Over the past days, the media has produced possibly one of the most intense news cycles since the end of the Cold War. And for good reason. Russia's invasion of Ukraine, a sovereign European country, is an unprecedented act of war in the 21st century.
But if you feel like you need a distraction from the grim headlines and you're the type of person who can find comfort in the positive side of the internet, you're not alone. The Instagram account kALE SALAD is here for you.
The guy behind the account calls himself the "king of wholesome memes" and I know what you might be thinking: people who crown themselves are rarely worthy of the title. But 3.8 million people think this one is.
Browsing kALE SALAD's feed, it's hard to disagree with them. Continue scrolling and take a look for yourself.
More info: Instagram
This post may include affiliate links.
Anyone remember that post with a huge lighted fox decoration, and an actual fox coming to stare at it? <3
I wish I could see the raccoon's face... is it filled with wonder, or is he just wondering if the shiny things are edible?
I'm waiting to see their cat looking out from the tree with all the lights on the ground...
When I was a small child, my family used to strip the tree after the holidays & then take it outside & hang it with seed & suet balls. It was always a lot of fun to watch the birds, squirrels & raccoons have at it. Of course, back then we didn't keep the tree anywhere near as long as people do now in the US - it'd be inside for maybe a week.
I'm actually not sure what the OP is doing tomorrow... Is she installing a wildlife camera of her own, or is she visiting this one to have her picture taken?
That is absolutely brilliant and I fully intend to use it forever.
Load More Replies...We say this all the time in my house, just not with mushrooms.
Load More Replies...I want to know who was the first person to look at a chicken and said, "the next thing that comes out of that chicken's butt, I'm gonna eat"
Same with whoever discovered Devil's pool in Victoria Falls. Who was the suicidal who discovered this part of the falls?
I think it's even more remarkable because mushrooms just don't even look like they'd taste good. It was a brave or very hungry person who ate the first one
Or an observant one. Lots of other animals eat mushrooms with relish. Problem is, some of them aren't affected by ones that can kill us.
Load More Replies...While we may feel guilty for being joyful while others are grieving, happiness is actually very important in challenging times. Focusing on our own emotions can give us the resilience we need to change situations both in our personal lives and on a larger scale.
Dr. Laurie Santos, who is an expert on the science and psychology of wellbeing, and shares her findings with thousands through her wildly popular Yale University course, The Science of Wellbeing, said that while it may sound counterintuitive, happiness is exactly what we need to get us through uncertainty, fear and anxiety over the future.
Is it both at the same time, and a lot of both
Load More Replies...This is my trusts and estates professor from UNC Law school! He's retired now but what a legend.
Back when I worked in volunteer radio, I took a small stuffed rhino into the studio with me and pretended I was talking to it in order to sound more natural. I called him the Radio Rhino!
And when you go back home for holidays and other visits, you can visit him. Every time you go to your hometown McDonalds, he can take your order.
Line from a song I love called "I'm The One That's Cool": "I appreciate you for being cruel; I'm burning bright, thanks to your rejection fuel".
Load More Replies...And that boy is probably a deadbeat college dropout loving in his parents basement
This is clearly a fake post. Do a reverse google search of the photos, the engineer never said that.
Load More Replies...But is that what she actually wanted to do or was it just to prove a point 🤔
Below you will find Dr. Santos's top insights from the field of positive psychology on happiness and how it can help us to overcome difficult situations like the ones we are facing today.
"We can harness the toughness to experience the power of post-traumatic growth," Dr. Santos said.
Difficult situations have the potential to make us stronger and even happier in the long run. By surviving a particularly tough scenario, we learn to appreciate what is truly meaningful and important in life and how to better prepare ourselves to face future adversity.
Damn! That's one hell of a birth story to pass on to future generations!!
I was born to Bob Marley music, that’s cool I guess
Load More Replies...This reminds me of my Mom : she was so over pregnancy with me that she asked her doc what she could do to induce labor naturally. He told her to clean house, so she did. Right as she grabbed the dry Christmas tree to throw it away, her water broke. The thing is, and it just dawned on me a few weeks ago, I'm born September 9th... SHE LIVED HER WHOLE PREGNANCY WITH A F*****G DRY CHRISTMAS TREE !! I don't know how she didn't kill my Dad for doing this to her, lol...
how is this wholesome ? i mean, it sure is epic in some way, but....yea....
Seriously. Denying the other parent the opportunity to be there for their child's birth... so wholesome!
Load More Replies...I drove myself to the hospital when I went into labor early. But that's only because my ex husband was a lazy a**face. They managed to stop my labor and then I drove home.
I was born in September 1973. My mom’s water broke, she mowed the lawn because she knew my dad wouldn’t do it and then drove herself to the hospital (with a pit stop at Hardee’s to get some food because she knew that hospital food sucks). During her pregnancy she and a few of her pregnant friends went to see ‘Behind the Green Door’ to see what was the big deal (no pun intended) about XXX flicks and were thrown out for laughing too much. She was annoyed that she went into labor on a Monday because she was going to miss the Packers play the Jets (the Packers won). I was ten pounds when I popped out - NATURAL BIRTH - she always said that she wanted at least six kids, but my giant head made her decide that two kids was enough.
I wonder if your father has ever lived it down... and I don't think your mom is petty. This sounds like a legit beef to me.
I drove myself to the hospital while in labor. The lights seemed to turn red for my contractions, or i pulled over. It was 1am so it was all good.
This is just petty and sad that she would do that to another person period. Simply because your father wouldn’t give her enough attention. I hope your parents are divorced because it sounds like a manipulative unhealthy relationship.
F**k yes I did this too! Birthed twins SOLO (and now raising some perfectly petty little badasses solo) 💪
I was born in the 70s during the last oil and gas shortage. My dad's day to get gas (based on license plate number) was Friday, the same day I was born. He stopped for gas on the way to taking my mother to the hospital to have me.
Heck if you live in close proximity this is a wonderful and considerate thing to do.
You have exactly 333 upvotes, that is the ONLY reason I'm not upvoting you.
Load More Replies...There are some people under the impression the Cry-It-Out (CIO) method is abuse. This parent is not abusing a baby by letting him cry. There is more than one type of CIO. I prefer the Ferber method. This parent is using a different method, and only using it for a week. So chill, ladies and gentlemen. Maybe partake in some tequila. Have a nice day.
