Pregnant Woman Comes Home From The Hospital To Find Her House Completely Trashed, Is Expected To Clean It All Up, Wonders If She Was Wrong To Call Mom For Help
When returning home after a week in the hospital, most people might expect to find a bouquet of flowers from their partner, a sparkling clean house and a relaxing atmosphere that’s conducive to their healing. Unfortunately, for one expectant mother, her recent stay in the hospital was likely much more peaceful than the drama that ensued after. Below, you’ll find the full story that she shared on Reddit detailing the tumultuous days that followed her return home.
After spending a week in the hospital, this expectant mother went home hoping to rest and heal
Image credits: Liubomyr Vorona (not the actual photo)
Unfortunately, what she found upon arrival was a huge mess, courtesy of her husband and his brother’s family
Image credits: Kemal Yildirim (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Esra Afşar (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Taylor Grote (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Anton (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Even-String-3530
It’s understandable for couples to want to keep their issues private, but when one partner desperately needs help, it’s natural to reach out to family members
Image credits: eudial2224 (not the actual photo)
This situation would be upsetting enough for any spouse or partner to experience, but especially when a woman is pregnant and ill, her partner should be going out of their way to ensure that she is not in stressful situations. According to March of Dimes, increased levels of stress during a pregnancy can increase a mother’s chances of having a baby who is born premature or having a low-birthweight baby. There are also a variety of health issues linked to babies who are born premature, such as cerebral palsy, behavior problems like ADHD, mental health conditions such as developing depression later in life and even neurological disorders.
Even the mother herself can experience a host of dangerous and unpleasant symptoms caused by stress during her pregnancy. These might include normal pregnancy discomforts (such as trouble sleeping and morning sickness) becoming exacerbated, developing problems eating which can lead to becoming over or underweight, or developing high blood pressure during pregnancy. Some pregnant women also find themselves under so much stress that they seek unhealthy coping mechanisms that will harm their baby, such as smoking or drinking alcohol.
It’s also especially important for expectant mothers to avoid stressful situations, for the health of herself and the baby
To help reduce stress during a pregnancy, March of Dimes recommends staying healthy and fit by eating a balanced diet, getting plenty of rest and exercise. They also recommend that pregnant women cut back on all activities they don’t need to do, such as household chores that their partner can pick up. It can be wise to try relaxation activities, such as prenatal yoga or meditation, and taking a childbirth education class can help assuage any fears the expectant mom may have. It’s also important to have a strong support network, including the mother’s partner, friends and family.
It is the responsibility of everyone around the expectant mother to work to make her life easier. Sometimes, this means simply staying out of her way and allowing her some peace. And in this particular case on Reddit, her husband could have easily cleaned up the home and shown his wife some support. She needs rest, especially after being ill. The last thing she needs is to be worried about the state of her home and overwhelmed by her in-laws barging in and wreaking havoc.
All couples shift when a child comes into the picture, but it’s up to them to ensure that the changes aren’t for the worse
Image credits: stockbusters (not the actual photo)
As some of the comments on Reddit noted, it can be concerning when a partner seems to suddenly change, and the reason for this husband’s change might be their baby on the way. According to Tracy K. Ross, LCSW, it is natural for a relationship to shift when a child comes into the picture, but both partners need to be mindful of these changes to ensure that they don’t all become negative. “We know from research that a relationship that’s not given attention will get worse,” Ross told Healthline. “If you do nothing, the relationship will deteriorate — you’ll be co-parents arguing about tasks. You have to put work into the relationship for it to stay the same, and work even harder to improve it.”
Thankfully, it sounds like the situation is improving and that her family members have been supportive in recent days, so we can only hope that issues like this never arise again. We would love to hear your thoughts on this situation in the comments below, pandas. And then if you’re interested in reading another Bored Panda article featuring spousal drama that ensued when a mom returned home, look no further than right here!
The expectant mother later provided more information on the story, responding to some of the readers who were on her side
Readers unanimously agreed that the woman had done nothing wrong, noting how wonderfully her family responded in this situation
NTA, but I give your MIL and husband credit for realizing they were.in the wrong, and to your MIL for pitching in and helping set up your care, too. I can’t even imagine your sickness and stress. Perhaps your husband will realize the gravity of his error, and this could be a way forward for you both.
Yes, massive kudos to MIL who was only wrong up to the point of stepping inside, confronted with the evidence and did an immediate about face - it can take a lot to admit you're wrong and she didn't hesitate. Husband, on the other hand, needed both mothers to shove evidence in his face, with shouting and disapproval. MIL also gets bonus points for the after care meal planning. It honestly sounds like SIL is the problem here - it all stems from her behaviour. I wonder if there's more going on with her that needs help too.
Load More Replies...
Here's update: "Talk with husband: summed up since it lasted 4 hrs. it was a hard talk. He is remorseful. Bil was only supposed to stay for a couple of nights. Then leave originally he thought they would be gone before I got home. He said he is tired and emotionally upset himself. When I originally passed out. My husband left to help a friend move. He came home and found me. He said he has no idea how long I was on the floor hurt. He was originally scared I had died. Since then he has had nightmares. On top of dealing with his family drama. He admitted to dumping his frustration onto me. When it's not my fault. He begged me for another chance. The next steps. We are still separated. He plans on staying at my brother house in his casita. We are going to go to marriage counseling and Individual counseling. He asked if he could come when the home health nurse comes each night and to my Dr's appointments. I agreed to that."
"Update on BIL: his wife admitted to having and affair. She told him she got married too soon and doesn't want the responsibilities of being a mom anymore. I am not sure what will happen with him and his kids but, I am shocked that she feels this way especially with her kids."
Load More Replies...
I’ll hold them down for you if you give me the first punch for each of them.
Load More Replies...
NTA, but I give your MIL and husband credit for realizing they were.in the wrong, and to your MIL for pitching in and helping set up your care, too. I can’t even imagine your sickness and stress. Perhaps your husband will realize the gravity of his error, and this could be a way forward for you both.
Yes, massive kudos to MIL who was only wrong up to the point of stepping inside, confronted with the evidence and did an immediate about face - it can take a lot to admit you're wrong and she didn't hesitate. Husband, on the other hand, needed both mothers to shove evidence in his face, with shouting and disapproval. MIL also gets bonus points for the after care meal planning. It honestly sounds like SIL is the problem here - it all stems from her behaviour. I wonder if there's more going on with her that needs help too.
Load More Replies... Here's update: "Talk with husband: summed up since it lasted 4 hrs. it was a hard talk. He is remorseful. Bil was only supposed to stay for a couple of nights. Then leave originally he thought they would be gone before I got home. He said he is tired and emotionally upset himself. When I originally passed out. My husband left to help a friend move. He came home and found me. He said he has no idea how long I was on the floor hurt. He was originally scared I had died. Since then he has had nightmares. On top of dealing with his family drama. He admitted to dumping his frustration onto me. When it's not my fault. He begged me for another chance. The next steps. We are still separated. He plans on staying at my brother house in his casita. We are going to go to marriage counseling and Individual counseling. He asked if he could come when the home health nurse comes each night and to my Dr's appointments. I agreed to that."
"Update on BIL: his wife admitted to having and affair. She told him she got married too soon and doesn't want the responsibilities of being a mom anymore. I am not sure what will happen with him and his kids but, I am shocked that she feels this way especially with her kids."
Load More Replies... I’ll hold them down for you if you give me the first punch for each of them.
Load More Replies...
124
37