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“Needless To Say, He Didn’t Get The Job”: 30 Wild Job Interview Stories Of People Aiming High
Job interviews can be tiring and stressful, with some going more smoothly than others. And it can be this way for both sides, the interviewer and the interviewee.
Today, we’re focusing on people who were responsible for carrying out job interviews; and some rather bizarre ones, I might add. One netizen got curious about the worst interviews HR representatives and managers have ever had to sit through, so they started a thread about it on the ‘Ask Reddit’ subreddit. Quite a few redditors shared stories, ranging from surprising to hilarious, so if you’re curious to read what they entailed, scroll down to find their accounts on the list below.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Years ago I had to interview somebody for a frontdesk position at our vacation rental company that was the most brutally honest person I've ever met in my entire life. There are just some things you try to avoid discussing during a job interview, if you can avoid it, but I almost wanted her because she was so honest (and she was actually very nice).
We had standard questions we ask in every interview. One of them is "If there's one thing you could improve upon, what is it?" Her answer? "Well, I'm not the most punctual person in the world, and I'm frequently late for my job."
*Okaaaaay*...How about driving record? "I've gotten a couple speeding tickets, and I currently don't have insurance on my car."
*It slowly gets worse*... Do you have any felony convictions in the last 10 years that haven't been expunged by a court of law, blah blah (and we've never had anybody actually answer "Yes" to this)? "I have a felony possession of a stolen weapon on my record, but only because I was the lease holder on the apartment that the gun was found in, and it was my old roommate's gun."
So we gave her an application to fill out, and she gets to the part on the form where it asks if they'll consent to d**g tests at random intervals, etc... . She asks how often they would be, and we said that she'd probably get one in her first 90 days, and then randomly thereafter. "Sorry for wasting your time, but I wouldn't be able to pass," and she sets down the application, says a polite goodbye and leaves our office.
I have to say, that was the most entertaining interview I've ever sat in on.
detective miller's hat 8 months ago
When I was interviewing for my current job (17 years ago now), I asked my now-boss if there would be d**g tests. He just started laughing like I had said the funniest thing he's ever heard and eventually says "no, absolutely not. That would be very hypocritical of me."
Boop the Snoot. Pound the Paw. 8 months ago
This was probably 35 years ago. I was in HS looking for a job at a restaurant as a hostess. Got the job and they wanted me to take a whiz quiz before I sgtarted. I dipped out. I didn't use d***s, but I felt that taking a leak in a cup for a hostess job was just degrading,
Richienotsorich 8 months ago
Why would they be interviewing her before giving her an application form?!
Donna Peluda 8 months ago
Unless you work in specific jobs, d**g testing is anticonstitucional on most european countries. Even police don't get d**g tested.
Michael Largey 8 months ago (edited)
"D**g tests? I didn't see those in the job description. But I'd be willing to pitch in and help, especially if it turns out to be good stuff."
RELATED:
#2
I once interviewed a woman who kept flirting with me, touching me, telling me how she was willing to do *anything* for this job, wink wink, etc. She was sort of attractive, but I sure as hell wasn't interested. Then came the clincher:
Me: "What made you leave your previous position?"
Her: "My boss fired me because I gave him herpes.".
Crystalwitch60 8 months ago
😱😂😂well least she was honest I spose but dear god u can’t fix stupid can u 😂
Bob Connely 8 months ago
Herpes - while it's nothing to clap about, it IS the gift that keeps on giving...
#3
"I see here on your resume you have a masters degree, what was your thesis on?" said I.
"Uh, huh huh, thesis?" said he staring blankly at me.
"You know the paper you had to write to graduate." I replied.
"Oh, ah, it was on the keyboards. They're important for computers." He said.
"So what exactly did you research about the keyboards?" I replied realizing I had a faker on my hands, but unable to resist how far the farce would go.
"I, ah, got my friends to type and I watched them, then I could tell how to improve, ah, efficiency and ah quality." he answered.
"So what statistical method did you use to demonstrate the improvements in efficiency and quality." I asked.
"I ah, recorded some numbers and made sure that they typed different then ah, the numbers got better." he replied.
"So just how did the numbers get better?" I continued.
"Ah, the numbers got better quality after I researched. My thesis went well, I could type faster after that." he replied.
"Name some data structures you studied in school getting your masters in C.S." I asked.
"Ah, masters in C.S.? Oh, yeah, masters in C.S., we studied data and it was structured in orderly ways." he replied.
"So name an order." I asked.
"Alphabetical." he replied.
"Very good." I replied.
I looked at my watch, the fun was over and I wanted coffee. I announced the interview was over and ushered him out with all required pleasantries. I think he would have went all day .
superfluous 8 months ago
I can believe the degree, but record LPM? He kept ahhing and huhing. Would've been faster (and more efficient) to cut those out.
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Big Chungus 8 months ago
To be fair, not all master programs require a thesis, that being said, I don't think this guy knows what is even happening
Tom Brincefield 8 months ago
True, but if you're in one of those programs, you would answer, "My particular course of study didn't include a thesis, instead we used this structure to better focus on these parts of the subject." not "What's a thesis?"
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John Dilligaf 8 months ago
TBF - not every masters degree program in every university requires a thesis
Bob Connely 8 months ago
"...he would have "went" all day..."? Apparently you weren't interviewing someone for a job that required the proper use of language/grammar...