Mammals babies sleep tight to the mother for a long time. Human babies are mammals. They need to be close to the mother as much as possible.
Load More Replies...Anyone who is willing to bribe me with tequila is a-ok in my book
Receipt that is NOT how you do cry-it-out! That's how you teach the baby to suck it up, nobody cares
I would swap places with them to keep watch the bawling bundle of joy... So the parents get a good night's sleep. My 1st kid a boy had colic. Couldn't sleep belly up or without burping n puking constantly. I had to turn him over n hold in my arm, let him tummy press on my forearm n head in my palm. Walk around all night. So I know it's hard parenting the brats..
I never understood this type of parenting. We just naturally adopted co-sleeping in the family bed. We have so many happy memories of all snuggling up together. Bedtime was never an issue at all in our house. The kids always put themselves to bed when they were tired and never had any problem waking up. (I suppose that if we didn't have a king size bed and had more than two kids, we might reconsider doing this. It wouldn't really be an option for a family like the Duggars 😄 )
Good God!!! I love that woman. Their boy will surely grow up to be exceptional.
I know!! To be so considerate and funny whilst her brain oozes...I would have to become her friend after that
Load More Replies...Im a mother, too. With one of my 3 children, i had no choice but to sleep train because rocking, driving in a car, snuggling, bundling didn’t work. It’ll be a cold day in hell that I allow ANYONE to say I abused my child. It took 4 long, painful, dreadful nights. Fast forward to today and my child is 34 years old, a married mom of 1 & a successful businesswoman who calls me her best friend, despite having MANY people in her life who love and adore her.
Load More Replies...Lol I made of one these 4 years back and still have it. It's ugly af on the inside WhatsApp-I...a-jpeg.jpg
I sometimes carry 2 wallets. 1 that was cheap but looks sort of nice, there's a few old plastic cards in (gas card, ancient ensurance card, empty and expired bus card, old bank card from an accout that no longer exist and a bank I am no longer a customer of etc -----no accurate personal data and/or old home adresses on any!!!-----), a couple old grocery receipts that I kept for this especially, a ticket stub I found on the street and about 70 cents in coins. I do this when I'm going to some place new and am unsure how safe my things will be and sometimes when I go out by myself and am unsure if I'll only stay at my regular bar or not. Then I have another seperate small wallet with some cash, my ID and bank card, I keep that either in a hidden pocket of my jacket, or somewhere on my body. A thief might steal my whole purse, but all he gets is a cheapass wallet siwth some trash in it, a lipstick and a 1 euro pocket mirror
I carry 2 wallets, too! The fake one with fake cards is easily accessible, but the real wallet is hidden in my clothing.
Load More Replies...I keep an empty chapstick tube in my car with a $100 bill rolled up in it for emergencies. Nobody steals used chapstick
Awesome! Mine's a beat up Altoid box with a rubber band around it.
I have a friend whose wallet is an elastic band... Still looks like trash but not as great for not losing money and stuff!
Oh come one don't share tips like these on the internet or they'll soon be wiirthless. (I made several for me and my freinds)
Here is how you make that wallet.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fqraS3Bx5mY&t=118s
"If we want to be happier during times of stress, we need to use a special mechanism of protecting ourselves, and we can do that through social connection."
When used properly, technology has the power to keep people connected even when they are physically apart from each other. Loneliness and isolation can have a major negative impact on both our mental and physical health, so Dr. Santos suggests embracing those Zoom happy hours and exploring new ways to maintain relationships with family, friends, and coworkers.
Yeah, I mean I thought was funny, but my boys have had things like that said to them: we want equality, not to dominate.
Load More Replies...This little girl has been hearing some not-so-nice stuff, and I'm afraid she might grow up to be quite a cynical person...
I just told my brother this and oh the slideshow of expressions from curious to unimpressed to ultimate acceptance [I showed him the replies to this, and he's laughing so hard rn smh]
I admit, I'm confused. I've heard from a lot of forward-thinking, progressive people on this site, but many of the comments here are against every modern, feminist voice I've heard here. If this was a boy saying this to a girl, everyone would be pissed. So why is this okay?
Tamra Stiffler I got 13 downvote as of now for saying that
Load More Replies...Yes this post is sexism. Sexism is not feminism. Your comment is also sexism.
Load More Replies...We all know that if the roles were reversed, there would be an outrage. Right?
*looks over to my bf* if you don't give me a 12kg wheel of cheese it's not gonna be pretty
I would take cheese over flowers any day of the year.
Load More Replies...I’m not sure a man who gets too drunk to recognize a loved one is a keeper, but he’s definitely not without redeeming qualities. 😀
Load More Replies...I met my boyf once when he had been out with his mmates and was v drunk, whilst we were walking, I kissed him, and he said 'don't tell my girlfriend'.
Sorry, i dont get it. If he had a girlfriend then why'd he go over your place, into your bedroom, undress himself at first!? I m confused...
That was his gf. He went home but didn't realize the girl in their room was his gf bc he was so messed up.
Load More Replies...OMG 💀 Its currently 2 a.m. and I bursted out laughing so hard . Im scared if my parents heard me laughing 😐
It's a much nicer joke than many... I have had some real scares on April 1st
I did that for April fools day recently for my teachers. The only one who knew something was up was the one who taught me in the second grade
However, Dr. Santos said studies on happiness also suggest that a big part of it comes from focusing on other people.
Even though we hear a lot about self-care these days and this text is kinda advocating it too, the reality is that truly happy people are what Dr. Santos refers to as "other-oriented."
Meaning, helping others, especially during times of crisis, makes us feel good and gives us a sense of purpose. Not only are we boosting our own mood by lending a hand, but we are also working towards solving real problems.
As a teacher I have to say that I don't understand this ban. I'm sure this is something the teacher should be able to handle...
The teacher banned them? That's mean. I drew Mario Bros scenes on my son's napkin that I included with his packed lunch every day when he was in primary school. The kids at lunch went crazy over the napkin each day and I was never told I couldn't do it.
Sad that the teacher did that. I can imagine several ways she could have incorporated the bananas into a lesson plan. A shame when the kids were showing so much interest and enthusiasm.
