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“I Started A Dumpster Fire”: 25 Big Ways Folks Messed Up That They’ll Only Reveal On Their Deathbed
Everything in this world, good and bad, eventually comes to the same end. And after many years (let's hope that after many), in the face of the inevitable and unknown, we finally admit what we once did, long ago, and for which we have been incredibly regretful for many years and even decades.
In fact, none of us are sinless, and each of us has a story behind us (and some have more than one) where our actions were as far from the moral ideal as Shedeur Sanders - from the first pick in the NFL draft. But some are still willing to share these stories online - of course, on the condition of complete anonymity.
More info: Reddit
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#1
I pushed the school bully off the top of the big slide, he broke his arm and no one believed him when he accused me cause I was a 5yrs younger, tiny and a good kid, and I’ve never regretted it.
RELATED:
#2
I had a really troubled childhood and drank a lot in high school and first three years of college. HEAVY. I am no longer that person. But anyway, senior year of high school I went to a concert with friends and got so messed up I got kicked out of the concert. My friends stayed and I guess my plan was to sleep it off in the car - I didn’t do that. I have vague memories of running around the surrounding neighborhood knocking on peoples doors (? Who knows why honestly) and I remember one very sweet family answered the door sat me in their living room gave me water while I sobbed (? Again why) and they called the cops to deal with me. I’m lucky this was not current times where people are not always so nice. The cop called my parents they picked me up. I am still too this day so mortified about my nonsense impeding on this family late at night. I pray only good things for that family every day.
#3
I was using the laundromat at my university's dorms, and one of my tops fell half out making the door not sealed but still locked.
Long story short, the place was flooded, I tried stopping the machine, but couldn't, I tried calling the number of the machine, no one answered.
I tried to clean it but didn't have anything to do it with so when the machine finished I took my clothes abd skedaddled out of there.
This selection of ours is based on this thread in the AskReddit community, where a couple of days ago the user u/deadend-decendant asked netizens: "What’s the worst f**k up you’ve had that you’ll admit on your death bed?"
Of course, some of the hundreds of stories told here (out of a total of 2.8K comments) were obviously made up, but most of those we picked seem 100% true. And over 9.5K upvotes in the original thread only emphasize its virality.
#4
Literally every relationship before therapy.
It took me far too long to realize that if everyone smells like s**t, I should check my own shoes.
#5
I got blamed for pushing a guy down the stairs after he tried to fight me. Had a few witnesses back me up saying he slipped. Ended up in a wheelchair for a while.
I pushed him.
#6
Tried to unclog a toilet at a party. Made it worse. Blamed it on a guy who left before me. Everyone still calls him “Sh*tstorm Steve.” Sorry, Steve.
Most of the stories presented in this collection really don't present the storytellers favorably, and some of them are simply embarrassing. In some of the situations described, people simply shifted their own blame onto others (and then, years and years later, wanted to apologize to them). In some - they simply created a huge mess - sometimes just funny.
But a separate category is made up of stories where a person, for one reason or another, caused pain and suffering to another one. For example, by leaving their significant others or treating them badly - for a completely insignificant reason or for no reason at all. But then, years and years later, people do regret it.
#7
I once hit “Reply All” on a company-wide email... to complain about the company.
Spent the next 2 hours updating my resume and sweating through my soul.
#8
Leaving Cathy. She was a good person, kind, generous and caring. I was an a*****e at the time and very much into me. I regret it every single day and wish I could tell her how sorry I am.
Update - wow I'm totally blown away by the responses to this. To those who have, thank you.
Quick summary. I'm very happy in my current relationship and Cathy is and always will be my greatest f**k-up and regret til the day I die. She didn't deserve the way I treated her when we broke up.
To one commenter, yeah she probably doesn't want to see me ever again and maybe she doesn't want to be found. Honestly, I wouldn't blame her.
To Cathy. I don't have the words to express how sorry I am for how I treated you. I can't begin to imagine how you felt that day and I realized too late that nobody, especially you, should ever be treated like that. I wish you happiness.
#9
I know a funeral director that accidentally cremated someone that wanted to be buried.
"What is good news is that people still realize their mistakes, even after a long time," says Maria Kryvosheeva, a psychologist and NLP coach, with whom Bored Panda got in touch for a comment here. "And, as we all perhaps know, recognizing and accepting your own mistake is the first step to solving the problem. Even if it's just an anonymous online thread."
"After all, none of us are perfect, we all make mistakes. And what we may consider incredibly funny or completely harmless to other people quite possibly becomes the cause of serious trauma for them. So it is always worth thinking of the possible consequences of your actions."