#4
Heard this from a friend:
Interviewer: So, what do you think are your strengths?
Girl: My strengths are... my mother and father.
Interviewer: How about your weaknesses?
Girl: Uhm, honestly...
Girl: ... chocolates.
Ms.GB 8 months ago
As someone who used to interview I would find that answer charming.
Load More Replies... Sharkfin6 8 months ago
That's kinda cute actually. I once met a guy like that, he's gonna be my husband in 61 days.
#5
Interviewing a woman. I asked her what her weakness was. and her reply was .. UMMM Shoes??
she was hired by the way.
SheamusFanFrom1987 8 months ago
Personally IMO, I'm not a shoe Man-da but I can and do occasionally complement someone when I see they have a pair of good sneakers or heels (don't know much about the latter but some designs just catch the eye)...
Hobby Hopper 8 months ago
To each their own, but I really don't understand the shoe thing at all. I will literally never look at someone's shoes. Just give me a practical comfortable pair, and then I won't think about it again until they need to be replaced.
Bewarethere@gmail.com 7 months ago
Maybe find another job cuz they don't seem to listen to you
#6
Another horror story. I co-founded a freight company with a friend in another country, we were basically shipping goods back and forth, and through a couple of other countries using export duty arbitrage. We needed a driver who could travel from Le Havre in France to Piraeus in Greece, drop off some stuff and head back. After interviewing several people we have this Albanian guy come in for an interview. He tells us about his experience hauling freight but something's not quite right (for example, when we asked about routes he kept avoiding Germany and wanted to go up through Romania, whereas most of the other people I interviewed opted for better roads as they were given time bonuses), so my business partner pulls a favour with the French police and it turns out this guy was part of a smuggling gang, where they'd use legitimate vehicles to smuggle immigrants and track women. We were an ideal target because depending on his route he could pass through up to 6 (although with our timescales probably 4) pick up and drop off points.
Needless to say, he didn't get the job.
detective miller's hat 8 months ago
I used to hear stories like this from my cousin (British Army), except the freight companies were all in on it and they were moving stolen art and artifacts from Iraq and Iran.
Nikki138 8 months ago
So, by your logic my very nice ex coworkers are garbage? Wow......look at you
Load More Replies... #7
After a nice hour long interview with one of the best candidates, he asked if he could speak with us for a moment about the lord. This guy wanted to recruit us to be JW.
Gwyn 8 months ago
I bet he became not the best candidate real fast after that. No one wants to deal with constant conversion attempts from a coworker.
Seadog 8 months ago
Bank I worked for hired this college kid (part of some deal where the state pays part of his wages) who promptly began condemning the rest of us just because we listened to rock music. Acted all high and mighty. One of my guys comes in after about a week of this and said he'd told his girl friend about the guy and when he told her his name the fireworks went off. Turns out this Holier than thou kid was one of the biggest pot heads in school and got fired from Winn Dixie (grocery store) for scavenging (that's an employee who eats items from the shelf without paying for it).
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FABULOUS1 8 months ago
Grew up as a JW with many family members also, I have never heard anyone refer to him as the Lord, they always call him by his name. And no I am not a current JW
Michael Largey 8 months ago
Missionaries sometimes fing it helpful to speak in the native tongue.
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Cerridwn d'Wyse 8 months ago
Back when I was only a manager not a director, I was involved in the dismissal to use a polite word of somebody who kept trying to do the religious conversion thing. The actual director was quite a religious person but she felt it didn't have any place at work which is true and the other person who we fired didn't like that one of our staff wasn't Christian and kept trying to proselytize sort of not exactly but it was enough to get the other person fired because the non-Christian staff person was in my office in tears
Celtic Pirate Queen 8 months ago
I interviewed a woman who repeatedly mention that she was JW. When she didn't get the job, she tried to sue us for "religious bias". The guy from Dept. of L&I asked me a few questions about why she wasn't hired. I said in addition to not having any experience and lousy typing skills, she sat here picking her nose through the interview. He laughed and left. Claim closed.
Billo66 8 months ago
what "Lord"? I thought they didnt do Christmas because they don't believe in him?
Hoi-Polloi 8 months ago
Those cats have some ... unusual theology. They don't celebrate birthdays because the few times a birthday was mentioned in the Bible something bad happened soon after.
Load More Replies... #8
Oh god, I have a million. Most recent was a guy who filled out his application via texts from his mother. He would take a picture of the question on the app and she would text him back the answer. He took an hour to fill out a two page basic application.
Hoi-Polloi 8 months ago
To be fair, his mother probably remembers that day *way* more clearly than the lad.
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#9
Probably won't be seen, but have to share.
Job Requirements: Specific technical acumen; client-facing skills
Interviewer: Me
10:00 AM - Busy day, so I skip meeting to review resume. Looks fine except for NSFW email address.
11:00 AM - Guy doesn't answer phone. Voicemail message is recorded by a girlfriend or relative and says something about John and his cat not being home. I start to get concerned but leave friendly message anyway. "Call me back directly if you get this in the next few minutes, otherwise just call the main office and reschedule for another time."
2:00 PM - Phone rings. I don't recognize the number and say "hello it's Nick".
"Uhh, yeah, I was, umm, sleeping. I'm on medications for my disorder and..."
Me: "Wooah there. Is this John? Umm, any medical conditions aren't my business, but I do have a few minutes to talk now if you'd like" (anticipating it will be short).