That's f****d up that Zac doesn't get his mother's affection cause a teacher can't handle 6 year olds.....
Blurry picture, stupid Panda reader, I don't know...one or the other I can't figure it out
I’m always chaotic neutral in DnD games, so I can do things like this
Load More Replies...From the people in his basement because only a evil person would do this
Load More Replies...Had to walk - the phones took all the space
Load More Replies...Google Maps creates live traffic data from phones with their location on. By having a cart full of phones moving slowly along a street, Google Maps assumes there is a traffic jam and displays this in the live map.
Load More Replies...Wait, so if we throw a party near an intersection, Google maps will go red?
Nevermind, I have 4 friends, it might actually turn brighter green thanks to our giant party...
Load More Replies...I honestly thought Omicron was another bitcoin thing for the first 2 weeks ..
I thought the post was funny as hell then I get here. Quiet-laughing is so hard
Load More Replies...Hmmm. I wonder if what I had was sparkling or the real thing... I'm not pretentious, so I hope it was sparkling. Is there a test?
I LOVE Jokes for Nerds, and this reminds me of a favorite: “Actually, it’s pronounced Netanyawhom.”
"If we want to be happier and if we want to protect our willpower and get more resilient and even improve our performance, we need to harness the power of gratitude," Dr. Santos added.
Gratitude might not be the first thing that comes to mind during a life-altering experience such as a global pandemic or war, but acknowledging even the little things that we appreciate in our everyday life can improve our overall wellbeing and boost our emotional resilience.
we took our newborn son who had jaundice out in the sun 15mins a day for two weeks. he is now a healthy 16yo rascal!
Same with my parents. They also put my crib right underneath a window.
Load More Replies...My niece had to do this when she was born and we called it her clubbing lights and did "boots and cats" disco music when we turned on the light.
F’real want a pair. Is that a “pair”? Whatever you call it, I want it.
Smittens ... Ha, i had to comment it was too cute not to
Load More Replies...I want one! But...can you also bring back my late wife too so I can hold her hand again?
It's already just a pattern on Ravelry and a free one at that. They are really cute though
Load More Replies...I'm going to be that one person and point out that it's crochet, not knitting...I'll let myself out
Load More Replies...I hope you find someone who loves you this much. Just make sure he or she deserves you! ❤️
Load More Replies...I recently saw a post by a millennial who asked a lonely senior in his apartment bldg for advice for problems he could easily solve himself just so the man (who loved talking to people, but had few opportunities) would feel needed. I think this move was a distant cousin, just saying.
when my mom was away, we ate waffles and deep-fried fish every day. It was heaven, but I was also relieved when she returned.
2nd time saw this "scene" here in BP, hv now idea - anyone mind telling me whats this about (other than being a hallowen thingy) please?
Mindfulness and meditation are powerful tools, especially when we're living under stress. "If we want to be happy, we need to find ways to be in the present moment, even if that present moment sucks."
We spend around 47% of our day with our minds wandering. By learning to truly focus on the present, we can be more productive and improve our sense of wellbeing by improving our stress response.
This is not funny when it's happening to you. But right now, it is. It so is!
and the beep to take it out is so LOUD. Like make it quiet at first and then get louder if needed.
I had this happen at my bank ATM once, and when I reached for my card it was instantly eaten by the machine, so I had to go in the bank; something I was trying to avoid by using the ATM.
What it just sucked your card in? LMAOOO
Load More Replies...Anyone who complains about ATMs or debit cards is too young to remember that bad old days when EVERY transaction involved getting to the bank on time, standing in a long line and then speaking to a teller while making sure you had your little bank book. It was either that or writing checks. You'd try to run into the store to buy a drink and end up in line behind an old lady trying to remember how to write a check. (And what was up with that "25/100 cents" thing you had to write?) And nothing matched the fun of balancing your check book...
I started using the tap and it changed my life. Only problem is every time I do it I swear it won't work and the cashiers gonna think I'm just slapping the reader with my card cause I don't know what I'm doing.
I love this story and friendship, google "wrong number thanksgiving invitation" if you haven't read it before.
I love that story. So sad the guy died :( (I fixed it)
Load More Replies...I have been a silent party to this "family" and their celebration since the first year. I look forward to it every year.
Omg 🤣 I remember seeing the first story and thought it was super sweet. I didn't realize they kept in touch
I get it... 2am is the perfect time to buy a mattress since you're tossing and turning on an uncomfortable bed thinking, I should be more comfortable right now
Or they were reading too much Harry Potter and lit their bed on fire by accident.
Load More Replies...I don't know what triggers those alerts. I travelled all over Europe one summer and never got a fraud alert. Come home, living in Virginia at the time, and then xmas comes along and I decide to visit family in Ohio for the holidays. Card gets frozen because I bought gas in West Virginia on the way there
The same thing happened to when I tried to buy a record player online at night. 😊
Mine was like "ok, lol" when someone tried to buy 1300 in the middle of the night on my card. The purchase was only declined because I had about 1250 limit left.
I got targeted by a purse snatcher once. About two days later, I got a call from someone who had found my wallet lying in the street. The only three items missing were cash, driver's license, and of all available, only my over-limit credit card.
Load More Replies...Bobbi Wilson Fein 1 minute ago What freaking mattress store is open at 2 AM???
You are aware that you can purchase mattresses online, right?
Load More Replies...We'll never know until the book is published! Which it MUST BE!
Load More Replies..."If we want to protect ourselves during tough times, we need to make room for healthy practices.”
When stress levels are high, it's really easy to skip a workout or two, make less nutritious choices at mealtimes or deprioritize our sleep. It can feel overwhelming to have to put this extra effort into "being healthy," but the reality is that these are the times when we need it the most.
I was just thinking the same. I bet mom is still stunning too.
Load More Replies...I think it's bc of the way she's holding her. Lol.
Load More Replies...Glad you went with a light green for the walls—-really brightens the room!
I once turned an unused closet into a library. I put shelves going front to back on either side and then left right so that I ended up with a square U shape of bookshelves. It was an absolutely brilliant idea. I just feel bad that in my new apartment I don’t have that free closet or I’d do it all over again.
