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How do we know our love interest really likes us? I mean, how do we know for real. This simple, yet somewhat alarming thought may break into even the tightest relationships. Because there’s always ‘what if’ and ‘what now’...

So when Twitter user @Oloni wrote: “You ever think about the men who said they liked you before and suddenly realized they actually really hated you,” it struck a chord with many. Amassing 29.8K likes, the thread quickly became a safe space to talk about hard things where people shared the exact moment they realized their love did not quite love them.

So let’s get ready to dive into the sea of real-life stories on how crushes suddenly crash, in cases ranging from cheating to those that are much more sinister.

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    #3

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    Vuyiswa84572634 Report

    Nannychachi
    Community Member
    Premium
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Called my then-husband to take me to the hospital because I started bleeding at 3 months pregnant. His response? "Can't you call my dad to take you? I'm getting ready to go play softball." Divorced that trash and have been married to World's Best Husband for the last 18 years.

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    We are all worthy of love, but in reality, most of us have survived rejection in various shapes, forms, and levels of hurt at some point in our lives. Whether it’s your partner saying they don’t love you as much as they used to, or them acting like they couldn’t care less about you, or… Well, the ways to break your heart are endless. And while some withstand the initial shock and cold shower with their head up, others take days, if not months or even years, to heal and find love again.

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    No wonder scientists have shown now and again that love literally hurts. Known as “stress cardiomyopathy” to the medical community, it’s better known as “broken heart syndrome,” and medical professionals don’t object to the nickname. Neuroimaging studies have shown that brain regions involved in processing physical pain overlap considerably with the areas in charge of social anguish. The connection between the two was found to be so strong that bodily painkillers turned out to successfully relieve our emotional wounds.

    #4

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    Vanessa123uk Report

    Laura Lou
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This dude just sounds like a complete psycho!

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    #5

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    rissy2sway Report

    urszulat
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And there were no red flags beforehand?

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    #6

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    jackieaina Report

    Jo Johannsen
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Normal people don't use condiments? There's an entire industrial sector down the drain.

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    So in order to find out how to survive rejection and help a friend or relative who’s going through a heartbreak, we talked to Kate Mansfield, an award-winning dating coach, TV personality, writer and women’s rights activist.“ Rejection can have a profound or a mild effect, depending on the psychological state, the past trauma and the personality of the person,” Kate said and added that “at its worst, it can cause extreme feelings of worthlessness and even depression.”

    Therefore, it’s not something to be taken lightly. “It can cause the person to withdraw from relationships and to stay alone. Or, to feel not good enough and low self-esteem,” Kate explained and added that those with healthy self esteem and confidence are not affected as much “because they have a solid sense of self-worth already.”

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    #9

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    IvoryL3710 Report

    deanna woods
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My parents drove all the way back home after I got in a car accident. They in another city when it happened.

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    Since the pain of being rejected has direct ties with our self-esteem, Kate suggests first working on your self-esteem in order to “understand that it is nothing to do with you, it is usually not personal.”

    “Try to feel grateful, because the one thing worse than being rejected is to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn’t really love you.” The dating coach added that in such cases when rejection happens on a daily basis, it causes extreme loneliness.

    #10

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    AlaniWilliams11 Report

    D S
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Ouch!! This is so wrong on so many levels... what a selfish prick.

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    #11

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    aunty_drey Report

    denzoren
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm really sorry I laughed..it's something about the wording. I hope you ended it.

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    If someone close to you is going through a heartbreak, Kate suggests being supportive and spending time with them. In extreme cases when the problem persists, it’s best to turn to coaching and counselling for help. However, “Be aware that we can only help people so much, sometimes they need to help themselves,” she added.

    Most importantly, Kate concluded that “we are not rejected by others, we reject ourselves by staying in a relationship with someone who isn't really committed, or into us.”

    “This self-rejection is the worst part, so have boundaries and standards for yourself. Set your standards high, don't stay for the sake of it. Taking this action will increase your self-esteem and your attraction level too,” the dating coach concluded.

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    #13

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    taylarisms Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And he gets all douchey like that when 100% of the attention isn’t on him.

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    #14

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    rose_samanthaa Report

    #15

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    sycuhdelik Report

    Laura Lou
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow. There's just no words to describe how wrong this is!

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    #16

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    lailatweetzx Report

    AzKhaleesi
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well at least he was honest...I guess. My ex was such a narcissistic F**K that everything was EVERYONE else's fault. Didn't matter what it was, it was always someone else.

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    #17

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    IfeSzn Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That “damn” was him being selfishly pissed off at the delayed/canceled booty call, because he canceled other plans with his bros for it. Nothing more. Hope you dumped him right then.

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    #18

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    mynamehere46 Report

    tuzdayschild
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The operative word in this post is "were", as in "were married".

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    #19

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    beahlailey Report

    Jon S.
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you've never had anxiety or a panic attack it can seem like childishness to witness someone break down over a simple task, but my god the distress is so real (and we are usually perfectly aware it is also irrational).

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    #20

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    cidneymarshall Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hope you dumped him, because being with him would ruin your life.