Him: "Yeah it's just for voices but it makes me sleepy and I had my lights off and, yeah, umm, so..."
Me: "Anyway, I was told you're interested in this technical position. Can you talk a little about your last position on your resume and your role in the project?"
Him: "Well I really didn't work in that, I just watched someone do it"
Me: "Umm, so could you tell me what technology or framework was used?"
Him: "I think it was.. uhhh"
* I put my head down as he speed-rambles for another minute, waiting for a break to end the call *
Him: "...so now you've seen me at my worst, I guess. Do you think I'll get the job?"
Me: (thinking *wtf did he just say?*) "Uhh. Well we're looking for someone experienced in X technologies, and it doesn't really sound like you've worked in it. I'd hate to waste both of our time here so I'd just like to thank you for calling back and wish you luck in future searches."
Him: (screaming) "NOOOO! That's not true! I'm really great in other stuff? What can I tell you to get the job?!"
Me: "Sorry, but I'll have to let you go now. I'll pass along my review notes and if we find a good fit for your skill set, we'll give you a call back."
Him: "Oh! Good. How long will that take?"
*le click*.
Marie BellaDonna 8 months ago
Sounds like a man-child who was coddled as a kid, and never told the word "No." Now he can't handle rejection, and can't do anything for himself. (Evidenced by the fact he didn't get up for the interview, and further by the fact that his mother/wife/gf/whoever recorded his voicemail message.)
#10
We asked a lady who had come to interview for a position as a teacher's assistant what her experience was. She replied "well I used to be a child, so I do know about them".
#11
One of my favorite moments came when I was interviewing someone for whom English was not their native language, and I think something got lost a bit in the translation.
I asked a required question of the job: "Are you able to lift 30 pounds unassisted?"
His reply: "Yes...I am a man."
It was difficult to keep a straight face after that one.
Nikki138 8 months ago
Upvotes? Really? For a comment on language barriers
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Hoi-Polloi 8 months ago
They don't ask that question if it isn't relevant. I want to know who is struggling with the 30-pound weight?
#12
During an interview we asked the candidate for an example of when they had to do something which was out of their comfort zone. She replied with "On a night out last year I drank way too many shots and had to have my stomach pumped. That was really uncomfortable.".
Seadog 8 months ago
I've tapped alcohol poisoning on the shoulder (so to speak) and I've had CO poisoning. The results? I now don't drink much and when I do it's ONE or I split one with the wife. And CO sets me off (stabbing headache) in the blink of an eye. No need for a detector.
Load More Replies... SheamusFanFrom1987 8 months ago (edited)
Yup, that's definitely out of the comfort zone alright. Way, way, way out in so many ways...
#13
I a co-worker were interviewing applicants and my co-worker asked what kind of animal they'd like to be. The applicant said a cat, because they're sneaky and can get away with stuff.
Then there was the guy who wrote his application letter in purple crayon.
Jordan Croff 8 months ago
Why are you asking people what kind of animal they would want to be in a job interview???
Ashtophet’sRevenge 8 months ago
I used to dread asking these kinds of questions, but they were frequently a good indicator of a person’s personality.
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Christos Arvanitis 8 months ago (edited)
As an adult with lots of sales experience, I was interviewing for a sales job in an industry that I knew well and enjoyed. In the first interview, a very young interviewer asked me what kind of animal I would be. For sales positions, they are usually looking for some sort of "king of the jungle" response. I hated being asked that question and so I told them my favorite animal- a platypus. That completely befuddled her. For the record it's because the the platypus is a survivor that has a little bit of everything and defies categorization... and can sting you if you really p i s s one off. I told them I wasn't interested....
ॐBoyGanesh 8 months ago
And some circles consider them fish. Well, at least not fleshy meaty beings.
Load More Replies... Tom Brincefield 8 months ago
I used to know someone who was an editor for a publisher. They accepted unsolicited manuscripts at that time, and everyone had to help go through the slush pile, looking for things they could publish. People would do all kinds of things to make their manuscript stand out, and it drove the readers crazy, because it invariably made it hard to read. Weird colors for the ink and the paper, strange fonts, oversize pages, all kinds of things. She told us about a manuscript that came in, gold ink on purple paper. The worst part was, it was a great story and they wanted to buy it.
Tim Douglass 8 months ago
Friend worked as a "reader" for a publishing house for a while. Went from loving literature and reading to being unable to pick up a book without twitching. She said it was mind-numbing how bad most of the submissions were - and these all came in via agents! I can't imagine how horrible it would be without that filter.
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#14
I used to be a receptionist for someone who did short pre-screening interviews for people applying for entry-level jobs. They were supposed to be like 5 minutes and she would just ask them questions about their experience after they finished filling out the application.
There are some really dumb people who came in for these but one guy in particular stands out for pure cluelessness. She asked him the 6 or 7 questions, and then she tried wrapping it up and he just didn't understand that the interview was over. English was his first language and she was trying to be polite saying "I have no more questions" and "was there anything you wanted to ask me?" but he would not leave.
He just sat there in the chair looking dumb. She even left her office for and came to talke to me for a bit and he just sat there staring into space. Even after she was a bit more direct he wouldn't leave, eventually she just took his arm and said "okay you have to go now" and led him out. It was ridiculous.
He didn't get a second interview.