That's gorgeous I love green and those chairs are perfect. You did good.
Yeah, but we (US) drive at 16 (and can get a learner’s permit at 15 1/2), so it makes sense to put off drinking until we’re old enough to be working, and off our parents’ car insurance policy.
Load More Replies...Maybe he drank all the foam? Idk how alcohol works.
Load More Replies...Ok so I use to work as a beer girl at the golf course ! I always wore a pink hard hat Incase I got hit with a ball! Of course people would ask “ why the hard hat” and people would ask “ what happens if I hit the hat “. So I started saying if someone hit my hard hat I would buy them a beer! Well after several years it happened a guy hit my hat. It was a father and son! The son was the one that hit my hat ! I told them that I’ve always said I would buy someone a beer if they hit my hat but since it was the kid I would give him a Gatorade. Then the dad was like “ no wait! He’s 18 he just graduated and he’ll be going off to college soon! Give him the beer and I’ll take one too !” So they enjoyed a beer together that day on the golf course and I still think it’s adorable!
Beyond our physical wellbeing, exercise is a great way to relieve stress and improve our mental state, a balanced diet can have mood-boosting benefits, and getting the recommended 7-9 hours of sleep each night can keep us happier, more focused, and improve our immunity. By maintaining these healthy habits, even when we just don't feel like it, we become stronger in dealing with the current stressors and will be better equipped to handle difficult circumstances in the future.
The printer at work always works fine ... Except when you're in a rush to submit a tender document at 1pm
I've given up. That's just fcking bad planning ( for the millionth time ) and I'm not taking the blame anymore.
Load More Replies...This reminds me of when a coworker couldn't get the printer to work, she had a total meltdown and pressed print like a psycho. Suddenly the printer started and just didn't stop, so she had a panic attack and was about to throw the printer through the window. I had to remove nearly 800 pages from the queue. She wasn't allowed near the printer ever again.
I refused to let myself send anything to the work printer via the ipad again after it stuffed up and I pressed print only 2 extra times! I would plug the ipad into the computer, copy the document and print from there for the next two years!
Load More Replies...As an IT Professional for the past 15 years I can confirm printers are the worst and my least favorite thing to troubleshoot. Out of all the devices that connect with USB/Wi-Fi/Bluetooth, printers are the most troublesome to set up.
College printers. "Excuse me I can't get the printer to work" "did you enter your password backwards while hopping on one foot and smearing mayonnaise on yourself?" "Yes" "did you light incense and say the incantation?" "Oh that's what I forgot!"
Bonus idea: Make it so it uses ink that costs less than liquefied gold. But yes, I'd settle for just working. My HP printer literally never works on the first try and I have to go over and tap it to wake it up, sometimes unplug and re-plug it. The one feature that works 100% of the time though is the f*****g ad telling me I should sign up for their ink subscription service.
I've never owned a printer that's reliable. I have two printers. One will only print from my phone. The other one refuses to pick up an IP. It worked fine for over a year, now it's just decided to stop working. I had a Samsung color laser that worked OK but it over heated and stopped working. I had another Samsung laser that decided that it would be best to start making a horrible noise and die. I've been through a dozen Brother printers. They work pretty well but, once they need maintenance, you're screwed. Where the heck do I get "parts kit 3"? Even my Brother rep couldn't figure out how to order it.
I love both of these looks! I would 100% have rainbow hair, goth-vibe clothes, a mat that says 'go away' on it, and a rainbow fence.
Ha, what I thought too! Definitely call BS on this one!
Load More Replies...Thanks, can you help me to get the coffee I just spat out out of my keyboard please?
"When you look at the dark side careful you must be for the dark side looks back." -Yoda-
"... if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.” Nietzsche
Load More Replies...Wow ! Reminds me of the tent used by the Weasleys during the Quidditch World Cup. "I love magic."
"I love magic." said the boy who lived, the chosen one, the one who could not fix his own eyesight with one movement of his wand.
Load More Replies...I think your mom is secretly a sultan to afford that...sooo... might wanna check that out
Why??? Why does everyone think this would be so much money to set up? I don't get it. Yeah it's more than a little $100 tent and sleeping bags but damn it's not even a few grand
Load More Replies...That’s talent. And money. And creativity. And gumption. Ok I love this.
I count one queen size bed, 3 full size beds, 2 recliner looking things a few end tables but what size tent is that to be able to fit it all in? And are those air mattresses?
Load More Replies...Homeless person reading this: "Wow, that has not been my experience living in a tent..."
This is such a cute idea. I just came across some of my dad's shirts. I didn't want to get rid of them, but I didn't really know what to do with them. Might just have to give this a try.
I saw online and recreated dog bed shirt. I sewed the neck and end of sleeves on one of my mom's shirts. I stuffed it with pillow stuffing. Then I tied the wrists parts together. I gave her to her dog that misses her. That dog cuddles with its passed mama all the time. I've seen them sewn and stuffed just to hug too.
Load More Replies...None of the fabrics in that teddy are actually the shirt in the picture, but nice idea.
after my wife died 2 years ago, her stepmom gathered her old t-shirts and had them sewn into pillows. I assume my kids will be gifted with them eventually
❤️I am truly sorry that you and your kids had to go through that, I wish you well, and I think they will treasure it
Load More Replies...What a sweet keepsake. My friend's nana makes them quilts using family members old clothes, and I can sit with my friend and point at patches and she'll say "that's Aunt Rosa's favorite dress, and that's my brothers work shirt... my mom's nightgown... " It's really a nice thing to have.
My mom always gets rid of dads shirts because he has too many. I gladly take them. They are big, comfortable And smell as my dad, its soothing
It will only get more precious as time passes. What an amazing gift of love. When you hug it, it must feel a bit like you’re hugging him. I love it!
And then they ask you if they can have some of your water or some paper tissues but the next day they'll make fun of you for needing such a big bag again.
Lol. I always bring my laptop bag wherever I go. In it i keep chapstick, a water bottle, hand sanitizer, and a light zip up hoodie, if it's cold. Also my laptop, phone charger, Motrin, antacid, stick of deodorant, screw driver and bits, a folding knife, and headphones. I never realized that it wasn't masculine. I just thought I was being prepared.