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    #21

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    neeeeyuhhh_ Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No one makes us do anything, unless they’re physically forcing us to. Otherwise, we CHOOSE our reactions, even if we don’t realize it. He could’ve chosen not to cheat, but instead he gave in to his impulses, then tried to project his guilt on you. You are innocent. He’s the guilty party. Hope you dumped his cheating ass.

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    #22

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    itspengdreezy Report

    Jon S.
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean, if you were in the middle of an argument it might have been the best thing to do. You cannot expect someone to switch from defensive to supportive because of tears. The most you can expect is that with reflection they see how important the issue is to you.

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    #23

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    _karinasteph Report

    denzoren
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What a horrible thing to say.

    deanna woods
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do these guys not have a filter in their brains or do they just not have a working brain?

    Teresa Spanics
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I went to elementary and high school with guys like.

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    StrawberryParfait
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Negging. And a very poor one at that. I hope you laughed in his face and blocked him.

    Elle Emme
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My (ex) boyfriend told me I was going to be really ugly when I got older Soni should stay with him because no one else would ever find me attractive anyone else to

    Mazer
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That’s the sickest backhanded compliment I’ve ever heard

    Luna Moth
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I had one that would tell me I was pretty but other girls were way hotter and he stuck around because I was a nerd and it kind of made up for it. Kind of.

    BlackPearltheSeaWing/NightWing
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well he's just as ugly as he always was, maybe even more so!

    Nancy Lynch
    Community Member
    Premium
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    You were never ugly. All women are beautiful!

    Mark Kelly
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And too bad he's even more of an a******

    P. Mozzani
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And, I assume that he looked like a movie star . . . hardly!

    Debby Marengo
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm sure he won the Mr. America contest that year too.

    Lisa Monzon
    Community Member
    3 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I basically got the same comment from my first "boyfriend." Instead of decking him and running away, I said "thank you." Thank you? OMG!

    Denise Mclean
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Make him Ugly, see how he likes it ! Use your choice of Mud !

    HammerzToe
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    People are so cruel sometimes. How sad.

    Tracy Jones
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    what a liar you are beautiful!

    Ninn Kynok
    Community Member
    4 years ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Well it is a compliment.

    Gemini
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I'm pretty sure it's not...

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    #24

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    Cindy87798017 Report

    Trillian
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Shouldn't it be surprising that HE is still alive after that day (assuming he is)?

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    #25

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    dani_boi16 Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m 60, and discovered decades ago that some adults are so childish—-rude, impulsive, selfish, and totally lacking in critical thinking skills, empathy, and a filter between their brains and their mouths—-that they DO need to be told to be nice to others. Sometimes they’re so devoid of even the most basic social skills that they actually need to be taught HOW to be nice to others, as well. We need to do a better job raising our children, folks, so this population of sociopaths decreases instead of increases.

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    #27

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    _chynnamichele Report

    deanna woods
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That is sociopathic behavior to get enjoyment out of someone crying.

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    #28

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    creativeassbae Report

    Aunt Messy
    Community Member
    Premium
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Drive away in your new car and don't look back. Let him abuse his new fuckpuppet.

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    #30

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    shadybis Report

    denzoren
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Guys like this are usually all in for an open relationship but would start crying if the woman was getting more attention.

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    #31

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    daisabenaa Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    “Best friend”, my ass. Leave him to her. He’ll soon learn the grass isn’t always greener somewhere else. It happened to me a couple times when I was single. They both came running back pretty quickly, knocking on my door, and begging me to forgive them and to take them back. They both got my door slammed in their faces, and I couldn’t give a s**t just how long they stood there before it dawned on them that they weren’t going to be let in my house, that they pissed on—-and lost—-the affection of a much better person than the ones they left me for, and it was all their own stupid horndog fault.

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    #32

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    Safe__Havenn Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know some commenters are going to work themselves into a lather over this, but I don’t care. If it was me, and I was in med school, got pregnant, and the douche I was dating said something like that to me, I would have an abortion. I would not want his child, definitely would not want anything that would obligate me to have anything to do with him ever again. He would be totally cut out of my life. I would wait to have a child with someone wonderful who would be totally worth the wait.

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    #34

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    jasminericegirl Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My reply would’ve been, “then I hope you and League will be very happy together, and you’re now officially an incel”.

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    #35

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    Phumyfied24 Report

    Ripley
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    That's actually abusive manipulation.

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    #36

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    ArcherKimani Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think they call that “negging” these days. I don’t know why people still do it. I’m 60, and it didn’t work when I was young, it didn’t work when my mother was young, so it isn’t going to work now, and still won’t work in the future. Time to flush that tactic down the shitter where it belongs. Have a f*****g funeral for it. Get rid of it. Once and for all.

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    #37

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    JemisonJaclyn Report

    deanna woods
    Community Member
    4 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This guy sounds like a real sociopath and I hope you got away from him.

    #38

    Women-Realized-Partners-Hate-Them

    destinnyyyyy_ Report

    Kathryn Baylis
    Community Member
    4 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    No dear, that’s not the French word for what you’re thinking.

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