Ace 8 months ago (edited)
Sounds like an interviewer problem, not the interviewee. Why didn't she just tell him, "right, we're done here, we'll be in touch"? Once he'd failed to get the message from her "subtle" hints as quoted it would surely be obvious and easy to just use less subtle language?
Paulina 8 months ago
I agree. Why didn't they just say the interview is over? There's literally no benefit in beating around the bush 🤦♀️
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#15
I had a guy show up in a t-shirt and jeans to a developer interview. He didn't look as if he had showered, wasn't nervous at all, knew barely any coding, and said he couldn't start for a month because he and his band were going on tour. We didn't hire him.
Ace 8 months ago (edited)
T shirt and jeans is fairly standard dress for developer, no? I might have made an effort for the interview though. The rest is not so forgivable.
Tardis42 8 months ago
Yes, t-shirt and jeans is standard dress for an actual developer, i.e. one who has a job as a developer. If you WANT a job as a developer, unless you're told otherwise, you should dress up for an interview. Maybe don't go full suit, but a button down shirt and slacks at least.
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Pyla 8 months ago
We were hiring a student employee for a part time position doing some involved spreadsheet stuff. Small office. Two showed up unbathed. Like stank up the conference room. One girl wore a dress that was uncomfortably sheer. Final kid came in guns a-blazing about his political affiliations and volunteerism in that arena (not offensive to me, but my manager was less than impressed). We didn't get anyone in that batch.
Celtic Pirate Queen 8 months ago
Had a guy come in the the admin assistant position. Hair was greasy and he was wearing sweatpants and slippers. For a front desk position. Some people.
#16
In high school, one of my girlfriends went in for a job at Ralphs, when asked why she wanted to work there, she responded, "I like food". She was hired and came to be known as food girl.
John Dilligaf 8 months ago
why does any HS kid go in for a job? Either for extra spending money or because their parents made them. That's pretty much the only two reasons.
superfluous 8 months ago
From Wikipedia: Ralphs is an American supermarket chain in Southern California. The largest subsidiary of Cincinnati-based Kroger, it is the oldest such chain west of the Mississippi River. Kroger also operates stores under the Food 4 Less and Foods Co. names in California.
Load More Replies... #17
I was a manager of a video rental chain store in a city that is built around a college. We hired a majority of college students whose parents wouldn't support their drinking and d**g habits, but some people were single parents living in the outlying area.
One girl told me in the interview that she was a recovering alcoholic and needed the job for probation. She was drunk at the interview.
A huge burly guy came in and during the interview told me that he needed the money for a new engine for his truck. After he had it, he was going to quit.
Another kid admitted that he was fired from his last job for stealing movies. It wasn't on his application.
The best was a college student that came in and was a well known d**g dealer. He told me that he needed the paycheck to cover all of the stuff he was buying with his d**g money. I ended up hiring him... because of the slim pickings in the area, and his references at other jobs (although only 3 month spurts) were great. He ended up being a great worker and the District Manager wondered why when she offered him the job as my Assistant Manager, he kept turning it down. And he only wanted to work 3 days a week. When I left, he was still there and from what I hear, he used that experience as a Shift Lead (he did accept that eventually), his business degree and his experience as a "entrepreneur" to land a job in some other city in finance.
Marnie 8 months ago
I'm sure it was meant tongue in cheek (if that's the right expression). He worded it to be amusing.
Load More Replies... #18
One time, a woman showed up for an interview wearing the most ridiculous outfit I've ever seen. Her sandles were so high I don't know how she was able to walk, and her fingernails and toenails were that waaaaay-too long and creepy (I don't mean those regular fake nails, but the 2+ inch long ones) type with the little dangly charms on the tips. Her makeup was actually not that bad, just a little heavy for daytime wear. Her skirt was so short and tight that I was able to notice that she wasn't wearing underwear and I remember to this day that she was wearing a red bra with little white hearts on it. The interview was a formality and a waste of time. It was pretty obvious from the moment she walked through the front door that she wasn't family-restaurant material.
Tom Brincefield 8 months ago
Which is why he shouldn't have been able to see the white hearts. Whether it was seen through her blouse or actually visible in the open, it was not suitable for the job or the interview.
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Svenne O'Lotta 8 months ago
Kind of insane to be judging others when you can't even spell the word "sandals"
#19
Skills mentioned on the CV matched my hiring requirements exactly. Jackpot! So I invited the guy to interview.
At the interview, when asked to demonstrate these skills - ie. write a snippet of code - and the guy starts saying how he didn't really use those skills in his old job but some of his colleagues did and then pushes a bound thick mass of printed source code across the desk to me. Turns out this is a printed copy of his old company's application source code.
I was about to burst out laughing when the smoke alarm went off and the building was evacuated. I basically told him we'd call him another time if we wanted to talk to him again and he went home. Saved by the bell, literally.
#20
Coworker of mine was interviewing a junior developer for a job writing web performance testing code. To gauge the dude's interest in the field, my coworker asked what the guy liked most about the internet. The guy said "p**n." Then he realized what he had said, panicked, and asked my coworker not to tell anyone he had said that.
I mean, it's the right answer, but not in that context. He didn't get the job.
Brian Herold 8 months ago
🎵 "Why you think the 'Net was born? P0rn, p0rn, p0rn! 🎶
Load More Replies... #21
I'm not an HR person, but the other day someone came in to my department for an interview wearing a zoot suit. I didn't even know those were still available to buy.
trixiefly11 8 months ago
Maybe he is trying to bring them back. More ridiculous fashions have made a comeback. Why not.