That's why we women have to have a big handbag - to carry everything else for them lol
No first aid kit, no emergency anti-shock blanket, no rations, no spare medications... Or is that just me? ;-D
My grandpa used to say "spectacles, testicles, watch and wallet" and do a genuflecting type thing. Keys were #2, pocket watch and wallet were in his suit jacket.
Load More Replies...And yet my husband is constantly asking me to hold some things in my purse.
That just means we don’t need so many things. Seems paranoid and unesssary to carry so much.
What was inappropriate was the customer was rude enough not to answer and go crying to mommy... (Manager) to complain. Frikking tattle tale.
I had a customer ask me once if I was dumb because I couldn't answer a barrage of questions all at once. I asked him if he was a jackass. I regret nothing. He'd been coming in repeatedly to belittle other employees to make himself feel better and none fought back. Too bad he found me.
I didn't tell a customer to kiss my ass. I told her my name is Kiss my ass.
“Dumb” actually means “temporarily unable or unwilling to speak”. Using it to mean stupid is just slang. So asking if the customer is dumb might be a compassionate enquiry into his health and well-being. I’d hang my hat on that one.
Lady at my work where I’m at the front door to check receipts. She’s yanking on the handle and yells “uuughghh how do you open this stupid door?!?” I said. “You push it….” She glared at me and left. Then I got called into the managers office because she called and wanted the manager to fire me. I got written up for answering her question. I don’t miss working at guitar center.
Wait what? What happened? Did you send your dog in for a haircut and they gave back one they ordered on Wish?
Ok Weasel, scrat, sloth, scrat, dinosaurs, scrat, mammoth, scrat, saber, scrat,... Didn't find a dog .. And just realized had someone killed scrat - there would've been eternal darkness and no life on earth.
Load More Replies...Yeah, I learned how to groom my dog myself. The amount of money and times it costs to get a dog back that wears a f*cking mullet for hte next five months ist just not worth it.
Not to mention they are often mistreated by the underpaid groomers.
Load More Replies...Did they trim her with a weed whacker? The look in her eyes says they trimmed her with a weed whacker. This dog has seen War.
When I was in high school beepers were a thing and while in government class I get a beep of my home number and 911 after it. That means it’s a super emergency and to call asap. So I get a bathroom pass and rush to the payphones. It was my dad and he was bored and wanted to know what I was up to. Uhh dad I’m at school… “oh yea…..” poor guy just didn’t know what to do with himself after retiring from his job after 25 years.
OMG, I do this all the time! I use too many exclamation marks, and then have to go back and replace a few with periods so I don't look/seem like a psycho! LOL
I am all ellipses and exclamation points! Sometimes I throw in a ; just to look smart.
I did this just the other day! I did ask myself if I was using ";" in the correct context. Decided "F it", no one else really knows either!
Load More Replies...I'm so glad the younger people easily see how f****n' stupid American email "etiquette" is.
And das why I love god. (Please tell me you all got the joke...sorry I'll just see myself out.)
My brain spent 30 seconds trying to crack your Di Vinci code joke only to have my mom help me out
Load More Replies...Das is what my daughter calls me in a text when she hits the wrong letter. I told her I was going to change my name to Das so she wouldn't feel bad about it.
It could be real, have you ever met a genuine italian grandmother. They live for matchmaking AND feeding people!
Load More Replies...Definitely fake (no Italian with any clue how to cook would know Risotto isn't pasta) but if this doesn't essentially sound like every Italian granmama then I don't know what does. Usually followed up at some point by, "what's a matter with you, huh?"
Ugh... really?! Come on... You are only going to move if you're getting married? And you're only going to meet a guy if you know how to cook him "them good pasta and risotto..."? Am I not getting the joke or is this so 1950?
If being seduced into the Dark Side of the Force skips a generation, you in trouble.
Feel the force Juan, Follow the force Juan, and may the force be with u Juan. But dont be tempted by the dark side..
Haha!! This is SUPER smart!!! (is it bad I kinda want to try this!!)
THIS! ☝ I sell on an online platform where prices are negotiable & get lowballers all the time. I'd might appreciate them if they had some tact, instead of trying to play me as a fool. Told one that if he walked into a store offering that price, they'd laugh him out the door. Told him he just stepped into mine... I'm so doing this if selling on a local market
No. The bozo was still asking for directions on seeing u got him to a comedy club. Should have shut off and run home.
I should try this with those people who haggle right down on facebook marketplace.
[Jared Kleinman has entered the chat] KiNkY! I am so, so sorry.
All I can see is a pair of disembodied legs bent down like an M with a sucking hooha leaving a snail trail while sucking up dust.
I preheat my girlfriend's side of the bed before she comes to sleep 😀😀😀
Not an unreasonable request in these days of remote control heating systems I guess.
Atleast she warned him! ..usually they'll keep a poker a poker face, and wait..she must really like him..
Ok my last story for the day ! My dads friend is married to a twin! Dads friend, wife and twin sister were all on vacation together. The wife would go jog on the beach everyday . One day a man she had seen several times sitting on his porch called the wife over and told her she was so beautiful and he would love to take her to dinner. He was handsome and had a nice house on the beach so she was like “ I’m married but I have someone I would like you to meet” so she went and got her husband and sister! Everyone hit it off and the sister and the man on the beach fell in love and got married and last I heard were living happily ever after :)
Good, iidn't take 7 years to skip to the end that time.
Load More Replies...what good luck! you met someone who was gay but an identical twin of a straight man
Anyone know if this actually works in college as a female? I might have to try this...
Somedays I can't even begin to tell if the identical twin stuff is real or not.
I have never for the life of me understood why people have to make themselves look really moronic by typing "Lololololololol" or LMFAOOOO" or any other gobbledegook to show how amused they are. Why not just "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!"???
I ordered "for rectal use only" stickers off of Amazon and out them on random foods and tools at retail stores.... grandma's gonna be like WTF when she turns that giant Zucchini over.
Load More Replies...Almost as good as the fake outlet stickers a guy was putting around airports LOL
S**t that gives me an idea .. I'm surrounded by buggers wanting free stuff.
To be honest, for a 9 year old, that's a very bad spelling. Of course the person who wrote this might have dyslexia or something like that, but I've noticed the same problem other times too. I am not criticizing, I'm just honestly curious: is that level of spelling common for that age in the US?