#10
In 3rd grade I said something to a kid that was in trouble that made him go off even more, I think he got expelled and I don’t remember what I said exactly. I’m sorry Troy :(.
#11
A lot of people clogging toilets, g*****n.
Anyway, I was 4 yrs old and set fire to some weeds near my grandparents house and almost burned the whole farm down. The fire fighters came and put everything out, took them awhile to combat the blaze. They put it out and absolutely no one asked me anything, cause I was 4, I guess. I wonder if my grandparents knew to an extent. Probably.
Beak Hookage 7 months ago
I blame the morons who didn't keep whatever it was this kid used out of their reach.
#12
Ruined a relationship with a perfect girl back in 2000 as I was trying to get my foot in the door towards the UFC. Was training like a mad man, messed myself up in the head real good and just distanced myself from everyone. Ended up getting 2nd place in a major tournament (needed first to advance) and tore my shoulder. My journey ended there. Broken, defeated and lost the one person who cared about me the most. Still think about her to this day.
"In addition, everyone has a completely different sense of humor - and what may seem funny and laughable to you, for others, may become a reason for emotional experience and suffering. Therefore, the 'first think, and then do or say,' rule is always relevant. And especially in many situations described here," Maria concludes.
Experts also believe that many thoughtless and irrational actions are caused by narratives that live inside us: for example, the fear of being called out or punished for doing (or not doing) something, the fear of being alone when leaving a toxic relationship, or the desire to get some attention, even if it's negative, from others.
#13
My dog got sprayed by a skunk when I was in middle school and he rubbed a bit against my backpack when he ran in freaking out. I tried to not bring the backpack to school but I had so much stuff that I had no choice and my mom was having none of it. The lockers at school were in bays so they were backed up against each other. I shoved the backpack in my locker when it was empty and it got a lot of attention from students and faculty for how bad the smell was. The smell was blamed on these two popular girls who had their locker backed up against mine. As their bay had most of the scent for some reason. I pulled my backpack out later and it hardly smelled at all for some reason. Almost as if the skunk stank literally drifted from my bag to their locker. Never got caught for it.
#14
I was 14 at a baby shower and there was a little girl (probably 5) and her mom who sat next to me, this was when filters on Snapchat were popular and kids love filters so we started to play with them. Well there was a bald filter, I did it on me and she laughed so I did it on her, the mom saw it and said “oh she probably doesn’t like that, she used to have cancer so seeing the bald head makes her sad” oh. my. gosh. I’m actually cringing typing this out I feel like a terrible person.
#15
When I was in 5th grade, my friend brought a pretty powerful magnet to school.
We then found out it messes with the monitors if you gloss over it real quick with the magnet.
We did this to the entire computer lab. Had no idea it broke the monitors and we never spoke about it again after that lmao.
Therefore, it's vitally important to be able to recognize such narratives in your life and distinguish them from rational patterns of behavior, but at the same time, to not succumb to excessive feelings of guilt.
"Hold yourself accountable for the decisions/actions you regret, but don’t beat yourself up. That doesn’t help anyone," Evan Shopper, LICSW, a therapist, writer, and parenting educator in Western Massachusetts, writes in his dedicated article on Psychology Today.
"Instead, be curious about yourself and explore what narratives are interfering with how and who you want to be in the world."
#16
I stole a kids playset once.
Answered an ad on craigslist to pickup free kids wooden playhouse/swingset. Got the street right but must have gotten the house numbers mixed up. Pulled up to a house I thought was it, knocked on the door and no one answered, disassembled the playground and threw it in the trailer.
Several hours later I got an email from the Craigslist person b******g that I never showed up.
EDIT: no I never gave it back. I never responded to the email. Too much embarrassment. All i did was go back a couple weeks later and confirm my screw up. The house still had an empty mulch pit from their missing set. I do remember seeing a bunch of small kids toys in their yard and thought it strange they were getting rid of their playhouse. To this day my wife and kids have no idea they are playing on stolen goods. I’ve contemplated randomly putting it back in their yard a dozen years later to make it right.
My buddy who helped has since moved to another part of the country. Every 8 months or so I get a text saying “just told the story again - never gets old” .
The_Nicest_Misanthrope 7 months ago
You couldn't have stuffed an envelope of cash through their letter box or something? Real d**k move
#17
When I was in 5th grade, I thought it'd be cool to light a single match and casually walk away.
Except instead of a small dramatic flame, I accidentally roasted the entire huge front yard of a massive Soviet apartment block.
When I came back the next day, every blade of grass was crispy black, with the unexpected bonus of a thoroughly barbecued car sitting right in the middle.
#18
Many years ago I had to provide a urine sample at the doctors. The nurse led me into the nurses desk area and told me to wait there, so I put my wee sample on the little work station whilst I found something in my bag.