Tom Brincefield 8 months ago (edited)
Looks like a Mask costume. Bet he has a green face. Sssmokin'!
#22
One place I worked we had a guy come in for a deep technical reverse engineering job. The initial smalltalk went ok, so we started asking questions about debugging and it became pretty clear he knew nothing but kept making stuff up anyway. We kept saying to him if he didn't know the answer it was fine, just say so and he kept making stuff up. In the end I was asking him questions like how can you avoid remotely exploitable memory allocation bugs when using Ethernet over UDP, and he kept answering. My favourite bit was when he told us how he'd get root access on Windows Servers by exploiting Redhat Apache packages.
Ace 8 months ago
I know just enough to recognise that some of the questions were deliberately absurd, i.e. impossible scenarios, in order to verify how little he really knew.
TiNaBoNiNa 8 months ago
I know next to nothing and can tell that's impossible.
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Leg less In Minneapolis 8 months ago
I was the lead developer in our group, my favorite interviews were coders who did not know s**t, the fairy tales were funny.
Donna Peluda 8 months ago
I had the opposite. During an interview I was given a circuit schematic. They asked me to identify components. Simple stuff, resistors op amps etc. The interviewer had no idea what he was talking about. Got the job and still there 25 years later.
KatSaidWhat 8 months ago
Blagged my way into a helpdesk job because someone had taught me regedit (yes, late 90s) - they knew I was probably unsuitable, especially since I had a gothic-esque dress with very cropped hair (UK bank, horse logo) but thought it would be entertaining anyway. what they didn't expect was how quickly I can pick up on IT and when I left at the end of the year to return to Saffa, was given an "if you return to London, call us". :-) As an aside, that director of IT was later found to have b*********y on his computers 🤯
#23
I have a standard question: "If you could choose a superpower, what would it be?" The best answer ever was "the ability to speak to squirrels." The worst: "Ummmm... the Soviet Union?".
Michael Largey 8 months ago (edited)
"If I had a superpower, do you think I'd be applying for this job?"
Marnie 8 months ago
This is about bad interviewers, not interviewees. This is a really dumb, useless question to ask in an interview.
dollh h 8 months ago
Right up there with "what kind of tree would you be". Worst interview question ever.
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KatSaidWhat 8 months ago
Time travel - just the one time to get the next super jackpot lottery numbers.
#24
Me: What's one of your weaknesses?
Him: Well. Sometimes after lunch, I can get a little gassy.
Karen Bryan 8 months ago
Worked years ago with a guy who heated his kimchi in the microwave. Phewww!
Load More Replies... #25
I used to work for a salon over by IVC and I hired this college girl as a receptionist. Things went well for about three months when one day she never showed up. Turns out the only reason she applied was because she thought I was cute and when I didn't pick up on her advances she quit. I really am oblivious.
Celtic Pirate Queen 8 months ago
My husband worked with a woman, who in his words, dressed like a complete s**t. Large bust and no bra, Dallas high teased hair, drag queen makeup, etc. Everyone had been warned that she was only there long enough to file a sexual harassment suit, so everyone ignored her & the guys avoided her like the plague. After about six months she gave up and quit.
Rick H 7 months ago
Worked selling cars to pay for school. New hire, an attractive female. End of her first week she made up a story about how her boyfriend just broke up with her over the phone and she was planning on him giving her a ride home from work, could I do her a favor and drive her home. While thing sounded scripted and I said no. The closer took her up on the offer. She didn't show up the next day and she sued for sexual harassment because of allegations about what happened on that car ride. 10/10 chance she had planned it from the start.
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PandaGoPanda 8 months ago
I call my schoolfriends "girls" and they're approaching 60 now. Seems perfectly reasonable for a college student , from context the writer is not writing in a formal style.
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#26
Me: tell me about a time you have had to resolve a conflict
Interviewee: A guy tried to start a fight with me last friday, so I knocked his teeth out.
#27
I work at an investment firm where we train new financial advisors coming in from a different industry.
In the first interview I asked "Tell me what you're doing now?" and he launched into a 10 minute tirade (I had to stop him) about how his evil boss at taco bell framed him for giving nacho's to his friend.
Didn't make the second interview.
#28
A guy once told me (in earnest) that his last 5 managers were a*s holes.
trixiefly11 8 months ago
I mean, it is possible that with bad luck, his last 5 managers were A-Holes.
#29
While in college I worked at a hotel as a front desk manager. I had that job for 2 days when they told me to hire more people. I said, sure, no problem, post it. I'd never done a management gig before. They said they'd post the job and would screen resumes.
I get the stack and look through. A few good candidates and a guy who had a PhD in psych. Hrmm, odd that a guy with a PhD would want to make 7.25 and drive 70 miles each way to do so. I put that one on the bottom of the stack. Interviewed all of the others, the office manager called me in and said "you need to interview this guy". I told her that I wasn't getting why he'd apply with us for that little money and the drive. "Doesn't matter, he's capable". I call, he said he'd be there that night.
Guy arrives dressed ok. Older but very anxious looking. I go through the interview questions and explain the job. He asks me when he can start. I tell him that I need to check references. He gets agitated and I tell him that we have to check references. I ask him if it's ok if I call his. "No". Hrmm. I thank him for his time and leave. He sits in the lobby a while then starts to bother the girl at the front desk before leaving. I note this on his app and file it away.