LMFAO a few things to make fun of here, obviously, but my favorite is the 4th of Julie. Btw, who's Julie?
I'm crying I'm laughing SO HARD. Thank you. Today is my birthday. Screw all the presents... this is all I needed.
My sister showed me her old diary and u also read mine and can confirm that we are both idiots as well.
I laughed way too hard during school and now everyone’s looking at me
That's Yang! He is always ready and waiting to cheer people up at Hexham General. I had an op in December, and seeing him at the entrance really cheered me up!
I've met him too, he's absolutely stunning, these photos don't do him justice.
Load More Replies..."Cat in da hospital" are the kind of text language that makes me swoon.
Y'all have to read about Yang! There's a video of this little guy making the solo trek to the hospital (except on rain days). https://metro.co.uk/2020/03/28/yang-ginger-cat-bringing-cheer-visiting-patients-staff-hexham-general-hospital-every-day-12470117/
I love this energy! Sounds like something my sister or I would do for the other :)
I like it. It shows imagination, an artistic streak, and yes, it is sexy!
Yeah, why wouldn't she send nudes to 'toxic king'?? We all know guys never share these pics EVER
I really quite like her underwear. I wonder where she bought them . 🙈
I like the look, but was actually thinking they look uncomfortable lol
Load More Replies...I think this is very sexy. She's showing him her sparkly underwear. It's like a tease and that can be very sexy.
Most of them are chill and fun, at my place. The closing time lingerers, though…
This makes me laugh every time I see it. Good for the kid for being creative!
I don't see the wholesomeness in this one. But she got what she wanted so good for her.
Diane if you ever see this, I saw this post a few hours ago. Now I don't remember all the posts and pics that I see, especially when I'm scrolling through a bunch of lists. But I remember you and came back just to comment. (also you don't look like you're over 60, are you entirely sure? Was that a typo and are you going to be 52 this weekend?) Hope you have a great birthday!
Wow that's sad because my grandparents on my mom's side both died in their 60's
Awwwwwwwww, that's sweet. He can get buy some treats or whatever he wants.
Except live mice. He probably shouldn't buy live mice.
Load More Replies...We always have stockings and gifts under the tree for our pets. They’re part of the family, after all.
Same, even though I buy them toys about once a week anyway. It's just fun to wrap them and put them under the tree!
Load More Replies...My parents, too are making do with spoiling grandcats
Load More Replies...The bad news is that the drawing doesn't really look like her... The good news is that she doesn't look like her drawing. Joke aside she really captured the Burton-ness! :)
That looks like nightmare before Christmas lady you are way prettier in real life next time try a little less dark around the eyes
OMG why doesn't every dentist in the world have a therapy dog on staff??????
It would make going to work 100% better (work in a dental office)
Load More Replies...Lol this dog is wearing eyeliner and looks super anxious. Would be the best distraction ever
I hate going to the dentist and I'm scared of dogs so this is actually my worst nightmare. 😬
Therapy dog? More like dog needs therapy lmao it looks weirdly terrified
hmm... these pix are making me reconsider my tote bags. Imagine walking out the grocery with bread & milk in a planter LOL
Load More Replies...Thailand is covered in plastic. Seriously ... I went to a small local shop for a coke. Took it out of the fridge, to the counter, they opened the bottle, poured it into a little plastic bag, stuck a straw in it, used rubber band to close bag. I was dumbstruck.
gross. my ocd whould have none of that. just gimmie the bottle.
Load More Replies...Wait! There was actually an ENTIRE BORED PANDA POST ABOUT THIS! https://www.boredpanda.com/unusual-ways-people-dealing-plastic-bag-ban-thailand/?utm_source=bing&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic I remember reading it!
Well, it depends on the animal and do I have any weapons to use or is this hand to paw combat?
Star Wars, Transformers (Decepticon), GI Joe, He-Man/ Child of the 80's here. Do not recognise the third one in the top row though?
answer here ("fantastic four"): https://twitter.com/TwoClawsMedia/status/1211041756688605185/photo/1
Load More Replies...Are there some Irish people here who know how to say his name? I am intrigued.
"Yo Brad, what do babies look like again?" "Just a small man bro"
Darn it. You made me laugh so hard I just woke up this small man I have sleeping next to my bed, bro.
Load More Replies...Yeah that's a baby if you squint really hard you can kinda see a baby face.... no not really
Well that last sentence from Crocs isn't what I would call "family friendly" Lol
Family friendly until they don’t like what you have to say. Who knew Crocs are tan by assholes???
Too bad Rudy got suspended for platform manipulation (cheating). He was funny but I guess the numbers just meant too much
Stop drooling over the birthday boy. Stop it right now. And if you do, tell me how cause I can't.
Poor bloke, he probably spent his entire school career explaining to everyone that he was in fact a boy despite the name, and then had to spell it out.
My son and my birthday's are a week apart. My father has several times now created math formulas for our cakes to represent both but not focus on either. My 30th was his 10th so we got a 2 colour cake and he does 6x5/3 as the candles..... He's a nerd and I love him
So you just happen to live near each other? And they didn't react negatively to some rando asking to meet up? Then they're giving away a dog and willing to give their dog to a complete stranger? Why bother with these kinds of lies? It's just sad. If you need love so much that you're willing to lie to strangers for it maybe you should try being lovable instead? Just a thought.
People give dogs to random strangers all the time. My dog used to belong to a family who couldn't keep her. They put an ad on Facebook. I called the woman, talked to her, then drove to her house 55 minutes away, met the dog and brought her home with me. Now I've had her for four and a half years And we are perfect companions for each other. She will be seven on Saint Patrick's Day.
Load More Replies...Sadie does look a bit confused, poor baby. I hope she adjusted quickly into her new home. (And now I need to go cuddle my dog to cheer up. I would NEVER leave her behind for whatever reason. Never!)
I hope this is fake. Giving your dog to some random stranger? Really? UGH. No more dogs for you!!!
It has always been my experience that the right dog will find you. I wasn't even looking for a dog When my current dog found me. And I've had her for four years now.
