Publicly shaming your kids. If you do that s**t you are an as****le and a disgusting human being.

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Madeleine Flowers
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

*If you do that s**t ON PURPOSE you are an as****le. If your kids do something incredibly stupid (like run in front of a moving car, or something like that) then go for it, they deserve it.

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#35

Never listening to your child. The whole children need to be seen and not heard schtick, f**ked up my social skills a whole lot with my parents and people.

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LagoonaBlueColleen
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Same. I was raised to be compliant and always caring about what other people think. Likely why I feel the need to comment on social media on a daily basis. .... sorry for my constant ramblings.

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#36

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers My aunt and uncle are and have been huge supporters of the "if you just give them a video game then they'll be quiet forever" so my 6-year old cousin has absolutely no social skills and is a difficult, struggling first grader but is alright at playing Angry Birds and Minecraft.

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Stephanie A Mutti
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Tossing a phone to a kid any time there is a wait. I get the desire to keep busy while waiting but we don't learn patience without practice

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#37

Wanting to be "friends" with their kids. It really pisses me off. Parents that won't challenge, question or correct poor behaviour.

I've got three boys to raise and my attitude has always been - I'm your dad. I'm not your friend. I have friends you have friends. We can be friends when you're old enough to buy me a beer and I've done the sort of parenting that means I want to have a beer with you.

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Random Panda
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't know, my parents were our friends and still disciplined us. There's a middle ground between the two situations described here. I don't like parents like OP.

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#39

Non-parenting. That is, when people have kids but let their kids run wild with zero effort put into actually raising them into functional members of society.

Homeschooling. Frequently it just means non-schooling. Either the parent in question does not have the ability to teach, due to lack of education on their own part, has no intention of teaching with it all just falling back into non-parenting, or it's a deliberate attempt by fundies to keep their kids from getting an education. There are few exceptions.

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MantisGirl15
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Homeschooling, when done right, is amazing. I was brought up homeschooled and I'm in a much better place academically than I would have been had I grown up in public school. Unschooling is the problem, as well as parents who want to homeschool but don't take responsibility for their children's education.

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#40

Someone Asks “What Is The Worst Parenting Trend To Date?” And People Give 40 Perfectly Blunt Answers Infant circumcision. Sorry but unneeded cosmetic surgery performed on non consenting minors is just stupid, useless, and illogical.

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Dianellian
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My first son (34) is uncircumcised however my second son (16)had to be at 3 due to constant infections and pain. Don’t criticise.

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