A week later he calls and is upset he didn't hear from us. GM tells him why. He calls the corporate office and complains then the ESC and says we didn't hire him because he's old. The lawyers get involved, nothing more.
6 years later (and a different career later) I start an IT gig with a state agency. I'm in my office one day when I hear a knock on the door. It's that guy....he works there as a psych. He gives me an odd look, asks if we've met. I act like we haven't. He leaves after pestering me with home PC questions. A few years later he was sent to a state mental home after he went nuts in the office.
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2nd place - Guy who was fired for beating up a coworker (was applying to be an IT director at another job I had). Said he'd never do it again. When asked about his references he said don't check and wouldn't allow us to run a background check. Turns out he had been fired and done jail time for that and 2 other battery charges.
3rd - CCIE who applied and handed in a resume written in pencil on yellow legal paper. No application (as requested). The handwriting was a mix of small and cap letters. I should have framed it.
Charles McChristy 8 months ago
I had someone walk into my office and hand me a resume. When I told him of the procedure (contacting HR, digital cover letter, resume and must complete an application) and so on. He just went "Pfft, just make sure this gets to the right person!". So I did. I made sure our custodial staff filed it in the proper container at the end of the day.
#30
Are you flexible? Can you fill in for others? Response: I do a lot of yoga...
Michael Largey 8 months ago
Since the questions already tell me I don't want to work there, it's fine if I answer like that.
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If you're interested in stepping into adulthood with some handy tips, explore this useful life advice. It might just give you an edge not only in interviews but in everyday challenges as well.
#31
I was interviewing a software engineer. The interview went ok, nothing wrong but the guy just wasnt great. He called multiple times over the next two weeks until we made our decision, which was someone other than him. Upon learning this he got pissed and sent us a bill for his time during the interview.
superfluous 8 months ago
Hmm. Maybe he's got something? The interviewer is getting paid. The company wants a position filled? They want to screen the heck out of who they interview? Put some earnest money up!
Otto Katz 8 months ago
My husband went back to get his teaching cert. after years in industry, he went on hundreds of interviews, it took him 5 years to get a full-time tenure track position. Almost every interview was useless, they already knew who they were hiring, but union rules stated they needed to interview other people to make it appear fair. He was interviewing not knowing he had 0 (zero) chance of getting the job. Evil.
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#32
Maybe not the worst of alltime, but it made me laugh...
Was interviewing an applicant for a PM position at my company, and halfway through one of the interviewers asked the standard "So, where do you think you'll be in 5 years?" question...
... long pause ....
"Well... I'd still like to be employed..."
Nothing like a little ambition... reach for the stars - you can do it!
Sally Moen 8 months ago
Of all the stupid interview questions, this one I hate the most. Not everybody has that driving force to move up, there's this seemingly little-known thing called survival. What that entails is working enough hours and making enough pay to be able to pay rent and bills and buy groceries. With so many jobs paying at minimum wage or just over, keeping your eye on survival is more important than thinking of a 5-year plan to conquer the world or workplace
TiNaBoNiNa 8 months ago
I always got this question at dead-end minimum wage jobs.
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Brian Droste 8 months ago
I never like this type of question. I don't have to worry about it anymore. I am retired
#33
"Misdemeanor - carring samuri sword"
Yes, he spelled 'misdemeanor' correctly but s**t the bed on "carrying" and "samurai.".
#34
A friend gave interviews for a programming job.
He told me he asked every applicant, "what is one of your pet projects?"
One of them answered, beaming with confidence: "well, I'm actually working on an infinite compression algorithm".
My friend them wrote a string of random bits on a piece of paper and told him "well then, please compress this set of data for me"
The guy actually worked at it for some time...
#35
I work for an advertising agency and a couple of months back a resumé made the rounds here because of sheer hilarity.
The guy was trying to be a copywriter. His current job was working for a local supermarket restocking shelves. He was 32 with no experience or training in advertising/writing. His portfolio consisted of poorly made, cliché outdoor ads and tv scripts where he always made sure to specify that the lead character would be wearing a light blue shirt.
The worse part is that he somehow knew every Creative Director in town and sent his portfolio to every single one of them, by mail. He would even show up for all the Portfolio Nights (where people starting out have a chance to show what they got to all the major CDs) and awards shows. He's a sort of legend really. He will never make it, but I admired his persistence.
#36
Last year, I went to a job fair at a local college to tell people about the internship at my office. A young lady stops at my table, asks what kind of jobs I have available, and hands me her resume. I look down to skim her resume. When I look back up, she has her thumb in her mouth.
I asked her about her major, her previous jobs, her availability, and she answered all my questions while she sucked her thumb. Sad thing is, other than that, she was probably the most qualified person I saw all day.
#37
I already posted once but I'll post again. We had a guy come in to apply for a developer position; one of the things he said he could bring to the table was that he could get his hands on a really nice car if we needed for him to go out and sell. He reminded me of Phillip Seymour Hoffman (which was a plus except he was a bad version) and when we asked how much he would need for an hourly rate he said $12/hr. (this was for a PHP developer position with Joomla! which should be making somewhere around 30-75 / hr depending on how good this person is).
Marnie 8 months ago
Companies don't pay based on how good a person is, so that part of this post is ridiculous.