It's always so crazy to look at the things you did when you were younger, and see all the crazy things you did you'd never do now.
ooh! new goal! become an uber driver and take beautiful photos like that! :D
We use that gesture too. But I have never tried it on a goat to be honest xD
Load More Replies...Ohhhh boy. I'm gonna look this up. (I assume it's good....I don't know who Kristi Yamaguchi is).
Kristine Tsuya Yamaguchi is an American former figure skater. In ladies' singles, Yamaguchi is the 1992 Olympic champion, a two-time World champion, and the 1992 U.S. champion. In 1992, she became the first Asian American woman to win a gold medal in a Winter Olympic competition.
Load More Replies...They do have it in 0.5. And even better, they have it in 0.38 too! First pen I've ever seen that came with a tip smaller than 0.5.
Load More Replies...hmm, do I yeet myself out (with a seatbelt ofc), or do I yeet the seatbelt out?
Damn, I am obviously old because I have no idea what "yeet" means. I suppose I could look it up in the Google on the cyberspace superhighway but I am increasingly enjoying these "get off my lawn" moments.
Lol it means to aggressively throw, like "I yeeted the rock over the wall". I had to figure it out when my kids started in with the whole "yeetus the fetus" thing. Freaking kids are weird 🤣 as was I when I was young.
Load More Replies...They don't know what yeet means, do they? This is just a great way for us teens to make even more fun of people lol
We clearly have the same sign writers in Australia. The one I saw the other day was something like ''Don't touch you phone while driving YOLO"
I wonder why they don't get tired? How can you keep going on the whole dang night??!!
Haven't you ever sat up talking all night? Same thing 🐶🐶🐶🐶
Load More Replies...I've had some rescue fosters who have sore throats from calling for help for so long, and some cats too. One little kitten was thrown in a dumpster; when I got him home he couldn't meow and didn't want to eat for three days. :(
Load More Replies...My dog constantly tells me he's not going to tell me again. Then he does.
This needs to be higher up on the list. I wheeze-laughed then showed it to my adult son and we both laughed until I told him he needs to pay for his phone now that he's 18. I was joking but the look on his face was priceless.
Properly caring for a goldfish is actually far more involved than tossing the nearly dead fish you won at a carnival into a vase of untreated tap water
Ellie is best goldfish and you MUST NOT LET YOUR MOM GET RID OF HER
No, goldfish are not the easiest pet you can get. Please do not get goldfish as a pet unless you have a pond/ very large (90+ gallon) tank. Cycle your tank/ pond before adding fish and please ethically source.
Oh I need to do this one day when getting an apartment ask the landlord if you can have a goldfish when he agrees send him this picture
Which airport? Lol. Totally not for drug trafficking reasons though. I wanna test this pizza sniffing dog out
I would like to see a Roomba fall of a cliff. I should check YouTube
He looks like his arm is out and he's running out of time to hold himself up
Tom and Jerry are actually friends. Tom pretends to constantly go after him so that the humans will leave him alone.
I appreciate that it wasn't an outright 0 despite not being on the book. Good teacher!
Oh my God.. Are you Afraid of the Dark was the creepiest show when I was a kid.
There might not be a queue at all if the pharmacists were not busy pouring prosecco. (In all fairness I prefer the cameraderie, booze and joy it brings, but it is a pandemic....)
The queue is while waiting for result, not because pharmacist is wasting time. There is nothing he can do to speed that up.
Load More Replies...Devious. Being honorable & noble requires truth. Trump wrecked truth-telling...copying the murderer & vulgar Putin.
Load More Replies...Why not just be upfront and honest and tell them you aren’t interested instead of playing games????
Have you not seen how a lot of people, both men and women, react to rejection? Too many people feel entitled to another person's time and attention and won't take no for an answer.
Load More Replies...Yeah pretty sure no one else she might ever meet is going to know about this. You're making more of a stretch than someone warning up for a marathon.
Load More Replies...At least he replied to his grandma...perhaps she tricked him into writing her [finally]?
Load More Replies...looks like Jason Biggs so all I can see is "American Pie"
Load More Replies...fun prank, paint one like an angel with blood all over it it can really change the mood
Why would you kill an angel they just want to help you on your way to heaven! ANGEL KILLER
Looks like there are at least two fellow introverts shopping at Sephora right now, as well.
I love the hall passes. But it's clearly not an English teacher that made those. An English teacher would never make those.
The hall pass for one of my teachers is a horse on a stick toy thingy? what do you call it?
How long did you spend trying to find the dog in the photo of the front of the house? And did you find it yet?
I assume the dog’s on the right-hand side of the left windows, above the garage. There’s a small shape there.
Load More Replies...I'd be sold of the chair lift came with the house. Great for toting laundry baskets and bags from the store if they are heavy
I got called one night because the cigarette machine in the club I work at was dispensing the wrong cigarettes. i.e someone would select Marlboro and get Camels. Select Camels and get something else. Turned out the girl who had the responsibility of filling the machine had put the packets anywhere. All the brands mixed together in each column. She said that she thought the machine knew which ones to pick!!
Ok.. men can be lazy but C;mon~ someone needs an IQ test. like he could qualify for benefits lol
That's the thing with men, you have to be really specific. He literally did what you asked. What more do you want.
I don't think I've EVER seen playing cards on the street. Where is this guy?
My pandemic project was leaving playing cards all over the city! (I've seen some squirrely autocorrects before, but this one is bananas!)
My pandemic project was putting on 30 pounds and growing hair in ALL the places, and I didn't even have to leave the house for it, lawl.
I think it's because the dad is basically saying he enjoyed smashing the mom and the person seeing the text had to imagine his parents doing the no-pants dance.
Load More Replies...Huh, seems a little unprofessional to me but therapists are all different so I guess I'll just move along.
The ace is the lowest card and the king is the highest card but if you play the king they can beat you with ace unless it's the king of diamonds than you have to play three of clubs but not when it's Friday and the queen of hearts has already been played because than you need the joker to make a grand slam and tee the jack of hearts into the money pit. Now let's play for real money...
I totally agree with this!! Boardgames - ok, but cardgames and I´m out.
For me it was my friend trying to teach me what she said was 'Austrian poker'. I can't even follow regular poker!
Well, to some people that’s fancy dining. Are they at least wearing the clean tee shirt when the propose? You know, special occasion and all.