I knocked that thing over and it spilled everywhere. All over paperwork, the pen pot, files, the lot. P**s everywhere. I'm there trying to mop it up and a guy in a suit runs past me with a sample cup and narrowly misses bashing into me.
The nurse comes out maybe 30 seconds later and looks pissed off when she sees the mess. I blamed it on the guy that came out almost running into me.
However, some of the stories told in this collection are truly nothing but amusing - and although people are sincerely ashamed of how they behaved in the described situation, sometimes it's difficult to hold back a smile. Such a wide range of tales is another confirmation that our life is an incredibly complex and multifaceted thing. And that makes it even more exciting to live it...
So now, please feel free to scroll this list to the end, and maybe add some of your own stories in the comments below the post - in case you also have something related to say here.
#19
We had s*x and fell asleep immediately after. I got up in the middle of the night, and saw a brown puddle in the sheets. Right after that I got dressed, left silently, and I haven’t contacted the guy since.
#20
Telling my friend I was gay and had feelings for him. He’s still nice to me, but it’s different.
#21
I s**t my pants on the playground in 3rd grade because the substitute teacher wouldn’t let me back inside.
When we finally went back inside I made a beeline to the toilet, trashed my underwear and desperately tried to clean out my shorts, to no avail. They were black so they didn’t show the obvious poop stains.
We had to line up on the second square from the wall going back into class and the person behind me loudly stated that someone “smelled like c**p”. I “jokingly”blamed the class pariah and everyone ran with it. He got made fun of the rest of the year but it was actually me
My bad Robert.
Lee Gilliland 7 months ago
No, the teacher's bad and she should have lost her license. Torturing kids with bathroom games is unforgivable and your parents should have sued the teacher, the school, and the school board. WHAT AN A*SHOLE.
#22
I was overbearing with someone who could've potentially been the love of my life. I've never been like that ever. But essentially it was a complex result of me not respecting some of my own boundaries that I usually would, and going too fast after a relatively recent break up.
I should have told her how I felt, but also that I wasn't quite ready early on. All of this could have been avoided.
Motivated sloth 7 months ago
Rebound romance can really mess you up. I still cringe about an ex I dated after a breakup. I cannot believe I tried to have a serious relationship with that loser.
#23
I was driving a short bus to take some kids on a field trip. I’m a teacher, not a bus driver, but generally a very good driver and no idea what I was thinking. And to be fair, it was a newer bus and was bigger than the older ones. But before I picked up the kids, pulled into the parking lot, thought I could get through, and when I realized it was a tighter squeeze than I thought, instead of backing out and going the long way around, I decided to try anyway. I scraped against someone’s car. This was at my school, a very small school with like 25 staff. The front of the school is all huge windows, and the office staff face them all day. Somehow no one saw what happened. I backed out, went on with my day and never said a thing, and never heard anyone mention damage to their car.
Trisec Tebeakesse 6 months ago
Not noted if the driver had a CDL and School Bus endorsement or not. If you didn't - well, you'd be in a world of hurt if you got caught.
#24
Back in the nineties I traded my foiled zapdos for a foiled blastoise I was young and naive and unaware, the moment trade was done the kid whipped out his card binder flipped through the entire thing and there was one empty spot left out of original 151 pokemon and slipped my card into the only empty spot. He completed the collection. Everyone erupted with applause and congratulated him with me standing there in disbelief he didn't even mention Jack s**t to me about that. I got hustled hard. I will regret this until the day I die.
#25
Clogged the toilet with toilet paper at my new job at a school two weeks in. Left the mess there like nothing happened cause I didn't know what to do.
Later, a coworker was complaining to me about a little girl who'd clogged the toilet and kept denying it and lying to get out of trouble when she was told off.
The little girl wasn't lying. It wasn't her. I did it.
I felt sorry, but didn't bother correcting my coworker.
What do you think ?
char 7 months ago
if they were planning to keep these secrets until they died, why'd they share them publicly on the internet, huh????
LakotaWolf (she/her) 7 months ago
Probably because they're using random Reddit usernames/throwaway accounts that no one will actually connect to their real-life identities, so they can anonymously get stuff off their chest and confess things they've done XD It can be cathartic for some people.
Load More Replies... char 7 months ago
if they were planning to keep these secrets until they died, why'd they share them publicly on the internet, huh????
LakotaWolf (she/her) 7 months ago
Probably because they're using random Reddit usernames/throwaway accounts that no one will actually connect to their real-life identities, so they can anonymously get stuff off their chest and confess things they've done XD It can be cathartic for some people.
Load More Replies...
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