TiNaBoNiNa 8 months ago
Yes, they do. They will offer a pay range DOE - Depending On Experience.
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#38
I have a pile of resumes that I keep because they are absolutely hilarious. I can't believe someone would send something like that to a company and expect to get hired. I wish I could forward them to the unemployment agency and say "stop paying this guy, he's not trying"
I had one guy show up with a hat on, and big leather jacket with skulls, and jeans with patches of all the nba teams (I work in a pretty formal environment). He sat slumped in his chair and would barely answer any questions. The whole time he was acting like I was wasting his time interviewing him. I cut it short obviously. Last time I interview someone without a phone interview first because of a "recommendation".
#39
Me: "How is your relation to alcohol? Do you drink?"
Applicant: "Good! Yeah I drink, but not cause I think it tastes good, only to get drunk."
Guy didn't flinch. He was completely honest. I gave him the job.
#40
Not an interview, but an application...
At a print shop I had someone come in, poke at the photocopier confusedly, ask for help because she couldn't figure out that the BIG GREEN BUTTON THAT SAYS "START" starts the copying, stand back stare at the ceiling and do NOTHING while the staffer did the photocopying for her, and then come up to the desk and hand in a resume for a position that was basically all photocopying.
#41
I was a fairly inexperienced manager interviewing a very normal middle-aged guy for a blue collar position when this happened:
Me: I see there is a gap of several years here in your job experience. Can you tell me what that's about?
Him: Yes I was serving a 5-year prison sentence
Me: *sitting in awkward stunned silence trying figure out what to say next*
Him: I was convicted of **r**ing my daughter**
Me: *feeling a million times more awkward and wondering how the heck this guy got past HR*
Me: OkIthinkIamdonenow. LetmetakeyoubacktotheHRmanager.
I don't know if he felt we would find out anyway so why not just fess up or if he was kind of crazy.
Charles McChristy 8 months ago
If you are in the national s*x offender registery, which includes a lifetime of probation, you have to fess up.
Marnie 8 months ago
Well, I mean, he could be in trouble if he lied. He has to work or he will starve to death (not that I care if he starves to death). More likely, he has to live off of hand-outs in various ways if he can't get a job, so better for society if someone hires him. But I think people like this should get life sentences.
Sally Moen 8 months ago
Needs to 1)work on his interview skills and 2)apply for appropriate jobs, ones that would hire him in spite of his criminal record. In my area (greater Seattle area), the state employment agency has regular workshops in person and via zoom to help people who were incarcerated or have sketchy backgrounds. Of course the first thing an applicant needs to do is work on themselves, as far as therapy and/or restitution
#42
I called a guy to set up an interview. He was currently working at Starbucks. Immediately the first thing I notice is that he sounds like Garth from Wayne's World.
And I asked him:
"So what are your strengths."
And Garth replied:
"I'm good at computers and s**t."
No interview. No job.
#43
When interviewing people I start by saying that when they do not know the question, they should say so. Self knowledge is important to us. During an interview, testing basic programming knowledge, one guy would each time try to talk his way out of an answer and each time I had to say let me know if you do not know.
I stopped at question 5. "What is Object Oriented programming"? That was the first time I ever felt ashamed in someone else's place.
David Shaw 8 months ago
To be honest, I'm a programmer;I use object oriented programming all the time; I can explain when it's appropriate and when it isn't, what encapsulation is, how inheritance works and pretty much anything about the subject. But I'd struggle to answer the question 'what is it?'
#44
Happened over 10 years ago, I was in an interview with a smallish firm in the Boston area. The VP, creator of the product and founder of the company had an advanced from MIT. And he acted like he had an advanced degree from MIT. I don't know how his ego fit into the same room as he was in.
At the time, I had about 20 years of experience in the field, and they were looking for someone to head up the technical team to lead the east coast of the US for their product.
It was about a 3 hour drive to get to the interview, and after a preliminary breakfast meeting with the national manager I would be working for, I walked into his office, and he clearly hadn't read my resume. His first question...and mind you...I am 40 yo at the time.
"I see you picked a state school for your degree. Why did you go there?"
About 10 minutes and 3 questions later, he says he doesn't think I am appropriate for the job, and has another appointment to go to.
#45
Male applicant used the women's bathroom. TWICE.
#46
We were interviewing for a receptionist position. We decided that, given that our previous receptionist had been a hateful b***h and didn't like talking to people, couldn't smile, etc., that we wanted to select someone more outgoing and sociable. So we invented the following question:
"You're at a party where you don't really know anyone. What's your strategy for breaking the ice?"
One applicant's answer:
"Well, I guess my first step would be to find the open bar. Once I get a few adult beverages in me, I can talk to pretty much anybody."
(He didn't get the job.).
Jordan Croff 8 months ago
Well, you did say "at a party". I'm sure the strategy might be different in other situations.
White Sauce Hot Sauce 8 months ago
First of all, why am I at a party where I don't know anyone?
Steïcy Gya 8 months ago
I dont see anything wrong with that answer though. A party is a party, work is work. Im in a people oriented job and has to talk with people all the time. But in my personal life Im pretty much on my own and would not really engage with other people as easily as when I am at work. Im not introvert or shy, but even I need to gather some courage to introduce myself to new people.