I’ve had friends whose husbands proposed in a car, while raking (the ring box was hidden in leaves. Pretty risky bc my friend is the type where accidents happen 😆), rooftop bar, ski lift… any place is as good as the next!
Load More Replies...There's a reason there is a song called Fancy Like. The song in the Applebee's commercial. Some people don't need or want fine dining. I personally wouldn't even know what to do with myself in a fine dining restaurant. I would feel like Jack in Titanic when he gets to dine with Rose's family and friends on the ship.
Hahahahaaaaa!!! Finally, one worth the additional scroll past the original post!!!
Twilight has ruined me too, my dear friend. Observe: Random person:it's possible Me: it's a possiblityyyyyyyy
Load More Replies...Funny story, in my physics class, the student teacher posts a daily meme. This was one of them. I have never seen twilight, as such I had no idea who this was. I expressed that, and cue the email I got later that day from the actual teacher, a sixty some year old man explaining to me that twilight is crap and I shouldn't watch it. It was so funny, he treats me like a granddaughter
hello i just wanted to inform you that your username made me go down a scp rabbit hole and I'm not disappointed:))
Load More Replies...Okay well then what's the parents number did they just give me a random number so I wouldn't call them?? Yes, yes they did.
Bruh if you were 103.4 degrees then you should probably go to the ER
I mean...these seem pretty normal except maybe for the cowboy hat one. Dude just wants to see if you want to hang out.
Seriously, Ever read “The Silence of the Lambs”? (Hint: What was Buffalo Bill’s real name?)
Load More Replies...The plural form of James is Jamesi (Jayme-sigh). Me and my best friend, who is also named James, came up with that.
Why do so many people insist on spamming emojis in their messages? You can use just one I promise the other person will get the point.
It also says she's a female dog, and it looks like a male on the last panel.
What’s the bet that the alarm this person set is for 6:30 (looking at the time and the clock in the top right)
I have my clock icon on all the time because it's my alarm clock and it's recurring so it might not be
Load More Replies...Poor dad. I have been there; our first hamster was a escapist and it broke my heart every time. He would open the door of the cage and then close it so i would go crazy looking inside the cage to see if he was there. But we always retrieved him and eventually moved him to a DIY cage with a really heavy wooden lid.
BTW for all people who wnats or have hamsters. They need a lot of space and most comercial cages are too small for them. A syrian hamster needs minimum 80x60cm of space and its recommended to give at least 100x60cm. Our original cage was bought (and was 80x60) but it is better to do DIY since it is almost impossible to find big cages that are safe for hamsters. Look online, there are wonderful easy DIY cages for rodents. This also applies for gerbils, rats, guinea pigs etc; their cages are always too small in stores.
Load More Replies...They did! https://twitter.com/stephyj725/status/1198765466359140353?t=K-nxtTUjcue6xI19GEYZXA&s=19 full post if you're interested
Load More Replies...Everyone should be worried sick when their pet is missing. They are likely frightened and alone, unsure how to get home, or too injured to make it home. This level of concern is responsible pet ownership.
I mean it's a hamster. He's probably still in the house and knows how to get back.
Load More Replies...Considering a hamster is small enough to get into a LOT of places where they could easily be hurt or killed, it's kind of worrying the woman doesn't really seem to care. Feels sort of like "it's just a hamster it doesn't matter".
Not sure if you had the chance to see but the twitter thread was posted here too and she admitted she was just trying to calm her dad down! The hamster is the light of her life though and he was found safely!
Load More Replies...https://twitter.com/stephyj725/status/1198765466359140353?t=K-nxtTUjcue6xI19GEYZXA&s=19 full post if anyone is interested
I had one of those today, they taste amazing! Didn't cut it up though, because I'm not a psychopath
He anally raped a women (who only consented to vaginal sex) and then had his lawyers s**t shame her so she would drop the charges. Kobe Bryant is an awful person.
Seriously, wtf people? I thought I was the only one who remembered this happening. Some hero...
What a rude and racist thing to say. This is not ok. We will never fight racism and xenophobia with this attitude.
Right? EVERYONE is terrible. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
Load More Replies...A) How is this wholesome, and B) Yes, just because someone doesn't want to be involved in something involving a stranger they're automatically white. Could have just said "ok sorry" and left it at that.
They didn't think he was white because he didn't want to be involved with a stranger, they thought he was white because he was so ready to call the police over such a trivial thing.
Load More Replies...It is interesting how upsetting people find the reference to race in this post. I agree it wasn't necessary to bring it up, but I also find it interesting that the race stereotype here isn't "you're somehow less than" or "you're some sort of criminal or other negative label," but "you're comfortable with the idea of calling the police because of a minor annoyance." That's not to say it's ever appropriate to generalize about an entire category of people - in fact this may be a good illustration of how much people really dislike being stereotyped no matter what the stereotype is. And maybe some people could consider how much worse it must feel when the stereotype is particularly negative, as so many are.
I know right this is too much (I'm white btw)
Load More Replies...completely agree! So over the lazy BP editors just reposting reddit gripes.
Load More Replies...I know kale irl. I was shocked to see his page went from a normal insta to memes and having a whole following. It's insane that now I'm seeing it here lol.
Umm and I think you're like one of the only people here that even knows who you're talking about
Load More Replies...I don't think the title is right. Most of these are not memes and plenty aren't wholesome either.
Love this. Laughed out loud so much. It's phenomenally better than the BP posts which claim to be funny but are just stressful posts shaming people's behavior, or just downright creepy or complaining and griping. We come to Bored Panda because we need uplifting, not because we need to read about crap.
completely agree! So over the lazy BP editors just reposting reddit gripes.
Load More Replies...I know kale irl. I was shocked to see his page went from a normal insta to memes and having a whole following. It's insane that now I'm seeing it here lol.
Umm and I think you're like one of the only people here that even knows who you're talking about
Load More Replies...I don't think the title is right. Most of these are not memes and plenty aren't wholesome either.
Love this. Laughed out loud so much. It's phenomenally better than the BP posts which claim to be funny but are just stressful posts shaming people's behavior, or just downright creepy or complaining and griping. We come to Bored Panda because we need uplifting, not because we need to read about crap.