#47
Not a manager/HR but I did some pre-screening of potential new hires for my company once. I ask a couple of technical questions that I except to be beyond the experience of the individual (its a common thing where I work) to see how they can deal with a question they don't know the answer to. Some people surprise you and know it, others try to work through it with you and ask questions back (This is excellent, because thats what I want in a coworker), other people get really quiet and red, and I had one guy who flat out refused to answer or attempt to answer.
Remember thats its not always about the answer, but how you handle yourself. A lot of people who interview you just want to find out if they would like to work with you.
#48
I worked at Gamestop for about 6 months as an Assistant Store Manager, it was a fairly new store and people kept asking for applications even thought we were fully staffed. One day a teenager walks into the store and asks for an application, the store manager and I asked him to take his time answering the application with good writing ( half the time we cant even read their names), the kid goes on a rampage saying "Who the hell you think you are telling what to do with this application" The store manager calmly said, im the Store Manager and I decide go gets hired, kid went back to his car and filled the application with even more worse c***py handwriting.
Papa 8 months ago
That's just one of the multiple problems in just that last sentence.
Load More Replies... Sally Moen 8 months ago (edited)
This is a generational problem that I believe should play less importance to employers. If you watch old movies, you will see people applying for jobs by handwriting letters of interest to employers. That would rarely happen today. If a person can articulate their job experience and has turned in a readable resume, if needed, they should be given a chance, even if they can't print legibly. Handwriting can be trained. Of course, this post describes somebody's bad attitude, which is very difficult to work with.
#49
I was once asked by a very attractive female if there was *anything* I (HR) could do to help her get the job. I'm pug fugly, so she must have been pretty desperate.
Michael Largey 8 months ago
Those folks in Human Resources are only human but can be very resourceful.
Load More Replies... #50
Well, i'm sure this was pretty bad for the interviewer. had eaten a taco right before, and spilt some beans on my white button down. then, in the interview, i farted loudly several times, all within two or three minutes of each other.
the smell was oppressive. i did not get the job.
#51
I interviewed an older guy once for a developer position. He had a pretty decent resume, but the whole thing was off when he told me/asked me before the interview, and I quote, "I've been doing this for a long time, and my eyes aren't quite what they used to be and these fluorescent lights start to bother me after a while. Do you mind if I wear my sunglasses?"
I sat through the entire interview trying not to laugh each time I looked up and saw my own face reflecting off this guy's sunglasses.
Ace 8 months ago
I fail to see what's bad about this. He explained and asked politely, you just ridiculed him.
Serena Myers 8 months ago
Fair enough, I worked somewhere where they had fluorescent lights and I was allowed to wear sunglasses.
Sally Moen 8 months ago
There is a valid reason why so many people turn off the overhead lights and use a desktop lamp for eye strain. This story hints at ageism
What do you think ?
Ron Man 8 months ago
Years ago a coworker and I were interviewing a newhire candidate. The candidate had a strong military background on their resume, and claimed to have been in a unique aid-type position during a 90s eastern european conflict. My coworker also had a strong military background and had been in a unique aid-type position during a 90s eastern european conflict. About halfway through the interview my coworker started grilling the candidate on specifics about their military experience during that time, and the unique position they were in. Highly specific information about names of others, protocols, etc. At the end of the questioning, my coworker said something to the effect of, "None of that is true. You're a complete liar. I feel confident in saying that because not only did you answer all the questions incorrectly, but that was actually my job during that time frame. The candidate's face was awesome when he was called out. He didn't get the job.
Marnie 8 months ago
Wouldn't this fall under "stolen valor"? He's trying to profit from lying about having been in the military.
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Chris H 8 months ago
I couldn't finish this article because I was asked to subscribe to premium to finish it. I think it might be time to move on from bored panda if they want me to subscribe and see ads in their content. No not going to happen.
Fabulous chocolate cookie 7 months ago
Not to forget the aggressive anti-adblock wall.
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Andrew Vince 8 months ago
They asked me if I had a Police record, I said no, but that I did have one of Sting's CDs.....
Donna Peluda 8 months ago
Interviewing for a slot machine arcade on girl came with her mum. Mum answered the questions, the girl sat there mute.
Ron Man 8 months ago
Years ago a coworker and I were interviewing a newhire candidate. The candidate had a strong military background on their resume, and claimed to have been in a unique aid-type position during a 90s eastern european conflict. My coworker also had a strong military background and had been in a unique aid-type position during a 90s eastern european conflict. About halfway through the interview my coworker started grilling the candidate on specifics about their military experience during that time, and the unique position they were in. Highly specific information about names of others, protocols, etc. At the end of the questioning, my coworker said something to the effect of, "None of that is true. You're a complete liar. I feel confident in saying that because not only did you answer all the questions incorrectly, but that was actually my job during that time frame. The candidate's face was awesome when he was called out. He didn't get the job.
Marnie 8 months ago
Wouldn't this fall under "stolen valor"? He's trying to profit from lying about having been in the military.
Load More Replies... Chris H 8 months ago
I couldn't finish this article because I was asked to subscribe to premium to finish it. I think it might be time to move on from bored panda if they want me to subscribe and see ads in their content. No not going to happen.
Fabulous chocolate cookie 7 months ago
Not to forget the aggressive anti-adblock wall.
Load More Replies... Andrew Vince 8 months ago
They asked me if I had a Police record, I said no, but that I did have one of Sting's CDs.....
Donna Peluda 8 months ago
Interviewing for a slot machine arcade on girl came with her mum. Mum answered the questions, the girl sat there mute.
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